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'Artifacts from the USN frigate Abraham Lincoln' I read on the sign under the collection of maritime items assembled before me. I had managed to get into Washington D.C.'s Navy Museum, not without trouble as it was situated inside of a military base. Being a foreign citizen, I’d had to show my passport, which they’d scanned and taken a digital copy of, before filling in an online form on my phone. They’d then made me leave the phone at the reception, ‘for security reasons’, apparently. Christ, I was just there to see the Trieste . 

The worn wooden name plate belonging to the frigate was the largest item in its collection, each letter of the name Abraham Lincoln handsomely carved by a professional hand. There was still some remnants of the gold leaf to be seen here and there. Although I would normally never in my wildest imagination have thought to touch something in a museum, I reached out my hand. It was not a conscious decision so much as a relentless beckoning, I was like a moth to a flame. The second my fingers touched the weathered wood, I went blind, and all the sounds of the people around me at the museum disappeared, and I could smell salt in the air. A sea breeze? 

I did not know how much time had passed before I slowly started to regain consciousness. I realised I was laying in a bed. The first thing I saw when my eyes opened was a small, round window. ‘What an odd looking hospital room’, I remember thinking, and my opinion was cemented as I looked around. The walls were… metal? With bolted seams? Like a… My dazed mind tried to think what this reminded me of. I thought back, ‘where had I been before this strange room?’. Of course! The Navy Museum! And the room was a replica of a 19th century ship’s cabin. I must have fainted, and been placed in the nearest bed, despite it clearly being part of the exhibition. ‘God, this is so embarrassing!’ I tried to sit up, to get the hell out of there as soon as possible, I was absolutely mortified! I very quickly realised I was not in a state to move anywhere at all at the moment, and laid right back down, having to close my eyes to stop the room from spinning. 

No more than a few minutes after, the door opened, and a man in a very formal, grey-green three piece suit came in. He looked surprised to see me, and I could feel myself blushing, this is exactly what I was hoping to avoid. However, before I could get a word of explanation in, he shut the door, smiled at me and exclaimed: 

“Ah, mademoiselle, vous êtes réveillé!”

French? Why French? We were in the capital of the United States, why would he assume I spoke French? Admittedly, I did a little, but not enough to hold a conversation. My confused look must have tipped him off, because he yet again preceded me. 

“English, mademoiselle?” I nodded at him, and he seemed slightly uncomfortable at this, but smiled and said all the same, in a heavy accent: 

“You are finally awake. I’m glad. You have been unconscious for the past two days, ever since we rescued you.” Rescued me? Perhaps his translation was off. But two days? Surely not even the US Military would leave me laying unconscious in a museum exhibit for two days? My already groggy brain was struggling to comprehend what he could possibly mean. I realised, with some difficulty, that I must be somewhere else, but… 

“Where am I?” my voice was horribly hoarse, and I started coughing. The kind looking man was immediately at my side, with a glass of water from the bedside table. He sat down on the side of the bed and helped me drink a little. Then he put his hand to my forehead, and seemed to be examining me. He must have seen the look of bewildered confusion on my face, for he said in a calm voice:

“Calmez-vous, mademoiselle, I am a doctor. I have been looking after you.” Something in his demeanor made me instantly trust this man, despite his claim going against any logic. Was I in a hospital after all then? And why would a doctor be wearing a heavy wool suit? Now that I had a chance to examine it closer, I realised I’d never seen a suit quite like it before. It looked as though it belonged in the museum exhibit rather than the hospital, along with everything else in the small room…

“How are you feeling, mademoiselle?” I was too caught up in the strangeness of the situation to even realise he’d asked me a question.

“Where am I?” I repeated, clearer this time.

“Mademoiselle, you are aboard the Abraham Lincoln!”

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“Mademoiselle, you are aboard the Abraham Lincoln!”

At that, my brain almost fully short-circuited. The 19th century Naval ship, whose remains I’d seen in the museum? How could I possibly be ‘aboard’ that ship? Then, as if being hit by a tidal wave, I remembered. I remembered touching the old wooden name plate of this very ship, and then the museum falling away from my consciousness, to be replaced by… 

I was drowning, suffocating. There was cold sea water all around me, above me, and where was the surface? I kicked my legs furiously, searching for air, for purchase, but found neither.

“We found you, floating here, in the middle of the Pacific, no parts of a shipwreck to be seen, so you have been floating for quite some time. And it being almost winter! I do not understand how you were alive when they hauled you up.” He looked at me, concerned, and I looked back at him absolutely perplexed. What did he mean, ‘almost winter’? It was May!

“What day is this?” I croaked.

“It is November the 2nd, mademoiselle,” said the doctor helpfully. I did not care how strange my next question would seem:

“And what year?” He laughed softly at this.

“Why, you weren’t floating in the sea for that long, it is still 1867!”

I think I lost consciousness again at this, it was simply too much to take in. I don’t know how much time had passed before I awoke again, but the doctor was still in the room, now seated at the small table opposite the bed, reading a book. When he noticed I was once again conscious, he urged me to drink a little more, and offered me a hardtack. 

“I apologise, there is little else onboard that your stomach could handle at the moment, mademoiselle. We have been at sea for many months now, but fortune is with you still, for the Captain has announced that if we do not sight the beast in the next three days, we shall give up our venture and return to New York!” The beast? For every piece of information I got, the mystery only thickened. I felt hopeless, and was close to tears. The doctor seemed to guess at the cause of my desolation, and with a sympathetic smile, he once again came to sit at my bedside. He gently took my hand. 

“Please, allow me to introduce myself. I am Pierre Aronnax, professor at the Paris Museum of Natural History. Who have I had the pleasure of treating these past few days?” This brought me back to the present. I looked up at the man who, even though I didn’t know it yet, would be my anchor through this difficult, but wondrous, adventure. Pierre. Perhaps I did already suspect what he would come to mean to me when I answered him truthfully:

“My name is Eleonora.”

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Professor Aronnax, seated back at the table, questioned me about what ship I had been travelling on, and what had happened for me to end up in the water. Had we suffered a ship wreck, or had I fallen overboard without being noticed? Or was the cause more sinister? Had we perhaps been attacked by the mysterious beast they were hunting? His eyes lit up at this possibility, but I had to give him the same answer as I had to everything else. I didn’t know. It was partly true of course, I didn’t know how I’d ended up in the Pacific Ocean in 1867, but I thought it best to feign complete memory loss before I could figure out what to do about my situation. But the professor was an intelligent man, very insightful, and he saw through my facade.  

“Mademoiselle, I understand if you do not feel comfortable telling me exactly who you are or what happened to you, you must have good reason to hide your identity, seeing how you were dressed as a man.” I stared at him. What could he possibly mean? But he mistook my confusion for fear, and he hastened to say:

“Please, worry not yourself, I have not told anyone onboard. They brought you straight to me after you were rescued and no one else had a chance to notice. I hope you will forgive me, but the situation demanded that I remove your wet clothing, or you would have suffered pneumonia and most likely death.” I tried to understand what he was telling me. I pulled myself up so that I was sitting against the headboard, and only then did I notice that I was indeed not wearing my own 21st century clothing, but just a large poet shirt under the covers. Although, I suppose, no one here would know what I meant if I called it that. My own clothes, I saw, were hanging on the chair not occupied by the professor. A pair of brown linen trousers, and an oversized striped cotton shirt. Yeah, I suppose I see why these people would assume I was a man, or rather, a boy. My shoes, some cheap mules from Zara, must have slipped off while I was in the water, or the crew would have had a much harder time pinning me as a man. I supposed they must have simply accepted my long hair, perhaps it wasn’t even strange in this day and age, I didn’t know. 

“No, of course, I understand. Thank you, professor.” I said, and tried to give him a reassuring smile, and he seemed to relax. I have often wondered why I, rather than believing Professor Aronnax a kidnapper and a madman, choose to accept the impossible in what he was telling me. I didn’t have any proof of having time travelled, apart from the look of the room I was in, and his unusual costume. I have come to the conclusion that Pierre Aronnax is simply one of those rare people who are absolutely honest before anything else, which shines through his whole person, even to a stranger. This was also sometimes to his detriment, as you know, since he was incapable of any sort of misleading or concealment.

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Over the next few days, with the gentle treatment from Professor Aronnax, I started feeling better, at least physically. I still could not leave my cabin, which was perhaps for the best, for I had no idea how I was to explain the circumstances of me being onboard the Abraham Lincoln to less understanding members of the crew. I also worried for the fact that I did not know how I was to keep up my appearance of being a man for the months it would take to travel back to New York, and what danger me being found out might bring. For the time being, I assumed the professor had told the captain that I was not yet well enough to see anyone else, since no one had come to question me here. The only other person I had seen was the professor’s servant, a man named Conseil, whom the professor assured me could be trusted. I did hear him speak to another man outside the door one day, in French, of which I understood enough to grasp that the man was asking how I was. When Aronnax came in, he explained that the man was Ned Land, the harpooner on board, who had been the one to spot me in the water, and therefore felt a certain responsibility towards me. 

Whenever the professor could spare a moment, he sat with me, talking, and would show me his sketchbook. He was a talented artist, and could capture the likeness and movement of the seabirds and cetaceans he’d seen in just a few lines. Being something of an artist myself, although nowhere near as gifted, I was well impressed and sang his praises. Even though he seemed to appreciate my compliments, they made him a bit bashful, he was a very modest man. He must have been in his forties, but sometimes his expressions made him look like he was no more than a boy. I found it endearing, despite him being more than a decade my senior. I think he must have been considered quite handsome, but I appreciated him for his kindness, his intelligence, and his friendship. I think he enjoyed conversing with me, and I was grateful for it, since it took my mind off my bizarre situation. We spoke mostly of the fauna to be seen around us, and he could not believe I’d not heard of the beast the Abraham Lincoln was hunting, so he relayed the whole story to me, including his theories. I was in awe, I could not fathom what animal it could possibly be, and asserted that the professor was too educated to believe in the sea monsters of old. I jokingly said the beast must be looking for captain Ahab, but then panicked, I could not remember if the book had been written yet! Luckily, Aronnax laughed and replied that, if it was, it would find him aboard our ship.

On the evening on November 5th, I was well enough to have dressed in my own clothes, and was eating a bit of supper at my small table. My food was always delivered by the professor’s servant, as he did not wish anyone else to enter my room before we had come up with a plausible story for me. This issue would however prove to be nonexistent very soon. I suddenly heard a shout, and there was a great deal of commotion on deck. What had happened? The frigate seemed to be maneuvering violently. I could not risk leaving my room, but it did not take an hour before Aronnax came rushing in, terribly excited, and announced that the beast had been sighted. We would not pursue it until daylight, but I could not go to sleep, so I stood at my porthole to get a glimpse of this strange creature. At two o’clock in the morning, I saw the strange light the professor had spoken of, far away in the distance. To me, it looked like the underwater spotlights the yachts I’d seen in Italy use, that attract the little fish in the harbour at night. It looked nothing like a phosphorescent animal. When nothing happened for several hours, I decided to get some sleep after all. 

I was awoken close to noon by the professor entering, and he was in a state, his dark blonde hair on end and looking absolutely bewildered.

“It circled us! We are running at twenty knots and it circled us!” Now I too was bewildered. What sea animal is that fast? My suspicion was growing, but I wasn’t quite ready to voice it yet. Later, I heard cannon shots, but no cheers to indicate they had hit. The chase continued, and evening came. At 11 o’clock, I noticed the light again, getting closer to us. Were we to be attacked and sunk, like the other ships the professor had told me about? But no, I realised that it was actually us approaching the ‘beast’. When it did not move, my curiosity got the better of me, and I simply had to leave my cabin to get a better look from up on deck. Everyone were, as I’d hoped, so focused on our target that they failed to notice me. I went up to where Aronnax and Conseil were stood, and looked on with the same breathlessness as the rest of the crew as we were almost upon the light. A man who must have been Ned Land was perched below us, and when his harpoon struck the surface with a metallic clang, my suspicion was confirmed. I gasped, but had no time to tell the professor, before we were drenched by the submarine’s waterspouts. A collision occurred, and I was thrown over the forecastle’s rail and back into the sea.

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This time around, I was conscious in the waves, and was panicking as I saw the frigate moving further and further away. I am normally a capable swimmer, it being a mandatory skill in school in my time, and even though the sea was relatively calm, I was almost drowning. My head kept going below the surface, as I desperately tried to wave to the ship, but it was no use. I thought I could hear a voice shouting, but coming from behind me? A large wave came over me, and I was struggling to find my way back to the surface. Seconds later, I could feel a strong arm grip me, and tow me backwards. I was coughing, and gasping for air, but soon the strong arm pulled me up onto an islet. I was saved! But by whom? I looked back, and saw a tall, muscular man with his hands on his knees, breathing heavily. I didn’t recognise him at first, having only seen him before the once, a moment from afar, and he saw my questioning look.

“Ned Land, your rescuer once again, at your service,” he said, sarcastically. 

“Th-thank you,” I managed, still too shaken to form a coherent thought. 

“Well, who would have thought the monster was to become our salvation, eh?” Ned Land continued in the same tone. What did he mean? I had to think for a moment before remembering my realisation from just before the accident. The submarine! I was suddenly hyper-aware of my surroundings, and saw that indeed, I had been right. We weren’t perched on top of an islet at all, but the very thing who had caused our distress! 

I told the harpooner of my theory, and he agreed that, as unbelievable as it was, we found ourselves atop the evidence. We debated whether to try and contact the inhabitants of this vessel, but due to the fact that we had to consider them enemies, we choose not to, as long as it was laying still on the surface. After that, there was little to do but wait. We hoped that the frigate, or one of its life boats would return for us, but after three hours they still had not. All seemed hopeless, when suddenly we heard a faint cry in the distance. 

“À nous! À nous!”

Ned Land stood up, and scanned for the source, and with a mighty voice called out;

“Par ici!”

I was overjoyed to see the professor again at first, but instantly felt guilty, realising nothing in our situation had changed, and now he and Conseil were doomed as well. Once the professor quickened, he looked at myself and Ned Land.

“Ned! Eleonora!” 

“Eleonora?” the harpooner exclaimed. “Une femme?"

The professor had in his weakened state revealed my secret, and quickly had to explain to Ned the reasoning behind it. He eyed me suspiciously, but before he could begin an interrogation, Aronnax started questioning us about the surface on which we were stood. A lively discussion followed, and was only interrupted by the submarine starting to move. For several hours we were holding on, and Mr. Land seemed to have entirely given up questioning me for the time being. It was one of the strangest nights of my life, holding on to a mooring ring atop a submarine, the waves splashing us, and I could have sworn I heard the sound of music, coming from the sea. 

Soon after daybreak, the next disaster occurred. The submarine started to go below the waves, and Ned Land banged on the hull, desperate to be heard. And he was.

After having spent half an hour in the pitch black room into which we’d been thrown, the ceiling light came on. It was electric, which I naturally thought nothing of at first, but Aronnax seemed fascinated, and I realised this was indeed unusual. The door opened, and revealed two men. Had I not later gotten to know Kumar, I could not have described him from this first meeting, for my eyes were instantly fixed to the man next to him. I barely know where to begin in explaining this man. He seemed to me like the kings of old, tall, proud, noble, with an air so powerful and trustworthy you felt compelled to obey him. His dark eyes held an intelligence which was so piercing it made it difficult to meet his gaze, for it felt as if he could read you like an open book. His hair was black, and slightly wavey, and he had a full beard which stood in contrast to his sensuous mouth. Standing in his presence was like standing in the sun. 

I believe we all stared at him as he examined us, and then he spoke a few words in a deep, melodious voice to his companion. At first I thought I was so dazed by this meeting that I hadn’t perceived what he said, but soon realised that they spoke an unfamiliar language. Aronnax started to tell our story in French, encouraged by Conseil, and began to introduce us, but when he came to my name, he hesitated for just a split second. Most people would not have caught his hesitation before naming me as ‘Elliot, a shipwrecked boy we rescued just a week ago’, but I could see the tall man’s eyes flash to me for a moment. Had I not been so enraptured by this man, my previous worry of what would happen were I to be found out, might have been at the top of my mind. Aronnax clearly deemed it unsafe to entrust these men with the knowledge that there was a woman onboard, and both Conseil and even Ned Land were protective enough to stick with his version of my story. Although Ned felt the need to add that I clearly had ‘a certain penchant for being shipwrecked’. Once they had relayed the story four times, in four different languages, with no apparent reaction from the two men at the door, the professor turned to me. 

“Elliot, do you perhaps speak any fifth language we could try with these gentlemen?” I did actually, but having had a little time to recover my wits at this point, I just shook my head.

“No, monsieur.” I tried to make my voice deeper without sounding conspicuous, but I must have failed, for at a signal from the taller man, his companion came into the room and grabbed me. All three of my friends were immediately upon him, but a third man then appeared at the door, pointing a rifle at them. They had no choice but to back down, but Ned Land was shouting profanities at our captors, while the professor tried to reason with them, calling out that it was inhumane! I was soon out the door, and taken down the passageway to a different room, where the door was locked behind me.

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I looked around the space I was now in, which was also flooded by the electrical light. It was a comfortable stateroom, with a large, single bed, a wardrobe, a desk and chair, and a basin with a mirrored cabinet above. The only thing lacking was a porthole. I looked in the wardrobe for a change of clothes, as I was starting to shiver in my wet garments, but found it empty. Luckily, it did not take long before the door was opened again, and a steward came in. He bowed slightly, and laid a pile of fresh clothes on the foot of the bed. He then came in with a tray of food, which he set down on the desk. He bent his head again, left the room and locked the door behind him. I quickly changed into the dry clothes, which consisted of a shirt, jacket, and trousers! They must not have guessed my secret after all! I didn’t know if I was relieved at this, or if I was all the more worried over for what reason I had then been removed from my friends. I felt as though a clawed hand was gripping at my stomach, the anxiety over what was to become of me increasing by the minute. My situation aboard the Abraham Lincoln had been worrisome enough, but perhaps the professor and I would have been able to come up with a story that would have gotten me to New York safely. The Commander had seemed an honourable man, from the way Aronnax had spoken of him. But then what? Now my thoughts were spiralling. If I had come to New York, it would still have been the 1860s, which was a much larger problem than any other I had ever had, present situation included. Would I have gone to Washington, to try and find whatever wormhole I’d fallen through? Was it even a wormhole? It may have no connection to the location at all, since the moment I was transported in time was when I’d touched the name plate of the Abraham Lincoln . I cursed myself for not trying to get to it while I was still aboard the frigate, but my mind had first been so clouded, then so wrapped up in the mysterious sea creature, that the thought never even occurred to me. And now it was too late. Who were these people who had ‘rescued’ us? What language were they speaking? I kept coming back to the reason why I had been separated from my friends, but could not guess at it. Unfortunately, this only lead to worse and worse scenarios taking shape in my head, until I found myself sat in the far corner, arms around my legs, sobbing uncontrollably. At this point, I think a couple hours must have passed since the steward had been in, and I had never even thought to touch the food I’d been served. I heard the door open, and looked up to see him come back in. He looked most surprised at the sight of me. Understandable, for I must have been in an absolute state. He shuffled back out the door, I heard it lock, and continued sobbing even harder. It did not take long before he was back again, but this time he wasn’t alone. The steward headed into the room first, looking quite uncomfortable as he quickly glanced at me. He went to grab the tray to take back out. And then, in stepped the tall man from before, the one who’d ordered me away from my group. His domineering presence filled the room, and I stopped sobbing, found myself quite unable to breathe at all. I did not dare look at him, my eyes darted about the room, before he said in a soft, deep voice:

“Are you quite alright, miss?” 

I found I could not answer him, I felt like a fox trapped in a snare, and would have gladly chewed my foot off if it had gotten me out of this situation. Had he called me miss? I was getting tunnel vision now, and was close to fainting I think, when I felt a warm hand grab mine. 

“Please, miss, you are in no danger aboard the Nautilus, I give you my word.” 

I had experienced anxiety attacks before, even quite regularly for a recent period in my life. What I had never experienced, was being brought out of one so suddenly. I could scarcely believe the effect his touch and words had had on me. All of a sudden, I could take a slow, deep breath, and I looked up. The man had bent his knee to reach down to take my hand, and was now sat like this in front of me, still holding it. His face, with its striking features, showed genuine concern for me. I looked into his dark eyes, and found myself wishing I could stay exactly here, like this, forever.  

He reached into his pocket, and fished out a handkerchief which he pressed into my hands with both of his in a sincere gesture, before letting go. He got up, but only to sit down at the desk. The handkerchief was made from the same soft material as my clothes, with a beautifully embroidered ‘N’ in one corner. I buried my face in it, and despite my despondent state, could not help but notice how good it smelled. 

“Miss, will you take a drink of water?” he said, and went to fill an enamel cup at the basin. He handed it to me, and I carefully accepted it. As I slowly sipped from it, he sat down again and started talking.

“If you are amenable, I should like to speak with you for a moment.”

I could only nod my head at this, perhaps because I realised he wasn’t really giving me an option, or because even if he had, I did not wish for him to leave. 

“What is your name, miss?” There was a certain sharpness in his tone now, leaving no room to persist in the lie of me being ‘Elliot’. 

“Eleonora, sir,” I answered truthfully, and same as with the professor, I would have no cause to regret this. The man in front of me was, however, more demanding than the gentle Pierre.

“I would have your full name, if you please, Eleonora,” he said insistently. I looked up at him, and realised that in this man, to whom I was so drawn, laid the biggest obstacle to any hope I had of concealing the truth of my situation. His piercing eyes seemed to read my mind, and I understood my best hope was to stray as little from the truth as possible, while still sounding believable. Every detail that could be true in the year of 1868 would stay the same. I would also do my best to not give any information not directly asked for. I straightened up a little before answering.

“My name is Eleonora Margareta Larsson.” I saw his eyes flash appreciatively at the dignity with which I had said this, and was rewarded instantly with a smile so beautiful I thought my heart would stop. 

“It is my pleasure to make your acquaintance, miss Larsson. Welcome aboard the Nautilus!”

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Much later, I would learn that the reason for his appreciation had not only been the way I had said my name, but more so because of the fact that I was clearly not British, which my frankly flawless pronunciation might otherwise suggest.

“You are Scandinavian then, miss?” he continued, and I tried to regain my composure.

“I am indeed. Swedish.” 

“So you lied when the professor asked if you spoke another language?” he asked in his, that I would come to know, common, frank way. I took a deep breath.

“I thought it best I speak as little as possible, sir. I did not know what kind of men you were, and I had rather my sex been kept a secret for that time being,” I answered in the same frank way, surprising myself with my bravery. His eyes glinted, he had not taken offence. 

“I understand, and knowing men, it was a wise choice, so I will not hold it against you,” he said, and there seemed to be an undertone of something hateful in his voice, but not directed at me. 

“Pardon me, sir, but you were not fooled?” I had to ask, since the one piece of evidence he had had more than the crew aboard the Abraham Lincoln were two small words uttered. He almost sneered at this.

“Miss Larsson, I am not an easy man to fool.”

His confidence was absolute, and I had no reason do doubt him. I was no longer worried about the threat that came with being a lone woman onboard a ship full of men, for if his influence was as great over his crewmates as I suspected, his promise that no harm would come to me was all I needed. He tilted his head and looked at me.

“Is that why you were crying before? You thought we would force ourselves upon you after our discovery?” The hatefulness was back in his voice, stronger, but I could tell it was all the same not towards me. 

“I… I’m not sure. At first, perhaps, when you took me from the others. But then… The steward came with a set of men’s clothes, and I thought I had not been discovered after all.” 

“Ah. The reason for that is simple, I’m afraid we only have men’s clothes to provide!”

“I see. And the reason for taking me away?” I asked boldly. He paused for a moment, then smiled softly. 

“The same reason you wanted to have us believe you were a man. I did not know what sort of men your companions might turn out to be! I would rather have you safe, in a cabin of your own.” His thoughtfulness surprised me, and I realised that it was true, he could not have known what my previous connections with the three men were, or if I knew them at all. The professor might have stumbled upon my name, to hide my gender for selfish, nefarious reasons, rather than to keep me safe. I hastened to assure him that this was not the case. Indeed, the past week had given the professor and his servant every opportunity to act upon any insidious desires, but they had both treated me with nothing but complete dignity. Ned Land, who’d rescued me twice, when finding out my true identity had shown only suspicion, and then acceptance. It couldn’t be the first time he’d met a woman dressed as a man at sea, and probably knew there might be good reason for it. 

“I am truly sorry if it scared you, miss, I meant only your safety.” 

“I understand, and I do appreciate the sentiment, but why leave me in here without any explanation?” At this, a shadow of something which might have almost been bashfulness came across his face, but was gone before I could be sure.

“You were meant to eat the food,” he replied, simply. At first, I thought he’d changed the subject, and was about to interject, when the realisation hit me. I must have turned pale, and my eyes widened. 

“Please, miss, know that it too was only for your safety. We have much to speak of still, but know that I am a man who has quit any contact with the outside world, and you four being here has posed quite a dilemma for me.” I wish I had admonished him, screamed at him. How dare he speak of my safety while at the same time admitting to trying to drug me?! Unfortunately, the words that stuck with me the most were ‘we have much to speak of still’. In the middle of my agitation, I could not help but feel elated that I would get to spend more time with him. I’m afraid this was foreboding, for indeed, the future would prove that there was nothing I could not forgive him for.

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I stayed silent, even though I was, I suppose, enraged. Or enraptured. A mixture of both. He continued:

“I wanted to have a moment to think of how to deal with this… precarious situation. I have saved you from certain death, but I’m afraid it is not in my power to give you back your lives. The secret of my existence cannot be revealed to the world.” 

I spoke up now, fervently, since I was abhorred at this stranger taking such liberties with me and my friends’s lives.

“And who are you, sir, to be so important as to take our lives in your hands! To rescue us, only to torment us? Drug us and play mind games? We are all free people, we have committed no crimes, therefore you cannot keep us here. No one has that power!”

He smiled then, grimly, his eyes remaining somber.

“Then I must be No One, for in this I have no choice.”

“Well then, Odysseus, please enlighten me! What is to become our fate?” I thought I saw a glimmer of amusement pass over his face at my comment, but could not imagine what would be amusing about the situation. 

“You will remain here, as passengers aboard the Nautilus .” He relayed the conditions of his offer, and because the alternative he gave was to be placed back on the platform for the sea to take us, I had no option but to accept.

“I will extend the same offer to your companions once they awaken. It will be quite some time before that event occurs, so I suggest you take some sustenance after all. I can assure you it would contain no secret ingredients this time.” The truth was that I already trusted this man with all my heart, whether I liked it or not, but thought perhaps he did not necessarily need to know of my weakness for him, so I sneered defiantly. He paid my impertinence no mind, but simply arose, and went to leave. 

“Very well then, I bid you adieu for now, miss Larsson.” He made a slight bow, turned his back, but before he could leave I cried out:

“Wait! You never answered my question. Who are you?” He froze, and smiling, spoke over his shoulder:

“Ah, but you said so yourself, miss. I am Odysseus, and so, you may call me Captain Nemo.”

Chapter Text

After the Captain left, I finally arose from my uncomfortable position. This was also the first time I would come to regret not taking his advice, for despite my upset state, I could feel the hunger gnawing at me now that I knew I was in no immediate danger. Although I would never admit to the man who was effectively my kidnapper that he’d been right, so I had to make do with the fresh water from the tap. Having at least satisfied my thirst, I did begin to realise that I had not slept for almost twenty-four hours at this point, and could feel the exhaustion in my limbs. I laid down on the bed, and pulled the covers up over my head, but still could not sleep for a long time. I was laying there, thinking of how bad my situation truly was on every plane, yet the panic from earlier did not set in. Somehow, the prospect of being stuck on a submarine in 1867 did not appear so dreadful, now that I had met its Captain. With that thought, the scenarios in my head turned more pleasant, and I drifted off to a heavy sleep. 

When I awoke, my limbs were stiff, as if from a long rest. I slowly came to, and realised where I was. 1867. The Pacific Ocean. Aboard the submarine Nautilus . My next thought was of its captain. I wondered when I would next see him. Despite how captivating he was, my thoughts were interrupted. I realised I was desperate for the bathroom. Oh no. The only door in my cabin was the locked entrance. Aboard the Abraham Lincoln , I’d embarrassingly had to use a bed pan, which the poor Conseil had had to empty, which now of course meant I would never be able to look him in the eye. He had borne the task with the same quiet indifference he did everything else. The memory jogged another one, from when I was younger. My mother’s side of the family came from a small island on the Swedish west coast, and even though it had been a long time since the family lived there, we still owned the old house. We spent every summer there, despite it being very primitive. We only had the one tap, which supplied only cold water, and no toilet, just an outhouse. At night, if one needed to use the bathroom, there was an ancient chamber pot at ones disposal. I know what you’re thinking, and no, it was not dignified. However, perhaps… I looked under the bed, but it was empty. Only one other possibility. I opened the cabinet door under the washstand, but it contained only a couple of towels, some toiletries, and a comb. I sighed, and for a brief moment considered using the basin… but no. I bit the bullet, and banged on the door. At first, I wasn’t sure if the sound would carry far enough through the thick metal, or even at all, but it didn’t take long before the steward from before cautiously opened the door. He looked at me questioningly. I tried not to sound ashamed, telling him:

“I need to use the…” What would the correct 1800s term be? “...your facilities! Please.” The steward only stared, and then closed the door. Excuse me? I made an offended noise. ‘Fine! I’ll show them!’ I’d almost completely made up my mind to pee in their stupid basin out of spite, when the door opened again.

“Good morning, miss Larsson. I trust you slept well?” Captain Nemo’s presence caught me off guard, and I was dumbfounded for a moment. 

“I… Yes, thank you. I was just asking…” 

“Pardon me, the steward does not speak a word of English, I’m afraid.”

“Ah…” I tried to find my footing, this was the last person I wanted to ask such an embarrassing question of, but I couldn’t wait for much longer. Straightening up, I said with as much dignity as I could muster: 

“I would like to use your facilities, please!” The Captain looked at me amused, and with a step back, gestured for me to go out the door. I tried my very best to hold my head up high, and walk with an air of utmost grace, but he was stood in such a way that I had to pass by very closely. I could feel the heat coming off of his body, and he smelled of a fresh sea breeze, tinged with a deeper, masculine scent. I almost stumbled, and could hear the amusement in his voice.

“Just down the passageway, third door on the right, miss. Let me know if you need any assistance!” he said sardonically, before turning, and walking down the other way. I had frozen with my mouth open. What had he said? I had not seen his facial expression, and could not tell whether the comment was made in a belittling or flirtatious way. I had no more time to think before I had to rush down the corridor to the appointed door. I found behind it the most comfortable bathroom! I rushed to the toilet, and, once I could think clearly again, resumed my musings. 'So, Odysseus has a sense of humour then, does he?' Well, unfortunately for him, I was equipped with 21st century sarcasm. He wouldn’t know what hit him!

Chapter Text

While I was in the astonishingly well furnished bathroom, I decided there was no rush to get back to… the cabin? I realised the Captain had left me alone in the corridor, and that I was perhaps free to go wherever I liked from this moment on. Did that mean he’d talked to the others now, giving them the same ultimatum as me, and there was no risk of me perhaps trying to free them anymore? Maybe that had never even been a worry of his, and I found that I could not remember Nemo actually locking my door at all after leaving last night, he had just closed it behind him. ‘Oh my god… I am so stupid!’ I was mortified, there had been no need for me to announce my urgent business to him, I could have simply gone to find the bathroom myself. ‘Let me know if you need any assistance’... It hadn’t been an impertinent comment, he simply thought I was an idiot! There had been no cheeky double meaning, and I felt like banging my head against the metal wall. I chose the second best thing; a long, hot bath. 

Having finally rinsed my hair and body of the seawater in which they’d been drenched for over a week, I felt a little better. I had found some kind of lathering soap in the bathroom, which smelled nice and fresh, and a comb. I towel-dried my hair and combed through it. I may not have been gifted with every genetic blessing, but my hair does look quite nice even with no styling but a brush-through. I dressed again in the soft clothes I’d been given, and they flattered a woman’s body well enough even if that hadn’t been by design. The trousers were high-waisted, and fitted perhaps a bit more snug around my backside than they would on a man. The shirt was quite loose-fitting, which I was thankful for as I hadn’t worn a bra under my casual summer outfit in the 21st century. I tucked it into the trousers, and put the casual sailor’s jacket on over. I’d been given a pair of the same seal-skin boots everyone on board seemed to be wearing, which were luckily a good enough fit. Looking in the mirror, I don’t think my appearance would have been too strange in my time, but I knew enough to surmise that it was not how a woman in the 19th century usually presented herself. ‘Oh well’, I thought, it would have to do. My next quest would be to search for some food, preferably drug-free.

I went out into the corridor, and thought for a moment before deciding on going in the direction Captain Nemo had disappeared to earlier. I walked along the gangway, passed the cabin I had been locked in, and continued another ten or so meters to the end. There was no other choice than to open the door in front of me. Nothing could have prepared me for what awaited on the other side. Not another metal corridor, an engine room, or a broom closet, but a most lavishly furnished dining room! Two men were in the midst of setting the table, but stopped abruptly when they saw me. They exchanged a few words with one another in the strange language from the first day, and then both left through a door in the opposite corner. I hadn’t even had time to think of what to say to them. My first thought was to follow them, but I was clearly not wanted, so I instead walked to the other end of the room, and opened a set of double doors. If I had thought I could not be more astonished than when finding the dining room, I was wrong. Behind the doors was the most beautiful library I had ever seen. At first, I was so amazed I did not move a muscle, my jaw hanging open. After managing to collect myself, I slowly strode in, and walked along the shelves. Books on every imaginable topic, in a myriad of languages, filled them. I quickly spotted two large volumes with a name on the front that I recognised. ‘Les Mystères des grands fonds sous-marins, de prof. Pierre Aronnax’. I was so happy to finally see the work my friend had spoken of so often during my recent illness, that I immediately started folding through the pages. Even though I could understand very little of it, it was easy to see that it was a fine work, and I imagined that Captain Nemo must be elated to have its author onboard. I admired Aronnax’s drawings, so much more detailed than the ones he’d shown me from his sketchbook, and some coloured with delicate watercolours. I was so engrossed by the pages that I didn’t notice anyone entering the dining room behind me, but was startled by a cry.

“Mademoiselle Eleonora!” I whipped around, and saw the professor in the dining room. 

“Professor!” I exclaimed, and was so happy to see him after the tumultuous past days that I could almost forget the man standing next to him. We hurried to greet each other, and I threw my arms around him in a tight embrace. Aronnax happily returned it, before remembering himself, and let me go. He looked me over, and must have concluded that no harm had been done to me, so smiled warmly. 

“I am so pleased to see you! You look well.” Before I could answer him, Captain Nemo spoke up:

“Miss Larsson, I was told you had already found your way to the dining room, which spared me the trouble of finding you to invite you here for breakfast.” Did he mean to reprimand me? Had I not been free to roam the submarine after all? I was constantly looking for hidden meaning in the Captains’ words, trying to figure him out, to no avail. I could think no further before he gestured for Aronnax to take a seat, and held out a chair for me opposite. I blushed slightly, not being used to that kind of formality. The table had been laid with a formidable spread of dishes, and Nemo, seated at the head of the table, welcomed us to help ourselves. I was still suspicious of the food, so despite my hunger, I hesitated. The Captain read my mind, and held out a dish with some kind of meat, beautifully plated.

“Some loin of sea turtle, miss?”

“Please, after you, Captain!” I said, sweetly, but with a cold smile. I was so hoping to redeem myself from this morning’s mortifying blunder, and had to somehow prove I was not a complete fool. He seemed to find this comment amusing, and served himself two slices of the meat with a half-smile. I helped myself only to the dishes the Captain ate from during breakfast. Most of it was good, but some things had a peculiar taste, and Captain Nemo explained all their origins with great apprecation for his chef. When he told us the cream came from a cetacean, I almost spat out my water, but managed to stop myself from questioning it. I had made my mind up to be silent unless I had something very intelligent or extremely witty to add. Most of the meal was spent with Nemo telling us of how the Nautlius and its crew stayed completely independent from land, and I believe I can safely say both me and the professor were absolutely enthralled by this man and his ingenuity. As he talked about his love for the sea, he did so with a religious conviction, and I felt I could suddenly understand how a great leader might inspire his followers to lay down their lives for a common cause. I was reminded of my first impression of him, of how he had the influence of the great kings of old, and he truly was the sort of man people would tell stories of, hundreds of years after his death.

Chapter Text

“Now, professor, if you’d like to inspect the Nautilus , I’m yours to command.” After debating for a moment, Captain Nemo invited me as well. 

“Miss Larsson, if you would care to join us, you are most welcome to.” I don’t really know why he didn’t expect me to be interested in this engineering marvel, but I suspect it might have something to do with the misogyny of the times. Unfortunately, it’s no secret that I have a temper, and don’t usually take kindly to being belittled, so I answered him fervently.

“Thank you, Captain, I would love to!” 

As we went into the library, Aronnax had a chance to admire it as well, and was walking along the shelves as I had, meticulously examining the volumes. The Captain offered me a seat, before stretching out on a couch himself.

“So, Captain, I take it you are an admirer of professor Aronnax's work?” I said, gesturing to the open volume I’d left on a reading stand. 

“Indeed. It is the most comprehensible work on the ocean depths written to date, I believe, and I look forward to aiding the professor in his continued research,” he answered generously.

“I can imagine,” I smiled. “I’ve unfortunately not had a chance to read it myself before, but it will be my great pleasure. I’ve always been fascinated by the sea and its mysteries, how such an alien world can still be ours, yet we know so little of it. We came from the sea, but we are not able to go back. Well, until now, of course,” I gestured vaguely to the space we were in. I was thinking of growing up, my summers by the sea, and of watching old films by Jacques Cousteau. Damn, I’d really wanted to see the Trieste . Captain Nemo looked at me with an indecipherable look, appearing to almost try and see inside my head. His piercing gaze made me uneasy, and I felt the need to break the silence.

“Captain, did you know that the professor has illustrated his own work? Not just a renowned marine biologist, he is also the most remarkable artist!” Aronnax seemed to stir from his inspection at this praise, and hastened to say:

“Oh, indeed not, I’m sure my publisher knew no one else would be interested in such a tedious task, that is all!” He was blushing, looking yet again no more than a boy, and I smiled reproachingly. 

“Professor, you are far too modest! Here sit two of your greatest admirers, and you are insulting our taste by not admitting to your own genius!” I said, good-humouredly. I’d painted him into a corner, and he looked incredibly uncomfortable, yet smiled proudly.  

“I thank you for this celebration, mademoiselle. You are generosity itself.”

“Rest assured, I won’t make a habit of it!” I answered, grinning at my friend. He laughed, then turned to the Captain.

“Sir, thank you for placing the library at our disposal. There are scientific treasures here, and I’ll take advantage of them.” Captain Nemo, who’d seemed deep in thought, was roused from the direct address. He nodded in acknowledgement, and said:

“This room isn’t only a library, it is also a smoking room.” We were both surprised at this, and Aronnax proclaimed the Captain must keep up relations with Havana, but he informed us this was not the case. I wasn’t normally a smoker, apart from one here and there at parties, and the occasional vape, but my indignation at not being offered a cigar made me ask whether I might have one as well. I simply couldn’t stand being treated differently, just because I was a woman, not in any century! The Captain looked surprised, but held out the box for me. I carefully took after the professor when lighting it, and inhaled. I was happy to find there was no harsh tobacco to burn my lungs, but a smooth, pleasant smoke. I was filled with the instant relaxation that comes from inhaling nicotine, and me and the professor both proclaimed they were superior to any smoke we’d had before. The Captain seemed pleased at this, if slightly perplexed at my joining them. I imagine he quite liked being able to show off his marvelous existence to such an admiring crowd, for he opened the next set of doors with barely contained enthusiasm. 

It is difficult to put down into words the impression the next room made on me. If you’ve ever been to the east wing of the British Museum, you will have some understanding of what we now stepped into. Only that this room contained natural treasures ten times the rarity of those there, along with what could have been the most prized collections from the Louvre, and the Vatican. I was moving among the treasures, more floating than walking, in a state of wonder such as I’ve almost never been before. I was vaguely aware of the professor and Captain speaking to each other, but in my dream-like state I couldn’t tell of what. Despite the copious amounts of time I would come to spend in there, the wonderment would never really cease. I was walking along display cabinets of the most exquisite seashells, and thought of my own attempts at displaying the shells I would find walking along the beach back home in Sweden. Although they paled in comparison, I wasn’t embarrassed, but rather felt a strange connection to Captain Nemo. Just as I was thinking this, I heard him tell the professor that he had collected them all himself. I agreed that it does add to the charm when you’ve found them yourself, and the thrill of first seeing a perfect specimen in the water is unrivalled. I only realised I’d spoken aloud when I saw the two men paused, looking at me before continuing their conversation. I absent-mindedly noted they’d switched to speaking French, and could only catch a phrase here and there. I didn’t mind, as I noticed Captain Nemo showing the professor the instruments hanging on the wall, and worried I wouldn’t be able to follow the discussion no matter the language. Better I kept my promise and stayed silent until I was sure I could dazzle the Captain with my keen intellect. Surely some of my knowledge and skills from the future might accomplish this? I just had to wait until the right moment. 

I was admiring a beautiful portrait by Holbein, when I was interrupted by Captain Nemo speaking to me in English.

“Miss Larsson, I am taking the professor to inspect the engine room, but I trust you will be comfortable in…” I knew where this was headed, and thought perhaps this might be my chance, so I boldly interjected.

“Perfect! I would be delighted to see this marvel,” I said, beaming up at the Captain. By now, I suspected he thought me the most annoying being in creation, but I didn’t care, as long as I redeemed myself intellectually. To his credit, he didn’t look annoyed, but stayed perfectly polite.

“Very well, then it will be my pleasure to show it to you both.” He lead us on a tour of the submarine, down a different gangway to the one I’d come from. Aronnax seemed to marvel at every little thing which, to me, were normal, everyday things. I had to remind myself that cooking with electricity was not a regular occurrence in 1867. When we got to the engine room, me and the professor both reacted to the foul smell in there. The Captain told us this was an effect of the sodium used in the Bunsen cells, and I looked at him questioningly. He patiently explained to me that Bunsen cells were batteries, which were the things that made his boat go vroom vroom, in only slightly less insulting wording. I was not having it. I retorted sharply.

“I see. And how many volts do these Bunsen cells generate? I imagine a great deal of energy is requiered to power your Nautilus. She reaches an impressive speed, the professor tells me, so we are surely talking several thousand volts needed.”

Both Captain Nemo and the professor stared at me.

“You possess an understanding of batteries, miss?” the Captain asked, with an incredulous look on his face, disbelief in his voice.

“Well I wouldn’t claim to be able to construct one, but I do have a fundamental understanding of how they work, yes,” I replied, casually. “Anyway, you said these use sodium? How come you didn’t opt for batteries recharged by some renewable energy, like hydropower? Would it not be more efficient than having to restock the sodium at regular intervals?” 

The two men both had a look of absolute astonishment written on their faces, and while the professor looked as though he was ready to either perform an exorcism or bow down at my feet, the Captain looked almost angry. I worried I had offended him rather than impressed him by acting as if his scientific marvel was common knowledge, which of course, in my time, it was. I had taken a stab at the voltage needed, because I had recently exchanged the starting battery in my small car, which used only 12 volts. 

Captain Nemo did not answer at once, but seemed to reevaluate his whole existence in that moment. He cleared his throat before replying. 

“I do not use such an efficient method to charge the Nautilus’s batteries, miss, I am sorry to say. Had I thought such a thing possible, I would naturally have opted for it.” As he said this, I realised the angry look had not been directed at me, but rather at himself for not thinking of this, to our modern minds, obvious solution. Now I worried instead that I had made him feel insufficient, in some way unhappy with his incredible feat. I hastened to try and rectify this.

“Captain, please forgive me, I do not know if such a thing if possible, but was simply letting my mind wander. No matter how you go about fueling your marvelous ship, it is clearly working very well!” I said with an encouraging smile.

“Yes, thank you, and although I am not using ‘renewable energy’ to do so, I can assure you that our methods are efficient enough.” He said this with a certain sharpness to his tone, and I understood I may have sounded condescending. 

“Renewable energy…” The professor said in quiet wonderment to himself.

I realised that going forward, I would have to tread carefully as to not cross the line from ‘well-educated 19th century woman’ to ‘insane woman claiming knowledge of the future’.

Chapter Text

As we made our way back to the lounge, Aronnax was peppering Captain Nemo with more questions, and I admit I was happy I understood most of the answers. I felt I’d made my point with the batteries, and needn’t prove my intelligence as desperately anymore. I was hoping I wouldn’t be belittled as much in the future, but would soon realise the pendulum had swung too far in the other direction. 

Captain Nemo had us all seated in the lounge, where tea had been served. An avid tea-drinker, I was more than pleased at this. I’d barely had time to take a sip, before the Captain looked at me intently and said:

“Now, miss Larsson, I would like to continue our conversation from yesterday.”

I should have known there would be more questions. Foolishly, I’d thought misogyny would protect me from having to give up any more information past my name, since I couldn’t possibly be of interest, being just a woman. Perhaps that would have been the case, if I hadn’t felt the need to parade my 21st century education in front of the Captain. My knowledge of batteries, along with the fact that I had after all been found impersonating a man, must make me more interesting than I preferred to be in this situation. 

“I know only your full name, and your nationality. Now I would also like to know what you were doing shipwrecked two-hundred miles from the nearest coast, dressed as a man?” I had been dreading this confrontation beyond reason, and felt beads of cold sweat form on my forehead. I looked around desperately, at the Captain’s calm, cold appearance, and the dear professor’s concerned and compassionate face, but found no perch. I dropped my gaze down to my knee, where my hands were nervously clasped. I tried to remember the resolution I’d made, to not stray further than necessary from the truth, and began. 

“I… had been travelling…” This was true. “With my fiancé…” This was not true. The reason I’d been travelling was to process the breakup from a man who’d torn me down, in almost every way imaginable. I’d wanted to find my way back to myself, to who I’d been before him. After such a long relationship, it was not a quick journey. Of course, I couldn’t tell them that, but took inspiration from the truth as I continued.

“My fiancé was not a kind man, not anymore. He was at first, before we were engaged, but I had been deceived. He would not let me go, and I felt that I would rather drown quickly in the Pacific, than slowly in years of marriage.” This part was also, incidentally, true. Even if it in reality had never come to such a drastic choice, it was an apt allegory for how the relationship had ended. 

“I stole a shirt and trousers, so as to not be noticed when I walked up on deck that night. And then I jumped.” I still felt I could not look up, and now, my eyes were burning from holding back tears. A hand was put on top of mine, and I met the professor’s gentle, grey eyes. I managed a small smile, but was interrupted by the Captain’s deep voice. It was too monotonous sounding, as if he was trying to hide his true emotions.

“You had no family to turn to? Who could help your situation?”

“No, sir, my family all live in Sweden, and I was engaged to an Englishman who would not let me travel home. He even took me with him on his travels, despite us not yet being married, to thwart any attempt to do so in his absence.” Yes, I had to fill in some gaps, but I still held onto my device of not changing any details that could stay the same in both centuries. I quickly met the Captain Nemo’s gaze, and he appeared calm, but I noticed he had a fierce grip on the arm of his fauteuil, turning his knuckles white. 

“And your father? You could not write to him for help?” 

“My father is dead since many years, sir.” Well, actually not dead, just dead to me. Or, I suppose, technically not even born yet. Even better. The professor now exclaimed:

“Mademoiselle, je suis très désolé! You have suffered terribly indeed.” He clasped my hands in both of his now, and I gave them a gentle squeeze. I was thankful for his presence. The Captain remained silent, his chin resting in his hand, deep in thought. Finally he spoke.

“Your fiancé, this Englishman, how did he expect you to agree to the marriage after this treatment?” His tone was calm, but not far beneath the surface a storm seemed to be raging. I worried this might be directed at me if my story didn’t hold up, and felt the need to pile on to the misery, so as to elicit a sympathetic response from this man. Remembering his reaction to finding me crying in the locked cabin, I did not shy away from uttering the following sentence:

“I suppose he thought, once I fell pregnant, I would not have much choice.” A pressing silence fell. No one spoke for several minutes. I might have felt worse about lying, if I didn’t think this was an accurate translation of how my ex would have behaved in the 19th century. Even in the 21st century he’d treated me worse than a dog towards the end, a piece of property which inconveniently happened to have opinions. He truly had tried to break me, and I felt no remorse in painting him in this light. An escaped tear fell down my cheek. Captain Nemo arose suddenly, and started pacing the floor. Aronnax put a hand on my back, gently rubbing it. I heard the Captain say something under his breath, but could not catch the whole meaning, only something along the lines of ‘all the same’, and ‘devoid of human compassion’. I wasn’t sure what to make of it. Finally he spoke up, seeming to have regained his composure.

“Thank you for sharing your story, I understand it is a subject you are happy to avoid. If you do not mind, there is one more question I should like to ask you.” I froze. The Captain had warned he was not an easy man to fool, and despite me being a somewhat talented actress, he’d seen through me. But no.

“Where did you acquire your scientific knowledge?” ‘Oh, high school in the 21st century, why?’ Another slight work-around the truth was needed.

“My father, sir. He was a professor of ancient history at Uppsala University, but also had a keen interest in the latest technology, and I was an inquisitive child.” My father explaining the inner workings of things and teaching me about natural science was the closest we ever came to bonding, and the memories were bitter-sweet. 

“Votre père, un professeur!” exclaimed Aronnax. He beamed at me, and said, in a joking voice: “I now understand where you get your excellent understanding from, mademoiselle!” The tension broke, and I laughed with my friend. The Captain sat down in his armchair again, and although he still bore a serious expression on his face, seemed to relax. I was desperate to finally change the subject, and asked him politely:

“Captain, this tea is excellent. May I ask how you procure it?” He told us it was made from a naturally sweet algae from the North Sea.

“Ah, the sugar kelp? I know it well!” I smiled, and turned to the professor. “When I was little, I thought they looked like giant squid tentacles as they were swaying in the waves under the dock! I was scared of them!” I laughed, and Aronnax with me, but Captain Nemo’s eyes narrowed slightly at me. Oh no, had I accidentally revealed some contradictory detail about myself through the harmless tidbit? I was worried he would continue his interrogation, but he said nothing. 

Chapter Text

“Capitaine, I wonder if you might be so kind as to continue our education on the Nautilus’ construction?” asked the professor amiably. The Captain, having apparently satisfied his curiosity when it came to my background, at least for the moment, happily obliged. He got out the schematics for us, and he and the professor dove into a discussion on the composition, engineering and mathematics involved in her construction. I admit some things went over my head, as maths had never been my favourite subject, but followed along for the most part. I noticed the professor was not afraid to ask any question, no matter how simple the answer might seem, and admired him for it. His thirst for knowledge came before any pride he might have, which only made me like him more. Nemo seemed to feel the same way, for he kindly and extensively answered every question. Aronnax praised the Captain profusely, who, unlike the professor himself, accepted it with perfect ease. He then turned to me and said;

“Mademoiselle, is the Nautilus not the most ingenious invention you have ever heard of!” I’d kept silent up until this point, not trusting myself not to reveal anything else, but smiled at the both of them now. I’d always appreciated intelligent men, and these two nerds jabbering away was frankly very sweet. I’m sure they’d have been most offended if I’d said so, instead I settled for a disarming joke and said with a warm smile:

“It is indeed a marvel in every way, and I’m sure if you filled the ballast tanks with helium instead of water, she would conquer the skies as well.” The professor looked shocked, I’m sure he thought the Captain would be offended, but Nemo laughed. He actually laughed. Only a short huff, but the way his earnest smile lit up his face took my breath away as surely as it had yesterday. I thought for a delirious second that I might be happy devoting the rest of my life to making him smile. 

“You approve of her then, miss?” I dared to meet his eyes, and gave a shy smile.

“Most certainly. She would be a worthy opponent of Scylla and Charybdis.” The warm, appreciative look in Nemo’s eyes at me making what must be called an inside joke had me almost swooning, but I held his gaze. I wanted to forever remember that look, along with the slightly coy smile, for he was without a doubt the most beautiful man I’d ever seen. We must have stood there for a moment too long, as the professor had to clear his throat, and interject.

“Hm, bien-sûr, the most marvelous machine…” he said, looking uncomfortable. The Captain’s good mood sustained, for he said cunningly;

“And the best is yet to come!” Neither I nor the professor understood what he meant, although he seemed to have another, more pressing question first. When he asked the Captain whether his collisions with ships had been accidental, I grew cold. How could I have forgotten about that? There was a reason they’d been hunting the Nautilus , and she was of course also the reason we had been thrown overboard! However, Captain Nemo assured us the previous collisions had been accidental, and that he had only incapacitated the Abraham Lincoln reluctantly. Me and Aronnax both relaxed, and he once again praised the wondrous submarine. The Captain had not lost his mirth, and excitedly went on to describe his great love for the unique ship, even saying he loved her like his own flesh and blood. When he said the great trust he placed in her came from the fact that he was her captain, builder and engineer all at once, my jaw dropped. Trying to meet the professor’s gaze, I found that I could not, for he was so fully transfixed on the Captain that I think a bomb could have gone off next to him without him noticing. 

“You’re an engineer, then, Captain Nemo?” I thought Aronnax’s question would be met with complete dismissal, but he was instead rewarded.

