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Joel glanced up as he made his way home, a shooting star streaking across the sky catching his eye. He stopped walking, hands on his hips, and watched as four more stars shot across the dark sky within seconds of each other. He remembered how Rachel’s eyes had lit up every time he’d ever seen her witness a single shooting star and knew she’d love tonight’s meteor shower.
That was definitely the only reason he made up his mind to ask if she wanted to join him in watching. It didn’t have anything to do with the fact that he enjoyed having her by his side, or that it made it easier to forget his sorrows when he was near her. This was simply a courtesy — just letting her know about the meteor shower in case she wanted to take advantage of the clear skies.
He continued to lie to himself as he hurried home, made some of the treasured hot cocoa he’d gotten in an expensive trade the week before, poured it into a Thermos, and put the Thermos and two mugs into his pack, along with a flashlight tucked into the pocket on the side of the bag. He grabbed a couple of warm blankets on his way out the door, shoving them into the pack and only just managing to get it zipped up. It was a cool night and he worried that shooting stars and his company weren’t enough to entice her from her warm house, but he wanted to see her badly enough that he was willing to risk the embarrassment of her turning him down.
He passed a small patch of wildflowers next to the path to Rachel’s house, barely visible in the porch light from a neighboring house, and considered for just a moment — looking both ways to make sure no one was looking — before carefully selecting a handful. It wasn’t much, definitely not like the nice bouquets he could get before the world went to hell, but it was all he could manage now. It wasn’t like there were any florists around anymore.
He held the wildflower bouquet a little too tightly as he continued on his way, trying to figure out the best way to ask Rachel if she wanted to go out with him. Well, not out with him. He knew that was out of the question, but maybe she’d go outdoors with him. Or maybe he should just head on back home since he was already struggling with his thoughts and he hadn’t even reached her house yet.
Before he could change his mind, he was at her gate, the wooden fencing a little old and weathered, but still standing. He reached over and unlatched it from the inside, making a mental note to stop by the next day and oil the squeaky hinges.
When he reached her porch, he hesitated at the door, raising his fist and lowering it again twice before pacing across the creaky wooden slats of the porch a few times. He knew if anyone was watching, they’d think he was up to something suspicious, and that thought alone made him knock before he completely lost all his courage. It only took a moment for her to answer, and the look of happy surprise on her face made the previous hesitation and anxiety worth it.
“Hey, Joel,” she said, beaming.
“Hey, Rachel.” He rubbed the back of his head with his free hand. “How’re you doing?”
He winced. How’re you doing? Real smooth, Joel.
“I’m good! You wanna come in? It’s cold out there.”
“I was actually wondering if you wanted to come out with me.”
She tilted her head, glancing down at the wildflowers in his hand, then back up at his face. “Out where?”
He cursed his blushing face for betraying him. “Just… out.”
“Just out, huh? No specific destination?”
“Nope, just out.” He wasn’t sure how one woman could render him so tongue-tied, but he did his best to string together a whole sentence. “I wanted to show you something.”
“The flowers?”
“What? Oh. Oh, no, not the flowers. It’s a surprise.”
Her smile grew a little wider. “Oh?”
“Yep.”
“Who are they for?”
“What?”
“The flowers.”
His face flamed even more. At one point in his life, he would have considered himself to be suave and smooth when it came to someone he was interested in, but he knew that younger version of himself was a fool. The current version of himself was also a fool.
“Oh, they’re for you.” He held them out to her, wishing he’d just left the poor, wilting flowers where he’d found them. “They’re not much.”
She took them from him with a grin. “They’re beautiful, Joel! I haven’t gotten flowers from anyone in years, so it’s a lovely surprise. Although, you said they aren’t the surprise…”
“Oh! Yeah, there’s more.” It was then that he realized she was already in her pajamas. “But if you’re gettin’ ready for bed, it’s fine. It’s not a big deal.”
“No, it’s okay!” She glanced down at her pajamas and fluffy socks, her cheeks pinkening as she met his eyes again. “It’s a bit embarrassing to already be in my pajamas at this time of evening, so I’ll go get changed.”
“Not embarrassing. I didn’t interrupt anything, did I?”
“Not at all! I was just reading. You sure you don’t want to come in while I change? It won’t take long.”
“Nah, I don’t want to bother you.”
She smirked and rolled her eyes. “It’s not a bother, Joel.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him inside, Joel stumbling a bit out of sheer nervousness, then closed the door behind him. “I’ll only be a minute.”
“Take your time.”
She smiled and handed him the flowers. “Will you put these in water for me? There’s a vase on top of the fridge.”
“Of course.”
