Chapter Text
First time I saw you, you were swarmed with Bokuto, Komi, and at least four other people. Actually, I didn’t know if I could call it "seeing" you, as all my eyes saw were your right ear and the back of your head. Your hair was a lot shorter back then, and it made tiny curls at its end. It looked cute.
I was about to do an attempt to save you—actually, I just wanted to know what made them so excited about, but before I could even try, you were able to get out of the mob by yourself. Nice, I thought while immediately greeting, "Hello there!" I began walking as you turned your head, and I almost laughed at how your eyebrows formed a slight but visible expression I read as 'oh not more of them.' Don't worry, little one, this senpai wouldn't hug you from behind from the first meeting unlike some certain person. "Sorry to tell you this on your first day, but he's just going to get worse after this," I said, eyeing you closely, trying to predict what you were going to say. Would it be an 'ah, I see', or would it be an awkward laugh?
But your actual reply surprised the heck out of me. "I can sort of sense it," was what you said in a deadpan tone, and I almost burst out laughing right then and there. Interesting! This new kid was interesting! Trying to keep my cool, I let out a series of chuckles instead, eyeing your rather expressionless face.
"You won't know the end of it," I said, having to bite my inner lip else my grin would break into laughter. I looked at you again, examining you closely with such a fascination. "So you're a new member, huh..." I mused, my sight traveled from your toes up to your head, and that was when my eyes met yours again, and your eyebrows furrowed a little under my gaze. "I'm Konoha, second year wing spiker. Welcome to the team!" I said, feeling your eyes looking closely at me. I answered them with a broadening smile.
"I'm Akaashi Keiji and I play as a setter. Please take care of me from now on," you replied politely, your stare still lingered on my face when my eyes widened. Oh. So that was why they—especially Bokuto—were so excited earlier.
"A setter? Nice," I said, putting my hands on my shorts' pockets, grinning. "After Minami-senpai graduated, our only setter right now is Shimano-san. Ah, that's him, by the way." I pointed to a black-haired man talking with Shirofuku at the other side of the gym. "Anyway, he's a third-year so he's graduating next year, and we have no setter in our grade, so!" I beamed toward you, extending my hand for a handshake. "Give me lots of good tosses from now on 'kay, Akaashi-kun?"
You looked a bit surprised for a second there, probably weren't used to this kind of greeting from a teammate. But you reached to my hand anyway, and I could feel rough, rather calloused palm and fingers meeting my own, the roughness of your arm somehow contradicted the calm and collected atmosphere you had on your face. Ah, you were a hard-worker, I thought, already feeling like I would entrust my spikes for your tosses.
"Akaashi! Hey! Akaashi, right?!" Our short, quiet moment of introduction was unfortunately interrupted by a loud owl head shouting all the way from across the court. Both of us turned our heads at the same time. "You said you're a setter right? Come toss for me!" Ah, typical Bokuto, I thought with a sigh. I could only form a grin at what happened afterward, namely him dragging not only you but Komiyan into this as well. I glanced at you just before you turned your head to me.
"Sorry, I guess duty calls," you said, almost without a tone. I let out a short chuckle as I run my fingers through my hair, amusement never left my face since the second I saw you. Man, you really were interesting!
"Good luck," I said, waving you a goodbye."And a word of advice, don't try to tire him out. You'll lose."
You turned your body afterward and started walking toward that pain in the ass Bokuto. I couldn't help but curving a smile looking at your back, thinking how well you'd fit into this team already.
Ah, summer. The heat. The sun. The neverending sweat. Did I mention the heat, the sun, and the neverending sweat? Yes, summer was my least favorite season.
But well, at least all the volleyball activities—from inter-high tournament to the joint training camp—were a good compensation. This was my second year joining, and although it was exhausting and hot as hell, meeting other players from other schools and having matches with them was something I'd really enjoyed last year, and would enjoy again this year.
