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The house hadn’t changed, but the land had swallowed it more.
Dean stood at the edge of the driveway, keys in hand, boots kicking at red clay, eyes cast over the once white wood that peeled like old skin. The screen door flapped in the breeze. The porch sagged like it was tired of holding everyone else’s grief. A crow perched on the dead electric line above the roof, watching him like it knew things Dean couldn’t say out loud.
He hadn’t meant to stay longer than the funeral.
“Just a night,” he’d told Sam, who didn’t believe him, but didn’t argue either. Sam never did anymore.
Inside, everything smelled of dust and citrus cleaner, and Dean hated how muscle memory still let him find the lightswitch without looking.
He should’ve gone back to the motel.
Instead, he found himself at the church. Or what was left of it.
Stained glass like shattered ribs. The pews all gone, the altar stripped bare. Vines climbed the walls like hands reaching toward something that never came.
That’s where he saw him.
Castiel.
Sitting on the steps of the old chapel like he was waiting to be remembered.
The years hadn’t softened him. His hair was shorter now, curlier in the humidity. There were more lines around his eyes, deeper shadows under them. But his hands were the same quiet, still, like he was always holding something invisible.
Dean didn’t speak.
Cas didn’t look up.
“You still sneak out to cry here?” Dean asked, voice rough.
Cas’s mouth twitched. “Not since I stopped believing.”
Dean walked closer, boots loud on broken stone. “That right?”
Cas shrugged. “God left a long time ago. Just figured I’d follow.”
Dean sat beside him. The step was cracked. His knee touched Cas’s, just barely.
They didn’t talk for a long time.
The sun dipped behind the trees. Cicadas screamed like they were being punished.
“How long you stayin’?” Cas asked.
Dean didn’t know. He wanted to say “forever” and mean “until you ask me to leave.”
“Don’t know,” he said instead.
Cas nodded, like that answer made sense.
There was dirt under his fingernails. A faint scar under his left eye. Dean remembered how he got it. A bar fight with a trucker, back when they were nineteen and stupid. Dean had stitched him up in a field behind the diner, hands shaking. He kissed him that night. Once. It tasted like blood and something holy.
They never spoke of it again.
Dean wanted to ask him if he remembered. Wanted to ask if it haunted him too. But the words felt like sins caught in his throat.
“You look different,” Cas said suddenly.
Dean blinked. “Worse?”
Cas tilted his head, soft smile ghosting over his face. “Older. Quieter.”
“Yeah, well. Life.”
Cas hummed. “You still run from it?”
Dean swallowed hard. “Only the parts that matter.”
Another silence. This one meaner.
“You ever wonder,” Cas murmured, “what it would’ve been like if you’d stayed?”
Dean’s chest cracked wide open. The question was a knife he’d kept buried for years.
“All the time,” he whispered.
Cas turned to him, and Dean couldn’t breathe.
There was something about the way Cas looked at him. Like the whole world could end and he wouldn’t blink so long as Dean didn’t disappear again.
“I waited,” Cas said.
Dean clenched his fists. “I know.”
“You didn’t write.”
“I couldn’t.”
Cas nodded. “You were scared.”
Dean looked at him then, full on. “Aren’t you?”
Cas gave him a long, measured look. “Not anymore.”
Dean reached out before he could stop himself. His fingers brushed the inside of Cas’s wrist. Skin to skin. Warm. Familiar.
Not strangers.
Not anymore.
“I wanted to stay,” Dean confessed, voice breaking. “God, Cas, I wanted to. But this town this place it made me feel like I had to kill pieces of myself just to keep breathing.”
Cas leaned in, forehead nearly touching Dean’s. “You didn’t have to kill them. You just had to give them to someone who wouldn’t throw them away.”
Dean’s breath hitched.
“Do you still have that piece of me?” he asked, barely above a whisper.
Cas’s smile was bitter and soft. “I’ve never known how to put it down.”
The kiss was slow. Not desperate, not rushed. Just… reverent.
Like a prayer that finally got answered.
They didn’t make promises.
Didn’t say forever.
But when they sat together on the steps, night bleeding into morning, Dean reached for Cas’s hand and held it like he’d been drowning for years.
And for once, Cas let him.
Dean hadn’t meant to fall asleep there, in the ruined chapel with the stone under his spine and morning light pushing through the stained glass like it had somewhere better to be.
But Cas was beside him.
And he was warm.
And after everything the years, the guilt, the silence Dean had felt something close to peace.
Maybe not perfect. Maybe not enough to drown the ghosts.
But peace, still.
Cas was already awake when Dean opened his eyes. Sitting up, hands laced in his lap, watching the sun filter through broken colors.
“You always wake up this early?” Dean asked, voice rough with sleep.
Cas looked over at him, lips curving just slightly. “Only when I’m not alone.”
Dean stretched, groaning at the crack in his back. “This floor’s gonna kill me.”
“I did offer my shoulder,” Cas said.
Dean smiled. “I wasn’t sure if that was real.”
Cas shrugged. “You were, and you took it. I didn’t stop you.”
They left the church together. The air was heavy with the scent of honeysuckle and wet earth. Summer in Kansas clung to your skin, but it wasn’t suffocating the way it used to be.
Dean followed Cas home.
And for the first time, it felt like a home not just the old house with sagging walls and peeling paint, but something alive in it. Like someone had loved the place even when no one else had.
Cas poured coffee into two chipped mugs and handed one to Dean without speaking.
“Can I ask you something?” Dean said.
Cas nodded.
“Why didn’t you ever leave?”
Cas leaned against the counter. Thought about it.
“I almost did,” he admitted. “More than once. But… I guess I was waiting. Maybe stupidly.”
Dean looked at him over the rim of his mug. “Waiting for what?”
Cas met his eyes.
“For you to come back and stop pretending you didn’t want to.”
Dean looked away, heart thudding, throat tight.
“I didn’t know how,” he said quietly. “Didn’t know if I was allowed to want this.”
Cas stepped closer. His voice gentled. “You always were. You just didn’t believe it yet.”
Dean nodded slowly. Then smiled, tentative. “Well. I’m starting to.”
They spent the day doing nothing, and everything.
They went to the market, where the old lady at the flower stall still remembered them as “those two boys who used to fight behind the chapel and leave looking guilty.”
Cas laughed. Dean flushed.
They bought fresh peaches and lemonade and fixed the porch swing. Cas had kept it, all these years, even though the chain had rusted and one of the planks was split. Dean patched it up with stubborn pride and half a dozen curse words.
They sat on it that night, shoulder to shoulder, drinking something cold and listening to the sound of cicadas in the trees.
Dean’s fingers found Cas’s again. No hesitation this time. No fear.
“I want to stay,” Dean said softly.
Cas turned toward him. “Then stay.”
Dean looked out over the yard, where fireflies blinked in and out of the dark. “It won’t be easy.”
“I don’t need easy,” Cas said. “I just need you.”
Dean leaned his head on Cas’s shoulder, felt the weight of everything they weren’t saying settle between them like something sacred. Like they didn’t need to rush.
He kissed him again, slower than last night. Clearer.
And this time, it didn’t feel like a secret.
It felt like home.
They sat there until the stars came out.
And Dean knew really knew that he wasn’t running anymore.
Not from this place.
Not from Cas.
Not from the part of himself that had always wanted to be held.
Later, lying in bed with Cas’s breath warm on his neck and the hum of summer outside the window, Dean whispered, “We’re not strangers anymore.”
Cas whispered back, “We never were.”