Joel watched as she hurried to the back, presumably to her bedroom, to change clothes. He swallowed and tried to distract himself by finding the vase and filling it with water, then carefully placed the flowers in it before looking around for a spot for them, finally deciding to place them on the coffee table in the small living room next to the kitchen. He spent a minute or two arranging the slightly wilted wildflowers, wincing at the broken stems on a couple of them — probably due to the nervous grip he’d had on them earlier — then stepped back to admire his work, turning the vase so that the broken ones were at the back.
Once he was satisfied with his flower arrangement, he took a moment to look around the rest of the living room, spotting the worn paperback she’d been reading on the couch with a burgundy throw blanket tossed casually next to it as he did so. She’d clearly been curled up on the couch when he’d come barging in on her. He hoped he hadn’t annoyed her by stopping by, and said a prayer that she wouldn’t think he was an idiot for pulling her out of her warm, cozy house just to sit with him out in the cold to stare at the sky.
She breezed back into the room carrying her boots, and he caught a slight whiff of gardenia. He’d never known if she wore gardenia perfume or if it was just her natural scent, but he’d never smelled anything sweeter. He couldn’t imagine perfume being one of her priorities, not with the way things were now, but he didn’t know how someone could smell so naturally wonderful. He figured it would be strange to ask her about it, though, so he decided he’d just have to wonder about it forever.
She dropped onto the couch with a smile as she pulled on one of her boots. “So no hints about the surprise, huh?”
“Nope, no hints.”
“Not even one?” She pulled on her other boot and began to lace it up. “Not even a little one?”
He couldn’t help the small grin that appeared at her questioning. “You’ll see soon enough.”
“Gonna be worth the wait?”
“I hope so.”
She winked as she got to her feet. “I’m sure it will be.” Shrugging on her coat, she asked, “Is it just gonna be us?”
Joel studied her face for a moment before answering, trying to figure out if she wanted to be alone with him, but he couldn’t read her. “Yeah.”
If he didn’t know better, he would have thought her answering smile was pleased, but he figured he was just imagining it because that’s what he wanted to see.
“I’m ready,” she said, “for whatever we’re going to do.”
He waited for her in the yard as she locked her door, then felt a slight lurching in his stomach as she joined him, standing closer than he expected as she said, “Lead the way.”
He cleared his throat and nodded as he started walking, Rachel by his side. The silence was starting to feel awkward, and he felt like he had to say something to break it.
“So, uh, how was your day?” Joel, small-talk extraordinaire, strikes again.
“It was pretty good! I helped Seth prepare for this weekend’s Apple Harvest celebration this morning where I chopped about a thousand apples for pies, and then helped Maria in her garden for a bit, just doing some pruning and watering.”
Joel had forgotten that Maria had a garden and realized he could have just asked her for a nicer bouquet for Rachel instead of picking half-dead flowers from the side of the path, but then again, that would have involved explaining why he needed them in the first place.
“Sounds like a busy day.”
“It was, but it wasn’t a bad day. Any day we’re not dealing with the Infected is a good day in my book.”
“Good point.”
Joel had been called a man of few words in the past, and while he knew that was probably accurate, he’d also never struggled to find the right words when needed. That skill had helped keep him alive for the past few years, but now it seemed like he couldn’t find a single word that didn’t sound ridiculous. He suddenly couldn’t remember how to hold a conversation, and part of him wished he’d abandoned this whole idea before he’d even knocked on Rachel’s door.
Rachel’s voice broke through his thoughts. “What about you? How was your day?”
“Good. It was good. Went out on patrol with Tommy.”
“Y’all see anything?”
“No, nothing too concerning.”
“That’s good to hear.”
He didn’t like the slight thread of worry that was laced through her words. It was a dangerous time to be alive, there was no denying that, and he knew it was impossible for any of them to be completely safe, but all he wanted to do was take her into his arms and protect her from everything.
He cleared his throat. “It is.”
They’d reached the end of the lane, the light from the houses growing dimmer, so he pulled out the flashlight, clicking it on to illuminate their way.
“I know it’s a surprise, but can I get a general idea of where we’re headed?”
“Just a bit farther.”
He heard the slightest shake in her voice as she asked, “Not outside the gates?”
Joel came to a stop and turned to her, hating himself for frightening her, even inadvertently. “I wouldn’t do that.”
“I know. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have implied otherwise, it was stupid. I know you wouldn’t.”
“Not stupid. But I promise we’re not going outside the gates.”
Rachel’s shoulders visibly relaxed. “Okay. So where are we going?”
Joel decided it was best not to keep that part a surprise any longer if it meant she was going to be nervous about any part of his plan.
