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It wasn't their first time there, and they knew it probably won't be their last either. Frisk arrived to MTT's resort, a truly modern and architecturally outstanding place, if you ignored the malfunctioning fountain inside the place, that is. But this time, in comparison of other times, the kid just went straight to talk to Sans, thus, the story repeats itself.
Clover and Chara got to their table, the same one that they were used to being sat at. Everything was going according to how it always went, Chara and Clover were both aware on how resets work. No matter what happened, Frisk wasn't completely happy with their ending, and decided to reset. Sometimes, Chara wondered if it was truly Frisk the one making those decisions when taking a pacifistic yet slow approach.
"Pssst! I've been trying to talk to ya but you've been on your mind this last segment of Hotland, what's wrong?" Chara looked at the other side of the table, just to get met with Clover's tender eyes. That was something else they wondered about, why was Clover still so kind to them? After everything they've done, they still smiled at them as if everything was going to be alright.
A short and quiet sigh was heard, it came from the Dreemurr's adopted kid, the last thing they've wanted was to hurt another being, afterall, they were one of the few others that faked to believe that there was good in them. "It's really nothing, cowboy."
Clover, of course, wasn't buying it. But they didn't want to push any further, it wouldn't be smart to do so. "Oh, okay. Uh... I actually wanted to talk to you about something, but if you aren't feeling down to do so that's fine!"
There it was again, the smile that both melted and destroyed Chara's heart. As much as they wanted to say that they were cool and edgy, deep down, they knew they could love and care. And those feelings, even as a ghost, came back when they started with the adventures with Frisk and Clover, specially the latter.
Chara did what they knew best, dismiss their situation to go to the next goal, right now being, knowing what Clover wants to talk about. "Tell me, I feel fine enough to listen to whatever you need to say."
Clover looked down at their plate, or at least the plate that was positioned in front of them at the table. "Y'know, Frisk always decides what or where to go in each of their adventures. I was thinking that maybe that was a little unfair to us, so... maybe... I think it would be nice if we could have some adventures ourselves!" a faint blush appeared on Clover's cheeks, not that Chara was paying attention to that, anyways.
"What do you mean by that?" responded back the sweatered kid, not looking up from the necklace they've always wore and remained with them even as a headghost.
"Well, what I'm tryna say is that, we could go off bounds of Frisk's adventure and-"
"No."
Now they both were looking into each others eyes, their conflicting views made the situation tenser than any other they've been through. To break that tension that makes Clover's finger tingle, they say "Please, Chara. It won't hurt anybody. We don't always have to follow Frisk, and you know that. You have gone off bounds more than once and the timeline remained the same." The cowboys lips turned into a childish pout, they knew the other ghost was being petty.
"Well..." they began speaking, but was later silenced by their own lack of words. They really didn't know how to counterargument something Clover said, which is out of the ordinary. Noticing that, they've decided to go along with the cowboy's plan, not of course without sighing first. "Okay, I guess it could be nice to go off script this time."
It was really much more than okay for Chara, there was no denying to them that they have grown a little too fond of Clover, much more than they would admit even themselves to. One of their favourite parts of the adventures were the private time they had alone with the other ghost, and as much determined and headstrong they were about their ideas, Chara felt as if, if they ever tried to get closer to Clover, things would turn into a disaster. All of these thoughts were due to their so called 'realistic' pessimistic nature.
Their train of thoughts were soon vanished when Frisk came back from their chat with Sans, as always, they asked what they were talking about, which they quickly dismissed as something not serious or secret.
"Pssst!" Clover floated above Frisk and tugged Chara's sweater, signing them to follow them. From there, they went straight into the elevator as soon as they saw a monster trying to get it. Thus, them making their way to the location where their off-bounds adventure began.
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Walking through the parts that they knew about New Home was a comfortable feeling for Clover, it brought them that special safety that they needed for a moment like this. Knowing they can go off bounds means that they don't need to act as strict to the script as they need to when Frisk is around. Poor kid, Clover truly felt bad for them.
But that wasn't the reason why they were out there, afterall, they had Chara come along with them, that was the plan, all in all. Their expression was unreadable, it showed signs of hope and nervousness, but that duality was what made Clover fall for afterall, the rudeness and the kindness, the cool and pretty; it mesmerised them.
They have imagined their confession since day one, as soon as they realised that it was Chara who their heart decided to fall deep for. When the ending came, the hardest part was to say good-bye to the ghost that they have grown such fondly of, but it was a matter of time until they became ghosts again.
Of course, Clover missed being a human and talking to their friends, that echo flower in Waterfall of Martlet's farewell to them truly makes them feel a bit peachy each time Frisk decides to interact with it. But it's not as if being a ghost was a bad experience, either. The feelings that bloomed while being with Chara were unexplainable for Clover.
Maybe it's because they watched too many romance movies on the surface, but why was it that whenever they smiled or said something endearing, it made them want to be so much more than friend- Oh! they arrived to the place where Clover always imagined the confession, near the elevators of New Home that lead to Steamworks.
