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Dazai tried to move with half lidded eyes, he couldn’t. He found himself in the same restraint straps that Mori put him in when they first met. One on his neck, one on his waist, two for his hands and two for his legs. He was on a slab, with just trousers and a button up shirt.
His teeth were banded, so he couldn't move his jaw. There was a small light shining into his eyes, but other than that the room was a nice office space. Chuuya and Kouyou were sitting in chairs beside him, demon snow looking quite threatening.
Something was in his ass… it felt like a clown nose sized spiked ball that was shredding it. On top of that, he was drugged out of his mind.
Kouyou looked down at him, and frowned. There was a bit of drool starting to spill out of his slightly parted lips. “It’s been a full 24 hours now, Mori still hasn’t come back from his trip. Do you think we should get him some water?”
Chuuya huffed, then looked down at the pitiful sight. “Meh. If he’s a traitor then he doesn’t deserve any.” Chuuya was slightly pissed. Ok slightly was an understatement. If Dazai turned out to be a traitor after dragging Chuuya in, and then leaving Chuuya alone, especially after the Verlaine situation he would kill Dazai.
Of course, Dazai wasn’t actually a traitor. Mori knew that so he ordered Chuuya and Kouyou to band his jaw so Dazai wouldn’t talk them out of it. This was just a punishment for threatening Mori. This was a power move, showing him who’s still the boss of who.
…and it worked. Dazai was on the edge of breaking down. He couldn’t think, could barely feel physically. His body was reacting on pure instinct. On top of that he was almost completely paralyzed from the neck down and kind of numb, but not numb enough to not feel pain. The bands hurt his jaw and teeth, and everytime he moved the little ball in his ass would make him start bleeding again all the while he knew Chuuya and Kouyou were talking but couldn’t comprehend what.
How humiliating.
Kouyou bit into the inside of her cheek. “Yeah, but do you really think Dazai would do that? Even if he did, do you really think he’d get caught?”
Chuuya dragged a hand down his face. “You’re right. Fuck I hate sitting here and seeing him like that.”
Kouyou nodded slightly, “so should I give him one of our waters?”
The next time they looked down there were tears on the verge of spilling in his eyes. They both froze.
“Fuck.” One of them muttered it, they didn’t know who.
Dazai was trying his best not to cry. If Mori came in and saw him crying, he’d actually kill himself. Not jokingly, he’d do it. He’d commit suicide.
So he closed his eyes, and gave out a breathy sigh.
Chuuya finally muttered something. “Should I call Mori…?” His mouth still agape.
The first tear slid down his cheek, and Dazai’s eyes flew open. He started whimpering silently while his breathing picked up.
He started crying, Chuuya was gonna tell Mori.
He looked up at Chuuya, terrified caramel eyes meeting stunned blue ones. Chuuya instantly knew what it meant, the silent plea. ‘Don’t tell Mori.’ But it wasn’t a command. ‘Please’.
Chuuya sighed. Then put his hand over the mackerel's eyes. “I won’t call Mori.”
Kouyou was shocked by it all. Dazai’s chest was still quivering but after a minute or two it calmed down.
Chuuya’s eyes got softer. “Kouyou, we should take the bands off. They're hurting him, and if we give him water he’ll probably choke.”
Kouyou gestured to her ability who brought an open bottle of water.
Chuuya uncovered Dazai’s eyes. He flinched at the sudden light. Then he looked at Chuuya again for answers. Chuuya gave him a reassuring, small smile.
“Okay, he’s gonna squirm no matter what we do, so maybe hold his jaw down and I’ll get the bands off.”
“Alright. Are you sure that won’t make him more panicked?” Kouyou asked, with genuine concern in her voice.
Chuuya grimaced. “It probably will, but I think that’s the only way to get them off.” He then looked at Dazai again. “We’re gonna get the bands off. Okay?”
Dazai only starred in dazed confusion.
Kouyou looked at Chuuya, “okay, ready to start?” She was already moving her hands toward Dazai, stopping just by his jaw.
Chuuya nodded. “He’s gonna try to get out of it, so you can hold his head if you need to too.”
“Okay.” Kouyou affirmed. Chuuya nodded the final time, and Kouyou forcibly took Dazai’s jaw as his eyes widened and his head started whipping back and forth. She took her hand and gently pressed it on his forehead, with enough strength to hold him back. Dazai closed his eyes, unable to do anything. He felt gloved hands go into his mouth, for some reason his brain connected the sensation to Mori so he used all his strength to whip his head back one final time, almost knockinghim out.
“Kouyou.” Chuuya said it as an order. ‘Hold him down better.’ She nodded and pressed his head back more.
