Work Text:
︵⊹︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵⊹︵
Have you... missed me?
︶⊹︶⏝︶୨୧︶⏝︶⊹︶
Sea was in his room, lying on his back on the bed, one arm stretched out and the other bent behind his head. The afternoon light fell in oblique lines across the wall, filtered through sheer curtains, bathing the room in a warm golden hue. But inside him, everything felt grey.
He had been there for hours, unmoving, doing nothing. Staring at the ceiling as if hoping to find some kind of answer in the faded stains on the plaster. He had tried to read, to watch something on his phone, even to catch up on the tasks he had pending. Nothing held his focus. The world seemed to be moving as if he were outside of it, on pause.
A week.
It had only been a week since Jimmy had left for Switzerland to finish his course. The final stage of his studies. One month, he had said. Just one month. Thirty days. Not that long. It would pass quickly. He’d keep busy with his life—events, rehearsals, a packed schedule.
But it wasn’t passing quickly.
He could have a day full of activities, be surrounded by people, have messages to reply to, events to attend… but every pause, every free second, became a crack through which the thoughts slipped in. And all of them, every single one, had the same name.
Jimmy.
Did he miss him? Yes.
More than he had imagined he would? Yes.
More than he should miss a coworker?
«…Yes.»
Because Jimmy wasn’t just that. Hadn’t been for a long time. He was his friend, his colleague, his partner on tours, on projects, on sets, at concerts… He was the one who looked at him when no one else did, the one who understood him with a single word—or with none. The one who sent him memes at two in the morning and knew exactly how to make him laugh when everything was falling apart.
And lately, he had become something more.
It had started subtly. Afternoons that stretched longer. Silences that didn’t weigh on them. Glances that lasted a bit longer than they should. Jimmy resting his head on his shoulder while they went over scripts. The way he took liberties with his personal space. The way he brushed against him when walking by. The way he laughed with his head tilted, as if looking at him in a way no one else ever did.
And Sea… let him. Waited for it.
Needed it.
It had started as a joke. One of those they made to throw off the fans, to feed the narrative. “They look like a couple,” people would say online. “I wish it were real.” At first, they just laughed. Played along. But over time, the game stopped being just a game.
Because now, every accidental touch burned under his skin. Every smile from Jimmy made him feel exposed. Vulnerable.
Did he like Jimmy?
He didn’t have a clear answer. Or maybe he did, but he didn’t want to admit it. Because admitting it meant opening a door he wasn’t sure he could walk through. He didn’t know what Jimmy felt. He probably saw him as his Nong, his little brother at work. His friend. His confidant. Nothing more.
But Sea felt it. Felt the emptiness of not having him nearby. Felt the exact void Jimmy left in his day, as if his absence pulled the balance out from under him.
He picked up his phone again. He had unlocked it so many times that day he didn’t even need to think about it. There were messages from Jimmy: photos of the places he was visiting, videos of weird Swiss dishes, voice notes with his warm voice telling him what he had bought or what had made him laugh that day.
Each message was like a brief caress. Like a sweet trap. It kept him close… but not close enough.
He opened Instagram.
Went to his profile.
The latest post was from that very morning. Jimmy, in the middle of a beautiful landscape, surrounded by mountains. His smile was serene, genuine. There was something in that image that hit Sea right in the chest.
“He looks so damn good in this photo,” he muttered without thinking, a small crooked smile tugging at his lips.
He shook his head, as if that could chase the thoughts away. Sat up in bed, setting the phone aside, rubbing his face with both hands. His heart was pounding, senselessly.
He couldn’t.
He shouldn’t.
But he missed him.
God, how he missed him.
And deep down, no matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise, he already knew. He had known for a while. Since that time in the dressing room, when Jimmy brushed his cheek with his knuckles. Since he defended him without hesitation at that fanmeeting incident. Since they said goodbye before the airport, and Jimmy hugged him longer than he needed to.
