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Published:
2025-06-29
Updated:
2025-09-15
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2,355
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2/?
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Yellow’s Guide To Having Ex-Terrorist Parents

Summary:

After AvM 6, Yellow winds up in the Outernet. Four months later, they get ‘surprise adopted.’

Notes:

i crave more content of yellow and chosen/dark, but nobody makes that content, so i’m doing it myself

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: “Is it still kidnapping if the kid doesn’t have parents?”

Summary:

Yellow has no idea who Chosen and Dark are.

Notes:

love it when i’m awake at 5am bc i decided i’d rather write than sleep

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Four months ago Yellow had discovered command blocks in Minecraft. This has caused Yellow to be trapped in the Outernet and has been widely regarded as a bad move.

They jested to themself, but every time they looked up at the sky, they remembered that their friends probably thought they were dead (if they had even survived the incident themselves). After a command block had been struck by lightning, it had caused a chain reaction where all of the command blocks began to glitch out, affecting the entire PC. Orange had attempted to reboot the computer, but at some point, some unknown error had occurred that unexpectedly booted Yellow into the Outernet, far away from their home, from their friends.

For the past four months, they had been barely getting by, taking a job that barely paid enough to get Yellow into the cheapest, shittiest apartment ever. Their employment was built on a very basic lie about their age (saying they were sixteen when they were really thirteen in stick years), but nobody had any way of verifying that, as far as Yellow knew.

Speaking of their job, though, they were taking the trash out back when a green laser blew up an entire hill.

Curiosity got the better of them, so they lied to their boss and said that the event had freaked them out. Thankfully, their boss was understanding and let them clock out early. Of course, instead of going home, they went to see what the laser had hit. (If only they’d gone towards the laser‘s source instead of its target…)

When Yellow finished biking to the site the beam had hit, they couldn’t help but be impressed by the damage it had done. Of course it wasn’t a good thing, but damn it if it wasn’t interesting. They always had a weakness for interesting things.

Wait, was that—

Their hope disappeared as quickly as it had come into existence, realizing that this hollowhead was red, and not orange like they had initially perceived them to be. (They were probably colorblind to some extent, but that was a thought for another day.) They would have just turned away if they hadn’t realized how badly the red hollowhead was injured. Were they even alive? They certainly weren’t moving at all.

They were just about to approach the stick when they noticed another hollowhead with fire powers (holy shit???) landing next to the other. Immediately, they ducked down, barely peeking over the edge of the crater.

“Dark,” the black hollowhead quietly spoke, “I can see you breathing.”

The other mumbled something Yellow couldn’t make out, but their tone sounded almost… mournful.

“…You have a point. After everything you’ve done, I shouldn’t care whether you live or die.” Those words carried so much ice that Yellow felt a shiver down their spine, and they weren’t even who the words were directed towards. “Those were children you killed, Dark. I thought even you had your limits.”

Dark muttered something else, but it seemed like the other wasn’t able to pick up what they had said any better than Yellow could.

“Look, I get that you just got your shit kicked in, but you’re going to have to speak up.”

Dark attempted to shoot upright, screaming, “I SAID I FUCKING KN—AGH!!” They dropped back down to the ground in pain, and the other hollowhead almost moved to catch them, but they restrained themself. “Fuck…”

“…Then why?”

“…Don’t… don’t act like you’re so innocent, Chosen,” Dark hissed out. “We both contributed to all the attacks. You enjoyed it… at least, I-I thought…”

Chosen stared blankly at the injured Dark, not saying a word. Dark seemed to be able to read Chosen’s expression, though, and said something that once again, Yellow couldn’t make out. Chosen seemed to be pretty receptive to it, tenderly picking up Dark, who winced at the movement of their body.

“Just to be clear, I’m still pissed,” Chosen warned. “I’m only helping you because if I didn’t, people would think I killed you.”

“And… and you would be lonely…” Dark teased back. Chosen didn’t seem all that amused.

“You’re entirely replaceable to me.”

“Oh yeah? By… by who?”

Chosen turned to look at Yellow, and that was when they realized they had fucked up.

“By our little spectator over there, maybe.”

“Our wha—Cho, how long… have they been there?”

“Yeah, you up there, I saw you when I landed,” Chosen told Yellow, approaching them with Dark still in their arms. “What are you planning to do? Report us to the cops?”

