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***
Taehyung swept into the bookstore, his assistant Sara hurrying behind him. A store manager led them to a display that prominently showcased Taehyung’s latest book, “Five Points: New York City’s Rogue History,” atop a pyramid of copies of the book. An employee had hand-lettered a card that read, New York Times #1 Non-Fiction bestseller, by the iconic Taehyung Kim, Ph. D.”
“Very nice,” said Sara, Taehyung's publicist, smiling at the manager. “Isn’t it nice, Taehyung?”
Taehyung didn’t reply. His attention was on the next table, containing a similar book pyramid, “Guilty by Association, the newest thriller from New York Times #1 Fiction bestselling author Jungkook Jeon.”
He whirled, nostrils flaring in anger.
“Who had the bright idea to put his book next to mine?”
The bookstore manager laughed nervously.
“Err… we thought they would offset each other – the current number one non-fiction and fiction books next to each other.”
Taehyung glared at Sara.
“Did you or did you not tell bookstores to keep my books far away from that – that – heathen’s?” he demanded.
Sara rolled her eyes.
“Lighten up, Tae. Jungkook isn’t your competition. I’ve told you that a thousand times.”
Taehyung sniffed and tossed his unruly blonde curls.
“I know he’s not my competition. But he’s despicable and doesn’t deserve to be placed anywhere near me, whether in person or in book form!”
He whirled on the manager.
“Change this setup or I will cancel my book signing tonight,” he demanded.
Sara rolled her eyes again.
She started to speak, but the manager cut in, “Anything you want, Dr. Kim.”
He hurried away to grab an employee to help move Jungkook’s book display several tables beyond Taehyung’s book table.
“Seriously, Tae,” Sara sighed, “how long are you going to keep up this fight with Jungkook?”
“Fight? Who’s fighting?” Taehyung sniffed.
Another employee hurried up to lead him and Sara over to the signing area, where two large boxes of books lay waiting for Taehyung’s autograph. Fifty chairs were arranged in rows facing the table, and Taehyung knew each chair was reserved. He’d have a full house waiting to hear him read from and discuss the rogue gangs that ruled Manhattan’s Five Points neighborhood in the 19th century. He’d dressed for the occasion, in a black suit from the era, a ruffled white shirt, and boots. His top hat sat on the table.
He heard a commotion from the front of the store and saw a line forming for the event, mostly women. Well, mostly older women who fawned over Taehyung’s beauty, cat eyes of amber fringed with long lashes, sharp nose, and full lips that spread into a boxy smile. His blonde mop was always styled to look as though he’d just rolled out of bed.
A woman his mother’s age caught his eye and waved. Taehyung flashed his trademark boxy smile and waved back. He could almost bet she’d buy several copies of his book, either for her adult children or her book club friends.
He turned and settled behind the table, nodding graciously to an employee who placed a cup of ginger tea at his elbow. Sara looked him over and gave him a thumbs up sign before turning and waving to another employee to bring in the fans. They’d receive an autographed copy of the book, then take their seats in the audience for the reading and discussion.
Taehyung knew he was a big deal but he truly loved meeting and chatting with his readers. He took a sip of tea and held out his hands to the first reader in line, smiling.
***
Jungkook posted a photo on Instagram showing a copy of his latest novel, “Guilty by Association” next to a highball glass holding two fingers of whiskey. He captioned it “My new novel is out! Pour a drink and enjoy!”
He scrolled through his timeline, liking a few fan posts gushing about the book. He knew how much of a thrill it gave them to be noticed by their favorite author. He stopped at one photo showing workers moving a stack of his books to a table farther back from the front door of a bookshop. The table next to it prominently held Taehyung Kim’s latest boring history tome. He caught a glimpse of Taehyung and two people standing nearly out of frame, and snorted. The snob must have pitched a hissy fit and demanded Jungkook’s book be moved to the back of the line. The photo was captioned, “What’s the deal with Dr. Taehyung Kim and Jungkook Jeon? Definitely a mystery to be unraveled.”
On a whim, Jungkook added a comment: “No mystery. Just a case of insecurity from the good doctor. Not a real doctor, BTW. He can’t save your life but he could write your obit.”
He snickered and exited the app. He was about to toss the phone on the table when it buzzed with a text.
Jin:
Kookie! I see you saw that bookstore photo. Are you pissed?
JK: Pissed? As if!
Jini:
What’s his problem, anyway?
JK: No clue. Maybe he wants me.
Jini:
LOL!!! See ya soon.
JK: K.
Jungkook tossed his phone on the coffee table and glanced at the clock. Taehyung’s book signing was scheduled to start in half an hour, and he just happened to be in the same city. Grinning, Jungkook stood and grabbed his key card. Shoving it into his pocket, he left his dreary room. He had the perfect way to relieve his boredom—and fuck up Taehyung’s perfect event.
***
Taehyung finished reading the first chapter, then closed the book, placing large, slender hands atop the cover. He smiled at the audience, who smiled back. He swore two middle-aged women in the back actually swooned. Who swoons in this day and age? He gave them an extra sweet smile and they swooned again. He fought the urge to roll his eyes.
“I understand some of you have questions. Sara?”
His publicist walked through the seats, stopping next to a woman with short, gray hair and thick glasses. When she stood, she towered over Sara, who stood 5’8”. Taehyung tilted his head and gave her an inquisitive smile.
“Yes, dear?”
“Thank you for taking my question, Dr. Kim!” she gushed. “I’m descended from the leader of one of the Five Point gangs and my family is so thrilled to see her brought to life so colorfully in your book!”
Taehyung smiled knowingly.
“Was your relative, by any chance, the infamous Hell-Cat Maggie?”
“Yes she was!” the woman answered proudly.
Taehyung winked and asked, cheekily, “Are you as wild as your ancestor?”
She blushed furiously and waved at him before sitting down.
He spent the next hour answering questions and bantering with the audience, which turned out to be very lively. One woman asked whether he read any fiction.
“I enjoy a good mystery. My current favorite novelist is Val McDermid. I enjoy her Tony Hill / Carol Jordan mysteries. A bit gruesome but well crafted.”