He didn’t know what Jimmy felt. And that was the scariest part.
But a part of him… couldn’t keep pretending this was just about work.
A fleeting idea flashed through his mind, sudden, electric.
«What if I go see him?»
The thought lodged itself without permission, absurd and sudden like a catchy tune. It made him blink. Take a deep breath. Was he actually considering it?
He had ten days off. Ten. A rare luxury. He had carved them out between events and fanmeetings with near-military precision, and now… they were his. Ten days. Free.
«A couple of days in Switzerland…»
Was it crazy?
Yes. It was.
But also… why not?
He let himself fall back on the bed with a sigh that turned into open laughter—clear, a little nervous. One of those laughs that burst out when your mind wanders into dangerously exciting places. He covered his face with both hands, shaking his head.
“What are you thinking, Sea? Have you gone completely insane?”
He stayed there, laughing to himself for a few seconds longer, until the laughter began to fade like foam dissolving into air. Slowly, he lowered his hands, and his gaze, almost without meaning to, searched for the phone again.
He picked it up.
Hesitated for a second. Just one.
Then, opened the flights app. Typed “Bangkok – Zurich.” The options started loading on the screen. Times, prices, layovers. Then came the hotels. Images of cobblestone streets, snow-covered rooftops, warm rooms with big windows. Everything looked so different from what he knew… so far away. So tempting.
And suddenly, the plan didn’t seem that absurd.
Not that crazy.
If he hurried… if he found a good flight…
«I could be there tomorrow.»
His heart began to pound harder.
He placed the phone back on the bed with a soft thud against the sheets. Brought his hands to his face again, trying to bring some order to the chaos inside him.
«No, Sea. You can’t just show up because you miss him. It’s ridiculous, no matter how you look at it. Don’t even think about it.»
But…
«What if…?»
His breathing grew shallow. His pulse wouldn’t stop racing.
He picked up the phone again with trembling hands, as if he wasn’t the one holding it, as if some instinctive part of him had taken over. He stood up.
Checked the flights again. Compared a direct one with a layover in Doha. The direct flight would get him there in fourteen hours. He’d arrive in the late afternoon or evening. Right when Jimmy usually had free time.
And then, without thinking twice…
Tap.
Flight booked.
There was no epic music. No triumphant sound. Just the silence of his room and the screen showing the confirmation.
Flight.
To Zurich.
Tomorrow.
Sea stood still in the middle of the room, staring at his phone as if he didn’t understand what he had just done. As if it weren’t real.
“What the…?” he whispered.
A sweet vertigo swept down his spine, a current born in his stomach that filled his chest with heat. It wasn’t fear. It was… something else. Something more alive. More dangerous.
He wasn’t like this.
He didn’t make impulsive decisions.
He didn’t book international trips in under two minutes on a whim. He planned everything, thought it through, overthought it, stressed over every detail.
And yet… here he was.
He had definitely lost his mind.
But a slow, wide smile spread across his lips.
«I’m going to Jimmy.»
His heart was pounding so hard it felt like it might burst out of his chest. He didn’t know how Jimmy would react—if he’d be surprised, if he’d be happy... if he’d be moved to see him. He didn’t know anything.
He only knew one thing: he was going to see him.
And that, in that moment, was everything.
———・୨ ✦ ୧・———
The cold air of Zurich hit his face as he stepped out of the hotel, but Sea barely noticed. He walked quickly, hands buried deep in his coat pockets, heart thundering like he was running. The streets were clean, adorned with small winter glimmers—lit-up shop windows and that white, opaque sky hanging low over the city.
He had left his suitcase in the hotel room without even looking at it, hadn’t unpacked a thing. He had only glanced at the elevator mirror, adjusted the collar of his coat, and rushed out toward the center where Jimmy was attending his course. According to the schedule Jimmy had mentioned in his messages, he should be about to finish.
