Chapter Text
Oh, sunlight. What does it look like?
Well, Cho Kyuhyun has no idea anymore. He's been in his school's art studio for the past week just sitting on a stool, sketching on his notebook, waiting for inspiration.
An inspiration that seemed like it would never come.
Kyuhyun was a senior at his university, a studio arts major who was the best sculptor on campus, or so he thought. His ego was a bit too much sometimes, but hey, how else is someone going to create art if they aren't a little full of themselves? Though what everyone didn't know is that most of it was a show. A show to fit in, yet at the same time intimidate people. This is why he only had a few friends. A number which wouldn't even fill up one hand if you count on your fingers. Most of the time he liked it, but lately it was more of a burden than anything. One friend, Zhou Mi, was due back in China soon after graduation, and he had a prospective gallery space in the works. He was also going to work for a family, curating one of their collections to support his materials supply. It was more necessary than you'd think. Materials are hella expensive if you buy the right kind. Changmin was going to France to model for various photographers, and take in some French atmosphere. As for Minho, well, Minho really did love art. His portraits always turned out amazing, and he had consistenly been selling his work since sophomore year to a family in Seoul. Some said he had the skill of a young Caravaggio, but soccer was his passion. He was due for tryouts for the national team next week.
Kyuhyun felt stuck. He didn't have a future planned out like the rest of his friends. For all he knew, he was going to fucking die in this god forsaken studio because he wouldn't be able to finish his senior project and graduate because inspiration is a frigid bitch. Of course he was overjoyed for his friends and their successes, but damn. It was difficult when none of that was happening to him.
His head hit the desk and a low groan escaped his lips.
"What the fuck am I doing?"
He tilted his head up and rested his chin on his hands, tapping his foot and staring at the mass in front of him. He was intimidated, to say the least.
This was not just any senior project.
He had to sculpt a figure out of a solid block of marble.
A figure that was idealized, with the utmost detail and definition in every groove and curve in the marble.
This was not what he had wanted.
Of course, he never said he didn't want it when the professor suggested he try it.
"It's because I think you can do it, Kyuhyun. You've improved so much since your freshman year, and I think this could be your university masterpiece," the professor said with an encouraging hand on Kyuhyun's back.
He should've said no while he had the chance and just suggested he work on a plastercast of his kitten or something.
That would be more logical than this bullshit he was now facing. Alas though, he nodded his head and agreed to the project.
It was 2am, so there was really no sunlight at the moment to speak of for him to be missing, but the sentiment remained the same. He shuffled over to his laptop, head hung low and hands in his pockets. He opened it up, looking longingly at the Starcraft icon on his desktop. He hadn't played in a week. He was sure his team would be mad at him, but he couldn't really give a fuck at that point. Scrolling away from the icon, he opted for some music. Maybe that would help him think a little. Yeah, maybe gain some inspiration. He turned on his friend Jonghyun's band CNBLUE, hoping maybe the aggressive rock guitar chords would get his adrenaline pumping and produce an idea.
He walked around the studio, chisel in hand, mallet in the other.
"In my head I know you
At the end of this dark cliff, I wait for the light - beyond light
Inside my tangled heart, the light crumbles and flies
I hope now the light will shine on me in this chaos
I hope now, that it will drench me in this drought
I hope now, burn up my frozen heart so it’ll become hot now"
Kyuhyun sang along with the song. It seemed to eerily fit his sentiment, actually. Unfortunately, this only made him more frustrated.
Pacing.....Pacing....Pacing back and forth.
Should he sculpt a human figure? A T-280 Construction vehicle from Starcraft? A bowl of fucking fruit?!
"FUCK!"
He stopped in his tracks, and screaming, turned on his heels and whipped the mallet in his hand at the block of marble. Fortunately, or unfortunately, he missed the block and hit the wall behind it, leaving a gaping hole he'd have to explain to the maintenance crew which did rounds at 3am.
"Well, that didn't go as well as I had planned."
He sighed and walked over to pick up the mallet and return to his table, only this time he was slightly less frustrated due to his act of rage. Catharsis through violence. Not his typical outlet, but there seemed to be no other option at that point, and he felt horrible about it. This wasn't him. He wasn't that person who did things like that. He was usually very rational and thought his actions through before he committed to them. But this was not a normal circumstance.
Nothing was coming to him. Not a damn thing, and it was getting to be a huge problem in comparison to what it was before. He had to have something started for class in 2 days and it was not looking good.
2:30am: It's a little darker and a little colder in the studio, but Kyuhyun is still thinking, sitting at his table and sketching in his notebook, yet again. He decides that the music isn't helping as much as he'd thought. He walks back to his laptop across the room and scrolls through the tracks once more, becoming disheartened as nothing catches his eye. He votes for shuffle at this point, since his thought processes are essentially diminished after hours of work and stress with no results. If you asked him to spell his name, it's doubtful he could've even done that.
"10 more minutes, Kyu. Then you're going to bed. This isn't worth it," he thought to himself.
He hit play and breathed a heavy sigh into his palms. His face was warm, he could feel it. He needed some fresh air, but that would come in due time when he walked back to his apartment.
The first song to grace his tired ears was Brahms' "Symphony No. 3 Poco Allegretto".
Classical music.
Interesting.
Kyuhyun slowly looked up from his palms, eyeing the marble with his head tilted to one side and one eye slightly squinted. He thought he looked like that crazy kid Chanyeol who was in the freshman Studio Art 101 class he taught. There was definitely something wrong with that kid, but his paintings were genius, like a Pollock or a Kandinsky. He had a future. Too bad Kyuhyun didn't.
The longer he stared at the marble, the longer he thought of how it was made. The mix of limestone and heat from the earth, creating his essential tool. The amount of time it took for this to form. How marble had been used by so many great sculptors before him. How the Greek sculptors of the past had worked dilligently on their high relief pieces, day and night, with so much passion and drive to create an ideal image of the human form.
And then it hit him.
He needed to look into the past for inspiration. The Hellenistic statues, in particular, as they were extremely idealized works. These artists sought to free the form from the constricting block in which it had been trapped. The figure had to emerge from inside the block, presenting itself to a world which would admire it for centuries to come for the technique and precision with which it was crafted, and the beauty which it contained in its ideality.
He sat bolt upright on his stool, mouth agape, eyes wide, hands shaking.
His mind had finally presented him with an idea for the sculpture.
INSPIRATION. HOW GRAND.
He would create an idealized male figure from the marble block, just like those from ancient Greece and Rome.
The best part was, the man he would draw was already a consistent figure in his mind. One which did not exist in reality as a human, but his own ideal man, if you will.
With a resounding "FUCKING FINALLY. YES." and a fist pump in the air above his head, he began sketching out the man from his dream onto material paper.
His dream would literally come to life.