An excited buzz ran through the crowd and Taehyung smiled as he saw women typing Val McDermid’s name into their phones. Another woman called out, “What about Jungkook Jeon? Do you like his books?”
Taehyung scoffed internally but managed to hold a placid smile.
“I find Jungkook Jeon’s mysteries to be a bit on the tedious side.”
“I could say the same for your dusty tomes,” a deep voice piped up from behind the audience.
Taehyung’s head whipped up to meet the insolent gaze of Jungkook Jeon. He was leaning against a bookcase, holding a copy of Taehyung’s Five Points book. He yawned hugely, waved the book, and said, “Thanks, Tae. This will help me get to sleep more quickly tonight.”
Inside, Taehyung seethed, but he kept his outward expression calm. Smiling faintly, he quipped, “Would you like me to autograph it for you? I’m happy to write a ‘Sweet Dreams’ message.”
Jungkook’s dark eyes twinkled as he slowly walked through the audience to where Taehyung stood. Taehyung’s face heated as the novelist slowly looked him up and down, involuntary chills and heat spreading through his body.
Taehyung picked up a flier and fanned himself, hoping he looked bored, rather than unsettled. He turned his attention back to his audience and smiled.
“That’s it for this evening. I hope all of you had a good time.”
Audience members whined, even as they stood and applauded. Taehyung smiled apologetically, while bookstore employees ushered the audience members out. The store manager hovered near Taehyung, her gaze wavering between him and Jungkook. The latter grinned, said, “Thanks for the book,” and followed the audience members leaving the store.
Taehyung stood, watching Jungkook and cursing at how well he wore a pair of jeans, faded denim hugging his body in all the right places. Taehyung fanned himself again then grimaced at Sara, who stood nearby, smirking.
“Oh, shut up!” Taehyung snapped, no bite behind the words.
Sara grinned.
“One day, you’re going to tell me what’s up between you and Mr. Sexy Novelist,” she sassed.
Taehyung snorted.
“There’s nothing. NOTHING between us.”
“That’s not what I just saw,” Sara teased. “Sparks were definitely flying between the two of you.”
Taehyung didn’t reply, but fanned himself with extra vigor.
***
Jungkook sat in the back of the taxi and opened the book to read Taehyung’s message.
“I hope you sleep well at night, you traitor.”
He sighed and leaned back, head resting on the window. Taehyung still held a grudge over his decision to give up college to, in his words, “chase a quick buck.” Jungkook chuckled. Tae was technically correct. He did chase a quick buck. In his final year of college, his parents told him they could no longer pay his tuition because their shop had gone bankrupt. Jungkook had panicked at first, then remembered a novel he'd written featuring a detective who was suave, smart, and a ladies’ man, not unlike James Bond. On a lark, he sent his manuscript to an agent, who loved it and shopped it right away. Before Jungkook knew what was happening, the agent returned with contract offers from three major publishing companies. He’s chosen one, received a huge check, and a contract for three subsequent novels. He’d immediately begun to plot out the second and third novels before realizing writing AND attending college full time did not mix. Without consulting his friends, Taehyung included, he’d decided to drop out of college and write full-time. The money he’d received was more than enough to help his parents with their financial challenges, plus rent a small, one-bedroom apartment in Greenwich Village and pay expenses while he focused on writing.
Taehyung had taken the news badly, hurt that Jungkook hadn’t consulted him or their other friends before making such a momentous decision. He’d accused Jungkook of chasing money instead of completing his degree and becoming a professor alongside Taehyung.
“What happened to our plans of teaching at the same university and sharing a house with Jimin?” Taehyung had spat angrily.
Jungkook felt guilty for giving up those plans but felt a deeper pull to writing. He could complete his college education if writing didn’t pan out. But Taehyung had called him a traitor and turned his back on their friendship. To Jungkook, it seemed as though he had wronged Taehyung personally. He couldn’t understand his friend’s drastic reaction. It wasn’t as though they were dating and he’d been unfaithful, but that’s exactly how Taehyung made him feel– as though he had betrayed Taehyung. Jungkook had grown confused, then annoyed by Taehyung’s silent treatment. He didn’t owe the other boy anything, so if Taehyung wanted to act as though he no longer existed, then fine. He walked away with a clear conscience.
Or so he thought.
Reading Taehyung’s inscription made him wonder whether he had harbored any emotional feelings toward Jungkook in college. Taehyung had been affectionate and touchy, but Jungkook noticed he was like that with all of their friends. He didn’t receive any special attention. If he were honest with himself, Jungkook did have a crush on Taehyung in college. The other boy had not only been beautiful, but smart - book smart and street smart - and possessed a keen acerbit wit Jungkook appreciated. But, he hadn’t felt any kind of interest from Taehyung, so when it came time to decide whether to stay in college or drop out and write, the choice had been easy. Also - he thought, a little self-righteously, he’d only moved a few blocks away from campus. If Taehyung had wanted to keep up their friendship, he could have just walked over to Jungkook’s apartment anytime.
Jungkook added Taehyung’s book to his bookshelf, next to two other books the professor had written, then wandered into the kitchen, sifting through the mail as he went. A stiff, violet-colored envelope caught his attention. His name and address had been written on it in calligraphy, with no return address in the upper left corner. He flipped the envelope and spotted the name of a large mystery author organization that had been recruiting him to join their group.
Curious, he laid the other mail down and slid open the envelope. He pulled out what looked to be an invitation to a conference of mystery writers and readers in the Poconos. Jungkook snorted. He’d never visited the Poconos, but the cheesy commercials on TV seemed to focus on romantic mountain getaways for couples, with cabins including heart-shaped tubs. He looked more closely at the invitation and saw the conference would take place at a new mountain resort owned by author Hetta Green, the queen of the cozy mystery genre. She’d reportedly spent quite a lot to refurbish an old lodge and cabins into a luxurious vacation spot perfect for writer retreats or other solo getaways.
The conference was taking place the following weekend. Jungkook’s schedule was wide open for the rest of the month, so he logged onto his laptop and accepted the invitation. He was sure to run into author friends he saw once or twice a year (at conventions).