Switzerland felt so different from anything he knew. The pace, the air, the way people moved through the streets… But the only thing on his mind was the possibility of seeing Jimmy.
When he arrived, the building appeared in front of him, tall and striking, with a modern glass façade reflecting the gray sky. He stopped a few meters from the entrance, right where students were flowing in and out.
And then, the vertigo.
Like a bucket of cold water down his back, all the excitement that had carried him through the last fourteen hours of flight, through the ride to the hotel, even through the brief walk through the city… vanished. It crumbled like a fragile illusion under the brutal weight of reality.
«What the hell am I going to say? How am I supposed to explain my being here without sounding desperate… or worse, intrusive?»
His chest tightened. His hands felt frozen, not from the weather, but from the anxiety beginning to gnaw at him from within.
«What are you doing, Sea? Did you really think this was a good idea?»
Fear struck him with unexpected violence. The kind of fear that doesn’t scream, but whispers—slow and poisonous.
«This is madness. Real madness. You shouldn’t be here. You should be home. With your dog. Watching a show like a normal person. A sane person. What will Jimmy think? He’ll think you’ve lost your mind. That you’re… weird.»
And the worst question of all:
«What if he’s upset? What if he feels you’re invading his space, his break, his time away?»
He felt a tight knot forming in his throat.
“Shit, Sea… you’re such an idiot,” he muttered under his breath, voice cracked with shame.
He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t just walk in there like it was nothing. Like this wasn’t a completely irrational impulse born from the absurd need to see him, hear him, confirm he wasn’t idealizing him—that he was still himself. Jimmy. Just Jimmy.
«Leave. Just… leave. No one needs to know you came. Stay in the hotel for three days, go sightseeing far away, pretend you came for work or whatever, and then go back.»
Resolved, he turned on his heels. The weight of his self-inflicted humiliation made him walk faster, tenser, as if he could somehow outrun the part of himself that thought this had been a good idea.
But he didn’t get more than three meters away before a voice—warm and confused—reached him from behind.
“Sea?”
The world stopped.
It was just one word. His name. But spoken in that tone. A whisper full of surprise, with a tremor of disbelief he would recognize among a million.
His whole body froze. His heart skipped a beat—then another. His pupils dilated before he even turned his head. His breath left him, as if someone had punched him in the gut.
Jimmy.
He didn’t need to see him to know. That voice, that soft yet deeply emotional way of saying his name, was like a key unlocking all the gates he had tried to keep closed.
He turned slowly, afraid of what he might find on that face… and yet aching for it with overwhelming urgency.
And there he was.
A few steps away, bag slung over his shoulder, a scarf messily wrapped around his neck, hair tousled by the wind… and a look of absolute disbelief painted across his face. Dark eyes wide, like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Like seeing Sea in that place, at that time, was something that could only happen in a dream he wouldn’t dare to have while awake.
“What… what are you doing here?”
Jimmy took one step toward him. Just one. But it felt like the entire world had shrunk around Sea. Like nothing else existed.
Sea swallowed hard. His heart pounded in his ears. He was going to say something—anything—some excuse, a logical explanation… but no words made sense.
So he just smiled. Small. Unsure.
And with a trembling voice, he replied:
“Well…” Sea murmured, glancing down before lifting his eyes again with a vulnerable smile. “You made me jealous.”
Jimmy stood still. His expression changed in a second—but that second felt eternal to them both. Jimmy’s eyes softened, as if Sea’s words had touched something delicate inside him. And then, he smiled. A wide, genuine smile that lit something warm and sweet in Sea’s chest, making him melt inside.
But Sea, even though he felt like he might explode with emotion, managed to keep his composure. He couldn’t let everything he was feeling show on his face. He was already too exposed.
Jimmy parted his lips, as if about to say something else—maybe ask, maybe confess. But he didn’t get the chance.
A voice interrupted, full of a completely different energy.