“Yes, professor. I studied in London, Paris, and New York back in the days when I was a resident of the Earth’s continents.” My mind was in uproar. He had so willingly given this information about himself, despite never even telling us his name! Did that mean there was perhaps a chance to get to know this man after all, this Odysseus with no name? The professor had asked him a direct yes-or-no question, so maybe this was the key to getting him to reveal his secrets, guessing at them? I thought back, trying to remember everything he had said so far, every facial expression, every detail, and vowed to memorise it all in the future as well. My mind was burning with the desire to know this man, so much so that I seemed to completely lay aside any plans or wishes to get back to my own time. While I had been wrapped up in thoughts, the conversation had kept on, although I had not heard anything of particular interest regarding the Captain. It was only at this question, addressed by the professor, that my ears perked up.

“You’re rich, then?”

“Infinitely rich, sir, and without any trouble, I could pay off the ten-billion-franc French national debt!” Had it been possible to get whiplash from mere words, I felt that I would have spent the rest of my life in a neck brace after the last few days’ conversations. 

Captain Nemo invited us both up on the platform, to determine the exact starting point of our grand voyage, over which he appeared to be quite excited. I thought perhaps he anticipated a different experience than his previous circumnavigations in this new company. At this time I didn’t know that what bound him and his crew together was fierce loyalty and honest camaraderie, as I’d barely seen any interactions between them. For all I knew, he might have hired them all with his incomprehensible wealth, and felt lonely onboard. This was of course not the case, but all the same, I like to think he already envisioned the friendship which would form between him, myself and Aronnax. As we were stood up there, basking in the sunlight, I realised I’d not seen daylight for over twenty-four hours, but not suffered from it for even a second. Looking over to the Captain, I thought again of my first impression of him, that he was like the sun. In his presence, I felt warm and safe. I noticed Aronnax admiring him as well, and saw in his facial expression what must have been a mirror of my own, betraying the same sentiments. If one had any such inclinations, I didn’t see how it was possible to feel any other way in regards to this regal man. For me, it had been inevitable from the first moment.

Chapter Text

Back in the salon, the Captain was determining our exact position using his instruments, and I noted Aronnax trying to extract another piece of information about our Odysseus by asking which meridian he’d set his chronometer to. This time, he was disappointed, as the Captain evaded giving any clue to his nationality, since he had several chronometers set to both Paris, Greenwich and D.C. After announcing our exact location, he gave us unrestricted access to the lounge, and politely took his leave. I was both disappointed, but also relieved to finally have a moment alone with the professor to talk things over. We immediately dove into theories on who this man might be, shared exact recounts of our separate experiences before the breakfast, and embarrassingly, completely forgot to talk about the actual direness of the life sentence the subject of our conversation had given us. We both vowed to give our utmost effort in finding out who Captain Nemo might have been, before he’d renounced all ties with humanity. What reason, what soul-shattering event, could cause someone to feel the need to do so? We agreed that this man, who’d clearly been gifted with intelligence, good looks and absolute authority, must have been through something dreadful to leave behind his whole existence. I thought to myself, ‘or maybe, there was nothing left to leave behind’. With this I could sympathise. 

An hour into our musings, our two other friends appeared. After their initial astonishment at the magnificent room, they inquired after my well-being. I assured them I had not been mistreated in the slightest. After this, Conseil went straight to the display cabinets, followed by the professor, and they meticulously started examining the exhibit. I took the chance to speak to Ned Land.

“Mr. Land, I must thank you. Three times, you have tried to save me, of which the first two were successful, and the third proving unnecessary. I am most grateful to you, and hope that you will let me know if there is ever anything I can do to repay you.” He looked at me, sceptically, and said in a meaning tone;

“Ma’am, I’m sure a fine lady such as yourself would do no such thing.” Oh. I’d accidentally propositioned him, hadn’t I? I clasped my hands over my mouth, and began frantically;

“Oh no! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it like that! Not that you’re not… I meant… shit..!” I hid my face in my hands, but Ned only laughed. He hadn’t taken offence?

“Wow, that’s quite some language there, miss Eleonora! Maybe you’re not such a fine lady after all!” I looked up at him, and couldn’t help but laugh as well. Alright, maybe I could see how this king of harpooners might find a girl in every port. He was tall, and handsome, if not my type, and could clearly be charming when he wanted to. I relaxed a bit, and said bashfully;

“I really am sorry, it came across wrong, but my sentiment was true!”

“Alright, great! Then you can start by telling me everything you found out about this Nemo, and his damned Nautilus !” He gestured for us to sit down on one of the sofas, and I told him what little we’d learnt so far, which unfortunately was not enough to please the Canadian. He seemed slightly irritated at the enthusiastic way I found myself speaking of the submarine and her Captain. 

“What, our jailor, a genius? Well, I just hope he’s smart enough to know you can’t keep Ned Land imprisoned without consequences!” I smiled at his confidence, but all the same felt bad. He was imprisoned, wasn’t he? I might technically be in the same circumstance, but somehow did not feel sorry for myself one bit because of it. I tried to help him see things my way, that this might be the greatest adventure any of us could have ever hoped for, to consider all the wondrous things we might see.

“See! There’s nothing to see, nothing we’ll ever see from this sheet-iron prison! We’re simply running around blindfolded-” The lights went out. ‘Power outage’ was of course my first thought, but then we heard panels shifting outside the hull. 

Sometimes in the late summer, after everyone went back to work, the sea would lie completely still for hours, overnight even. The winds died down in August, and all the silt normally stirred up from boats and the waves would sink to the bottom, and you would awake to a crystal clear view of the depths outside our island. For as long as I can remember, these mornings were the most magical things I’d ever experienced, it felt like getting a glimpse into another world. Had it not been for the fish swimming around, you wouldn’t even have known the water was there. I’d sit for hours, looking at the otherworldly flora and fauna beneath the waves, never tiring. It was like gazing into the most immense aquarium, without feeling any guilt, for the animals I saw were all wild and free. 

Imagine then how I felt, as these panels were withdrawn to reveal the sea around us. It was lit up by the Nautilus’ strong beacon, as well as by the sunlight penetrating the water for another 250 meters below us. The visibility was extraordinary, we must have seen the sea for miles around us, and I breathlessly moved to sit at the window. For several moments we were all speechless, then in the back of my mind I noted some kind of discussion between Conseil and Ned Land. The professor came to sit by me, smiling in wonderment.

“D’accord, I see now what the Capitaine meant.” Of course, ‘the best is yet to come’. He’d been right. For two hours, the four of us watched the schools of fish passing by outside, the other three all working together to classify each one with their combined knowledge. They spoke in French, but I listened intently. I had never before been to the Pacific and could not name many of the species we sighted. A few I might have seen at aquariums, but most were unknown to me. The professor seemed in ecstasy, and I smiled and took his hand. I was happy to share this experience with someone who understood how it made me feel, and he must have felt the same way, gently squeezing my hand. I thought of the Captain’s speech at breakfast, and judged that he too must share our reverence. Ned and Conseil appreciated it too, for sure, but in the way one might enjoy a good show or book, not with religious euphoria.

Chapter Text

The next days were spent in the company of my three fellow ‘convicts’, as I jokingly called us once, much to the delight of Ned Land. I found it easy to talk to him, feeling that I could relax a bit, and not worry as much about how or of what I spoke. With Ned, I could joke around and use a much more crude language than I’d dare with the professor or the Captain, closer to how I would normally speak. The subjects of our conversations were also less philosophical or scientific, and more down to Earth, giving my brain a welcome break. Unfortunately, my lingering embaressment as well as the language barrier hindered any conversation between Conseil and I. I'm not sure which was more lacking, my French or his English. When we were talking all four of us together, it was mainly in English, but Conseil did not seem to take offence. But then again, he never seemed to take offence at anything. Some of the time, me and the professor were alone, and during these times we discussed, almost without a fault, Nemo only. We were both completely lost in the mystery of this man, and every half hour or so, one of us would question where he might be at that very moment. His absence during these days was disappointing to us both, but gave us time to try and find clues to reveal his true identity. We did establish that his underwater journey could not have been ongoing for even these past three years, as the newspapers found in the library were dated to 1865 at the latest. Sometimes I would have to fight off the panic that came with the realisation of what year this was, but Aronnax had a very grounding effect on me, and I soon found that the more focused I was on the present, the easier it was to forget my bizarre circumstances. Regarding Nemo, I think I might have mentally started one of those walls from old detective shows, with the red strings connecting the different clues. The thought made me laugh to myself. 

On the third day, I awoke from a knock at my door. I’d been sleeping in the cabin from the first night, which had now generously been assigned to me. I’d found the wardrobe outfitted, and some more toiletries added to the mirror cabinet, as well as ink and paper at the desk. The knock came again. Despite the cabin lacking natural light, I could tell it was early morning. Ugh, not my favourite time of day, I'd always been more of a night owl. Without opening my eyes, I groggily said to come in. 

“Mademoiselle Eleonora?” It was the professor, and he looked a bit shocked to find me in bed.

“Oh calm down, it’s nothing you haven’t seen before,” I said, annoyed. He blushed at this, and I had to laugh at his expression. “I’m sorry, professor. It’s very early, is it not?” 

“Eh, oui, six o’clock. I am sorry to wake you.”

“No, no, it’s alright. What was it?” 

“We have surfaced, mademoiselle. I thought perhaps you’d like to take some air.”

This made me wake up.

“Oh really? Yeah, definitely!” I sat up, and Aronnax’s eyes widened, and he turned around. 

“I am waiting right outside, mademoiselle!” I realised I was just wearing my shirt, but shrugged. Like I’d said, it was nothing the professor hadn’t seen before. Besides, I had a suspicion that what he had seen, hadn’t been of any interest regardless. I splashed some water on my face and got dressed. 

We sat on the platform and witnessed a beautiful sunrise together, and I told the professor I forgave him for waking me up. He laughed, and at that moment we heard someone else coming up on the platform. My heart skipped a beat, expecting the Captain, but was disappointed to see the other man from our first meeting.

“Good morning,” I ventured, but was ignored. Using a spyglass, the man examined the horizon with the utmost care, before uttering a phrase in the strange language.

“Nautron respoc lorni virch.” Okay? He went below again without so much as a word to us. 

Five more days passed by in a similar manner, and every morning the professor came to wake me, although he didn’t dare to come into my cabin anymore, in case I should be ‘indecent’ again, as he put it. If only he knew what I used to wear going out! The thought made me smile. On November 17th, as every morning, me and Aronnax were sat up on the platform, and inevitably we started talking about the Captain. He’d been absent for over a week now. We were both so eager to see him again, to talk to him, that we resolved to ask one of the crew where he might be. Aronnax told me not to have too high hopes, as our experience so far was that they refused to even acknowledge our existence. At that moment, the man who the professor thought might be the chief officer, came up through the hatch. Every morning, I greeted him, and every morning, he ignored me. I resolved that I would get a reaction from him somehow, and before he could utter his customary phrase, I interjected:

“Pardon me, sir, but do you know where we might find the Captain?” The man did not even dignify me with a look, but just continued scanning the horizon. I’d had enough, and in a stroke of either madness or genius I asked Aronnax;

“Professor, did you hear about that poor man, who had to have the whole left side of his body amputated?” The professor stared at me as if I’d completely lost my mind, and I hastened to say;

“Oh, don’t worry, he’s all right now!” I heard the officer make a sound like a laugh, which he tried to conceal as a fit of coughing, but I gave him a discrediting look. He seemed to realise that the battle was lost, I’d had my confirmation, and he conceded with a sigh. 

“The Captain should be in the library. I believe he would see you today,” he said, reluctantly. Perhaps I should have been ashamed of my cheap trick, but I was elated from having extracted this single piece of information about the crew. The chief officer spoke English! Albeit with an accent I couldn't place. I gave him a brilliant smile.

“Thank you kindly, sir!” I said triumphantly, and dragged professor Aronnax with me down.

Chapter Text

I wondered what the officer might have answered, had the Captain not been ready to see us again. Regardless, I had been victorious. I had spoken with one of the previously deaf and mute crew! Me and Aronnax walked towards the library, a bit too fast to be dignified, really, but who would know? We stepped into the dining room, and the double doors were open. Stood in the middle of the room, his posture regal as always, head bent over a book in his hands, was Captain Nemo. Seeing him again after so many days took my breath away, and I was glad for the distance between us, to have a moment to compose myself. He seemed an apparition, I had thought of him so often, yet somehow my memory had not done him justice. Christ, I lack the words to describe him, all adjectives sound painfully bleak. He looked up from the book, and seemed slightly perplexed for a second, then said in an aimable tone;

“Ah, professor, miss Larsson, please come in, take a seat.” He gestured to the sofas by him in the library, and I believe the professor was as glad to have me there for moral support as I was him. The Captain made no mention of his absence, and although I was dying of curiosity, I held my tongue. 

“Forgive me, I wasn’t expecting you in here so early. Breakfast is not yet ready, but you are welcome to join me when it is.” Not being able to resist the temptation, I said smiling;

“Oh, not to worry, it’s our fault for inquiring after you!” His calm face revealed nothing, but his eyes flashed.

“Oh? And you were told you’d find me in here?”

“Yes, your chief officer was most helpful,” I said innocently. I felt the professor tense beside me, he was not a man who liked to play games. I could see Nemo make a mental note to have a serious talk with his officer. I didn’t know what orders the crew had been given not to talk to us, or why, but I had a feeling the Captain wouldn't let them be broken twice. I could almost feel bad, but the thought of the officer having to explain how he’d disobeyed the order was just too funny. In the same calm voice as always, the Captain replied;

“I’m glad to hear it.” Then, inconspicuously dropping the subject as if it had been nothing, continued. 

“I wanted to see you today to extend an invitation. After breakfast, one of my men and myself will venture out on a hunt in my forests of Crespo Island, and should you be amenable, you are welcome to join us.” A hunt in the forests of Crespo Island! Both me and the professor were too surprised to answer at first. So Captain Nemo and his crew went ashore after all, despite his assurances to the contrary! It was Aronnax who first found his voice.

“With pleasure, Capitaine, I’m sure! Only, sir, I’ll take the liberty of addressing a question to you.”

“Address away, Professor Aronnax, and if I’m able to answer, I will.” 

“D’accord, Capitaine, how is it that you’ve severed all ties with the shore, yet you own forests on Crespo Island?”

The Captain proceeded to inform us that these were in fact underwater forests, which answered most of my questions, but the professor seemed even more confounded. He kept questioning Nemo on his methods, all to which he calmly replied, but in the end Aronnax seemed to mostly question the Captain’s sanity. I had to interject.

“We are to go diving, then, is what you’re saying, sir?” 

“Correct, miss,” the Captain said appreciatively. “Would you be interested in joining us? I think experience has taught me by now that you would object to being left behind.” He said this in a joking tone, raising his eyebrows. I smiled at him.

“You know me all too well, Captain. I would not miss it for the world. Although, I will forgo the rifle for everyone’s safety.” He smiled back, and it made my breath hitch. I was flustered, was that really all it took for me to lose my composure? If the Captain noticed, he paid it no attention, for which I was grateful. At that moment, we heard a voice utter a few words in the unknown language from the dining room.

“Ah! Breakfast is served. Please, join me.” The Captain arose, and we went with him. Aronnax still looked sceptical of the whole venture. For breakfast, we were served another spread of various dishes of marine origin, and had it not been for the great variety each day, I would have already been tired of them. However, this morning Nemo also offered us a drink of liquor, fermented from a type of seaweed called ‘something Palmata ’, I can never remember the exact name. I declined, feeling that it was too early for alcohol, but made a mental note of its existence. The discussion during breakfast consisted mainly of the Captain explaining to Aronnax how the diving suits, the air tanks, the electric rifles and every piece of equipment we were to use worked. I did pay attention, but was frankly impatient to get going. I had always loved snorkelling, and was eager to be back in the underwater world, especially one previously unknown to me. I was completely uninterested in the hunt, but was incredibly excited to see what plants and animals lived off the shore of this Crespo Island.

Chapter Text

Conseil and Ned Land had also been invited on the hunt, but the latter declined when he was informed that it would not take place on terra firma. If I’d been him, I would have sorely regretted missing out. The experience was indescribable, I felt as though I was walking in a dream. The slow movements we were limited to enhanced this feeling, and it was wondrous. Once I’d collected myself a little, I turned around, and saw the Nautilus . She was resting on the sea floor, and I was finally able to study what she looked like from the outside. Contemplating where and when I was, I think this was the first time I felt truly thankful for getting to experience all of this, rather than being filled with cold dread. Emboldened by the feeling, I continued on with my companions. Our group consisted of the Captain, Professor Aronnax, Conseil, myself, and a man from the crew who I would have described as a body-builder, but whom the professor admiringly described as “herculean”. After walking for a short while , we experienced the most beautiful light phenomenon, which Aronnax would later explain to me in detail. At the time, I was just awestruck by the myriads of rainbows dancing around us. I clasped his hand, squeezing it, and he squeezed mine back. We were once again joined by our mutual reverence for the sea, never having to express as much in words. Captain Nemo gestured for us to follow along with him, which we did. After walking through these wonders for less than two hours, he stopped, and pointed to the silhouette of a large kelp forest ahead. After another hour, we had ventured into it, and our leader allowed us a break. Trying to take in everything we’d seen, and desperate to convey my enthusiasm to my companions, I gave two thumbs up. The gesture was pathetically inadequate to encompass the magic of this underwater world, and I could see both the professor and the Captain shrugging with laughter at me. I smiled. Oh well, they understood what I meant. 

The expedition continued all day, to my delight, for I don’t believe it was possible to ever tire of the sights we beheld. I did not partake in the hunting, but was overjoyed to just bear witness to the creatures who called this world their home. I often strayed a little from the group to study some unusual inhabitant of the depth, but my companions were easy to spot. Especially when we were so deep down we had to turn on what I would have described as our flashlights. Despite not tiring of the sights, eventually, my body was exhausted. The others must have been in the same state, for it was time to turn back. Soon, I could see the Nautilus at a distance of about half a mile. We were moving at a slow pace, and I felt I had time to venture off slightly to take one last look at some sea anemones I spotted. They were absolutely delightful, and I was sat on my bent knee for a short while, looking at them. All of a sudden, I saw movement in the corner of my eye, and I arose. My companions were all gesturing violently, pointing at me. ‘What?’ I saw one of them, who must have been Nemo, judging by his build, running towards me. It was slow work underwater, but I understood the urgency, and thought to turn around. Behind me, only a few meters away, were two large blue sharks, upwards of three meters long. Not looking terribly ferocious, they gave me a start, but I did not panic. I remembered most sharks were rarely aggressive, and would not attack me unless I acted like prey. I guess I must have been unlucky, for one of these opportunistic feeders made a move towards me. Rather than losing my wits, I strangely just thought that the shark was being quite rude! Nothing about me suggested prey, I was stood perfectly still! I braced myself, feeling I’d seen enough videos to pretty much know what to do. As the shark was upon me, I gently, but decidedly, grabbed its nose and pushed it away, forcing the fish to swim off. It didn’t seem to mind much, and moved on to look for easier prey. I turned back around, and saw the group all frozen in place. Captain Nemo had stopped just a few meters away, and even though I could not see any facial expressions through the diving helmets, everyone’s body language screamed astonishment. Remembering himself, Nemo gestured for us all to go back to the Nautilus .

Chapter Text

Back onboard, and having been freed from the clumsy suits, the Captain wasted no time. He grabbed me by the shoulders, and almost shook me. The others were just staring.

“What did you do?!” I was stunned, had I done something wrong? Was I meant to kill the shark for our hunt? With what weapon?! The Captain repeated his words.

“What did you do ?”

“I… I pushed the shark away..?” 

“Exactly! What were you thinking? You should be dead!”

“Oh, thanks a lot!” I answered sarcastically. With a look of bewilderment, he said sternly;

“Miss, the salon, if you please!”

Captain Nemo was flying down the gangway, I struggled to keep up. Why was he so angry? I was more shaken from his reaction than from the event which had provoked it.

“Captain? Please, I don’t know what I’ve done wrong! Will you tell me why you’re so upset with me?” He gave no answer, but as soon as we entered the salon, he grabbed me by the shoulders again. He looked deeply into my eyes, with furrowed brows, and I felt my breath hitch again. Without warning, he pulled me into a tight embrace. My brain completely short-circuited. He was so warm, and somehow smelled so good, even after our long excursion. I closed my eyes, and breathed deeply. The moment was over before it had began, and I was snapped back to reality. The Captain had let me go, and was pacing the floor now. My head was swimming, I had to sit down.

“Do not ever venture from the group again in that manner, or you shall never come on another outing again as long as I live, do you hear me?”

“I- yes, I’m sorry. I did not know it was forbidden!” I said, confused. Is this why he was so enraged, that I’d disobeyed some unspoken order? I’d been walking a little ways away from the group often during the day without getting reprimanded, and so had the professor, and Conseil!  

“You didn’t have a weapon of your own, and you were right in the line of fire between us and the shark. That man-eater should have ended you, so I ask you again, what did you do ?” I stared at him. I’d seen videos on Instagram where girls in just their bikinis pushed away sharks twice the size of the one I’d met, as if it was nothing. I’d also watched enough documentaries to know that sharks have sensitive organs in their noses, which makes it one of the most vulnerable points on their body. Somehow I doubted either of these explanations would suit Captain Nemo. I tried stalling, lightening the mood.

“Well, like you said, it was a man -eater, so I was obviously safe…” My voice trailed off as the Captain fixed his hard gaze on me, as if to say ‘ not the time ’. I swallowed some sarcastic comment about ‘female intuition’, and decided to once again stick as close to the truth as possible. 

“I think I read it somewhere, that sharks’ noses are very sensitive, so…”

“So you thought to test the theory, by risking your life?!”

“Well, blue sharks aren’t exactly ferocious, I’m sure it was just trying to see if I was worth the effort. A little gentle dissuasion was all that was needed!” 

“Gentle dissuasion?” He stared at me, with a look that questioned my sanity as assuredly as if I’d told him about Instagram and BBC Earth. He crossed his arms, and shook his head. “God help me…” 

“Well, what else was I supposed to do? Just stand there and let it eat me?”

“No, of course not, you were supposed to move out of the way, or better yet, stay with the group in the first place!”

“Had I moved, that would have triggered its hunting instinct, and it would have put a whole lot more effort into the attack! My method was safer.” His look of bewilderment, disbelief, and annoyance at this told me he must think me mad by now. We were getting nowhere with our argument, so I finally conceded. I could still not grasp the reason behind such a violent reaction from the forever temperate Captain. There was no way I’d convince him I’d not been in grave danger, so I told him what I thought he wanted to hear. 

“Alright, I already told you I was sorry. I won’t risk my life to look at sea anemones again!” I used a fairly sarcastic tone to emphasise the phrase ‘risk my life’, conveying that I thought this was a gross exaggeration of what had happened. At first, it looked as though Captain Nemo would continue to berate me, as if my concession had not been humble enough, but then he sighed and let down his shoulders. With a final look of reproach, he gave in, and his face softened with a tired smile. 

“I’m glad to hear it, I should be very sorry to part with you so soon.” With those words, he gave a small bow, and retired to his stateroom. I was left to ponder what this whole outburst had been about, and was unable to shake the sound of his voice, telling me he’d be sorry to part with me…

Chapter Text

The next morning, when Pierre came to wake me up, I refused to go with him. I’d not had nearly enough sleep, tossing and turning all night from thinking of the Captain’s words, not to mention his embrace... I sighed deeply, and flipped my pillow over in another vain attempt to fall back asleep.

As with most meals, I was served breakfast at my desk by the same steward as the first day. Since I was still trying to catch up on my lost sleep, he woke me when he appeared with the tray, and seemed uncomfortable to find me in bed. I didn’t bother trying to excuse myself, I just muttered a thanks and turned to face the wall. It’s not like he would have understood what I’d said anyway. Then a thought hit me. Had Nemo told me the truth when he said the steward spoke no English? The chief officer clearly did. I wondered when, not if, I would have to pay for my decision to trick the poor man. Shaking off the uncomfortable thought, I went back to sleep for a second time.

I was awoken for the third time by a knock at the door. Holy shit, was it illegal to sleep in on this damned boat?! Annoyed, I just gave a curt shout. 

“What?” I immediately came to regret this, as the door opened and revealed the reason for my lack of sleep. I sat up in bed, startled. Then, I remembered all was wearing was one of the thin, billowing shirts, which had helpfully decided to start slipping off of my shoulder. My eyes widened, and I hastened to pull the covers up to my chin. Captain Nemo stepped into the room, and to my great shock, sat down at the foot of the bed. 

“Please, forgive the intrusion. I met the professor up on the platform just now, and he informed me you had not wanted to accompany him this morning. I thought you might be unwell from yesterday’s turmoil, and wanted check on you.” I was stunned. He knew his conduct last night had left me sleepless? Was I that transparent? After a moment or two, I realised that no, of course, he meant the shark attack! Christ, I had completely forgotten about that! I stuttered at first, trying to answer him.

“I, uh- yes… I couldn’t sleep.” ‘I couldn’t stop thinking about you’.

“I’m not surprised, that is the usual effect of a near-death experience.” His eyes were distant saying this, as if remembering. I studied him, desperate to know what he might be thinking of. A second later though, he snapped out of it. 

“I will ask that you be given some kelp tea, with calming properties. That should help.” Instead of leaving, he stayed seated. He seemed he had something more to say, but wasn’t sure how to go about it. It was very unlike him. I watched him, but was too dazed to come up with a way to ask. Eventually, he said in his usual, frank way;

“So, miss Larsson, I heard about the unfortunate fellow who had to undergo that dreadful surgery.” I was at a loss. What? Who? Nemo saw my confusion, and raising an eyebrow, continued.

“Apparently though, he’d pulled through, and was ‘all right’ now.” This woke me up as sure as an ice bucket over my head. My hands flew up to cover my mouth, and I tried to stifle a laugh, but was unsuccessful in my sleep-deprived state. I squeezed my eyes shut, dear God, I’d be in trouble now, but I couldn’t help but laugh. After a moment, I managed to collect myself, and as much as I dreaded it, met Nemo’s eyes. I expected him to be cold and reprimanding, but found him trying to suppress a smile as well. I lowered my hands, and said in astonishment;

“You are not cross with me?” He looked away, and shrugged slightly.

“I suppose I ought to be, you tricking my men like that, but…” Meeting my eyes again with a half-smile, he continued; “it was a clever way of doing so.” Emboldened by his good mood, I smiled and said daringly;

“Did you think it was funny?” 

“Me? No, I have a much too sophisticated sense of humour.” My God, he was making jokes back. I could scarcely believe my ears. “But I believe Kumar has told the whole crew by now, and some of them seem to think so.” 

“Kumar…” I repeated, amazed at being given his name. I was beyond astonished. I had thought I’d be met with irritation at best, yet the Captain seemed… appreciative? It was the strangest thing, I didn’t know what to make of it. 

“Captain, does that mean I might be allowed to speak to Kumar again? If only just to keep him informed on how the patient is faring.” My disarming joke was met with another smile, but the Captain was serious again when he answered me.

“They will not share any more with you than I do, I can assure you.” I nodded.

“I’m sure they won’t. They are beyond a doubt fiercely loyal to their Captain, and would never willingly disobey an order,” I said appeasingly. Then a thought struck me. 

“Sir, I hope Kumar isn’t in trouble. I take full responsibility for his involuntary disobedience, and if you feel someone ought to be penalized, let it be me.” Captain Nemo looked at me, incredulous, then said;

“Miss Larsson, I appreciate the sentiment, it is an honourable thought, but rest assured no one will be penalized for this. The only order I gave my crew was to not reveal any of our secrets to our new passengers, so as to keep you free from complicity.” 

“But then… they’ve not been forbidden from speaking to us? I thought you’d ordered them to only use your… your Nautilese around us!” His eyes went wide, then he bent his head back, and giving an honest to God laugh. I was dumbstruck. He gave me a fond smile. 

“‘Nautilese!’ Miss, your comments never cease to amuse me.” He sobered slightly, and informed me;

“You are welcome to speak to any of the crew, though not all of them understand English. And even if they do, I cannot promise that they will want to answer.” With that, he finally arose. 

“I’ll have that tea brought over. I do hope you will recover swiftly.” Before leaving, he took my hand, and for a second, I thought he might kiss it. But he only bowed, then quickly exited the room. It was the first time our skin had touched since that morning, when his presence brought me out of panic, and the effect was just as strong this time. I was still trying to reel myself in from the whole interaction when the steward arrived with a steaming cup of the promised tea.

Chapter Text

Having drunk the cup of relaxing tea, I did finally manage to drift off into an uninterrupted sleep. I don’t know what time it was when I awoke, and the Nautilus ’s corridors were silent as always. I had already begun suspecting that the Captain had shown us only the bare necessities on our tour of the submarine, otherwise there was no way we wouldn’t run in to the crewmembers more often. That is, if they truly stayed onboard constantly. Me and Aronnax had counted upwards of thirty different faces so far, and we got the best chance to see them when we had our daily stroll up on the platform. Twice now we’d watched a large group haul up the nets left overnight to supply the Nautilus with all kinds of marine animals that furnished our galley. We did not speak of it, but we both looked at their athletic forms appreciatively. The Captain was not the only handsome man onboard, if by far the most captivating. What we did speak of though, was where the crewmembers might originate from, to better determine why they had joined the enigmatic Captain’s secret mission, and what it might be. Aronnax was of the opinion that they were all of European ethnicities, but I disagreed. To me, it looked like same mix of people you might see in modern day London, meaning they could have come from all over the world. There were a number of definetively European-looking crewmembers, but I was convinced there were several from North Africa, South America, the Caribbean, the Middle East, and certainly India. It was of course hard to tell though, with them all still ignoring us and insisting on speaking only Nautilese in front of us. We were also constantly trying to figure out the Captain’s origin, as it would provide by far the most important clue to who he was, and what had happened to him.

Feeling wide awake, and sick of laying in bed, I decided to get dressed and head to the salon. If I was lucky, the panels would be open, and I might lie down on the sofa in front of the window and watch the underwater world outside pass by. It had become my favourite thing to do, and I would stay there for hours at a time, while speaking to my companions, or simply enjoy the view in silence. As I reached the door to the dining room, I heard faint musical notes. I was stunned at first, before remembering that there was indeed an organ in the lounge. During our first visit in there, I had been so preoccupied with the innumerable works of art and treasures it contained, that I had completely overlooked the instrument. Since then, I had not given it much thought, I didn’t play myself, and neither did my fellow convicts. Now, however, someone was playing. It was a beautiful piece, but its forlorn melody made my heart ache. I wondered who of the mysterious crew might be such a gifted musician, and could not contain my curiosity, so I opened the door. The sound of the mournful music increased, but the whole sequence of rooms were laid in darkness. I walked through the open doors to the library, trying to see who was sat at the organ. The only light came in through the crystal windows, blue and shifting with the waves. I realised it must be nighttime. I could only just detect the silhouette moving his hands over the keys, but I would recognise that silhouette anywhere. I froze in the doorway, suddenly regretting my nosiness. I had clearly walked into a private moment, this music was not meant to be shared, but a vulnerable outpouring of emotion, its source a heartbreak beyond measure. I was in absolute panic, I did not know what to do with myself. I wanted to leave before he noticed me, but found I dared not move. Instead, I stood there, silent, listening to Captain Nemo’s despair, conveyed through some of the most beautiful music I had ever heard. I’m not sure if the moment lasted ten minutes or an hour, time ceased to exist, and eventually I forgot my anxiety, I was so wrapped up in the melody. I was still dazed when he eventually stopped playing, bringing his hands up to his face, and sighing deeply. He then arose slowly, and before I remembered I existed, he turned around. 

Chapter Text

Despite the darkness, he must have seen me, for he stopped in his tracks and stiffened. I could not see his facial expression, and my fear came back even stronger. How would he be able to forgive this intrusion into his deepest feelings, he who always strived to appear so emotionless? We stood there, silent, for several moments. Cold sweat started to break out on my forehead, and I still could not move, could not break the terrible silence. Finally, the Captain spoke up. 

“Eleonora. What are you doing here?” His voice betrayed none of the anger he must be feeling, yet I started shaking.

“I- I’m so sorry. Please, forgive me! I did not mean to- to…” I was stuttering, I could not finish my sentence, did not know how to. Captain Nemo started walking towards me, and I realised my vision had contracted in the typical way it does during an anxiety attack. Before long, I might faint, but thought it was perhaps just as well, if it meant I could postpone facing the inevitable wrath of the Captain. He reached me, and I felt as though all oxygen going to my brain had been cut off. ‘Oh, it has’, I found myself thinking, for I could not take even the shallowest breath, and was swaying where I stood. Just as I was about to lose consciousness, a pair of strong hands gripped my upper arms. I was brought back to reality, took a sharp breath in, and met the Captain’s eyes. They looked completely black in the dim light, and with the reflections from the water dancing over his face, it was a mesmerising sight. 

“Eleonora, are you unwell? You look as though you’re about to faint!” He still did not sound angry, only concern tinged his voice, but I still found myself unable to reply. 

“Come, sit down.” He lead me to one of the sofas, and then went over to a small side table containing several crystal decanters. He came back with two glasses, handed me one, and sat down next to me.

“Please, miss, have a drink. You seem to be in dire need of it.” Still unable to form a coherent thought of my own, I brought the glass to my lips and drank. Whatever liquid was in it had a strong, sweet taste, not unpleasant at all. I glanced at him, and he seemed to read my mind. 

“The Palmata liquor, miss. Please, will you tell me what is the matter?” I took another sip, trying my utmost to do as he said. My answer came out barely a whisper.

“I am so sorry. I truly did not mean to intrude, I heard the music and was so intrigued. I wished to know who played so beautifully. I did not think…” My voice trailed off, I was gripping the glass, too scared to meet Nemo’s eyes. Before saying anything, he too took a hefty swig of the liquor. 

“You were so worried that you’d interrupted me that you were close to fainting? Almighty God, what have I done to instill that kind of fear in you? When have I ever been irate, or even reprimanding?” As was most often the case with the Captain, his reaction confused me. Was he not angry with me this time either? But just yesterday, he had scolded me to the high heavens for my little encounter with the blue shark. I truly never knew what to expect of this man. I felt I had to say something. Still with my voice weak, I put forward my objection.

“But, sir, yesterday… You attacked me worse than the shark did in the end.” I dared another glace at him, and could barely make out a half-smile. 

“I am sorry if I frightened you, miss. I was not angry, I was scared.” Without thinking, in my surprise, I blurted out;

“Scared? Of what? The shark?” I was looking at him now, trying to decipher what he could possibly mean. He was looking back, but there was no way to read his facial expression in the dark permeating the salon. 

“No, not of the shark, I was in no danger. I was scared for you. As I said, I would be very sorry to part with you, Eleonora.” That was the third time he’d used my name tonight, and now that I was in no danger of fainting, it truly registered. I was suddenly grateful for the dark, or he would have seen me blush at this, and at his confession. Could that really have been the reason for his behaviour after our outing? I couldn’t think of what to say to him, so I brought the glass to my lips again, looking away. I felt I owed him an apology still.

“Captain, tonight, you would have had every right to be angry with me. I should not have come in to the salon when I did.” He seemed to consider this for a moment, but then said;

“I have put the room at your full disposal, therefore you have done nothing wrong. Although, I appreciate the concern you have for whatever reason you think I would be upset with you for entering it.” So, he was going to pretend as if I had not heard what I had. I should have seen that coming, but was not quite willing to let it go. 

“It was a beautiful melody, sir. I did not recognise it, who is the composer?” He did not reply, but had another sip from his glass, looking out the crystal window. 

“Do you play, miss?” Not budging then, huh. I would have to leave it, for now. 

“I’m afraid not. I greatly appreciate music, and I do sing, but unfortunately I play no instruments.” This peaked his interest.

“You sing? I should like to hear it!” I almost choked on my drink. Coughing slightly, with a disarming gesture, I began;

“Oh god no, please, I don’t…”

“And why not? You have just heard me play the organ, would it not only be fair?” I was squirming now, I supposed he was right, but I really couldn’t, didn’t want to sing in front of people. 

“Sir, I would need at least five or six of these before I felt comfortable singing in front of anyone!” I said, holding up my drink. I saw his white teeth bared in a smile at this.

“Ah, but as you know, I am not anyone, I am No one, remember?” I couldn’t help but smile at this as well, and downed the rest of the drink.

“Listen, Odysseus, you have set the bar extremely high for any musical performance, and I’m not sure I could follow it!” He said nothing, only continued smiling, expectantly. I hid my hands in my face.

“Christ… Alright, fine. Uhm…” I tried to think of a song I knew well, that wasn’t too hard to sing, but most importantly, with lyrics that wouldn’t sound strange in 1867. Leaves out quite a few, doesn’t it? I closed my eyes, and began softly.

“Are you going to Scarborough Fair?

Parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme

Remember me to one who lives there

She once was a true love of mine”

As I continued singing, I felt more sure of myself. The outside world slowly faded away as I lost myself in the familiarity of the song, which meant so much to me. My voice was a steady mezzo-soprano, and I was quite a talented singer, despite hating performing. At least when sober. Soon though, I’d sang all the verses, and had almost forgot where I was as I opened my eyes. Captain Nemo was looking at me intently. At first, he said nothing, and I no longer felt so sure of myself at all. After all, he was clearly a man of culture, this was easy to see just from looking around the room, and he had probably frequented the opera during his time in the capitals of the world. I was berating myself for agreeing to sing, when suddenly he took my hand. I met his eyes as he brought it to his lips, and gave it a genteel kiss, before holding my hand in both of his.

“What a gift! Thank you. Thank you!” he said, earnestly. I was stunned. 

“It has been a long time since I heard such a beautiful voice. Eleonora, I do hope you will sing often!” I think I would have been agreeable to anything he’d asked me in that moment, so exuberant was I at his reaction, so I only nodded happily. 

Chapter Text

The next day, I was already up on the platform, watching the first rays of dawn when Professor Aronnax appeared. 

“Mademoiselle, vous voilà! I was looking for you.”

“Professor! Me voilà! Come sit down!” I said, smiling. I’d not been alone with my dear friend these past two days, and had much to tell. He sat next to me, and we watched the sunset together. I hadn’t gone to sleep at all since last night’s encounter with the Captain. Before retiring, he’d told me the time was four in the morning, much later (or earlier) than I’d thought! I hadn’t questioned why he himself had been awake at that hour, not wanting to intrude on his privacy even more. He’d told me to get some more sleep, but after sleeping most of the day, and some of the night, it didn’t seem likely to happen. Especially not considering what had transpired between us. The events from two days ago, after the shark attack, had been enough to keep me up for most of the night. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be able to go to sleep again with what had happened in the early hours of this morning. It was so intimate, the music, the lights from the ocean outside dancing on his face, him kissing my hand… I felt I could not even tell the professor of this meeting. I did, however, tell him first of our argument, and then of the Captain’s visit to my cabin. He was astonished, to say the least. The Captain’s reactions were as unexpected to him as they had been to me. 

“He was not cross with you? He seemed enraged after the dive! And I thought for certain he would have our heads for tricking his chief officer.”

“Me too! It was the strangest thing! In fact, he told me the officer’s name - Kumar!”

“Kumar…” the professor repeated, in the same wonderment I’d shown. We had both been certain that the crew would remain as much of a mystery to us as the Captain, and even more so, since they would not speak to us! Aronnax was intrigued at the thought that they were not forbidden from doing so at all, but simply chose not to. We might have been insulted, but both understood that they had not chosen to find themselves in such close proximity to us, and really had no obligation to get to know us. Despite this, I was determined to try. I do not know if I had truly grasped the concept of never leaving the Nautilus , but at present this was my situation, I had no way out of it, and I was adamant I’d make the best of it. With this in mind, I addressed Kumar when he, as usual, came up on deck to scan the horizon.

“Good morning, Kumar!” If he was surprised at me knowing his name, he made no show of it. Perhaps the Captain had filled him in. Regardless, Kumar did not answer, but did acknowledge our existence with a nod. I was not giving up, and before he could say it, I interjected;

“Let me guess - nautron respoc lorni virch?” He lowered his spyglass and looked at me with a difficult to read expression. I smiled at him, and to my surprise, he smiled back, with a small chuckle. 

“Correct, miss Larsson.” He turned, and repeated the phrase in his usual manner. Before heading back down, he gave us a small bow.

“Good day.” Me and the professor both looked at each other with excitement. This was progress indeed!

We spent the rest of the day in the salon, in the company of Conseil and Ned Land. They were in a heated discussion, I think the topic was on whether Ned could really call himself a fisherman, with whales not being fish, but I could not make it all out in French. The window panels were open still, and I tried to follow Aronnax’s example of sketching the animals passing by outside. I was nowhere near as talented, but had so missed doing art, and while the professor’s sketches were all perfectly life-like, I took some artistic liberties. With inspiration from our current vista, and our excursion the other day, I created fantasy underwater landscapes. I only wished I’d had some colours to make them come to life, but the only thing at our disposal was the black squid ink. 

Chapter Text

The following days were spent in a very similar way, and unless he hid a meeting from me as I did him, neither I nor the professor saw the Captain at all. I did find I had trouble sleeping, wondering where he was, what he was doing, who he was, why he was hiding… 

I sometimes felt claustrophobic in my cabin when I couldn’t sleep, and would come into the salon at night. Perhaps I was hoping for another chance encounter, and to get to hear Captain Nemo playing his beautiful music again, but so far I’d had no such luck. Instead, I’d work on my drawings, which were spread all over one of the sofas at this point. When I wasn’t drawing, I’d lie down by the large crystal windows, whose panels remained perpetually open in these calm Pacific waters, and watch the sea go by. It had the most calming effect on me, and one night, after several restless ones, I must have drifted off. 

I had no idea how long I’d been asleep when I opened my eyes. It was still dark outside, but my eyes fixed on the tall figure standing a few meters away. He said simply, as if we’d been in the middle of a conversation, rather than not having seen each other for many days;

“Ah, I see now that your verdict on the professor’s artistic skills have come from a source of personal experience. You are a talented artist yourself, Eleonora.” I thought I might be dreaming at first, but soon quickened, and I realised the Captain was holding a couple of my drawings in his hands. I cleared my throat and rose on one elbow.

“Oh, I’m sorry, let me tidy up a bit. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” He looked at me then, but I could not read his expression.

“Perhaps you needed it,” he said, in a slightly bitter tone. I was too drowsy to even begin to try and decipher what he meant. Regarding the drawings once more, he picked up a few different ones, studying them all carefully. 

“These truly are quite marvelous. What imagination you have, creating such images from the life we see in these waters.”

“Thank you, Captain. You’re too kind.” As I said this, I saw him tense up, and then reach for another paper. Too late, I realised what it must be. When I was alone in here at night, I would sometimes veer from my normal aquatic motifs, and instead draw what was constantly on the forefront of my mind. His tall figure, the black, slightly curly hair, the straight nose, the sensuous lips behind the thick beard, and most often, his large, dark eyes. Mortified, I closed my eyes again. There was nothing to be done now, he’d seen the paper cluttered with his likeness, over and over again. I felt sick, I wished the window would burst and drown us both so I would never have to deal with this abysmal embarrassment. Nemo was silent for a long time, or at least it felt that way, before speaking. 

“Your landscapes are beautiful, but you are a born portrait artist.” His voice was plain, and it took me a second to register what he’d said. Perhaps at this point, I should have been used to his calm reactions, yet for some reason I still expected fury. I finally dared to open my eyes, and when they met his, there was something new in them. I could not quite place it, was it a fire? Was he angry after all? But - no. It was something else. Something like… triumph. Putting down the drawings, he bowed with an indecipherable facial expression, and bid me goodnight before retiring to his stateroom. 

After gathering up the drawings and hurrying back to my cabin, I sank down on the floor. It no longer felt claustrophobic, it was my refuge. I closed my eyes, hoping I would open them again in the lounge and realise Captain Nemo had never come in there, never seen my drawings of him. But it had happened, and there was nothing I could do to change that now. What must he think of me? What had the look in his eyes meant? He’d said I was a born portrait artist, did that mean he approved of my drawing him, or had there been some hidden meaning behind the words? I cursed the Captain, and his mysterious nature, which led me to always second guess his actions. I thought of the last time we’d been alone together in the salon. The one time I’d gotten close to him, when he’d been open and honest with me, and not been afraid to show his feelings. That time, I had almost dared to hope that, perhaps one day in the future, he would feel something for me. I’d had a glimpse of what it felt like, to be loved by him, my Odysseus… But no. I took a sharp breath in, and went to splash some water on my face. What was I doing? Had I really given up all thoughts of trying to get back home, to my life, my time , just for the chance to be near a man whose name I did not even know? It was madness, yet the thought of being parted from him was more painful than any homesickness I felt.

Chapter Text

“Aj, jävlar!” The cry startled me awake, before realising what I’d heard. My previously mute steward had uttered these words, in Swedish ! My eyes widened, and my mouth hung open. The man had put his finger in his mouth, clearly having burnt himself on one of the dishes on my breakfast tray, but when he glanced at me he froze. He’d realised his blunder. My gaping mouth turned into a triumphant smile. His eyes closed in defeat. I pulled the covers around me, and arose, immediately starting my interrogation. At first he was very short and dismissive, but softened slightly after hearing his mother tongue. I remembered the Captain’s words, that none of the crew would reveal any information to us, so I only asked him a few simple questions. I found out his name, Oskar, and his birthplace, Lidköping. 

“Så det stämmer, som kaptenen sa, att ni inte talar engelska?” (“So it’s true, what the Captain said, that you do not speak English?”)

”Det stämmer, frun.” (“It is true, madam.”)

”Nåväl, det kommer ju inte vara något problem i framtiden, nu när vi kan tala svenska med varandra!” (“Well, that won’t be a problem in the future, now that we can speak Swedish with one other!”) I said, putting my hand on his forearm, with a wide grin. I don’t know whether it was my touch or my words that made him uncomfortable, but he withdrew. 

”Jag tror inte att vi kommer ha många tillfällen att talas vid, frun.” (“I don’t think we’ll have many opportunities to speak with each other, madam.”) I stared at him, why was he being so dismissive? I would have to find a way to get him to like me, the thought of there being a countryman on board and me not being able to talk to him was absurd. There was so much I wanted to ask him, not only the forbidden questions to do with the Nautilus and her mission, but also about his life. The chance to hear about what living in Sweden was like a hundred and fifty years before my time, and from a first hand account, was irresistible to a history nerd such as myself. However, I realised it would take a while to get to that point, and that I wasn’t doing myself any favours by keeping Oskar here when he clearly wished to leave. I smiled at him again, and said:

”Jag förstår. Tack för frukosten, Oskar. Det var trevligt att äntligen träffa er officiellt.” (“I understand. Thank you for breakfast, Oskar. It was nice to finally meet you officially.”) He seemed relieved at this, gave a courteous answer, before giving a small bow and leaving. 

This revelation had given me much to think about, and I hurriedly ate my breakfast, to quicker be able to find Professor Aronnax and talk it over with him. Seeing that both the library and salon were empty, I went through the gangway behind door in the canted corner, and knocked at his cabin. 

“Entrez!” I opened the door, and saw Pierre sat at his desk, pouring over his extensive notes. I smiled fondly at him, he was so engrossed he had not even taken note of who had come in. 

“Bonjour, mon ami.” He finally looked up, and quickly arose, always the perfect gentleman.

“Ah, c’est vous, mademoiselle! Bonjour,” he said, bowing. I laughed, the formality was endearing, but I sometimes found it exhausting, and would occasionally forgo it. I wished the professor might one day relax a bit around me too, but today was not that day. He offered me his seat at the desk, the only one in the room, and sat down on the bed himself. 

“You have slept well, mademoiselle?” he enquired in a concerned tone. He was aware of the restlessness I had been experiencing, and I think he had perhaps also guessed the cause of it. I wondered if he was affected in the same way.

“Oui, bien, monsieur, merci.” I did try and speak French whenever I could, as I knew speaking English made him slightly uncomfortable. Aronnax held himself to a very high standard, and despite his English being nearly perfect apart from his clear accent, he did not consider himself fluent. I’d decided to make the effort to better my limited French, to perhaps also be able to speak to Conseil at some point, without someone translating for us. However, my news were too urgent to struggle with expressing them, so I reverted to our normal language of conversation. You can imagine the professors excitement and astonishment at finally finding out the nationality of one of the crew, and his genuine glee at it being a countryman of mine! 

“Mademoiselle, if all the Suédois are as delightful as yourself, I can never know too many!” I squirmed a bit at this.

“You are too kind as always, professor. I’m not sure Oskar feels the same way for his own people, having deserted home and country for the Nautilus . Captain Nemo must have told him I was Swedish, for he immediately realised he’d been found out after swearing. He clearly has no interest in knowing me, he’s never uttered a word before in all the weeks we’ve been here!” I lamented, quite dismayed at my steward’s attitude. I did hope that we might perhaps be friends in the future, but his behavior up until this point wasn’t promising. 

“Do not despair, chérie, I can guarantee he is simply shy in the presence of a beautiful, young woman such as yourself.” I laughed at this, not only because I disagreed with the professor’s assessment of my qualities, but also because Oskar did not strike me as shy. If anything, he was annoyed at having to wait on me. I wondered how that had come about, and thought perhaps it was not so strange that he should be annoyed with me, if my presence onboard had added to his workload. Although, the Captain didn’t seem as if he would impose the task on one of his crew if they were unwilling. It was all quite strange, really, and in the end we could not make heads or tails of it. Nor did Oskar’s nationality offer up any of the evidence we were so desperately looking for, so we had only to go back to our normal daytime activities in the lounge.

Chapter Text

The days continued on in the same fashion, the waters of the Pacific Ocean passing by outside our windows, as unchanging as our routine. The only excitement we would experience was when some unusual fish or cetacean made an appearance, or when one of us would run into the elusive Captain. These interactions were all very brief, and I for one was thankful for this. I was not quite ready to face him again properly, after our last, mortifying meeting. I could still not think of this without blushing, and I’m ashamed to admit I kept this meeting also a secret from the professor. I wondered if he, too, was hiding any encounters with the object of our shared admiration, but could not ask without admitting my own betrayal. Or, for that matter, without insinuating what I now firmly believed to be the truth of the professor’s disposition. Not the least bit shocking to me, I still knew it was not something people spoke of openly in the 1800s, and did not want to humiliate or alienate the man who was my greatest comfort through this strange existence. 

Not having talked to Captain Nemo for a couple of weeks, but for a few brief exchanges of polite phrases, I had finally calmed down and managed to get back to a normal sleep schedule. This would, however, be disrupted all too soon. On December 11th, me and the other ‘convicts’ were as usual sat in the lounge, when we witnessed the most dreadful sight I’d ever laid eyes on. Admittedly, I was a middle-class woman from a first world country in the 21st century, so perhaps that doesn’t say much. My companions’ reactions are a better indication of the horror that passed outside the window, and they were aghast. It would not be the last ship wreck we would witness, but the sight of this first one, with the corpses of its victims still fresh, made me rush out of the salon to hurl. As I came out of the bathroom, shaken to my core, I found my friends all waiting worriedly in the corridor. I broke down in tears, and these kind, gallant men comforted me as best they could. I refused to go back into the lounge, the images still etched in my head, so Professor Aronnax followed me to my cabin and tried to put me to bed. When I still hadn’t managed to calm down after half an hour, still sat up in bed and shaking, he went to find me some of the relaxing tea that had helped before. 

Aronnax returned shortly thereafter with the tea, and with the commander of the Nautilus. I was quite too shaken to react to this visit, and only really registered his presence when he pulled the chair up to sit by my side. Aronnax sat down on the foot of the bed, both men looking terribly concerned. I was given the tea, and drank some without protest. 

“Mademoiselle, it was a terrible sight to see, but those people are with God, there is no more horror for them in this world.” I was staring straight ahead, still seeing the young woman with her child held above her head before my eyes. 

“She can’t have been even my age…” I said quietly, to myself mostly. The men exchanged a glance, and the Captain spoke up.

“I am sorry you had to witness that, miss. The sea holds not only beauty, I’m afraid.” I turned to him, a tear sliding down my cheek.

“Her child never got to live. Never got to grow up.” Something in his expression changed, an immense pain was visible for a second, before turning hard.

“No. There is much injustice in this world. We can only do our best to right some of it in our time.” I looked at him, as always feeling there was some hidden meaning behind his words. His face softened again, and he briefly took my hand. I could see a flash of what might have been jealousy on the professor’s face, immediately followed by shame for this feeling. 

“Try to sleep a little, miss, you are pale as snow.” With these words, and a bow to Aronnax, the Captain left us. I could already feel the effects of the tea, and had time to suspect it may have been made stronger than last time, or perhaps contained an extra ingredient. Soon, I drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

Chapter Text

A couple of days later, and my sleep schedule once again disrupted, I was pacing my cabin. It must have been about nine in the evening, and the others had gone to bed. I’d refused to go back into the lounge since seeing the ship wreck, only venturing as far as the library, but spent the whole time facing the dining room. Now, I was wide awake, and restless. My cabin once again felt claustrophobic, and I longed to lay on the sofa beneath the large crystal window and watch the sea flow by. Exasperated, I decided to overcome my fear, and went to the lounge. I was tentative at first, but could see only water, and the occasional fish outside. The Nautilus was planted firmly on the sea floor, so there was no risk of any more horrors appearing at the moment, and I was soon back on my usual perch. 

