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Lately, Mike had been getting a lot more annoying than usual. Zero could normally brush off his pranks and jokes, but this was getting ridiculous. It wasn't even April Fools anymore, for God's sake! Yet here he was waking up to tumbling down the stairs, his breakfast laced with extra strong laxatives, getting chased down an an angry berserker tusk. And the worst part of it all, Regian was out of town for a week, so he couldn't go to him for comfort.
So here he was, cautiously going about his day, keeping his eyes extra peeled for any signs of that green moron.
"Morning, Zero." A familiar voice chirped.
Zero jumped at the noise. He whipped around, and, lo an behold, there was Mike, standing innocently like he wasn't actively ruining his day.
"What do you want?" Zero demanded.
"What's the matter?" Mike giggled. "Can't I be nice?"
"Whatever, I'm not entertaining you." He huffed as he a turned to take his leave.
That turned out to be a mistake. As he triggered a tripwire, causing a bomb full of itching powder to explode all over him. As he stumbled back into a nearby tree, causing a bucket of molasses that was perched in the branches to splatter all over him. All the while, Mike was laughing his head off.
"You poor bastard." Mike panted as he wiped away tears. "Emphasis on the poor."
Okay, that was uncalled for. Zero's eye twitched. Time for some payback.
"If only your parents could see you now." Zero spat.
Mike wasn't laughing now. He could only stare at him with disbelieving eyes and a barely audible "W-what?"
"Struck a nerve, did I?" He scoffed. "They'd wonder where they went wrong with you. Hell, they'd probably kill you to stop you from causing any more damage and then kill themselves out of embarrass-"
He didn't get to finish that word when Mike screamed furiously, before throttling him in the jaw, sending him smashing through the tree and rolling across the pavement. After spitting up some blood and teeth, Zero dodged just in time to avoid Mike's foot from stomping on him. He retaliated by grabbing his foot before nailing his square in the groin. With that, Zero tackled Mike onto his back before unloading a barrage of punches to his face.
Suddenly, Mike, despite the blood obscuring his vision, was able to grab Zero's arm before he could land another punch. The white-haired man screamed in agony as the green-haired one squeezed his arm until the bone snapped and protruded out of his skin. His other hand wrapped around his throat, fully intending on strangling the life out of him. Just then their attention was grabbed by he sound of loud, desperate honking.
With just a split second to spare, they rolled out of the way just as an SUV sped past them with the driver shouting angry insults at them. Feeling Mike's grip loosen, Zero pried himself free by kicking Mike back. He then saw what was coming a quickly had an idea. He had to do it fast. Mike charged with murderous intent, only to be met with an energy blast. It wasn't very strong, all things considered, but it was enough to push him backwards and into the path of a speeding bus.
The bus came to a screeching halt several feet away, allowing Zero to have a full view of what was left of the green bastard; mangled limbs, flattened abdomen, that was somehow still rising and falling, and blood spurting from his mouth and nose with each breath, and more blood staining the seat of his pants.
Not wanting to stick around, Zero spat on Mike's dying body before limping off.