It was your first training camp, but you were adapting pretty quickly. As you were our only other setter, the coach figured this was a good chance to get you used to playing against the other powerhouse teams in the prefecture. Although it was hot and quite noticeably tiring you out, you never complained, not once. Aside from the matches and the self-practice, you also stayed up a bit later than scheduled sleep time to entertain Bokuto with five rounds of trump games. You woke up right on time the next day, albeit grumpily. When I first joined the camp, I passed out right after bath on the first day and almost didn't wake up the next morning thanks to all the exhaustion, so I wondered where you got all your energy from.
That was, until I saw your breakfast plate.
"A, Akaashi-kuuun?" I said, eyes shooting open at the mountain of food that was clearly not a breakfast portion—or any other meal of the day for that matter. "We're gonna practice right after this, you know?"
"I'm eating this much exactly because of that," you said in your usual deadpan tone, glancing at my plate. "I'm the one who wants to ask you how you get through this training camp with your breakfast..."
"This is normal, you know?! Please look at other people's plates, I'm telling you you're the one who has too much food," I said while slightly shaking my head, but my lips formed an amused smile instead.
"I beg to differ," you stated shortly. "He's got about the same amount of food as I do," you said, head slightly turning and finger pointing to... Ah, of course.
"Akaashi!" This was one of those moments when I asked myself 'what had I ever done in my previous life to have to hear this scream before 7 in the morning... for one whole week.' "And Konoha! Morning! You seriously need to eat more! Look at Akaashi!"
I shook my head while letting out a long sigh at the incoming Bokuto, deciding to ignore him as I turned my head to you. "Are you sure you want to compare yourself to this guy?"
Your lips, to my surprise, formed something that looked like a very slight smirk. "Sorry, Konoha-san, this time I side with Bokuto-san." Bokuto blinked his eyes.
"Eh? What? What are you guys talking about?" he asked, confusion shaped his whole face.
"Nothing," I answered, lips slowly shaping a smirk as well.
"Eeeeh!" he protested loudly as he pouted and turned his head to you. "Akaashi, you said you were on my side, didn't you! What was it all about!"
You gazed at me as if asking me what to say. All I gave you was a small shrug, and apparently that was what you'd decided to give to Bokuto too. It, of course, prodded him to protest some more, and prompted us grinning to each other. Well, I grinned at you and you gave me some sort of curve at the edges of your lips.
Heh, I really felt like I could get along with you.
"Oh, nice work today," I greeted as the clubhouse's door opened and I saw you appearing from between the opening. "Your tosses today felt really good."
"Thank you. Good work today," you replied as you walked to your locker, not too far away from mine, opening it while wiping your forehead and cheeks with a towel. "I've been feeling pretty good lately."
"Yeah, how do I say it... Your tosses felt more and more precise lately," Sarukui chirped in as he sat down the bench, putting on his socks. I nodded along in agreement.
"Thank you, Sarukui-san. It feels good to toss to you too," you said with a barely visible smile. I'd always liked the slight expressions on your face, they were subtle but there was an art in finding the slightest movement of your eyes, of your eyebrow, of your lips. Your hair had gotten a bit longer from the start of the school year, although you'd kept it at a manageable, tidy length. That didn't help the curls at the end of some strands to stick out, though, and I'd never gotten bored from looking at them. Well, your overall appearance was... huh.
"Wait a minute," I said, my eyebrows furrowing as I stared at you some more. You turned your head to me with a questioning look while I began making my way toward you with increasingly thinning eyes plus a frown.
"Konoha-san?" you called, the puzzled look in your face was getting more apparent when I stopped and stood still beside you, placing my hand on your shoulder. I looked at you with an increasing seriousness on my face, which did not help your current state of confusion. "Is there... Anything I can help you with?"
"Akaashi," I said, voice firm. I could feel Komiyan and Sarukui in our immediate surrounding glancing at us every few seconds while doing their own thing. "You... What's your height right now?"
"Eh?" You blinked your eyes. "Last health check up, I was 174 cm."
"And how long ago was it?"
"Huh? October, I think?"