December 13th is St. Lucia’s day in Sweden, and I found myself quietly singing some of the many songs associated with the saint. It felt almost wrong hearing those familiar notes while watching the tropical fish swim by outside the window, and I was contemplating my strange existence. I hadn’t noticed anyone coming in to the lounge, being so deep in thought, but when I finished the melody, there was a gentle clapping. I startled, and saw Kumar stood by the wall of nautical instruments. He must have come in to take the usual readings, if at an unusual hour. 

“Kumar! I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you come in.” He tilted his head, looking at me.

“What were you singing, madam?”

I smiled, a bit bashful. I hadn’t meant for anyone to hear.

“Today is December 13th, the day dedicated to the Sicilian St. Lucia. I was singing a song to invoke her presence. It is tradition in Sweden.”

“In Sweden? You are Protestant, no?” he said, with a puzzled look. I had to laugh.

“Technically, yes, but you try living in near constant darkness for three months of the year and not worship the Saint of light!” Now he laughed too, a proper laugh this time, and it was a good, hearty sound. I got the feeling that he was not a gloomy type of person, but light-hearted and warm. He came up closer to me, and spoke in his indistinguishable accent.

“The Captain said you have a beautiful voice. I think we have all been wishing to hear it.” My eyes went wide at this, and I blushed profusely. Captain Nemo had told the crew of my singing? And they wanted to hear me? I wondered how much else he had told them… I had to look away.

“Oh… I’m sure he must have exaggerated, it’s really nothing special…”

“Madam, I must disagree, I have just heard the proof that he was right. Besides, the Captain is not nice enough to exaggerate,” he said with a shrug, then grinned and winked at me. Shocked, I laughed out loud, this was so unexpected. To hear someone who actually knew the Captain speaking of him, even joking about him! Smiling through his heavy mustache, Kumar went over to the bar table, pouring us both a drink. I hardly knew what to think. For the past weeks, I’d struggled to get him to say more than a few words to me, and now here he was, gearing up for a whole evening together? Something was up. Intrigued, I accepted the drink, and expected Kumar to sit down as well, but he stayed standing. Holding up his glass in a toast, he said;

“To St. Lucia!” He then proceeded to down the whole drink, to my astonishment. He looked at me, expectantly, so I shrugged and followed suit. He took my glass, and went to refill it. I was stunned. What was going on?

“I- uh… thank you.” I accepted the second drink, and was not even given the grace period of a toast before we downed this one as well. The same procedure repeating, I had to speak up.

“Kumar, forgive me, what is happening?” I said, slightly dazed. 

“You need five or six of these to sing in front of people, no?” he grinned. At first, I had no idea what he was on about, before it dawned on me. I closed my eyes, and sighed deeply. Nemo had apparently relayed the whole conversation to at least his chief officer, if not the whole crew. Pushing the third glass into my hand, I started protesting.

“No, please, that’s not needed. You already heard me sing!” 

“Me, yes. Very good. The rest of the crew? No.” It dawned on me what was happening.

“Oh… oh no. Absolutely not.” I shook my head violently. Kumar pointed to my drink, and at this point, I did feel I needed it, so down it went. Still, I kept objecting.

“I won’t be doing that, nuh-uh. No thank you.” Grabbing my glass, the burly man went for a fourth round, still grinning.

“Kumar! Stop! It’s not happening!” The alcohol was going to my head now, and I was laughing in disbelief. 

“You will make Marco so sad. He wants nothing else for his birthday,” Kumar said, while pouring the last bit from one of the bottles.

“Marco? Who’s Marco?” Handing me my fourth drink, Kumar finally sat down opposite me.

“One of the crew.” I rolled my eyes and couldn’t help but slur ever so slightly.

“Yeah, thanks, I got that much. Which one is he?” 

“Come and see.” This made me sober up at bit. 

“‘Come and see’?”

“We are all in the mess hall, celebrating right now. Come and see.” I narrowed my eyes at him. Was this some kind of trick? I couldn’t quite think straight anymore, but my heart was beating at this prospect. He’d already admitted there was a mess hall, which was more than we’d been able to determine in the five weeks we’d been aboard. What other secrets might be revealed, were I to come with? And the price I had to pay was to sing in front of the crew… Fuck it, I’d sang in front of way more people than that at karaoke bars, with nothing to gain from it apart from five minutes of fame afterwards. I downed my fourth glass, and held it out to Kumar. 

“One more, then let’s go.” His grin became wider than ever before, and there was a sparkle of true glee in his eyes. I smiled back, shaking my head at the absurdity of the situation. Perhaps I’d soon wake up in my cabin again, having dreamt it all.

Chapter Text

Knocking at the door, Kumar shouted a phrase in Nautilese, and then opened it. A loud cheer greeted me, and despite my inebriation, I couldn’t help but shy away at first. However, I wasn’t given the chance to change my mind, but was ushered into a large room, with four tables, each seating ten. There were a few empty chairs, but I think there must have been about thirty-five men in total in the mess hall. I saw Captain Nemo sat to the far left, watching me tentatively. I didn’t let my eyes linger on him, but looked around at all the faces. I recognised most of them, and they were in fact all looking at me, expectantly, some smiling. My eyes fell to the floor, but I was drunk enough to appreciate the attention, and couldn’t help but smile as well, and giggle a bit. This was truly absurd. Kumar was stood next to me, and made a comment in their strange language. It was met by more cheers, and one man sneered something back, but at this, the Captain shot him an icy look of so much authority that he instantly silenced. Kumar nudged me slightly.

“Go on, madam!” Before I could think it through too much, and give myself stage fright, or realise how embarrassing this was, I simply began. 

“Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday, dear Marco

Happy birthday to you”

The room had been dead silent, but as I finished the verse, erupted into loud roars and thunderous applause. A man who must have been Marco received plenty of backslaps from his comrades, before coming up to me. He took my hand, bowed deeply, and kissed it. 

“Muchas gracias señorita! Maravillosa! I ask, you sing one more?” His deep appreciation for this short verse was endearing, and I smiled at him.

“Oh, of course, I was just getting started!” I answered, liquid confidence flowing through my veins. Some of the men cheered, the ones who spoke English, I assume, before turning to their friends to translate. This was met by more cheers. Somehow, I don’t think I was the most inebriated person in the room. 

A couple of songs later, I had to sit down at a table, and a drink was placed in front of me. I downed that one as well, the Palmata liquor being easy to swallow, and my table mates cheered at this too. I was well popular, it seemed. Kumar had sat down next to me, enjoying another glass of the liquor as well. It seemed it had finally started to have an effect on him, and he turned to me.

“Madam, your singing has livened us all up, even more so than your joke!” At first, I couldn’t think what he meant, but as soon as he’s said this, everyone at the table raised their glasses and said in unison;

“He’s all right!” 

“Ohh..!” I exclaimed, and they all laughed, and me with them. 

“I’ve got another one for you,” I said, conspiratorially. Our table quieted, everyone leaning in a bit. 

“What was the fattest knight at King Arthur’s table called?” The men looked at me questioningly, before I said, smiling;

“Sir Cumferance!” Luckily, it seemed everyone at my table spoke English to some degree, for my joke was met with roaring laughter. Thank God these kinds of jokes were inventive in 1867! Drunk on the liquor and high on the attention, I couldn’t help but continue. 

“What was the Jewish knight at King Arthur’s table called?” No one answered this time either, but they looked at me giddily.

“Sir Cumcision!” For a second, it was quiet, and I worried I’d gone too far, before deafening howls erupted. My table mates looked at each other, then at me, all while laughing, and I received some backslaps myself. I laughed with them, relieved to have been so readily accepted, finally. 

“We’ll make a sailor of you yet, I think, Madam!” Kumar grinned, wiping a tear from his eye. Suddenly, they all quieted, and straightened up. I furrowed my brow. ‘What?’

“Enjoying the company, miss?” I heard, right behind me. I straightened up too, and turned around slowly. I quickly glanced at the Captain, before looking away.

“Very much, sir. Thank you for inviting me.” 

“Don’t thank me, thank Marco, it’s his birthday,” he said, calm as ever. I looked around, and spotted Marco at another table. I lifted my glass to him, someone had already refilled it, and he lifted his back, grinning. I saw him say something to his seatmate, who then shouted at me;

“Another song, miss!” I smiled.

“Already? Very well.” Since my crude joke had been met with such appreciation, I thought I could go bolder with the next song choice. 

“A low bar is the one bar I know

And slow is as fast as I go

My lofty pursuits

Are all low-hanging fruits

And even then I've got no wins to show

A low bar is the one bar I've set

And still I haven't reached it yet

But I would be lying

If I said I'd been trying

I'd rather just drink and forget

Well, I know you know that I know you're done

Still I've got nothing to say

I ain't doing much learning

From all the bridges I'm burning

My bad habits are all here to stay

Well, I see you need someone who ain't me

To show all how to get up and go

I ain't much for showing

And lord knows I ain't going

As long as the neon still glows”

Each statement in the song was met with cheer and lifted glasses, which had to be topped up both once and twice. The English speakers were laughing at the self-depreciating lines, and whole room was loud and cheerful. Once I’d finished, I bowed to my audience, who clapped and whistled. The Captain, who’d taken a seat directly behind me at the next table, leaned over.

“What’s ‘neon’?” I stiffened at this. Shit. I hadn’t realised this song contained any modern elements. I was too drunk to think of a good lie, so I feigned ignorance.

“Oh, I- uh, I don’t know. Something that glows.” I smiled awkwardly, and luckily, the Captain didn’t push it further. I hurried to change the subject.

“So, how old is Marco?” Looking at me intently, Nemo didn’t answer for a few seconds, but then relaxed.

“He’s turning thirty, or we wouldn’t put on quite such a show.” 

“Ah, I see…” Only two years older than me, then. It struck me that I had no idea how old the Captain was. It seemed he was almost too otherworldly for such trivial things as age, but now I was curious.

“Say, Captain, when is your thirtieth birthday?” I asked, innocently. I hoped looking young was considered a compliment in the 1860s too. The Captain gave me a cunning smile, but of course, did not answer. He really was quite close. If I hadn’t been so drunk, I would have had to look away, but now, I think I just gawked. 

“When’s yours?” he countered, in his deep voice. 

"February 9th, 2027,” I answered, looking into his eyes, mesmerised. I didn’t realise what I’d said until his smile turned into a grin. 

“Quite a while to go, then, miss. You’re much younger than I thought.” Naturally, he thought I’d made a snarky comment, rather than reveal the greatest secret of my existence. I’d probably have major anxiety over it tomorrow, but for now, I brushed it off with a smile.

“How old did you think I was?” He furrowed his brows ever so slightly.

“I must admit, miss, it’s hard to say. You look about twenty, but you speak as though you were older than that.”

“How much older?” I said, with a sly grin. Thank God for retinol. 

“Somewhere between fifty or sixty, at least,” he said, with a straight face. My jaw dropped. The insolence! Laughing, I shook my head. He was laughing too. 

“You turn around and stop bothering me. I’ll be speaking with my own table from now on, thank you very much!” I said, still grinning. He smiled, and there was a definite fondness in his eyes, which made my heart flutter. I had to look away, and noticed my seatmates had quieted, and were observing the interaction. Embarrassed, I turned around for my glass. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kumar, he was grinning at the Captain, then shot a meaning glance at me. When I looked over my shoulder, Nemo turned around, away from us, and soon after retired for the night.

Chapter Text

As the evening went on, more people dropped off to bed, one by one, until there was less than half of us left. We’d all crowded around one of the tables at this point, some sharing seats, others perched on top of the other tables, looking over our heads. The rowdiness from before had died down, and we were now listening to one of the crew, a large, muscular fellow who looked to be about forty, who was telling a story. He was using Nautliese, naturally, so I could not follow it, but was still quite content while smoking one of the seaweed cigars, which had been brought out for us. Kumar, still sat next to me, would briefly summarise what he was saying. It was a story of how the man, Javier, had gone out with his three older brothers, to hunt a jaguar which had been terrorising their village. He’d only been about fifteen, and the hunt had almost ended badly. He pulled his shirt off and turned around, to show us four parallel scars going from his shoulder, and halfway down across his back. They were raised, and stood out in pale contrast to his tan skin. I was watching them with wide eyes, imagining how close to death he must have been, and thought it was a miracle he had survived wounds like that before modern medicine. Some of the men groaned, and seemed to protest. It was clearly not the first time they’d heard the story, but Javier just smiled, and winked at me. I blushed a little, but Kumar said something in a stern tone I’d not heard him use before, and Javier held up his hands in a disarming gesture. The men laughed, and had I not been so dazed from the alcohol and nicotine running through my blood, I might have felt self-conscious over this. Thinking of the state I was in, and with my track record of making bad decisions when drunk, I decided it was perhaps time I retired as well. I stood up, holding onto the table to keep my balance.

“Gentlemen, I want to extend my sincerest gratitude for inviting me this evening. It’s been a pleasure.” The announcement of my departure was met with objections, but Kumar stood up as well, and silencing the room. Despite his jovial disposition, he clearly held a great deal of authority, perhaps as much as the Captain, but I could not say for sure. Marco, now well into what must have been his tenth or so drink since my arrival, still dared to speak up, perhaps on the account of it being his party. 

“Señorita, one more canción for Marco, por favor?” he slurred, and gave me his best attempt at puppy dog eyes. Kumar must have given him a fierce look, but he was too far gone to notice. I couldn’t help but smile, but shook my head.

“Another time, amigo.” I bent over the table, and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Feliz cumpleaños!” 

Now it was Marco’s turn to blush, and the men cheered and whistled. Kumar grabbed my arm, and I was made to leave to a chorus of thank yous and goodnights. Back in the gangway, I turned to him.

“Kumar, it’s alright if you want to stay, I’m sure I’ll find my way back!” Looking around, I realised I had no idea what part of the ship I was in.

“... Eventually.”

“The Captain has tasked me with looking after you, all night. It was the condition for you being invited.” I looked at him, surprised, but he started leading me along the gangway. I don’t know why the thought hadn’t struck me before, perhaps it was due to the copious amounts of alcohol imbibed, but I realised it hadn’t been a coincidence Kumar had found me in the lounge and invited me. Thinking back, he had said Marco’s only birthday wish had been to hear me sing, but I’d thought he was joking.

“Oh. And why you? If it was Marco who wanted me there?” Kumar smiled, and fondly put a hand on my shoulder. 

“Madam, we all wanted you there, but I was the one who insisted to the Captain we invite you.” I furrowed my brows. So Captain Nemo hadn’t wanted me there? And why not? He’d been warm and even joked with me while in the mess hall. I huffed.

“Well, clearly not all of you, if the Captain had to task someone with making sure I behaved,” I said indignantly. Kumar laughed at me. ‘Excuse me?’, I thought angrily, but before I had time to protest, he said;

“Madam, that is not what he meant, and I do not think the Captain would have stayed more than five minutes, had you not been there!” Looking quite proud of himself, he stated;

“Therefore, my plan worked perfectly, and I was more than happy to be responsible for you.” I stared at him in absolute wonderment. Had my senses been more keen in that moment, I might have asked why I needed looking after, but all other thoughts were overshadowed by this one; the Captain had stayed, for me ? No, for my singing, he must have meant, and this explanation was somehow more humble than the alternative. I could justify it by thinking that none of the men onboard had heard a woman sing for several years, and that beggars couldn't be choosers. That’s why the Captain had stayed, and that’s why the crew had been so incredibly welcoming. This being resolved, another thought did manage to take form in my muddled brain.

“Kumar, I take it you know the Captain very well then, no?” We had just reached my cabin, and stopped outside the door. The chief officer gave me a discerning look, and seemed to debate whether or not he was able to share this information with me. I tried my best to look innocent, and his face was once again lit up by his jovial smile. 

“Madam, Da- the Captain is my oldest friend, and I know him better than anyone onboard!” With this, Kumar bid me good night, and I thanked him sincerely for insisting that I be invited, and taking me under his wing. I truly had had the most amazing night, and my initial mission of finding out more information about the crew was forgotten, in favour of finding genuine friendship with them. 

Chapter Text

Waking the next day, I was feeling the way I deserved to, as we say in Sweden. I hadn’t moved by the time Oskar came in with my breakfast, and at this point, he was no longer shocked when finding me in bed. I’d seen him in the mess hall last night, but he’d left quite early. He took one look at me, and actually gave a half-smile. Sadistic bastard. 

“God morgon,” (“Good morning”) he said, which had become our usual routine, before he would bow, and leave me. Today, he seemed a little more chatty. Leaning against the door frame, he crossed his arms.

“Allt väl?” (“All good?”) he grinned. I groaned in reply.

“Nej.” (“No.”) He actually chuckled at this. Well, at least one of us wasn’t hung over. 

“Ät lite frukost, frun, så mår ni bättre.” (“Have some breakfast, madam, you’ll feel better.”) With these words, more than I’d heard him say since that first day we spoke, he bowed, and left me with a smile still on his face. So, so glad I could brighten someone’s day with my misery. After giving myself a mental pep talk, since I knew he was right, I managed to shuffle over to the desk. Lifting the silver cover, I found a plate of eggs on seaweed bread. I let out a sigh. ‘Thank God!’ I thought, ‘I don’t think I could stomach any fish whatsoever right now’. I didn’t question where the eggs came from, since I was so grateful to have been served one of the best hangover cures in existence. 

Later, I was in fact feeling better, and decided to take some fresh air, another proven remedy. Climbing up on the platform, I was hoping to maybe find Aronnax there. I could not wait to tell him all about last night. Or at least most of it. He was not on the platform, but it was not deserted. I stopped in my tracks when I saw Captain Nemo standing by the beacon housing. He’d heard me, of course, nothing seemed to escape that man, and he turned around.

“Good day, Captain!” I hastened to say, slightly taken by surprise. All at once, the hangxiety from last night hit me. Why the hell had I been singing and making dick jokes with the crew, and gotten dangerously close to fully flirting with the Captain?! I could feel myself blushing, and had to look away. 

“Good day, miss,” he replied, eyeing me. In my anxious state, I tried to come up with something to say, and my brain kindly provided me with the following:

“Excellent boiled eggs this morning, sir!” I immediately wanted to slap myself. ‘Excellent boiled eggs’?! Yikes. The comment seemed however to amuse the Captain, for he smiled, and gave a sarcastic;

“Oh? And what exactly makes a boiled egg ‘excellent’, in your humble opinion?” I decided to stubbornly stick with my comment, and continued defiantly:

“Well, for starters they need to be fresh, of course. Secondly, they should be iced right before the yolk fully sets, as to retain the most flavour. I truly admire your cook his intuition, sir, would you be so kind as to give him my compliments?” Captain Nemo merely continued to smile sarcastically, and looked almost sinister at that. He knew something was amiss. I had no choice but to blabber on.

“Thirdly, although this is my personal preference, they ought to be well seasoned. Salt, of course, we have in abundance, but they might benefit greatly from some other spices as… well, such as black pepper.” He still hadn’t said anything, and I glanced over to him. He no longer looked amused, his smile was gone, and had been replaced by a disapproving expression. I panicked, and found myself speaking even faster, even though I wanted to shut the hell up.

“Or some chili sauce! Nice and spicy…” He interrupted me then.

“Do you think some ‘excellent boiled eggs’ justify the way in which the people harvesting these spices are treated?” His tone was not harsh, but I seemed to have hit a nerve somehow. My heart sank. He was right of course, and I conceded immediately. 

“... Probably not, sir, no.” Employing my usual tactic of a disarming joke, I continued.

“In fact, thinking about it, just salt is preferable, actually. It doesn’t overpower the flavour like some other spices do.” The Captain had regained his usual calm expression, and seemed to almost regret reprimanding me, for he came over and said, in a much kinder tone;

“I will let Adham know he makes excellent boiled eggs, miss.” His facial expression was warm, and I breathed out, relieved I had not greatly offended him with my carelessness. I had even been given another name of the crew. Encouraged by this, I ventured to ask carefully;

“Was Adham there… last night? I’m afraid I did not catch that many names.” For some reason, it felt risky bringing up the party, as if it was something that should not be talked about sober, in the fresh air and daylight. But there had been nothing untoward going on, had there? After a brief pause in which he studied me intently, the Captain replied;

“He was. He greatly enjoyed the evening… as did I.” My breath hitched at this. I knew there was hidden meaning behind his words, and almost, almost dared think I knew what this time, after what Kumar had said last night. For a few moments, Captain Nemo and I simply looked at one another, and holding his gaze, I felt again that there was just a sliver of hope that he might… My thoughts were interrupted when a dozen crewmembers came up on the platform to lay the nets for the night. I recognized all of them, but only knew Javier’s name. They all nodded to us, some gave me a slight smile. Marco was not among them, perhaps he had been given the day off to recover.

Chapter Text

The moment with Captain Nemo was broken, he was now looking out to sea, but said politely;

“I trust you had an enjoyable evening as well, miss? I must thank you, on behalf of the crew. It has been long since we had the pleasure of hearing singing onboard.” I again had the feeling that there was more to his words, and still studying him, I boldly asked;

“How long, sir?” If he was surprised at me daring such a question, he did not show it. Still looking over the waters, Nemo actually replied.

“Over two years now, since we lost Elijah.” The Captain’s eyes glassed over, saying this, but he still continued.

“He was a phenomenal vocalist. He played the organ too, and other instruments. We still have his guitar, although, no one has yet been persuaded to pick it up.” I felt honoured that Captain Nemo was comfortable sharing so much information with me, and hoped that perhaps last night had not been a fluke, but a turning point in my stay on board the Nautilus . Maybe I had finally been deemed worthy of knowing, and the crew would no longer avoid and exclude me. A voice in the back of my head told me to be wary, that I did not know what secrets they were keeping, only that the Captain did not want me ‘complicit’. Complicit to what, exactly? I also remembered the fact that nothing had changed for my companions, and despite the obvious friendship between Professor Aronnax and the Captain, he had not been invited last night. Then again, I supposed technically it wasn’t the Captain that had invited me either. Deciding not to push my luck further at the moment, and to let Nemo know he could tell me of their past without me probing further, I simply answered him;

“I’m very sorry, Captain. I should have liked to hear him.”

“Yes, I’m sure your voices would have sounded wonderful together. Or he might have accompanied you on the organ.” I was a little confused at this. 

“Could you not accompany me, if you should like to hear it? I believe I saw the libretto for Faust in the lounge. My Marguerite isn’t half bad, if I may say so.” I smiled tentatively, and he gave me a sad smile back. 

“I do not doubt it, miss, but I could not accompany you. The sheet music was all Elijah’s.” I frowned at this. 

“You do not read sheet music, sir?” For some reason I did not believe this to be the case, in my mind there was nothing this man couldn’t do. 

“I can, but I don’t.” Just as we’d taken a step forward, it was time to take two back, as always. I should have quit while I was ahead. Then something occurred to me. 

“You weren’t using sheet music… that night? When I heard you play?” I hoped he would not be offended at me bringing up that intimate moment, but then remembered he’d apparently given a detailed account of it to the crew, and felt I had the right to do so.

“No, I was playing freely, as I always do.” My eyes widened, my mouth agape.

“You were composing that music in the moment ? Sir, it is one of the most beautiful pieces I have ever heard!”

“Thank you, miss. Composing has always come naturally to me.” He seemed so forlorn today, and I longed for the relaxed, playful version of him I’d met yesterday. 

“Captain..?” I said, in a questioning tone, looking up at him.

“Yes?”

“Pray tell, do you remember our first meal together aboard the Nautilus ?”

“I do.”

“And, do you by any chance remember me admonishing the professor for his modesty?”

He looked slightly perplexed at this, but replied;

“I do, yes.”

I looked away towards the horizon before continuing.

“You, sir, do not suffer from the same affliction.”

He was quiet for a moment, and I was worried my attempt at a joke had gone terribly wrong, but then he suddenly burst into a laugh, and I felt my insides warming. I turned to him with what must have been a look of absolute wonder, the difference in him was like night and day. He looked back at me with a warm smile that reached his previously somber eyes, and I almost felt my heart stop. He was so beautiful. Catching myself, I took a deep breath in and had to look away. At that, I noticed the crew all looking at us in what might have been amazement, and one of them speaking to the others before they all started laughing. I noticed several warm, appreciative glances at me. 

“Did he… did he just translate my joke?” I asked Captain Nemo in astonishment. He was looking at his crew with a fond smile.

“It’s been a rare occasion, them hearing their Captain laugh, I’m afraid,” he said, with a certain tone of regret in his voice. 

“Then… I shall endeavour to rectify this, to the best of my ability,” I said boldly, before daring a shy glance at the man next to me. What I didn’t say, and what I hoped my face didn’t betray to his keen perception, was how happy I would be to devote my life to making him smile. He turned to me, and in a good-natured voice said;

“Oh? You believe yourself capable of this?”

Emboldened by the crew’s reaction and his merry tone, I straightened and smiled.

“When it comes to my wit and sense of humour, sir, neither I am burdened by the professor’s affliction!”

Chapter Text

Having so much to tell the professor, I felt it could not wait another day, so I brought my dinner tray over to his cabin as soon as it had been delivered to mine. He looked surprised at first, but was immediately intrigued when he saw my excited expression. We had our dinners together, although I admit it took me twice as long, since I was busy retelling everything that had happened over the last twenty-four hours. Almost everything, anyway. I knew I had made the right decision to leave out the most intimate details when I saw how hurt he was at thinking Captain Nemo had invited me but not him. I hastened to assure him that it was Kumar, not the Captain, who had done so, and on behalf of my singing, rather than my personality. Aronnax looked relieved, but then interjected.

“But mademoiselle, I did not know of this, I have never heard you sing! How did the chief officer know?” I managed to keep a straight face, and simply worked around the truth to give him an answer.

“He came in to the lounge to take some readings, I did not notice him, and he heard me! I do not like to sing in front of people, really, but I could not resist the invitation.” I omitted the fact that I had been persuaded to down five glasses of Palmata liquor before accompanying him. I relayed the evening spent in the mess hall, focusing mainly on what I had learnt of the crew, rather than specific conversations. 

“So you see, monsieur, that the crew come from all over the world, not just Europe. Javier must be from South America, if he grew up where there are jaguars, and Kumar is an Indian name, I believe.” He could not refute the evidence laid out, and I ventured to put forward a theory, which had been nagging at the back of my mind since last night.

“If Kumar is indeed Indian, and the Captain is his oldest friend, do you think the Captain might be as well?” However, this was not much to go on, we concluded, as Kumar might have simply meant he was his oldest friend onboard , or perhaps they had met at school, in Europe. Kumar was clearly a highly educated man as well, since the Captain consulted him on everything, and relied on him as his second in command of his beloved Nautilus . Giving up our quest for the moment, I continued on to tell Aronnax of today’s meeting with the Captain. He was intrigued to hear the cook’s name, Adham, and to hear of the lost crew mate, Elijah. When I retold my joke of the professor's modesty, he blushed a bit, and looked every bit a schoolboy. I almost had to stop myself from pinching his cheeks. 

As always, after Pierre told me a little of the observations he’d made in the last couple of days, our conversation soon reverted back to the Captain. My friend shyly asked what he’d been like last night, and as I did not want to hurt his feelings, said that he’d been in a good mood, but that I had not spoken to him much. He still looked morose at having missed this special occasion, so I vowed to him that I would not accept another invite unless it was extended to him as well.

“Perhaps you’ll need to provide some form of entertainment as well though… Are you a good dancer, professor? The cancan is a Parisian specialty, is it not?” He looked at me wide-eyed, before bursting out laughing. I laughed with him, content I’d managed to brighten his gloomy countenance. I was two for two, so far today. Our laughter must have drowned out the sound of the Captain entering his stateroom next door, for suddenly there was a knock on the door in between the rooms, and we froze.

“Uh, entrez!” The professor managed, after a moment, and arose. Captain Nemo opened the door, perhaps a little less confidently than I would have expected.

“Good evening, professor. Miss Eleonora, I thought that must be you. Have you not retired from your duties for the night?” I looked at him, confused. He smiled slightly.

“It seems you have made it your mission to cheer up everyone on board, at this point.”

“Oh…” I smiled, looking down. “I’m afraid the professor was quite upset to have missed the party last night, he was in dire need of my services,” I said, reprimandingly. The professor gave me an indignant look, but I paid him no mind. I had truly wished he’d been there, and had the invitation not been sprung on me so unexpectedly, I would have insisted on it last night. The Captain, ever in control of himself, turned to the professor.

“A regretful oversight, sir. Had I taken part in the inviting, it would not have occurred.” He could not have given the professor a more reassuring answer, and Aronnax seemed almost flustered. I wondered if the Captain was immune to his youthful charm in these moments, it was difficult to tell with this stoic individual. I knew he liked him a great deal, and his words had been sincere. Deeper down, I wondered if this man, who’d renounced all morals of ‘civilised society’, by his own account, might possibly return the professor’s affection. I would not think it impossible. 

"Capitaine, I take no offence, I understand the invitation to mademoiselle was most spontaneous.” The Captain showed no sign that would betray my slight omission of the truth on this subject, but I still hastened to interject.

“But Captain, we must indeed make sure the professor is in attendance for your next get-together, for he has promised to teach us all the cancan!” The professor turned completely red at this, and started to desperately refute my claim, before the Captain interrupted him with a thunderous laugh. Both me and Aronnax were quite startled at this, I think, but had to join in. It filled me with warmth, being able to laugh together with these men who were both so dear to me. Eventually, the Captain said, smiling;

“Miss, I must insist you cease your efforts for the night, for I am retiring, and would be sorry to miss out on a single one of your witticisms.” I smiled back.

“I cannot give any such promise, sir, for it is the equivalent of asking me to cease breathing!” He looked at me with so much fondness that I almost lost my composure.

“Very well, Eleonora, I would never put forward such an unreasonable request. However, may I ask that the affair is taken elsewhere, so as to let me rest in peace?” I tried not to think about him sleeping, wearing only the billowy shirt, or perhaps not even that… Christ, how did the professor manage to get any rest, with only a wall between them?! I must give him credit. I, for one, was happy that my cabin was quite removed from the Captain’s. Managing a reply, I smiled softly.

“A much more reasonable request, Captain. But it is late, and I should think the professor needs his rest as well.” Rising, I bid them both good night, and went back to my room, still with a warm feeling in my heart.

Chapter Text

The next couple of weeks went by in their usual manner. I did not see more of either the Captain or his crew than normally, but when I did meet any of them, we now exchanged at least a polite nod and smile. It wasn’t much, but great progress from the first month. 

On the evening of December 24th, the day we celebrate Christmas in Sweden, I was sat alone in the lounge. With an unusual twinge of homesickness, I was feeling quite lonely, and debated going to find Pierre for some company. Before I could make my mind up, a different companion appeared. Ned Land stepped into the lounge, with heavy footsteps, but seemed not to see me. 

“Good evening, mr Land,” I said carefully. He startled, but relaxed when he saw me.

“Oh, is that what you call it?”

I laughed bitterly.

“No, not really, I suppose.” He looked at me questioningly. It wasn’t usual for me to share in his laments, and it peaked his interest.

“You’re having a hard time as well?”

“Just… today I think,” I answered honestly. “It being Christmas eve and all.”

I gestured for Ned to take a seat next to me, and he sat down heavily.

“Yup, can’t say it’s not making things worse for me as well. What a disgrace, the evening before Jesus’s birth, and you can’t even toast the man.” I laughed again, sincerely this time. But then a thought struck me.

“And who says we can’t?” I got up and went over to the small side table functioning as a bar. Ned looked at me, confused, while I poured us two glasses of water and mixed with the Palmata liquor. Handing him one, I held mine up. 

“To Jesus Christ!” I declared solemnly, and then took a big gulp. Ned followed my example, and looked at me in wonder.

“That’s what that is? And I never knew! I thought the Captain was one of those puritans for sure.” 

“Does that mean you like him a bit better now?” I smiled.

“I like his liquor,” the Canadian said, and downed the rest of his glass. Shrugging, I followed suit, and went to refill the glasses. Getting a better idea, I went and got the bottles instead. 

Sometime, and many toasts later, the following conversation took place. 

“You know what would go great with this Palmata stuff?” Ned was slurring a bit now.

“Yeah. Literally anything not from the sea!” I answered dryly, and downed my fourth or fifth glass. Ned’s laugh bellowed in my ears.

“Right you are! I’d eat grass at this point as long as it was from land!”

“Grass? I’d be happy for some grass, but would even settle for a piece of wood!” We laughed together. Drying a tear from his eye, Ned sombered. 

“Of course, if we were home, we wouldn’t need to settle for wood, or even grass! We’d be eating a proper Christmas dinner, with a big roast turkey.”

“Turkey? No, no, a glazed gammon joint, with mustard and malt bread!” 

A lively discussion on what a proper Christmas dinner ought to consist of then took place, but in the end we agreed that there was no reason to be frugal, we should have the whole spread! We then felt the need to honour this grand idea with a Christmas song, which turned into two or three more, mostly because we couldn’t remember any full one. Feeling the liquor going to my head, I laid down on the sofa and stared up at the ceiling. Ned had calmed down as well, and now said sadly;

”My sister makes the best turkey you’ve ever had, ma’am. And bakes bread and cakes for weeks before Christmas every year. My little niece and nephews have to be told off so they don’t eat them all beforehand. I’d always bring them presents from my travels. I wonder if they’re celebrating the same as always, this year…” 

”Probably not, since you’re dead,” I said, in cruel honesty. Ned was silent for a moment, before quietly saying;

”You’re right, we are dead, aren’t we?”

”Speak for yourself, I’m not even born yet!”

”What are you on about? Had too much already?” He said, mockingly. For a second, I seriously considered telling him the truth, but I wasn’t drunk enough to be that stupid. I changed the subject.

”What do you miss the most?” I’d bundled up some discarded sketch of mine from earlier, and was throwing it up in the air before catching it. When Ned didn’t immediately answer, I sat up on my elbows and looked at him with a raised eyebrow. ”The women?”

He shrugged. 

”Maybe. Or steak.” I laughed. It was such a relief to once again talk to an ordinary human man, not having to watch my every step. 

”And you?” I thought for a moment, then fell back down on the sofa.

”A good wine. Or fresh fruit. Or chocolate .” I said dreamily. “And steak.”

Ned laughed as well, but then turned serious again. 

“What do you see in that Nemo? You’re nothing like him, pompous and thinks he’s better than everyone..”

“Where do you get that notion? Of course I think I’m better than everyone!” Ned did laugh, despite himself, but wouldn’t leave it alone. 

“You really don’t. You talk to me as if we were equals, and you don’t think I’m crude or unsophisticated. Hell, some of your jokes almost make me blush, and I’m a sailor!” Now it was my turn to laugh. It was true, I had made some filthy jokes. 

“But Ned, why would you say we’re not equals?”

“Ma’am, all due respect, I know a lady when I see one.” I looked up at him again.

“I’m really not though. My parents both worked.”

“Then how do you know all that stuff, how to speak and act, and I’ve heard what you speak of with the professor and the Captain! You’re an educated woman.” ‘Well you see Ned, I used to watch a lot of period dramas and now I just pretend I’m in one. Also I was in school for like a decade and a half, it’s mandatory in the 2000s’. Hmm, maybe not. 

“I told you, my father was also a professor. He taught me everything.” 

“If you say so, ma’am.” We were silent for a moment, both helping ourselves to another glass, but then the Canadian continued.

“If I’d known you really weren’t a lady, perhaps I’d have taken you up on that offer.” I was confused. 

“What offer?”

“Oh, you know, when you said you’d repay me for saving your life…” I stared at him, my mouth open, then threw a pillow at his face.

“Ned! I thought we were friends!” Still, I couldn’t hold back a smile. Damn those blue eyes, and his sailor’s charm. He was smiling too, and held up his hands in a disarming gesture.

“Just saying, not that much fun to be had on board!” He was right, and I was pretty drunk. And he was tall, and muscular, and his blonde hair had gotten a bit longer, almost hanging down to those blue eyes… Another pair of eyes flashed in my mind, dark, penetrating my soul, and I almost choked. Remembering myself, I shook my head. 

”I wouldn’t want your hand to get jealous of me,” I said with a grin. Laughing, Ned conceded.

”Alright, worth a shot.” Getting up, but almost tripping, he went to leave. Before doing so, he put a hand on my shoulder. 

”Anyway, it’s victory enough knowing that you considered it.” I looked down, blushing profusely. Shit. So much for subtlety. He laughed again, and left me.

Chapter Text

In the days between Christmas and New Years, we were sailing through the tropical seas west of Australia, and every moment brought new wonders for us to study. I had never before been anywhere like this, and so different were the colourful, warms waters to the North sea of my childhood that I felt I was on another planet. I had trouble focusing on conversations, and my friends would often have to repeat themselves when talking to me, as I stared out the crystal windows in the lounge. I felt even more alien being on this part of the globe, than I did in this different age to the one I was born in. The Captain had been absent for many days now, and I rarely saw any of the crew. Oskar seemed to have cooled off again, and had even perfected delivering my breakfast without waking me, so that some days I did not see him at all. Kumar did always speak to me kindly, but briefly, when we saw him on the platform. I had not seen anyone else whose name I knew. My troubles sleeping persisted, and I would still often spend time alone at night. In the late evening of December 26th, we were laying still on the surface, and I felt I could do with some fresh air. Leaving the lounge, I walked quietly through the abandoned ship to the steps leading up to the platform. The night was black, the moon new, and as I left the dim light coming from the hatch, at first I could see nothing. Then slowly, one by one, stars appeared in the sky. I blinked, and sank to my knees. Soon, I could see the milky way above, and a few shooting stars. I laid down on my back, breathing in the warm air, and thought of how I would not see any satellites pass by overhead, as I would have been able to on our island. In my time. The sea was completely still, and soon, I saw the stars reflecting in the calm waters, so that the night sky was all around me, above as below. In those still evenings of late summer back home, I would go down to the dock to experience this very thing. The little islands around would appear as black masses in the myriad of stars, but here, the view was unbroken, and the Nautilus turned into a space ship, travelling through the galaxy. It was unearthly, and mesmerising. Back home, those August nights would bring with them another miraculous phenomenon. Phosphorescent algae, mareld . If you stirred the water with a stick, it looked like you were waving a magic wand, with glowing lights swirling around it. If you were brave enough (or drunk enough), you could go for a swim in the black night, and the lights would envelope you, lighting up your body from underneath the water’s surface. It is the closest to a living dream you can ever come. I missed it. I missed my home. I felt tears roll down my cheeks. Where was I? Was any of this real? Or was I dreaming? And if I was, was it a dream, or a nightmare? Shaking off these morbid thoughts, I rolled over on my stomach, and reached over the edge to splash some water on my face. Touching the surface, I instantly withdrew my hands, as if I’d been burnt. The water had lit up, as if by magic. The algae! They were here as well! In this strange place, halfway around the world, a hundred and thirty years before I was born, here they were! I started sobbing. I felt as if I was being greeted by old friends. I touched the water again, and saw the light swirl around my fingers. It was warm, and welcoming. Without thinking, I quickly undressed, and slipped into the sea. Feeling the tropical waters envelope me was like a warm hug, and the phosphorescent lights danced all around my naked body. I danced with them, swimming and floating freely. I was filled with calm and bliss. Breathing deeply, I drifted among the stars, while lit up from beneath. I’d never felt so free in my life, and deep content made all anxiety slip away.

I don’t know how long I’d been moving through this element of twinkling lights, when I suddenly felt a presence near me. I looked around, and saw a large shape moving through the water towards me. Brightly lit up by the phosphorescence, a whale shark glided through the sea. Or swam through the stars, I felt unsure, so serene and dazed was I. Only a few meters away from me, I watched its ten meter long body slowly pass by. I felt sure now, that if I was dreaming, it was no nightmare. Only gratitude for getting to experience this magical world filled me. I looked on as it swam away, and then spun around slowly, facing the Nautilus . A dark shape on the platform hid the stars near the horizon. In my state of absolute tranquility, nothing could have startled me, so I only stopped and watched him. He was watching me in return. I could not see his face, but I knew who it was. Before I could form any thought on if I should address the Captain, he disappeared down the hatch.

Chapter Text

It was almost midday when I stepped into the lounge. The professor was there, and happily greeted me. He told me that he’d seen the Captain that morning. I stiffened. I’d gone straight back to my cabin last night, terrified to meet Captain Nemo, not knowing what I should make of our encounter. Perhaps he’d not been aware I’d gone up to the platform, and if that was the case, he must have been truly startled to find me swimming naked among the glowing lights. Although the alternative, that he had known, and still come up, was perhaps even more unsettling. The implications of that second option were more than I was ready to process. I knew my feelings, and most of the time I was at peace with the fact that I should have to content myself with always just admiring the man from afar. What I was not ready for, was if my feelings were truly returned. I had no doubts that the Captain did like me, same as he liked the professor, but he was so stoic, so distant, that the prospect of him falling in love seemed impossible. Whatever had happened to him, the events which had made him renounce all of humanity, also seemed to have made him rid himself of any feelings whatsoever. I tried to take after his usual, calm demeanour when I asked the professor in a casual tone;

“Oh, did you? And how did he seem?” I did not for an instant think the Captain would have disclosed our encounter last night to Aronnax. Indeed he had made no mention of it, but had only shown the professor his finds from off the island of Vanikoro. I let the professor relay the whole interaction to me, and while it was certainly fascinating, I could not focus properly. Only the last words of their interaction broke through the myriad of thoughts cluttering my mind. Hearing that the Captain had spoken of his and his comrades’ deaths with such excitement made my heart sink. I had had no reason to worry, for whoever he had once been, he was now No one, already dead, as he said himself, and any love he still felt was for the sea alone. 

Several more days passed without me meeting the Captain. Was he avoiding me? Perhaps he was dreading our next encounter as much as I was. If I knew him at all though, he would make no mention of it, but act as serene and restrained as always. I think what made his behavior all the more painful, was the glimpses I’d seen of his true nature. Joy, sorrow, fear, every emotion made his features come alive, and he was no longer the perfect marble statue we most often saw. Despite dreading meeting him, I still longed to see his face, and not just in my mind, where he occupied most every waking (and unconscious) moment. Being away from him felt like not seeing the sun for days, and the Nautilus’s corridors turned into the prison they effectively were. Trying to shake the claustrophobic feeling, I resolved to find some distraction. The most fun I’d had so far aboard the ship was the party three weeks ago. Of course, the natural wonders were distraction beyond what anyone could wish for, but I longed for human companionship. In my gloomy state, it was the only thing that would do to disperse the melancholy. Today was December 30th, and I wondered if there would be some kind of New Years celebration on board. I wouldn’t have guessed so, but then again the birthday party had been a massive surprise too. Putting my hopes to this, I went to find someone, anyone , that I might ask. 

The trouble was, I did not know where to start. I had tried to recall how to get to the mess hall, but being so inebriated both there and back, I had just followed along with Kumar, not paying attention to where we went. Cursing myself for being a useless spy, I simply wandered the gangways, listening intently for any voices. I did not dare open any doors we had not been shown during our tour with Captain Nemo, and we were sailing underwater, so there was no going up on the platform and hoping to run into someone there. After walking along every known area of the Nautilus, I had still not seen or heard a single soul. I sighed in defeat, feeling even more despondent than before. I was just about to turn back to the lounge, when I heard a door open behind me. Turning around, I was greeted by the good-humoured face of Kumar. Thank God! My face must have lit up, and he looked quite surprised as I exclaimed in perfect glee;

“Kumar! Oh, I am so happy to see you!” Perplexed, he returned my smile, and said in confusion;

“Madam, the pleasure is mine! What can I do for you?” 

“Well, you see, the thought struck me that tomorrow is New Years Eve, and so I wondered if perhaps there is a celebration planned?” He laughed at my cheeky tone, or perhaps at my genuinely hopeful expression.

“Ah, I see we have not scared you off with our previous jubilee. I am sorry to disappoint, but there is nothing planned.” I must have looked as though he’d dumped a bucket of water over my head, and he chuckled compassionately. 

“Madam, it is barely three weeks since we last feasted! We have our mission to think of, first and foremost.” I frowned. 

“Seeing as I am not privy to the mission, it is not what’s first and foremost to me!” Still smiling, he rolled his eyes, but then a thought seemed to interrupt him. Grinning widely, he said conspiratorially;

“Madam, I know why you are so desperate for the next occasion.” I looked at him, my eyebrow raised.

“I imagine you are eager to see us all learn the cancan.”

Chapter Text

Processing this comment for a moment, I then burst out laughing. It was a brief respite, before I realised what this meant, and my joy turned to ice in my stomach. Kumar, watching me, smiled softly. Trying to act casual, I said in an offhanded sort of way;

“Tell me, sir, does the Captain share all my jokes with the crew?” Still watching me intently, Kumar answered;

“Your jokes, yes. The rest, with me only.” My eyes widened. The Captain wouldn't have told him of the other night, would he?

“Th- the rest, sir?” Kumar’s facial expression gave me my answer, but he did not reply. So he knew. I was desperate to ask what exactly had been said, but was too humiliated to put forward any question. I was dumbfounded. In his great kindness, Kumar smoothed it over by continuing as if nothing had happened.

“The crew are all very fond of your jokes, madam, and I’m sure the Captain feels it would be cruel to deprive them of hearing them.” Shrugging, I looked down, and said in a bitter tone;

“I’m not sure I believe you, sir, for I rarely see them, and when I do, I get barely a nod of acknowledgement.” Kumar came up to me, and when I looked up at him he had a sympathetic expression on his face. Putting a hand on my arm, he said;

“Eleonora, I believe we owe you an apology, but there is good reason for this behavior. It is through no fault of your own that you are met with this distance.” With a questioning look, I let him continue.

“The crew are all good men, but men still, and them leaving you alone was a condition for you being welcomed aboard. We agreed that whoever broke this condition was no longer fit to travel aboard the Nautilus .” I stared at him. Could this really be it? The reason no one of the crew would talk to me, despite my efforts? Even though I thought I knew the answer, I felt I had to ask Kumar the following;

“What happens to a crewmember who’s no longer fit to travel with you?” With a meaning glance at me, Kumar answered.

“As you know, anyone who boards the Nautilus must never leave her alive.” I gulped, and felt dizzy at this confession. Almost the first words the Captain had ever spoken to me was a promise that I would be safe aboard the Nautilus . I never realised just how much weight was behind these words. 

“The punishment for speaking to me… is death ?” This was absurd, he could not mean it like that, surely. He was almost squirming now.

“Perhaps not quite so literally, no, but at first we did not have the time to finish discussing the terms, since Oskar found you still awake, and in such a dreadful state. The Captain was furious with himself for putting your through those hours, when we thought we had time to talk. He rushed to see to you before we could reach the exact… guidelines for how we were to treat you.” My heart filled with warmth, thinking of the Captain’s great compassion for me, from the very start. 

“Once you had assured him that your companions were honorable men, and we agreed they would be given the same offer as you, we thought it best if you four held to your own company. That way, we would not make you complicit to our… mission. And there was no risk of you coming between us,” he said, with a meaning look. I was still slightly confused at the reasoning, but before I could open my mouth, Kumar continued.

“Madam, please understand, it was an unforeseen situation, your presence onboard. We acted as best we could with the information we had. Had we known what we do today, it would have been handled differently.” 

“How do you mean, ‘what you know to-’...” He held up his hand, interrupting me.

“What I mean is this - in the end, we decided it was easiest if no one gets too close to you, madam, for the sake of peace onboard.” Feeling there might be something he was leaving out, I was about to question him, when another realisation hit me.

“So that’s why you had to look after me in the mess hall? That’s what you told Javier off for?” I was seized by a fear suddenly, and before he could confirm, I blurted out;

“Was Marco in trouble? I did kiss his cheek!”

“You did, miss, and since it was not at his request but of your own choice, he did not face any consequences. Except for maybe half the crew not wanting to talk to him for a week, being so jealous. He would have been better off not bragging about it all the next day.” I blushed profusely at this. Still, the comment had made a different thought stir.

“Sir… Would the rule still apply… were I again the one to… choose to instigate something?” I dared not look at him when I asked this, I was embarrassed, and fearful of my feelings for the Captain being found out. I could feel Kumar studying me.

“We have not discussed it.”

“And… what would be your guess?” I was being too obvious, he must know I meant someone specific, if perhaps not being able to guess who.

“I would say… For me, it depends.”

“It depends? On what?”

“Not on what, on who .” I had to look at him now, I did not at all understand his meaning. 

“If you choose the right person, I personally would be all for it.” I stared at him. Surely he could not mean..?

“Kumar, you are a dear friend to me, and I greatly appreciate your company, but I’m terribly sorry to…” He interrupted me with an amused laugh.

“No, no, madam, not me. You are a handsome woman, indeed, but still a woman.” My eyes widened even more. He smirked. 

“Why did you think the stateroom next to the Captain’s was uninhabited? We have no use for guest rooms aboard the Nautilus . I moved out of it nearly two years ago, to stay with Jakub.” Obviously taking my shock as disapproval, he continued.

“Madam, I understand this is offensive to you, but we have left society’s rules behind…” I hastened to interject.

“No, sir, please. I should hope we are well enough acquainted for you to know that I am not easily offended, and I have no objections whatsoever to any form of love, as long as it is good and true.” Now it was his turn to be shocked, but soon regained his composure. Chuckling, he said;

“I did not know you were such free thinkers in Sweden! If I had, I would have visited.” I smiled. 

“Not Sweden, I’m afraid, but I am. Now tell me, which one is Jakub? Have I met him?” Kumar gave one of his hearty laughs.

“The big one!” I laughed too. Seems it was not only the professor who admired the ‘herculean’ crewmate. Suddenly remembering our previous conversation, I stopped abruptly.

“But sir, then what do you mean, ‘if I choose the right person’?” Kumar composed himself as well.

“Madam, I’m afraid I can’t tell you at this moment. I should like to, very much, but for now, I can only move you around the chess board, and hope the pieces line up the way I would like. That being said, I do not think your idea of a New Years celebration is a bad one.” He smiled conspiratorially, and squeezing my arm again, he left me with these words;

“I will see what I can do.”

Chapter Text

The prospect of spending New Years eve with the crew filled me with conflicting emotions. On the one hand, we had had so much fun three weeks ago at the last party, but on the other hand, what Kumar had told me gave me pause. Did he really mean they weren’t allowed to get to know me, even as friends? I could understand the initial hesitation, and the need to prevent a rift from forming among these men, who had chosen to spend the rest of their lives among themselves only. I dared not guess what he’d meant by his comment about ‘what we know today’, but hoped it meant the rules regarding the crew interacting with me would not be so harsh anymore. If my invitation to Marco’s birthday was anything to go by, Kumar was not against me getting to know them better. Hell, he seemed to be all for it. I was so, so curious to know what he meant by me choosing the right person. Not that it mattered really. The only man onboard who I felt anything but friendship for was the Captain, and next to him any other man I’d ever met paled in comparison. Whenever he was present, all else faded away from my consciousness. The possibility of him being there tomorrow evening, that is, if there was a celebration, filled me with both excitement and dread.

The next morning, there was a note on my breakfast tray. Beyond curious, I near ripped it opened. In small, neat letters, the following was worded;

Madam Larsson

Aboard the Nautilus

December 31st, 1867

Chief Officer Kumar hereby invites Madam Larsson to a New Years dinner, to take place in the dining room at 8 o’clock, this evening. He hopes nothing will prevent Madam from attending the celebration, and looks forward to the pleasure of her joining the company.

I chuckled to myself, rolling my eyes at the unnecessary formality. I could imagine Kumar writing these lines with a certain degree of sarcasm, he knew such things didn’t matter to me, even if he would never be able to guess the reason behind this. Now that the occasion was a fact, my positive feelings towards it far outweighed the negative ones. I sighed in relief. We would have a good time, I was sure of it. Captain Nemo probably wouldn’t even show, and I could postpone our next, undoubtedly uncomfortable, encounter for another time. Tonight, I would simply enjoy the company of friends. After finishing my breakfast, I went to find Professor Aronnax, to make sure he too had been invited, as well as Ned Land and Conseil.

I found them all in the lounge, speaking excitedly in French. They kindly switched to English when I appeared. 

“Mademoiselle, good morning! I trust this is your doing?” Pierre held up at note, identical to the one I’d received. I grinned at him.

“I hope you have practiced your dancing, my friend.” He turned red, but could not help smiling, and shook his head in reproach. At Ned Land’s confusion, I had to retell the story to him as well. His laugh bellowing, he dunked the professor’s back.

“Well, damn, your Captain Nemo sure is eager to see you do the cancan, professor!” Poor Pierre turned even redder, and Conseil shot the harpooner an angry glance. Perhaps no one onboard was unaware of the professor’s feelings at this point. I hastened to save him.

“If not the Captain, then at least his chief officer. I do not know if Nemo will be in attendance.” Ned suddenly looked more interested, while Pierre’s shoulders slumped. He clearly had no reason not to desire the Captain’s presence tonight, like I did. 

“The jailor is letting his prisoners run free for the night?” I shook my head reprimandingly, but not very serious. 

“Ned!” He held up his hands in an apologetic gesture.

“Now, ma’am, I know you and the professor would be happier with him there. Me, however, well I suddenly feel more inclined to accept the invitation!”

“Oh, you have received one as well! I’m glad, I came to ask you.”

“We have indeed. Me and Conseil.” I turned to the younger man, and attempted to ask him in my abysmal French;

“Et vous, monsieur, vous viens?” He bowed slightly to me, and replied in what I by now understood amounted to something along the lines of him going if the professor was. Could have guessed as much. I smiled at him, and nodded.