“Wh—No, I-I-I wasn’t p-planning on doing a-anything,” Yellow stammered, standing up and backing away. “I-I just—I wanted to see what happened, and—”

“So you decided to eavesdrop? You must be either clueless or suicidal.” Flames shot from the soles of Chosen’s feet, bringing them back into the air, and their eyes began to glow red menacingly. “Do you know who we are?”

“N-no, I’ve only been here for four months, and—”

“Really, Cho? Threatening children… after you just chewed me out for it?” Dark criticized.

“…Wait, that’s a kid?”

Offended, Yellow snapped back, “I’m thir—sixteen, for your information!”

Dark had the audacity to laugh at that response. It was a weak laugh, but a laugh nonetheless. “Haha, who… who are you fooling?”

“Chosen, clearly,” Yellow retorted, crossing their arms indignantly. “And my landlord and my boss.”

“…You mean your parents, right?” Chosen asked, sounding concerned.

“No. I mean my landlord and my boss.”

That earned them stares from both hollowheads.

“…What?”

Chosen was the first to reply. “You said you’re thirteen?”

“That’s not what my ID says.”

“Identity fraud at… at thirteen, I like this kid,” Dark said enthusiastically. “Maybe they can replace me.”

“Hey, kid, how much do you know about spiders?” Chosen jokingly questioned. These two really could switch their moods quickly, huh?

“…I’ve been told I’m a quick learner,” Yellow responded. They knew nothing about spiders, but they could definitely become proficient in spider knowledge in a matter of hours. That was how the command block incident had happened, after all.

“Cho, you’re not… you’re not actually thinking of replacing me… right?”

“No, but… is it still kidnapping if the kid doesn’t have parents?”

“Not what that word means,” Yellow said, before realizing the implications. “…Wait, what—”

Before they knew it, Chosen had picked them and their bike up as well, flying off into the distance with Yellow and Dark in their arms.

Yellow had a feeling they weren’t getting out of this.

Notes:

surely being surprise adopted by the outernet’s most dysfunctional couple will have no consequences on yellow’s mental health :)

Chapter 2: “Hey, whose turn is it to ask a question right now?”

Summary:

Yellow makes a deal with Dark to learn more about them.

Notes:

MOTIVATION IS BACK BITCHES
AVA12 FUCKED UP MANY OF MY HEADCANONS BUT IT’S OKAY BECAUSE I HAVE NEW ONES *is coping so fucking hard right now*
oh yeah spoilers for ava12 in this chapter

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

It had been three days since Yellow had been ‘adopted’ by Chosen. In those three days, they had learned quite a few things about the two hollowheads they were now stuck with. For example, Chosen and Dark had had a major disagreement over something. They didn’t know what, exactly but it probably had something to do with why Dark killed those kids (who were apparently later revived, as Chosen had told Yellow to reassure them).

They were currently writing down a list of things they knew about each hollowhead as individuals.

Chosen:

  • (Ex)terrorist (according to themself)
  • Cool powers (ask more about this later)
  • Can open their face up like Pac Man
  • Likes to eat random garbage
  • Favorite meal(?) is thorn (the archaic letter)
  • Likes birdwatching
  • Collects rocks

Dark:

  • (Ex)terrorist (Chosen made them agree to this)
  • Probably knows a lot about spiders

As hard as they tried to come up with anything else for Dark, they were only drawing blanks. Therefore, they immediately decided that they needed to learn as much about the red hollowhead as possible.

Currently, Dark was propped up with pillows on the tattered and burnt living room couch, typing away on their laptop. They noticed Yellow approaching them, though, and closed the device.

“What do you want?” they grumbled, gripping the laptop tightly.

“To know more about you,” Yellow admitted. There was no point in lying to them; besides, honesty would get Yellow further.

Dark stared at Yellow, looking completely flabbergasted. “…Why?”

Yellow showed Dark the list. “See how your part is empty, aside from something Chosen made you agree to and an educated guess? I want to fill it up.”

The red hollowhead still wasn’t convinced. “…What are you planning to use this information for?”

The teen shrugged. “I just like knowing things.”

Dark paused, probably to consider the request. They ended up replying, “I’ll make you a deal. For every question you ask me, you have to answer one about yourself.”

“That sounds fair,” Yellow agreed. They took a moment to think about their first question. “…Do you like Minecraft?” It wasn’t the best question, but it might allow them to get a general read on Dark’s interests.

“The block game? Yeah, Chosen and I had fun with it the one time we were there. They mostly ended up making stuff while I went to a cool fire place and killed a bunch of idiots.”

