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Elementary
Ralph’s sweating as he’s waiting for the last question to show on the screen. The crucial question that will hopefully break the tie and determine the winner for this year’s regional Math quiz bee.
The question reads: If the smallest square in the grid shown is 1 square centimeter, what is the area of the shaded triangle?
He stares at the figure, thinks for a second then solves. He sees his lone opponent raise her marker before him but he reads the question again to check his answer. He knows that this isn’t technically a race. The buzzer echoes as he finishes boxing his final answer.
The judge smiles at him when she announces, “Ralph got the correct answer! Congratulations!”
Ralph keeps his eyes at the name that got too close to winning against him: Shuvee Chrisna Etrata. As he looks at the girl—the first person who ever truly made him nervous in a competition—he thinks about how pretty she is and if her eyes are alive.
High School
The auditorium where they’re holding the graduation ceremony is small but Ralph still feels proud as the emcee calls on Shuvee to the stage to receive her award: salutatorian of their graduating batch.
Later, Ralph doesn’t remove his medal for being valedictorian as he approaches Shuvee. She holds up a hand as if to stop him speaking, “Gusto kong i-enjoy ‘tong moment na ‘to, please lang. Inisin mo na lang ako sa college.”
Ralph laughs, “Ok, Shuvee, I’ll see you at UP?” He extends his hand. She takes it, shaking it vigorously. Her gaze is intense and her smile is wide.
“I’ll beat you there, de Leon, makita mo,” she walks away and Ralph can’t help but to stare at her.
Junior Year, College
Malakas ang ulan sa loob ng campus pero pinilit pa rin ni Ralph na makapasok sa opisina ng College Secretary. He wants to see the tarpaulin for himself.
By the time he walks in, he sees Shuvee staring at the tarpaulin with her hands clenched. Ralph just shakes his head and mutters to himself, “Para namang hindi siya ang top student noong sophomore year.”
“Etrata, baka naman masuntok mo na ‘tong announcement board.”
“Tigil-tigilan mo ako, de Leon, wala ako sa mood,” she huffs and was about to leave the building before Ralph stops her.
“It’s still raining, Shuvee, hatid na kita,” Ralph says as he takes a picture of the tarpaulin that says: RAFAEL AUGUST DE LEON - GWA - 1.147688
“Aba, ang yabang naman, may sasakyan ka? Grabe na talaga ang mga isko ngayon,” she puts her hands on her waist as if to reprimand him and he smiles despite the insinuation.
“No! I have Mika’s e-trike. I’ll return it to her ngayon. Sabay ka na kasi you’re literally her roommate,” he reasons and laughs when Shuvee claps to herself.
“Perfect! Bayad mo na ‘to sa pag-inis sa akin na hindi ako Top CAS Student this year,” she jokes. Ralph smiles when he sees Shuvee climbing into the tricycle. He offers to take a detour to a karinderya but Shuvee shakes her head, “Kung gusto mo akong i-date, de Leon, puwede bang magtanong ka kapag hindi ako bwisit sa’yo?”
“Ah, you’ll say yes to a date pala under better circumstances?” He teases. He just laughs when she pushes him and they remain silent the whole ride.
Senior Year, College
The sun is high by the time Bianca’s satisfied with their pictures and finally lets the boys remove their barong. Sa harapan ni Oble, Ralph sees her wearing her sablay and holding her hardbound thesis.
He keeps his smile small when he approaches her, “Ganda ng hardbound, Etrata! Too bad you don’t have the Best Thesis certificate to post with.”
Shuvee just scrunches her nose and it takes everything in Ralph not to jokingly pinch it, “Published author pa rin ako, de Leon. At mas nauna pa rin sa’yo! Yawa, mamaya ka na nga! Kita ng photoshoot tas iinisin mo ako. Kapag panget mukha ko dito, i-hunting talaga kita!”
Ralph holds his hands up in mock surrender and walks away. Ralph doesn’t remember a time when she wasn’t captivating.
Post-grad
Maingay sa rooftop kung saan naisipan ng org mates ni Ralph na gawin ang celebration niya for qualifying sa UPCM. He should be happy but he’s still waiting for her. Only she could fully grasp what that fateful email he received a day ago meant for him.
He sees her before she sees him. He knows he’s already smiling, already gearing up for the usual spar with her but something stops him. He wasn’t sure what it was but he definitely knows her eyes were different. The familiar glint in her eyes that he looks for in every accolade, every task, every laurel they competed for is gone. It’s not there. She’s not here.
Ralph remains in his spot; he breaks off from his shock when he realizes Shuvee was already standing in front of him and talking.
“Congratulations, de Leon,” her hand is out and he takes it gingerly. It feels cold, “Serve the people, ok?”
He asks before he can stop himself, “I’ll see you there, right, Etrata?”
Before Shuvee can answer, Will loops his arm around her shoulders and offers her a shot, “Hep, hep! Lahat ng bagong pasok ay full shot. No excuses!” Will whisks Shuvee away as the DJ switches the music to something louder.
It’s at McDo—where they’re trying to sober up—when Ralph learns from Will, “Bro, hindi nakapasok si Shuvee.”
He swallows. He looks at Will in disbelief, “Shuvee? My Shuvee? Hindi nakapasok sa UPCM?”
“Oo, bro, nagulat nga ako na tumuloy siya kagabi sa party. Sabi pa nga nila Esnyr ay buong araw daw hindi makausap the day results came out,” Will shakes his head. Ralph knows even Will doesn’t believe it like he does.
Ralph is scrambling his brain. Shuvee’s supposed to be the shoo-in for a slot. Any reputable medical school would want to have her—a genius, the hardest working person he has ever known, and a woman whose heart is with the masses they were supposed to serve. Her credentials are outstanding and the only thing that can surpass those is her heart.
The drive back to his apartment was silent. At every stoplight, he kept reaching for his phone. He types and deletes and types.
Shuvee, I’m not the first person you probably want to talk to right now but I’m here if you need someone.
Shuvee, we can try recon. We can ask about it tomorrow.
How are you? Do you need anything?
I’m here. You’re still remarkable.
His lola calls him before he musters up the courage to text her, “Apo! I’m so excited for your classes to start! Your mom and I are already looking at stethoscopes, what color do you like? Ang gwapo sa’yo siguro ng black na may gold, ano?” He answered but he knew he sounded tired.
Much later, he realizes he finally won against Shuvee at something that truly counts. But he doesn’t feel that particular satisfaction.
Ralph sees her eyes the night before. He remembers the conversations they had in between their review sessions. He hears Shuvee saying, “Kapag nakapasa ako sa UPCM, apply na ako kaagad ng scholarship. Awa na lang de Leon, ‘wag ka na mag-apply.”
This wasn’t a win. She should be here if it was.