“Who’s that?” a girl asked, approaching with confident steps. She had to be one of his classmates—and she wasn’t alone. Two more girls joined them, their curious gazes scanning Sea from head to toe.
Sea tensed slightly, but didn’t move.
Jimmy didn’t take his eyes off him either. For a long moment, he kept his gaze fixed on Sea’s, as if refusing to let go of the moment, as if struggling to return to reality. But eventually, inevitably, he turned his face toward his classmate.
He opened his mouth. Closed it again. The silence was heavy between them. And then, finally, with a tone that sounded forced even to his own ears, he said:
“He’s… a coworker.”
Sea forced a smile. It was true. There was no lie in those words. But even so… it hurt.
«It hurts more than it should. It hurts because I hoped… for something else. A nuance. A gesture. A different word. A spark of what we truly are when we’re alone…»
But he said nothing. Just nodded politely, offering a gentle smile.
“I’m Sea. Nice to meet you,” he said softly, bowing his head slightly.
The girl who had asked stared at him wide-eyed, as if suddenly realizing something. She blinked a couple of times, then opened her mouth in surprise.
“Oh! You… you’re—”
But she couldn’t finish the sentence. Jimmy turned to her quickly, as if he’d read what she was about to say before it left her lips, and looked at her with an intensity that made her fall silent. It wasn’t aggressive, but it was firm. A silent warning.
“What time did the professor say we have to be here tomorrow?” Jimmy interrupted smoothly, turning to her with a half-forced smile.
Sea blinked, confused.
«‘You’re…’? I’m what?»
He didn’t have time to wonder further. One of the other girls, more cheerful, grabbed his arm with familiarity.
“We’re all going to dinner. You’re coming with us, right?”
Sea looked at her, then turned his gaze back to Jimmy. The question was simple, but the answer felt incredibly heavy.
Part of him wanted to say no, to get out of there, go back to the hotel and hide under the covers until his dignity completely dissolved.
But another part—the one that had bought that ticket, flown over nine thousand kilometers, and shown up in a foreign city without thinking twice—pushed him to stay.
«You’re already here, Sea. You’re standing in front of him. You didn’t come all this way to stop at the door.»
He nodded slowly.
“Sure,” he replied with a timid smile.
Jimmy smiled wide.
———・୨ ✦ ୧・———
Dinner took place in a cozy restaurant, a perfect blend of modern and rustic, with warm lights hanging in garlands from the ceiling and the soft murmur of conversation all around. The stone walls and wooden beams gave the place an almost intimate feel despite the chatter. Sea sat across from Jimmy, locking eyes with him for a few seconds before looking away and pretending to be interested in a menu he had already read three times.
The girls spoke naturally, laughing together, sharing anecdotes from the course, telling little stories from their day in the city. Sea tried to keep up, joining in with a light joke or two, talking about the chaotic but routine week in Bangkok: the photo shoots, the interview with that clumsy journalist, and an event that had made him more nervous than usual.
And although it seemed like a group conversation, with comments flowing easily, Sea couldn’t shake the undercurrent pulling him toward Jimmy.
Jimmy… had barely taken his eyes off him.
Even as he replied to the girls, laughed, or nodded at others’ comments, his gaze kept drifting back to Sea. He looked at him as if trying to memorize him, as if convinced this was all a dream and he didn’t want it to vanish.
«Is he aware of how obvious he is? Of the knot he’s tying in my stomach just by looking at me like that?»
Sea lowered his eyes to the table, trying to pull himself together. Every time he caught Jimmy staring, Jimmy didn’t look away. On the contrary, he stayed still, as if challenging him to hold the gaze. But Sea always ended up surrendering.
When his plate arrived, the conversation around the table continued naturally. Sea looked at the dish with confusion, which quickly turned into concern: Shrimp.
His stomach clenched.
He was about to politely call the waiter, explain his allergy, and ask for something else, when suddenly, without a word, Jimmy reached out from across the table and slid his own plate toward him, swapping it with uncanny ease.