“Dazai, it’s Chuuya. I'm getting the bands off, it’s okay.” Dazai seemed to calm down after hearing Chuuya’s voice so he continued the monologue as he once again reached inside Dazai’s mouth. “You’re okay. You’ve been through worse. I know the drug is making it hard to think but you’re alright, you’ll be alright. Me and Kouyou are making it better.” Chuuya finally got all of the bands off, and Kouyou slid her fingers off of him.
Dazai wasn’t breathing hard afterwards but he wasn’t breathing normally either. He hated the intrusion, but was glad the bands were off. He looked at Chuuya. “Chuu?” He nearly whispered. Still drugged out of his mind. They wouldn’t wear off, he was connected to an I.V that made sure it was pumping through his veins.
“Hey.” Chuuya whispered back. He wished he was here as a savior, not a reinforcer. They’d have to excuse themselves for getting the bands off. “Okay Kouyou, you can give him the water now.” Dazai looked confused again.
Chuuya knew by now he couldn’t comprehend practically anything. Kouyou tilted his head up with her hand. Dazai looked at her with a questioning expression but when he tasted the water he visually melted.
Was it bottled water? Yes. Had he not drank water for the last four days because he was trying to kill himself and then this happened? Yes.
His lips were chapped beyond belief. When Kouyou took the water away he had the saddest expression on his face, Chuuya almost felt even worse, but he wouldn’t give him more water.
That was because Mori had instructed Chuuya and Kouyou that if Dazai had to use the bathroom then to let him do it on the slab as even more humiliation. And Dazai would probably do it unknowingly in his state. So Chuuya called it when the bottle was half empty.
“I hope Mori comes soon.” Kouyou said, unhappy with how dysfunctional Dazai was.
“Yeah, he only said he’d be gone for half a day but this traitor stuff has got him busy.” Chuuya added.
Kouyou nodded, “yes. And it seems the poor lad is suffering for it.”
Chuuya frowned. “Well, to keep Dazai contained it does take a lot of reinforcements. I mean even our very presence means…” Chuuya trailed off, he saw the smallest blood splotch on Dazai’s pants. In an area Kouyou shouldn’t see.
“Means?” Kouyou snapped Chuuya back into reality.
“Means that he’s quite the uh.” Chuuya stopped. “Kouyou. I request you leave the room for 10 minutes.”
Kouyou raised a brow. “Why do you request that…” then she saw the blood stain as well. She froze, eyes slightly widening. “Request granted.” She got up and left the room, no questions asked.
“Zai’?” Chuuya said it gently, Dazai lolled his head to the side, recognizing the sound. Chuuya always used it after his serious attempts.
“Chuu?” A small, lazy smile planted himself on Dazai’s face.
“You’re bleeding.” Chuuya watched the facial expressions change on Dazai. From confusion, to realization, to horror. So he knew what it was then. “Why are you bleeding?”
Dazai responded after a minute of raised eyebrows and half lidded eyes. A daring expression, maybe it was to see if Chuuya was bluffing..? “Mori put a torture thingy in my ass… it really hurts.” He looked off into the wall.
Chuuya was genuinely stunned that Mori would do something like that when Dazai was only a suspect. “…do you want me to get it out?”
Dazai waited a second, then nodded slowly.
Chuuya unfastened the leg straps and Dazai didn’t seem to even notice. He didn’t move, Chuuya guessed the drug was more effective than Mori ever thought it was.
Because Dazai was truly out of it.
Chuuya hesitated at his belt. “Dazai, I’m gonna take your pants off now, okay? Say… fish if you agree to that.”
Dazai looked at him, pure fear in his eyes. This Dazai didn’t mask his emotions at all.
“It’ll be okay. I won’t hurt you if you agree. Only if you agree.”
“You promise it won’t hurt?” Dazai asked, in a small voice.
“I promise it won’t hurt.”
Dazai looked at the ceiling with a wobbly lip. “That’s what Mori said…”
“I’ll try to make it not hurt as much as I can. But the longer it’s there the longer it’ll hurt you.”
Dazai squeezed his eyes. “Fish.” He said.
Chuuya breathed out before taking the pants off, and it wasn't exactly a good sign when he didn’t have any underwear on. He moved Dazai’s legs into a bent position.
Then he looked at his ass. There was blood leaking out of it, so he opened it and inspected the hole. Again, there was a stream of blood coming out from it. Some crusted blood on the rim too.
Chuuya bit his bottom lip. Then he told Dazai, “this is going to be uncomfortable if you can feel it, but I’m going to try to find whatever’s in your hole, alright?”
Dazai nodded.
Chuuya entered two fingers into Dazai’s blood-crusted hole. Dazai’s eyes widened. “Chuu- it hurts.”
Chuuya felt himself poke something sharp about 2 inches in. His expression dropped. “1-10.” He poked it again.
Dazai’s bit the inside of his cheek, in a pained voice he said. “4”.
“I’m going to try to pull it out now. Just two inches. And then you’ll feel better.” Probably. Chuuya’s mind added the last part.
