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The Cutest God In The Forest

Summary:

'There must have been an earthquake just before my ascension, how unfortunate', he thought to himself. Xie Lian sheepishly took a couple of steps forward, unsure of where to go at a time like this. In search of someone to help out amidst the chaos of broken palaces, his gaze caught that of a towering figure approaching him with a powerful stride. Xie Lian could recognize that figure anywhere, it was the heavenly emperor himself.

“Xianle.”

Jun Wu stands before him with a look of exasperated disappointment. He sighs, “Xianle truly has caused the heavenly realm quite the ruckus.”

Or: Xie Lian´s third ascension is so devastating to the heavenly realm that Jun Wu chooses to put a very particular cursed shackle on Xie Lian, one that forces him into having the form of a stoat!

Notes:

HELLO TGCF FANDOM ON AO3<33
This is my absolute first serious try at fanfics so please grant me some grace as a beginner hahha (id love to hear your thoughts in the comments though!). May the power of neo divergency and a TGCF hyper-fixation carry this fanfic forth! Well, hope you enjoy!

ps: This work is inspired by: A Soft Spot for Stoats by elixwilde :)

Chapter Text

Stray snowflakes melt against flaming cheeks as Xie Lian gaze up at the sky. It was filled with the freshest flakes of the year's first snowfall, watching them calmly find their way down to the mud at his feet.

He was almost grateful for the promise of winter they brought. He has had enough of this autumm´s downpour soaking through his cotton robes. Though thick and scratchy as they might be, the rain always seemed able to seep its way in– making his skin awfully damp just in time for him to find some shelter for the night. Absent-mindedly his hand found itself scratching dreadfully at his bandaged neck at the mere thought.

Xie Lian's luck seemed to have reached unattainable heights this past week as he'd made his way to a bigger city– making him trip over a sprinting mouse. Not wanting to crush the poor rodent he had stumbled right into a stall selling intricate headpieces.

Head crashing against the table had made the unstable structure glide in the mud and rattle violently, and made multiple headpieces fall. The shop lady's cheeks had grown even redder than the extensive makeup on her cheeks could have ever managed. With a fist, a broom and many venomous words she had chased Xie Lian all the way out of the city. Xie Lian had once again been grateful for his stamina as a former martial god as it saved him from being literally brushed out of the market.

He hadn't even been able to utter a single apology, useless as it might have been. Truly his luck. He had planned to scrap collect some more valuable pieces than one might not find in a poor farmers village in hope to buy a more waterproof coat.

With a sigh Xie Lian gazed around, the lady had chased him to the outskirts of the City so maybe he should just take it as a sign to take a walk in the forest, free of human life he could plague, and find shelter under a dense enough tree. His head throbbed from the hit anyways so the lack of noise was nice.

“This might even be for the bett-” before he even got to finish his sentence his robes were caught in unnaturally strong winds seemingly trying to drag him upwards. It took him barely a second to realize what was happening but the golden light had already caught him in its grasp as his body was dragged up by heaven's force into the realm of gods.

 

Xie Lian had expected the heavenly realm to stand proudly before him, all classy sterile marble floors and grand palaces lined with gold. But as he stood at the entrance his senses were bombarded with desperate cries of heavenly officials, the view of grand palaces caving in on themselves and the undeniable sensation of the ground rumbling slightly. The saying “all days are good in heaven” was truly proven wrong in the face of such astounding chaos.

'There must have been an earthquake just before my ascension, how unfortunate', he thought to himself. Xie Lian sheepishly took a couple of steps forward, unsure of where to go at a time like this. In search of someone to help out amidst the chaos of broken palaces, his gaze caught that of a towering figure approaching him with a powerful stride. Xie Lian could recognize that figure anywhere, it was the heavenly emperor himself.

“Xianle.”

Jun Wu stands before him with a look of exasperated disappointment. He sighs, “Xianle truly has caused the heavenly realm quite the ruckus.” He takes a few more deliberate steps closer, towering over Xie Lian with a hard glint in his eyes. “It seems I was wrong to grant that shackle of yours when its effects seem to be a plague on those around you.”

Xie Lian was thrown off by that, but of course it was him who brought this misfortune. He felt a shame climb its way up his collar bones, his skin was thick, but not that thick. He could handle being guilty for most things, but inadvertently causing the collapse of multitudes of heavenly structures must be a new high even for him. Xie Lian didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

”Your Majesty this Xianle will immediately start working hard to repay the damages. I have no other duties keeping me away.” Jun Wu was silent for a moment, eyes gazing over the fallen god before him. “There are no duties for you here anymore, the heavenly officials no longer accept your precance and want you gone for good.”

Xie Lian froze and choked on air, 'gone for good?´, for the first time since his second banishment the possibility that this was it came to him. If Xie Lian would've been told this his prior ascension he might have taken the punishment wholly and willingly. Maybe even gratefully.

Almost curiously he found that now he had the instinct to back away, to run. As if reading his mind Jun Wu took yet another step closer, grabbing his hand sternly. Xie Lian met Jun Wu's icy irises and saw only determined resignation. Something in Jun Wu had changed and Xie Lian could no longer see a long lost mentor or idol. The aura he emanated was more that of a disgruntled judge, a higher power about to serve him his sentence. Whatever Jun Wu had meant by gone for good, it was bound to happen now. Xie Lian knew there was no use in running, no use in arguing.

“It's time to seal you away, I had higher hopes for you Xianle.”

Before Xie Lian could utter a word of question he felt his body change, everything became gigantic all the while his bones dislodged and changed shape. He felt the odd sensation of fur rapidly growing all over his body and a tail emerging from his lower back. It was a horribly peculiar sensation he had never experienced, the only feeling he could compare it to is when his cursed shackle forces his body back into a functional state right after facing fatal damage. “What is happening?!” he tried exclaiming but all that came out was a distressed hiss.