“Excellent. Gentlemen, I think we shall have a brilliant evening.” Ned shrugged.

“We might, if Nemo’s not in attendance, but his Palmata liquor is!” 

Returning to my cabin later, my hair wet from a bath, I found Kumar waiting outside my door, a folded piece of fabric in his arms. He lit up when he saw me. 

“Madam! I will boldly assume this is you getting ready for our feast tonight?” I smiled back.

“It is indeed. Why, did you think I’d back out after forcing you to arrange it?” Laughing, he then held out the fabric to me. 

“Madam, I trust you are comfortable as is, however, I thought you might like something different for the evening.” Frowning, I took the fabric from him and held it up. It was a dress! Made from the same egg shell white fabric as the byssus shirts, it was long, the skirt flowing, and with the high waist line popular at this time. The long sleeves were the same bishop style ones as the shirts we all wore. I was stunned. 

“Kumar! It’s beautiful! Where did you get this?!” He shrugged, but looked quite pleased.

“I asked Emaan to make one up when he had the time. It is maybe not quite what you are used to, but I hope it will do.” His words were more true than he could have imagined, but not for the reason he thought. I was of course more used to wearing trousers than skirts, and the fact that my normal clothes were considered men’s ones here barely registered with me. Overjoyed, not by the dress so much as his thoughtfulness, I threw my arms around him. 

“Thank you, Kumar! Thank you for everything.” Patting my back, he loosed my grip around him. This perceptive individual had understood my sentiment, and smiled sympathetically. 

“I hope things will change for the better onboard, soon, Madam. I will see you tonight.”

Chapter Text

As the time approached 8 o’clock, there was a knock at my door. Opening it, I found Professor Aronnax outside, looking nervous.

“Bonsoir, mademoiselle. I was wondering if I might accompany you to the dining room?” His eyes were almost pleading. I smiled, understanding he must be anxious to finally meet the crew, since he had not yet had a chance to properly speak to any of them, really. I had already been ready for a good while, since there was nothing I could do but get dressed and brush my hair. 

“Professor, bonsoir! It would be my pleasure!” Noticing the dress I was wearing, he exclaimed;

“Ah, vous êtes très belle, mademoiselle!” He didn’t comment further on where it might come from, but I could see him trying to guess. Taking his arm, we went down the gangway together. 

As we stepped into the dining room, we found it already filled with what must have been most of the crew. The chairs had been removed, and a buffet of finger food was laid out on the table. The light had been dimmed, and the only thing missing from a perfect party was the music. Noticing us, the room quieted, and all eyes fell to us. I suddenly felt self-conscious in my dress, perhaps it had been a bit much. Making his way through the crowd, Kumar came up to us. He bowed, and giving one of his jovial smiles, kindly welcomed us. 

“Please, help yourselves to the food and drink.” Then, leaning in, he asked me with a wink;

“I hope this will do for the lady?” Smiling back, not holding back my admiration for this hastily planned party, I put a hand on his arm.

“I couldn’t have done it better myself, and that’s the highest compliment I can pay to anyone!” He threw his head back with a laugh, and held out his arm in a welcoming gesture. As the conversations started up again, me and Aronnax went up to the buffet. It was a spread worthy of the finest gathering, Adham had truly outdone himself. I must find out who he was, and pay him my compliments. 

A few more people arrived after us, among them Conseil and Ned Land. The latter needed no encouragement, but went straight for the food and drink. At first, the four of us stuck together, not knowing who we might speak to in what language. The crew did not make an effort either, apart from kindly nods and a bow here or there as I met their eyes. Captain Nemo was, as expected, nowhere to be seen. I started despairing, perhaps this had not been such a good idea. After all, myself and Aronnax had concluded ourselves long ago that the crew may have no interest whatsoever in getting to know us. Marco’s birthday party had simply been an exception, I had provided some entertainment, that was all. The rule to not get involved with me had clearly been completely superfluous. I would never be a part of them. How could I, how could we, when they would barely even share their names with us? As I was in the middle of these bleak musings, me and the other convicts were stood to the side, and I could imagine similar ideas in their heads. Ned had just returned from refilling his glass for a third time in the thirty minutes we’d been here, and I was tempted to do the same, when our host for the evening made his way over to us again. 

“Gentlemen, madam, how are you enjoying the evening?” All of us squirmed at this, but the dear Aronnax answered in his always polite way;

“Tremendously, sir!” Unfortunately, as you know, the professor is completely unable to tell a lie, and Kumar, in his good-natured way, couldn’t help but laugh at this obvious pretense. 

“Professor, I do hope we can improve it still! The Captain tells me you are refining your already phenomenal works on the ocean depths, I am curious as to what you have observed so far?” To my knowledge, Kumar did not share our fascination for marine life whatsoever, but he was a very kind man, and was humouring the professor. Aronnax gave one of his bashful smiles, and explained that he may not be able to give a detailed description in English. Kumar surprised me by switching to French, and they delved into a discussion about the sea, more than that I was not able to comprehend. Conseil, always happy to share his knowledge, joined in as well. I expected Ned to do the same, but he looked completely uninterested. I took pity on him. 

“Enjoying the Palmata liquor, Mr. Land?” He shrugged.

“The liquor, yes. The company, not so much.” 

“Perhaps they just need a bit more of it as well,” I said encouragingly. He huffed.

“A great deal more, I should say, before they make for enjoyable company. At least if there was some music to listen to, this party would be bearable.” 

“It would be nice, yes, but from what I understand no one onboard apart from the Captain plays any instrument, and I’m definitely not drunk enough to give a performance yet.” He gave a joyless laugh.

“The Captain, a musician! Of course, the perfect Captain would be, wouldn’t he? What does he play then, that organ?” I made a face at this. 

“Ha! I should have known. Pretentious instrument, that. Now, a guitar, there’s a real instrument, and if I had mine, I would liven up this party for sure.” My eyes widened.

“Ned! You play the guitar?” 

“I sure do, not half bad either, if I say so myself.” An idea had struck me, but it might be risky. Could be high reward too, though. I poked Kumar gently, saving him from Aronnax and Conseil talking his ears of, naming every fish we’d seen so far. 

“Sir, I have just found out that Mr. Land here plays the guitar, and was thinking whether it might be appreciated were he to play a tune? That is, if there is one onboard?” I added hastily, wanting to avoid the awkwardness if Kumar did not want Ned touching Elijah’s guitar. He seemed to think it over for a moment, and I trusted his judgment completely when it came to the crew. Turning to Ned, he said aimably;

“Mr. Land, if you are amenable, I’m sure your playing would be greatly appreciated!” Ned shrugged again, but did actually look a bit excited at the opportunity to show off. Kumar bowed, and asked one of the crew to go fetch the instrument. I assume that’s what the words meant, anyway.

Ned had not overstated his ability, and having sat down on a chair in the adjoining library, the room soon filled with a dozen or so crewmembers who came to listen. I did not recognise the first two songs he played, and he did not sing, even though from what I remembered from our drunken Christmas Eve together, his voice wasn’t half bad. When he started a third tune, I saw a man in the dining room nudge his friend, and nod towards the library. His friend lit up, and the two came into the room, and started singing. I realised I knew the song too! Or rather, I knew the Johnny Cash version. Sweet Betsy from Pike. I had no idea it was this old! Overjoyed, I joined in too, and soon a couple others followed. Ned was singing along, looking a lot less glum than earlier. In lieu of a harmonica, we whistled along as best we could. More people spilled into the room, and the spirit of the party was heightened immensely. Soon, requests were being shouted at our troubadour, and although he still did not speak to anyone, he took them into account. 

The time was nearing 10 o’clock, and Ned had ceased his playing. Amidst the loud conversations, the four of us were stood together again, when Ned announced he would be going back to his cabin. Disappointed, but not surprised, I bid him good night. He’d stayed much longer than I’d initially thought. Conseil said something to the professor, probably amounting to “if Master is agreeable, I will go with Mr. Land”. I saw Ned try to give the guitar back to Kumar, but the ever generous chief officer must have told him to keep it, for he bowed, and brought it with him as he left with Conseil. I smiled, hoping tonight might indeed be a turning point for all of us onboard. 

Putting a hand on my arm, Aronnax told me;

“Mademoiselle, I think I will retire as well.” Terribly let down, I stared at him.

“Already, sir? It is not even midnight yet!” Bowing to me, he smiled softly.

“The new year will arrive, chérie, whether I am here to greet it or not.”

With those words, he left me, and I looked after my companion in dismay. Before I could contemplate his melancholy words, I felt a hand on my shoulder. 

“I see we have been deceived, Madam.” Turning around, I met Kumar’s eyes with a frown.

"Deceived, sir?” 

“Our dance tutor has left, before the lesson could begin!” Laughter erupted from the group he was stood with, they were clearly all English-speakers. I smilingly shook my head. Ever the entertainer, I felt the need to continue the joke.

“Don’t worry, my friend, I will teach you the cancan!” Loud cheers erupted from the group at this, but Kumar gave them another one of his stern looks, and told them off in Nautilese. Turning to me, he said reprimandingly;

“Not wearing that dress, you’re not!” I was alarmed, realising what I’d said, but quickly regained my composure. 

“Well, no, at least not before a few more of these!” I said, holding up my glass. Our group could not help but laugh at this, despite Kumar looking slightly displeased. One of the men was quick to fetch me a refill as a reply, and suddenly, we were all talking and laughing just as we had been three weeks ago.

Chapter Text

“No, no, at first you bend the knee, then kick with your leg straight out! No, you have to switch sides too!” I instructed, words slightly distorted by the cigar in my mouth. I’m not entirely sure how things escalated to this point, but here we were. I believe the open bar might be the culprit. Or my drunken self’s constant need for attention. Either way, I was stood with two men either side, arms slung around each other’s shoulders, trying to teach them the cancan. We’d gained an audience of about twenty other crewmembers, and I was doing my best to not be too true to the original dance, and keep my skirt down. Lucky it was so billowy. So far, they’d seen an ankle at best. Kumar was watching, massaging his head, but laughing all the same. 

“You lot are hopeless! I give up!” I said laughing, sinking into a sofa. I was met with mild protests, before the group continued their efforts on their own. I have no idea how long he’d been stood there, but when I saw him, I was overjoyed. Leaning against the doorframe that led to the lounge, was Captain Nemo.

“Captain!” I cried out, and the crew all lifted their glasses with a cheer, greeting their commander, before going back to their conversations and their dancing. All thoughts of embarrassment were gone in my inebriated state, so I jumped up from the sofa and ran to him. At first he smiled, seeming happy to see me, but then his expression was clouded by anguish for a second. I stopped in front of him when I saw this, unsure of myself suddenly. I don’t know what I’d had in mind, an embrace? That’s how normal people greeted each other in Sweden, in my day. But this was not Sweden, nor my day, and Captain Nemo was not a normal man. Before I could compose myself, he took my hand, and kissed it. My head was spinning, trying to understand what was happening. When his eyes met mine, all thoughts went silent. 

“Happy new year, Eleonora. You look radiant.” I blushed deeply, having to break the eye contact before answering.

“Thank you, Captain. A happy new year to you.” I met his eyes again, shyly. The misery was not completely gone from them, but it seemed he was doing his best to keep it at bay. I could not begin to guess the reason behind it, but hoped he would not regret coming. He seemed to have come to a resolution of trying to enjoy himself, for he smiled a little, and then asked:

“I see you have had to start the dancing lessons without me.”

Exhilarated that he was joking, I answered him;

“Indeed Captain, but I’m afraid the dear professor has gone to bed already, so I have had to take it upon myself to be the teacher.” 

His smile widened, and he raised an eyebrow.

“Have you indeed? And, pray tell, where would a lady such as yourself have learnt the cancan?” Perhaps not thinking quite clearly, I shrugged and said casually;

“TV!” The Captain did not have time to question me, before I hastened to say;

“It is not only the dancing lessons you are late for, Captain, but you are also pitifully behind on the drinking! If we hurry, we might be able to get you a glass or two before all the Palmata liquor is gone!” I coaxed him further into the room, and he followed me, albeit not without protest.

“Rest assured, miss, I do not suffer for my sobriety. I’ve never made a habit of drinking in excess.” I rolled my eyes, and handed him a glass. Clinking it with my own, I said teasingly;

“I’m not asking you to make it a habit, I’m asking you to make an exception!” He shook his head, all the while smiling, but did sip the drink.

“I cannot promise that I will.” As last time, I was emboldened by the alcohol in my blood, and while maintaining the jest in my voice, I asked him;

“Why not? What could possibly happen?” There was no hidden meaning behind my words, surely there could be no harm in him unwinding for just one evening, but his eyes flashed darkly. In a deep, sultry voice he said;

“Circe, since you are on the precipice of turning my men into swine, I may decide I need to convince you to turn them back.” My smile faded. Was he angry with me for persuading Kumar to arrange the celebration? But he did not look angry. I could not read his expression, despite him watching me intently. I had no idea what he could have possibly meant. Perhaps he was displeased with the amount of alcohol we had consumed, but no one was misbehaving. The mood of the room was festive, but nowhere near out of control. Was he eluding to the deal they had all made, to not get too close to me? Bowing to me, he left to speak to a group of the crew on the other side of the room. I was dumbfounded. The Captain proved as indecipherable as always. Before my thoughts started spinning out of control completely, I was once again saved by Kumar. I did not hear what he was saying, and rudely interrupted him to ask;

“Who is Circe?” He frowned, and looked at me questioningly.

“The Captain, he called me Circe, and said I was turning the men into swine!” I explained, distressed. Kumar’s eyes widened.

“He said that?” 

“Yes! What does it mean? Is he angry with me?” I could see Kumar calculate something in his head, and looked triumphant for a second, before smiling reassuringly.

“Not at all, Madam. Come, Thomas had a request for you.” I tried to protest, wanting an answer, but was coerced back to our group. One of the men who’d started the singing earlier looked at me expectantly.

“Ma’am, if it’s not too forward, I was wondering if you might sing that song from the mess hall?” I furrowed my brows a bit.

“Oh, which one do you mean?” 

“The love song, ma’am,” he said, a bit embarrassed. I smiled. He was talking about I walk the line . This dude would have loved Johnny Cash. Not feeling like singing a love song, I said instead;

“I’ll do you one better.” Quickly refilling my glass, I realised as I sat down on a chair that those traitors had warned the other groups nearest us that there would be a performance. Clearing my throat, I started.

“This one’s called A boy named Sue .” The song was met with roaring laughter, and they were clapping along. I couldn’t blame them, it is a hilarious song. Intrigued by the commotion, the rest of the room was watching too now. As I finished, my group of English speaking friends were howling with laughter. I stood up, and bowed dramatically. Someone gave a whistle, but the man next to him punched him in the gut lightly, and his friends mocked him good-humouredly. Thomas came up to me.

“If it’s all the same, ma’am, I’d still like to hear the love song.” He must have been his early forties, and had a gentle look about him. I put a hand on his arm, conceding.

“Alright then, you will.” Turning to Kumar, I asked;

“How late is it, sir, do we have time for another one before the New Year?” Checking the chronometer, Kumar informed us that it was a quarter to midnight. Not sure where I got the courage, I spoke loudly.

“Then I shall be happy to sing your love song, Thomas, but there is an individual among us who has not yet shared his musical talents with us this evening.” I met the Captain’s gaze across the room, and he smiled at me, with a dangerous glint in his eyes. I was bold to call him out like this, but we were among friends, his friends, and I felt more daring than when we were alone. Several of the men turned to him, and with what must be described as reverence, seemed to implore him in their secret language. Without ever breaking our eye contact, he answered me;

“Come midnight, we will move into the lounge, and I will play.” Ever the confident commander. His statement was met with cheers and thanks. I smiled at him, and turning back to my company, obliged Thomas’s request. 

In the lounge, we counted down to the strike of midnight, and the New Year was met with the clinking of glasses. It felt so normal, until I remembered we celebrated the arrival of the year 1868. Sitting down at the organ, the Captain waved me to come up to him. Slightly nervous, I did so, and he said in a quiet voice, for my ears only;

“You asked if I might ever accompany you. Therefore, I now expect you to sing.” My eyes widened, but before I could protest, he started playing. I relaxed slightly. I knew this song. 

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,

And never brought to mind?

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,

And days of auld lang syne?

As we got to the chorus, more people joined in. By the end, the whole crew was singing along, as best they could in English. Some men had their arms around their comrades’ shoulders, swaying along to the music, and glasses were raised at the end of each verse. An intense sense of community reigned in this strange place below the waves, and I felt at home. As he finished playing, Captain Nemo arose to the sound of applause. He nodded to his crew, before turning to me.

“Well done, Eleonora,” he said, looking down into my eyes. Before I could think of a reply, for I was sure he wasn’t just referring to the singing, he bowed to me, and retired to his stateroom.

Chapter Text

To my disappointment, no great change in our situation onboard was noticeable in the days following our evening spent with the crew. We still rarely saw them, and were met with the same polite, but indifferent approach when we did. Several days passed before I saw either the Captain or Kumar again, and when I finally did, it was under the most unfortunate circumstances. 

“Un accident?” asked the professor.

“Non, un incident,” answered the ever-temperate Captain. 

Being an avid hiker, and generally outdoorsy person, I did not quite realise how much I had missed dry land until we jumped out of the skiff. The smell of this tropical landscape was unfamiliar, but pleasant, and as much as I loved a sea breeze, it was a welcome change after our two months aboard the Nautilus. The prospect of a hunting expedition however, seemed much less pleasant than spending a day to myself on the beach. I could go for a swim, or wade through the shallows as I would have on my island back home, looking for shells and little marine friends. 

“Say, gentlemen, would you be much opposed to me forgoing the hunting? I think I might rather stay here on the beach.” In truth, the thought of hunting and slaughtering did make me uncomfortable, being used to buying meat neatly packaged in the supermarket, with no semblance to the animal it had once been. I knew this hypocrisy wasn’t an admirable trait, and for once thanked the general view on women of the time for giving me an excuse to avoid joining in. Ned spoke up, with a mocking tone;

“Oh, so the lady is too squeamish to partake in the hunt? I suppose you’d still have no objection to taking part in the dining, though?” I laughed. 

“Quite right, mr. Land, and I expect the feast to be served me at noon sharp!” With a chuckle, he dunked my back. 

“A feast it will be, rest assured of that. Well, if your highness has made her mind up, then we best be off. Wouldn’t want to disappoint the lady.” 

“Mademoiselle, if you are sure, but at least take a rifle for yourself,” said Aronnax, looking slightly worried. Fortunately, he knew better than to argue with me by now. I conceded, and assured my friends that there would be no need for it. Despite my assurances, I was also left with a machete. Fortunately, the only use I had for it all day was for breaking open coconuts. I spent the hours leisurely wandering the beach, exploring the jungle closest to the shoreline, and as always, contemplating my strange existence. This place might not have looked any different, had I visited it in my day. The trees, plants, and the marine life would have been here all the same. The thought was comforting, and after going for a refreshing swim, I laid in the shade of the palm trees. It felt almost as if I was on holiday, and I relished in the feeling. I let all thoughts of the Nautilus and her intriguing Captain fade away, focusing only on the tropical waters and the warm breeze. I had brought with me a book, Charles Dickens’s Great Expectations , which strangely was not even a decade old at this point in time. Regardless of its age, it was as always a good read. Eventually, I must have fallen asleep, and was awoken some time later by my friends returning with their prices. I laughed at them, for they had found no game whatsoever, but as soon as they gave me a taste of the grilled bread-fruit, I declared that it had been a most successful hunt after all. 

Chapter Text

Back on the Nautilus , having just had my supper, I made my way to the lounge as it was not yet late. To my surprise, I found Captain Nemo there. He greeted me aimiably, but with no excessive warmth, and I found myself once again wishing to see his authentic, relaxed self. These rare occasions lit up my life onboard, I’m embarrassed to admit. This was not one of them, but he did graciously enquire after how our excursion had gone. 

“Well, as I was not with the hunting party to assist with my superior skills, they were unfortunately unsuccessful, apart from acquiring some frankly excellent bread-fruit,” I joked, but my voice faded when I saw his expression. His eyes had gone wide, and he now strode up to me, his whole demeanor completely changed. 

“You spent the day alone on the island?” he asked, in a grim voice.

“I - yes, most of it. In all honesty I am not too comfortable with the idea of hunting, so I stayed mostly on the beach. But I had a lovely-”

“Mostly on the beach? You ventured into the jungle on your own?” he interrupted, his eyes shooting daggers. I felt myself cowering before his imposing figure.

“Only a little ways… I’ve never been in the tropics before, I wanted to see what it was like… And I was armed, I had both a rifle and machete.” The Captain started pacing the room, his arms crossed over his chest. 

“Eleonora, are you so miserable aboard the Nautilus that you must take every opportunity to endanger your life?! Am I to forbid you from leaving this ship even for the briefest moment, in order to keep my promise of no harm befalling you?” I was dumbfounded at his reaction. Mortified, I could feel tears well up in my eyes at this scolding, as if I were a disobedient child. 

“No, sir…” I whispered, trying to stave off the inevitable. The Captain stopped his pacing, watching me. As he came up to me again, I silently cursed myself as I felt the first tears running down my cheeks. I closed my eyes in irritation. Expecting the scolding to go on, I instead felt a warm hand on my cheek, caressing away a tear with its thumb. His voice now soft, Captain Nemo spoke again.

“You vowed to me last time that you would stay with the group.” I opened my eyes at this. He looked anguished, and I felt a pang of guilt. I had promised him, it was true, but this situation felt so wholly different that I had completely forgotten. Too upset to think of a better reply, I simply told him the truth, stupid as it was.

“I’m sorry, sir, I… I forgot… Or rather, didn’t realise it applied to this outing.” I had to look away from his piercing gaze, feeling silly beyond belief. He once again folded his arms, and said in a icy voice.

“It did apply, and your disobedience might have had dire consequences, miss Larsson.” He started up his pacing again, no longer looking at me.

“You are dismissed.” I felt my head spinning, and not being able to process the Captain’s mood swings with him in such close proximity, I did as told without arguing. As soon as the door to the salon closed behind me, I sank down to my knees. Trying to make sense of what had just happened, I felt foolish, upset, angry, but also filled with warmth from his touch. I went to light a cigar to calm down.

I had barely finished it before I heard voices coming from the room next door. I quietly hurried over to the door, and listened.

“Professor Aronnax, I entrust you and your companions to look after the young lady, and what do you do? You leave her alone, for hours, on an island in New Guinea! Have you any idea what might have befallen her?” His voice was ice, but there was fire barely beneath the surface of it. I heard the professor starting to say something in French, sounding quite sheepish, but I would have none of it. Opening the door, I interrupted him by marching into the room.

“Enough! Captain, please, I made the decision to stay behind. The professor has no blame in this, and I will not have you diminish my autonomy by implying that I am in any way his or anyone else’s responsibility. Any danger befalling me would have been my fault, and mine alone.” The Captain seemed actually dumbstruck by this for several moments, a rare occasion. I’d put him in a spot so that he could not continue blaming Aronnax without insulting my abilities. He studied me with an unreadable expression, before answering me calmly;

“Very well, miss, if that’s how it is to be, then I suppose you alone should face the results of your actions. You are not to go with the professor and his companions to Gueboroa tomorrow.” I stared at him, but said nothing. I’d rather be unfairly punished than Captain Nemo continuing to admonish Professor Aronnax for letting a grown woman make her own decisions. 

“Professor, good night.” Aronnax needed no more encouragement to leave the uncomfortable situation, and bowed to the Captain, before giving me a compassionate look. As soon as he was out the door leading to his stateroom, the Captain turned to me. 

“No doubt, you feel this terribly unjust,” he said, in a sarcastic tone. Not wanting to escalate the situation further, I stood straight, and said in an indifferent voice;

“Whatever punishment the Captain sees fit, I shall accept.” I thought I could see the ghost of a smile on his face, but could not be sure.

“Ah, and would you have felt the same way, had not your friend been berated such?” The realisation dawned on me, and I could no longer stay calm.

“You knew I was listening, that’s why you spoke to him in English!” Here I thought I’d had the upper hand for a moment, taking the responsibility for myself, but it was all according to Nemo’s calculations. Now he was definitely smiling. I suppose that’s what I got for crying like a baby, then demanding I be treated like an adult. Closing my eyes in defeat, I quietly accepted that I had been bested. Still, it was unfair to Professor Aronnax.

“I do wish you hadn’t involved the professor,” I said bitterly, but it was directed more towards myself than the Captain.

“I am not happy with his conduct either, even if he technically did not disobey me.” I narrowed my eyes at him, not sure why he wouldn’t be, really, but before I could question him he shut me down.

“You are still dismissed, Eleonora.” Biting back a reply, I turned on my heel, and marched back to my cabin.

Chapter Text

The next morning, I came up on the platform to see my friends off to another day in freedom. I bitterly explained to Ned Land why I would not be coming with them, and you can imagine his reaction.

“That damned Captain! And as if we would have left you if there was any danger! He’s a scoundrel, that Nemo, keeping you here. Well, I will bring you back a meal that will make even that devil jealous!” I smiled sadly, and waved to them as they set off in the skiff. I stayed up on the platform, and started plotting my revenge for not being allowed to go. Perhaps I would take off all my clothes here instead, and go for a swim, in daylight this time? Or maybe I would get hideously drunk, and throw up in the oyster shell fountain in the lounge. Actually, why not both? My musings were interrupted by a voice from behind me. 

“Marooned with the rest of us today, are you, Madam?” 

“You know very well why, Kumar. He tells you everything, didn’t you say?” Sitting down next to me, in his constant good mood, Kumar answered me;

“Not everything, Madam. This, yes.” I huffed. 

“Can’t really get much right, can I?”  He put a hand on my shoulder.

“I disagree, Madam. The Captain is simply worried for you safety.” I gave him a look of disagreement. 

“Felt more like he needed to put me in my place, actually. I suppose I had it coming after New Years.” Kumar looked puzzled. 

“When I forced him to play in front of everyone,” I explained. 

“Madam, you are being too hard on yourself. The Captain does play, on occasion, and does not mind if we listen. Granted, he does not like for us to make a thing of it, but I think you know he is not a shy man.” He gave me a meaning look, and I had to laugh a little. 

“The crew has spoken of nothing but the party this past week. It is rare we make an occasion for celebrating, though I cannot say why for sure. It was a grand idea of yours, and I think we are all grateful to you.” 

“Kumar, I am glad the crew enjoyed themselves, but all credit goes to you for arranging it so splendidly.”

“And what did I do? Ask Adham to make some food, make sure the dining room was in order. That does not make a party. You saw to it we had a good time, asking the harpooner to play the guitar, singing, teaching us the cancan.” He nudged me with an elbow, and I threw my head back with a laugh, remember the chaos. 

“Well, credit where credit is due, I think the Palmata liquor played its part.” Now it was his turn to laugh, but I had grown sullen again. 

“Kumar, you said you hoped things might change for the better onboard, but there has been no change, despite the crew being ‘thankful’, as you say. I still barely see anyone, and I only ever talk to the other ‘passengers’.” I could not help but whine, feeling quite desolate with the current situation, especially under today’s circumstances. 

“Ah, Madam, I meant…” He stopped himself, before smiling. 

“Nevermind. Will you come with me to have breakfast?” He arose, and offered me his hand. I took it, assuming he meant we might eat together in the dining room, but when we went inside, he instead led me to one of the doors omitted from our initial tour of the submarine. Behind it was another set of stairs, leading to a lower level previously unknown to me. When I hesitated, Kumar chuckled.

“You do not remember the way to the mess hall, Madam? I should say, I did not realise you had had that much to drink that night!” Neither did I, and thought perhaps it was also due to my thoughts being occupied elsewhere at the time that I had apparently completely forgotten walking down and up a set of stairs. At least that explained why I had not been able to find my way back.

I did however recognise the door when we got to it, and I could hear bustling inside. Opening it, we were not met with the same reaction as last time, but the room instead silenced. I could feel myself blushing as all eyes turned to me. There must have been about two thirds of the crew in there, having their breakfast. Kumar said something in a sharp tone, and everyone quickly went back to eating. 

“Madam, please,” he said with a smile, gesturing to a spread at the back of the room. I helped myself to a plate, but was far too nervous to fill it with more than a morsel of food. As I turned around, it felt as though I had stepped into my high school cafeteria alone, not knowing where I might sit. I recognised most faces, but none were looking at me. Kumar put his hand on my elbow, steering me towards the giant form of Jakub. Kumar barked something in Nautilese as we got to the table, and the men scrambled to rise and make room for us. I hated to impose, but could only thank Kumar as he pulled the chair on one end out for me. 

“Tea, Madam?” he kindly offered.

“Oh, uh, please,” I answered, quite timid. As my companion went to fetch me my tea, Jakub turned to me, and smiled. He said something in Nautilese, which of course, I did not understand. I just smiled back, extremely uncomfortable by this point, and wished I was back alone on the beach. I had no idea why Kumar had thought this a good idea, when my thoughts were interrupted by a voice I recognised, from further down the table.

“Han önskar er god morgon.” (“He’s wishing you a good morning.”) It was Oskar, and I gave him a relieved smile, nodding happily. Turning to Jakub, I tried my best to imitate the words he’d said.

“Ornak varush..?” The men nearest me all chuckled at this. It wasn’t a mean sound, and I relaxed a little. Jakub grinned widely, and said something to Kumar as he returned. He simply shook his head, looking a bit exasperated, but the men laughed. Opposite me, a little to the left, were Thomas, and his English-speaking friend. I did not count on Oskar to engage in any more conversation with me, with his track-record, so I focused on them. They both seemed happy to talk to me, and I was sure they were both American, although I could not place their accents precisely. Kumar would join in occasionally, or speak to Jakub, but I saw nothing in their demeanor that would have given away that they were more than friends. Perhaps there was a strict ‘no PDA’-rule aboard the Nautilus , which led me to think there might very well be other couples among the crew. After half an hour or so, Kumar stood up.

“Madam, I must return to my duties, but you are more than welcome to stay.” I smiled at him, and as I was now having quite a pleasant time, I told him;

“I just might do that. Thank you, Kumar.” I squeezed his hand, wanting him to know how much his efforts meant to me.

Chapter Text

Although the mess hall emptied somewhat, many crewmates remained, and others appeared. I did not know what the schedule for the crew was aboard the Nautilus , as we usually sailed both night and day, but assumed it might be slightly more lax while we were aground. Once our table had cleared a little, I saw two other men from the group I’d talked to on New Years Eve come over. One of them hoisted up a deck of cards from his pocket, which was met by cheers. I asked the gentle Thomas what we would be playing for. 

“Nothing, ma’am, just the bragging rights,” he answered me with a smile.

“Hard currency aboard the Nautilus , though,” his friend, William, filled in with a wink. They explained the rules of the game to me, and I believe I’d played the modern version at some point. I quickly caught up, and there was no need for us all to speak the same language. Gestures and words were understood in the context of the game regardless, and we had an excellent time together. I wasn’t doing half bad, but couldn’t help remembering the proverb about luck at cards, with some dismay. It was soon forgotten though, as I bested them all by the third round. Either they were all very good men, or the lack of wagers meant there were no sore losers, for they all cheered me on. William gathered up the deck, and showed us a card trick. I think the others must have seen it quite a few times before, since they rolled their eyes at him, but I was mightily impressed. Just as I thought I knew the trick he tried to play on me, the cards on the table had somehow magically switched, and I was dumbfounded. Letting out a cry of glee, I clapped my hands, and the men at our table laughed. William looked immensely satisfied with my reaction. I took the deck from him.

“My turn now.” I fanned out the cards. 

“Pick a card, any card. Now, show it to the group, but not to me.” He did so.

“Place it back on top.” As he did so, I instantly snatched it up, and showed it to him.

“Is this your card?” It was incredibly stupid, but somehow the funniest thing they’d ever seen, since the whole group howled with laughter at my ‘trick’. I laughed with them, and noticed the other tables looking over, seeming amused as well. 

The day went on, and since Thomas, William, and a few others were still with me in the mess hall, I concluded they must have a day off. I was glad for it, all my troubles from the morning forgotten, and we were having a grand time playing cards, joking, and enjoying a cigar here and there. We might has well have been at a bar, despite not indulging in any of the liquor this time. Every time the door opened, an excited face appeared, and joined us. Our table eventually got quite crowded, and the single deck of cards was no longer enough. A bag of dice was brought out in its stead, and we switched to a game of Liar’s dice, which unravelled into a whole tournament. Whenever someone had to leave the mess hall, they did so with clear chagrin. I’m not sure how many hours had passed, but in the middle of a game, I felt a hand on my shoulder. 

“Trying to turn the men into swine again, are you, Madam? I shall have to inform the Captain.” At first I turned cold, but when I turned around, Kumar had a wide grin on his face. I breathed out, and smiled. 

“I still don’t know what that means, sir, if it’s not meant as admonition.” 

“Maybe just as well. Now, make room, I need to get back to my duties soon, but I could wait no longer to join, hearing of all the fun you’re having down here.” I happily surrendered my place to him, giving myself a chance to contemplate his words. Was this something out of the ordinary, then? Perhaps the men usually didn’t have days off, and it was only due to our running aground. 

When dinner time came around, the mess hall filled with almost the whole crew, with one notable exception. I felt bad that Captain Nemo was missing out on the games and camaraderie. As we were eating, I asked Kumar quietly, while the rest of the table were in a heated discussion;

“Pray tell, is the Captain so busy with his work he cannot join us?” Kumar gave an indecipherable look, but answered me;

“Indeed not, Madam, I believe he is currently in the lounge.” 

“Oh. Then… should we not invite him?” Suppressing a smile, he said in an indifferent tone;

“A splendid idea, Madam. Will you find your way this time?” I frowned. Would he not be coming with me? Perhaps he did not want to miss out on the good times in here, having been busy most of the day. 

“I believe so, sir.” He nodded, looking quite smug. As soon as I’d finished my dinner, I left to go find the Captain.

Chapter Text

Stepping into the library, I could hear music coming from the organ in the next room. It was not the same anguished outpouring of emotions I had heard before, but I still took care to knock before entering. I did not get a reply, and opened the door carefully. There he was, his tall, statuesque figure swaying with the music, as his long fingers moved over the keys. I was mesmerised for a second, and then realised I had completely forgotten I was technically supposed to be angry with him. Kumar inviting me to the lovely day in the mess hall had made all feelings of unfairness at being denied going on the outing disappear. I’d never been a resentful person, and found it even more difficult with the Captain. Every moment I was absent from him, no matter how pleasant, I found I missed him. Therefore, I now resolved to forget about last night, and move forward, in the hopes of spending an evening with him. 

“Captain…” I said, finding my voice a little weak. He had not heard me. 

“Captain?” I asked, a little louder, but got no reaction from him. I stepped closer, and when he still did not notice me, I said jokingly;

“Odysseus!” He stopped abruptly, and turned around. His face brightened with a warm smile, which took my breath away. I could feel myself smiling back, overjoyed at his reaction. A bit pathetic, really, how little I required from this man to feel content. 

“Ah, miss Eleonora. I trust your day has not been too terrible, all things considered,” he said, facing the organ again. I suddenly felt stupid. Why would he not have been aware of what was going on in the mess hall, when the whole crew had been in and out all day? If he’d wanted to join us, he would have. Instead, I’d come to pester him, while he was clearly content on his own. I could think of no other excuse for having interrupted him though, so I pretended as if I’d not just come to this realisation.

“I… Yes, it’s been fine, thank you. I came to see whether you’d like to join us all in the mess hall. We’ve been quite enjoying ourselves.” My voice didn’t sound very confident. 

“Yes, I heard you’re yet again endeavouring to turn my men into swine.” My heart sank even further. Again with this? Feeling slightly irritated, I answered him in a curt tone;

“Kumar said the same thing, and neither of you will explain to me what you mean by it! Indeed, no one is behaving pig-like in the slightest!” I could see his shoulders moving, he was laughing at me! My irritation grew, I regretted coming to invite him, the ‘scoundrel’, as Ned had called him. Turning his head to me, he said with a fond smile;

“Then, I do not need to convince you to turn them back?” I huffed.

“Indeed not, sir, they are perfect gentlemen!” He turned back to the keys, but I could still hear the laughter in his voice as he said;

“What a shame.” I was dumbstruck. What, now he wanted his crew to behave badly? 

“If that’s the case, perhaps I will indeed try and turn them into pigs, then!” I said indignantly, wanting to defy him, irritate him back, but at this he threw his head back, laughing. 

“I could have sworn you said your father was a professor of ancient history, miss. Did he only teach you about batteries?” Absolutely confounded, I just stared at his back, as he kept playing. I did not know what to do now. He’d given me no answer, at least not in so many words, and in my annoyance I no longer knew if I wanted him to come anyway. Just as I had made up my mind to leave the vexing Captain to his own devices, Professor Aronnax came rushing into the room, looking quite disheveled.

“Professor?” I exclaimed, but he did not hear me. 

“Capitaine!” He was once again far gone into his musical trance, and gave no notice of having heard the man. I watched as Aronnax strode up to the Captain, and boldly touched his hand.

“Capitaine?” He gave a shudder at this, and I could feel myself blushing. Aronnax had touched him so confidently, and I dizzied at the implications of this. Were they closer than I had imagined? I’d pondered the possibility before, certainly, but never before seen any evidence to support it. I could hear them talking, but was too stunned to make out even a word in French. Soon, the professor seemed to have calmed down, and only then noticed me. 

“Mademoiselle! Oh, quelle horreur! I am so thankful you did not come with us today, chérie…” he said, absent-mindedly, before going back the way he came. I stared after him, then turned to Captain Nemo, who was once again playing his somber tune. 

“What did he say, Captain?” This time he heard me, but neither turned nor stopped playing.

“Oh, he was simply worried about the ‘savages’, as he called them, coming aboard the Nautilus ,” he said, sounding carefree.

“Savages, sir?” I said in disbelief.

“Yes, apparently the Papuan natives had found them, and chased after them.” I paled. Sinking down onto one of the sofas, I could see the conversation from yesterday in a different light.

“So there truly was danger on the island?” I whispered, but he had somehow heard.

“Indeed.” I now felt mortified by my behavior the day before, only excused by my complete lack of understanding for this world I’d been hurled back to.

“You were really only trying to protect me, then?” He stopped playing abruptly.

“What else did you think?” His tone let me know that he was well aware of what my feelings had been, and I realised Kumar might have already relayed our conversation from this morning to him. I also realised that the only way to rid myself of the disconcertion was to admit how wrong I’d been. Casting my eyes down, I said earnestly;

“Captain, I’m sorry. Forgive me.” I heard him walk over to me, and sitting down, he studied me.

“Do you now understand the reasoning behind my actions?” I nodded, a lump in my throat preventing me from answering. He took my hand, and the effect was the same as always. All anxiety melted away, and I could breathe deeply again. 

“In the future, I would appreciate it if you trusted me.” Still not daring to meet his eyes, I said;

“I do trust you, Captain.” Then, baring more than I usually dared, added;

“From the very first moment I met you.” I could feel him stiffen beside me, and as I did not want my embarrassment to return, continued in vain effort of a joke;

“Although, technically, I only promised not to risk my life to look at sea anemones, not that I wouldn’t for any other reason…” The hand gripping mine tightened, and I glanced up. He gave me a stern look, before his face softened. A gentle smile graced his lips.

“You are impossible.” I smiled back.

“You are a bit impossible yourself, Captain. If you knew there were hostile natives on the island…”

“I did not know. I made an educated guess. The likelihood of you encountering them were slim, but the professor and his party seem to have been unlucky, for now they have come to the Nautilus .” I froze, my eyes widening.

“They’re still here? But the hatch, it’s open, no? What if they…” He interrupted me gently.

“Miss, you needn’t worry. Despite whatever folly you may undertake outside of it, I am always able to guarantee your safety as long as you’re aboard my vessel.” His reassurance calmed me immediately, although I had no idea how he meant to stave off the potential invaders. Rising, he pulled me up with him, through our still clasped hands.

“Now, what do you say we join the others in the mess hall, as was your initial mission here?” My face lit up, and he smiled down at me. Offering me his arm, we went back down the gangways together, and I was in seventh heaven.

Chapter Text

I believe someone had had the grand idea to bring out the Palmata liquor while I was gone, and so, as we entered the mess hall, we were met by raised glasses. I saw Kumar meeting Captain Nemo’s gaze, and he gave a one-sided smile, shrugging as if to say ‘why not?’. I looked up to watch the Captain’s reaction, but was pleased to see him smiling back, shaking his head slightly. Meeting my eyes, he said, still smiling;

“Seems you need not even be present to work your magic, Circe.” Not letting his bullying spoil my good mood, I ignored him, and grabbed the two glasses stood nearest, although they clearly belonged to someone. I handed him one, clinked it, and downed my own, all in one swift motion. The men around all looked on, stunned, as I went to refill it. The Captain looked amused, and to my great satisfaction, actually followed me. 

“What are we celebrating tonight, then?” I thought for a moment.

“Our last night aground, perhaps?” He rolled his eyes.

“For the last time, the Nautilus is not aground!” Now it was my turn to roll my eyes.

“Very well, then. Twelfth Night was a couple days ago, how about that?” He conceded, and was the one to clink my glass this time.

“To Twelfth Night, then, Viola!” he said, with a meaning glance at my clothes. I smiled at his joke. Despite not being anywhere near drunk already, I was high off of the emotions from the day, and lifted my glass with these words;

“Your Grace!” His eyes flashed at my reference, and he gave an almost prowling smile. 

As you may have guessed by now, it is no great feat to convince me to sing once I’ve had a couple of drinks, and especially easy with an audience as appreciative as the Nautilus ’s crew. Sitting on a table in the corner of the room, the Captain, Kumar, and Jakub nearest me, I thought the following song choice appropriate for the day;

She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes

And she can ruin your faith with her casual lies

And she only reveals what she wants you to see

She hides like a child but she's always a woman to me

She can lead you to love, she can take you or leave you

She can ask for the truth but she'll never believe you

And she'll take what you give her as long as it's free

Yeah, she steals like a thief, but she's always a woman to me

Oh, she takes care of herself, she can wait if she wants

She's ahead of her time

Oh, and she never gives out and she never gives in

She just changes her mind

And she'll promise you more than the garden of Eden

Then she'll carelessly cut you and laugh while you're bleeding

But she'll bring out the best and the worst you can be

Blame it all on yourself 'cause she's always a woman to me

Oh, she takes care of herself, she can wait if she wants

She's ahead of her time

Oh, and she never gives out and she never gives in

She just changes her mind

She is frequently kind and she's suddenly cruel

But she can do as she pleases, she's nobody's fool

And she can't be convicted, she's earned her degree

And the most she will do is throw shadows at you

But she's always a woman to me

I was especially pleased with myself at the line ‘she’s ahead of her time’. In truth, my voice suited Billy Joel’s songs perfectly, and I gave quite a performance. As usual, I was cheered on by the audience, but Captain Nemo watched me intently the whole time. I tried not to look at him too often, fearing I may have been overconfident in my choice of song. I did, however, notice that Kumar was watching the Captain more than he was me, a slight smile playing on his lips. Once I finished, the crew demanded I continue, but this time I put forward a demand in return. 

“Very well, but you will have to join in this time, I feel ridiculous singing all by myself!” A chorus to the sound of ‘no, nonsense’, and ‘you wouldn’t want to hear us’ broke out, but I crossed my arms, and insisted. 

“Come now, you all sounded lovely at New Years!” When they still weren’t convinced, I made them a compromise. 

“What if you only had to sing one line, in a key of your choosing, the whole time? I’ll do the heavy lifting,” I said, flexing my bicep, which earned me a laugh. 

“You see, I prefer some accompaniment,” I continued, daring a glance at the Captain, and couldn’t help but let my eyes linger at his warm smile. Composing myself, I got stared. 

“All you have to sing is this;” I sang the chorus from The lion sleeps tonight , since it was by far the easiest one I could think of. No musical or language barriers could be in the way of everyone joining in for that , surely. I was correct, and the room filled with a mixture of baritone, bass and tenor voices. It didn’t sound too bad at all. Stopping them with a gesture, I smiled excitedly.

“Lovely, gentlemen. Just follow along when I start up on the chorus!” I thanked my lucky star when I hit the high notes perfectly, before the crew joined in. As they continued on when I started the first verse, I think they were quite impressed, both with the song and with themselves. Before long, they were smiling, and nodding along to the beat, some clapping their hands. Before singing the last lines, I held up my hands for them to quiet, which they did instantly. 

Hush, my darling, don't fear, my darling

The lion sleeps tonight

The room was silent for a second, before thunderous applause and cheers broke out, and I was thrilled to finally be able to join in this time. The men were shaking hands, congratulating each other, dunking backs, and laughing. I was filled with sadness for a moment, thinking what existence they must be used to for one little song to give them such joy. My thoughts were interrupted by a voice next to me.

“Well done, Eleonora.” Meeting the Captain’s eyes, I smiled, and felt myself blushing slightly. I cleared my throat, and feeling uncomfortable being praised such, I tried to wave it off.

“Oh, I only tricked them when I said I’d do the heavy lifting. They sounded phenomenal.”

“I don’t agree with your first statement, miss,” he said in a serious tone, but with a humorous glint in his eyes. Not knowing how to respond to his compliment, I was thankful when a voice addressed me from the next table over.

“Señorita, Javier asks, is it only the lion sleeping, or also the jaguar?” I saw the man who had spoken sat next to the large South American, and the whole end of that table were watching me with grins on their faces. With feigned worry, I answered him;

“Oh no, the jaguars are very much awake, I’m afraid. You ought to be careful, Javier.” When his friend had translated for him, Javier pretended to be scared, clutching his heart. We all laughed at his mockery of his brush with death, although I suppose it was quite dark, despite being many years ago. I had to take into account that these were sailors, albeit under unusual circumstances, and I wondered what jokes they told in the language I did not understand.

Chapter Text

After the great success of the sing-along, I rejected any further requests, and jumped down from the table. For the rest of the evening, I was sat in conversations with my table mates. Jakub kindly contented himself with mostly listening, since he could not join in when we spoke in English. Sometimes, he would interject something in Nautilese, and Kumar would translate between us. Jakub was a good-humoured man as well, if slightly less boisterous than Kumar, and I could see why they would make a good couple. The Captain clearly had no issues whatsoever with their arrangement, and I had to give him credit for being genuine when he’d said he’d left ‘civilised’ society behind. I could not help but wonder about what I’d seen in the lounge between him and the professor, and continue my musings from that moment. If there was any truth to it, I wondered if it should not be Aronnax sitting here right now, rather than myself? 

“Have you finally tired of us, Madam?” Kumar interrupted my thinking with his joke, as I must have looked sullen, and I smiled gratefully.

“Yes, indeed, I’m having a dreadful time. No one seems to be practicing their dancing at all, and I wonder what my efforts were for!” I joked back, and he laughed in his raucous way. 

"Patience, Madam, we are too slow to learn more than one form of art at a time,” he said, referring to tonight’s singing. 

“I see. Well, I do hope there will be another cause for celebration soon, so that you may have a chance to practice.” 

“Circe, your feasts will be the death of us all. I say there’s been more of them in the last month than the previous two years combined!” The Captain interjected, and I shook my head. In an admonishing tone, I addressed both him and Kumar;

“Enough already! If you will not tell me who Circe is, then I am not in on the joke, and what you’re doing is simply bullying!” Instead of apologising, the men looked at each other with a knowing smile. I was frustrated beyond belief at this point. 

“Gentlemen, if that is to be the case, I think I shall be off to bed.” I started to rise, but was stopped by a hand gripping my wrist. 

“Please, miss, forgive us. We will stop.” The Captain looked at me earnestly, and I frowned, looking from him to Kumar, but his touch placated me. I sank down on my chair again.

“I did not say you had to stop. I said I needed to be in on the joke as well, if you won’t,” I replied, still indignant. Kumar gave the Captain a questioning look, but was met by a stern gaze.

“We will stop, Madam,” he repeated. Not quite the outcome I had hoped for, I was very curious as to what they meant, but I had given them the option not to tell me.

“Very well. I still might go to bed, if it’s all the same to you,” I said, in a more placid tone. At first, it looked as though the Captain would object, but instead said graciously;

“Will you allow me to escort you to your cabin, miss Larsson?” I wished I’d had the strength to refuse his offer, but the thought of spending a few more moments alone with him was too tempting. I nodded, and tried not to seem too eager.

“Thank you, Captain.” Kumar watched me, and I could see him trying to suppress a grin. He whispered something to Jakub, who laughed, and I shot them both an angry glance. The feeling of being in a high school cafeteria returned, and I was quite glad to leave, especially considering who I was leaving with. 

We walked in silence at first, arm in arm, a slight tension from the quarrel still in the air. I was the one to break it.

“Do you ever dine in the mess hall, sir, or is your food taken to your stateroom, same as ours?” I asked, meaning me and my companions. 

“I will dine in the mess hall on occasion, such as when I have things to discuss with my crew, but often I am busy with work, and find it more effective to have dinner at my desk.” 

“I take it I may not ask what work you are referring to?”

He smiled slightly, looking down at the floor. 

“You may ask, but I will not answer.”

I huffed a little.

“As expected, sir. May I ask another question?” 

“Go on.”

We had reached my door, and I was elated when I noticed he did not seem in a rush to leave. 

“You never did tell me when your thirtieth birthday is.”

Now it was his turn to huff.

“You never told me yours.” 

“Yes I did.”

He raised his eyebrows. 

“A hundred and fifty-nine years from now?”

At this point, having realised it did not matter what I said, my story was too wild to be guessed, I simply nodded innocently. 

“Why will you not tell me?” he implored.

“Because I asked you first.”

He scoffed, still smiling.

“I can assure you, my thirtieth birthday has come and gone.”

“With all due respect, Captain, I guessed as much,” I said, with a coy smile. He laughed at my impertinence.

“And yours?”

“Has not, sir,” I answered, not admitting any more than he was.

“I guessed as much.”

He was stood so close, gazing down into my eyes, and I could not have looked away had I wanted to. I could smell the sea breeze on his clothes, tinged with the pleasant, masculine scent of his body. His eyes were gleaming, a slight smile still playing on his lips. They looked so soft… 

“You must be tired, miss,” he said quietly, and it took me several seconds to process that he’d spoken to me.

“I’m- yes, excessively. I should go to bed,” I said, my voice sounding dreamy. His dark eyes flashed dangerously, and I could feel my breath hitch. Suddenly, he looked away, and the spell was broken. 

“I bid you good night, miss Larsson,” he said, bowing to me, then quickly walking off towards his stateroom. I had not even managed to compose myself enough to answer.

Chapter Text

Despite my mind being occupied by all the impressions from the previous day, January 8th came with its fare share of distractions. I had come up to the platform in search of professor Aronnax, desperately wanting to ask this avid historian if he might know who Circe was. The only clue Captain Nemo had given me so far was that I should have known, on account of my father’s occupation. Unfortunately, like most children, I’d found my parents work the most boring subject in existence, and had rarely listened too intently. This was not the first time I’d cursed myself for it. I also cursed the lack of internet aboard the Nautilus . As I ascended the hatch, I did find the professor and Conseil there, and they seemed in ecstasy over some find, but I also found the Papuan natives not far from our vessel. I don’t know how I’d managed to forget that little detail of our current situation. Just then, the professor cried out, and I watched Conseil take aim and shoot at one of the natives! I thought at first Pierre must be hurt, but then heard him berate Conseil. Soon though, the situation worsened, as we saw the Papuans approach in canoes. 

“Professor, Conseil! Come downstairs at once!” I did not need to tell them twice, and me and Aronnax rushed together to find the Captain and tell him of the impending danger. Finding the salon empty, Aronnax ventured to knock at the door to the Captain’s stateroom. 

“Entrez!” came the reply, and I subconsciously noted that Captain Nemo must have anticipated that it was the professor knocking, since he answered in French. Did that mean Aronnax often knocked on his door, I thought, absent-mindedly. As I looked over his shoulder, I found an austere room, with none of the fine furnishings from the common areas aboard the submarine. Finding its temperate inhabitant sat at his desk, I saw a spread of complicated, algebraical calculations on it that he was working on. If that was what his work consisted of, then he might as well have told me of it in detail last night, since I would not have understood one iota. My skills in maths extended as far as calculating the percentage off of a sale item. While I’d been studying the interior of the room, Aronnax had relayed the impending danger outside, and the Captain now switched to English to tell us that the hatch was closed. After assuring us that the natives posed no danger to us aboard the Nautilus whatsoever, he spoke of them with great compassion. I thought again that, considering the times, he did truly have a very open mind. Having completed our mission, we went to leave, when the Captain surprised us by inviting us to sit down in his room. We did so, both a bit hesitant, and, I think, once again thankful for each other’s presence. Captain Nemo was in a very good mood, and asked the professor of yesterday’s expedition to the island. He did not divulge any of what we had been up to onboard while they were away. They then spoke of the French navigator Dumont d’Urville, who had apparently run aground in this exact location. I knew the name, but could not add anything to the discussion. When it was mentioned that this same navigator had attempted travel to the South Pole, I almost said something of the Terra Nova expedition, but realised it would not take place for another near half century, so I kept my mouth shut. Aronnax seemed delighted to speak to the Captain on this subject, and I was happy to just watch the two of them, a slight smile on my face. The latter arose, and declared that the Nautilus would float free at twenty minutes to three the next day. We left him to his work, but once in the lounge, I stopped the professor. I gestured for him to come with me into the library, and he did so with a puzzled look. Taking every precaution, I shut the door before asking him;

“Professor, you have great deal of historical knowledge, do you not?”