"I was 177," I said almost absentmindedly. "I was 177 in that check up..." I repeated, standing with my back straightened, staring at you from the top of your head to your torso down all the way to your feet, then quickly back up to your head. You stared at me with eyebrows furrowing by every second but not saying anything. It was Komiyan who broke the silence with a snort.
"Akaashi," he said when you turned your head to him, his face completely amused. "Looks like he's bitter 'coz you're taller than him now."
I frowned. "I'm not!" I retorted annoyedly. "Did you even grow? It might just be your socks."
"Ah, now that you say it," you said in reply, not answering my question, looking up while tilting your head a bit. "My mom said something about how I seemed taller after my birthday. She said it was like I grew overnight." I groaned.
"Dammit, you teenager! Stop growing! I don't want to be the shortest in this team! Komiyan doesn't count!"
"Oi, rude! I'm right here! And you're still a teenager too!"
Even without Bokuto, today was a lively day in the clubhouse as well, and was that a small curve at the edge of your lips I saw there?
You were amazing.
It was your first official match. It shouldn't have been, because Shimano-san was still our main setter and he was going to pass the baton to you as soon as the spring tournament was over. But he got hit by a ball on his head, and you were our only other setter. You, a first-year, debuted for your first official match in the Nationals.
I could feel the tenseness in you when you stepped into the court—heck, anyone would feel so if they'd been in your position. But I knew you could do it. No, I wasn't just saying it just to make you relax or something, but I really thought you could do it. I knew how hard you'd practiced, I knew how you always watched us closely both in practice and in matches. I knew you'd make sure you practiced with every one of our team's members to make sure you knew us well, you knew how we played. I knew you were under pressure because you felt like you were expected to be as great as Shimano-san who had two years more experience than you.
I wasn't standing in the court with you, so all I could do was to cheer on you with the others from the side. I wanted you to know that we were behind you, that we believed in you, that I believed in you. So when you did so well in the last ten points of the last set, my smile was one of the proudest of them all.
"You really did it today," I said, tossing you a can of sports drink, which you caught with ease despite how unprepared you were. You slightly smiled.
"Thank you. It was because the others played so well," you answered humbly.
"Well, that too, but they wouldn't do so good if it weren't for your tosses."
"Well," you said, opening the can and taking a sip of it. "I'd settle with all of us playing well, then." I snorted.
"Where did that previous humbleness go," I said, laughing, circling my arms around your shoulders. They felt warm. There was a quiet pause between us as I felt your shoulders slowly tensing, and I grinned. "Well then!" I half-yelled, making you flinch a bit by the sudden raise of voice. "Thanks to you we're able to go to the next round now! I gotta get ready for my turn too."
You let out a short sigh to accompany the smile you were forming, turning your head to me. "I can't wait to toss to you, Konoha-san."
I felt my lips forming a smirk. "Oh? Should I tell Shimano-san you're eying for the main setter position now?"
Your eyes, although slightly, widened. "That's not—"
You sighed as I laughed along, messing your hair a little before leading you to the gym, where the rest of the team was waiting for you with the biggest smile on their faces.
This was the worst.
When it came to sports—or well, life in general, I guess—there were days where everything just seemed... off. The timing of the ball touching one's hand. The feeling one felt at the tips of their fingers. The slight slip one's shoes made against the floor. There was just something wrong with a little something and everything, some small unimportant things, and although one couldn't really pinpoint exactly what, they could feel the effects as a whole.
That was how I'd been feeling all day today.
I didn't know what was it. It wasn't like there was anything wrong with my body, I'd been pretty healthy and no one in my class nor my family had some flu or something I could've caught. My social life was fine. My studies, well, my grades had been a bit above average ever since elementary school and it hadn't changed now. Yes, absolutely nothing had changed. There should've been nothing wrong with me.
Yet none of my spikes went through today.
