Work Text:
please realize. lying to you is the hardest thing i've had to do and ever will have to do. it protects you. if it was simply me, i'd tell you everything. in great detail. i'd let you play your little hero complex out to completion. but it would get you killed. i won't let that happen. you will not die because of something i tell you. i will keep you close. closer than any i have ever. please realize. this is the most intimate i have ever been with someone. that what we have means more to me than any singular relationship in my life. all of them are lies. even ours. can you see that i'm real with you. more real than i am with anyone else? can you feel it when i look at you? when i tell you the most absurd story, can you read what is behind my eyes. that woman that still knows what love is. she can be seen when i speak to you. in private. even out there. she's there. i hope you know i'd let the world burn in favor of letting you live and love peacefully. i can't give that to you. yet, i give you every piece of myself i have to spare. every shard left unscorned is yours and only yours. i will never allow someone to see me vulnerable. only you. it's all i have to offer. all i have left. every part of me is elsewise owned. by this corporation or that one. i don't want any of them. i want freedom. it's out of reach. but you are here just within reach. always an arms length away. i will not let them take you from me. i will not allow myself to get so close to put you in danger. i will always watch you. i will always keep you safe. i will. always. love. you.