****
Taehyung wheeled his rolling suitcase to the reception desk and gave the agent his name. She clicked several times on her computer and smiled.
“Here you are! I have you in Cabin 7.”
The woman handed Taehyung a map of the grounds and pointed to a cabin in the center of a cluster. He thanked her and followed a path that led straight to the cabin. He knew he was sharing with another author and wondered who he’d been paired with. He unlocked the cabin door and entered, closing the door behind him. The space was lit by warm lamps placed around the large, spacious room. A queen-size bed was set on each side, with a sitting area in the space between the beds. A tall wardrobe sat at the foot of each bed. The wardrobe opposite where he stood was open and Taehyung saw clothes on hangers and shoes on the floor. A wheeled suitcase was tucked into one corner.
Taehyung walked over to the other bed and began unpacking, then he checked out the bathroom, gasping at the oversized jetted tub. He loved taking baths and had made sure his on-campus apartment included a soaking tub. His was large, but this one dwarfed it. He imagined cozying up in a bubble bath with someone. For some reason, Jungkook popped into his head, with that gorgeous face and body.
“Do not go there, Tae!” he muttered, shaking his head.
The Jungkook in his head smirked.
Taehyung was so deeply into his thoughts, he didn’t hear the cabin door open, and jumped when a familiar voice said, “Don’t go where, Tae?”
He whirled around, praying someone else was his roommate, only to be met with Jungkook’s smirking face.
“No. No way,” Taehyung muttered, outraged.
He stormed past Jungkook, intending to leave the cabin and march over to the main building and demand a different cabin, when Jungkook’s voice stopped him.
“The cabins are all booked.”
Taehyung turned to face the other author. Damn Jungkook for looking so hot, with that sharp jawline, large, round eyes, and cupid’s bow lips, not to mention the skintight jeans and form-fitting tee-shirt. The sight agitated him even more.
“What do you mean, the cabins are all booked?”
Jungkook’s smirk deepened.
“Just what I said. I went to reception to request a solo cabin. I didn’t realize I’d have to room with someone else. They told me all the cabins were booked and each one was double-occupancy.”
He shrugged, then glanced at Taehyung, who stood fuming, teeth clenched.
“Can you not stand the sight of me for two measly days?” he asked, his voice mild.
Taehyung marched over to his bed and plopped down onto it.
“I don’t want to be anywhere near you,” he snapped. “I don’t even want to look at you.”
Jungkook sighed and grabbed a bottle of water from the mini fridge, then lay on his bed and scrolled through his messages, keenly aware of the waves of stress and dislike floating his way from the other bed. He wanted to confront the other author but decided to let things be for now. He snuggled into his pillows, letting his body relax. Soon, he drifted off to sleep, phone falling from his hand onto the floor.
When he woke up, the sunlight was beginning to fade. Jungkook rubbed his eyes and yawned. Sitting up, he patted around the bed for his phone, before noticing it on his nightstand, plugged into the charger. Funny. He hadn’t remembered setting his phone to charge before falling asleep. He must have, though, because Taehyung wouldn’t have done it. He looked over to the other bed, only to find it empty.
Jungkook shrugged and slipped his phone into his pocket, splashed water on his face, then wandered to the main building. The reception agent told him dinner seating would begin in a few minutes and pointed him to the bar, in case he wanted a cocktail before dinner. He strolled to the bar and asked for a bottle of water. Twisting the cap, he took a long drink, glancing around the lobby as he drank. He spotted several familiar faces, including Namjoon Kim, a history professor who wrote about ancient crimes and mysteries. Namjoon spotted him, waved, and walked over.
“How’s it going?” Jungkook asked, hugging the other man. “It’s been a while.”
Namjoon grinned, prominent dimples on full display. He ran a hand through his hair, which was dyed a shade between purple and lavender. Jungkook nodded at the hair, brows raised in question. Namjoon chuckled.
“Every term, I challenge students to spot any discrepancies in my lessons. If they do, they get to choose which color I should dye my hair.”
Jungkook laughed.
“You must love your students a lot to give them that much control over you.”
Namjoon shrugged.
“It’s only hair,” he said, grinning. “How are you? Congrats on the new novel. I hear it’s doing well!”
Jungkook and Namjoon chatted as they joined a line of people entering the dining room. Round tables dotted the room, each with ten chairs. Jungkook and Namjoon chose to sit at the same table. They were quickly joined by others, including a debut novelist who’d been trying to get Jungkook’s attention for months. She spotted Jungkook and Namjoon sitting and ran over to try to get the seat on Jungkook’s other side. She slid into it, huffing and trying to catch her breath, then threw Jungkook a wide smile.
“Fancy meeting you here!” she chirped.
Jungkook rolled his eyes internally, offering a polite smile.
“Hello, Josie,” he replied. He knew better than to ask her any questions. She would end up chewing his ears off for hours.
Seeing her open her mouth to speak, Jungkook turned back to Namjoon.
“Tell me about the new historic true mystery you’ve been researching. I’ve heard it’s a doozy.”
Namjoon chuckled.
“This is more up your alley, Jungkook. I’m researching a new lead into the mystery of Jack the Ripper.”
Jungkook’s eyes widened. He turned his body to fully face Namjoon, turning his back on Josie, who pouted.
“What’s this new lead?” he asked eagerly.
Namjoon explained about a new set of reports that had been discovered in the ruins of a police station in London that had collapsed in 1889. The collapse hadn’t raised any alarms, as the station was not involved in the investigation, or at least, no one at the station was supposed to be investigating. Jungkook soaked up every word.
“Hyung, this sounds right up my alley - no pun intended!” he exclaimed. “May I keep in touch with you? I might want to write a fictionalized version of this after your book is released.”
Namjoon nodded amiably.
“Of course! I also welcome any thoughts you have to help beef up my dry, history professor writing style.”
Jungkook laughed and slapped him on the shoulder.
“Your writing is perfectly excellent.”
Namjoon smiled wryly.
“I’m not as scintillating as Taehyung. He’s the real nonfiction writing star.”
Jungkook smiled back.