“Uh, oui, mademoiselle, un peu.” Modest as always, this man could recite historical events with dates and names as precise as if he was reading them from a book. I looked at him intently as I put forward the question which had been on my mind for over a week at this point.

“Sir, can you then tell me, who Circe was? Is she some historical figure?” He looked a bit perplexed. 

“Chérie, I would have assumed your knowledge of ancient history was better than mine, with your father an expert…” I rolled my eyes.

“No, he only had time to teach me about batteries, unfortunately. So, you do know who she is?” 

“Bien-sûr, she is a witch from greek mythology, in some accounts a sea nymph.” Frowning, I wondered which iteration Captain Nemo had had in mind when comparing me to her. Considering the rest of his reference, I concluded it must the the former. Slightly irritated, I continued my questioning.

“And she turns men into swine?” 

“From what I remember, mademoiselle, not men in general, but Odysseus’s men.” My eyes widened, suddenly understanding what the joke had been. Aronnax continued; 

“When they come to her island of Aeaea, she invites his crew to a feast, but the food has been poisoned, and they are turned into swine.” I crossed my arms, quite offended that this was the ruthless allegation the Captain had made. I was also a little impressed by the clever reference, but would of course never admit as much. So it was as I had initially suspected, he thought I was a bad influence on the crew. Fine then, if he didn’t want them to have any fun, then I would not be the one instigate any more parties. Besides, I didn’t see how it was my fault in the first place. Kumar had come to find me the first time, and invited me despite the Captain’s objections. The second time was perhaps a little bit my fault, thinking about it. But Kumar had said it was a good idea, and had been the one to arrange the whole New Years feast! The third time, only yesterday, I had absolutely had no part in, the crew had had a rare day off and enjoyed it in the mess hall, I had simply been present. Again, having been invited by Kumar. I did not see why he was not at least as much to blame as myself, if there really was blame to be dealt out!

“Thank you, professor, for enlightening me!” He may have tried to say something in reply, but I had already stormed off to my cabin.

Chapter Text

After sulking in bed, I had resolved to confront the Captain at the next opportunity, feeling that he truly had been unfair this time. I considered going to the mess hall for dinner, but was not in a good enough mood to socialise. As night came, I started hearing frightening noises from up above. The Papuans were screaming, and banging on the hull, trying to get inside. Fair enough, we had trespassed in their home first. Still, it reminded me too much of the most terrifying thing to ever happen to me. I do not like to talk about it, but I have PTSD from a violent home invasion, that took place about a year before I was transported here. Shaking, I tried to ignore the feeling, but it was impossible. When it got too bad, I rushed out from my cabin. Feeling I could really do with some calming substance, I headed for the library to have a cigar. Lighting it with trembling hands, I heard music coming from the lounge. Not from the organ, but from a guitar. I opened the door, and found Ned playing a somber tune, singing;

We've been tenting tonight on the old camp ground,

Thinking of days gone by,

Of the loved ones at home,

That gave us the hand,

And the tears that said, "goodbye"

As he finished, I clapped gently, cigar in mouth. He spun around, but relaxed when he saw me.

“Oh, it’s you.”

“It is.” 

“What’s wrong? Can’t sleep?” I think I must have looked dreadful, my eyes darting about the room, and I was shaking slightly. Before I could think what to answer, he nodded solemnly.

“You’re scared.” With the intention of denying it, I heard my voice say;

“Yes.” He tilted his head.

“Come here,” he said, patting the sofa. I walked over on my swaying legs, and flopped down next to him. 

“Don’t you trust your Captain Nemo anymore?” I closed my eyes, and shook my head with a joyless smile. 

“It’s not that. I just…” I couldn’t, and didn’t want to, talk to him of my trauma, so I shook my head again. 

“You need a drink?” Sometimes I truly loved Ned Land. I had no time to answer before he was up, getting the bottles. He pushed a glass into my hand, and I took a big gulp. Coughing a bit, I raised my eyebrows to him. He was grinning.

“You looked like you needed it strong.” I shrugged, nodding, and took another gulp. 

“Did something happen?” His tone was quite serious. 

“No, no… Or, well, it did, but a long time ago.” ‘Or rather, some hundred and fifty years into the future, actually’. He nodded, downed his own drink in one go, before playing another tune. Listening to him was very relaxing, and his voice really was quite good. He finished the song, and asked me;

“You don’t play, then? You only sing?” 

“Yup. Never had the patience to learn anything else.” 

“Come on now, it’s not that hard. I’m not saying you’ll ever be as good as me, but you might be able to pluck out a tune or two.” I laughed. He was so easy to talk to, and I was thankful I’d found him in here tonight. Pushing the guitar into my lap, he put his arms around me, positioning my hands correctly. I looked over my shoulder, and met his blue eyes only inches from mine. My mouth fell open a little bit, and his smile lines became visible as he grinned slyly. 

“Now, focus, your highness,” he whispered. “You know this one, it’s easy.”

With his hands on top of mine, he showed me the first chord, and we started playing. 

Now don’t you remember sweet Betsy from Pike

Who crossed the big mountains with her lover Ike

Two yoke of oxen a big yeller dog

A tall Shanghai rooster and one spotted hog

It was slow work, but we got through the first verse, all while laughing. 

“Now, it’s just the same four chords over again, the whole song through.” He let me go, and I felt I missed the warmth of his strong body around mine, and the feeling of his deep voice reverberating against me. I don’t think I did a very good job of not showing my feelings, for he grinned again, looking pleased with himself. I looked away, and cleared my throat. I gave the chorus a try, but it was painfully slow, until I was eventually laughing at my own ineptness. I handed the guitar back to him.

“Ned, my fingers hurt!”

“Oh, dear, her highness has too dainty fingers to pluck a guitar?” I shrieked in mock outrage, and kicked his leg, while he laughed at me. 

“I’m not the one claiming to be royalty, mr. King of Harpooners!” He put his hands up in a disarming gesture, and I grinned back at him.

“Well, then, your Majesty , show me what your fingers can do!” His eyes glinted dangerously at me, but I did not back down. I was in deep water now, but I did not want to stop. Not yet. He looked down, and finishing another glass, started showing off properly. Playing at a breakneck speed, he started singing;

Well, Old Dan Tucker, was a fine old man,

Washed his face in a frying pan

Combed his hair with a wagon wheel

And died with a toothache in his heel

I gaped at him, before my mouth turned into a wide grin. This was Bruce Springsteen! I love this song! Well, clearly it had been around before The Boss, but I knew it all the same. I joined in for the chorus, wild with glee. 

Get out the way! Old Dan Tucker,

You're too late to get your supper.

Get out the way! Old Dan Tucker,

You're too late to get your supper.

I jumped up, and started dancing around. Ned got up too, looking almost like a rock star, the way he was playing. When the song finished, I shouted ‘again!’ and he threw his head back with a laugh, starting over. I was headbanging, and played along on an air guitar. Ned was howling at me, I must have looked ridiculous, but I was having so much fun. 

Chapter Text

Finishing the song a second time, we both fell onto the sofa, exhausted, but absolutely roaring with laughter. He put his arm around me, pulling me close, and kissed the top of my head.

“Damn, you are something, your highness.” Smiling, I turned to him, and his face was so close. My smile faded, and I looked into his eyes. I’ll never know what would have happened, had we not been interrupted by a deep voice, dripping with ice.

“Miss Larsson, mr. Land, I must insist you keep it down. It is late.” We both whipped around to find Captain Nemo, leaning against the door to his room. My heart sank, and Ned’s face turned to stone. 

“Sorry, Captain, but the lady was scared, needed some cheering up,” he said, with obvious contempt. “Seems she doesn’t quite trust your steel cylinder to keep her safe.”

I turned to him, mortified.

“Ned! That’s not…” Ignoring both me and the Canadian’s snide comment, Nemo glared at him, and asked sarcastically;

“And you’re the man to cheer her up, mr. harpooner?” Now it was Ned’s turn to glare.

“Seems so. I did a fine job, if I say so myself. Didn’t I, your highness?” he asked me, squeezing the arm I realised was still around me, to my great horror. My eyes wide, I looked between him and the Captain, but the Captain would still not look at me. He took a step forward, and Ned Land jumped up. What was happening? My head was spinning, and I could not get a grip on myself. I saw Nemo take a look at the half-empty bottles on the table, and then look back at Ned. Switching to French, he said something in an angry voice to the Canadian. Ned took a few steps towards him, replying in a fierce tone. I could not catch a single word, my brain would simply not cooperate. Captain Nemo seemed to compose himself, and was once again his superior, relaxed self. With a sneer, he made another comment, and I saw Ned go pale with rage. For a second, I was sure he would attack the Captain, a fight I would not have been able to guess the outcome of. Instead, he grabbed the guitar, and stormed out the room. I was still completely dumbstruck, and could not form a single coherent thought in my head. Finally, the Captain looked at me, with a blank expression. Meeting his eyes, I don’t know how I managed to, but asked him in a whisper;

“What did you say to him?” He sneered back.

“Nothing undeserved.” I stared at him, having no idea what that could mean, but judging from Ned’s reaction, it had not been kind. To my surprise, Nemo did not leave, but started pacing the room.

“How can you stand that man?!” the Captain exclaimed, exasperated. In the bizarre situation, I think I went into some sort of zen mode, looking at one of the beautiful paintings on the wall. I answered him, perfectly calm;

“Funny you should say that. He asked me the same thing about you once.” Nemo’s gaze must have been shooting daggers at this, I could feel the intensity of it, despite not looking at him. The situation had already gone to complete shit, so I might as well take Nemo’s normal approach, and act unphased. I shrugged, and answered the question plainly.

“I like him. He’s charming, and uncomplicated,” I said, with certain emphasis on the last word.

“Exactly, he’s so simple! How could you possibly find him amusing, you are nothing alike!” I scoffed, and thought of Ned using the exact same reasoning.

“Actually, I’m a bit of a social chameleon, I can enjoy the company of many different types of people, and adjust my personality accordingly,” I said, matter of factly, without looking away from the painting. I could feel the Captain staring at me all the same.

“And you consider this frivolity a virtue?” Not acknowledging the insult, I said frankly;

“I would say so, yes. It has served me well in life.”

“Indeed? How, exactly, if I may ask?” he said in his sarcastic tone. ‘Fine, I’ll bite’, I thought. Finally looking up at him, I said with an edge of sharpness;

“Well, for instance, I don’t mind spending my time with a sullen recluse who won’t even tell me his name.” Check-mate, and we both knew it. He stared at me, enraged that he could not retort, and turned on his heel to leave, when I blurted out;

“I know who Circe is.” He froze. Bet he didn’t think I’d find out how mean his comments had been.

“The professor told me.” He turned around, slowly, before opening his mouth.

“And… are you upset?” he asked, an unusual uncertainty in his voice, but his face had returned to its normal, calm appearance. I arose, and came up to him.

“Yes! I resent the allegation, sir. I am not a witch, and as I’ve said before, the crew have all been perfect gentlemen.” He rolled his eyes, and looked exasperated. 

“You think that, because you do not understand what they are saying in our language.” I raised my eyebrows.

“And do you really think I would be shocked at their words? Me? Either way, their actions speak louder than words, and those have been nothing but gracious and courteous.”

“I am pleased to hear it, miss,” he said, voice indifferent, but I felt as though I was missing some important point. Frustrated, I continued;

“Kumar has had just as much part in this as I have! And besides, it’s not even a very good analogy. Calling me a maenad would have been more accurate.” Now it was his turn to raise his eyebrows. Hesitantly he asked me;

“Exactly how much did the professor tell you of Circe, miss?” I frowned. Was there more to tell?

“He said she was a witch, who poisoned Odysseus’s men at a feast so that they turned into pigs.” He stared at me with his piercing gaze, as if trying to read my mind. 

“Ah. And what happened to the poor men?” 

“Oh, uh… We didn’t get that far,” I said, feeling a bit sheepish now, and looked down.

“I see. I suppose we may never know.” I felt like punching him in the gut for being so deliberately obtuse, but when I turned to scold him his face was tortured. All my irritation immediately disappeared, replaced by worry.

“Captain..?” He did not reply.

“Captain, I’m not too upset about it, I understand it was but a joke…” I said, trying to placate him. His face regained its usual composure, but he would not meet my eyes.

“I’m glad to hear it, miss. I’m sorry for any pain it caused.” With those words, he whipped around, and disappeared into his room.

Chapter Text

He left me, stunned as ever. His reaction had been completely unexpected, even for him. I thought he might apologise for antagonising me, but still reprimand me for instigating frivolous behavior among his men. I would have given my reasons for why this admonishment was unfair, and he would have shook his head at me, while smiling fondly. Just as I thought I was starting to understand the man, he changed again. It was exhausting, and I let out a groan of frustration. For a moment, I thought if I should knock on his door, and continue the confrontation, but in all honesty did not know what to say to him. Clearly I’d missed some part of the analogy, and with the professor long since retired, I had but one option if I wanted an answer straight away. I went into the library, in search of a copy of The Odyssey , which I was sure would be there. It was. In the original Greek. I groaned even louder, and even stomped my foot. I tried to see if there was perhaps a lexicon I could use, but of course there wasn’t. Not one. Damn the polyglot Captain and his international crew. I massaged my head, and contemplated waking the professor up, but could not quite justify doing that to the poor man. The noises from outside could still be heard, but luckily they did not bother me as much anymore, especially since I had more important things to focus on. Had I been a more considerate person, one of them might have been Ned Land, who’d been so harshly berated. Unfortunately I am not, and besides, I was annoyed with him for trying to pit me against the Captain. I was annoyed with everything, and everyone at the moment. Ned, for not getting along with the Captain. The Captain, for being so infernally hard to read. The professor for being asleep, Conseil for not speaking English. And the Papuans, for not shutting the hell up. I was annoyed with the library for not providing what I needed, and with the bookshelves for being made of wood. In short, I was not in a good mood. Helping myself to another cigar, since it was the only thing I was currently not averse to, I sat down and sulked. 

Eventually, I think I must have passed out from sheer anger at the world, and I awoke on a sofa in the library. It, as well as the dining room and lounge, was deserted. I wondered what the time was, but realised I could not care less. I went to have a reviving bath. Stepping out of the bathroom after a good hour and a half, I did feel better, if not great. I went to my cabin to change into some fresh clothes, despite them all looking the exact same. My closet looked like it was from The Simpsons . With one notable exception. I shrugged, and opted for the dress instead. If the Captain was so against us having any more parties onboard, I might as well wear it whenever. 

When I came into the lounge, I found the professor there, alone. I was about to ambush him with my questions, but he intercepted me.

“Ah, bonjour, mademoiselle! Je me demande, have you seen the Captain?” I was taken aback by his question at first, thinking he’d heard of last night’s commotion, so answered a bit cautiously.

“Non, monsieur, je suis désolé. Pourquoi?” 

“Ah, for I believe we are about to float off, if his calculations are correct,” he said. I relaxed. It was a bit strange, this dance of languages we were doing, but found it worked fine most of the time. My French was slowly improving, if nowhere near good enough to hold a conversation in, yet. I felt a vibration going through the hull, and realised then that if we were about to break free from the corals, it must mean it was after two o’clock. Had I slept all morning? Granted, it had been very late before I fell asleep. With a cold feeling of embarrassment, I hoped the Captain was still in his room, or he would have walked passed me, asleep in the library. Closing my eyes, I had to take a deep breath. 

“Are you alright, chérie?” Shaking my head, I put a hand on the dear professor’s shoulder, and smiled grimly.

“I think so, mon ami. I was rather hoping you might help me with answering another historical enquiry.” He looked at me, puzzled. I knew I had been acting a bit strange. Before I could ask him the question, Captain Nemo appeared in the lounge. He came in from the library, not from his stateroom, and I had to pretend as if I was not completely mortified at this. I could see him glance at my choice of clothing for the day, but his neutral expression revealed not what his opinion on it was. Without any phrases of greeting, he announced that we were ready to leave. 

“I’ve issued orders to open the hatches.” I paled, all embarrassment gone, and I clutched at the professor’s arm. Was he mad?! The professor seemed to share my thoughts, and asked startled;

“What about the Papuans?” 

“What about them?” Captain Nemo shrugged. He was clearly not in as good a mood today, not that I was surprised, after last night. When Aronnax, perfectly reasonably, asked if they would not come inside, he was met with one of the Captain’s obtuse answers. All credit to the professor, who remained patient, while I felt like screaming at the infuriating individual. He simply assured us that even if the hatches were open, no one could enter the Nautilus if he did not wish them to. Despite usually trusting him, I felt the need to interject. I walked up to him, and pleaded;

“Sir, please, we will be away from here soon. Could we not simply use some air from the tanks in the meantime?” Gazing down on me serenely, he put a hand on my back, and urged us to come with him, so that we would understand what he meant. I was perplexed at his gentle gesture, thinking our first meeting after yesterday would go very differently. Had I not been so anxious over our potential visitors, I would have been exasperated at yet another unexpected reaction from him. 

Waiting by the central companionway was Ned Land and Conseil, along with a group of the crew, who were in the midst of opening the hatches. I clung to the professor, my eyes wide in terror, as we could hear the shouts from outside clearer by the second. Despite the scene unravelling, Ned Land could not help but sneer when we appeared;

“Sleep well, Captain?” Captain Nemo paid him no mind, but looked serene as ever, as the first faces became visible above. They looked at us with hostility, in all right, and only the Captain’s assurances that he did not wish for us to take a single of their lives calmed me. He must be certain there would be no skirmish. As the first man touched the railing, he was instantly flung back by an electrical current. I looked at the Captain disapprovingly, even this could have been easily avoided, had he taken my suggestion. The others looked on, awestruck, and I realised they might not understand what had happened. This was confirmed, when Ned, before I could stop him, went to leap up the companionway, and grabbed the rail. As he was flung back, I saw the Captain give a satisfied smirk, before resuming his serene appearance. I glared at him, the sadist, but he took no notice of me. Not before I bent to help Ned up, along with Conseil. At this, a slight shadow passed over his face, but it was barely noticeable. 

Finally free from the Torres Straight, me and my companions spent the rest of the afternoon in the lounge together. Ned was sullen as ever, and I felt it was not the appropriate time to ask him about the exchange with the Captain last night. Neither did I want to ask the professor my pressing question in the company of the others. In short, it was quite a tense few hours, and I think we were all quite relieved to be off on our own as evening approached. 

Chapter Text

The next morning, I could not find the professor, and assumed he must be in his cabin. I didn’t dare corner him in there, in case the Captain might be next door. I also would rather not wait for him in the salon, for the same reason. I’m not sure why I was so anxious over this small task. Perhaps I subconsciously knew the magnitude of what this piece of information would reveal to me. What I did not know, was how long it would be before this event took place. 

It wasn’t until noon the next day, January 11th, that I managed to get him alone. He came up to the platform, and we sat down together as we often did, watching the serene waters of these coral seas. 

“Professor, I never got the chance to put forward my enquiry the other day.”

“Ah, indeed you did not, mademoiselle. Well, now is the opportune moment.” And so it was.

“You see, I was quite intrigued by what you told me about Circe, and wondered if there is more to the story? What happened to Odysseus’s crew? Were they saved?” He looked slightly uncomfortable, but answered in his best attempt at nonchalance;

“Mais oui, him and his crew left Aeaea, eventually. As men,” he clarified. I furrowed my brows. So what was the big deal?

“Did anything else happen?” The professor kept his gaze firmly on the sea when answering.

“Uh, non, not that I recall.” 

“Not that you recall?” Grasping at straws, I had to ask him;

“You don’t happen to read ancient Greek, do you, professor?” He laughed.

“Non, chérie, désolé!” With those words, he left to continue his work. ‘And there goes my last hope of figuring out this mystery’. Unless I was to threaten Kumar at gunpoint, I suppose. I do hope the man isn’t a mind-reader, for just in that moment, he stepped up onto the platform do to his usual survey. 

“I read ancient Greek, Madam,” he said with an impudent grin, having heard the end of our conversation. I gave him a tired smile.

“I’m sure you do, my friend, however, little good it does me, now, since you won’t share your knowledge regardless.” He had the decency to look sympathetic at this.

“I’m sure all will be revealed in due time, Madam.” I only huffed at him in disbelief. Finishing his task, he came to sit beside me. We were silent for a while, before he spoke up;

“You have not been back to the mess hall, Madam. Did you not enjoy yourself last time?” I pursed my lips, sighing.

“I did, tremendously, actually. They’re good men, your crew. But I wouldn’t want to impose.”

“Impose, Madam? Nonsense!” 

“The Captain thinks so, no? I don’t want to cause any more trouble onboard. Although, it seems inevitable, no matter what I do.” He looked at me with great compassion, I could tell he yet again knew what had transpired. Putting his arm around me, he tried to reassure me;

“Eleonora, I am truly sorry. Your situation is difficult, but please, I assure you, no one is blaming you!” I couldn’t help but laugh bitterly at his accidental turn of phrase.

“No one is blaming me? Yes, thank you, I know he does!” My laugh turned into a sob, and I put my head on his shoulder, feeling utterly hopeless. 

“Oh, Madam, no, no! No crying, please. All will be well,” he said, squeezing me tightly. 

“See, you say that, but every time things take a turn for the better, I ruin it!” I sobbed.

“You have ruined nothing, priya. Please, dry your tears.” He gave me a handkerchief, and I accepted it gratefully. 

“Never mind the Captain, he is a difficult man, but he has his reasons. Trust me, little Rani.” I looked up at him.

“‘Rani’? What’s that?” He smiled at me.

“Little Queen.” I groaned.

“Not you too.” 

“Because you can move in any direction across the board,” he chuckled. 

“The chess game is still on, then?” He laughed, and looked out over the sea with a bitter grin. 

“Always, Madam.” 

“Who’s your opponent?” I asked, desperately wanting a clue to what he was alluding to. He sombered a little at this.

“Circumstances, Madam. And it is a masterful opponent, indeed.” He arose.

“Please, if you feel inclined, come join us in the mess hall. The crew misses you.” With a bow, he went down the hatch. 

Chapter Text

Over the next few days, my wish came true, and things onboard did change for the better, at least in regards to me making friends with the crew. Most days, I would have at least one of my meals in the mess hall, often sitting with Kumar and Jakub, or Thomas and William. Others would join us with less regularity, but the mood was always good. We had all come to a silent understanding, where neither of us asked questions about the other’s past, although I assume the crewmembers knew each other well already. Instead, we’d make safe anecdotes, that didn’t give away anything too specific, or stick to general conversation topics. I’d picked up a few phrases in Nautilese, through translations between my friends, and those of the crew I did not share a language with. Despite the slight limitations, I thought the arrangement worked well, and we all enjoyed each others company. I didn’t understand why they had been so extremely cautious in the beginning. Perhaps there had been some truth in mine and Aronnax’s speculation that they had no interest in getting to know us, at least initially, and I was proud that I’d managed to convince them otherwise. Speaking of Aronnax, I had asked him several times if he would not join me in the mess hall, but he’d looked uncomfortable at the thought, and made polite excuses. Eventually I’d given up. I’d not even bothered with Ned and Conseil in the first place, already anticipating both of their answers. The former would probably rather starve, and that’s saying something, and the latter would have never gone without his master. I received a more obvious explanation to Aronnax’s declining the invitations, when we were sat together in the salon one day. He spoke, with great excitement, of the experiments Captain Nemo had been conducting. He wasn’t able to explain in English exactly what they had been, but he’d partaken in several of them, to his satisfaction. Of course he wouldn’t want to miss out on a single one of these chances, just to come dine with the crew. I tried not be jealous of their relationship, which seemed so uncomplicated, with none of the strange tension that existed between myself and the Captain. Perhaps it was the fact that they could so easily bond over all things scientific, and I knew how much the Captain admired Aronnax’s great knowledge of marine biology. Or perhaps it was the fact that he was a much easier person to get along with than myself. While they’d been busy with their experiments, I’d barely seen the Captain. When I did, he was polite and amiable, but in the way one is with a colleague or acquaintance. I did not get to see his spirited, warm self, and I missed it fiercely. I tried to shake the feelings of bitterness, wanting to be happy for the professor, but was not completely successful. 

Despite this one source of malcontent, I did find myself overall happy. When I was not spending time with my new friends in the mess hall, I would spend it with my old ones in the lounge. As always, gazing out the crystal windows was true euphoria, and seeing things I’d never dreamed to see in real life gave me both joy and purpose. When we were afloat, me and the professor would scour the horizon for whales, and watch them through a spyglass we borrowed from the salon. The life onboard was a far cry from the nine-to-five, rental-flat, commuting life I’d been resigned to at home in my time. More and more, the feeling of gratefulness for being afforded this adventure permeated me. Just sitting together, my three companions and I, was a pleasant way to exist. The professor would sketch the marine life, Conseil take notes, and Ned often pluck at his guitar. I’d be drawing, or reading a book. We had finally settled in. 

On January 18th, the weather was rough, a storm was rising. I found myself alone in the lounge with Ned. As I finished another book, I looked up to see him looking a bit glum. I felt bad for him, for even though I don’t think he was miserable, he was by far the one of us who suffered the most from our situation. Resolving to cheer him up, I smiled, got up from my seat and went over. He looked up with a sad half-smile. In a chipper voice, I asked him;

“Mr. Land, if you’re not busy, would you care to continue my guitar lessons?” He scoffed. 

“You’re not worried I’ll try to get you drunk, to have my way with you?” At first I thought it had been a joke, and went to answer something funny, when I saw that he was serious. My face fell.

“Ned? What do you mean? You know I trust you!” He scoffed again. Putting a firm hand on his shoulder, I looked at him imploringly. He squirmed a little. 

“I know, ma’am, it’s not your fault. Just the Captain’s words.” I froze. 

“Pardon?” My voice was hard. He nodded.

“That’s what he said, that night,” he admitted, finally. I’d not wanted to bring up the topic, since he’d never said anything himself, but upon hearing this I was given no choice.

“He said what?!” Shrugging, although I could see how bothered he was by it, he explained;

“He said that’s what I was doing, you know, in French, so you wouldn’t understand.” I paled with rage, but kept my voice calm.

“And what did you reply?” He squirmed even more at this.

“I said I wouldn’t have to get you drunk, that maybe you wanted to anyway! Beg your pardon, ma’am, it was in the heat of the moment.” Fighting to remain composed, I said icily;

“He said something to you after that. What was it?” He did not reply immediately, and I dug my fingers into his shoulder.

“What was it?” 

“He said you had better options, if that was the case!”

Chapter Text

I am not known as a mild person, exactly. I have always had quite a temper, and could get angry. Really angry. Although, it had been long since I’d been this angry. Ned, well over both six feet tall and two hundred pounds, cowered before me. He hadn’t needed to, my anger was not directed at him. I wasn’t even looking at him. I wasn’t looking at anything. I was pondering his words. Actually, pondering is a meek description for what I was doing. For more than two months, I’d been imprisoned in this damned machine, a hundred and thirty fucking years before I was even born. And for what crime? None! I’d been thrown overboard, locked up, starved, berated, ignored, mocked, and now I’d been accused of being a slut. By the man who was responsible for all the rest. Whom I’d done nothing but be kind and considerate towards. Whom I admired beyond words. I’d not complained once. I’d obeyed every request, and attempted to brighten the life onboard for everyone, despite my circumstances. What had I now gotten in return for my efforts? The Captain saw me as not only a witch, but a whore, who might sleep with just anyone onboard, apparently. That’s what he’d meant by me turning his men into swine. The tears were burning behind my eyes, and I released my death grip on the Canadian’s shoulder with a jerk. I’d deal with him later. For now, all I could think of was finding the Captain, and giving him a very unpleasant piece of my mind. I stormed out of the lounge, racing down the gangway, until I flew straight into Professor Aronnax, almost knocking him down.

“Mademoiselle!”

“Where’s the Captain?!” I shouted in his face. He looked beyond startled, and simply pointed to the companionway from which he’d come. I stormed up it, not hearing his warnings, and saw Captain Nemo and Kumar stood on the platform, in a heated discussion. Kumar aimed a spyglass out to sea, and I saw a ship in the far distance. Not being able to focus on anything but the object of my ire, I shouted;

“Captain Nemo!” They both turned around at the sound of my voice. I walked over to him, completely ignoring Kumar, and shoved a finger in his sternum.

“How dare you!” To my great irritation, my voice broke at the word ‘dare’. 

“Madam, what-” I heard Kumar plead behind me. The Captain looked at me in shock, his eyes burning. 

“You will do as ordered, same as your companions. I will not have you-” Not really in a state to contemplate his words, they just made me angrier.

“I will do nothing you order! You will not speak to me like that, after what you did!” He frowned, in confusion and frustration. 

“What I did? It has not happened yet, you insolent-”

“Insolent? Me?! Don’t you dare-” He grabbed my arms, his face contorted in anger, and forced me towards the companionway. 

“Let me go, you brute!” I was kicking and screaming, but he held me in a death grip.

“Dakkar!” Kumar exclaimed, and Nemo whipped around. The look on his face made his chief officer pale, and silence. Nemo didn’t say another word, but wrangled me down the hatch, towards my cabin. I was hurling insults at him, fighting him with all I was worth, but I was no match for the furious Captain. He managed to open the door, and pushed me down onto my bed, not releasing the iron grip on my arms. His face just inches from mine, I thought my heart would stop.

“Stay.” His voice was heated, his eyes blazing. With that one word, he swung around, and I heard the door lock behind him. 

I’m not sure what outcome I’d hoped for. In truth, I may not have thought that far ahead. Regardless of what I might have imagined, this was not it. As soon as I’d recovered somewhat, my anger came back, and I flew up. Banging on the door, I was screaming my lungs out, before I heard footsteps rushing down the gangway. I half expected it to be the Captain, come back for round two, but they walked right passed my cabin. Then I could hear more footsteps, and shouting. Confused, I quieted, and listened intently. All this commotion could not be because of me, surely? I heard the hatches being shut, and could feel the Nautilus gaining speed. What was happening? The noises outside died down, and the whole interior of the ship seemed to brim with anxious anticipation. Suddenly, there was a jolt, and I lost my balance. I caught myself with my hand, and felt a pain shoot up from my wrist. Fuck. Before I had time to think of something more eloquent, I was interrupted by a squeaking, scratching sound from outside the hull. It continued all along our ship, from bow to stern, before ceasing. I was sat on the floor, massaging my wrist, in absolute bewilderment.

Chapter Text

I was laying on my bed, staring at the ceiling, contemplating what the hell had happened. It had all gone by so quickly, from Ned’s confession, to the fight with the Captain, to the collision. I wondered how it could have happened, the sea had laid open, apart from that one ship in the distance. Had it perhaps been another mission to hunt down the monster, same as the Abraham Lincoln, and attacked us? Had the Captain felt the need to incapacitate it, same as he had us that time? I wished I hadn’t been so upset, for I couldn’t exactly remember what the Captain had said to me. I couldn’t remember everything I’d said either, but I knew it was nothing pleasant. What was I thinking? I cursed my temper, not for the first time. There was no way this could end well after how I’d acted. Then again, what did it matter, now that I knew the Captain’s true opinion of me. Around dinnertime, I heard the door unlock, and Oskar came in with my usual tray. He seemed jittery, and only glanced at me quickly, before exiting the room. He did not lock the door again, I noted, and I wondered if it was on purpose or not. Outside, I could hear the normal tranquility of the ship’s gangways disturbed by quick footsteps, and rushed voices hurrying past. I could not make out who they belonged to, or what they were saying in the secret language. I wondered what exactly had taken place, and what predicaments had arisen from the event. Not feeling quite ready to face whatever, or whoever was out there, I sat down to have my dinner, although my lack of appetite made it difficult. After finishing about half of it, I pushed the tray away, and picked up a book from the shelves above my desk. I found it hard to focus on the page, and had to reread the same paragraph over and over, before I felt my eyelids getting heavy. Strange, I thought, since I was still in a very anxious state, but had no more time to question my reaction before I fell asleep, still sat at the desk. 

Waking, however, I found myself soundly tucked into bed. I felt clear-headed, and sitting up, I noticed I was still in my clothes. As I massaged my wrist, which felt a little better already, I thought back on what had happened before I so unceremoniously fell asleep. The events of what must have been yesterday seemed a dream, and I could not quite fathom the fact that they weren’t, and even less begin to think what they meant for the future. Even after splashing my face with cold water, I felt I needed some fresh air to calm the anxiety that was once again rising within. My door still unlocked, I headed up to the platform, and found my companions there. Ned looked slightly uncomfortable at the sight of me, but I couldn't care less about our quarrel at this moment. The professor looked relieved to see me, and came up to embrace me. 

“Chérie, oh, I was worried for you! What were you thinking, confronting the Captain of his actions, like that?” he admonished me, and I looked at him, bewildered. Pushing him away slightly, I said indignantly;

“I believe I had every right, sir, if perhaps I am questioning my own methods in hindsight.” 

“But mademoiselle, I’m sure you remember, this was the condition for us being taken aboard the Nautilus! I may not agree either, but what choice do we have?” I stared at him in absolute disbelief. At this point, Ned piped up;

“I think you two might be talking about different things, here.” A confusing, and at times heated discussion followed, but in the end I think we had made sense of things, more or less. It seemed I had decided to confront the Captain at the most inopportune moment, as he had just ordered that his four passengers were to be placed in confinement. That’s what he’d thought I had challenged him on, and the ensuing conflict made more sense. What did not make sense, was what had happened after. The collision had clearly been intentional then, and Ned cursed violently that we had missed the opportunity to make our escape. As he put it, ‘any enemy of Captain Nemo is a friend of mine’. The professor assured him that it would not have been a viable option, since me must assume the ship had been damaged as badly as the Abraham Lincoln. I was outraged to learn that my friends had yet again been drugged, and even more so when I realised that I had been too! Successfully, this time. Add that to the list of the Captain’s crimes against me, which I was still determined to make him answer for. 

Despite putting together our different pieces of the puzzle, we were not really able to conclude any more than we already knew: that there were some goings on aboard the Nautilus that we were not privy to. However, this “mission”, as they referred to it, was perhaps at a grander scale than we had previously imagined. Ned’s words of Captain Nemo’s enemies made me think, perhaps his ties with the surface were not so severed as he would make it seem. Adding Aronnax’s information, of what had taken place on the platform before I entered it, made it obvious that Kumar had identified the ship as hostile before it had a chance to attack. I could no longer dismiss the incident as being the same circumstances as what had happened with the Abraham Lincoln. No, the Nautilus’s mission was more than scientific, and the reason it was being kept from us did not bode well for it being of a peaceful nature. Could I have misjudged the men onboard so completely? Was there a nefarious reason they had had to leave society behind? I was normally a good judge of character, but perhaps my skills only applied to people of the 21st century. Still, I could not consolidate myself with the thought of them being anything but good men, and vowed to not make my mind up until I had the full story.

Chapter Text

I could not bear spending any more time alone with my thoughts, so stayed close to Professor Aronnax as he went into the lounge to continue his usual studies. Ned, much embarrassed after being scolded by myself and the professor for his impudent comment to the Captain regarding me, stayed in his cabin with Conseil. It’s not that I was necessarily so angry at the implication itself, as the fact that he’d made it, considering I knew how fragile a woman’s reputation was in this age. The professor had been furious with Ned, as furious as the gentle man could get, and shocked and disappointed at the Captain’s retort. I hated to come between them, but was still warmed by his consideration for me. With this in mind, you might imagine the tension we felt as Captain Nemo entered the lounge where we were sat. I felt myself freeze at the impending confrontation, but it never came. The Captain looked absolutely dreadful, his eyes red from lack of sleep, his face worn from worry, and he paced about the room, not seeming to notice us. We stayed where we were, watching him flit about, finding no repose. Finally, he came up to the professor, and I understood he asked him if he was a doctor of medicine. At first, Aronnax seemed to stunned to understand the question, and he asked it again. The professor gave an affirmative answer, and I think he said he’d worked at the hospital for many years. I did not understand the Captain’s next words, but the professor asked if he ‘had somebody sick’. Receiving confirmation of this, he was asked to go with the Captain, and they disappeared together. I was left with my book and my thoughts, but the book was completely forgotten in favour of the latter. Had this something to do with the collision yesterday, or was there an illness spreading onboard? And more importantly, who might be the victim? I had not been in my musings for ten minutes before the professor reappeared. 

“What happened?” He did not answer me, his countenance ashen, and said instead;

“The Capitaine is asking for you, mademoiselle.” We exchanged a look, and he put a hand on my shoulder, before giving me the directions. I felt cold with fear for the coming meeting, but I was wrong again. As I came down the set of stairs leading to the level below, I heard murmured voices and soft sobs coming from an open door to the left. I approached it carefully, my stomach twisting, a lump forming in my throat. The men gathered in the cabin moved aside for me, all looking harrowed, some crying quietly. On one of the beds laid a man, pale and serene, with a bandage wrapped around his head. Next to him was Captain Nemo on a chair, and William, at the foot of the bed. The latter got up when he saw me, tears were streaming down his face, but he urged me forward. I felt petrified, couldn’t quite grasp what was happening, but went up to the bed all the same. It was only then that I recognised the dying man. Thomas. My kind, gentle friend, who’d been so warm and welcoming, always endeavouring to include me at every chance he got. Who’d loved my singing. I sank down on the bed, and took his hand with my right, the left one wrapped to avoid further injury to my wrist. 

“Thomas?” I whispered, and felt the first tears run down my cheeks. He met my eyes with a glassy stare, his face spasming now and again. He moved his lips as if to say something, and I smiled through the tears, nodding. I sang gently, my voice quivering all the same;

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine

I keep my eyes wide open all the time

I keep the ends out for the tie that binds

Because you're mine, I walk the line, mmm

I find it very, very easy to be true

I find myself alone when each day is through

Yes, I'll admit that I'm a fool for you

Because you're mine, I walk the line, mmm

As sure as night is dark and day is light

I keep you on my mind both day and night

And happiness I've known proves that it's right

Because you're mine, I walk the line, mmm

Before I was halfway through the third verse, his eyes were dimming, and by the next one, they closed completely. William sank down to his knees next to the bed. I kept on singing, finishing the song, before covering my mouth with my hands. William reached up, and putting a hand on Thomas’s cheek, said quietly;

“Go, my brother, go home to Isabelle. She’s waiting for you.” I closed my eyes, sobbing quietly, before I felt a hand on my knee. As I opened them, I saw William looking at me, his usually cheerful eyes full of grief. I could hold back to longer, and threw my arms around him. We cried together on the floor, and I saw the crew in the door embracing, comforting each other, but there was no comfort to be found. Thomas was dead. 

Chapter Text

We all stayed there a long time, before some of the men started to drop off, but not before coming up to Thomas to say their goodbyes. Soon there were but half a dozen of us left, including myself, William and the Captain. He’d remained seated alone on the chair, his head in his hands, sobbing silently. Whatever anger I’d had towards him was washed away by seeing him in such anguish. I finally arose to leave, and putting a hand to William’s cheek, I bent to kiss his forehead. He squeezed my hand before letting it go. I walked away on stiff legs, my mind dazed, my crying ceased. As I walked up the first step of the lower staircase, I heard a voice call me.

“Miss Larsson?” I stopped, but did not turn around. Footsteps came up behind me. 

“Eleonora?” I took a deep breath before facing him. Surely he could not mean to confront me now, not after what had just happened. Captain Nemo gazed at me, intense grief etched on his noble countenance. He seemed as if he wasn’t sure what to say at first, but then uttered a simple phrase;

“Thank you.” I sighed, in relief and compassion, and took his hands in mine. 

“I’m so sorry, Captain.” Looking at me, his face softened slightly, before he gazed down.

“You are hurt.” I looked down at my bandaged hand as well. 

“Only a sprained wrist, sir.” 

“You did not stay, as I asked?” ‘Asked’ was a gentle description for the way in which he’d said this, pressing me down on the bed with his iron grip. Our eyes met again, and I was too drained to summon any emotion whatsoever.

“Did you think I would?” The corner of his mouth twitched.

“I hoped.” 

“And Thomas? How…” My voice broke, I could not finish my question. His face turned hard, I could see him trying to fight the tears returning.

“One of the engine levers cracked in the collision. Had Thomas not leapt in front, it would have struck Kumar.” I felt the blood draining from my face, and dizzied. I had not seen Kumar in the room. Captain Nemo guessed my thoughts.

“He is unharmed.” I closed my eyes, thanking whatever powers may be that I had not lost another friend. When I opened them, I saw the Captain studying me. Before I knew what was happening, he pulled me close, and held me. I could feel him put his face to my head, sighing deeply. We stood embracing for several seconds, and his warmth filled me in body and spirit, before he let me go. He gazed at me again, his face unreadable, before he walked off down the gangway. A group of four crewmen passed him, with grim expressions, carrying a large piece of cloth towards Thomas’s cabin. 

As I walked by the open hatch on the way to my cabin, I heard a voice from above.

“Nautron respoc lorni virch.” I stopped. It was late afternoon, not at all when Kumar would usually take his survey of the horizon. I walked up onto the platform, and saw him sitting down, facing the water, his shoulders slumping. 

“Kumar?” I called gently. He took no notice of me. I walked up to him.

“Kumar, may I sit down?” He made a small gesture with his hand, and I sank down next to him.

“Is he dead?” he asked, voice cold. I did not know how to answer the blunt question, and took too long.

“Is he dead?” he asked again, fervently. He turned his face to me, and must have read the reply in my expression. He turned back to the sea.

“It should have been me.” I put a hand on his shoulder, but he shook it off.

“It should have been me!” he shouted, and threw his spyglass into the water with a loud splash. He started sobbing.

“You were right to try and stop us, Madam! What are we doing? Have we not lost enough already? Are we to also lose each other, and even ourselves?” he lamented, before rising, and disappearing down the hatch. 

Chapter Text

It was late, but I could not sleep. Things had changed so drastically in such little time. Only yesterday morning I had been in a state of serene content with my situation onboard, but now it felt a lifetime ago. I got up, and threw on my dress, I couldn't be bothered with anything that took longer to put on. I needed to move about, and the cabin’s walls felt as though they were closing in on me. I saw that the hatches were closed, we must be submersed, so I paced the gangway back and forth. Before I knew it, I found myself on the lower level, despite not having made the conscious decision to go here. I walked past the door to Thomas’s cabin, closed now, and there was not a sound to be heard anywhere in the ship. I felt so terribly alone, as if I were the last person on Earth, and desperately longed for some company. Soon, I was outside the door to the mess hall, and I opened it on instinct. The room was lit up, and inside was almost the whole crew, sat around the tables, nursing their drinks in silence. A few faces looked up to greet me, but it was a far cry from what the mood usually was in the room. I went over to the serving table, and helped myself to a drink as well, before sitting down at the nearest free chair. None of my usual companions were there, not Kumar and Jakub, not William, and not Thomas… I took a big gulp of the drink, and sighed deeply. The man next to me, I didn’t know his name, we’d never spoken, patted my back. I smiled grimly at him, and squeezed his hand. I saw similar gestures across the room, and apart from a few words spoken here and there, we sat in silence. Sometimes, a new face would appear, and follow the same procedure I had. I’m not sure how much time had passed, but I’d gone to refill mine and my table mate’s drinks twice, when the door opened. In stepped the Nautilus’s commander, his chief officer, and the giant Jakub, with his arm firmly around Kumar’s shoulders. They all looked stoic, with somber expressions on their faces. The crew gazed up at them, some straightening a little. Captain Nemo looked around, seeming to take attendance, and I saw him notice me there, but he did not seem to mind.

“Gren arog William?” ‘Where is William?’. It was one of the few phrases I understood, and a crewmate near the door got up, and went to fetch him. When he appeared, he looked absolutely wretched, stumbling along. To my great surprise, he walked over to where I was sitting, and slumped down opposite me. Without a word, I pushed my drink over to him, and he downed it in one go. Looking on sympathetically, Captain Nemo then started speaking in his deep, melodious voice. On his tongue, Nautilese was a beautiful language, and his commanding presence filled the room. As he spoke, I noticed the men all focusing intently, nodding along solemnly, and I saw several of them shedding a tear. He was once again the noble king from fables of old, addressing his troops, and I watch them fill with pride and purpose from his speech. Silencing, he then bowed his head, as if in prayer, and the crew all did the same. I did too, and despite never having been anything but atheist, I said a prayer for my friend Thomas, who I considered one of the kindest men I’d ever known, despite our all too short acquaintance. Once everyone turned their faces back to the Captain, he raised a glass, declaring;

“Ren Thomas!” ‘To Thomas!’. We raised our glasses with him, thinking of our lost companion, and drank in silence. 

“I wanted to thank you, ma’am, on behalf of Thomas. You singing to him, he was at peace, and he could finally reunite with Isabelle,” William was saying to me, now slurring slightly. I could feel my eyes filling with tears, thinking how pitifully little help my song had been, when modern medicine might have saved that good man. I clasped William’s hand, and he put his other one on top of mine. 

“He’s happy now, I think, being with her. She was my sister, but she died a long time ago. Tom never really recovered. One day I’ll see them again, and little Sarah. She’d be… gosh, she’d be a little lady by now, had she lived. Almost grown!” His voice broke, and he wiped at his tears with his sleeve. 

“Tom finally gets to be a father, like he always wanted. Yeah, I’m sure they’re having a grand old time in Heaven already, probably put on a big celebration when he arrived, too. And I’m still down here…” I didn’t know what to say, but I’m not sure words would have been welcomed, so I let him speak.

“It was always Tom and me, after Isabelle died with little Sarah. Our mom and pa were long gone, but he looked out for me. I was still pretty young then, you know,” he said with a laugh, followed by a sob. 

“He was my brother, as sure as she was my sister. And now he’s gone too.” At this, he broke down completely, crying into the table. The men around all comforted him as best they could, and he squeezed my hand, which was still holding his. Snivelling, he wiped his sleeve across his face again, and then looked up at me.

“Ma’am, sing him a final farewell song, maybe they’ll hear it up in Heaven!” Despite feeling terribly uncomfortable at the thought of breaking the somber silence reigning, only interrupted by William’s monologue, how could I refuse his request? I thought of what song could possibly be appropriate for a moment like this, one that properly encompassed the grief we all felt, but then remembered the Captain’s speech. How it had filled the men with such hope and belief in their mission, whatever it might be, and realised what it was they needed to hear. I began gently;

Speed bonnie boat like a bird on the wing.

Onward, the sailors cry.

Carry the lad that's born to be king

Over the sea to Skye.

Loud the winds howl, loud the waves roar.

Thunderclaps rend the air,

Baffled, our foes stand by the shore,

Follow they will not dare.

I was looking down at the table, and had not the confidence to sing too loudly, but the room was so quiet everyone must have heard anyway. It remained quiet, until I started the chorus for the second time, when a couple voices from down the table joined in, and a few more from across the room. 

Speed bonnie boat like a bird on the wing.

Onward, the sailors cry.

Carry the lad that's born to be king

Over the sea to Skye.

Though the waves leap, soft shall ye sleep,

Ocean's a royal bed.

Rocked in the deep Flora will keep

Watch by your weary head.

My voice only wavered slightly, as I sang the words ‘soft ye shall sleep’, but I continued on. About half the room joined in for the third chorus, singing the words as best they could.

Speed bonnie boat like a bird on the wing.

Onward, the sailors cry.

Carry the lad that's born to be king

Over the sea to Skye.

Many's the lad fought on that day

Well the claymore could wield

When the night came silently lay

Dead on Culloden's field.

By the fourth chorus, the whole mess hall joined in, and the men were striking their palms against the tables. The sound mimicked the beating of a war drum, and the deep voices rose up louder as their confidence grew. 

Speed bonnie boat like a bird on the wing.

Onward, the sailors cry.

Carry the lad that's born to be king

Over the sea to Skye.

I arose, and sang the last verse with fervor, thinking of Thomas’s unfair death, and unfair life, and how his story must mimic in woe that of every man around me, whom I all considered my friends by now. That was the reason they had fled the world above: Injustice. Whatever their mission may be, they were good men, and I would without a doubt be on their side.

Burned are our homes, exile and death

Scatter the loyal men;

Yet, ere the sword cool in the sheath,

Charlie will come again!

They all hailed the vow of the rebellious prince’s return, before joining me for the last chorus, which we sang together in ardent passion.

Speed bonnie boat like a bird on the wing.

Onward, the sailors cry.

Carry the lad that's born to be king

Over the sea to Skye!

As I looked around the room, I met Captain Nemo’s eyes, and they were glowing fiercely, the ghost of a smile on his lips. 

Chapter Text

We did not sleep in between the wake and the funeral in the coral cemetery, but stayed together in the mess hall until morning, no one wanting to leave the comfort of the community. When we returned, having buried Thomas in his the serene grave, I went up to the platform with Professor Aronnax, to try and decompress from the turmoil of the last twenty-four hours. I would not be able to sleep in my current state, no matter how tired I was. The empathetic Pierre sat in silence with me, before we were joined by Captain Nemo. He had not slept at all these past three days, and I wondered how he was still upright. Pierre spoke in English, as he always kindly did for my benefit, and asked the Captain if the man had died during the night, as he had predicted. I was not surprised to hear of his verdict, most head injuries would have been fatal in this day and age, and nothing but the last sliver of hope cold have prevented anyone, doctor or not, from coming to the same conclusion.

“Yes, Professor Aronnax,” the Captain answered, and sank down next to us. We were both perhaps a bit startled at the unusual familiarity of this normally so reserved individual, but the circumstances were unusual too, and I know we both welcomed him. 

“And now he’s resting next to his companions in that coral cemetery?” Pierre asked in his compassionate way. I had been unable to refrain from, in morbid curiosity, counting the graves in that alien place. There had been seven of them. Now there were eight. Eight men who had been lost in the less than three years since the Nautilus had sailed. Perhaps some illness had raged aboard at some point. Perhaps they had eaten some bad shellfish. Somehow I doubted both options. No, they had all died for their mission, I was sure of it, and I was becoming increasingly desperate to find out what it was. I so badly wanted to be able to share in their strife, since making my mind up that they had justice on their side. Captain Nemo started answering the professor’s question, and said in great fervor;

“Yes, forgotten by the world, but not by us! We dig the graves, and then the polyps are in charge of sealing them up for all eternity!” His voice broke at the last word, and he covered his face with his clenched fists. Pierre and I were stunned for a second, staring at each other, before we rushed to comfort the man we both held so dear. I flung my arms around his neck, caressed his hair, and he pulled me close with one arm. Pierre took his other hand, the Captain clasping it desperately, while he stroked his back. We said nothing, simply held him, as he sobbed quietly. We stayed like that for several minutes, before he calmed down, and we withdrew slightly. In a shaky voice, he added;

“It’s our peaceful cemetery, hundreds of feet under the surface of the waves.”

“At least, Capitaine, your dead sleep serenely there, out of the reach of sharks,” Pierre said quietly, trying to console him.

“Yes, sir, of sharks and men,” he replied solemnly. Me and the professor exchanged an uneasy glance, and I took it upon myself to change the subject.

“He was a good man. He will be sorely missed.” I wiped a stray tear from my cheek with my sleeve. 

“Such is our life,” replied Captain Nemo bitterly. I thought of Kumar’s words. ‘You were right to try and stop us, Madam! What are we doing? Have we not lost enough already? Are we to also lose each other, and even ourselves?’ The Captain seemed to have resigned himself to it, certainly, but his chief officer may no longer share his conviction. I looked at him compassionately. I could not imagine what must have happened to him for such an absolute conviction to form. Trying to placate him, I said gently;

“Will you not try to rest, Captain? There is nothing more to be done, and you must be exhausted.” He smiled slightly, but it did not reach his eyes, who remained anguished. 

“There is always more to be done, Eleonora.” Aronnax spoke up;

“Surely nothing that cannot wait, sir. Take repose for a few hours.”

“Doctor’s orders?” the Captain smiled, slightly wider now.

“Oui, Capitaine, doctor’s orders,” Pierre smiled back.

“Very well, then I shall do so.” Taking both of our hands, he said sincerely;

“Thank you, my friends.” He arose, and walked down the companionway with heavy steps, nothing like his usual, graceful walk. We looked after him in silence.

“You knew the man too, mademoiselle?” Aronnax asked me gently, after a while. I leaned my head on his shoulder, and he put his arm around me. 

“I did. His name was Thomas, and he deserved better. I think they all do.” 

I knew the professor did not share my absolute conviction that the Nautilus’s crew were innocent of any crime, but then again he did not know them as I did. Although, he did know the Captain, and respected him tremendously, and I could tell he was struggling to reconcile his previous view of him with what he had seen and heard in the last few days. Watching the forever temperate Captain display such fervent emotions of anger and sadness had made him more human to the professor, I think, and less L’homme des eaux, as he called him so admiringly. The events surrounding the collision had shaken Pierre, as it had us all. I had not only those events to think of, but also the reason I had confronted the Captain in such anger two days ago. The collision and its aftermath had given us respite from dealing with that incident for now, but I did not doubt my behaviour had not been forgotten. But then again, neither had his, and I could not ignore my feelings of deep hurt forever. 

I was sitting in the lounge the next morning, reading my book, when the other party responsible for my pain came in. He had clearly been looking for me, but still hesitated to speak, rubbing his neck awkwardly. 