Sea looked at him, puzzled.
Jimmy didn’t speak at first. He wasn’t even looking at him. But then, slowly, he lifted his gaze. And his eyes—so intense yet warm—locked with Sea’s.
“My dish doesn’t have anything that’ll hurt you,” he murmured softly, like a secret shared just between them. “I already checked. You can eat it safely.”
Sea’s heart skipped a beat. It wasn’t just the gesture. It was the effortless way he’d done it. The complete absence of showmanship. The fact that he hadn’t even waited for a “thank you.”
That was just how he was. Jimmy was like that. Always attentive. Always looking out for him in the little details no one else noticed, as if he were watching over him without needing to say a word.
“Thank you…” Sea whispered, barely audible, as if afraid to break the spell.
He then noticed the girls’ glances—some with barely contained smiles, others exchanging quick looks among themselves. The moment hadn’t gone unnoticed. Embarrassed, Sea looked down and focused on cutting a piece of food, trying to seem normal. It was normal. It had to be. It was just Jimmy… just his coworker.
But it wasn’t. At least not for him.
Dinner continued without incident, though to Sea, it felt like he was trapped in a bubble where only Jimmy and the invisible tension between them existed. From time to time, they talked about trivial things: a new movie, the weather in Switzerland, the differences with Thailand. But every response from Jimmy felt aimed at him, as if everything else was just an excuse to prolong the silent conversation happening in their glances.
The words floated in the air, but another dialogue was unfolding in the pauses.
«Why did you come?»
«Are you happy to see me?»
«Did you miss me?»
Sea didn’t know if those questions were in Jimmy’s mind or just his own. But there was something in the way Jimmy looked at him, something that told him he wasn’t the only one feeling this way. That maybe… just maybe, there was something more.
When dinner ended, no one seemed in a hurry to leave. They stayed a little longer, chatting, laughing, sharing silly comments and thoughts about the city. But between sentences, Sea and Jimmy exchanged furtive glances.
Jimmy leaned forward slightly, elbows on the table, watching him like he wanted to say something—as if the words were about to slip out.
But he said nothing.
———・୨ ✦ ୧・———
After dinner, when the empty plates had been cleared and the conversations became more scattered, Jimmy—with a mix of excitement and something like impatience—insisted several times that Sea join him for a walk by the lake. He wouldn’t take “no” for an answer. He claimed he couldn’t let him leave without showing him “the best part of the city.”
Sea protested gently, more out of habit than conviction. Deep down, he wanted to extend the night. To stretch out the time by his side. To prolong the spell.
Jimmy’s coworkers politely excused themselves, saying they were tired and preferred to return to the residence. There were hugs, air kisses, and promises to see each other the next day. One of the girls gave Sea a look he couldn’t quite interpret—a mix of mischief and complicity—but he didn’t want to think too much about it. Not tonight.
Once they were alone, there was a brief silence between them. One of those soft, comfortable silences where words weren’t necessary yet. Jimmy shoved his hands into his jacket pockets and began walking slowly. Sea followed.
The walk to the lake was calm, unhurried, wrapped in the serenity of a city gradually dimming into warm lights and distant murmurs. The night air was fresh, the kind of breeze that wasn’t quite cold but still made you huddle into your coat. Sea walked with his hands in his pockets, senses alert, as if trying to absorb everything: the sound of footsteps on the pavement, the orange glow of the streetlamps filtering through the trees, Jimmy’s silhouette beside him—just a step away.
When they finally reached the lakefront path, Sea stopped, unable to help himself.
The water, black and silent, reflected the city lights with a flickering shimmer. In the distance, small boats were docked, unmoving, and beyond them, the mountains cut dark shapes against the starry sky. The scene felt unreal. As if they had stepped into a painting.
Sea took a deep breath.
“It’s beautiful…” he murmured, almost to himself.