“You’re not wrong there, Joonie. He’s the total package.”
Namjoon’s eyebrows shot up.
“Wait. Don’t you two have some big feud going on?”
Jungkook sighed.
“It’s a long story,” he began.
Namjoon stood and held his hand up.
“Let me get us both refills and chat. I’ll be right back!”
He hurried toward the nearest bar. Jungkook watched as Namjoon stood in line, tapping his foot impatiently while waiting for his turn. Jungkook turned back to his plate and shoved it away. He’d lost his appetite. His guts had started churning. Did he have the strength to rip the band-aid off the scars from his university days? Of his years with Taehyung at his side? He stood as Namjoon returned, accepting his drink.
“Let’s walk, hyung. Some ears at this table are too large for their own good.”
He walked toward the lobby, and Namjoon fell into step beside him. They left the building and followed a path to a lake. Jungkook looked around before settling on a bench. Namjoon sat beside him. Both sipped their drinks, then Jungkook opened the door to history.
“Taehyung and I were best friends in college. We shared history majors and attended many classes together. After our first year, it made sense for us to become roommates. We became inseparable. Halfway through our second year, I realized I cared about him as more than a best friend. Suddenly, every time he went out on a date, an arrow pierced my heart. I became awkward around him because I tried to hide my feelings. At the time, I was writing my first novel, mostly as a stress reliever. Our courses were challenging. Watching Tae flirt and date with no knowledge of my true feelings was agony. Then, my parents called to tell me they wouldn’t be able to afford to pay my tuition anymore.
I sent my manuscript to an agent on a whim. When the agent called me two days later, saying he loved the novel and wanted to sign me. The book sold quickly, and I was offered an unbelievable advance and royalty percentage in return for three more novels. I had the stories outlined already. Normally, Tae would be the first person I shared any news with, but by this time, I didn’t know how to act around my best friend.”
Jungkook paused to take a drink. He gazed out at the calm waters of the lake, a slight breeze lightly rippling the surface.
“I accepted the deal without telling him. I packed my things when he went home to Daegu to visit his family. By the time he returned, I had moved into a small apartment close enough to the university campus, but far enough away to help me try to begin healing my damaged heart.”
Namjoon looked stunned.
“That’s so heavy. This must have been about ten years ago. Have you not spoken with Taehyung since then?”
Jungkook laughed, bitterness overtaking any semblance of humor.
“He bombarded me with texts when I didn’t answer his calls. I agreed to meet him. He felt betrayed by the fact that his best friend left him out of one of the most important decisions of his life. He didn’t understand why I wanted to throw away my college career for what he called ‘fast cash. I didn’t tell him about my parents not being able to continue paying for my college courses. I used part of the advance I received to help balance their financial situation.”
“Did you tell Taehyung about your feelings?” Namjoon asked, a gentle note in his voice.
Jungkook paused, then shook his head.
“I heard he’d begun dating someone, and it sounded serious. I didn’t want to interfere. Also, he’d never shown that he felt the same way about me. He called me a traitor, mangling history to write cheap and easy murder mysteries.”
Jungkook sighed.
“We haven’t spoken face to face since then, until his book signing a couple of months ago. I’d had a little too much to drink, and I decided to crash his event.”
Namjoon winced.
“Ouch. That blew up on social media.”
Jungkook groaned and rubbed his face.
“Don’t remind me.”
He downed his drink and added, “And now, some buffoon thought it would be a great idea to put Tae and me in the same cabin for this weekend conference.”
Namjoon choked on his drink.
“Get out! They didn’t!”
“They did.”
Jungkook sighed.
“The universe hates me.”
“Why do you say that?”
When Jungkook didn’t answer, Namjoon leaned closer and lowered his voice.
“Do you… Do you still have feelings for him?”
Jungkook closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then, slowly, he nodded.
“My feelings have never waned. But he hates me, so…”
Namjoon patted his shoulder, his gaze sympathetic.
“Having to room with him must be hell.”
Jungkook shrugged.
“He tried to switch with someone, but there were no takers. Or that’s what I heard.”
Namjoon smirked.
“I’m sure there are a few attendees who’d love the opportunity to room with you,” he said, a sly grin bringing his dimples into prominence.
Jungkook rolled his eyes and shuddered, then glanced over to the main building as the sound of a deep bell echoed through the area. He stood and smoothed down the front of his jeans. Namjoon stood and they walked through the woods to the dining room and the table they’d deserted. Neither heard the sound of leaves rustling, or see a figure crouched behind the thick trunk of a maple tree.
Taehyung straightened, his confused gaze following the two men walking back toward the main building. He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but he’d been walking around the lake when he’d spotted Jungkook and Namjoon Kim, Taehyung’s colleague at NYU and a fellow successful author. He’d ducked behind the tree, praying neither man had seen him standing by the lake moments before. They hadn’t, as they sat on a bench as soon as they arrived. Crouching behind the trunk, Taehyung breathed slowly and silently, listening to their conversation.
By the time Jungkook had finished recounting his and Taehyung’s difficult history, tears were running unchecked down Taehyung’s face. All this time, Taehyung had thought Jungkook was selfish, chasing a quick paycheck instead of completing his history degree and joining him in the hallowed halls of NYU as fellow professors and best friends. He’d had no idea of Jungkook’s financial difficulties and inner turmoil, the deep feelings that led him to sell his manuscript, quit school, and move away.
Taehyung wiped his tears and slowly walked toward the main building, deep in thought. He hadn’t asked anyone to switch cabins yet. Should he remain? Contrary to the way he acted, Taehyung did not hate Jungkook. Was he hurt? Yes. Did he consider what Jungkook had done to be traitorous? Taehyung had definitely been hurt, and he’d looked at Jungkook’s action as traitorous, especially as his best friend had not shared one word with him about his publishing deal-or his feelings, for that matter.