“We’re gonna go up on the ramparts of the wall.”
“Why?”
Joel started walking again, looking over at Rachel as she matched his pace, her face just visible in the low light of the flashlight.
“For the view.”
She raised a brow. “What view? It’s dark out here.”
Joel grinned. “You’ll see.”
“I’m trusting you, Mr. Miller.”
He could tell by her tone that she was teasing, but the throwaway line still held a thread of sincerity, and he knew just how much it meant that she trusted him in this day and age. Trust was something that no longer came easy, and it meant more than he could say that she was here with him, following him into the unknown, being pulled from her nice, warm house late at night, with no idea of where he was taking her. But she didn’t hesitate, just got dressed and walked out into the night with him. He could have been taking her anywhere, and yet here she was.
The protective side of him — the father in him, the part that very rarely remained quiet for long — wanted to warn her not to go gallivanting out with anybody else in the middle of the night in the future, but he had the sense to stop himself before voicing the words. She was a grown woman, and she wasn’t stupid, so he set aside his protectiveness and let himself revel — if only for a moment — in the fact that she trusted him.
A flashlight’s beam in his face shook him from his thoughts.
“Who goes there?” Tommy’s voice rang out from the ramparts.
“It’s me, Tommy. I’ve got Rachel with me, too.”
The beam of light stopped blinding him.
“Is something wrong?”
“No, everything’s fine. Just wanna go up on the ramparts for a bit.”
“Why?”
Joel couldn’t just tell Tommy why he wanted to go up on the ramparts so late at night when it wasn’t his turn for guard duty without ruining the surprise for Rachel. “Just gonna hang out for a while.”
Just gonna hang out? Joel felt like he was fifteen again, awkwardly trying to impress whatever girl he’d had a crush on at the time.
“That right?” Joel could hear the amusement in his brother’s voice and was grateful for the darkness that hid his blushing face. He knew Tommy would never let him hear the end of it.
“Yep, if that’s okay.”
“I ain’t got a problem with it. Come on up.”
Joel glanced at Rachel, hoping she wasn’t as mortified as he was, but she just flashed him a relaxed smile.
He cleared his throat and aimed his flashlight at the stairs leading up. “After you.”
He followed her up and then started to usher her farther down the walkway, away from Tommy, but was interrupted by Tommy calling after them, a laugh in his voice, “I thought we were gonna hang out?”
Joel didn’t stop walking, but lifted a hand in a one-fingered salute over his shoulder. Tommy’s laughter followed them as they continued making their way down the rampart, and Joel knew he’d have plenty to say about this tomorrow.
“What was that all about?”
“No idea. So, uh, this looks like a good spot.”
“As opposed to any other part of this walkway?” she teased.
“You wanna keep walking?”
Rachel laughed. “No, this is good.”
Joel pulled out the blankets from his pack, laying out one on the walkway and handing the other to Rachel.
“Have a seat.”
She did as he said, stretching her legs out in front of her and draping the blanket over them. “Are we having a late-night picnic?”
Joel sat next to her and pulled out the Thermos of hot chocolate, along with the two mugs. Should he have brought food? He probably should have brought food. “No, not a picnic. Just something warm to drink.”
“Hot water?”
Joel huffed a laugh. “Not hot water.”
“What is it?”
He poured some of the hot chocolate into the better of his two mismatched mugs and handed it to her. “See for yourself.”
She took the warm mug, cupping it in her hands, then smiled at him over the rim before taking a sip. “Oh my god, is this hot chocolate?”
Joel grinned. “It’s good, huh?”
She took another long sip. “Where did you get hot chocolate mix?”
He poured some into his own chipped mug. “Traded for it.”
“What did you have to trade for this beverage sent down by the gods?”
“More than I should have.”
“Well, it was worth it.” She closed her eyes, savoring her next sip.
Seeing the expression on her face as she drank the hot chocolate definitely made that expensive trade worth it.
He took a sip of his own hot chocolate and had to admit that it was one of the best things he’d had to drink in a long time. He would never tell Ellie, but it was far better than the poor-quality coffee he’d traded for a few months prior. The thought of surprising Ellie with the third and final packet of the hot chocolate mix warmed him even more than the drink.
A gasp from Rachel drew him from his thoughts. “What?” He was suddenly on alert, expecting to see hordes of Infected invading the gates. “What is it?”
Rachel pointed at the sky. “Look!”
Lost in the fog of happiness of being with Rachel and drinking his hot chocolate, he’d almost forgotten why he’d brought her up here in the first place. He grinned at the glee on her face.
“That’s why we’re here.”