Jimmy turned to look at him but said nothing. He just watched as Sea lifted his eyes to the sky and then let them glide over the lake’s surface, as if trying to memorize every corner.
They kept walking, now more slowly, as if both of them knew the moment shouldn’t be rushed.
They didn’t speak. But it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was a charged silence, expectant, as if each step brought them closer not just to the end of the walk… but to something else.
It was Jimmy who finally broke it, his voice low but direct—like tossing a stone into a still pond:
“What are you doing here, Sea?”
Sea felt his heart stop in his chest.
The question had been simple, but Jimmy’s tone, his eyes as he asked it, made it something more. Something unavoidable. And Sea wasn’t ready. Not really.
He tried to answer. Opened his mouth, but the words caught in his throat. He closed his lips, pressing them together, feeling the tension creep up his spine. He looked toward the lake, avoiding his gaze.
Jimmy spoke again, his voice so soft it chilled Sea’s skin.
“Did you… come to see me?”
Sea stopped. Slowly, he turned to face him.
Jimmy had stopped too. He was looking straight at him, with that piercing intensity that seemed to undress him without a single touch. His eyes held no judgment, only a raw, unfiltered honesty. He was there, open, waiting for the truth.
Sea swallowed hard.
Yes.
Yes, he had come for him.
Yes, he had missed him with a force he hadn’t known how to contain.
Yes, he had crossed half the world just to spend a few minutes by his side.
But he couldn’t say it.
And yet, he couldn’t lie either.
He was stuck in between. In that exact point between the urge to run and the desire to stay. Between fear… and love.
His lips parted slightly, as if to speak. But he didn’t.
Jimmy didn’t push. He didn’t step forward. He didn’t fill the silence with unnecessary words. He just looked at him. Waited.
Sea dropped his gaze for a moment, unable to hold Jimmy’s any longer.
The wind blew gently, rustling the tree branches, carrying with it a dry leaf that floated between them, as if it, too, had something to say.
Jimmy started walking again, with that calm, carefree stride of his—as if the night wasn’t weighing on him, as if he hadn’t just asked a question capable of breaking Sea open. He turned slightly over his shoulder and, with a mischievous smile, said softly:
“What’s the matter… did you miss me so much you just couldn’t stay away?”
He said it playfully, like a joke. An attempt to lighten the moment, to retreat into the safe zone of humor. But it wasn’t a joke for Sea. It couldn’t be.
Because Sea didn’t move.
He stood there, frozen. His chest rose and fell in an erratic rhythm. His heart pounded fiercely, like it might leap from his throat. Blood roared in his ears. An invisible pressure had taken root in his chest, making it hard to breathe.
Jimmy stopped when he noticed Sea was no longer behind him. He turned around curiously… and when he saw his face, he took two quick steps toward him.
"Hey, Sea… it was a joke, I know you wouldn’t—" he began to say, lowering his voice, his expression softened by concern.
But Sea interrupted him. Not with shouting. Not with desperation.
With a word.
Just one.
"Yes."
His voice trembled, torn, but it sounded like a confession long held back. He forced himself to look up, to meet Jimmy’s eyes, though his lashes quivered.
"I came to see you."
Jimmy’s expression changed. His smile disappeared instantly. Something stirred beneath the surface, as if he were trying to grasp the magnitude of what he had just heard.
Sea saw him blink once. Then again. He was looking at him like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
But Sea couldn’t stop now.
The words, kept inside for days—weeks—were piling up, pushing to be released. His heart spoke louder than reason. And he didn’t have the strength to hold it back.
"I missed you so much, Jimmy," he said with a broken, rushed voice. "You can’t imagine how much. Even though I’ve been busy working, even though I tried to distract myself with a thousand things… all I could think about was you. What you might be doing. How long until I could see you again..."
He felt the tears burning his eyes, clouding his vision. He struggled to breathe, but he didn’t stop speaking.