He wandered into the dining room and gazed around, looking for an empty chair. As luck would have it, the only empty seat was next to Namjoon, who sat next to Jungkook. A young female author whose name Taehyung couldn’t remember was on Jungkook’s other side, flirting with him and touching him unnecessarily. Taehyung shot her a disdainful look, then asked Namjoon whether he could sit. Namjoon jumped up and pulled the chair out for Taehyung. As he pushed the chair in, he looked up and met
Jungkook’s eyes. The other’s eyes held an emotion Taehyung hadn’t seen in years. Quickly, his expression changed to a polite mask. The change had happened so quickly, Taehyung wondered whether he’d imagined the emotion-filled gaze. Taehyung held his gaze for a moment, then turned his head away, scanning the remainder of the vast room. He recognized several fellow academics and a couple of novelists whose books he enjoyed. He made a mental note to say hello. He turned back to his tablemates as he heard the mystery novelist say to Jungkook, “Come stay at my cabin! I’m sure my cabin mate will switch with you!”
Taehyung’s eyes narrowed as he looked at Jungkook, waiting for his response. Jungkook smiled politely and said, “I’m happy where I am, but thanks for the invitation.”
She smirked at Taehyung, then placed a manicured hand on Jungkook’s arm.
“Don’t be so nice, Jungkookie. There’s no way you’re comfortable where you are. I mean, everyone’s talking about it. Who’s the wiseass who thought it would be fun to put you with… him?”
The table went silent as everyone turned to stare at Taehyung. He tried to act as though he didn’t care. He lifted his glass of wine and said, “I’m not forcing Jungkook to room with me. He’s a big boy. He can make his own decisions.”
He sipped his wine and met Jungkook’s dark gaze. He tried to add kindness to his own eyes. He must have succeeded, because Jungkook’s eyes widened briefly before he looked away.
“Again, I have no desire to leave my current digs, thanks. And Josie, I think you’re very nice, but I’m not interested in flirting or whatever it is you’re doing right now.”
Josie flinched as though Jungkook had slapped her. He turned away from Josie and murmured something to Namjoon before rising and walking out of the room. Taehyung watched him go, then caught Namjoon looking at him sympathetically. Wait. Why did he need sympathy? Taehyung opened his mouth to speak, when Josie slammed her hands on the table and stood. She glared around the table, her eyes landing on Taehyung last. She made a frustrated noise and stomped away. Taehyung looked at Namjoon again, his brows raised.
“That was… something,” he observed.
Namjoon grinned, his famous dimples popping into view.
“You can say that again,” he chortled, nodding at the server who slid a plate in front of him.
“Thank you,” Taehyung murmured as a plate was carefully laid before him. He examined the meal. He hadn’t filled out a preference card, but he didn’t have a problem with the bacon-wrapped filet mignon, asparagus, and a dollop of mashed potatoes with gravy. He dug in with relish and enjoyed a pleasant dinner chatting with Namjoon about academics, their fellow professors, NYU politics, and publishing. Namjoon didn’t bring up Jungkook, for which Taehyung was relieved and thankful.
Dinners were replaced by plates of dessert, with some diners receiving tiramisu and others receiving lemon mousse cake. Taehyung enjoyed the lemon mousse. He asked Namjoon to pass the tiramisu at Jungkook’s place, saying he’d take the dessert to his cabin mate, as tiramisu was one of Jungkook’s favorite desserts. Namjoon grinned as he handed Taehyung the plate, eyes twinkling.
“I’m sure he’ll appreciate it.”
Taehyung smiled shyly and asked a server to bring him a takeaway cup for coffee and a container for the tiramisu. He stood, wished Namjoon and the other tablemates a good night, and carried the coffee and cake to the cabin he shared with Jungkook. Since his hands were full, he kicked the door several times to get Jungkook’s attention. Several seconds later, the door swung open, revealing Jungkook in an oversized t-shirt and sweatpants. His eyes flicked to the container and the take-out drink cup. He stood back so Taehyung could enter.
“Didn’t get enough at dinner? Is this a midnight snack?”
Taehyung rolled his eyes and set the containers down on the nightstand next to Jungkook’s bed.
“You left without eating. You missed a great filet mignon, by the way. I brought dessert and coffee for you.”
Taehyung straightened and toed his shoes off.
“You’re welcome, by the way.”
Jungkook strolled over to his bed, sat, and pulled the lid off the coffee. He took a big sip and savored the robust flavor. He set the cup down and opened the container, admiring the large slab of tiramisu - a tantalizing blend of coffee, ladyfingers, and mascarpone. He brought the container to his nose and sniffed. Did he detect a hint of rum? He unwrapped the plastic fork Taehyung had included and stuck it into the decadent dessert, then stopped, turning suspicious eyes on the professor.
“You didn’t spit in this, did you?”
Taehyung rolled his eyes and scoffed.
“I do something nice for you, and you accuse me of doing something nefarious. Thanks. Thanks a lot,” he huffed.
Jungkook chuckled.
“Well, your act of kindness is very unexpected, especially as you hate me so much.”
Taehyung frowned. He sat on his bed and faced the novelist.
“I don’t hate you. I never said I hated you.”
Jungkook laughed, a slight bitterness seeping into the sound.
“You’ve attacked me on social media for the past ten years, ever since I sold my first novel.”
“I’ve called you a hack and a traitor to education but never have I said or written that I hate you.”
“Did you ever stop to think that those types of posts imply that you hate me?”
Taehyung huffed. “Stop reading too much into my words.”
Jungkook snorted, drawing an alarmed glance from Taehyung, because the novelist’s mouth was filled with tiramisu. Taehyung was afraid a bit of the dessert would fly out of his mouth.
“Anyway,” Taehyung finished lamely, “it’s not that deep.”
He stood and rummaged in his suitcase for sleep clothes.
“I’m bored of this conversation. Enjoy your dessert.”
With that, Taehyung went into the bathroom and shut the door behind him.
***
Jungkook finished the tiramisu, deep in thought. He’d thought a weekend stuck with Taehyung in a remote mountain cabin would be tense and stressful, but it didn’t seem that way. He tossed the container and empty cup into the trash can and lay back on his bed, waiting for Taehyung to finish in the bathroom. He knew he should be spending time researching for his next novel, but he didn’t have the energy.