Rachel’s smile widened a little more, but her head was still tilted slightly to the side in confusion. “Did you know it was going to happen?”
There was just a suggestion of smugness in his answering grin. “Keep looking up.”
She did as he said, then laughed in delight. “Oh my god, it’s a meteor shower!”
Joel grinned even more. “Yep.”
“How did you know?”
It was a fair question. There were no more newspapers, internet articles, or almanacs reporting on things like the best times to view meteor showers.
“I saw a few tonight and hoped there would be more.”
Rachel tore her gaze from the sky to stare at Joel for a moment, clearly thinking things through. “And then you came to my house.”
Joel was, once again, thankful for the darkness hiding his face, which he knew was probably turning a lovely shade of red. “I did.”
She smiled knowingly at him before turning her gaze back to the sky. “I’m glad you did.”
He didn’t know what to say, so he just cleared his throat before taking another sip of hot chocolate. If he’d been a bit more suave, he would have said something smooth and romantic and she would have fallen into his arms, totally in love. Unfortunately, this was real life and not a movie, so he continued sipping his hot chocolate as they both watched the stars shooting across the sky in silence.
Eventually his gaze left the stars and fell on Rachel’s face.
“Beautiful.”
“It is,” she agreed without turning her eyes away from the sky.
Joel took a moment to gather up his courage. He’d fought Infected, he’d lived with an abusive father, he’d fended for himself for most of his life, he’d fought for his life more times than he could count. Surely he could tell Rachel how he felt.
“That’s not what I meant.” His voice had grown a bit raspier, but he refrained from clearing his throat again.
Rachel continued to stare at the stars for a moment before his words registered, then turned to look at him, only to find that he was already gazing at her. “What?”
“I didn’t mean the stars.” He swallowed as he watched the realization settle on her face and the blush spread across her cheeks, just visible in the low light.
“You didn’t?” she breathed, barely able to string the words together.
He shook his head slowly. “No.”
Her gaze dropped to his lips for the briefest of moments before she looked into his eyes again, and it was all the invitation he needed. He raised his hand slowly to her cheek, giving her plenty of time to stop him if she wanted. By the way she leaned in slightly to him, he didn’t think she wanted him to.
She moved in a little closer to him and he closed the distance between them, brushing his lips against hers softly, before pulling back just enough to look into her eyes.
“This okay?” he asked in a husky voice.
She bit her lip as she nodded, reaching up to cup the back of his head and pulling him down to her again, her lips pressing against his with just a bit more urgency. He slid his free arm around her waist, pulling her as close as he could get her, as he deepened the kiss.
A bit breathless, Joel leaned back to gaze at Rachel’s face for just a moment. He thought he caught a flash of a shooting star out of the corner of his eye, but found he no longer cared about the meteor shower. If the tightness of Rachel’s embrace was any indication, she’d forgotten about it, as well.
A hint of a teasing smile appeared on Rachel’s face as she whispered, “You’re not watching the shower.”
“Neither are you.”
She laughed softly. “You brought us up here to watch it, though.”
Her eyes sparkled and he could have sworn it was the reflection of a shooting star.
“I can see them.”
She bit her lip as she grinned. “Sounds like a line, but I’ll allow it.”
Joel laughed. “Not a line.”
“Whatever you say, Mr. Miller.”
She closed the distance between them again, pressing her lips gently against his, then melted into him as he held her close.
Rachel was right that the reason he’d brought her to the ramparts was to watch the meteor shower, but that was the last thing on his mind now. It occurred to him that, for the first time in a long time, he felt utterly at peace. There was nothing else he needed at the moment. He knew Ellie was safe with Maria, helping out with Benji, and he had no pressing responsibilities for a change. He never wanted to leave this moment.
Rachel pressed another soft kiss to his lips then leaned back just a little. “Penny for your thoughts?”
“Just thinkin’ about how nice this is.”
She hummed softly. “It is, isn’t it? So you don’t want to watch the meteor shower anymore?”
“Nope.”
Rachel’s laugh was cut short as Joel kissed her again.
Maybe they’d still have time to catch a few shooting stars in between kisses later in the night, maybe not, but Joel didn’t care. There would always be more opportunities to see meteor showers in the future, and he didn’t want to waste a moment of savoring the time he had with Rachel tonight. He’d learned years before not to take time with loved ones for granted, and he had no intentions of wasting a second with her.
He hoped there would be plenty of nights spent just like this in his future — kissing Rachel under a sky full of glittering stars, not a care in the world, everyone he loved safe within Jackson’s walls — and if he had to sacrifice seeing a few falling stars along the way, it was worth it as long as she was in his arms.