Chuuya tried to wrap his hand around as much of it as possible, so it wouldn’t hurt Dazai on the way out. Still about half of it was there.
“Ok, I’m gonna pull it out.” Chuuya stated.
Dazai had tears in eyes again, “okay.”
The next thing Dazai knew it was like a mace was being dragged through his insides. There was white, searing hot pain as it shredded his already scratched hole. The pain was a constant intense ache all throughout his body.
“IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS. STOP.” Dazai bit his lip until it went white, then red with blood. His voice got shakier. “CHUUYA STOP PLEASE.” He almost cried out. Then he screamed.
Chuuya looked on in horror as Dazai started crying again, his body arched up against the restraints. He was only halfway through, but it was almost out.
So Chuuya, through the emotional pain in himself, decided to yank out the rest of it.
“CHUU- STOP IT HURTS.” Then Dazai let out the loudest, most blood curdling scream Chuuya had ever heard.
There was a popping sound, his shoulder dislocated. Chuuya looked at the ball, it was a clown nose sized thing, should have been too big to fit into someone. It was covered in blood, some crusted over.
Dazai was crying, silently tugging at the restraints as his eyes were empty.
“Dazai, I’m gonna put some antibacterial cream and gauze in there, just as a temporary fix. You’ll need to come to my house or Kouyou’s office to properly treat it.”
Dazai didn’t respond. He was shaken from the pain, the pain that was only slightly better than when it was ripped out from him.
Chuuya swallowed, then disappeared before coming back with a med kit. He started rubbing antibiotic cream and numbing gel into Dazai’s beaten hole. Then he cleaned up the blood gently.
He put some gauze into it, before finally deciding that this was good enough.
But something was still wrong…
Dazai hadn’t moved an inch or said anything. Was the pain that bad? Or was it that Chuuya hadn’t stopped when he was screaming?
Chuuya pulled his pants back onto him and did his belt before asking Dazai, “1-10.”
Dazai didn’t answer again. He just seemed more out of it than before.
Chuuya looked at Dazai’s shoulder. It was definitely dislocated. It’d get worse if he didn’t pop it back into place.
“Can I pop your shoulder back, so it doesn’t get worse?”
The silent tears became more audible.
Panic, Chuuya thought.
“Never mind, we don’t have to. Do you want the arm restraints off?” It was a gesture of kindness, to make for earlier.
Nothing seemed to change on Dazai’s face, but he finally nodded after a good 2 minutes and one repeat from Chuuya.
“Okay.” Chuuya slowly walked over and took the arm bands off, they pinned Dazai’s arms below the slab. He also took the waist restraint off, but left the neck one on.
All the sudden Dazai clenched his hair and curled into a ball, his crying becoming more and more audible. He started making choking sounds presumably from the neck restraint, Chuuya didn’t know what to do.
#1: he thought Dazai was almost completely paralyzed.
#2: Dazai never displayed his emotions. The fact that he even cried made Chuuya nervous, but also have this deep ache in his heart. He knew Dazai shouldn’t be going through this. Knew it. But he couldn’t defy Mori.
“Kouyou!” He called. Out through the door Kouyou had a panicked look on her face.
She practically ran in, “Chuuya! Why was he screaming- and oh god.” She froze when she saw Dazai curled up. She slowly walked to him, then dropped her shoulders upon seeing him.
Dazai’s teeth were grit, hands pulling at his hair, legs shaking, tears free flowing from his eyes, chest heaving, worst of all his eyes were vacant.
She went to touch his wrist to try to guide it away from his hair, which was currently pulling strands out, but as soon as she did he flinched. Hard. “Please…” he panted out. “Please don’t touch me.” He started coughing and then mumbling “don’t touch me don’t touch me don’t touch me don’t touch me don’t touch me.”
Kouyou interjected, her eyes now full of pity. What was in front of her was a truly broken boy. “Chuuya. You should call Mori. Tell him the Dazai is no longer a suspect through our torture. Bring him home.”
“Are you sure that’s the best move? Mori won’t like that we made our own move.” Chuuya said, but he thought about the options. Leave Dazai to suffer and they don’t get whiplash or save Dazai from anymore embarrassment and this torture but potentially get in trouble.
It only took one more whimper from Dazai for Chuuya and Kouyou to look at eachother. “Fine.” Chuuya said grudgingly, he didn’t mean it.
He took out his phone, breathed in, breathed out, pressed the dial. “Boss?”
“Chuuya. Why’d you call? I’m in the middle of something.”
Chuuya silently cleared his throat. “Me and Kouyou interrogated Dazai ourselves. We’ve confirmed he’s not the traitor.”
Something in Mori’s voice changed. “How can you be sure?”
“We had a direct admission and he gave us a very strong alibi. If you decide he is still within suspicion we will bring him right back. Until then, we request to give him free reign under the watch of me and Kouyou.” Chuuya kept his expression hard.