It was so frustrating. Granted, we only had a regular practice today, but still. My hands didn't feel right. My fingers felt like they were out of place. My feet didn't move exactly as I wanted them to. Ugh. If I said these, they would sound like some sort of lame excuses at how bad I'd been playing today. And next week the inter-high would begin...
"Konoha-san." Your voice surprised me when I was lost in thought with tap water showering my face. I turned my head, startled, resulting in my shirt's collar getting splashed all over. Dammit. I turned off the tap, wiping my face while changing my expression to a grin.
"Oh, Akaashi. What's up?" I asked, attempting to sound normal. My mind tried to not think of it, but at the back of my head I knew you'd noticed the slight dejection on my actions. You'd always been a perceptive guy, after all.
"Is something the matter?" See? You'd really noticed, I really couldn't expect anything less from you. But still, what should I say? I had no excuse to be lame like this. Maybe if I acted normal you'd let this slide for once. I pulled the most surprised face I could make.
"What's that? Nothing's the matter, all's good!" I said lightly, waving my hand a little, letting out a laughter. Oh, that was actually pretty good. As expected from me.
"Please don't lie, Konoha-san, I know you're pretty good at lying but those spikes aren't." Ah, goddammit, this junior. You really weren't cute, were you? This was where you were supposed to say 'ah, is that so?' then offer something like 'well if I can help you with anything, let me know' and drop the topic right then and there. But then again, that would be uncharacteristic of you, huh, Akaashi? "I don't really want to butt into things that are not my business, but if there's anything I could do—"
"I'm okay," I cut your words, surprising even myself. I silently sighed at myself. 'If you couldn't lie your way out of it, then go all out and be completely honest', huh. I wonder who'd told that to me before. "I don't have things in my mind or anything, honest," I continued, my hands found their ways to each other, fingers playing and intertwining. "My studies are fine, my family is fine, my social life is fine—well I could use a girlfriend or something I guess but—" I paused for a chuckle. "Well, I don't have an excuse for how bad I've been all day today." Ah, it all came out so easily. I pulled a bitter smile at my own expense. "Which makes this super lame now, huh?"
You were quiet for a moment. I'm sorry this troublesome senpai had troubled you with his petty rant and now you didn't know what to answer. I was about to laugh my way out of there and turn my back to walk toward the gym when you suddenly said, "We all have that moment." I stopped moving completely mid-turn, my hands retreating to my sides. "I do, too," you added, you looked at me carefully as if reading my reaction to your every syllable. "Sometimes... Sometimes I just don't seem to know how to toss. Other times I can, but it just doesn't feel right. There doesn't have to be a reason. I guess our bodies just... do that."
I let out a discontent laugh. "Well, yeah, but—"
"Even Bokuto-san." This time it was you who cut my words. "Even Bokuto-san has those moments, and don't tell me you don't know that."
I fell silent for a moment. Well damn. It wasn't like I didn't know, but when you put it that way. Damn. It wasn't like we were arguing or anything, why did I feel like I'd just lost? "Yeah," I said, the grin on my face may look the same as the one I had seconds earlier, but this one wasn't forced. "Yeah, you're right, though it kinda hurts me to think I have whatever Bokuto has." I heard you snort quietly, and I had to chuckle along. "But yeah... You're right. Thanks, Akaashi."
"No problem," you said, I noticed a slight relief in your tone as your lips curved barely a smile. "If you need to talk about anything, I'm here to listen, most of the time."
I laughed. "Oi, you're supposed to say 'always' there!"
No matter how better I felt after talking to you, though, I still played pretty badly for the rest of practice. I guessed life wasn't as easy as that.
I was, however, in my top condition in inter-high a week later.
I was thinking of you when I saw you approaching me that day. God, it sounded so cheesy, but that was literally what happened.
It was Sunday, a week before Bokuto's birthday, and a little over two weeks before mine. Well, it wasn't like I was there to buy a present for him, I was there to look and shop around for myself. But you know, if there was something my eyes caught that I thought he would like, I'd probably get it for him, or something. The only problem was I could totally see Bokuto liking half the things here, so buying one wasn't going to be as much of a challenge as choosing one.