“Fancy meeting you here, your highness,” Ned started, but I shut him down with a disapproving look over the pages. He sighed, and walked over to me.

“This seat taken?” he asked, gesturing next to me on the sofa. I slung my legs up, taking up the full length of it. He chuckled a little.

“Come on now, don’t be like that.” I snapped my book shut.

“Why not? I wouldn’t want you to get the wrong idea!” I hissed at him, but he seemed undeterred. I was most likely not the first woman he had angered. Instead, he sank down on one knee, meeting me eye to eye.

“I’m sorry for what I said. I was just so damn angry with the Captain, accusing me like that! But I had no right to say what I did,” he said, looking exasperated. Since I do suffer from Ned Land’s hot temper, and have more than once said something I regretted afterwards, I could not help but sympathise. I sighed, and put down my book. 

“Neither did he, and I will tell him as much,” I said solemnly, meeting his blue eyes. I drew my legs up so that there was room for him to take a seat. He gave me a one-sided smile, sitting down, and it was hard to stay angry at him when he tried his best to be charming. 

“You’re gonna defend my honour to the Captain, your highness? I’m flattered!” I kicked his leg, but could not help but smile back. 

“Don’t think that means I’ll forgive you just like that! I’m simply angrier at him than I am at you.” He laughed, not sounding displeased at this announcement at all. 

“Well, I’m not gonna say I’m sorry to have come between you two, cause I’m not! I just need to know if there is anything I can do to earn your forgiveness, ma’am?” I thought for a moment, and realised I was not angry with him at all, really. After all, I was not completely innocent in this scenario. 

“You’re forgiven, Ned. I understand why you said what you did. After all, I did encourage you.” I’ll admit I felt pleased to see his shocked expression.

“You’re not saying..?” I kicked him again.

“No! I’m just saying I shouldn’t have flirted with you, giving you the wrong idea. It won’t happen again.” I couldn’t tell for certain if he was relieved or disappointed. But then he shrugged, and smiled.

“Don’t worry about me, your highness, I think I can handle a little harmless flirting. It’s pretty much the only fun to be had around here anyway. I’d hate for you to stop on account of my big, dumb mouth.” I laughed, and he grinned at me. Somehow, I doubted my meeting with the Captain would go so smoothly.

Chapter Text

Stalling this event a little further, I went up onto the platform as we surfaced at noon. Professor Aronnax was there, and he was pleased to hear of Ned’s apology. Soon after us, Kumar came to take his usual survey, and I thought he looked truly dreadful. He did not seem as though he had slept at all since I’d seen him in the mess hall yesterday morning. Pierre addressed him kindly, asking in French how he was, but he was ignored. Feeling he preferred to do his duty undisturbed, I said nothing, but then saw Jakub come up, not a minute behind Kumar. He started cleaning the glass panes of the beacon housing, a task I’d never seen being done before, and I suspected this was but an excuse to come up here. My suspicion was confirmed as I watched Kumar roll his eyes, before he hissed something in Nautilese to his partner. Jakub did not reply, simply continued his task, but he did shoot me a painful glance. Kumar was not doing well. He disappeared down the hatch without another word to any of us, and I watched as Jakub quickly finished up, before following him down. I so wished we shared some common language, so that I might have asked whether there was anything I could do for Kumar. Although, if even Jakub could do nothing, what hope was there for me?

I managed to stall my meeting with the Captain until the next evening, presumably from him having much more important things to see to first. I had gone down to the mess hall once since the wake, but the mood was understandably glum, and none of my regular table mates were there, despite it being busy. The reminder of why they were absent was so painful that I could not bring myself to return again. Instead, I got to enjoy some of Ned Land’s cooking, with the ingredients collected on Gueboroa Island, which was an excellent change of pace. He seemed pleased to have cheered me up, and frankly he was the only thing that currently did. His complete detachment from the grief of the crew made me forget my own grief for a while. It crept back as I found myself in bed, unable to sleep. I threw back the sheets, and put on my dress in a haste, as I had that night of the wake, when I got up to pace the gangways, the very image of a ghost haunting the ship. I shuddered at the morbid thought, and went instead to the lounge. I tried reading my book again, but felt too restless. I paced about the room, before finding myself in front of the organ. I sat down, sighing heavily. I was very nervous for the meeting with the Captain, and every day that passed without getting it over with, my anger dissipated, and was replaced by anxiety. Subconsciously, I had started plinking at the organ keys, to the tune of Öppna landskap, one of my favourite songs. I sang along gently;

Jag trivs bäst i öppna landskap

Nära havet vill jag bo

Några månader om året

Så att själen kan få ro

“You told me you don’t play,” said a deep voice behind me. I had not noticed him come in, but then again, I had been very occupied with my thoughts. Now that he was here, I felt neither anger nor anxiety, but a serene calm, granted by his presence. I smiled down at the keyboard.

“That’s about the extent of it, Captain, unless you’d like to hear Für Elise as well.” I heard him come up behind me.

“Move over.” I felt my heartbeat speed up, but did as he said. He sat down next to me, and started playing the melody with much greater eloquence than I had. 

“Then how does it go?” I sang the rest of the verse with my heart beating in my chest, feeling the warmth of his body next to mine, our arms touching slightly. He replayed it perfectly, the organ giving the melody a gravitas the version I knew lacked. I watched his graceful, long fingers move over the keys, mesmerised. When he finished, he looked at me.
“A beautiful song. What’s it about?” His dark eyes looked at me imploringly, and I knew I must be blushing. I had to look away before answering, quickly translating the first lines;

“I prefer the open landscape, near the sea I’d like to live, for a few months of the year, so that my soul may rest.” 

“Sing it again,” he said, turning back to the organ. I did, trying my best not to get distracted by his hands, his perfect side profile, or the warmth from his body, so close to mine… As I sang the next two verses, I couldn’t help but think how perfectly they described him. ‘I prefer peace and freedom, for my body and soul. No one gets close to me, to shut away and steal. I prefer the surging of the waves, and the call of the gulls. When the beach is strewn with seashells, the music of the ocean inside.’ I wanted so badly to touch him again, to hold him close, as I had two days ago. The moment had been so rare, and I remembered the feeling vividly, painfully so. I did not know whether it might ever be repeated, and thought bitterly of the charges I would have to put against him. Had he really meant those words, could he have been so cruel? Was there any way I might avoid the upcoming confrontation? Could I swallow my pride, and pretend as if I’d never been told of the accusation? As the last notes sounded, Captain Nemo looked down, and sighed deeply. 

“Who told you of our mission, Eleonora?” he asked, in a grave voice. 

I stared at him, in complete confusion. When I did not answer, he looked up at me, with steely eyes.

“Who told you of the mission? You need to tell me, as no one will admit to it.” I was absolutely bewildered, what could he mean? 

“I- I don’t understand you, sir,” I managed. He seemed to try and read my mind, his piercing gaze fixing on me, before his face softened. 

“I realise you do not want to betray your friend, miss, but whoever shared this secret with you had no right to do so, and broke the trust of everyone onboard. We will have no peace before the matter is resolved.” I felt almost dizzy, as if I was in one of those dreams where you’re back in school, taking a test for a class you didn’t sign up for. I could not for the life of me understand what he meant. 

“Sir, please, I don’t understand what you’re asking me. I don’t know of any secret,” I whispered. The Captain started to get annoyed at my thickness.

“Stop playing the fool, Eleonora, it doesn’t suit you!” he exclaimed. Then, in a much quieter voice, with an edge of pain to it, asked me with his face turned down;

“Was it Kumar?” I started getting frustrated now too, unable to figure out what it was he wanted of me.

“Captain Nemo, please, I do not know what you are talking about! I do not know what your mission onboard is, no one has told me, and I have not been able to guess it either!” I said firmly, wishing for the interrogation to be over. He looked up at me, eyes wide, once again attempting to see right into my mind. Whatever he saw must have made him finally believe I was telling the truth. 

“But then… when you came up onto the platform to stop us…” he started saying, seeming to try to consolidate what had happened with this new information. 

“Were you simply objecting to the detention of you and your friends, as I thought at first? Had the professor just told you of it? Need I remind you of it being the only demand I put forward for your stay aboard the Nautilus?” he reprimanded, seeming relieved, disappointed and confused, all at the same time. I straighted a little, realising with resignation that the time for our ‘round two’ had come. 

“No, sir, that was not the reason for my anger. I remember the agreement well, despite what I may think of it.” All other emotions disappeared from his face, replaced by astonishment.

“Ah. I thought perhaps you felt it no longer applied to you, since…” Then, seeming to interrupt himself, he asked me with a slight shake of the head;

“Then what was the reason? What did you mean by ‘what I did’?” I met his eyes with defiance, the hurt coming back now. 

“Ned Land told me what you said! What have I done that could possibly justify such a low opinion of me?” His astonishment turned into horror at my words.

“Eleonora, I’m not sure what makes you…”

“‘She has better options’?” I interrupted him again, and saw him pale, which actually gave me some satisfaction. 

“What did you mean by that? Do you suppose I make friends with the crew simply to have ‘options’ in which men to bed onboard? That perhaps it is I getting people drunk, to have my way with them? That’s what you meant, likening me to a witch, turning your men into swine! Well, I do not know what you claim to have heard them say, Captain, but I can assure you, there is only one man onboard who I feel anything but friendship for!” I quieted suddenly, definitely not having meant to say the last bit out loud. I saw his eyes flash with anger. He arose, and started pacing the room, his arms crossed over his chest.

“You have misunderstood my meaning, miss Larsson. I would never imply anything of the sort, especially not of someone I hold in such high regard!” I was shocked at this confession, so contrary to what I had believed for the past days, but could not begin to process his words before he continued.

“Regardless of that, I cannot hide the fact that I think you would have been better off choosing just about anybody else onboard as the object of your affection!” I felt as though my heart stopped. My stomach knotted. He’d just confirmed what I’d known all along, deep down. He could never feel for me what I felt for him, his heart was forever closed. I could feel the damnable tears burning in my eyes, and was just about to leave, perhaps to fling myself into the sea, hoping it would bring me back home, as it had brought me here. But then he added, to my astonishment;

“That harpooner does not deserve your affection, Eleonora.” Stunned, my mind went blank suddenly, all woe momentarily forgotten at his strange words.

“P- pardon?” 

“Ned Land is a brute, and a drunk, who cares only for life’s frivolities. You deserve a worthy match, an equal.” 

Chapter Text

Could I really be hearing him correctly? Did this man, for whom I would throw away all I’d known of the world, think I had meant Ned? Because of that evening? I couldn’t believe my ears. So he had not realised I meant him? I cannot tell you whether I was relieved or disappointed. At least it meant he had not rejected me, not yet, and I might be able to cling to whatever little hope I had had. I was on the edge of the abyss, terrified to cast myself into it, yet feeling its call to me. I cast down my eyes, finally welcoming it, no longer able to withstand, now that I was on its precipice.

“Sir, it is you who misunderstand me. I resent your allegations against my friend Ned Land, both on that evening and today, but he is not who I meant. I fear the man I so admire will never be able to return my feelings,” I admitted, almost breathlessly. The Captain did not say anything for what felt like ages, and eventually I had to look up. He was staring at me, his face in absolute anguish. He closed his eyes, and with great compassion, he said slowly;

“Miss, I am truly sorry. It is most unfortunate circumstances you find yourself in, for I am sure, if he was able to, he would gladly return your love.” And there it was. I could feel the abyss starting to swallow me up, and I closed my eyes too, wishing for it to do so, as long as I would not have to face the Captain after his rejection. He’d been most kind, there was no more merciful way he could have told me, but it was a rejection all the same. His voice brought me back to reality.

“The professor is most worthy of your love, Eleonora, truly. He is kind, intelligent, and handsome, and it pains me greatly that there should be such an insurmountable obstacle in the way of your happiness.” I stared at him, my mind blank. He came to sit beside me again, and took my hand. Looking at me with both compassion and something else I was not quite able to distinguish, he said solemnly;

“I’ve known about the professor for some time now, and thought perhaps you had guessed as much too, if he has not told you himself?” I blinked at him. He smiled bitterly at me, his eyes still anguished. But his assumption to my confusion was wrong, as he continued;

“Rest assured, it does not diminish my respect for him one bit, although I am sorry his disposition should cause such suffering to you. As you know, my chief officer, who is a brother to me, is a man of the same disposition. I have been aware of Kumar’s secret since long before we boarded the Nautilus, and left society’s moral dictations behind. Here, everyone is free to be their true selves. I must say, I was astonished when he told me of your reaction to him and Jakub being together, and even more astonished he’d even shared it with you. But Kumar has always a good judge of character, and clearly his instincts proved correct again. It is not the first time I have been pleasantly surprised with you, Eleonora, and most likely not the last.” Trying to make sense of this torrent of information, I felt dazed. It was too much to take in at once.

“Captain, I fear I need to lie down,” I said in an exhale, starting to sway on the narrow bench where we were sat. He put an arm around me at once, holding me upright, and led me to a sofa. I clung to him, feeling as if I was being waterboarded, my emotions thrown one way, then the other. Gently helping me down, he then went to fetch me a drink, and I had a moment to collect my thoughts. For some reason, he had not understood what I had told him, but assumed I was talking about Professor Aronnax! Who, apparently, Captain Nemo already knew was gay. Had he guessed, like myself, or… 

“Miss, please,” he said, handing me the glass before sitting down. I took a gulp with shaking hands. He was watching me with worry.

“Are you quite alright?” The liquid stuck in my throat, and I coughed a little. I thought whether I should clarify my meaning, but if he could not even understand when I told him outright, I did not see what point it would serve. If he’d returned even a fragment of what I felt for him, there was no chance he would have misunderstood my words. No, better he believed I was hopelessly in love with Aronnax, so that I might at least continue my friendship with the Captain, as long as he did not know the truth. I took a deep breath, fighting to keep my emotions in check.

“Yes, thank you, sir. Quite alright.” I’m not sure how well I managed to act indifferent, for he took my hand again, and said with great emotion;

“I must ask your forgiveness for my careless words. Please understand, they were said in a state of anger, and not meant as any criticism of your character. Rather the opposite.” Here he seemed to stop himself, and chose his next words very carefully. “You know my opinion on the Canadian, and although I am pleased that he is not the object of your affection, the current situation is no easier for you.” I looked up. I felt so hopeless, and meeting his eyes, I saw in them the same sentiment. I withdrew my hand, touching him was too painful right now, and said in an apathetic voice;

“I still don’t understand what you meant. You said I had better ‘options’, but apart from Professor Aronnax, who you knew would not return my feelings, that leaves Conseil, who I can just about exchange a greeting phrase with, since we don’t share a language!” He smiled bitterly, and looked away from me. 

“You really have no interest in anyone else, then, miss?” I frowned.

“Of the crew, you mean? What would that matter, Kumar told me of the pact!” A thought struck me before he had time to answer. I sat up, my dizziness forgotten.

“Is that why you thought someone had told me of the mission? Because I might be… seeing someone from the crew?” I asked, hesitating on the proper way to phrase it. He would still not look at me.

“It was a possibility, after your outburst on the platform. I also know Kumar has a tendency to overshare, when it comes to you. But not only that. It was also… when you sang, at the wake. How did you know to choose such a song, if you are unaware of our mission?” I thought for a moment, but decided to tell him the truth. 

“I didn’t say I was unaware of your mission, I simply do not know the details of it. But what I have concluded, is that I must trust my character judgment, and I have seen no evidence to contradict you all being good men. Therefore, I decided that I am on your side, regardless of what it might be.” Captain Nemo finally looked at me, his eyes fervent, with a pained expression of his face. 

“Even good men are capable of evil, should circumstances force them to it.” I stared at him. 

“When you sang like that, rallying the men, I thought you must know, and had accepted us in spite of it!” I could see tears forming in his eyes, and now it was I who tried to clasp his hand, but he arose. 

“Captain, I just told you I accept it regardless of the details!” I tried, appeasingly.

“You do not know what you are saying! You cannot understand…”

“So tell me!” I exclaimed, rising as well. 

“Please, let me share in your mission, help me understand-” I pleaded. 

“No! I will not have you complicit to our actions. We are damned already, but you are still innocent, and I will not be the one to damn you too!” he raged, before storming off, leaving me with more questions than answers.

Chapter Text

My meeting with the Captain had achieved the desired outcome, even beyond what I could have hoped for. He had asked me forgiveness for his crude remark, and in the most sincere terms explained why he had made it. He had even told me that he held me in the highest regard, among other kind words. Yet, none of them comforted me. I felt even emptier than I had before. How could I go on, pretending I did not feel for him what I did? How could I continue my friendship with the crew, this source of genuine joy onboard, without remember his ominous warning? ‘Even good men are capable of evil’. He’d called them damned! How could I believe his words, contradictory to everything I had experienced? My character judgment had never failed me before. If I could not trust in that, what could I trust in? Captain Nemo would not tell me of their purpose onboard, would not let me in, so I may never know the truth. I could feel my anxiety returning with full force, and paced the lounge back and forward, until the proximity to the Captain’s room became too painful.  

Over the ensuing days, as we travelled across the Indian Ocean, my friends did their best to distract me from my depressive mood. Ned did resume teaching me how to play the guitar, and behaved like a perfect gentleman while doing so. He occasionally made me laugh, with a cheerful glint in his blue eyes, playing me raunchy sea shanties. Conseil would show me the different specimens of shells and marine plants in the museum of the lounge, giving me their latin names and classification, and I appreciated his efforts. His constant calm, and steady voice had a relaxing effect on me. Pierre explained in great detail the species of fish and sea birds we spotted from the platform and through the lounge windows, doing so with such enthusiasm that I forgot everything else for the moment. I wanted so badly to tell him of my meeting with the Captain, to tell him that we both knew of his secret, and that it in no way diminished our deep respect for him, but wasn’t sure how to do so without revealing the rest of the conversation. Pierre knew something had taken place, and eventually he did ask me about it, in a gentle tone which let me know I need not answer. I simply told him that it had all been a misunderstanding, and that the Captain had apologised for expressing himself thus. He studied me for a moment, I could see he wanted to question me further, but he was too considerate to probe into the matter, since I clearly did not share anymore willingly. I did not see the Captain, or his crew, apart from Kumar taking his survey on the platform. We did not speak to each other, and I did not go to the mess hall. Ned Land spoke again of us escaping, now that we were nearing populated areas, but the professor said that we should wait further to attempt it. He claimed the Nautilus would take us to Europe, but I think both me and Ned knew it was because he was eager to continue our journey under the seas. I did not know whose side I was on anymore. What life awaited me, were I to escape? My hopes of somehow going back to my own time had diminished into nothingness. Yet, what life was there to be had aboard, if I would never be able to truly become part of the crew? My hopelessness knew no bounds, and I focused all my energy on being a passive spectator of the wonders of the sea. An unwelcome sight among the wonders came as we passed the Bay of Bengal, where floating corpses, carried out by the Ganges, met our ship. The sight made me incredibly uneasy, and I was forced to shut myself in the library, trying not to think of the dead surrounding us. I felt ashamed when I realised part of the reason it made me so uneasy was that I could not help but imagine myself one among them, floating serenely away, all earthly worries gone. 

Fortunately, we soon left these waters, and the next day, January 28th, I was free to resume my ordinary, grim musings instead. I was laying on my long since claimed perch under one of the crystal windows, when Professor Aronnax appeared, looking rather excited, and noted our position on the charts. He went into the library, and soon came back with a book, studying it with interest. I found I could not upbring enough enthusiasm to ask him what he was doing, so I just kept looking out the window. Soon, Captain Nemo and Kumar appeared in the salon, and I glanced over at them. They looked at me, but said nothing. Still too deep in dismay, I just sighed in apathy, and kept watching the sea go by outside. I didn’t know how much longer I could exist in this limbo, and the fact that only a week had passed so far did not bode well. I overheard as the Captain addressed Pierre, in English, strangely;

“The island of Ceylon is famous for its pearl fisheries. Would you be open to visiting one of those fisheries, Professor Aronnax?” The professor answered with enthusiasm over the suggestion. The Captain then proceeded to delve into a discussion with him, about the practical aspects of pearl fishing, and the ethics of it, all still in English. I’m not sure if he was hoping I would join in, but I did not, and neither did Kumar. Soon though, I heard Captain Nemo ask Pierre if he was afraid of sharks. 

“Sharks?” he exclaimed. 

“Well?” antagonized Nemo, despite the answer being obvious.

“I admit, Capitaine, I’m not yet on very familiar terms with that breed of fish,” said the poor professor, not wanting to admit in front of the Captain how sacred he was. 

“We’re used to them, the rest of us. And you will be too, in time,” he replied, in a careless tone. I couldn’t help but snort at this, remembering the way I’d been so severely reprimanded for not being scared of sharks. I don’t know if this earned me a reaction from any of them, since I wasn’t looking their way, but the Captain continued unphased;

“Anyhow, we’ll be armed, and on our way we might hunt a man-eater or two. It’s an interesting sport. If you feel uneasy, sir, I advice you to stay close to our brave shark tamer, I’m sure she will protect you!” I still did not deign the man with a glance, but replied sarcastically;

“You will have to do without my shark-taming skills, sir. I will not be joining you tomorrow.” I could simply not muster the energy to do anything but lie right here, day in and day out, and did not see the point in coming with them. There were pearls of every possible variety in this very room, some close to the size of an egg, and I had no wish to watch some poor bastard risk his life to satisfy the whims of fashion, should a diver appear. Oysters I had seen before in abundance, the western bay of my summer island was strewn with them. The Captain was silent for a moment, and I thought he might protest, but then said in the same carefree tone;

“Very well, miss Larsson. Professor, I shall see you and your other companions tomorrow, bright and early.” I could hear him and Kumar leaving the lounge, and imagined the professor standing dumbstruck, contemplating his words. After a while, he sat down, and seemed to absent-mindedly flip through the pages of his book. Before long, our other two friends came in, and I caught that they were both excited to join in the expedition tomorrow. Poor Pierre, now he couldn’t use that as an excuse not to go. I understood when Ned asked the professor if he would be going with them, and he replied that yes, of course he would, but that I had declined. Ned came over, and nudged me so that he could sit down by my feet. 

“Not feeling well, you highness?” 

“No, no, I’m well. I just don’t feel up to it,” I replied in an apathetic tone. 

“Finally had enough of that Nemo, have you?” he said in a joking tone, but I could not help notice the genuine hope in his voice. I didn’t want to disappoint him by saying that it was in fact quite the opposite, that I had had nowhere near enough of him, and maybe never would.

“Something like that,” I said instead. He did not seem as pleased with the reply as I would have guessed, but instead looked at me with some worry.

“Well, if you’re certain… Don’t go staging a mutiny without us, is all!” he tried to joke again. The corner of my mouth pulled into a joyless half-smile.

“I promise,” I said, all the while staring out the window. Ned Land arose, and went back to our companions, who were engaged in a heated discussion about pearl-fishing. I caught a sentence here and there, but wasn’t listening too intently, until Conseil uttered the following words with a laugh;

“Ned Land l’époux de Cléopâtre!” Hold on, what had I missed? I turned my head to them.

“Pardon?” I asked, unable not to smile at the idea.

“I don’t know why mr. Conseil is laughing, I bet he’s never been engaged in the first place!” said the Canadian indignantly to me.

“But I was all set to walk down the isle, and it wasn’t my fault the whole business fell through! I even bought a pearl necklace for my fiancée, Kate Tender, but she married somebody else instead. Well, that necklace cost me only a dollar fifty, but you can absolutely trust me on this, professor - its pearls were so big, they wouldn’t have gone through that strainer with twenty holes!” The professor laughed at this, explaining how the necklace had been made of nothing but imitation pearls, but I felt bad for Ned.

“Maybe that’s why Kate Tender married somebody else…” he said, clearly hurt by the slightly condescending way in which the professor had talked to him. 

“Or maybe she was a fool,” I added in a sharp tone. 

“I’m sure you’re better off marrying somebody else too, if she was too dimwitted to appreciate your gesture!” Both Ned and Pierre stared at me, surprised by this sudden outburst, but I ignored them again. I had perhaps not only had Ned Land and Kate Tender in mind when I spoke. The professor, clearly uncomfortable, quickly went back to their discussion in French. 

Chapter Text

I awoke early the next morning after a fitful sleep. Sick to death of my bed the way you are after a restless night, I went up to the platform. The skiff was gone, my companions and the Captain with it, and I sat in silence, watching the new day dawn. A group of a dozen or so crewmen came up to haul in the nets, all familiar faces to me, but we did not greet each other. If I would not ever be allowed to know of their whole raison d’être, how could we be anything but strangers, really? I sat hugging my knees, facing away from them, stubbornly watching the sea, when I heard one of them whistling a familiar tune. The lion sleeps tonight. Tears started to burn in my eyes. A few more of them joined in, whistling as they worked, not saying a word. The tears were now streaming down my face, but I just kept watching the horizon. They quieted as they finished their task, and started taking the catch downstairs, when I answered them;

Hush, my darling, don't fear, my darling

The lion sleeps tonight

I looked over my shoulder, and saw pained expressions on their faces which mirrored my own, before they all disappeared down the hatch. 

It was another hour before the skiff returned. I watched as it was moored securely to the hull, the Captain, his crewmen, and my companions all leaving it. The professor looked pale, and Ned seemed in an unusually foul mood. Conseil went straight downstairs with him, followed by the crew carrying the diving equipment. I arose, looking at Professor Aronnax and Captain Nemo questioningly.

“Did something happen?” 

“Oh, mademoiselle, it was the most horrifying encounter! We were watching a diver harvesting the oysters, when suddenly, a terrifying man-eater appeared! He dodged its jaws, but not its tail, and was rendered unconscious on the seafloor! The beast went to attack again, and would have surely killed the man, had not the Captain stepped in!” I turned to stare at the Captain, who remained unphased, saying nothing. The professor continued;

“He attacked the beast with nothing but a knife, and a terrible combat ensued, but the Captain fell, and oh, mon Dieu, I thought…” He glanced at the Captain, as if to make sure he really was unharmed. I felt myself pale, and started to sway where I was stood, thinking what had almost happened. Aronnax resumed his tale;

“But he was saved, miraculously, by the harpoon of Ned Land! He gave the shark its death-blow, and dragged the Captain to safety!” Ah. Now I understood the reason for Ned’s mood. I felt an immense gratitude towards him, but an irrational anger at the Captain, for putting his life in danger. I said in as sarcastic a tone as I could manage, despite my emotions;

“Did you not try pushing the shark away, Captain? Or perhaps you should have stayed with the group?” The irony of this incident after my own one was not lost on him, and he glanced at me with an expression somewhere between annoyance and appreciation for my wit. I could not help but give a small, triumphant smile. 

“I fear this beast was significantly larger than the one you encountered, miss. All the same, it could not be helped. Had I not intervened, that man would have died, as the professor said!” It took all my strength not to roll my eyes at him, but Aronnax saved me by jumping in.

“Indeed, Captain, your bravery saved that poor Indian’s life. Although, I must admit, I am surprised. You have so often said that you have severed all ties with humanity, yet, it seems in your heart you still hold great empathy for your fellow man.” The Captain’s calm expression faltered for a moment, and he said with fervor;

“That Indian, professor, lives in the land of the oppressed, and till my last breath I shall remain a native of that same land!” With those words, he left us, both astonished at this passionate statement. 

Me and Professor Aronnax were divided over the meaning of those words. He was sure the Captain had simply meant that he was freedom fighter, which made him and all other oppressed people the same, whereas I saw it as an admittance of his true nationality. I’m not sure why the professor did not want to add this clue to our jigsaw puzzle, or at least attempt to see if it fit, but he refused. I knew there were books in Hindi in the library, but I supposed they could be Kumar’s. Or someone else’s, for all I knew. Either way, it did not matter, since we knew nothing for certain. Same as always. It was a frustrating jigsaw puzzle to play, indeed. 

As we passed the Maldives, I thought what it would be like to visit those islands now, before the whole country consisted of nothing but fancy hotels for rich, western tourists. I would not get the chance to find out, as we raced north-west towards the Gulf of Oman. Ned Land spoke as always of escaping, and the professor of staying, and I could still not make my mind up on which option was worse. February came, with no change to my situation. The professor seemed content to stick to his usual studies, and Conseil with him. When neither me or Ned was in too foul of a mood, we would play the guitar, and I slowly improved. I did have some semblance of pitch, and managed to start recreating a few songs in their most basic form. Most of the time though, I was reading by the window, or looking out it. Every day passed by in the exact same way, even though the sights were ever changing, but routine does not suit my restless nature. I feared I would go through Captain Nemo’s whole stash of both seaweed cigars and liquor, needing some form of mind-numbing substance almost every day at this point, to stave of my anxiety. The sight of the marine life as well as the coastal towns of the Arabian Peninsula were a distraction, absolutely, but it felt as though I saw it all in a dream.

Chapter Text

Me and Professor Aronnax were sat up on the platform, as so many times before, watching Kumar take his survey. It had now been close to three weeks since we’d spoken, and I held no great hope of it ever changing. This day, however, I was surprised as he turned to us, and seemed to want to say something, but then changed his mind. Instead, he simply bowed, and wished us a good day. Still, it was more acknowledgement than we’d had for a long time. Soon after, Captain Nemo came up onto the platform, and offered us both a cigar. We both accepted gratefully, but I felt suspicious. What was going on? I said nothing, smoking in silence as the Captain spoke to Pierre, and he seemed in an unusually good mood. They spoke of this Red Sea, which we were currently travelling across. I couldn’t help but smile bitterly as they were saying how the Nautilus was a century, perhaps several, ahead of its time, but I remained silent. When Aronnax asked if the Captain knew how the sea had gotten its name, he replied in good humour with a verse;

“To mark that miraculous sequel, the sea turned a red without equal. Thus, no other course would do, but to name it for its hue.” His rare cheerfulness was infectious, and although I knew I would regret it later, I could not help indulge myself. Just a moment’s respite from the gloom. And so, I actually laughed, meeting his eyes. He gave me one of his fond smiles, which I had not seen for so long now, and it felt as a stab to my heart. Turning back to the sea, I listened as they discussed the actual scientific reason behind the strange phenomenon. As they moved onto discussing the Suez canal, I was amazed to think that it was currently under construction, but dumbfounded when Captain Nemo then said that we would be in the Mediterranean the day after tomorrow. Aronnax shared in my confusion, asking how we would possibly be able to double the Cape of Good Hope and circle Africa in forty-eight hours. 

“And who says we will circle Africa, professor? What’s this talk about doubling the Cape of Good Hope?” 

“Are we to fly over the isthmus then, Captain? Have you finally decided to take my suggestion of filling the ballast tanks with helium?” I asked, sarcastically, but he laughed. The sound was my favourite one in the world, but right now, it only made my heart ache.

“No, miss, we will go under it, remaining in the water,” he answered smugly. 

“Under it?” the professor exclaimed. The Captain told us of his Arabian Tunnel, and it is safe to say we were both in awe at this discovery, which still in my time belonged to him only. 

“Am I out of line in asking how you discovered this tunnel?” the professor enquired. With a knowing smile, Captain Nemo told him;

“Sir, there can be no secrets between men who will never leave each other.” My eyes went wide, and I could feel my face turning red. I had to look away again. What could he mean by this innuendo? Did he hint at us all being aware of Aronnax’s disposition? But if so, did that mean he had told him willingly, rather than it being a guess, as in my case? And had he simply hinted at the fact that he would never let us leave the Nautilus, or did he share a bond with the professor stronger than I was aware of? I somehow felt cheated, despite having no right whatsoever to do so. But I would get no answers to my questions at this time, Pierre’s lack of reaction told me nothing. The Captain continued on, carefree as ever, explaining how he had come to the conclusion of the tunnel’s existence, and taken it upon himself to find it. He promised that we too would have travelled through it soon, transporting us to the Mediterranean within the given time.  

Just as we were heading back down the companionway to tell our friends of this interesting development, of which Ned Land would be especially pleased, Captain Nemo stopped me.

“Miss Larsson, may I have a word?” I froze, and gave the professor a panicked look. What on Earth could that impossible individual want now? Surely I could have done nothing wrong, since I had done nothing at all! Pierre tried to give me an encouraging smile, but looked mostly as terrified as I felt, and I think he was thankful to slip away down the gangways, leaving me alone with the Captain. Resigned, I sighed and turned around.

“May I wish you a happy birthday, miss?” he said appeasingly. I was stunned. Whatever I had expected, it was not this. I had not at all realised what today’s date was, existing in my Groundhog Day limbo for the past weeks. Trying to compose myself, I answered him;

“Uh, you may, sir. Thank you.” Somehow, this still felt like a trap.

“And what age might you be turning, miss?” I scoffed.

“Something between twenty and fifty or sixty, at least,” I answered, referring to his joke at Marco’s birthday party. He smiled, his eyes glinting at the memory, but his smile only pained me. 

“It’s not your thirtieth, is it?” he asked. I cast down my eyes, sighing again.

“No, sir, that’s still not for another hundred and fifty-nine years.” He seemed determined to stay in his good mood, and laughed at my joke, despite my melancholy tone.

“I’ve known women to lie about their age before, miss, but never quite to the extent you do.” I had to laugh, but bitterly, since this was one of the few things about me I had been completely truthful about. I also felt a pang of jealousy, thinking of the previous women who had tried to lie about their age to the handsome Captain. They had been numerous, no doubt. 

“Regardless of what age you are turning, we should like to celebrate you, Eleonora, if you are amenable,” he said, smiling encouragingly. I looked up at him, perplexed.

“What do you mean, sir?” 

“Well, what could I mean? We feel you should have a birthday celebration, tonight, in the dining room,” he said, in a jovial tone. I felt as though he was playing a cruel joke on me. Shaking my head with a joyless laugh, I told him;

“You cannot be serious, sir. Have you not admonished me at every opportunity for encouraging any festivities onboard? I would have half a mind to think your reason for going to the Mediterranean is so that you can cast me off at Aeaea.” He looked at me in shock, before collecting himself.

“I’m afraid you’ve yet again misunderstood my meaning, miss! How could I ever reprimand you for giving my crew such joy, as we’ve never before had onboard? Your presence has been a healing alleviation from what we’ve been used to.” Now it was my turn to be shocked. I tried to consolidate his words with the constant harassment I’d experienced at the previous parties onboard. Despite his assurances to the contrary, how could there possibly be another meaning to his words? I could not think of one, and didn’t know what to say in reply. He stepped closer to me.

“Please, Eleonora, forget my foolish jokes, and trust me when I say that you have indeed misunderstood their true meaning. It was never meant as admonition, in the slightest.” I glared at him, not feeling charitable enough to do as he asked.

“But you still will not tell me what exactly you meant by it?” To my surprise, he looked pained all of a sudden, and as always, I found I could not stay annoyed with him when he looked like that.

“It no longer matters, so no. Could we not forget about it, and enjoy celebrating your birthday tonight, as we would one of our own?” he said, almost pleadingly. Did he not understand either of the reasons for my absence these weeks? The first I might be able to ignore, as I had before, but not the second. Did he not see that there was no use in pretending I was part of the crew, as long as I was not allowed to share in everything they did? I looked at him in anguish.

“Sir, I cannot in good conscience be celebrated as part of the crew, as long as I am not allowed to truly be a part of you.” He frowned, his eyes mirroring my pain.

“Eleonora, I have told you the reason for not sharing that one secret with you. It is for your own good.” 

“It is not the only secret you do not share! Sir, I don’t even know your name!” I exclaimed, exasperated from weeks, even months, of this exclusion. He smiled bitterly.

“One secret would reveal the other, I’m afraid. I am only trying to protect you by keeping you in the dark. You would be a part of every other aspect of our life onboard, is that not enough?” he asked earnestly, and the offer was tempting beyond belief, but I could not accept it. I knew I would not be able to disregard the feeling of always being on the outside, looking in. I shook my head, close to tears now. Captain Nemo was clearly tormented by my refusal, looking away from me, and it took everything I had not to change my mind, just to comfort him. He sighed deeply.

“And what of your promise?” I did not know what promise he might be referring to. I had made no promise not to try and find out their secret. I stayed silent while trying to think what else he could mean. He finally looked up, and saw my confusion.

“You promised to endeavour to make me laugh. Have you forgotten?” he said in a sorrowful voice. I could feel my heart breaking, how could I refuse such a simple thing when I wanted nothing more than to concede? But my situation onboard would never change as long as I did not stand fast. I refused to believe him when he had told me that they committed evil deeds in the name of their mission, could not accept the claim that they were damned. He had been overjoyed when he, for a brief time, thought I knew of the mission, and accepted them regardless of it. I would make sure this became reality, but to do so I had to convince him that such would be the case. Taking his hand, I told him in all honesty what my feelings were;

“Sir, it is my dearest wish that I should be able to honour that promise. I would be content to do nothing but for the rest of my life, if only you would let me in! Let me share in your sorrows, as you would let me share in your joy! What must I do to cross that final threshold?” My voice was nothing but a whisper by the end. He clasped my hands with both of his, and looked down on them. He was silent for a long time before answering, his voice strained with emotion;

“You do not know what you are asking of me! Eleonora, how could I live with myself if I choose to condemn you for such selfish reasons?”

“It would not be for selfish reasons! Perhaps it is I who is selfish for asking, but I cannot go on like this, Captain. Either I shall be a part of your crew in every aspect, or in none! For it is too painful to feel everything that you do, without understanding why. I want to help you, to fight for justice alongside you, but you would shut me out instead! Indeed, you are condemning me far worse by excluding me in this way than by anything else you might do!” I could feel myself losing all composure, the prospect that he would truly never grant my wish looming over me, meaning I would be stuck in this limbo for the rest of my life, if we did not manage to escape. His touch was the only thing keeping me grounded, and I squeezed his hands fervently, wishing him to put an end to my suffering. I was staring straight ahead, not daring to meet his eyes should they tell me what I feared. He loosed my grip slightly, freeing one of his hands to gently tilt my face upwards. Finally facing him, I found I could not read his expression. 

“There is nothing else you want for you birthday?” he asked, his fingers tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. ‘Nothing else I could have’, I wanted to say, but what would be the point? The closest I would come to happiness onboard was to be a part of the crew, and continue to admire him from afar. Combined with the company of my friends, and the constant adventure of travelling the world, it would be enough. It had to be.

“There is nothing else I ever want, sir,” I answered, hoping he would not be able to detect the slight omission of truth in my statement. He sighed deeply.

“Amantes sunt amentes,” he smiled, almost reproachfully. I frowned, not knowing the expression, my one year of latin in school painfully insufficient to translate it. 

“In due time, Eleonora, you will have your wish.” Before I could begin to process what he’d said, he continued;

“However, I must warn you, it may be long before then. In the meantime, will you be content to continue on as before? I fear we may not be able to do without your company much longer, now that we’ve had a taste of it.” He said this in a joking tone, but his eyes remained serious. Not wanting to get carried away quite yet, I thought this over for a moment. Before completely making my mind up, I looked at him imploringly.

“Will you give me your word that you will tell me everything, when the time comes? Anything less will be an unbearable existence to me.” He looked back at me, his face earnest, yet solemn.

“I give you my word. In due time, you will know everything.” I could no longer contain myself, all the anxiety, and morose depression of the last weeks, and in truth months, ran off me in an instant. I threw my arms around his neck, and he swung me around while laughing. I cannot remember a single moment of purer happiness before that point, being in his arms, filled with such hope for the future. It only lasted a second or two, before he put me down, holding me at arms length by my shoulders. 

“Had I known giving in to temptation was rewarded so instantly, I may not have been able to resist for as long as I did,” he smiled, with a dangerous glint in his eyes. I was too ecstatic to pay his cryptic comments any mind at the moment.

“Thank you, Captain, thank you!” I simply beamed. He laughed again.

“Nothing has changed yet, miss, are you not getting ahead of yourself?”

“Everything has changed, Captain! Do you not see?” I said, laughing as well. I would finally belong! Perhaps this was the reason I had been transported here, through space and time, to finally find my place in the world. As long as I was sure it would happen, I could wait. He raised his eyebrows, the fond smile I so loved playing on his lips.

“Does that mean we get to celebrate you tonight, miss?” 

“I should like nothing better, Captain, for I have never in my life felt more like celebrating!” I exclaimed, hardly able to stand still. He just shook his head, seeming unable to fathom how much his promise meant to me, but smiling all the while.

“Then I shall see you tonight, at eight o’clock?” he asked. I nodded excitedly. 

“Will you kindly invite your companions as well, should you like to?” 

“Yes, sir, I will!” I started off down the companionway immediately, but turned around and rushed back to him. Clasping his hands again, I looked at him intently.

“Thank you, Odysseus.” His smile faded a little, and he put a hand on the back of my head, and placed a kiss in my hair. 

“Happy birthday, Eleonora.”

Chapter Text

I found my companions in the lounge, the professor having told them of the remarkable Arabian Tunnel, which would take us to European waters. When I came in, Pierre immediately arose, always the perfect gentleman. I’m sure he could tell by my expression that the meeting with the Captain had gone well, although he would never be able to guess to what extent. 

“Alors, mademoiselle, what did the Captain have to say?” he asked, encouraged by me being in a good mood, for the first time in weeks. Unable to share the full story with the others in the room, I went for the short version.

“It seems the crew is determined for us to celebrate my birthday this evening, gentlemen!” I smiled. Professor Aronnax and Ned Land broke out in a tirade of exclamations, berating me for not telling them it was my birthday, enquiring after what had been said, wondering what was to take place. I managed to answer all of their questions after the initial upset, and they all three congratulated me kindly, Conseil having caught enough of the conversation to understand what was going on. I thanked them heartily, before taking my leave, saying how I looked forward to seeing them that evening. 

I was sitting in my cabin, long since ready, again, there really wasn’t much to do but wash and get dressed. I’d tried to let my hair dry in an updo, to give it some kind of shape, and it looked fine, but I could have killed for a curler. It was silly, I know, but I missed getting ready how I would have back in my time. Just as I was lamenting the lack of a good eyeshadow, there was a knock at my door. 

“Come in,” I answered. It opened, and Ned Land appeared, looking slightly sheepish. He looked me over, and pulled the corner of his mouth, leaning against the door frame. 

“Ready to greet your subjects, your highness?” I rolled my eyes at the constant teasing, but smiled. 

“I was wondering if I might request an audience with you?” he asked.

“But of course. Anything for my loyal subjects,” I said, continuing the joke, nothing being able to dampen my joy today. He smiled, and closed the door behind him. 

“You see, I wanted to ask if you’d be much upset if I skipped the party?” he said apologetically. I looked at him, tilting my head.

“You don’t feel up to it?” 

“Not really, ma’am. I don’t need to tell you why.” He didn’t. I was well aware of the hostility he felt towards the Captain and his crew, whom he all considered his jailors, more or less. I put a hand on his arm.

“I won’t be upset at all, Ned, I understand. Although, I will miss your guitar playing,” I smiled sympathetically. He huffed.

“I’m sure old Nemo can take over troubadour duties for the evening.” 

“Somehow, I don’t think he can play Old Dan Tucker the way you do,” I grinned. This earned me a laugh.

“Right you are, ma’am! Don’t worry, I’ll play it for you some other time, promise,” he chuckled, looking at me affectionately. 

“Anyway, I wanted to give you this,” he said, and pulled something out of his pocket, handing it to me. I opened my hand, and saw in it a bracelet made from thin twine. In the center were three pearls, the middle one over a centimeter in diameter. They had been tied all around with tiny knots, making them resemble the antique glass floats of fishing nets. It was lovely. I looked up at him.

“Ned! This is beautiful! Where did you get it?” He shrugged a little, not meeting my eyes.

“I made it from some of the pearls I collected. You know, from the oyster bank,” he said, squirming a little.

“You made it? For me?” I exclaimed, greatly touched by his gesture. 

“Thought you needed some cheering up. I meant to give it to you one of these days, but then seeing as today’s your birthday and all… Anyway, they’re no fake pearls this time, I can tell you that!” he said, with a proud smile. I just stared at him, before pulling him into an embrace. 

“Oh, thank you, Ned! I absolutely love it!” I said, my voice touched with emotion. He chuckled again, and patted me on the back. 

“I’m glad. Come here, let me put it on you.” He tied it round my wrist with a skillful knot, and I held up my arm to admire it. I thought it looked superb with my dress, for once chosen for the occasion and not for convenience, and felt a lot better about my level of readiness. 

“Hope you have fun tonight, your highness, even if I’m not there,” he said with a wink, but before he could leave, I pulled his face down, and kissed him on the cheek. He looked stunned for a second, then gave me a bashful smile.

“You look beautiful, ma’am,” he said, before leaving in a hurry. I just shook my head, smiling at his sweetness. 

A little while after, there was another knock at my door, this time it was the professor and Conseil, come to escort me to the dining room. But not before they too had given me gifts. Conseil gave me a beautiful conch shell, the size of my whole hand, with a stunning pattern adorning its spiked spiral.

“Espècies: Pleauroploca clava. Famille: Fasciolariidae Fasciolariinae. Commande: Néograstropodes,” he declared. 

“A Persian Horse Conch, mademoiselle, from Ceylon,” the professor filled in. 

“Merci, Conseil, c’est magnifique!” I gave him a kiss on the cheek as well, truly overwhelmed by all the attention and kind gestures from the day, before placing the shell on the shelves above my desk. The professor looked a little uncomfortable, before handing me a piece of the seaweed paper used aboard the Nautilus. It was a drawing, in black squid ink, of me! Sitting on my perch below the crystal window of the lounge, I was looking out at a swarm of stunning medusas, my favourites, and I had a serene expression on my face. In the drawing, I was also wearing my dress, which draped over the bench seat, and my hair flowed down my shoulders. I looked beautiful! I looked up at the professor, amazed, but he shrugged his shoulders apologetically.

“Pardonnez-moi, mademoiselle, I did not know today was your birthday, and I had nothing else…” That was all he had time to say before I flung my arms around him, squeezing him tightly. When I let him go, he stared at me in confusion.

“No one’s ever drawn me before, sir…” I said sheepishly, before placing the image on the shelf as well. 

“A shame, mademoiselle, to forgo such a lovely subject,” Pierre said, and actually made me blush. I turned to them, thanking them profusely, and felt grateful for whatever power had placed me in the company of such kind men. They smiled at me, and Pierre offered me his arm, before we headed to the dining room together.

Chapter Text

Conseil, ever attentive, opened the door for us, and we stepped into the room. The sound that met us was deafening, the whole crew cheering in unison, and I was immediately whisked away from Aronnax, everyone wanting to congratulate me personally. My hand was shaken, my arms squeezed, my back dunked, and I was laughing all the while, trying to thank each and every one of them, but the task proved impossible. I was soon herded by the masses to the head of the table, my feet barely touching the floor, the chair was pulled out for me, and I was shoved into it. I was almost shrieking with laughter at their enthusiasm at this point, I had missed them so dearly, when I was suddenly awestruck by what was in front of me on the table. A tower made out of crystal glasses, enough for all of us, stood tall in the middle of the spread of beautiful dishes. 

“What’s this?” I asked in wonderment, looking at the smug faces around me. Jakub appeared on one side of the table, another crewman, I thought his name might be Andrei, on the other. They were each holding a bottle of champagne! Jakub grinned at me, but I could only stare, wide eyed, my mouth hanging open. In unison they popped the bottles, and poured the champagne so that it flowed from the glass at the top down to fill the rest. They had to open two more bottles each before the whole tower was sparking with golden liquid in the dimmed lights. I think my eyes must have been sparkling along with it. Jakub handed me the glass from the top, its stem a bit sticky from the show, and before long everyone had a glass in hand. A voice from my left got them started, and they sang me For she’s a jolly good fellow, but in Nautilese! I couldn’t help but laugh, and was absolutely beaming with joy, and clapped along to their gallant effort. At the last verse, they raised their glasses, and said in unison;

“Ren Eleonora!” I could feel my eyes filling with tears, was this really happening? Only this morning, I couldn’t have imagined this even in my wildest dreams. I raised my glass in response to them, and tried to remember what little Nautilese I had learnt.

“Tanoc, nish ver,” (“Thank you, my friends”) I said with a smile, almost breathlessly, and they all laughed fondly, while some cheered, at my attempt. 

Feeling awkward being the only person seated, and not wanting to encourage any more people to start calling me ‘your highness’, I arose at the first opportunity. I tried to look for Professor Aronnax, but I was swarmed by crewmen wanting to speak to me. Some addressed me in Nautilese, to which I could only smile and shake my head, but before long I spotted Oskar. I grabbed him unceremoniously, and he was his usual miserable self, being less than excited compared to some other crew, who did not see me every day. I forced him to translate for me all the same, saying he had to since it was my birthday, to which he rolled his eyes, but actually smiled a little. I eventually managed to spot Pierre, stood in a corner with Conseil, and they were speaking to the Captain. My heart skipped a beat, he must have been stood at the back before, since I had not seen him. Not wanting to desperately rush over, or even able to with the group surrounding me, I left them alone for the moment. I felt safe in the knowledge that at least Pierre would be happy with the current arrangement. And Conseil… well, was Conseil. To my dismay, I could not help but feel as though I was actually holding court, with so many people wanting to speak to me, and poor Oskar having to act as my herald at times. Putting the thought out of my head, I simply basked in finally being part of the companionship of the crew again, and even more truly so than before. It did not take long before my glass was empty, despite only sipping the champagne, for there had been quite a few people wanting a toast with me already. Before I had a chance to even look around for where I might find a bottle, once again asking myself where the alcohol of decided above-surface origin had come from, my glass was refilled from over my shoulder. I turned my head, but had to crane my neck upwards, where I was met by another big grin from Jakub. 

“Jakub! Thank you so much. You’re doing a splendid job with the refreshments, I’ve never seen such a show before!” I smiled, and I think he got the gist of it, since he nodded in acknowledgement. The thought struck me that I had a pressing question for him.

“Jakub, is Kumar here? I haven’t seen him,” I said, looking around again. Jakub answered, and Oskar translated for me.

“Han sitter där borta i hörnet,” (“He’s sat over there in the corner”) he said, both of them looking across the room. I thanked them, and told Oskar I would be alright for a while, but it didn’t seem as though he could care less. I was too cheerful to be affected by his attitude in the slightest. I managed to make my way through the crowd, although slowly, since every group would stop their conversations to talk to me when I approached. I got away with a quick toast with most of them, since I had all the time in the world to talk to them now, didn’t I? The thought filled me with contentment. I finally spotted Kumar, who was indeed sat in the corner, and looked to be sulking almost. His usually so jovial disposition had seemed completely changed since the fateful collision, and the last time I had spoken to him had been when he so woefully lamented the point of their mission.

“Excuse me, sir, is this seat taken?” I asked, nodding to the empty chair next to him. He looked up.

“If anyone else had asked, Madam, the answer would have been yes.” I smiled reproachfully at him.

“Kumar, you’re not allowed to be grumpy tonight. Whatever has happened, let it be until tomorrow” I said, sitting down. 

“Is that the Captain’s orders?” he asked with a tone of bitterness. I studied him, an idea of what the cause for his foul mood might be starting to taking shape in my mind.

“No, sir, mine. It’s my birthday, after all.”

“So it is. I wish you many happy returns on your birthday, Madam,” he said, in a kinder tone, and lifted his glass in a toast. Clinking it with mine, I tried to think how to approach the subject, but he preceded me.

“So, that stubborn goat finally came to his senses?” I stared at him in shock, before putting a hand over my mouth, trying to stifle a laugh.

“Kumar..!” He just shrugged.

“What’s he going to do? Not like he can find another chief officer, is it? But maybe he won’t bother to, since he refuses to listen to me no matter what. And why should he? Why listen to Kumar? It’s not as if I’m always correct in the end anyway!” he said, exasperated. 

“You have been in disagreement, then? About the mission?” I asked carefully.

“No, Madam, about you.” My eyes widened. 

“Pardon?” 

“I told him what his stubbornness would lead to! I told him you could not continue to live on the cusp of our existence, yet not be allowed to share it. It would be torture for anyone! But he is very protective of you, Madam, I have not seen him like this since… Regardless, I am glad he has now seen reason, if not through my doing,” he said, looking at me in earnest. I watched him intently, finding it difficult to take in what he was saying. 

“So… you wanted me to know about the mission?”

“For a little while, Madam, we thought you did! Although, we could not figure out who had told you. Oh, that was an interesting few days, to be sure. Even so, I was glad of it, so that we might finally welcome you to the crew properly. Then, when this turned out to not be the case, we all petitioned for you to be included in the secret, but the Captain would not hear of it. He thought you could be convinced to continue on as before. I admit, I am impressed with your resilience. He can be very convincing,” he said, with a meaning glance, before continuing with a chuckle;

“His face when you said you would not be coming with them to the oyster banks! It took all my strength not to laugh right then and there. Oh, he has his work cut out with you, for certain, Madam,” he said, now smiling. I was amazed to hear all this, and not quite sure what to make of it. So they had all wanted me to join them, apart from the Captain, out of concern for ‘my own good’, as he put it. Still too perplexed to figure out what to say, I just looked at him. Seeming to have regained some of his usual cheerfulness, Kumar continued;

“It seems you can be just as convincing as our cunning Captain, priya. When he went to incentivise you with this party earlier, I thought you might break, after the weeks you’ve had. But no. He told me what you had said, and though it was the same arguments I had put forward, somehow hearing it from you must have been more effective,” he said, and the look he gave me let me know there was an innuendo in there, but I could not understand what he was getting at. 