His mind returned to his former best friend. Taehyung had aged well. He was gorgeous in college but was downright ethereal now. Had he wanted to, he could have been an international supermodel. He had the height and the looks. He remembered hanging in the East Village with Taehyung one sunny weekend. Tae popped into vintage clothing shops, while Jungkook visited record stores. They’d stood outside an Indian restaurant on East 6th Street, trying to decide whether they were in the mood for tikka masala or if they wanted to walk to St. Mark’s Place for burgers. As they discussed what they wanted more, a well-dressed woman had marched up to them. She’d turned to Taehyung and thrust a business card into his hand.
“I can turn you into a supermodel. Call me,” she’d said, then marched away, ignoring Jungkook completely.
They’d had a good laugh and decided on Indian food, as neither felt like walking another few blocks to St. Mark’s Place. Over tikka masala, chicken vindaloo, and samosas, they’d laughed at the woman’s approach. But even as he chuckled, Jungkook had thought the woman’s eye was right. Taehyung could be a supermodel. His brainy best friend, however, only had history on his mind. That and vintage clothes. Jungkook chuckled.
“What’s so funny?” Taehyung asked as he came out of the bathroom wearing an oversized t-shirt and sweatpants. He was squeezing his hair gently with a towel.
Jungkook’s breath caught. Right now, wearing oversized clothes, with damp hair and a bare face, Taehyung was stunning. He coughed and stood, hiding his face. He grabbed his night clothes and strode to the bathroom, closing the door as Taehyung repeated, “What’s so funny?” He wasn’t keen to share that he’d been walking down memory lane, back to better days for the two former best friends.
Jungkook showered quickly, brushed his teeth, and pulled on a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. When he exited the bathroom, the lights were out, save for his bedside lamp. Taehyung lay with his back to the room, blanket pulled up to his neck. He was so silent, Jungkook knew he wasn’t sleeping. He padded over to his bed and climbed between the sheets. He plugged his phone into the charger and turned off his bedside lamp. Then, before he closed his eyes to let sleep take him over, he said softly, “‘Night, Tae.”
There was no answer.
***
Taehyung lay on his side, trying to fall asleep. His overactive brain wouldn’t let him. He kept going over the conversation he overheard between Jungkook and Namjoon. How could Jungkook walk away without trying to talk to him about his feelings? How could he just walk away so easily? How could he let TEN YEARS pass without trying to clear things up?
He tossed and turned, the voice in his brain growing louder and louder. Finally, when he could no longer stand it, he sat up and flicked his lamp on, turning to the bed on the opposite side of the room. He could barely see Jungkook’s head sticking out of his blankets. Taehyung swung his legs off the bed and padded over to Jungkook’s bed.
“Wake up,” he said, poking Jungkook’s shoulder.
Jungkook didn’t move. Taehyung rolled his eyes, remembering that Jungkook was a heavy sleeper. So, he shook Jungkook’s shoulder, saying “Wake up!” in a louder voice. Jungkook stirred under his blankets, then his face appeared, eyes scrunched shut, hair going in every direction.
“Hmmph?” he mumbled. “What’s going on? Is there a fire?”
He rolled over, returning to sleep. Taehyung sat on the bed and bounced on is, while shaking Jungkook’s shoulder and chanting, “Wake up, wake up, wake up.”
Jungkook reached out and pinched Taehyung’s waist, causing Taehyung to squeal and fall off the bed. Jungkook slowly sat up, squinting at the floor.
“What the hell are you doing in the middle of the night?” he croaked. “I barely got to sleep.”
Taehyung remained on the floor, legs crossed. He glared up at Jungkook.
“I overheard you and Namjoon talking out by the lake today.”
Jungkook’s eyes opened wide.
“H-how much did you hear?”
“Everything. All of it.”
Jungkook closed his eyes, his face reddening. Taehyung felt like screaming, but his voice was quiet when he asked, “Why didn’t you ever tell me about your tuition issues?”
Jungook shrugged.
“Telling you wouldn’t have changed anything.”
“You let us grow apart for ten years. Did our friendship mean so little to you?”
Jungkook didn’t answer. Instead, he lay back down on the bed, turned to face the wall, and pulled the blankets over his head.
Taehyung stared at him, incredulous. Then, slowly, he pulled himself up off the floor and lay back down on his own bed. With a heavy sigh, he turned off the lamp, plunging the room into darkness.
****
Jungkook couldn’t sleep. Long after he heard Taehyung’s breathing even out, Jungkook lay facing the wall. Taehyung’s questions ran through his mind on repeat. His reasoning for taking the publishing deal and moving out seemed trivial, and their ten-year separation, trite. But he couldn’t tear down the wall he’d built around himself, especially not around Taehyung. He’d kept up with the professor’s life on social media, including photos of his boyfriends and dates. Each smiling photo of Taehyung and someone else felt like a punch to the gut. Several times, he’d thought of reaching out but each time, he’d desisted, because Taehyung had never shown any feelings other than friendship to him. It was better to keep away.
Jungkook quietly got out of bed. By the light of the moon shining in the window, he located his laptop, a notebook, and a pen next to it. He grabbed all three and left the cabin. The main building was open 24/7, so he trudged over and found a table next to an outlet. Since he couldn’t sleep, he could research and write. Writing would occupy his mind and distract him from Taehyung. He opened the file for his most recent novel’s background research and dove in.
***
Taehyung heard the cabin door open and close. He sat up, wondering where Jungkook had gone. He thought about getting up and following him, but decided to remain where he was. His mind went back in time to the days following Jungkook’s disappearance. Taehyung had returned to school from a trip home to Daegu to visit his family, only to find Jungkook’s room empty and all of his belongings gone. He’d panicked, wondering what he’d done to chase Jungkook away. He hadn’t left a note and wouldn’t answer his phone or reply to Taehyung’s many texts. The loss of his best friend had been crushing. Jungkook hadn’t told anyone his plans. He’d just vanished. Taehyung’s heart contracted, remembering the crushing pain that had brought him to his knees. He’d felt as if half his heart had been ripped out of his chest, and realized the feelings he’d had for Jungkook ran deeper than friendship.