“That should be fine. Keep him drugged though. I don’t want any escape attempts.” Chuuya’s eyes narrowed, the drug was what was making this terrible for Dazai.
“Yes sir.”
“I should be back in the next 24 hours. I’ll tell you if anything changes.”
“Thank you sir.”
The call ended. Kouyou looked in belief. “We have to keep him drugged?”
Chuuya swallowed, his throat dry this time. “Yeah. Sounds like it.”
They waited a moment, both of them looking at Dazai, he was still crying.
“I think I’m going to take him to my office.” Chuuya said.
“…that’s a good idea.” Kouyou went over to Dazai, and untied the neck strap. Dazai barely noticed. “Mori’s gonna be back soon by the sound of it. Make sure he isn’t crying by the time he does, or Dazai’s in for it.”
Chuuya frowned. “I know.” He walked over to Dazai. “Dazai? We’re going to go into my office, can you walk?”
No response.
Chuuya sighed, then suddenly picked Dazai up, bridal style. Dazai let out a soft whimper after burying his face into Chuuya’s neck. Chuuya lent into his touch, putting his hand through tangled brown curls.
Kouyou chuckled into her kimono. Chuuya glared at her. “Oh shut up.”
Kouyou started walking the other way, “never said anything.”
Chuuya kept glaring at her even as she left the room. He walked out soon after, reassuring Dazai with the IV stand dragging behind them.
Once they got into Chuuya’s office, Chuuya set Dazai onto his couch. He semi kicked the IV stand out of the way and analyzed his rival.
Jesus this was messy. It’d be so much easier if he could take out the drug but if he took it out Dazai wouldn’t be willing to put it back in.
Chuuya gently guided Dazai’s hand into his. He was facing off the couch, how Chuuya had set him down, so he could see the hand.
“Dazai, please answer this time. You idiot. 1-10 for pain?”
Dazai blinked. “Please? Just 1-10.” Chuuya asked again.
“Ten.”
“Where’s it hurt the most?”
… “Chuuya?” Dazai asked.
He hummed in response.
“I know I always say an 8 or 7, but it’s always a 10. It always hurts so bad. Please don’t let me go back to him. It hurts. It hurts so bad.” Chuuya’s heart fell. Go back to who? Mori.
“Mori?” Chuuya asked, squeezing his hand.
Dazai looked at him, not with sad puppy eyes, not like someone who didn’t get their way, or a victim. It was a look of resignation. Submission. He knew Chuuya couldn’t get him out of it. He nodded.
Chuuya suddenly hugged him. “I’m so sorry I can’t get you out.” Dazai’s were instilled with fear. “I won’t leave you alone though. I’ll never leave you alone with him.”
Dazai sniffled. “You promise?”
“I promise.” Chuuya grit his teeth and pulled away. Just then a call came in from Mori.
Chuuya gave a look towards Dazai. Then answered the phone.
“Yes Boss?” He asked from across the line.
“Hello Chuuya. Dazai’s name has been cleared. The true traitor just admitted it, he’ll be brought to the torture chambers soon enough.” There was begging as white noise. Light screams. “Until then, Dazai is free to go.”
“Yes sir.” Chuuya answered.
“Oh, and Chuuya? Could you give the phone to Dazai really quickly?”
Dazai shook his head. “Yes sir.” Chuuya put the phone near Dazai so Mori could hear him.
“Dazai, we're going to have a chat once the drug has worn off and I’m back.”
Dazai didn’t respond. Which was bad because it would show they were lying about the alibi and confessions. Chuuya nudged Dazai with his knee.
“K.” Dazai said.
Mori hung up.
Dazai stared at the floor. Chuuya held his hand and squeezed it again. “I’m gonna take the IV out, okay?”
Dazai nodded. He felt nauseous.
Chuuya took it out carefully. Then wrapped a bandage around it. Dazai watched him do the whole procedure.
“You’re going to start waking up soon. I don’t know if you’ll remember any of this.” Chuuya said, eyes sad. He probably wouldn’t remember the comfort Chuuya gave him, for the worse or better.
“K.” Dazai said again.
“I’m going to go do some paperwork at my desk. Just say something if you need anything.”
“K.”
Chuuya gave him another sad look before turning around and going to his desk.
It took two hours for Dazai to finally get sober from the drugs.
He didn’t remember a thing, only walked out of Chuuya’s room like nothing happened.
They never spoke of that incident, not Kouyou, Chuuya, or Dazai.
However, Chuuya kept his promise even though he had no obligation to. When Dazai went to Mori’s office for that talk Chuuya insisted he come along as well.
Dazai didn’t know what changed in those hours. He could only guess based on the bandages in his ass. But he assumed a major intrusion of privacy, and also Chuuya caring for him.
Which made him smile when he thought about it.