“So, you are right, Madam, I shall not be grumpy tonight. It is not every day we get a new crew member aboard the Nautilus!” he said, now grinning. As many times before, I could not put my gratitude towards him into words, so I took his hand, and said simply;

“What would I do without you, Kumar? Oh, I have missed you!” He chuckled again, and patted my cheek.

“I have missed you too, little Rani, but this time it was all your doing! Come now, let’s rejoin the party, your subjects are more than eager to speak with you after your absence.” I was too elated to reprimand him for this joke, and took his arm as we went up to a group of crewmen, who all cheered as we joined them. Among them, I saw William, who looked worn, but had put on a brave face. 

“William! Oh, I’m so happy to see you,” I exclaimed, and took his hand. He squeezed it with a smile. 

“Happy to see you too, ma’am. A happy birthday to you.” I smiled at him warmly, before we we were pulled into the group’s conversation. They consisted in majority of English-speakers, I knew them all quite well, and soon we were laughing together, enjoying each other’s company as if no time at all had passed.

Chapter Text

As Jakub came to join us with a fresh bottle of champagne, heartily welcomed, I ventured to ask Kumar;

“Tell me, sir, how have you acquired this supply? As much as I enjoy the Palmata liquor, I don’t need to tell you, this is an excellent change of pace.” He laughed at my joke, but before he could answer, another voice interjected;

“A fortunate find, miss, in a shipwreck outside the French coast. I thought it a shame to let it go to waste.” I felt my heart beating faster, and hoped to God I wasn’t blushing as I turned around. 

“Impeccable judgment, as always, Captain,” I smiled. Professor Aronnax was still with him, the poor man didn’t really know anyone else here, as Conseil seemed to have vanished. Captain Nemo smiled at me.

“Are you enjoying the celebration then, miss?” Now I was definitely blushing, and had to turn my eyes down for a second. 

“Sir, I cannot remember a better birthday in my life. I ought to turn twenty-nine more often,” I said, and as I looked up again, I met his triumphant gaze. 

“Twenty-nine?” he asked, his smile radiant, and all else in the room fell away from my consciousness. 

“Twenty-nine,” I replied, smiling, and held his gaze. We stayed like that for a moment, before Pierre interjected;

“Alors, this champagne is excellent, I must say, as a Frenchman!” I broke away from the Captain’s gaze, and grinned at my friend. I did not want him to feel excluded, since he had so kindly stayed.

“And so, your verdict weighs heaviest, monsieur Frenchman, but I am inclined to agree with you, despite being only a humble Swede,” I said, raising my glass to him.

“You’re awfully far from the soil, little swede,” said William next to me. I’m not sure anyone else understood the joke, but I laughed.

“Aye, but you don’t hear me complaining, as long as the champagne flows,” I said, clinking my glass to his. 

“What do you drink in Sweden, mademoiselle, if not champagne?” Professor Aronnax asked me. I grinned.

“Oh, we distill the water of life, mon ami, the Aqua Vitae. But I fear this would be a very different gathering if we were drinking Akvavit,” I said with a look of worry, thinking of some of the traditional crayfish parties I’d been to. William and the others laughed at this. 

“Oh, Oskar has told us all about the Akvavit, ma’am. He even taught us a silly little song you sing when you drink it!” William said, calling over to Oskar and asking him something in Nautilese. Oskar rolled his eyes, and I think I was relieved to see that perhaps his attitude was nothing personal towards me, but he came over all the same. William seemed to implore him to do something, and he looked at him with a tired expression, but then turned to me. 

“Vi kan inte sjunga Helan går till champagne!” (“We can’t sing Helan går while drinking champagne!”) he told me.  I agreed wholeheartedly, this was not the moment. He turned to the Captain, asking him something, before I could stop him. I could imagine what he had suggested, and was sure Captain Nemo would disapprove, but to my surprise, he seemed to concede, and Oskar left us. The Captain turned to me with a grin, well aware of my astonishment, and said;

“When better to experience the Swedish culture, than tonight?” I just shook my head in exasperation.

“I want you to remember that this wasn’t my idea!” I warned him, still not completely convinced of his assurances that he did not blame me for the previous parties. He only laughed, and looked at me with gleaming eyes. Oskar returned with a tray of sherry glasses, filled with undiluted Palmata liquor. I sighed.

“Oh, Christ, here we go.” As we each took a glass, I could see Pierre look somewhere between elated and terrified. I wondered what kind of drunk he was. I wondered if he knew what kind of drunk he was. But no, he was Parisian, and I sometimes forgot he couldn’t possibly be as innocent as he looked. Oskar lifted his glass to me, and we started out;

Helan går,

sjung hopp fallerirallan lej,

helan går,

sjung hopp faderallan lej

Och den som inte helan tar

han inte heller halvan får

Helan går!

The others did their best to sing along to the silly song, but I have tried to teach it to non-Swedish speakers before, with no success. Fortunately, it only makes it sound all the more silly, and even Oskar had to laugh as William, Pierre, Kumar, Jakub, even the Captain, and the others attempted it. I could see the rest of the room look on with mixed expressions of confusion and delight. As we got to the end of the song, we raised our glasses, and downed their contents. Only coughing slightly, me and Oskar finished the last line together;

Sjung hopp faderallan lej!

The room was quiet for a second, before erupting into roaring laughter. I did not have a chance to recover before apparently the rest of the crew, feeling left out of the fun, joined in for the next round. I met Oskar’s eyes with terror in mine, but he only shrugged, and we started it over again. 

“Chérie, dis-moi, what is the song about?” asked Aronnax, laughing, after we had most unfortunately been made to sing it for a third time. I had had to put a stop to there being a fourth time, at least for now, as the commander of our vessel seemed to have forsaken his duties for the evening. I looked at Oskar with a frown.
“Vad handlar den om?” (“What’s it about?”) He shrugged unhelpfully. I turned back to Pierre.

“It says if you don’t take the whole one, you’re also not allowed to take the half of it,” I explained, also unhelpfully. 

“Good advice!” said William, mightily cheered up, and Pierre nodded in agreement. I had to give him credit, he was not the light-weight I had taken him for. 

“I believe I like it almost as much as the other Swedish song you taught me,” added Captain Nemo cheerfully. I refused to blush from the mention of that night, sitting so close to him, and the memory of the fight that followed helped my resolve. The difference to what he was like now was night and day. He had been nothing but in his very best mood all day, and had I not been so giddy over everything else, this alone would have been enough to brighten my whole existence. 

“I’m glad to hear it, Captain. You might need to practice your pronunciation ever so slightly, but I think you all did a fine job of it,” I praised my friends, trying not to focus on the Captain only. Kumar, now ruddy from the alcohol, put an arm around my shoulders.

“We will need to make a detour to Sweden, to pick up some of the Aqua Vitae, Madam.” 

“Considering how you’re faring on just champagne and Palmata liquor, sir, I would strongly advice against it!” I laughed, the group jeering. He gave me a smirk, and squeezed my shoulders.

Chapter Text

“Mademoiselle, I have not seen your bracelet before, is it a birthday present?” Pierre enquired sincerely, and I looked down at my wrist. I tried to answer him as casually as I could, but felt a bit awkward.

“Oh, yes, Ned gave it to me earlier.” He looked a little surprised, and I saw Captain Nemo exchange a glance with Kumar. 

“Ah, c’est beau,” Pierre answered quickly, realising he had somehow stepped in it, although he could not have known to which extent. If nothing else, he did of course know the tense relationship between mr. Land and the Captain.

“The harpooner could not join us this evening?” Nemo asked calmly, but I could detect how pleased he was at this, even if the bracelet must have been a blemish for the record. 

“No, he was feeling tired, I’m afraid,” I replied, an obvious lie, but readily welcomed for the sake of us continuing our pleasant evening. 

“I’ve also received a remarkable… was it a Persian Horse Conch, professor?” I hastened to change the subject. Pierre nodded, grateful that I had saved us from his unwitting blunder. 

“... From mr. Conseil, as well as the most beautiful portrait from Professor Aronnax, although he has been far too generous to the subject!” I admonished him jokingly. 

“Not at all, chérie, you know that as a naturalist, my drawings are always faithful to reality,” he told me kindly. Captain Nemo somehow still seemed slightly stiff. Surely Ned’s gift had not made him think I had been anything but honest when I assured him we were only friends? I hoped I would not have to convince him of my pretend feelings for Aronnax. If anything, my close friendship with Pierre must have been what led him to assume them in the first place. 

“You yourself has reprimanded Professor Aronnax so severely in the past for not owning up to his great artistic skills, miss. Surely you are not contradicting him now that he is finally admitting to them?” said the Captain, suddenly cheerful again. His statement put us on the spot, and embarrassingly made us both blush, which seemed to please him immensely, the fiend. We were rescued by a distraction from across the room, where a group of crewmen broke out into song. Clearly the result of Oskar’s bright idea had started to take effect. I smiled, watching them with glee, but would soon come to regret this, as one of them spotted me, and pointed with a shout. The rest turned around, with diabolical grins, and my smile faded. 

“Oh, you’re in for it now, ma’am,” said William with a shake of the head.

“In for what?” I asked him, but he only smiled. I turned around to my friends.

“In for what?!” 

“Madam, I did warn you the crew had missed you,” said Kumar with a grin. If I had not trusted them so completely, I might have worried over the meaning of this. However, I would soon learn that being part of the crew meant being met with slightly more lax manners than before. I stared wide-eyed as the group approached me. 

“You wanted to be part of the crew. Best earn your stay,” said a deep voice in my ear. I could not help but feel a shudder of pleasure go through me at his closeness, and the way he had whispered these words. I turned my face, meeting Captain Nemo’s eyes only inches away, and looked at him questioningly. He only smirked, and raised his eyebrows. 

“What..?” I began to ask. 

“Sing, Eleonora,” he said, straightening. His command was repeated from across the crew, all looking at me expectantly. I frowned.

“Why should I sing, when it’s my birthday! Shouldn’t it be you-”

Before I could protest further, I was hoisted up into the air, the giant Jakub placing me on his shoulder. I shrieked, but the crew just laughed. Had the ceilings not been so high, I would have hit my head, but there was no risk of that now. I could not even have reached up to touch it. 

“Come now, we need to be able to hear you!” laughed Captain Nemo. 

“Damn you all, this is outrageous!” I cursed, but couldn’t help but laugh with them. 

“Put me down, I’m scared of heights!” This was only met by more howling laughter. Fuck. Okay then. 

“Fine, but only if you can keep up this pace!” I said definitely, and started clapping to the quick beat of Cecilia. 

“Not you!” I shouted as Jakub let go of me to clap along, and he grinned at me. Unfortunately, they managed to keep up almost instantly, and I conceded with a shrug of my shoulders. 

Celia, you’re breaking my heart

You’re shaking my confidence daily

Oh, Cecilia, I’m down on my knees

I’m begging you please to come home

Come on home

Making love in the afternoon

With Cecilia

Up in my bedroom

I got up to wash my face

When I come back to bed

Someone’s taken my place

I could hear cheering at the raunchy lyrics, and I smiled smugly. Easy crowd. I spotted Aronnax, watching me in wide-eyed admiration, never having been present at one of the gatherings to hear me sing, and I winked at him. 

Celia, you’re breaking my heart

You’re shaking my confidence daily

Oh, Cecilia, I’m down on my knees

I’m begging you please

Come on home

Come on home

Jubilation,

She loves me again

I fall on the floor and I’m laughing

Jubilation

She loves me again

I fall on the floor and I’m laughing

Oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh oh-oh-oh-oh

I made a dramatic bow from up on my high perch, and expected to be let down, but to my horror I saw the sherry glasses being refilled. Oh no. 

“I’m not singing it without Oskar!” I yelled, and the poor man was pushed forward through the crowd, having no choice in the matter. 

“Du kan sitta på hans andra axel!” (“You can sit on his other shoulder!”) I told him, pointing to it. My meaning had been obvious, and I saw several people doubling with laughter. Oskar only shook his head, exasperated. Jakub reached up to give me a glass, and off we went again. I would say that the fourth time’s the charm, but the song was butchered as badly as the other three. No matter, I don’t think I’d ever had so much fun in my life. Finishing my glass, and then the song, I told Jakub sternly.

“Now put me down, before I hurl all over you!” Kumar put a hand on his shoulder and laughingly let his giant of a man know he could let me down. He got onto one knee, and suddenly every crewman was a perfect gentleman, helping me down. I huffed loudly, and fanned myself. 

“Hope you’re happy, now that you’ve had your fun!” 

“For now!” jeered Captain Nemo, which was met by more laughter. I gave him a reproaching look, but couldn’t help but smile. Feeling emboldened by my apparent popularity, and perhaps by the fourth glass of liquor, I went up to him.

“So, Captain, have I earned my stay?” I smiled confidently. He smiled back, with more fondness than I had ever seen before, making my heart swell. He looked at Kumar with raised eyebrows.

“What do you say, my friend?” 

“I would say so, yes!” replied his chief officer with a chuckle.

“Then so you have, miss,” answered the Captain, and I realised this was the proud commander admitting that Kumar had been right. I hoped whatever rift between them that I had unwittingly caused was resolved. 

“Would you like to open your gift, Eleonora?” Captain Nemo asked me.

Chapter Text

I looked at him in confusion.

“My gift? Sir, I thought you said it would be long before-”

“No, miss, I had something more material in mind,” he interrupted me with another fond smile. I furrowed my brows.

“Captain, I am more than happy with all you have done already, I need no-” But he had already strode away, soon returning with a large, flat box. I stared at him, and he watched me expectantly. I stood frozen, and he had to coax me before I dared to touch it.

“Go on, open it,” he said, his voice warm. I reached up, forcing my hands to remain steady as I did so, and carefully lifted the lid. My breath hitched as I was met by the glistening display inside. A necklace with rows of enormous aquamarines, surrounded by diamonds, all inlaid in delicate gold, laid on the soft cushioning of the box. I stood stunned, mesmerised, hardly daring to breathe. It was the kind of necklace I had never before seen outside of museums. 

“Herregud…” I breathed.

“They’re your colours. The blue for your eyes, and gold for your hair,” said the Captain, his voice almost a whisper. I looked up at him, our smiles now faded, but his expression spoke of something more than fondness. As I tried to read him, all else was forgotten, nothing existed but his dark eyes. They drew me in, closer to the abyss, and I thought I might drown, but did not care, I longed for it. I was pulled back to the surface by his voice.

“Do you like it?” 

“‘Do I like it?’” I repeated, still dazed, as in a dream. 

“I love…” I only just managed to stop myself, remembering the necklace, the dining room, the people around us. I forced myself to look away, back down at the sparkling stones.

“I love it,” I said, taking a deep breath. I carefully caressed the gems, barely able to understand how they were real. It was a stunning piece of jewellery. 

“I’m glad,” he said, his voice touched with emotion. He set the box down, and went to put the necklace on me. The feel of his graceful fingers on my neck sent shivers down my spine. As he stepped back to look at me, his face beamed with joy. 

“Come on, let’s see it!” a voice called from behind me. I realised the room had gone quiet, and as I turned around, I saw every face looking at me expectantly. A few gasps could be heard, even a couple of impressed whistles, and I felt my face burning. It was all too much. Kumar, my constant saviour, gave a shout, and the crew reluctantly returned to their conversations. He turned back to us, beaming. After looking me over, he declared with a pleased voice;

“You carry it well, little Rani.” I saw the Captain shoot him a glance, but could not discern its meaning. I was completely lost for the right words, and only stupidly asked;

“I do?” Both him and the Captain laughed at me. I must have looked terrified. 

“You do,” answered the Captain, his normal fond smile back. 

“Vous êtes magnifique, chérie,” said Aronnax in earnest admiration, and I smiled gratefully. 

“I don’t know what to say,” I said in all honesty, turning back to the Captain. He exchanged a glance with Kumar. 

“I believe your face says it all, priya,” said he, looking a little smug. 

“Besides, we found it did not really suit any of us that well, so best you wear it instead,” he added, finally breaking the tension, and I laughed. 

“Better not fall in the water, wearing that, ma’am. You’ll sink like a rock,” came William’s voice. 

“Alright, I’ll do my best,” I answered laughingly. Having recovered slightly, I felt I still had to try and thank the Captain somehow, no matter how insufficient words were.

“Captain, I… I’ve never even seen anything like this before, let alone received such a gift,” I said, only meeting his eyes briefly. For the second time that day, he put his hand under my chin, lifting my face up. 

“If you feel it is too much, I suppose I could take it back, however, it would be a shame to leave it in the box when it looks so lovely around your neck,” he said, and I felt my face flush again. Unable to stand any more of the tension, I had no choice but to break it myself.

“No, no, it’s just… How on Earth will you best it for next year, it being my thirtieth?” I asked, in mock exasperation, and he threw his head back with a laugh. Putting his hand on my cheek, he looked into my eyes, which immediately rescinded the success of breaking any tension on my part. 

“I have a year to think of something,” he said warmly. 

“When is your birthday, Captain?” I asked breathlessly. With a coy smile, he withdrew his hand.

“August.” My eyes widened in shock, hardly believing I’d actually heard him right. He grinned at my surprise, always enjoying being able to shock people, but then his face turned serious.

“Quid pro quo, Eleonora. We have no secrets amongst ourselves aboard the Nautilus. When the time comes, I will tell you everything, but you must also do the same for me. Are you prepared to do so?” In truth, I’d expected nothing less, and no matter how shocking his tale would be, I imagined I had him beat. I just shrugged, ‘burn that bridge when we come to it’, or something like that.

“Very well, Hannibal. Quid pro quo.” He raised his eyebrows.

“Is Odysseus no longer enough, miss? Am I now also the Carthaginian general? I must say, I’m not sure the likening is quite as apt.” I had to laugh, finally having the upper hand with him being the one not understanding the reference, but then again, how could he have? 

“I believe you are many things, Captain,” I answered, trying to mimic the cryptic way in which he would always answer me. I think I must have succeeded, for he frowned slightly, and I turned back to the rest of our company with a smug smile. William seemed to have just discovered that Professor Aronnax had been travelling through the States prior to us landing aboard the Nautilus, and was interrogating him of all that was happening in his homeland. Pierre was as always more than happy to oblige, and the two were soon enveloped in a lively discussion. 

Although I managed to refrain from any more of the undiluted Palmata liquor, the supply of champagne seemed endless, and I soon found myself blissfully inebriated, along with the rest of the room. I, or rather my necklace, would often end up being admired by any group of men I went to talk to, but any feelings of embarrassment were gone in my state, and I happily indulged them by twirling around. They would cheer and clap, but there was nothing boorish about they way they did this, it only felt kind and encouraging. They treated me like a long lost sister, finally joining their brotherhood, and the already overwhelming feelings of bliss magnified. I felt I was home.

Chapter Text

Soon back by the professor’s side, steadying myself on his arm, I listened as he talked of Paris, and of his office by the Botanical Gardens.

“Tell me, sir, are the elephants still there?” asked the Captain.

“Bien-sûr, Capitaine, as far as I am aware, Castor et Pollux are alive and well,” answered Pierre. I felt my head spinning a little, suddenly remembering having read about the poor twin elephants, and how they had met the same fate as the other zoo animals during the siege of Paris. At least they would stay alive and well for another two years, I supposed. 

“I’m glad. I remember them well from my time in Paris,” said the Captain, in an almost dreamy voice. 

“You went to the Botanical Gardens, Capitaine?” asked Pierre, incredulous, and I could easily imagine his thoughts. Was there a chance they had met before, having walked the same streets, young men together? The concept was baffling. 

“But of course, professor, often. It was one of my favourite parts of the city,” he answered generously. I could see Pierre almost swooning, and had to step in. 

“Why the special interest in these elephants, sir? Were you planning on kidnapping them, taking them across the Alps, perhaps?” I questioned him with feigned suspicion. It had the desired effect, since Pierre managed to collect himself, and stare at me. The Captain only rolled his eyes at me, scoffing.

“I think I preferred your previous comparison, miss! I cannot for the life of me understand this one,” he told me, shaking his head. 

“Oh dear, that must be difficult, being likened to someone with no clue why,” I said innocently. Kumar snorted, and the Captain gave both him and me a tired look, but couldn’t exactly say anything. I could not precisely decipher the look Kumar gave him back, but Captain Nemo smiled knowingly, and I was just thankful they had apparently made amends. Just then, I was approached yet again by a group of the crew, and one of them asked me in a thick Irish accent if I might sing what had apparently been his favourite song so far, from all the way back at Marco’s party, Low bar. 

“Very well, as long as I can do it from here, I don’t think I can take any more acrobatics tonight!” I said, shooting Jakub a worried glance. I was still made to stand on a chair, for the volume in the room had increased significantly through the course of the evening, and only about half of it was interested enough to stop their conversations to listen at this point. I took care to change the word ‘neon’ of the last line to ‘candle’, this time. Once I finished the song, Conor, as he told me his name was, thanked me profusely, but was interrupted. 

“Señorita, the lions, por favor!” Marco shouted from further back, and I could see Javier standing tall behind him, nodding in agreement. He said something else to another man, who had translated for them in the past.

“Marco says you still owe him a song, señorita.” It was true, I had said so as I left his birthday party that time, two long months ago.

“Then I must stay true to my word! But do you all remember it?” I asked my audience, and they cheered affirmatively. 

“Professor, you’ll get the hang of it, just follow along with the rest!” I told my friend, who looked in equal parts fearful and excited. We had not got to even the second verse, I think, before the whole crew had joined in, abandoning their banter for a moment. A roaring success again, I went to step down from the chair as the crew congratulated each other on their musical talents. I hoped it wouldn’t be long before they learnt and could join in in more songs, and I vowed to learn any songs they already knew, so that I didn’t have to continue singing alone. Kumar gallantly helped me down, and I was surprised as he pressed a fervent kiss to my cheek. I stared at him in confusion, and he seemed almost flustered, but still smiled wide.

“Your presence has been sorely lacking us, priya,” he said, and I beamed at him.

“The feeling is mutual, my friend,” I said, and kissed his cheek in return. 

“Oh, I wouldn’t do that, ma’am-” I heard William warn me, before I felt myself lifted up, and placed a good few feet away. I looked up to see Jakub stood between me and Kumar, his arms crossed, a frown on his face, but his eyes glinting in good humour. I held up my hands in a disarming gesture, before he turned around and gave Kumar a proper kiss. The group all laughed, except for Aronnax, who was stood frozen, absolute shock written on his face. He glanced at the Captain, who only gave him a smirk back, and said serenely;

“Un avantage à quitter la société, monsieur.” I watched the poor professor flush red, and saw this as definite proof that this was the first mention of the subject between him and the Captain, any suspicion on my part of the opposite had been wrong. Of course, the cryptic statement answered none of my questions about the Captain’s feelings towards Aronnax, and if anything, might have raised similar ones in him. For the moment, he only stared straight ahead, clear wonder written on his face. The rest of us continued on our merry conversing as if nothing had happened, and eventually, Pierre seemed to have recovered enough to join in again.

“I think we ought to commemorate this occasion, don’t you, Kumar?” asked the Captain suddenly. Kumar nodded in agreement, and said something to two crewmen next to him. Before I knew what was happening, a large, antique camera was brought into the dining room. Or well, a hypermodern camera by their standards. Kumar assembled the crew, some having to get down on one knee, others jumping up onto a mate’s back under raucous laughter, to make sure we all fit in the frame. Eventually we got there, and Captain Nemo went to take the photo, but I stopped him. 

“Sir, surely the Captain should be in the photo as well?” 

“Miss, someone has to be behind the camera, unfortunately.” I narrowed my eyes. 

“Do they, though?” I asked conspiratorially, and he frowned in confusion.

“I’m afraid we do not have a long enough shutter cable to give us any other option.” I smirked at him.

“Just trust me.” I made him go stand with his crew, before kneeling in front of the camera, within reach of the cable.

“Say cheese!” I shouted over my shoulder, before squeezing the shutter, grinning into the camera.

Chapter Text

“Huh, I wonder why we never thought to do that,” said Kumar, as we were all admiring the quickly developed photograph. Although it was far less formal than any other I’d seen, I found it hilarious seeing my face from the normal selfie angle, in the foreground of a 19th-century portrait of a ship’s crew. I couldn’t help but make the following comment, despite no one else being able to appreciate the joke;

“Yes, I wonder if it’ll catch on.” The photo was passed around the room to be viewed, most everyone seeming pleased with how it had turned out. I was too, feeling it somehow cemented my being accepted into the crew. Soon though, people started dropping off to bed, but not before coming up to thank me, wishing me happy returns, and a good night. I could only give them my heartfelt thanks back, for everything. As I stood contemplating my new reality, the others in some lively discussion about I don’t know what, Captain Nemo came up to me. 

“You look happy, Eleonora,” he said with a warm smile. I returned it in earnest.

“I am, Captain,” I said, words being unable to encompass to what degree. Not having the energy to even try to express my feelings of joy, I settled for a joke.

“As happy as any woman turning the frightening age of twenty-nine might be! Although, the gifts make it bearable,” I added, absent-mindedly caressing my necklace. He laughed.

“I’m glad to have alleviated some of your pain, miss.” 

“What colour is the diamonds for, Captain?” I asked, before I could stop myself. His smile turned teasing, before answering.

“Your white skin, of course.” I huffed.

“You think this is white, sir? I fear the day we sail for colder climates, I shall turn completely transparent!” I said, and unfortunately it wasn’t far from the truth. He gave a hearty laugh, which earned us a few looks, but he paid them no mind. 

“Well, I suppose no one is perfect,” he said, smiling fondly at me. Normally I imagine I would have flustered at his compliment, but in my tired, drunk state I only watched his beautiful face with perfect serenity. 

“Very close to it, at least, Odysseus,” I said, my eyes gleaming, and had I not known better, I would have said it was him that flustered from my play on his words. He regained his composure before I could be certain. A shadow passed over his face, and he put a hand on my shoulder.

“I advice you wait to come to your final conclusions, before you have all the information, miss,” he said in all seriousness. I sobered a little, and tried to read his expression, but he turned away from me. Soon after, the last few of us all agreed that it was time to retire, and bid each other good night in the fondest terms. 

As Pierre walked me back to my cabin, perhaps because he is a gentleman, perhaps because he was worried I was too drunk to find my way, we spoke of the evening. 

“Mademoiselle, I had no idea… I could not imagine… well, any of this,” he said in wonderment, gesturing vaguely, not being able to express what an eye-opener the party had been for him, but I understood. 

“I’m glad you were finally able to experience it all, my friend,” I said, leaning my head on his shoulder, as we walked arm in arm. I was in total bliss, all sense of my previous depression feeling ages gone. 

“Oui, moi aussi, chérie. You will not tell Conseil how much we drank?” he asked, suddenly worried. I laughed at the thought.

“It’ll be our secret, professor, I promise.” It’s not like I had the vocabulary to do so anyway. There was something I wanted to ask Pierre, and hoped it would not make him uncomfortable.

“Do you really think you might have met the Captain in Paris at some point?” I asked carefully. He thought for a moment, then said with a slight smile;

“I think I would have remembered if I had, chérie.” I understood his meaning perfectly. Captain Nemo was not a man to be forgotten easily, even if one had only passed him in the street. We were silent for a little ways, before he spoke up again;

“He must truly hold you in high regard, mademoiselle, to give you a necklace like that.” I blushed slightly. He was too good of a person to sound bitter over this fact, even though I knew he must be jealous of the unbelievable attention bestowed upon me by the Captain. I would tell him tomorrow of the fact that this had not only been a birthday party, but also technically my inauguration to the crew. In the meantime, I still wished to ease some of the tension he must be feeling.

“You remember the Captain’s words, Pierre, he told us that he is infinitely wealthy. And besides, aboard the Nautilus its only value is its aesthetic one,” I said, hoping my words would comfort him. 

“I asked him where it came from, if it too was a rescued treasure from a sunken ship, but he only gave me one of those smiles, vous connaissez,” he said, still without a hint of bitterness. I did know the smile well, and how frustrating it could be. 

“Ever mysterious, our Captain,” I said simply, and we were silent again. As we got to my door, he looked into my eyes.

“I do not know what has changed, chérie, but I am happy for you,” he said earnestly. I stared at him, and realised what he must think. I did not know how to tell him, this wholly kind-hearted man, who could wish me happiness despite it meaning his own misery, that it was not what he thought. I needed to think carefully on how to relay the story without giving away too much of my feelings, and was well aware I would not be able to do so in my current state. Although it pained me to leave him in what must doubtless be feelings of anguish, the full explanation would have to wait. Still, I had to give him some relief. 

“Mon ami, thank you for your kind words, but nothing has changed, except my hope for our future onboard,” I said, and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. He smiled slightly.

“Alors, mademoiselle. Bonne nuit.”

Chapter Text

Waking up late the next morning, I at first wondered if it had all been but a dream, and I was still trapped in limbo, before my eyes fell to the object on my nightstand as I turned on the lights. Glistening fiercely in white, blue and gold, was the proof of yesterday’s events taking place. Captain Nemo’s promise, the party, my acceptance into the crew, it was all true. At first I just stared at the sparkling gemstones, trying to take it all in, and then filled with warmth and joy. I laid in bed for a moment, just basking in the feeling. As I got up, I realised no breakfast had been delivered this morning, and smirked. Perhaps poor Oskar had finally been relieved of his duties. All the better, if it meant I was expected to join the others in the mess hall from now on. The particulars of my changed situation had not yet been discussed, and I wondered what duties I might be able to take on, for surely ‘songbird’ could not be the full extent of my job description. I washed in the sink quickly, before dressing in my normal crewman’s outfit, ready to take on the day, when I noticed the bracelet still on my wrist. I was sure the professor would understand my decision to join the crew, especially after last night, but I dreaded Ned’s reaction. Captain Nemo’s sudden change of heart had come so unexpectedly that I had had no time to think of how I would tell my friends. I thought there was a small change that Pierre would even ask whether the same offer might not be extended to him as well. But how could Ned Land ever forgive us, if we were to stay aboard willingly, even if given the chance to escape? I looked at the bracelet, then glanced back to the gemstone necklace, and hoped he might find it in his heart to understand. Still, I did not have high hopes of it. 

Putting aside these worries for the moment, I almost skipped downstairs to the mess hall, humming The lion sleeps tonight. The late morning hour meant it was almost empty, a few hungover stragglers sat together at one table, but they still managed to greet me enthusiastically. I had my breakfast with them, as we pieced together different languages to have some sort of conversation, before going up to the platform where I thought I would find my friends. I did indeed, together with Captain Nemo, and a group of crewmen readying the skiff. There seemed to be some sort of commotion, and the group was almost too preoccupied to give me even a ‘good morning’, before getting in the boat.

“Vous ne venez pas, Capitaine?” asked the professor.

“Non, monsieur, mais je vous souhaite une bonne chasse,” replied the Captain, crossing his arms. As the skiff set off, I watched in confusion.

“What’s going on, Captain?”

“A dugong, miss, which your harpooner has offered to hunt down for us,” he answered, and I rolled my eyes at his dig, which made him smirk. 

“It seems a shame to hunt such a rare animal, sir,” I said reprimandingly.

“Maybe so, miss, but it will furnish us with excellent red meat, to which I think you will not be opposed,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

“Ah, well in that case, there’s a most worthy reason for it to meet its end,” I conceded, and the Captain chuckled at my hypocrisy.

“I thought it would also be a welcome distraction for the harpooner, seeing as how he was unable to join us yesterday,” he said, and I marvelled at this unusual thoughtfulness for mr. Land’s wellbeing. 

“That’s very considerate of you, Captain,” I said gratefully. We watched the hunt in the distance in silence, before I thought to take the opportunity to clarify some things.

“Is there anything I might do to make myself useful onboard, sir? What is to be my position amongst the crew?” I asked, eager to start as soon as possible. He studied me for a moment, thinking it over, before answering.

“Miss, as pleased as we are to have you join us, it is not yet time for you to take on any official duties. Many of them would be too revealing of the nature of the mission,” he said solemnly. I badly wanted to know the reason why he could not yet tell me everything, but thought at the same time that when he did, I would have to give up my secrets, the outcome of which I did not know what it would be, so I resigned. 

“I understand, Captain. What am I to do in the meantime?” I hoped there might still be some task I could be assigned, but his smile told me the crew were managing everything already.

“For now, the pleasure of your company will suffice,” he said kindly.

“I see, you wish for me to be the court jester?” I joked, and he laughed. 

“Your words, not mine!” he teased. 

“Very well, sir, as long as Kumar would stop calling me ‘little Rani’,” I scoffed. He turned away from me, and said in a more serious tone;

“Yes, Kumar has a tendency to get ahead of himself.” He bowed to me, and left me to watch the rest of the spectacle alone. I was rather worried at one point, when it looked as though the skiff would be overturned, but the brave hunters soon returned, their prize in tow. I congratulated them, but refused to stay for the slaughter. 

“Professor Aronnax, sir, may I please speak with you?” I asked Pierre, and I could see he had been expecting this. We went down the companionway, but I surprised him when I invited him into my cabin, rather than going into the library or salon. I didn’t want to risk being interrupted. 

“Mademoiselle, is this not rather improper-”

“Professor, you heard the Captain. We enjoy the benefits of having left society behind, remember?” I interrupted him with a sarcastic smile. He was a bit flustered, but agreed. I offered him the chair, and could see him eyeing the giant necklace on the nightstand. I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it, where was I supposed to keep an item like that? I went to sit down on the bed, but found I could not stay seated, and instead started pacing the room. Now that the time had come, I didn’t know where to start my tale. 

“Professor, are you happy aboard the Nautilus?” I blurted out, despite not really having meant to start off so bluntly. Pierre was understandably startled.

“Je- mademoiselle, I’m not sure I… There are so many aspects to life onboard, so I cannot say one way or the other-”

“Well I am, professor. More so than I could have ever imagined. I enjoy our life onboard, the things we get to experience, and the companionship I have found with the people here. I feel as though I have come home. However, the circumstances our stay is unbearable, and so, I asked the Captain to be made part of the crew,” I told him frankly, and he looked at me in stunned silence. 

“At first he refused, but I think after seeing the state I’ve been in for the past weeks, he must have changed his mind, for yesterday he finally conceded. I am to know of their mission in due time, he has promised me, and I look forward to sharing in their purpose, whatever it may be!” I continued, almost angry now, despite Pierre not having said a word. He was silent for a long time, and I finally sank down on the bed, suddenly exhausted. I felt the weight on the mattress as he sat down next to me. 

“Chérie, how can you be so certain you will feel the same, once you do know their secrets? There must be a reason for the Captain hiding it from us with such fierceness. I myself fear it is not a noble cause,” he said, so gently that I couldn’t possibly be annoyed with him questioning my decision. 

“How could it not be, though? How could these men be anything but righteous?” I said, but the fire was gone from my voice. The truth was, there was a small part of me that feared he might be right, but I could not voice those fears even to myself. 

“I cannot know, chérie, it is only speculation, based on what little evidence we have,” he said, putting an arm around me. 

“I understand your point, Pierre, but I must take my chances. I trust them with all my heart, and I have no other option, I’m afraid,” I said. 

“What do you mean, mademoiselle? Would you not come with us, were Ned Land to succeed in his plans?” How could I tell him that I had no life awaiting me anywhere else, that if I left the Nautilus I would be completely alone in a world that wasn’t my own? 

“Would you go?” I asked him instead. When he did not answer me, I looked up at him.

“We will be in Europe by tomorrow evening. If there is a chance to leave, will you take it?” I implored, and the thought that he might soon be gone filled me with cold fear. He looked at me with a melancholy expression.

“I do not know, chérie. I do not want to, in truth, not yet. You asked me if I was happy onboard, and I am. There is so much to see still, and while we are not free to go, there is another type of freedom to be enjoyed aboard,” he said solemnly, and I wondered if he meant the acceptance that awaited him, were he to choose to make his disposition known. We sat there for a long time, contemplating the difficult decisions we would eventually be forced to make.

Chapter Text

The next day, as we eagerly awaited making the miraculous journey through Captain Nemo’s Arabian Tunnel, Pierre would point out the landmarks visible from our ship, the most remarkable being Mount Sinai from the Bible. We also got to witness the strange phenomenon that had given the Red Sea its name, which looked truly bizarre. Evening came without us still having reached Suez, and me and the professor went up to the platform to investigate how far away we might be. The night was dark, no electrical lights from the cities existed to be seen as they would have been in my time, but we spotted a faint glow about a mile away.

“A floating lighthouse,” came a deep voice from the darkness. We startled, not having seen the Captain, and he smirked at our surprise. 

“That’s the floating signal light of Suez,” he continued without any apology. 

“We’ll be at the entrance to the tunnel before long.” This made us forget all else.

“It can’t be very easy to enter,” said Pierre in admiration. The Captain told us that no, it wasn’t, and so he would direct the Nautilus himself. As it got ready to sink beneath the waves, we went back down together, and started to head off, but the Captain stopped us.

“My friends, would you like to go with me to the wheelhouse?” We were both elated at the offer, neither of us having dared asked, but happily went with him. Finally seeing this part of the ship was fascinating, and at the helm stood Javier. He looked surprised to see us, but then grinned at me. He exchanged a few words with the Captain in a joking tone, but I did not know what any of them meant. 

“Now, let’s look for our tunnel,” said the Captain. He pressed a button, and the Nautilus slowed down. This reminded me of the engineering marvel it truly was, something I all too often forgot, being so used to modern technology. I knew the professor needed no reminder, constantly aware of all the scientific aspects of our everyday life onboard. For about an hour, we watched the strange plant and animal life of the sheer cliff face passing by outside, before Captain Nemo took the helm himself. Watching the Nautilus’s commander steer his beloved ship, of which he was, as he had said himself, its captain, builder and engineer all in one, was somewhat of a transcendent experience. His graceful hands on the wheel, and the muscles moving beneath his thin byssus shirt as he maneuvered it, had me transfixed. He stood tall, his posture regal as always, and his face serene, despite the challenge ahead. The way he moved at the helm had an almost sensual quality to it, the same way it did when he swayed to the music of the organ. He was one with his ship, this Man of the Waters, and could feel its every move through the wheel, could feel its very soul. I watched him with complete devotion, wanting nothing more out of life than to be in his presence, and I felt at peace. Far too soon, he handed over the wheel to Javier, and turned to us.

“The Mediterranean,” Captain Nemo said, not without some satisfaction in his voice. Our admiring gazes would have done nothing to discourage this sense of pride, for I was sure the professor had shared my thoughts as we watched him. 

As I came into the lounge the following day, I found professor Aronnax there, looking rather glum. 

“Bonjour, mon ami. Comment allez-vous?” I asked compassionately, wondering what might have cause this melancholy. He looked up at me, and he bore an unusual frown on his face. He got up, and gestured for me to follow him to his cabin. As he closed the door behind us, I was quite befuddled. 

“Professor, what-” He shushed me with a fervent gesture, listening intently at the door between his room and the Captain’s. Once he had apparently decided that the coast was clear, he went over to me and took my hands.

“Chérie, it seems the day of our reckoning is upon us. Ned Land is determined to make his escape while we are in these European seas,” he told me in a grave voice. I looked up at him with a somber expression. I would miss Ned terribly, he had gotten me through some tough days, when his efforts had been the only thing able to make me laugh. But of course I understood. He would never be happy onboard the Nautilus, and every day he felt his imprisonment more acutely. I took a deep breath.

“We will miss him terribly, mon ami. Conseil especially, I imagine,” I added, thinking how the two of them had become almost inseparable during our time onboard. 

“And I worry what the Captain will do to us, for you are a terrible liar, my friend, and he will surely figure out that we knew-”

“I said I would go with him,” he interrupted me. I froze. My vision grew blurry, and I felt the knot forming in my stomach. Pierre put a hand on my cheek. 

“I am so sorry, chérie. I do not want to go, not yet, but Ned is right. We may not have a chance like this again, and I do not believe the Capitaine will ever let us go willingly. We must make our escape.” I listened in cold dread as he spoke. He had truly made his mind up. He was going to leave me. I felt the tears start to roll down my cheeks.

“No, Pierre, please. You are happy here, you said so. Please don’t go,” I sobbed, and he pulled me close to his chest. I started crying violently, but managed to get out;

“Please don’t leave me.” He grabbed my face, turning it up to look at him.

“Come with us, chérie, je vous prie,” he said with a pained expression. I stared at him through the tears. How could I possibly leave, now that my existence aboard was finally all I could have wanted? Yet, could I stay, without the company of my dearest friend? My constant comfort, always so kind and understanding. I felt as though he had stabbed me through the heart, the actual possibility of him leaving had seemed in the distant future, if it was to ever come at all. But I could not leave the Nautilus. I would not leave Captain Nemo, and break my promises to him. I had to overcome, and find solace in the companionship of the crew. I shook my head in reply, and Pierre closed his eyes for a moment, seeming to fight back tears himself. He opened them, and looked at me intently.

“You are certain, ma chérie?” I nodded, and he leaned forward, placing a kiss on my forehead. I tried to collect myself, taking a shaky breath.

“When?” I managed to ask, but he understood my meaning.

“I do not know, Eleonora. I have left the whole matter in the hands of Ned Land. He will alert us when the time comes.”

Chapter Text

Although the professor had accepted my decision, as I had accepted his, I dreaded informing Ned Land of it. I was waiting for the opportune moment to undertake this task, which of course never comes, if you are willing to make enough excuses for postponing an unpleasant chore. Instead, I spent as much time as possible with Professor Aronnax, not wanting to miss out on a single second of these, our final days together. The need to seem indifferent in the presence of Captain Nemo was crucial, but it proved almost impossible to achieve, and only through the devotion to my friends did I manage it. It was impossible to tell if this temperate individual suspected anything of the planned escape, but I would imagine the thought must have occurred to him that an attempt might be made in these European seas. Even more than I worried over what wrath would fall upon me once he understood that I had been aware of their plan, I worried over what would befall my friends if their attempt proved unsuccessful. The thought that something might happen to them in the water after a successful escape attempt was too alarming to even begin to consider, and what pained me the most was that I would have no way of knowing. Perhaps ever. Pierre’s calm on the matter was almost unnatural, and I began to suspect that he did not think their ideal opportunity would arise at all on this occasion. I selfishly tried to hold onto that hope, while at the same time wanting to brace myself for the possibility that they would soon be gone. My resolve to stay onboard would strengthen somewhat when I had to venture down to the mess hall to eat, and I took comfort in the fact that these men would all still be here after my other friends had left. 

One strange occurrence that took my mind off the impending departure, to instead be occupied by my usual musings of the Nautilus’s mission, came about on the evening of February 14th. As me and the professor were sat close together in the lounge, talking of this and that in quiet camaraderie, Captain Nemo came in. He paid us no mind, but ordered the panels to be opened, and stared intently out the windows as if looking for something. Me and Aronnax quieted for a moment to watch him, but soon turned out attentions to the sea outside. Pierre was as always happy to tell me all about the fish we spotted, and I was as always more than happy to listen. I felt a pang of sorrow at the thought that this may be the last time we would ever be afforded this joy, not knowing what moment Ned Land would choose for their escape. My grim thoughts were interrupted by a shout from the professor.

“Un homme! Un naufragé! Il faut le sauver à tout prix!” he cried out, and I stared out the window to see that indeed, there was a man out there, but he did not seem in need of rescue. The Captain didn’t reply, but went up and leant against the window. The man actually swam up to us, and the Captain seemed to communicate with him through some gestures. The man vanished up to the surface. Only then did the Captain acknowledge our existence, telling us that there was no need for concern, for the man was a skilled diver by the name of Nicolas, who would swim between the Greek Isles regularly. 

“You know him, Capitaine?” asked Aronnax in astonishment.

“Why not, Professor Aronnax?” replied the Captain, in that tone of deliberate obtuseness that infuriated me so. 

“How did you come to know him, Captain?” I put in, but he only smiled at me serenely, before going over to a cabinet in the lounge. He opened it, revealing its contents to be gold bars, and in great numbers too. He started moving some of them into a chest adorned with the Nautilus’s monogram, the bold letter ‘N’, and its motto, Mobilis in Mobili. The professor had long ago explained to me that it would aptly be translated as ‘moving within the moving (element)’, and I didn’t have the heart to tell him that I was extremely familiar with the latin word mobil and its meaning. As the Captain finished his task, the chest full, he closed its lid and wrote an address in what must have been modern Greek. Pressing a button to alert the crew, the four men needed to carry the heavy chest soon appeared, and me and the professor looked on in stunned silence as it was carried away. 

“And you were saying?” Captain Nemo asked us with narrowed eyes. I glanced over at the professor, and we silently agreed to be obliging.

“We weren’t saying a thing, Captain,” I said innocently, and I could see his eyes glint humorously. 

“Then, with your permission, I’ll bid you goodnight,” he said, before retiring to his stateroom. Unable to sleep after this mysterious event, me and Aronnax soon heard the sounds above of the skiff being detached from our hull, and presumably set out to sea. We had to discuss in fervent whispers what this whole business could mean, being worried the Captain would hear us from next door. So, the Nautilus’s crew were still in contact with the outside world after all, and perhaps even went ashore? These contradictions were enough to drive one mad, and I was desperate to find out the secrets at once, the waiting proving almost unbearable. After about two hours we heard the skiff return, and I wondered how on Earth I was supposed to refrain from questioning people of these events tomorrow in the mess hall. Despite Captain Nemo’s promise, the rule that they weren’t allowed to share any details whatsoever on the mission still stood, and as I didn’t want anyone to get into trouble, I couldn’t trick them into telling me either. Unfortunately, patience has never been one of my greater virtues.

Chapter Text

“Mademoiselle, êtes-vous chaud?” asked the professor suddenly, as we were again sitting together in the lounge. He took off his coat and started fanning himself. I had been too preoccupied with all my thoughts of wonder, sorrow, and joy to have even noticed that, indeed, the temperature in the salon was close to unbearable. We could not understand what might be the cause of this, and worried that a fire had broken out onboard. Just as we were about to go investigate the cause of the heat, Captain Nemo entered the room. He went to check the thermometer, declaring that it showed 108 degrees Fahrenheit, and after the usual coaxing by the professor, told us the reason behind it. I’ll never know where Pierre got the patience to put up with the Captain’s infuriating way of only answering direct questions, for it personally made my blood boil. My irritation abated somewhat as I watched the thin byssus shirts start to cling to both of their bodies in the intense heat. Only when the panels opened was I able to rip my gaze from the delightful view, and saw outside that we were truly cruising through a current of boiling water. I’m not sure the professor had yet discovered the state this fact had reduced their clothes to, or I don’t think he would have been able to focus so intently on watching the sight outside the window as the Captain talked of… volcanoes? I think it was. Or something entirely different, for I certainly could not focus as his shirt was becoming close to transparent. 

“What about the channel we’re in right now?” asked Pierre, and turned around. If he had not already been flushed from the heat, I think the change on his face would have been more noticeable, but I saw it all the same as he caught sight of what I was already admiring. 

“Here it is,” replied the sight in question, and showed Aronnax the charts of the area we were travelling through. 

“You’ll note that I’ve entered the new islets in their place,” said the Captain, unphased as always. 

“But will this channel fill up one day?” asked the professor, and I almost snorted. I couldn’t tell if this innuendo had been intentional, since I never knew if Pierre was as innocent as he appeared, but regardless I found it hilarious. As they glanced over to me, I tried to cover up my laugh as a cough, and the Captain continued on answering the question, taking no notice of my silliness. Although Pierre didn’t quite have Captain Nemo’s statuesque build, he too was handsome, and I admit the view I had of the two of them was doing nothing to help my already hot state. Perhaps I really was a maenad. I saw the poor professor doing his best to only look at the Captain’s face, and he was faring a lot better than I was. However, when Nemo absent-mindedly started to undo his neckerchief, making his shirt fall open at the collar, it proved too much even for Pierre. He went back to the window, looking out it with a determined expression, and I saw him swallowing hard. I felt bad for him, since his feelings might be exposed by more than a flushed face, but I had no such reason to stop admiring the Captain. I was sitting on the back of a sofa, leaning on my arm behind me, and since Pierre had fallen silent, felt I had to continue the conversation. 

“Not a good place for a swim, then, Captain?” was the cleverest thing I could muster. He had a strange expression on his face, somewhere between tense and amused, and I noticed he too seemed to be focusing intently on looking at my face. Perhaps it was redder than I imagined, but it could all be blamed on the temperature, so I ignored any embarrassment from this fact.

“Indeed not, miss. The waters of the Coral sea are much better suited for that purpose,” he said, his eyes glinting. Suddenly I was thankful that I was already so flushed, or I would have surely turned positively scarlet from the mention of that night. We had never spoken of it, and I still had no idea if he had been aware of my presence when he came up on the platform. I also had no idea how much he’d seen as my body was lit up by the bioluminescence in the black night. I’m not sure what possessed me to reply in the following manner;

“I’m familiar with other parts of the Mediterranean that make for excellent swimming.” Nemo’s dark eyes flashed, his expression no longer amused, but for some reason I didn’t think it meant he was annoyed in the slightest. The professor turned around to me, and his eyes went wide, before quickly looking away. His gaze turned instead to the Captain, but of course, found him in the same state as before, and he seemed quite upset with the situation at this point. 

“We can’t stay any longer in this boiling water!” he exclaimed. 

“No, it wouldn’t be sensible,” replied the Captain calmly, while still not taking his eyes off of me. The professor, in turn, refused to look my way. I frowned slightly, not understanding why, before realising I was a massive idiot. I glanced down, and saw that, naturally, since we were all wearing the same type of shirt, mine was as transparent as theirs. I closed my eyes for a second, cursing myself, and crossed my arms over my chest. Opening my eyes, I saw the Captain trying to hold back a smile, before issuing an order to change the Nautilus’s course. The professor had settled for staring straight down into the floor at this point. I cleared my throat, trying to maintain some dignity, the heat from within bothering me far worse than the one from without. 

“Do you mind if I borrow this?” I asked Pierre, grabbing his jacket, and the Captain actually laughed, the scoundrel. The professor just made a vague gesture of approval without meeting my eyes.

“We’ll surface in a minute, should you like to take some air,” said the Captain before long, with barely contained laughter in his voice. 

“An excellent idea, I think,” I huffed, and left straight away for the main companionway. I could hear the Captain and Aronnax following behind me, the former continuing their conversation with ease, the latter with difficulty. As we waited for the crewmen to open the hatches, I tried to not look at their well built forms either, revealed by the normally loose shirts clinging to them. I pulled Pierre’s jacket close around me, despite boiling in the warm fabric, and I couldn’t help but notice some amused looks from the crew. I held my head high, trying not to rush up the companionway and throw myself into the sea to cool down, but to walk with what little dignity I had left. The sea breeze was mercifully crisp, and I breathed in deeply. 

“Not feeling like a swim then, miss Larsson?” asked the Captain in an sarcastic tone behind me. I didn’t turn around, partly because I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction, and partly because I knew I would not be able to stop myself from staring. 

“Not at the moment, sir, no. But please, don’t let me stop you!” I answered in the same sarcastic tone, gesturing to the blue waters. The platform was quickly filling with more people, all wanting respite from the scorching temperatures below, and I heard the sound of boots being thrown off. 

“Very well,” said the Captain, and before I knew it, he dove into the clear waves with the same elegance he did everything else. He was quickly followed by a dozen other men, and I was drenched from the splashing of their less elegant plunges. I had to laugh at this spectacle, so unexpected, yet so completely human. The azure water truly looked very inviting in the evening sun, and I felt my resolve waiver. I looked over to see the professor standing dumbstruck, watching as the men cooled down, some rowdily splashing their comrades. 

“You can’t swim, ma’am?” shouted William teasingly, while attempting to drown one of his friends, as he was cheered on by the others. 

“Of course I can, I just don’t want you drowning me!” I shouted back, laughing, as the poor man managed to get a breath in, before being pushed under again.

“Oh, we wouldn’t dream of drowning a lady!” he said indignantly, and the others loudly agreed. 

“Huh, well in that case…” No longer able to resist, I shrugged, chucked off my boots as well and handed Pierre back his jacket before diving in. I don’t think I did it anywhere near as elegantly as Captain Nemo, and as I came back up to the surface, I was met by stunned silence, before they all started laughing.

“I didn’t know women could swim…” said one of the men in astonishment. 

“Everyone knows witches float!” I told him jokingly, before looking around for the Captain. He smiled at me, shaking his head, and the curls in his black hair were more prominent in their wet state. Some hung past his forehead, down to his dark eyes, that were now gleaming with joy. I felt my heart swelling at the sight, and it skipped a beat as he swam up closer to me. 

“Not a witch, a sea nymph. Or do you resent that allegation as well?” he asked with raised eyebrows. I was thankful that his words didn’t leave me completely speechless, and I managed to collect myself after only a moment. 

“Not at all, sir, although I’m not sure I deserve the compliment. Are you sure you don’t feel maenad is the better description?” I asked sarcastically. He gave me a fond smile.

“Time will tell.” I tried to read his expression, but he left me, and was soon climbing back aboard the Nautilus. I saw Pierre doing his utmost to look anywhere but at the Captain, who pulled a hand through his wet hair, pushing it back. The water dripped down his already drenched clothes, that now all clung tightly to his powerful body. His face glistened in the sunset, little droplets sparkling in his dark lashes, and his lips were still wet from the swim. I was nowhere near as strong as the professor, and stared in wide-eyed wonder, thankful for the cool water around me. Who knew when I would be afforded another chance to look at him in this state? But the moment was over too soon, as was always the case when it came to admiring the handsome Odysseus. 