Taehyung had been inconsolable for weeks, skipping all but the most crucial classes, not paying attention in those anyway, and relying on his other best friend and soulmate, Jimin, to keep him going. He remembered just putting one foot in front of the other, leaning on Jimin and their group of friends to hold him up until he could stand on his own again. He’d returned his attention to his studies, determined to complete his Bachelor's and Master's degrees at the same time so he could dive right into the Ph.D. program.
One month after graduation, Taehyung and Jimin had been mall-hopping, window shopping, and just hanging out. They’d walked past a bookstore when Jimin stopped, grabbed Taehyung, and pointed at the display. They stared at the pyramid pile of novels, all bearing the same title and author: Jeon Jungkook. Taehyung had marched into the bookstore and grabbed one of the books, leafing through it. He recognized the crime story Jungkook had worked on in his spare time. He flipped to the back cover flap and gazed at the black and white photo of the face he’d cried over. The brief bio just described Jeongook as an up-and-coming author from Busan.
A tidal wave of rage had overcome Taehyung. He’d stood there, shaking, gripping the book so tightly, his knuckles were white. Jimin gently pulled on the book until Taehyung released it. He’d replaced it on the display table and pulled Taehyung out of the store. They’d stumbled to the subway and sat, not speaking, to the stop closest to their apartment. Jimin had led Taehyung inside, set him on the couch, and made tea. He’d sat down next to Taehyung, rubbing his back soothingly.
Taehyung had not said a word the entire time. He felt like a volcano, hot anger boiling in his guts until he erupted.
“THAT. FUCKING. ASSHOLE. I STRUGGLED FOR MONTHS. MONTHS! AND ALL THIS TIME, HE’D JUST BEEN CHASING AN EASY PAYCHECK!”
Taehyung had melted down, raging until his throat and heart felt raw. Then, he’d collapsed onto Jimin, sobbing in anger and frustration. And heartbreak. Jungkook had chosen money and fame over their dream of teaching together, and who knew what else? He’d accepted the realization that his feelings for Jungkook had grown deeper than platonic. He’d just been working up the courage to confess, afraid to ruin their friendship if Jungkook didn’t feel the same way.
He’d thrown himself into his studies and began writing his first history true-crime book, a look at the five most infamous unsolved murders in the world. He’d received his Ph.D. the same week the book was published. Jimin had thrown him a huge party at one of their favorite hangouts, a bar with live performances every night of the week. Jimin had convinced Taehyung to dress up for the occasion, as he’d taken to wearing t-shirts or hoodies with sweats and slides. His dark brown hair became an unruly mop that grew past his shoulders.
Jimin had picked out Taehyung’s outfit - a pair of slim-fitting black jeans, a cream colored poet’s shirt unbuttoned at the throat. He’d pulled Taehyung’s hair into a sleek ponytail, with a few loose tendrils, and tied it with a leather cord. He’d made Taehyung wear his black ankle boots, lined his feline eyes in kohl, and dragged a pink gloss across his full lips. He hadn’t recognized himself in the mirror. That night, he’d partied with his friends and flirted with the bassist in the band that was playing at the club. They’d exchanged numbers and gone out for coffee and lunch. Taehyung had gone to see the band play at other clubs around the city, enjoying the classic folk-rock they performed. They hadn’t gone farther than good-night kisses, but Taehyung had enjoyed Rafe’s company. They’d looked good together in photos, with their similar lithe builds - Rafe a couple of inches taller and blonde with eyes that looked like pure blue marbles. They’d remained good friends.
He’d dated here and there and had more than his share of one-night stands, but his heart felt defective, unable to develop feelings for anyone. He’d posted all of his dates - the hockey player, the ballet dancer, the chef, the actor – on Instagram. If he hoped Jungkook saw them and thought of him, no one needed to know.
He’d stalked Jungkook’s social media, too, and left snide comments on posts about the novelist’s works. At first, Jungkook had ignored him, then had taken to replying snarkily and commenting on posts about Taehyung’s books. The first time they’d seen each other since Jungkook left was when he turned up at Taehyung’s book signing session a couple of months ago. He still couldn’t believe Jungkook had bought a copy and sarcastically asked Taehyung to sign it. He couldn’t believe he’d actually signed it. His heart had beat in double time as Jungkook stood close, their shoulders nearly touching. He could smell the vanilla and orange blossom scent of Jungkook’s cologne.
Taehyung closed his eyes and sniffed, his heart speeding up as he picked up that same scent coming from Jungkook’s side of the cabin. He sighed heavily, eyes stinging as the truth hit him - he still loved his former best friend. He’d felt his heart come to life at the book signing. The same feeling hit him when he’d walked into the cabin for the first time.
He threw back the covers and got out of bed. This might be the best time for them to speak - when everyone else was asleep. He threw on a hoodie, slid into his loafers, and walked up to the main building. He spotted Jungkook at a table, tapping away at his laptop, a notebook and pen next to him. Taehyung hesitated, respecting the unspoken rule to not bother someone when they were writing. He watched Jungkook’s profile, his strong nose, sharp jaw, curly black hair falling to his neck. The sleeves of his hoodie were rolled up to his elbows, revealing the tattoos on his right arm and hand. Taehyung smiled faintly as he remembered accompanying Jungkook to his first tattoo appointment. He’d watched in wonder as the tattoo gun punched color into that strong forearm - a quill with the words, “scribo ergo sum” written in script. Taehyung had gotten the same tattoo on his opposite forearm.
Jungkook stopped typing, scribbled something in his notebook, then paused, as if sensing he wasn’t alone. He looked over and spotted Taehyung in the doorway. Taehyung gave a half smile and walked over, giving himself an inner pep talk with each step. Jungkook held his gaze as he stopped in front of him.
“May I sit?” Taehyung asked.
Jungkook nodded and closed his laptop as Taehyung pulled out a chair and sat. For a moment, neither spoke. Then, Jungkook said, “I couldn’t sleep. It seems that you can’t, either.”
“Something like that.”
Taehyung paused, then asked, “May I share a few thoughts with you?”
Jungkook’s spine stiffened and he didn’t reply immediately. After several tense seconds, he gave a slow nod.