"I missed your jokes… your smile… looking at you, talking to you…" he tried to swallow, but a knot had formed in his throat, "Touching you. Being near you, even if you said nothing. Jimmy, I… I…"
But the sentence remained suspended.
«Shut up, Sea. What are you doing?»
«Do you want Jimmy to never speak to you again?»
The voice in his head was so fierce it took his breath away. The words died on his lips.
And suddenly, it was all too much.
Too real. Too vulnerable. Too risky.
The adrenaline that had pushed him there vanished like a dream. Vertigo took hold of him. His legs shook. His breathing turned chaotic. And fear—that familiar fear—came back strong.
«What have I done?»
He brought a hand to his chest, as if he could contain everything overflowing inside him. He lowered his gaze, unable to meet Jimmy’s eyes. The tears began to fall, unbidden, uncontrolled, sliding down his cheeks with painful gentleness.
He looked at his own hands—open, trembling, helpless. As if in them, he could see his clumsiness, his mistake, his heart offered without armor.
He hated himself for saying it. For exposing himself. For giving too much.
He said nothing more. He couldn’t.
He stood there, head down, half-breathing, shaking, crying in silence under the dim lights of the promenade.
Sea hadn’t come there to say all that.
«Then… Why did you come?»
The question rang in his head with overwhelming clarity, as if he suddenly realized he could no longer escape from himself.
Jimmy was still in front of him. He didn’t move. He didn’t speak. His silence wrapped around everything. But Sea felt his gaze burning through him, even without seeing it. And that overwhelmed him even more.
"Sea… you what? Go on," asked Jimmy, stepping closer, closing the little distance left between them.
His voice didn’t sound angry. Just… soft. Steady. As if he were afraid to break something that was already close to shattering.
Sea lowered his head further, curling more into himself. He couldn’t. He couldn’t answer. Everything inside him was chaos. He shook his head clumsily, a silent, desperate refusal. His throat was tight and his eyes full of tears. He wanted to disappear, swallowed by the ground, dissolved into the air.
"Sea," Jimmy repeated more firmly, "look at me."
The tone made his body tense. And then he felt a touch. Jimmy’s warm fingers, firm but gentle, took his chin, guiding it upward with a tenderness that broke down his defenses even more.
Sea kept his eyes closed, trembling. He couldn’t face Jimmy’s gaze. Not if he was going to find rejection there. Not if, after breaking himself open like that, all he would receive was pity.
Then he felt the pad of Jimmy’s thumb slide across his cheek, wiping away the escaped tear. The hand remained there, warming his skin, holding his face as if it were something precious, as if he wasn’t going to let it fall.
And then… Jimmy rested his forehead against his.
Sea kept his eyes closed. He didn’t dare open them, but his breathing began to calm just from the warmth of that contact. From the way Jimmy didn’t pull away.
"Sea… you… what?… Tell me" Jimmy whispered, almost a murmur. His deep, broken voice caressed the air between them.
Sea swallowed hard, feeling his heart shrink.
«That’s it. You can’t go back. If you say it, if you really say it… everything will change.»
But something in Jimmy’s touch, in that steady presence, pushed him to cross that line. He couldn’t keep lying to himself.
"I… I…" his voice cracked, but he didn’t retreat. He inhaled as best he could. "I… I’m in love with you."
The world stopped.
For a second, everything was suspended. The lake, the sky, the lights reflected in the water—everything disappeared.
And then Jimmy kissed him.
It wasn’t a wild kiss, nor an explosion. It was a slow, careful, warm kiss. As if their lips had been searching for each other for too long, as if they recognized each other in the touch. The first brush was barely a breath, but it was enough to make Sea shiver all over.
He felt air return to his lungs all at once, the pressure in his chest finally lifting. Jimmy’s warmth enveloped him. The world seemed to ignite. It was like his blood boiled in his veins.