“You’ve been to the Nether?” Yellow commented, writing the information down. When they were in the PC, none of the group had actually been to the Nether. They’d read a bit about it, but they all decided they would rather avoid the fire. Besides, they’d had the Minecraft icon to get any blocks or items they needed.

“Is that what it’s called?” Dark hummed. “Anyway, my turn to ask a question. Why lie about your age?”

Well, that wasn’t exactly the first question Yellow wanted to answer, but they had made a deal with Dark. “I wouldn’t have been able to get an apartment or a job if I said my actual age.” It was a miracle that they had even gotten either of those in the first place, let alone both. “What happened between you and Chosen that pissed them off so much?”

Dark hesitated for a moment, before letting out a sigh. “Communication issues. I assumed too much, they clarified too little. Turns out, they don’t enjoy destruction as much as I do. Thinking about it, the whole Minecraft thing was probably the catalyst for that.” They opened their laptop back up and resumed typing. Maybe they were also taking notes on this conversation? “What happened to your parents or whatever?”

“I’m from a website. My friends and I don’t have parents.” The closest would have been Alan, but he mostly just interacted with Orange. “A… glitch happened, and I got stuck here in the Outernet.”

“Damn, the universe hates you, huh?” Dark chuckled, though that quickly descended into a brief coughing fit. “Ugh… word of advice, taking a laser beam to the chest is not fun.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Yellow nodded. On the topic of laser beams… “Do you have powers like Chosen does?”

“Yeah, I do,” Dark confirmed. “Mine are more explosive than theirs, and yes, I do mean that literally, but we have pretty similar powers overall, though Chosen’s powers are a lot more diverse than mine.” 

“Like they spread out their skill points rather than pouring them all into one thing?”

“…What the hell does that mean?”

“You know, like a video game? You can use points to upgrade your skills.” Yellow elaborated, but the only response they got from Dark was a confused look. “What, you’ve never played a video game with a skill tree before?”

“Hey, whose turn is it to ask a question right now?”

“You asked what I meant by skill points, I answered, it is in fact my turn to ask a question. In fact, I’d even say you owe me an extra question now.”

“One could say that you asking for clarification by comparing my powers to skill points counts as a question, so it’s my turn.” Yellow didn’t really have a good argument against that, so they let Dark speak. “Why aren’t you afraid of me and Chosen?”

“Why would I be?”

“One of the things you already knew about us is that we both used to be terrorists.” That was a good point; Yellow probably should have been afraid of the ex-terrorists. “And sure, you were spooked when Cho threatened to kick your ass, but you recovered pretty quickly when I called you out for being a kid.”

“…I don’t really have a good… uh…” Yellow noticed that the hollowhead’s hand had darkened to pitch black. “…What’s up with your hand?”

“What do you—” By the time Dark looked at their hand, something had started to drip from it. “…Uh. Not a goddamn clue.” The… whatever it was landed on the couch cushion beside them. “You should, um, probably get Chosen.”

Yellow turned around and began climbing the creaking stairs to the second floor, calling out, “Chosen?! Something’s up with Dark’s hand!”

“Can it wait?” Chosen groaned loudly from wherever they were. “I’m eating!”

“No, it can’t!”

Yellow heard a door open and close, and Chosen appeared at the top of the stairs. “What’s going on?”

Yellow motioned for the black hollowhead to follow, and led them back to Dark.

“Oh, good, you’re back,” Dark waved with their non-dripping hand. “In the thirty seconds you were gone, I figured out that I can probably control this stuff.”

“Control what—Dark, holy shit, your hand is melting.”

“If you wanna call it that, sure,” Dark shrugged. The substance on the couch definitely seemed to react to the movement of their hand. “It doesn’t hurt or anything. Otherwise, I would’ve noticed a lot sooner.

“Anyway, kid, my turn again,” Dark reminded Yellow. “Can’t believe I didn’t think of this sooner, but what the hell is—”

“Dark, we should focus on fixing whatever the hell this is,” Chosen asserted, gesturing to the substance. “Kid, you can go do whatever it is you do.”

Yellow decided that they probably shouldn’t piss off the hollowhead by insisting that they continue asking Dark questions. “…Okay.” They took their notebook, heading into the kitchen and writing down a few more notes about Dark.

Wait, what was Dark going to ask them, anyway?

Eh, that could wait a while. They were just happy they had learned things about the hollowheads at all.

Notes:

i know what dark was going to ask, but i want to see y’all’s theories :)

Notes:

thank you for reading! please let me know if there are any mistakes, i finished this at 5am