I sighed while randomly taking an owl picture frame from display, examining it a bit before setting it down again. Man, I should've invited the others, too. Saru and Washio were great at picking stuff, and Komiyan sometimes could have some really fantastic gift ideas. And then there was you... Hmm. You know what, I'd never gone present-hunting with you before, maybe I should've invited you to find out. Plus, there was a new cafe downstairs that I thought you'd like—
Huh.
"Akaashi?"
"Hello, Konoha-san," you greeted, lowering your head a bit at my startled face. "I was about to surprise you but it seemed that you've caught me before I could," you said in almost a monotone voice and face, and for some reason I felt a slight change in temperature in my cheeks.
"Well, you could've done a better job at it than walking directly in front of my eyes, you know," I said while shaking my head, chuckling. "Man, I was actually just thinking of you," I said. ...Wait, I said what? What was with that lame pick-up line-like sentence? I almost facepalmed to myself.
"Oh?" was your short reply, face piquing with interest. Oh well, I'd said it and there was no harm in telling the truth altogether.
"Yeah well, there's a cafe downstairs that I thought you'd like," I answered, stuffing my hands to my pockets. "I remember you said you like coffee, right? I heard their espresso's really good."
"I do, I do like a good cup of coffee," you replied with a small smile that made the fingers in my pockets moving uneasily. "What are you doing here today, Konoha-san?"
"Huh? Ah, nothing, just walking around aimlessly," I answered with a snicker. "And I guess I'll buy something for Bokuto if I can find something... Well, if I can choose something, I mean. There's too many stuff to choose from in this place."
"Ah," you said, letting out a soft chuckle. "He was pretty passive aggressive about it last practice, wasn't he?"
"Yeaaaah, he was like that last year, too. And it's gonna be such a pain if he sulks, man," I replied with an annoyed huff, scratching the back of my head. "Well, you know best, don't you."
You chuckled a little more. "I unfortunately do."
I smiled as I saw the last traces of your chuckles, smiling myself while pulling my other hand out of my pocket. "And you? What are you doing here?"
"My mother asked me to get some cakes," you said, holding up a white box with some words that I assumed to be French on it. "And like you, I was wandering around to see if there's anything Bokuto-san would like."
"Damn that guy, making us waste our precious weekend like this," I said, immediately letting out a laughter, which you followed with a smile. "Since we're looking for the same thing, you wanna go around together, then? We can go to the coffee place too later if you want."
You nodded slightly. "That sounds reasonable. And yes, I would like that."
I wondered if my grin was a little too wide for the rest of that day.
"Guess who's going out with Wakana-chan now~"
"...What?! But you—how?!"
"I told you I gave her a chocolate on Valentine's Day, right? She returned it today and said yes to my confession."
"That—you—well, damn it. Congrats, Komiyan. Damn it."
"Which one is it..."
I let out a long sigh remembering the conversation I had before practice earlier. Maaan. Okay, it wasn't like I was jealous or anything, okay? It's just that I kind of wanted to have a girlfriend too, hey, we were high schoolers, of course we wanted something like that. Okay, maybe I was a bit jealous. Well I did have a girlfriend in second grade, but it ended as quick as it started. She'd been the one who confessed to me, and at the time I didn't have anyone I liked, so I said yes. Long story short, a little more than a month later, she'd said she couldn't compete with volleyball for me, so she wanted to break up. What was that all about...
Speaking of confessions, someone actually had confessed to me last month, on Valentine's Day nevertheless! Man, that was a high school boy's dream. That was, but unfortunately my circumstances were different than one and a half years ago. It would be unfair for her if I accepted her confession while I had someone else I was interested in, so I ended up saying no... Aaaah, now that I thought of it again, what a waste...! I wouldn't have to feel this way right now had I said yes to her... I wouldn't have to mope around my three years of high school of barely having any romance going on... That was what I thought, but I knew if I'd gone back to that time again right now, my answer would still be the same. Sigh.