Trembling, Sea lifted his hands and placed them on Jimmy’s waist, clutching his coat, afraid that if he let go, Jimmy would vanish too.
The kiss lingered for a few more seconds, soft, ethereal, until Jimmy slowly pulled back, as if he didn’t want to break the moment completely.
Sea kept his eyes closed, unable to move, unwilling to face the possibility that it had been a mirage. A gift from his broken imagination.
Then he heard his voice. Low. Velvety.
"Took you long enough to realize…" Jimmy murmured, with a tenderness that brushed against Sea’s heart.
Sea opened his eyes slowly, the fear still lodged in his throat.
And he saw him.
Jimmy was smiling at him. A soft, trembling, emotional smile. His eyes sparkled under the lamplight. His gaze held no trace of mockery, or doubt, or distance.
"I love you, Sea."
The words hit him like a warm wave. He couldn’t think. He couldn’t respond. Because before he could even process it, Jimmy took his face in both hands, and this time, he kissed him with everything.
There was no more softness. No more restraint.
The second kiss was deep. Urgent. A confession in itself. Jimmy’s lips moved against his with a mixture of passion and relief, of need held back for days, weeks—maybe months. As if they couldn’t make up for lost time, as if they had to say everything all at once—with their mouths, with their bodies.
Sea responded without thinking, letting himself be carried away by that intensity. He embraced Jimmy as if he never wanted anything or anyone to take him away from him again. The night’s chill faded behind them. Only they existed. Only their bodies, entwined at the edge of a lakeside path, while the city slept and love, at last, was spoken without fear.
The first kiss had saved him.
The second… had set him on fire.
The kiss gradually lost intensity, like a flame that doesn’t go out all at once but becomes glowing embers, warm and lasting. Jimmy brushed Sea’s lips one last time before pulling away just a few centimeters—just enough to look at him. His breath was unsteady, but his eyes were calm, full of tenderness.
Sea felt his pulse racing, his chest pounding hard. And yet, for the first time in a long time, he also felt peace. As if he had finally stopped running. As if, at last, what he had been searching for all along was right in front of him. In him.
Jimmy leaned his forehead against his again, closing his eyes for a moment, as if he wanted to memorize the moment, carve it into his skin, his memory, the depths of his soul.
"Thank you for coming…" he whispered, barely audible, his voice ragged with emotion. "You have no idea how much I needed it."
Sea smiled, his eyes still shining. He felt vulnerable, exposed—but also incredibly alive. The wind brushed his face, like a knowing whisper.
"I didn’t even know it myself," he answered honestly. "But now… now I can’t imagine having done anything else."
Jimmy stared at him, as if he couldn’t believe Sea was really there. He caressed his cheek with the back of his fingers, with a devotion that made Sea’s chest tighten.
"I’ve missed you so much," Jimmy confessed. "I’ve felt incomplete without you. Like I was only half-alive… unable to enjoy anything fully."
Sea nodded, understanding every word. Because he had felt the same. He had felt it even when pretending to be fine, when hiding in his routines. Jimmy had always been missing.
They stood in silence for a few more seconds, facing each other, holding on with their eyes. No more masks. No more fear. Only an invisible bond that had become unbreakable.
And then Sea, with a slight blush coloring his cheeks, lowered his gaze for a moment before lifting it again with a timid smile. His voice was soft, almost shy… but firm.
"My hotel is really close to here," he said, not needing to add anything else. His heart was pounding like a drum in his chest. "If you want… we could go."
Jimmy didn’t answer right away. He just looked at him. His eyes softened even more, and a slow, warm smile spread across his lips.
"Yes," he said at last, with a tenderness that struck deep. "I want to."
And so they began to walk together, slowly, very close, their hands brushing shyly, like two teenagers discovering something for the first time.
The night wrapped around them. And although the world kept turning,
for them, everything else had fallen away.
Only the now remained.
And what began… was the beginning of an Us.
THE END.