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Long has Katsuki had to live with this overarching sense of foreboding, threatening to swallow him up--dreams and all--if he isn't careful.
On his way to the examination site this morning, that strange miasma has seeped through the city, coiling around his legs no matter how fast he walks.
Today is exam day.
And though he is 100% confident he will pass with flying colors (hell, maybe even a parade) he's not entirely sure that Izuku will fail. In fact, his confidence in that outcome is... staggeringly low, despite his best hopes.
"Fuck... that fucking nerd," he grumbles repeatedly under his breath, not caring how he disturbs the other students around him.
People part around him, as if the dark rain cloud hanging over his head is contagious.
Shit! It's all because of that stupid dream!
That day the sludge villain attacked, Katsuki witnessed once again true heroism in that damned Deku's eyes. That stupid nerd almost threw his life away--why. Who does he think he is?! Because of him, Katsuki has nightmares... of being enveloped and suffocated, forced to watch Izuku drag his beaten and bloodied corpse towards him, blood pouring out of his lips shaped in a smile.
"You looked like you needed saving."
Katsuki freezes mid-step, a shudder running through him.
You stupid moron... who needed saving?! I could have... You could have...
But they didn't. They were fine. This time. But what about next time?
Katsuki used to feel unnerved, having those gloomy green eyes following him all the time. His whole life, he could feel Izuku right behind him. Those eyes felt like pressure. His weak, feeble body and fanatical obsession drove Katsuki up the wall... then, for ten months, that overwhelming pressure has been suspiciously absent.
What has he been up to all this time? There's no way he's given up. Today is the exam...
Katsuki grins to himself. Deku... he must have given up by now.
...No. He's even more obsessed now than before. Katsuki's grin falters.
Rather than feel relieved of that pressure, Katsuki's anxiety has coiled tighter and tighter as the days went by. Katsuki tried so hard to ignore all of it and focus on himself--his own progress, his own studies, his own success. But no matter what he does, he can't help but feel he's waiting for... something.
Waiting for the other shoe to drop.