“You’ve heard my side. It’s only fair I hear yours.”
Taehung scowled.
“There are no ‘sides’ to this. It’s not like we fought, or were a couple that broke up. You vanished one day. You left no traces, didn’t tell anyone what you were doing. We were so worried about you. I was worried. No, not worried. I went out of my head trying to figure out what happened, what I’d done to chase you away.”
He held up his hand as Jungkook opened his mouth to speak.
“Please, let me finish. I need to get this out.”
Jungkook nodded. “Okay.”
Taehyung took a breath.
“I fell apart, Jungkook. My heart felt as though it had been ripped in half. My best friend had gone. I didn’t know why. Your silence killed me. It took months for me to pull myself together. Luckily, I have great friends who stayed by my side, and I was able to graduate with my Bachelor’s and Master’s, and go on to complete my Ph.D. while writing my first historic true-crime book. I dove into my work to try to forget you.”
He paused and took another deep breath.
“I dated. A lot. Some I slept with but most remained platonic. My heart died when you left and no one I met could bring it back to life. I basically went throught the motions when it came to socializing. Only my work ketp me going. Teaching and writing became not only my career, but my lifeline. It’s why I’m sitting here, sane. Or as sane as anyone can be.”
Taehyung chuckled bitterly and closed his eyes. When he opened them, he found he couldn’t look at Jungkook so he looked over his shoulder.
“As I told you before, I overheard your conversation with Namjoon. First, I’m sorry that you didn’t think highly enough of me to share the financial challenge you faced after your parents told you they could not continue paying your tuition. I would have helped you find a way to stay, even if I had to get a job to help cover your expenses.”
Jungkook cut in.
“If that had been the only issue, I would have told you. But you heard the other reason I left.”
Taehyung’s eyes bore into Jungkook’s.
“Yes. You didn’t consider that I might have felt the same way, and instead of trying to talk it out, you just left, made me believe you were just chasing the easy paycheck.”
Jungkook smirked.
“Yes, you told me many times through the years, but not to me - just my social media.”
Taehyung’s shoulders dropped.
“Okay, I admit I was a bit childish, but you starting hitting back and next thing I knew, we were part of a highly publicized feud.”
“We both sold lots of books because of it, though,” Junkgook remarked.
“That’s beside the point,” Taehyung snapped. “I don’t know why the event organizers placed us in the same cabin. Maybe they thought our feud would provide fodder for them to exploit.”
He paused.
“Or, maybe the Universe threw us together to work this out,” he finished.
Jungkook waited for him to continue, but Taehyung remained silent, indicating he’d finished talking.
“I have two questions for you,” Jungkook said softly. “One: Do you want to work this out? And Two: How do you feel about me now?”
Taehyung’s eyes softened. Quietly, he replied, “One: I definitely want to work this out. And Two…”
He stopped, looked down at the table. Picked at the tablecloth. Met Jungkook’s eyes. Saw emotion in them - fear - and was that hope?
“As I said before, my heart died when you left. I couldn’t figure out why at the time. It didn’t come back to life until the book signing you crashed a couple of months ago.”
Jungkook leaned a little closer.
“And how is your heart now?”
Taehyung looked away, then back at Jungkook.
“My heart came back to life when I walked into the cabin yesterday and smelled your cologne. My heart is beating so hard, it hurts. Each beat takes my breath away. My heart… is trying to stay alive.”
Jungkook reached out tentatively, pausing as his hand got closer to Taehyung’s chest. He looked at Taehyung as if asking permission. Taehyung gave a small nod, and Jungkook placed his palm on Taehyung’s chest, feeling the heartbeat quicken under his touch.
He removed his hand, gathered up his laptop, notebook, and pen in one hand. Standing, he held his hand out to Taehyung. Taehyung looked at the proffered hand for several long seconds, then stood and placed his hand in it. Jungkook interlaced their fingers as they walked back to their cabin. They had a lot of making up to do.
***
The next and final day of the conference included readers who paid to visit authors and get autographs or have short chats. Jungkook and Taehyung were supposed to sit at different tables, as the organizer had designated specific tables for fiction and non-fiction. They decided to sit together, not wanting to be separated so soon after reconciling. Readers were excited to see the two of them together, though, and their line turned out to be the longest throughout the day. Readers asked for photos with both Jungkook and Taehyung, and brought books for them to sign.
One eager fan asked about their next projects. Jungkook chuckled and said, “Well, I’m starting a new series, where the protagonist is a renowned history professor who gets pulled into investigating hard to solve mysteries.”
He gazed fondly at Taehyung, who blushed. Jungkook hadn’t told him about this!
"And how about you, Dr. Kim?"
Taehyung smiled and glanced at Jungkook.
“Funny you should ask,” he replied. “Back when we were in college, Jungkook and I teamed up on a research paper spotlighting folk tales about creatures who live underground in various cities. I decided to expand on that and take a more thorough look at each myth.”
Jungkook smirked.
“Will you give me partial credit in your book, Dr. Kim? As I recall, I did most of the research because you had to watch a Korean drama you were hooked on.”
“Really?” the reader giggled.
Jungkook rolled his eyes.
“Dr. Kim is a K-drama addict. Or at least, he used to be.”
Taehyung blushed.
“Guilty as charged. And yes, I still watch K-dramas regularly.”
He and the reader launched into a chat about their favorite dramas. As their chat wound down, the reader said, “It looks like your long feud has ended.”
Jungkook took Taehyung’s hand and squeezed it.
“Yep. This felt like a K-drama. Misunderstandings, secrets, separation, and finally, reconciliation.”
Taehyung laughed. It felt good to laugh, after so many years of frowns and tears. He nudged Jungkook.
“You need to write our story but under a pseudonym.”
Jungkook raised his eyebrows.
“Wait. You’re the nonfiction writer,” he protested.
The reader laughed and said, “Well, if it gets written, I’ll definitely buy it!”
She waved and walked off.
Taehyung looked at Jungkook, who was already looking at him. Butterflies erupted in his stomach and his heartbeat quickened. He didn’t know what the future held for them, but he felt confident they could face anything, as long as they’re together