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Once the initial shock wore off, Lao regretted his reaction to what Arez had done. Leon unquestionably deserved to die. There was no doubt about that. Arez had killed Leon to protect Lao, and though he was loathed to admit it, Lao had needed protecting at that time.
If it’d been the other way around, Lao wouldn’t have been angry. He wanted to protect Arez, not be protected by him. Lao knew he had become so jaded and twisted by the war he was unrecognisable to even his own brother. If Arez became the same way, if Arez lost his innocent naïve spark, Lao would never forgive himself. Arez had already strayed so far from the sweet boy Lao had fallen in love with when Lao was eleven and Arez thirteen. He wouldn’t be able to handle it if Arez became like him.
It took Lao some time to feel steady-headed enough to go after Arez. He had lost a lot of blood, but he worried Arez had lost something worse. That alone was a driving force, forcing him to find strength he hadn’t know he’d had, to rise to his feet and start his search. There were only so many places Arez could be. Thus was the nature of a prison. Lao doubted Arez would bother with their idiotic classmates. He went outside, where the sun was setting and the stars coming out to play. Sweet scents of twilight brought memories of their last escape.
Yet again Lao found Arez on the swing. As before, Arez wasn’t using the swing; he sat there, shoulders slumped, head lolled to one side, against the chain, hair loose and moving ever so gently in the dusky breeze. Seeing him so upset twinged Lao’s heart with agony.
“Arez,” said Lao gently as he made his approach. Arez didn’t turn to look at him. “I want to talk to you, Arez.”
Lao placed a hand on Arez’s shoulder as he walked around to in front of him, crouching down slightly, tiger-like, so their eyes could meet. Arez leant into the touch, not bothering to hide the redness of his teary eyes.
“I should’ve been the one to kill Leon,” said Lao. “If I’d been better able to control my magic, you wouldn’t have had to sully yourself. That’s why I’m upset. I let you down.”
“I didn’t do it,” Arez whispered. “I said I did but I didn’t.”
Lao felt relief wash over him like a flood. “Was it Nova?”
Arez nodded his head yes.
Lao wiped the tears from Arez’s cheeks. “It’s okay,” he said, “Leon deserved it. You did the right thing, given circumstances.”
Arez shook his head no. “I didn’t try hard enough to stop him. It happened too fast.”
“That’s fine. It’s not your fault, Arez.”
Arez sighed heavily. “What would a former assassin of some vague sort understand?”
“How much it hurts to kill someone, obviously,” replied Lao. “I don’t want you to ever hurt like this again, Arez. I don’t want you to ever hurt, period.”
Arez looked up at him, eyes wide, that beautiful stormy gray, like the sea of emotion within them both. The sea of their love.
Lao leant forward, pressing his lips against Arez’s.
Arez gave a cry of surprise.
Lao’s cheeks flushed prettily. “Sorry. I --”
Arez kissed him again, frantic yet sweet, pulling Lao close. Lao was immediately addicted to the taste, spearmint and berries and something uniquely undefinably Arez, and pressed nearer to get more.
Together they fell from the swing, Lao landing on his back, Arez on top of him. They looked at each other, Arez down at Lao, Lao up at Arez, and laughed. Lao dropped his forehead to Arez’s shoulder as he laughed, tightening his arms around Arez, never wanting to let go.
As their laughter died, Lao rested his head back on the grass. He thought, not for the first time, how much he’d enjoy Arez on top of him in other ways also. Today would not be that day; Lao wasn’t ready, but he knew, someday, when the war was over, they would take each other’s virginities. It would be unfair to call it making love when they already held so much love for each other in such simple looks and touches.
“Are you okay?” asked Arez, with such affection and concern and love in his voice it made Lao wonder if he was being siren sung.
“I’m fine,” replied Lao. “I like it here.” He brought a hand around to caress Arez’s cheek, revelling in the heat of his blush. “Kiss me again?”
Arez did. Lao thought if he ever went one day in the future without Arez’s kisses, he might die.
As the darkness closed in around them, the princess and the siren continued to kiss, their love undisturbed.