"Here, I think this is a nice place." Clover motioned for Chara to come closer to them, or at least to were their bodies would be. They obliged and stayed next to the past deputy, it wasn't as if they never been to this place, in fact, Frisk has taken a picture with the camera on the path back to the castle on several runs, but it never failed to amaze Chara how outstandingly breathtaking the place was.
They moved their head as to look at the hatted kid next to them "Do you want to talk about anything in specific or did you just want to off the traditional path?" With how much time they've spent together, Chara learnt to memorise some patters that Clover did when they were nervous, for example, the clear eye avoidance they were doing right now. "Well, honestly..." they raised their hand to rub a bit of their head, but also they took their hat off, that was something really out of the ordinary, Chara could only guess it was going to be something really serious. Clover continued "It was for both reasons, I grew tired of Frisk choosing wherever they wanted to go, so I thought it would be cool for us to go our own way, you know? Just, the two of us" As supernatural as it seemed, Clover could be seen blushing.
No. No, no, no, NO. Chara started freaking out silently, the last thing they wanted was for Clover to like them back. The former felt as if they have ruined enough bonds with monsters and some humans alike, so the last thing they wanted to happen was to ruin the friendship they had with Clover, it was perfect the way it was and it didn't need any more changes.
But they also didn't want to leave on Clover hanging, so they needed to respond before they got suspicious "Oh, I guess that could be nice..." Their voice trembled, then they looked at the side, full face, so Clover couldn't see their face at all, the Dreemurr mumbled something, inaudible from Clover's side.
"Did you say something, Chara? I couldn't quite hear you" as if it was any more possible, they got closer. Oh, how much did Chara wish the close-ups were actually possible and tangible.
"I... don't judge me, but... I am scared" It wasn't frequent for them to open up, it was usually the cowboy expressing their feelings out of the two of them, so of course, it made Clover curious, asking them to keep going, so they did. "I really am scared of how the future might go... I am scared of losing you, Clover. The first time Frisk did that run were they didn't kill anybody, the first time I was away from you, it felt as if I lost the last bit of hope I had inside me. And that makes me feel more horrible than I already am. I am selfish, this desire of not wanting to lose you, when you have the need to go to see the monsters that love you the most... it makes me feel like nothing will ever be okay inside me. Everything I've done in the past will haunt me. I am horrible person, Clover."
Some ghost tears could be seen running on Chara's face, which could luckily be wiped away by Clover's thumb, even though the feeling of the contact could not be felt, the feeling that they both needed the most. Chara not using their normal speech patter was the most evident indicator that they were not okay.
Clover took their hand off the other kid's face, and sighed as a signal that they would start talking "Chara I know. I know you are more on the moral gray area of the scale, but that doesn't mean you are not a good person. You've changed, I know that. I dare even say I know that more than anybody in the underground." They stopped talking, only to look at the other headghost straight in the eyes, noticing they weren't capable of maintaining eye contact in such a moment, they quickly looked down again.
"But... I don't care what you've done it the past, it is in the past and you can't change it anymore. I like you the way you are, you are a great person to be around with in general and I would've grown lonely if I wasn't with you, and honestly? I am more than glad that it's you that's accompanying me as a ghost more than you could ever think of."
Although they can't touch each other physically, Clover signaled so that Chara grabbed both of their hands, as a signal to reassure them that they were actually being honest.
"You... are a really lovable idiot, Clover. Please know that, and please, never change." a smile has grown on both of their faces.
They yearned each other with their eyes and Clover really took a great look to Chara, whose smile only grew more fondly, whose smile only made Clover feel as if they were alive again "Soo, does this mean that youuu??" As soon as they finished saying that, they looked away.
Chara froze in place, the question took them by surprise and if they were a human, their breath would've most likely hitched. "As much as it appears inconvenient, yes, Clover. I really do. But I truly don't want to give you false hope, we both know how this story ends and I don't want you to carry the idea of loving someone who isn't even in your world once Frisk finally stops resetting and they decide to finally settle."
This left the ex-Deputy think, staying uncharacteristically silent for a few minutes. Then, they decided to look at their companion once more, to finally add "I don't care how the story goes, I don't care if I won't see you again or not, all I know is that you have played a really important role in my life that nobody ever played before. You may think that your values are not good, or that you are a bad person, or that you are unredeemable, but it's so far away from the truth. I know that you need to keep your mask of a cool-edgy kid, but... I feel like I've spent enough time to crack that shell of yours and know how you truly are. You are no devil, and everyone makes mistakes. Don't carry on your back something that has already happened. If only you could see yourself with my eyes..." Clover gestured the motion of grabbing the Dreemurr's cheek as to look at them "You would see how actually perfect you are"
A tear could be seen, swelled in Chara's eye, a sight rarely seen. But in reality, their eyes were damp. As soon as the liquid fell off the retina, they launched themselves to Clover, even thought they couldn't touch each other, the warm feeling of knowing someone will be there for you in the bad and good times. The feeling that someone loves you despite everything you've done
* It fills you with determination.