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Akaashi Keiji has two wonderful boyfriends, Bokuto Koutarou and Kuroo Tetsurou. Even though they are quite stupid when it comes to their shenanigans, their level of sweetness, caringness, and lovingness can skyrocket when both of their attentions are focused on Akaashi. Most of the time, Akaashi finds their small rivalry of trying to woo him endearing, but there are other times when he just wants to shove asparagus sticks up their asses. Today was one of those days.
Bokuto bounces to Akaashi, "Hey hey Akaashi! I can't believe you're owl mine!" Bokuto says while shoving a bouquet of roses to Akaashi's face.
Akaashi ignores the owl pun, and takes the flowers, "Thank you Bokuto-san. These are lovely." Akaashi smells the flowers and a small smile makes its way to his lips.
"Akaaaaaashiiii!!! You know what this bouquet of roses mean, right?" Akaashi stares blankly at Bokuto. "It means that owl love you forever and owlways!" Bokuto says with a sparkle in his eyes.
"Thank you Bokuto-san. I love you too." Akaashi says and walks away. He can't believe that Bokuto is trying to woo him with owl puns this time. Although the roses were a nice touch.
Akaashi was looking for a vase to put the roses in on the bottom cabinet of their kitchen when he heard, "Did you sit on a pile of sugar? Because you have a pretty sweet ass."
Akaashi rolled his eyes, "What do you need Kuroo-san?"
"C'mon Akaashi. Am I not allowed to appreciate my boyfriend's ass?"
Miraculously, Akaashi found a vase in the cabinet. He took it out and stood to place it on the counter. "You normally adore Bokuto-san's ass more than mine." Akaashi said as he filled the vase with water and placed the roses in it.
"Hmmm… that's true, but you have got to be a campfire because I want s'more of you." Akaashi looks at Kuroo just in time to see him wiggle his eyebrows while leaning against the wall trying to pull off a sexy pose.
"We don't need a campfire if you want s'mores. Just go to the store and we can make some here." Akaashi deadpans, and he heads to the living room to put the vase of roses on the coffee table.
Akaashi had just placed the roses on the table, and was about to sit on the couch to watch TV when Bokuto yelled, "HOOT HOOT! YOU'RE CUTE!" and slid across the floor on his knees with a box of chocolates.
"Thank you Bokuto-san." Akaashi said as he took the box of chocolates and sat down on the couch. Bokuto walked away slightly deflated and frustrated. Akaashi knew what was going on, and he wasn't going to indulge them.
Akaashi sat down, and turned on the TV. He settled for an old favorite show, Tom and Jerry. He opened the box of chocolates, and was about to eat one when Kuroo slid next to him with an arm over his shoulders and said in a sultry voice, "Your body is 65% water, and I'm thirsty."
"There's cold water in the fridge. I'd rather you drink that than try to deprive me of the water in my body." Akaashi deadpans.
Kuroo groans. They probably didn't expect me to be this difficult. Akaashi thinks. He was pulled out of his thoughts when Kuroo said, "Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious."
Akaashi sighs, "Kuroo-san, the three of us ate breakfast together. We had an American style breakfast that consisted of pancakes, bacon, and eggs." Akaashi gets up and goes to his office room, leaving an agitated Kuroo on the couch.
It's not even lunch time and Akaashi is already exhausted. It can't be any worse than this, right? Wrong. Throughout the day, Akaashi had to sneak around his own home to avoid his two boyfriends from saying or doing anything to woo him. He wasn't going to fall for any of them, but it was getting harder as time went by.
Akaashi went through countless owl puns from Bokuto like, "Akaashi!! Have you owlways looked like this? You are so hootiful!" and "Well, owl be damned. My boyfriend is gorgeous." and many more.
Akaashi also went through a lot of terrible pickup lines from Kuroo. Lines like, "I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true." and "My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow"?
Akaashi looked at the time, and it was almost time for dinner. It's his turn to cook, and he's hoping that neither of his boyfriends would bother him. Well, even if they did bother him, he can just kick them out by threatening them with no dinner. Bokuto and Kuroo always take food seriously. They won't risk not being able to eat their boyfriend's cooking.
Akaashi decided to make omelets with fried rice for his boyfriends. It's something they haven't had in a while. He made the fried rice and scooped generous amounts onto 3 plates. Then he fried 3 omelets and placed them on top of the fried rice. He placed the plates on the dining table and wrote short messages with a heart on the omelets with ketchup before calling his boyfriends for dinner. Bokuto and Kuroo sat where they usually sat. They thanked Akaashi for the meal, and were going to dig in when they saw a short message and heart on their omelets. Bokuto's omelet had "Owl love you forever" written on it. Kuroo's omelet had "Are you a tamale?" written on it. He looked at Akaashi in confusion. Akaashi didn't look at Kuroo, but could feel his questioning gaze, and said, "Cause you're hot." It took a moment for the pickup line to sink in, and Kuroo roared in laughter while Bokuto was crying and taking pictures of Akaashi's owl pun.
Bokuto and Kuroo got up and squished Akaashi in a hug. "What are you guys doing? Don't you want to eat?" Akaashi asked while squirming to get out of their hug.
"We love you Akaashi!" Bokuto and Kuroo said at the same time. At first, Akaashi didn't know what had gotten into his boyfriends, but later he realized that he had won their little game. It was something simple, but Akaashi knew his boyfriends were sappy. What he didn't know was how easy it was to woo them. If he had known this earlier, he would've done so many things to see them super happy, and possibly blushing.
Looking at his boyfriends now, Akaashi is just happy to see them eating the food he made with smiles on their faces. But there was something he didn't know about behind those happy faces. There was a silent conversation between Bokuto and Kuroo. Basically, Akaashi just fueled their rivalry of wooing him to another level, and he most definitely is not ready for it.