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Nick walked into the locker room feeling self consious. What kind of team would this end up being for him? His size definately didn’t help with the feelings surrounding him. He knew there were some big guys on the Blues, Parayko, Toropchenko, Broberg, Hofer, so he wouldn’t be the largest in the room at the very least.
Schenn greeted him easily, welcoming him to the team and showing him his new stall. He smiled as Neighbours asked a million questions about Utah and Florida. He watched the team interact, trying to figure out what kind of space he could fill.
He could feel eyes on him the whole time he was sitting there. Walker was staring at him with murder in his eyes. He brushed it off as new teammate nerves and got up. Walker left with Toropchenko. He passed a closet on his way to the ice and heard yelling.
“This is unreasonable.”
“He’s trying to replace Faksa, Alyosha! His feelings are fuck all to me right now!”
“No one’s replacing Radek, Nath. It’s going to be fine.”
“Oh so Snuggy’s allowed to be mad about Zack and I’m not allowed to be mad about Radek?! Make up your fucking mind Alexey!”
“Jimmy is 20. He’s still a kid. You on the other hand-”
“I’m missing my fucking boyfriend! Aren’t you?! Did you even love Radek?”
“Obviously I miss him but that doesn’t mean you have to take it out on poor Nick! He’s still new to the team. Radek wanted us to have a clean break.”
“Fuck you Alexey! Fuck you and everything you stand for!”
Nick ran before Nathan came storming out of the closet. Torpo saw him unfortunately and chased after Nick. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Alexey.
“How much did you hear?” He asked, trying to do damage control.
“Enough.” Nick mumbled, nearly crying. He hadn’t meant to replace anyone or hurt their feelings. Alexey cupped his face.
“I’m sorry Nicky. He means well. Please don’t cry.” Nick sniffled and leaned into Torpo’s hold. Alexey wrapped his other arm around him.
“I never meant to hurt anyone.” He let his head fall onto Alexey’s shoulder.
“Shh. You didn’t You did nothing wrong. How about you and I go to lunch after, huh?” Torpo’s hand carded through his hair. Nick nodded, nuzzling into Alexey.
After practice Nick went to lunch with Torpo, Jake, Hofer, Schenn, and Parayko. They all seemed really nice although Jake was glued to his phone the whole time. Torpo sat close to him and kept his arm around Nick’s waist the entire time. It was a nice distraction. Alexey drove him back to his apartment and they cuddled on Torpo’s couch.
“It’s nice to finally have someone my size to cuddle, handsome boy.” Alexey kissed his neck softly. Nick nuzzled into the touch.
“It’s nice. Were you and Faksa-?” Nick asked carefully. He didn’t want to ruin his new friendship with questions. He still needed to know.
“Me, him and Walker were dating. Radek wanted a fresh start and said we would still be friends. Walker’s taking a break from me because of our argument today.” Alexey’s eyes pricked with tears. Nick kissed his cheek.
“Relationships are hard. Honestly you’ve been my first friend here. I wouldn’t complain about dating you.” Alexey kissed him back, smiling and murmuring something in russian as he did so. Nick smiled back and continued to cuddle the russian.
Nathan walked back into his and Alexey’s apartment after spending all day avoiding home. He was expecting to see his boyfriend cooking dinner or maybe even just watching tv after a long day. WHat he did NOT expect to see was his boyfriend cuddled up with and kissing the one person he didn’t want to be around after today.
“Alexey! Seriously?!” He shouted. He watched Bjugstrad jump and climb off HIS boyfriend immediately.
“Nathan. Hi.” Alexey at least had the decency to look mildly ashamed. “I was comforting our new teammate.”
“I don’t give a shit what you’re telling yourself you’re doing! You’re fucking kissing him!”
“Walker. I just want to say, Alexey said you two were on a break.”
“He’d fucking Russian, Bjugstad! He absolutely did not mean it the way you thought he did! Honestly Fuck you both!” Nathan stormed off to his room. Was he seriously that bad the in the span of two days, both his boyfriends decided he wasn’t important enough? Radek didn’t even want to stay together. And just when he thought that at least Torpo would stay with him like he’d promised so many times, he went and fucking cheated on him! This was a sick world that enjoyed his misery.
Nathan cried into his pillow, trying to figure out where he went wrong. What he did to turn the world against him. When he stopped being enough. He wasn’t enough anymore for Radek or Alexey. They needed someone different. And he wasn’t enough for them
Alexey immediately felt bad. He’d led Nick to believe something false so he could have some comfort himself. He’d cheated on his beloved. He was too much for everyone. He was too much for Radek, too much for Russia, too much for Nathan, and too much now for Nick.
Nick watched Nathan storm off and Alexey start crying with his head in his hands. He did this. This whole situation wouldn’t have happened without Nick. He just wanted to be enough for the team. But he’d been too much for the people around him. Why was the world crumbling around him?
Nick cuddled up to Alexey only to get pushed away by the russian.
“Thank you Nicky. I’m sorry I decieved you. I was selfish and wanted some comfort after my fight with Nathan. I never should have done this. This is all my fault.”
Nick got up and walked in the direction Walker had left in earlier. If he was blaming himself and Alexey was blaming himself, maybe Nathan was too. Maybe he could fix this, help Nathan feel better, and be enough for them.
Nick opened the door and saw Nathan crying into his pillow. Nathan looked up at him.
“Why are you here, asshole?”
“I’m sorry I kissed Alexey. I didn’t mean to steal him from you and I didn’t mean to replace Radek and I don’t expect you to love me now but I’m sorry anyway.” Nathan blinked at him, sniffling, before he patted the bed next to him. Nick sat down and was pulled into a hug by the smaller man.
“I’m sorry I took it out on you. I was angry. I’m sure you’re a great person.” Maybe Nathan didn’t have to be alone. Alexey probably would try doing anything with Nick anytime soon so maybe Nathan could get Nick and he wouldn’t have to be alone. “I was just scared to be alone.”
“I didn’t wanna be alone either.” Nick replied, wiping Nathan’s tears with his thumb. The Aussie smiled and leaned into the taller man. Nick wrapped his arms around his smaller teammate.
“We can be not alone together if you want.” Nathan offered. Nick nodded and kissed the other man’s cheek.
Alexey watched Nick leave the room and just cried harder. He’d just lost any chance of a relationship. He was about to text Buch to fuck his feelings away like old times when Nathan walked out and hugged him.
“Alyosha. I’m sorry I got so mad. I was worried I wasn’t enough for you.”
“I was scared I was too much for you. I’m sorry I was selfish and tried to ignore my feelings in favor of comfort.” Alexey kissed his boyfriend. He felt another presence on their couch and watched as Nick kissed Nathan over his head.
“We’ll be enough for each other then right?” Nick asked as he kissed the nape of Alexey’s neck. Nathan nodded into Alexey’s chest. Alexey was in between his boyfriends and he couldn’t be happier.