"Oh, it's Konoha-san. What are you doing at this kind of place?"
I turned my head absentmindedly to the voice. Oh. It was you. "I'm moping. What are you doing at this kind of place?"
"Moping?" you asked, face confused as you walked closer toward me. "I just finished locking up and I thought I heard someone behind the gym, so I went to see."
"'S that so," I answered, shifting my position to the side when you looked like you were going to sit beside me. You eyed me closely as you sat down, visibly curious of what I'd said earlier, and I almost laughed at your expression and curiosity. I let out a loud sigh instead. "I can't believe that Komiyan got a girlfriend..."
You chuckled immediately, the confusion and slight worry you had dissolved into a relieved smile. It seemed that you were expecting completely something else. "Well, Komi-san has liked her for quite some time, hasn't he? So it's a happy ending."
"Yeaaaah," I said, letting out another sigh, leaning forward a little. "But, you know, that Komiyan! It's so frustrating that he gets a girlfriend before I do!"
Your chuckle, for some reason, slowly faded off after I said that, and your face went back to your usual expressionless look. I glanced at you curiously. Huh, what happened there? You looked like you wanted to say something, and I continued to stare without saying anything before you did. "Didn't a girl give you a chocolate on Valentine's Day?"
...Wait, huh. What? Did I tell you about it? No, I didn't, I was sure I didn't tell anyone, not even Komiyan. So how did you know about it? Did you by any chance know the girl? But she was someone from my grade and was rather a quiet one, it would be strange if you knew her, though not impossible. Or did you happen to pass by and see it, by any chance? That seemed to be a more plausible explanation... Ah, whichever it was, that was considerate of you to not bring it up around me. Well, until now, at least.
"Yeah, but... Yeah," I replied vaguely, deciding not to ask how exactly you'd known about it while not really giving a response to your question either. There was no way I could answer that. "How 'bout you?" I tried to steer away from the topic, catching your gaze. It seemed like the question caught you off-guard as you looked a bit surprised by it.
"Sorry?" you voiced out your confusion. I glanced at you and couldn't help but let out a chuckle.
"How about you? Don't you want a girlfriend or some sort?" I asked, my fingers mindlessly reaching the fabric of my trousers, playing with it. "It's frustrating but you're insanely popular y'know, Akaashi-kun? Even girls in my class know about you."
You seemed reluctant for a bit before answering, "I don't know. I guess I've never really thought about it." I let out a quiet scoff.
"Uwah, there it is. The popular guy's catchphrase, 'I've never thought about girls or romance'," I said, shaking my head with a snort, leaning forward to give you some light smacks on the shoulder. Damn, this kid! You scratched the back of your ear for a moment, seemingly unsure of what to say next.
"Well, I've just... never gone out with someone before," you answered finally, eyeing my reaction, and I gave you a raised eyebrow and fastened blinks. Huh. Interesting. Akaashi Keiji, second year of high school, a pretty popular guy, had never gone out with someone before. I felt the edges of my lips curving into a grin. Heeeh. That so. Never gone out with someone, huh. Maybe I shall tease you a bit.
"Well," I started, there were nothing but mischievous glints in my eyes, and it looked like you noticed them too as your lips were starting to form a frown in response. But I knew, I knew what those glints were actually trying to hide, what my smirk was wanting to conceal. I could feel my heart thumping against the calm, playful facade I was pulling as I gripped the the side of my trousers. "You wanna try it with me, then?"
Yeah, I only said it to mess with you. I knew that. But still, I really hoped you didn't notice the slight tremble in my sing-song tone afterward as I asked, "You're single, I'm single, what do you say we go out together, you and me~?"
I knew what you'd answer with. 'What are you talking about, Konoha-san', or 'don't joke about something like that.' Oh, or would it be 'are you that desperate for a significant other, Konoha-san'? Whichever it was, I was looking forward to it.
After spending almost two years as teammates together, you would've thought I'd known better than expecting a normal, predictable answer from you.