“Professor, will you not join us?” I called, regaining my composure as the Captain disappeared down the hatch. He laughed a little, and began to make excuses.

“Sure he will,” said Ned Land, who just appeared along with Conseil. He pushed the poor professor into the water, and Conseil began to shout at him, but was pushed in as well by the Canadian. The crew laughed and cheered, having continued their boisterous games, and Ned gave a bow to his fellow sailors, before diving in as well, very nearly as gracefully as the Captain. Conseil, I think, was about to try and drown his former friend in all seriousness, when he was interrupted by the professor laughingly stopping him. I breathed out, thankful for the professor’s good nature, and swam over to them. 

“Are you in no need of rescuing this time, then, ma’am?” asked Ned with a smirk. 

“No, since she’s not wearing that necklace now, is she?” came William’s voice, and his friends laughed, but I felt whatever flush was left on my face drain. I had hoped Ned wouldn’t have to find out about my fourth birthday present before their departure.

“What necklace?” he asked, and me and Pierre exchanged a glance. Just as Ned was about to demand an answer, we were saved by Kumar’s voice from the platform, shouting at the crew, supposedly to get them back to their duties. I took the opportunity to get back onboard as well, stalling my talk with Ned a little longer. I went to strategically cover my chest with my arms, when Kumar draped a towel over my shoulders. I looked at him gratefully, and he smiled. 

“I heard the sea nymph had decided to go for a swim as well,” he told me, and I just shook my head in astonishment.

“Do you two have some sort of telepathic communication, sir?” I asked him, and he chuckled. 

“Very nearly, priya, very nearly.”

Chapter Text

I had managed to escape to my cabin to dry off and change clothes, but I knew I could not postpone the dreaded meeting with Ned Land for all eternity. I knew how angry, not to mention disappointed, he would be with me, but it could not be helped. I could not leave it any longer, for what if their opportunity came, and they missed it because of me? Ned was an honourable man, and a caring friend, and he would not leave without me before I had explained to him my reasoning. I had almost gathered the courage to go find him, when there was a knock at my door. 

“Come in,” I said, my voice wavering slightly. As if fated, the man in question appeared. He looked serious, and I asked him to take a seat at the desk. 

“So,” he said.

“So,” I said, sighing deeply. He somehow knew something was up, perhaps he had even guessed what. 

“What can I do for you, mr. Land?” I asked, wanting to stall just a little longer. He looked at me, and said nothing for a long while. 

“That the necklace in question, there?” he said, and I felt a chill go through me. I had completely forgotten that it was still laying on the nightstand, and now cursed myself. I just nodded, and he went over to take a closer look. Lifting it up, he gave an impressed whistle, but I knew what he must be feeling. 

“Well, it’s certainly a lot more impressive than some old twine bracelet,” he said bitterly.

“Ned…” I put a hand on his shoulder, but he would not turn around to face me. 

“No wonder you’re staying with him,” he said, his voice ice cold. Professor Aronnax must have told him then, trying to spare me the task, and unlike me, had not left it until the last possible moment. I hated hurting Ned, but could at least let him know Captain Nemo was not my reason for staying. Well, not the only one. 

“Ned, it’s not like that…” I began, and he finally turned around, his face enraged.

“No? It’s like he said, you have better options, clearly!” he sneered, and I backed up. Tears were burning just behind my eyes, but I would not let them fall. 

“That’s not what he meant,” I said, but my voice was weak. Ned just shook his head with a cruel smile.

“Didn’t think you of all people would sell out like that,” he said, and his words felt like a punch to my gut. 

“What’s it to you?! What do you care whether I come or stay, if you think me so shallow?!” I flared up, angered by his unfair assumption. His face dropped as though I’d slapped him. His shoulders slumping, he sank down onto the bed. 

“You’re not shallow, your highness, you’re the exact opposite,” he said, and his voice had turned sad. I felt my anger dissipate, and stood dumbstuck. 

“I just don’t understand how you can choose that Nemo over…” he started, before interrupting himself.

“Well, over your freedom! He’s got us imprisoned here, without a trial, without even a crime committed! Why wouldn’t you want to escape?” he lamented. I sighed again, and sat down next to him. 

“Ned, I understand why you want to escape, everything you say is true, but it’s different for me. I have nothing to go back to, no life I wish to return to, and I’ve found myself feeling quite at home here aboard the Nautilus. I am to join the crew, the Captain has given me his promise,” I said, trying to make him understand. He sneered again. 

“His promise? What good’s the promise of a stranger? You don’t know his name, or what he’s done!” 

“I will! He’s going to tell me everything, every detail-” Ned interrupted me with a vicious laugh.

“Oh really? And what did you have to give him in return? Tell me, is he gonna share you with the crew, or keep you all to himself?” I felt myself pale, and arose. The tears were yet again burning in my eyes, but now in white hot anger. 

“Get out,” I whispered. He arose as well, throwing the necklace on the floor. Looming over me at first, he then cowered suddenly when he saw my expression. 

“Ella, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean-”

“Get out!” I shouted in his face, and before giving him a chance to do so, grabbed his collar, and dragged him towards the door. I flung it open, and pushed him out with all my strength. He stumbled, and fell against the corridor wall opposite, staring up at me. 

“Please, I’m sorry, let me…” He silenced as I leaned in close to his face, my eyes shooting daggers. 

“Don’t ever presume to talk of the Captain or me like that, ever again, or I will see to it that you come to regret being born,” I hissed between clenched teeth, and he had the good sense to look frightened. I straightened slowly, staring him down, but had to look away when I heard hurried footsteps approaching. Oskar and another man came round the corner, but stopped abruptly when they saw see scene in front of them. They looked between me and Ned Land, before turning and hurrying back the way they came from. I shot Ned another death glare, before slamming the cabin door shut behind me. ‘Well that went well’, I thought sarcastically, finally breaking down into tears. 

My crying was interrupted almost immediately by a great commotion in the corridor outside, and I tried to quiet down to hear what was going on. I heard Ned shouting, but no other voices, and his soon disappeared down the gangway as well. I frowned in confusion, but needed to collect myself before I could go to find out what had happened, so I crawled into bed, hugging my knees. I cried because I was angry at Ned’s words, and I cried even more because of this being the way we would part ways. I sobbed something fiercely, already missing him, Conseil, and most of all Pierre. I was angry enough at Ned to wish they would not get their opportunity to escape, but then contradicting my anger by thinking that them staying meant we might fix this somehow. In the middle of these thoughts, I must have missed a knock at my door, for it opened suddenly. I was hoping to see the professor, wishing for him to comfort me, and sort all this out, but it wasn’t him. Captain Nemo stood in the door, his presence that of a vengeful angel, his expression wild with rage, and it terrified me in my already fragile state. I could not imagine what I had done for him to appear to me like this, and I squeezed my eyes shut, not daring to face him. I heard him walk up to me, and my breathing grew quick and shallow, when suddenly I felt him gently cradle my face in his hands. I managed to take a deep breath, and opened my eyes in confusion. Captain Nemo was kneeling by the bed, looking at me intently, all rage gone from his face, replaced by worry.

“Did he hurt you?” I only stared at him, dazed by all the emotions surging within me, and he had to repeat his question. 

“Did he hurt you?!” he asked fervently, his hands tightening on my face for a second, and my mind cleared somewhat. 

“No, no…” I whispered, trying to understand what had happened, but my mind was slow, and did not provide me with any answers. He arose suddenly, crossing his arms, and started pacing the room. 

“I should have returned that man to the sea the moment he attacked Gabriel. I should have foreseen this happening! I gave you my word that no harm would ever befall you aboard the Nautilus, and now this… Eleonora, can you ever forgive me?” He was back at my side, staring at me, his eyes glassy. I could only stare back. 

“I will make it right. I will make him pay for this. He has been placed in confinement, and is awaiting his punishment. Please, Eleonora, if I make this right, can you trust me again?” My head was spinning as I tried to make sense of this tirade. Clearly there had been some grievous misunderstanding, and I frowned as I attempted to wrap my mind around what he was saying. Sniveling, I tried to ask him to clarify what he meant, but I was interrupted.

“Captain, I’m afraid I’m at a loss-” 

“Tell me what happened, so that I may show that harpooner exactly what justice means aboard the Nautilus!” he exclaimed in fervor. I took a deep breath, and reached for his hand. He clasped mine with both of his. 

“Captain, I don’t understand what you’re saying,” I said, and sounded quite exasperated, rather than upset. He was at a loss for words for a moment. 

“Ned Land. He will pay the price for trying force himself on you,” he said with barely contained anger. My eyes went wide, my mind suddenly clear, and I propped myself up on one elbow. 

“For doing what?!” I exclaimed. “No, no, please, you’ve got it all wrong!” 

Now it was his turn to go wide-eyed, and he arose again to restart his pacing.

“Eleonora, I understand that your empathetic nature would have you protect that man, but it would be beneath you to-”

“Oh, don’t you dare think I would have any sympathy whatsoever for a rapist, Captain,” I spat out, suddenly enraged, but not at him. He stopped, and looked into my eyes, while a myriad of expressions passed over his face. Panic, rage, and anguish, before settling on painful understanding. And with that, he had found out another one of my secrets. He sank down on the bed. I could not hold the eye contact while he looked at me with such great sympathy, so I looked down, and saw the necklace, still laying on the floor. Captain Nemo followed my gaze, and reached down to pick it up. Studying it, he asked me in a quiet voice;

“If the situation was misread, will you explain what happened? Why were you so furious with the harpooner?” I watched the necklace in his hands, still not wanting to meet his gaze, and answered in an equally quiet voice;

“He spoke ill of you.” From the corner of my eye, I saw him turn his head to look at me, but he said nothing at first. Then, putting a hand on my cheek again, he turned my face up to look at him.

“You threw a man twice your size out the door for speaking ill of me?” he asked, barely holding back a smile, and his eyes were filled with so much warmth I had to withdraw to not have my heart break in two. I sat up properly, hugging my knees again, and went back to watching the necklace. 

“Not just of you, of me too. He was… insinuating things,” I said, my voice hard. The Captain took a deep breath.

“Ah. I understand. And did he come in here without your permission, to make these accusations?” he asked, his voice level, but I could hear the fire just under its surface.

“Not without permission, sir. He came to ask… about the necklace. William joked earlier, when we were swimming, you know, that I wasn’t wearing it, and…” My voice trailed off, but he had understood my meaning.

“You hadn’t told him of it?” 

“No, sir, nor of me joining the crew. He didn’t take it too well,” I said, huffing at this enormous understatement. I met his eyes again, and he still had that fond expression on his face. 

“But you have not been hurt?” he asked imploringly. 

“Only my pride, Captain,” I said, with a bitter smile. 

“As grave as that offence is, miss, I must ask your forgiveness for my reaction. When the men heard the commotion, Oskar and Henryk went to investigate, and with what they saw… Well, having heard the harpooner’s comments, and the way he acts… We assumed the worst,” he stated, not seeming all too ashamed about it. I wiped at my face, still wet from my tears, but smiled at him, and said as much.

“You don’t seem very sorry, Captain.” 

“I’m not sorry for my assumption, miss, only for scaring you,” he said earnestly.

“I’m quite flattered you would go to such lengths to defend my honour, sir, so you are forgiven,” I said, in a faintly joking way, but it was all too true. His words, now that I had had some time to take them in, warmed me beyond reason. 

“You are one of us now, Eleonora. We would go to any lengths to defend you,” he replied in all seriousness, and my smile faded. His words meant more to me than I could ever possibly tell him. Not knowing any other way to thank him, I reached for his hand again, and kissed it ardently. He was staring at me as I again looked up, and I blushed slightly, not knowing where my sudden courage had come from. After a moment, he cleared his throat, and looked away. 

“Mr. Land’s actions, though not as serious as initially thought, will of course need to be punished. He will stay in the brig for forty-eight hours, to think them over,” he said in his normal, stoic voice, but then turned back to me with a smirk.

“Unless you would rather I have him keelhauled?” I laughed a little at his joke. 

“I think perhaps it would be a bit too severe in this case, sir.”

“A shame. I was quite looking forward too it,” he smiled sadistically, and I laughed properly. 

“Very well then, Captain, but only around the smaller circumference of the bow!” I said, and he laughed in return, but then grew serious again. 

“You are certain you are quite alright?” he asked, his tone so honestly worried that I felt my heart swell. Perhaps he did love me after all, if not in the way I wished, but as he loved all his crew. It was better than anything I could have ever hoped for, and I tried to give him a warm smile, with no hint of the bitterness I couldn’t help but feel. 

“I’m alright, Odysseus,” I said, and the way his face lit up as he relaxed brightened my very soul. He lifted his hands to put the necklace on me again, as he had at the party. 

“A great relief, Eleonora. If the case had been anything but, I don’t know…” he began, but then shook his head, rising.

“I will go tell the men to call off the keelhauling then, miss,” he said cheerfully, and I was almost positive he was joking. I stopped him with a request.

“Captain, would you ask someone if Professor Aronnax might to come see me, please?” I said, still desperate for the comfort of my friend, to whom I could actually tell the full story. A shadow passed over his face, but was gone almost before I could register it.

“Certainly, miss Larsson,” he said, and closed the door behind him.

Chapter Text

As I retold the professor of the whole incident, cradled in his arms, he was as furious with Ned Land as I had ever seen him. 

“Bien. He can rot in that brig for the rest of our journey then, that imbecile,” he spat, before drying my tears, that had started to fall again as I told the story.

“I’m certain he did not mean it, chérie, he is simply jealous,” he said compassionately. 

“But there is nothing to be jealous of! If he wasn’t so stubborn, he could join the crew as well! You all could, I’m sure,” I sobbed, and the professor shook his head with a chuckle. 

“That is not what I meant, ma chérie, I meant… Alors, peu importe,” he sighed, and I was too upset to pay his words any closer attention.

“I do believe this means we may not be afforded a chance of escape though, for I don’t believe the Capitaine will stay in these waters very long,” he continued, and I sobbed even harder.

“I’m sorry, Pierre, I’m so sorry!” 

“Non, non, ce n’est pas… that is not what I meant! I am glad of it, mademoiselle,” he smiled at me. I looked up at him through my tears.

“Really?” 

“Mais oui, I do not want to leave, you or the Nautilus! There is too much left to see still. Ned Land will have to live with the consequences of his actions,” he shrugged, and I hugged him tightly, desperately hoping he was right. With a light knock at the door, Oskar appeared, holding a tray with dinner for both me and the professor. He put it down on the desk, but as he went to leave, I stopped him.

“Tack, Oskar, det var snällt av er,” (“Thank you, Oskar, that’s very kind of you.”) I said in a strained voice, not knowing who had been so thoughtful as to arrange this, for I had no energy whatsoever to go to the mess hall tonight. He didn’t turn around, but spoke over his shoulder;

“Jag är glad att ni är oskadd, frun.” (“I’m glad you’re unharmed, Madam.”) I was stunned at the emotion in his voice, but he was out the door before I could say anything else. I didn’t have much of an appetite, but Pierre made me eat some dinner all the same. It must have been quite late at this point, and I felt it as being one of those endless days, where you can’t fathom how it contains the same twenty-four hours as any other. The events of the afternoon seemed months gone by now. Despite the professor’s conviction, the possibility of my friends’ escape still made me anxious, and as my nerves felt like live wires after today, it was more than I could handle. I needed to know he wasn’t going anywhere, not yet. In a quiet voice, I asked him;

“Pierre, will you stay? Tonight, I mean?” He looked at me in astonishment, but something in my expression must have made him understand what I meant, and he relaxed. Putting aside any objections he might have had, he smiled warmly.

“Bien-sûr, ma chérie.” And so we went to bed, fully clothed apart from our boots and jackets, since I didn’t want to scandalise him further. Frankly, I was too tired to care either way, and this seemed easier. The bed was narrow for two people, but not uncomfortably so, since the whole point was that I wanted him close. I laid in his arms, hearing his steady heartbeat, and soon fell soundly asleep to it. 

We awoke to a gentle knock at the door, I do not know what the time was, but we were both drunk with sleep, and it took us a moment to collect ourselves.

“Who is it?” I called, my voice gruff. The visitor hesitated for a second, before answering in a timid voice;

“Excusez-moi, mademoiselle, je cherchais Monsieur. Lui et Monsieur Land ont disparu.” Pierre and me realised at the same time what poor Conseil must have thought, when his companion did not return last night, and he couldn’t find his master either this morning.

“Merde! Conseil, pardonne-moi, je suis là, mon garçon,” the professor called, furious with himself for this oversight. Conseil was silent for a moment, before starting to excuse himself, but I got up and opened the door, letting him in. For once in his life, this temperate man seemed uneasy, but I couldn’t be sure if it was because he up until a moment ago thought he had been left behind by his friends, or because this was the first time he’d found his master in bed with a woman. I tried to suppress a smile at the latter thought, and put a hand on his shoulder, gesturing for him to sit down on my chair. He did so, but seemed quite uncomfortable still with the whole situation. Pierre sat up on the edge of the bed, his dark blonde locks on end, and my heart swelled at the sight. I leant on the basin cupboard as he explained to the poor Conseil what had happened, and why mr. Land hadn’t come back to their cabin after his ‘talk’ with me. Conseil’s eyed widened as Pierre repeated the Canadian’s words, and he turned to me, shaking his head in disbelief. 

“Je suis vraiment désolé, mademoiselle,” he told me in earnest, and I put my hand on his shoulder again, squeezing it. 

“I’m sorry too, Conseil, since the situation may mean you will not get your opportunity to escape,” I said solemnly. Pierre translated for me, but Conseil actually smiled a little, and said something with a slight shrug of his shoulders. 

“He says he is not sorry for that, mademoiselle,” smiled Pierre. I smiled at the both of them, relieved that the only person hurt by Ned’s actions would be Ned himself. 

With my sincere assurances that I would be fine, Pierre and Conseil left my cabin, and I got ready to go down to the mess hall. I doubted it would be busy, as I thought we had woken up quite late, and was thankful for it. I was correct, there was only a handful crewmen in there as I entered, however, among them was Kumar and Jakub. They were speaking together in the small group, but silenced as I came in, and Kumar arose. 

“Madam! Come, come, sit down,” he said, pulling out a chair for me. I felt slightly awkward, having perhaps preferred to eat my breakfast alone, but did as he said.

“Tea, Madam?” he asked, and I didn’t have time to answer before he went to get it for me. The others were glancing at me, not continuing their conversation, and I felt supremely uneasy. Maybe coming down had been a bad idea. I noticed Jakub watching me with a strange expression, a badly concealed smile on his lips, and I frowned. Had the Captain not told them what had actually happened, or why were they acting so strange? Thankfully Kumar was soon back with the tea. I thanked him, and sipped it in silence, before Jakub finally spoke up. The others laughed a little at his comment, but I didn’t understand his words in Nautilese, and looked to Kumar for a translation. I noticed he had the same strange expression on his face, and he said with a chuckle;

“Jakub says we need to behave ourselves in the future.” I raised my eyebrows in question.

“After how you handled the harpooner, I don’t think anyone will want to risk a disagreement with you, Madam,” he said, patting my back. I looked down at my tea again, blushing a little. 

“Oh. I’m afraid I’ve always had a bit of a temper, I guess,” I said, my tone was apologetic, but Kumar gave a hearty laugh. 

“As I have witnessed before!” I blushed even more at the mention of my disastrous fight with the Captain. 

“Don’t remind me,” I said, shaking my head, but couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Nothing to be ashamed of, priya, it is good to know you can take care of yourself. Not that you will need to,” Kumar said warmly, and I met his eyes again with a fond smile. Their acceptance and genuine care for me was reflected in the faces of everyone around me, and I feared the feelings of love for them would overwhelm me. I wasn’t up for any more crying at the moment, so opted for a joke instead.

“I bloody well did, since Oskar and Henryk ran away as soon as they saw us! What if the situation had been what you thought at first?!” I berated him in in jest, but the thought struck me that I did have a point.

“Oh, believe me, Madam, we asked them the same thing. Their defence was that you ‘seemed to have the situation under control’, so there was time for them to go get the real muscle,” he said, nudging Jakub, who grinned proudly. 

“In addition to their defence, Oskar particularly was very worried for you, Madam. He insisted to take you your dinner as before, to ensure you were taken care of,” Kumar said, and his words left me stunned. Oskar had been worried for me? His short statement the night before suddenly proved more than simple politeness. He actually cared about me. I almost got a bit choked up. I hoped I would have a chance to speak to him properly one of these days. Kumar must have read my thoughts, for he quickly came to my rescue.

“Also, can you imagine those scrawny shrimp taking on that big half-wit?! No, I think not.” I had to laugh at the colourful description of poor Oskar and Henryk, and but right now I did not mind Ned being called a half-wit. The tension was broken, the previous conversation continued, and I went to get some food before sitting down again. One of the men addressed me, and Kumar translated again.

“He says your hair looks nice. Wavey,” he said, gesturing to it.

“Oh! Thank you!” I said cheerfully, shaking my hair around. I don’t think the concept of ‘beach waves’ was invented yet, so explained it to them.

“It’s the salt. Perhaps we should go swimming more often,” I smiled, winking to Kumar. He rolled his eyes, but chuckled all the same.

Chapter Text

After finishing the late breakfast, I went to go find Pierre again. The poor man would want to escape soon if only to be rid of me, I feared. Even though we had been given a few days respite with Ned Land in custody, there was still a looming threat of them leaving once he was released, if we were still in the Mediterranean by then. I found the professor in the lounge with Conseil, attempting to classify the fish passing by outside. It seemed no easy task since we were travelling at a speed of about twenty-five miles per hour, which was still only half the Nautilus’s top speed. Pierre had doubtless been correct in his assumption that the Captain wished to leave this crowded sea sooner rather than later. I wondered what had happened back in civilisation since the news from the Abraham Lincoln had reached it that the ‘narwhal’ was in fact a man-made submarine. I imagined the efforts to hunt us down had increased a hundredfold. But then again, some people out there had already known the truth, as proven by the collision with that ship back in January. And now, the meeting with the diver Nicolas, and the delivery of the gold to who-knows-where… No, Captain Nemo had not been entirely truthful when he said he had severed all contacts with society, and I was burning with anticipation of finding out the full story. What intrigued me the most was naturally if any of it would be something I was familiar with, as a historical event. Was there even a chance I would be able to provide the Captain with some knowledge that might help him in his quest, whatever it was? But I was getting ahead of myself. It might be long still before he decided it was time to let me in on the secret. I went to join my friends, but contended myself to sitting on my perch so as to not disturb them. Just watching them in their enthusiastic studies was a joy, and Pierre would sometimes point out a certain fish or other marine animal to me. 

We spent that and the next day in this manner, as I tried to soak up the feeling of our companionship with the bitterness and fear of someone who knows a pleasant experience might soon be coming to an end. I left my friends as usual to have dinner in the mess hall that day, the 17th of February, which was always a welcome reminder that life would go on even after they left me. On this day, however, an unusual event occurred, as Captain Nemo stepped into the room. I knew of course this did happen from time to time, he had told me so himself, when he had something to discuss with the crew. I assumed that meant I should perhaps leave, but he stopped me.

“The forty-eight hours are up. Will you come with us to the brig?” asked the Captain. I couldn’t see why I should be present really, but conceded all the same. He motioned to a few other crewmen, and we headed off. 

As we stood outside the brig, the room into which the four of us had been thrown as we were first taken aboard the Nautilus, I remembered it with a shudder. All my anger towards Ned had dissipated in the two days passed since our fight, and now I felt bad thinking about him in that austere room, with only a table and chairs. With me was Captain Nemo, Kumar, Jakub, and a couple more crewmen. Two of them had rifles, and I studied them sceptically, before addressing the Captain.

“Will that really be necessary?” I asked. He looked at me serenely, but then smirked slightly.

“One can always hope,” he said, and I shook my head reproachfully. 

“Someone ought to tell him the conditions of his release,” Kumar stated with disdain. I didn’t want to escalate the situation further, and thought perhaps Ned would listen if I was the one to talk to him, rather than one of the men he considered his captors.

“Let me do it,” I said, my voice even, as I looked intently at the Captain. He raised his eyebrows, and I was sure he would refuse, but then he conceded with a small smile, and gave the order to unlock the door. The rifles were pointed to it as if expecting an attack, but as it opened I saw Ned sat on the floor, leaning against the wall. He looked up with an expression of contempt, but it was replaced by uncertainty as he saw me. He straighted a little, and cleared his throat. I nodded to Jakub, who closed the door behind me. With a sigh, I sank down the wall opposite him. He would not meet my eyes, but soon spoke up.

“So… what’s to happen to this old harpooner?” I couldn’t help but huff at this, and he glanced up at me through locks of blonde hair hanging past his forehead. 

“You are being released,” I stated. His eyes widened almost comically.

“On parole, let’s call it,” I added. He looked at me with a wary expression. 

“Which entails..?” 

“An attitude improvement,” I said calmly. He sneered. 

“The Captain expects me to bow and scrape before him? Forget it, I’d rather stay in here.”

"Certainly not. I, however, expect an apology, and a promise that any such comments will not be repeated. You do remember what I said?” I asked with a meaning glance. It gave me great satisfaction to see him actually gulp at the mention of my threat.

“Ma’am, I’ll be happy to spend the rest of my sorry days onboard apologising to you, and believe me when I say my mistake will not be repeated. I never meant to hurt you,” he said earnestly. It was not the first time the look of his blue eyes had placated me, and I smiled at him, warmly this time. 

“I believe you have been more than sufficiently punished, Ned.” He gave a small, bitter smile.

“This was your idea, huh?”

“Not at all, but the other option the Captain gave me was to have you keelhauled, which I thought sounded a bit harsh,” I said, only half joking. 

“He was angry too, then? Well, can’t say I’m as sorry to have hurt his feelings,” he sneered again.

“I didn’t tell him what you said,” I told him simply. He looked at me in astonishment, and it took him several seconds to process my words. 

“Thank you. That was good of you. I’m not sure there would have been another option than keelhauling if you had,” he said jokingly. I didn’t have the heart to tell him what the initial suspicion had been towards him. We quieted for a moment.

“You’re still wearing my bracelet,” he then said, in a much quieter voice. I looked down at my wrist. 

“I am,” I replied, meeting his eyes.

“Does that mean you’ve already forgiven me?” he asked teasingly.
“No, it simply means I know you’re unable to control your big, dumb mouth,” I answered, and he smiled at the reminder of his previous apology. 

“Although, I would suggest you do your best in the future, or I may not be able to stop the next keelhauling,” I warned, and he sobered a little. 

“Besides, I would hate for us to part as anything less than friends,” I added in a somber tone. His eyes widened again.

“We’re still in the Mediterranean, then?” he asked, and I could see the spark of hope reigniting within him. 

“We are, but not for long,” I said, my vision blurring a little at the reminder that if my friends were to leave at this time, it would happen very soon. He got up, energised suddenly, and held out his hand to me. I took it, and he effortlessly lifted me to my feet. 

“So I’m really free to go?” he asked incredulously. 

“You are, but please, Ned, do heed my warning,” I implored, truly worried how much further the Captain’s patience would stretch. Ned gave me a one-sided smile, and put a hand on my cheek.

“I’m flattered you care so much, your highness. Don’t worry, I’ll keep my big, dumb mouth shut,” he assured me. 

“You better,” I smiled sweetly, but my eyes told another story, and his face dropped along with his hand. I walked up to the door, and gave it a knock to be let out.

As we exited the room, I held my head high, and watched Ned, who quickly slid away down the corridor to his and Conseil’s cabin after giving the Captain and his men a glare. 

“God almighty, he looked positively terrified, miss. What on Earth did you say to him?” the Captain asked, looking more than a little amused. I shrugged.

“I simply reminded him of what I said the other day.” The Captain raised his eyebrows, a small smile playing on his lips at me emulating his habit of making people coax the answer from him.

“Which was?” 

“That if he ever spoke of either of us that way again, I would make sure he regrets being born,” I stated matter-of-factly, meeting his eyes. The men were silent for a moment before laughter broke out, a few of them cheering, and dunking my back. 

“Well said, little Rani,” Kumar laughed, wiping a tear from his eye. The Captain looked at me with an expression I had seen once before, after I sang at Thomas’s wake. That look of fierce pride, mixed with something else I couldn’t quite put my finger on. 

It was only as I was laying in bed later, thinking back on the day’s events, that something occurred to me. Kumar had spoken in English, not Nautilese. Had it been some sort of test, to ascertain where my loyalties truly lay? Oh god, had they been able to hear what we had spoken of? I lay there, twisting and turning, unable to shake the feeling that we might unwittingly have sabotaged my friends’ escape, before they even had a chance to attempt it.

Chapter Text

I simply could not relax, these concerns bothering me immensely. I didn’t know how to bring it up to my friends, the relationship between myself and Ned was still strained, but how could I let them attempt the escape if there was a risk their plans had been intercepted? If they were caught, their stay onboard would surely change for the worse, and I suspected Professor Aronnax and Conseil would become intimately familiar with the inside of the brig as well. As unpleasant as the other outcomes of the escape attempt would be for me, this was by far the worst one, for I could not continue living as one of the crew while they were locked up, prisoners in a much more direct sense than currently. This meant I had yet another selfish reason for trying to stop them, unflattering as it was, and I had to find an opportunity to tell them. Sometime after midnight, I gave up on trying to sleep, and went to the lounge, hoping the window panels would be open to offer some distraction. 

To my surprise, I found Pierre there, still awake. This was very unusual for him, and I wondered if he too was plagued by worry for their coming departure. Regardless, he was deep in thought, for he did not hear me enter, and I had to gently call him.

“Pierre?” He turned around, and his face lit up.

“Mademoiselle, êtes-vous réveillé? Venez ici, chérie,” he said, gesturing for me to come up to the window. I smiled, clearly he wasn’t sick of me just yet. The Nautilus’s beacon lit up the seafloor, and I saw it strewn with shipwrecks. Of all ages, and in all states of decay, from ones barely recognisable as a ship, to ones that looked ready to once again take on the high seas, they all rested together in this graveyard. It was a macabre sight, yet somehow serene, nothing like the sinking wreck we had seen in the Pacific. We watched together in amazement as the sight passed by below us, before I broke the silence.

“Professor, why are you awake?” I asked in a quiet voice. I prayed it was not for the reason I feared, not yet having had the chance to dissuade my friends from making their escape. 

“Oh, I could not go to bed and miss these sights. We will be at the Strait of Gibraltar before long, and I am hoping for a chance to see the ruins of the Temple of Hercules, mademoiselle,” he explained, and I breathed a sigh of relief. 

“I’m glad, mon ami, for there is something I have to tell you.” I relayed what had happened during Ned’s release, and what fears it had arisen in me. He listened intently to me, and took my suspicion seriously. After I finished, he declared that we must inform the Canadian in the morning of this fact, and persuade him to wait to execute their plan. I could finally relax, and sank down onto a sofa in front of the window. Pierre sat down next to me, and put an arm around me. 

“It seems we will not part ways just yet, ma chérie,” he said with a gentle smile. With this assurance, I suddenly felt how tired I really was, and I laid down with my head on his lap. He stroked my arm, and before I knew it, I fell into a heavy sleep. 

“Mademoiselle. Mademoiselle!” I was awoken by his voice gently imploring me. I arose on my elbow, still half asleep. 

“Quoi..?” I said, and he laughed a little at me speaking French in my half-conscious state. 

“I think I see it!” I was suddenly wide awake, and sat up, staring out the window. Indeed, he was right, and we watched the magnificent ruins come into view. Awestruck, we stared in silence, but the sight was gone in less than a minute.

“If only my mother could have seen this,” I whispered.

“Your mother, chérie? Not your father?” asked Pierre, perplexed. No, my mother. It was she that had been the professor of ancient history, not my father. He was a medieval historian, and had been employed in Uppsala, but I knew even less of his work, and had tweaked the truth just slightly. I somehow doubted they would have believed me if I’d told the truth on this account, were women even allowed to attend university at this time?

“Uh, yes, sorry, of course. My father…” I agreed, trying to push away the pang of intense sadness at the thought of my mother. Pierre studied me, but didn’t pursue the subject further. 

“Will you be able to sleep, chérie?” he asked, always so empathic without any demands. I nodded with a slight smile, secure in the knowledge that he would be with me for a time, still. 

My security would prove false soon enough. On that day, February 18th, the Nautilus surfaced on the waters of the Atlantic, and up on the platform, my friends and I breathed in its fresh winds. Our ship rolled in the big waves, and we soon had to go back down. Conseil headed back to their cabin, but Ned went along to the lounge with me and Pierre. I exchanged a look with the latter, thinking we may as well speak with the former right away, there was no reason for delay. He seemed to be of the same opinion, and we continued into his cabin. He yet again listened carefully at the door to the Captain’s stateroom, before gesturing for us to take a seat. Ned took the chair, and me and the professor sat down on his bed. Aronnax, the diplomat, spoke up first. 

“Ned, I will not berate you for your actions, seeing as you have served your sentence for them, although you can imagine my opinion on them. However, the consequence of them is that we have now left the Mediterranean, and so, our chance of escape has gone. I will not pretend to be as disappointed with this as you must be. Mademoiselle has also observed that your conversation last night may have been overheard by the Capitaine and his men, giving us another reason to postpone, as they may be expecting it.” Ned looked at us intently, but astonished us both when he uttered the following words;

“We’ll do it this evening.” We stared at him, and Pierre arose in a fervor. Ned continued;

“We agreed to wait for decent circumstances. Those circumstances have arrived. This evening we’ll be just a few miles off the coast of Spain. It’ll be cloudy tonight. The wind’s blowing towards shore. You gave me your promise, Professor Aronnax, and I’m counting on you. Ma’am, if you’ve changed your mind, you’re still welcome to join us.” Me and Pierre were both silent for a long moment, taking this in.

“But Ned, do you not understand… If you are caught-” I began, but he interrupted me.

“I don’t plan to spend anymore time in that room, ma’am, I can tell you that. If we’re caught, I’m going down swinging,” he said matter-of-factly. I paled. So there was an option worse than them being imprisoned. 

“I doesn’t matter much if they heard us, that cunning Nemo will have already suspected we would try to escape when we got to Europe,” he went on, and I had to admit this was of course true. 

“If anything, they won’t be expecting it now that we’ve left the Mediterranean,” he added, with a shrug of his shoulders. I was sat, frozen in place, not being able to accept that all my fears were coming back tenfold. 

“Ned, please…” I tried, but my voice was weak.

“We’ll do it this evening at nine o’clock,” he said, paying my plea no mind, and explained his plan in detail. Pierre was pacing back and forth, clearly also struggling to come to terms with their departure. 

“The ocean’s rough,” he put in, but it was a feeble argument against the Canadian’s determination.

“I know, but that’s a risk we have to take. Freedom’s worth paying for. In any case the longboat’s well built, and going a few miles with a carrying wind is no big deal. By tomorrow who knows if this ship won’t be a hundred leagues out to sea? If circumstances are in our favour, between ten and eleven this evening we’ll be landing on some piece of solid ground or we’ll be dead.” I let out a whimper, and I could feel my tears start to fall. Ned quieted at this, and looked at me.

“Please come with us, Ella. You can’t stay here with these people,” he said, in a much gentler tone. I started crying harder, and Pierre sat down again and held me close. I hid my face in my hands, this was all too much. They would leave me after all, and in only a few hours. What if it was years before Captain Nemo decided to tell me of their true existence, and what if the professor was right, that their mission was not admirable after all? But no, it had to be. It had to be. I shook my head, looking down at the floor.

“I can’t. I’m sorry,” I whispered. From the corner of my eye I saw Ned throw up his hands in the air, but then got down on one knee in front of me, looking exasperated. 

“And why not? You told me you don’t want to go back because you have nothing to return to, but you don’t honestly think we’d leave you to fend for yourself once we made it back? Hell, that’s what I came to tell you the other day, I’ll marry you myself if you’ll have me!” I looked up, and met his blue eyes. They were imploring, almost pleading, and I felt myself dizzying at his words. I had never known such selfless kindness before, and tried to imagine what this would mean. A harpooner’s wife in the 19th century seemed a lonely existence, he would be away most of the time, and how on Earth was I supposed to adjust to this completely unknown society? When the alternative was to stay aboard the Nautilus, and experience every wonder of the sea, together with my Odysseus and his men, how could I even consider it? I took too long to answer, and Ned looked away, accepting my silence as refusal. He arose with a sigh.

“Fine. Professor, our chances are in God’s hands, and I’ll see you this evening,” he said stoically, and left us.

Chapter Text

Pierre pulled me in tightly as I stared sobbing violently, I feared the pain would rip me apart. He stroked my hair, telling me softly it would be alright, but soon I could hear him crying too. We laid down on the bed in each other’s arms, weeping silently together until, after a long time, there were no tears left. Then we just laid there. 

“Must you go, Pierre?” I whispered, my voice hoarse, but emotionless. 

“I must. I have given my word,” he answered me, but his voice was pained. 

“Must you stay?” he asked me after a moment. “Is there really nothing that could persuade you to come?”

I thought I was too drained to feel any more sorrow, but his tone was so anguished I still felt a stab to my heart. 

“Nothing, mon ami. I don’t want to be a woman, a wife, or a mother. I want to sail the world aboard the Nautilus,” I answered, managing to say this with some resolve. He turned my face up to meet his eyes. 

“You are a woman, chérie. A remarkable one. I will miss you with all my heart,” he said with a sad smile. I could not help but shed another tear as I looked at him. I leant forward, and gently kissed him. As we opened our eyes, he looked at me questioningly. 

“I have nothing else to give you to remember me by,” I said sheepishly. He laughed softly. 

“I could not ever forget you, Eleonora, but I will cherish it all the same.”

I put my head down on his chest again, hugging him tightly, and we laid together in silence. 

“Shall we have a cigar, chérie?” Pierre asked me in a lighter tone, after what must have been many hours. I had to laugh a little.

“I’ve never heard a better idea, mon ami,” I sighed. We finally arose, having reached the closest thing to acceptance of the situation that we would achieve. Going into the lounge, Pierre checked the compass, and it confirmed we were still heading closer to the coast. We sat in the library, the cigars a welcome relaxant, and talked of all we had experienced so far. I could tell Pierre was deeply unhappy to be leaving his voyage under the seas half-finished, and although he did his best to keep the mood up, it seemed a hopeless cause. 

“Will you tell the Capitaine that I am sorry?” he said suddenly, in an anguished voice. I quieted, and looked at him. I understood how much it must pain him to part ways with that man, whom he so admired. I understood it better than anyone. 

“I will,” I answered in a serious tone. He nodded.

“Give him my promise that none of his secrets will be revealed by my lips,” he added. 

“I will tell him, my friend,” I said, deep compassion in my voice.

“Do you think he really never leaves?” he then said, surprising me, but I knew what he meant.

“I’m not sure. I hope to find out,” I answered, with a hopeless laugh.

“Surely your staying must let him know he can trust you, chérie,” he said, and now it was his turn to sound compassionate. I reached for his hand. 

“I hope so, mon ami.” Perhaps that would be the outcome, in time, but I feared his initial reaction to learning of me knowing of the escape. 

We strolled through the lounge together one last time, Pierre growing more despondent by the minute. I don’t know what possessed him to do so, but he walked up to Captain Nemo’s door, and went inside the stateroom. I rushed after him.

“Pierre..!” I whispered, panicked that his resolve had left him, and he had decided to confront the Captain. But as I entered the room, I found him alone in there, studying the portraits on the wall. I recognised a few of them, known freedom fighters, liberators, and felt with renewed certainty that I would not be opposed to the grand cause of the Nautilus. I also saw a portrait of a young lady, two small children in her arms, and wondered how it tied in with the rest. Then my eyes fell to a photograph I recognised, with my face in the foreground, the rest of the crew behind me, and my heart swelled. Pierre suddenly shuddered.

“Mademoiselle, vite, let’s go,” he said, and we left the room in a hurry. 

We shared his dinner when it was delivered, neither of us very hungry, but I made him eat the majority, hoping it would give him some strength. As he got dressed in the warmest gear we had been provided, I just sat silent, watching him. I had been debating whether to tell him a piece of information that I couldn’t possibly know, but as the hour was almost upon us, felt I could not withhold it.

“Professor, will you promise me something?” I asked, just as he was putting on his otter cap.

“Mais oui, chérie, anything,” he said, turning around. I had to smile, he looked so sweet, but then I grew serious again.

“Pierre, in the summer of 1870, will you take Conseil, and go on holiday? Or some expedition, I do not care, as long as you are not in Paris when autumn comes! Make plans to stay away for a full year, if you can,” I implored him, and he stared at me. 

“Mademoiselle..?” 

“Please, just promise me!” I said in a fervent tone. I thought he would assume I had lost my mind, but something in my face must have convinced him otherwise.

“Je te promets,” he said seriously, still staring. I nodded. I couldn’t remember the exact dates, or the length of the siege, but knew it had been winter, and didn’t want to take any chances. 

“Good. Are you ready?”

Chapter Text

A few minutes to nine, we were waiting in the library, both too agitated to stand still. The professor would go to check the compass every thirty seconds, waiting for Ned Land’s signal, but another event preceded this. We felt the Nautilus’s propeller slow down, before coming to a complete stop, and I exchanged a worried glance with Pierre. Something was off. Had the Captain and his crew predicted the escape attempt after all? We were stood frozen, neither of us knowing what our next course of action ought to be, when the door to the lounge opened. 

“Ah, professor, miss Larsson, I’ve been looking for you! Do you know your Spanish history?” asked the Captain in a cheery tone. We both stared at him as if he had been a ghost, a terrible apparition, neither of us replying. He seemed unphased by this.

“Well? Did you hear my question? Do you know the history of Spain?” he asked again, raising his eyebrows. Me and Pierre gave each other a glance of utter confusion, before replying evasively.

“Very little of it,” he said.

“Yes, same for me, I’m afraid,” I mumbled. 

“The most learned men,” said the Captain. “... and women, still have much to learn. Have a seat and I’ll tell you about an usual episode in that body of history.”

He stretched out on a sofa, and we reluctantly sat down near him. I saw the Captain looking us up and down, and he must hade noted how Pierre was dressed.

“Are you cold, sir?” he asked him, in an amused tone. I felt myself pale. He knew. He must know. 

“You as well, miss? You’re shaking!” he added, still in that amused tone. If it had not been true before, I did feel a chill run through me from fear. 

“Oh, yes, it’s a bit chilly this evening, sir…” I said weakly. 

“I’ve warmed up sufficiently, mademoiselle, take my coat,” said the professor, handing it to me, and taking off his cap. I have to admit I was impressed with the way he told this lie, perhaps the best performance in dishonesty he would ever give. I wrapped the heavy coat around me, hoping it would have the effect of a weighted blanket, as the Captain continued;

“Give me your best attention, my friends. This piece of history will definitely hold your interest, since it answers a question you surely haven’t ben able to resolve.” I dreaded what he was about say, feeling it must somehow pertain to our planned betrayal, which I felt in equal part guilty of, despite not joining the escapees. Imagine my astonishment and perplexity, surely shared by the professor, as Captain Nemo gave us a detailed description of, well, Spanish history. I felt almost too dazed to take in what he was saying, only listening to see if there was any hint of the Captain suspecting our plan. I left the professor to give what little encouragement the Captain needed to continue his tale. Once he finished, he invited us to come with him into the lounge. On the seafloor, as far as the eye could see, were the remnants of that piece of history he had just shared with us. We watched as the crew outside harvested an enormous mass of wealth, yet what couldn’t have been even a fraction of the treasure, while the professor and Captain Nemo discussed the riches contained in the seas across the globe. 

“Do you understand now that I’m rich to the tune of billions?” asked Captain Nemo. I nodded, wondering how much of it would be left in a hundred years, when the means to retrieve these riches were more readily available. 

“You best be careful the professor doesn’t decide to guillotine you, sir, after discovering your wealth. He is French, after all,” I joked weakly, having gathered myself somewhat, but my voice still wavered. The Captain laughed heartily, his good mood sustaining. Even Pierre had to laugh, grateful for my attempt at normalcy, I think. 

“I promise to do nothing of the sort. But let me point out, Capitaine, that in harvesting this same Vigo Bay, you’re simply beating a rival organisation to the punch,” said the professor. I was beyond surprised to hear this, my assumption as to the delay in this taking place being wrong, and even more surprised to hear that the value of the treasure before us was estimated to a hundred million dollars. I dizzied thinking of what that would be worth in my time. 

“It was worth a hundred million, but not any longer,” said Captain Nemo. 

“Right. So a timely warning to those investors would be an act of charity. Yet who knows if it would be well received? What gamblers usually regret the most isn’t losing their money but giving up their lunatic dreams,” answered Pierre, and I shot him a glance. Was this him trying to come to terms with Ned Land’s plan being thwarted? He continued in a slightly bitter tone, very unlike him;

“In the long run, though, I feel less sorry for them than for the thousands of poverty-stricken people who would have benefited from a fair distribution of this wealth, but now it will be of no help to them!” I stared at him, baffled by this sudden outburst. Was he so angry at Captain Nemo for interrupting their escape? The man in question stared at him too for a second, before exclaiming in anger;

“No help! So you think, sir, that this wealth goes to waste once I gather it? You believe I work to amass this treasure out of selfishness? Who says I don't put it to good use? Do you think I don’t know about the suffering individuals and oppressed races living on this earth, poor people to comfort, victims to avenge? Don’t you understand…” He stopped himself suddenly, surely feeling he had said too much. He regained his usual composure, and with a curt bow, left us. I stared after him, then turned to Pierre, but was taken aback when I saw the smug grin on his face. I furrowed my brows, and looked at him questioningly.

“We may not have gained our freedom tonight, mademoiselle, but we did gain some answers,” he told me with a cunning smile. My mouth fell open. 

“You tricked him!” I whispered, completely astonished. He put an arm around me. 

“Since he will not reveal anything willingly, it seems the only way. I am relieved, chérie, for I think you have been right. The Captain is a freedom fighter, and I will feel better leaving you to join the Nautilus’s mission when the day does come,” he said, squeezing me tight. I looked up at him in absolute wonderment, beyond impressed. He continued to surprise me, and as the relief of knowing I would at least have another day with him flooded me, I had to laugh. He grinned at me, justifiably proud of himself, and I think, relieved as well. 

Chapter Text

A quiet knock awoke us, but before either of us could answer, the door opened. I blinked in the sudden light from the corridor, and saw a large silhouette in the frame. Pierre reached over and turned on the lights in his room, and we saw Ned Land standing frozen in the doorway, his mouth hanging open. We just stared at each other for a moment, before he suddenly began to laugh. He laughed and laughed, before finally calming down enough to come inside, closing the door behind him. 

“So you really did have better options!” he managed to get out, before laughing some more.

“I beg your pardon, professor, it’s just I thought…” he said, gesturing, but then waving it off.

“Ah, nevermind! I’m happy for you,” he said, wiping a tear from his eye, and sitting down on the chair. Poor Ned, I think he would have laughed even harder had he seen that we were both still fully clothed under the covers.

“Now I see why you didn’t want to marry me, then, ma’am. I apologise, it was nothing personal, I understand,” he said generously, nodding to us. I think both me and Pierre were too stunned at this sudden turn of events to say anything, but we glanced at each other, and came to a mutual understanding to not correct Ned Land’s misreading of the situation for the time being. Having collected himself somewhat, Pierre sat up in bed. 

“So, Ned, the fates were against us yesterday,” he said, clearing his voice. 

“Not against you, it seems!” he snorted, but received a glare from the both of us.

“Sorry, sorry… but yes, that damned Captain had to call a halt right when we were ready to escape from his boat!” 

“Yes, Ned, he had business with his banker,” answered Pierre cryptically. He relayed the events of last night, and Ned expressed deep regret at not having had the chance to harvest some of the treasure for himself. 

“So you see, Ned my friend, that the Captain is perhaps a hero! We may have been too hasty to judge his actions!” the professor implored, but Ned only scoffed at this.

“Sure he is, and I’m the queen of England. Anyhow, this isn’t over yet! My first harpoon missed, that’s all. We’ll pull it off the next time, and as soon as this evening if it comes to that…” He stopped himself.

“Unless either of you have changed your minds, considering… this?” he said, gesturing towards us. We looked at each other, but of course, nothing had changed since yesterday.

“No, Ned. We will continue as planned,” sighed Pierre, and I couldn’t help but feel a pang of regret. I realised I had, in spite of better knowing, hoped he might have rethought his decision after changing his mind on the Captain’s intentions.

“What is the Nautilus’s heading?” he asked the Canadian.

“I have no idea,” he replied.

“All right, at noon we’ll find out what our position is,” Pierre said resolutely, and my lesser self hoped we would be far out to sea. 

You can imagine the excruciating hours until noon, with me secretly hoping there would be no escape attempt that night, Ned desperately hoping there would be, and poor Pierre caught in the middle. We did not speak of Ned’s assumption, in the case it might soon be a non-issue. As noon approached, we were all up on the platform, awaiting our sentencing, and I could barely greet Kumar in my anxious state. We had to wait a little to check the position marked on the chart in the lounge, to not rouse unnecessary suspicion. I stood wringing my hands as Pierre went up to it, not daring to check myself, and at first was unsure what it meant when he turned around with a big smile on his face.

“We are a hundred and fifty leagues from any coast, mademoiselle,” he stated, and I threw myself in his arms, unable to stop a cry of relief escaping me. He hugged me tightly, laughing, and I could finally breathe again. I left it to him to tell poor Ned of this development, while seating myself by the lounge window, looking out it in complete serenity. 

“Professor… Now that you will be staying for the foreseeable future… Well, I wanted to ask…” I tried to put my question forward, after he rejoined me. 

“Oui, chérie?” he asked, looking at me imploringly.

“Would you mind terribly if we were to… not correct mr. Land in his assumption of… us?” I asked clumsily. He did not answer at once, and I continued.

“You see, he is not the first to make it, and I may have… let them continue to think so,” I finally admitted. He looked down, and sighed.

“Eleonora, tu sais… Alors, you know I hold you in the highest regard, mais-”

“No, no, please, you misunderstand me!” I exclaimed, taking his hand, and he met my eyes.

“I love you dearly, Pierre, but only as a friend. It’s just that it would make things easier, for me, if certain people onboard were allowed to continue their belief otherwise,” I said sheepishly. He gazed at me in relief, and patted my hand.

“If that is the case, chérie, I do not see why not,” he smiled gently after thinking it over for a moment. I relaxed.

“Oh, thank you, mon ami, thank you” I sighed. He chuckled.

“Mais non, thank you. I am flattered,” he said jokingly, and I smiled at him. 

“I would hate to hurt Ned Land’s feelings, especially since he was so happy for us. But may I ask who these other individuals are?” he enquired, still in a light tone of voice. I blushed slightly, and had to look away. 

“Oh, uh… That would be… well, mainly… mainly the Captain…” I answered, barely enunciating the words at the end. Pierre’s expression changed.

“Ah, je comprends,” he said after a moment, in a much more serious tone. 

“Alors, perhaps this arrangement will benefit us both, mademoiselle,” he added quietly, looking straight ahead, but I could see a shadow pass over his face. This was by far the closest he’d ever come to admitting his feelings for the Captain to me, and I didn’t want to make him regret it, so I didn’t push it further. I simply put a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it lightly. 

Chapter Text

Despite the threat of having to part ways with Pierre no longer imminent, I’m not sure either of us had truly grasped the fact fully. We had spent close to every minute since entering the Mediterranean in each other’s company, believing our time together was limited, and now found it difficult to go back to a more normal amount of companionship. Last night I had stayed with him in his cabin, since we could not know if today would afford them a chance to escape, but now we had no such worries. Still, we were reluctant to bid each other goodnight, after having found such comfort in there being another heartbeat, another living being next to us through the anxious night. So, I stayed late into the evening with Pierre in his room, and he seemed grateful for it. I do not know whether I would have stayed the whole night again, had we not been interrupted. A knock at the door leading to the Captain’s room stopped our affable conversing, and I thought he would ask us to quiet down, seeing how the time was approaching eleven o’clock. 

“Entrez!” Captain Nemo did so, and for a moment I thought he looked almost wary as he opened the door, but his expression was back to its normal easiness within a second. 

“Forgive us, Captain, we won’t disturb you any longer. We ought to retire as well,” I said, aiming to be gracious, but the Captain looked almost hurt by my suggestion. Was he quite alright? 

“You weren’t disturbing me in the slightest, miss Larsson, and I was hoping you might be amenable to doing quite the opposite of retiring. That is, unless you both are too tired from last night?” he asked, causing both me and Pierre to startle slightly, before he added;

“From our vigil, that is.” We both tried to suppress a sigh of relief, before assuring him that not at all, we were in high spirits still. 

“Then, my friends, I propose an unusual excursion.” 

“Propose away, Capitaine,” Pierre urged him in good humour. 

“Till now you’ve visited the ocean depths only by day and under sunlight. Would you like to see them on a dark night?” Our eyes widened in surprise, and we heartily agreed.

“I warn you, this will be a tiring stroll. We’ll need to walk long hours and scale a mountain. The roads aren’t terribly well kept up. It may prove too arduous an adventure for a lady,” he said, raising his eyebrows to me.

“Are you trying to spur me on by suggesting I’m not up for it? If so, it has worked,” I replied smiling, not falling for his obvious trick. 

“You have me all figured out, miss,” he replied with a warm smile, and my heart almost skipped a beat. I wondered if that effect would ever wear off. 

“Indeed, sir, what you are telling us makes it sound twice as intriguing. Count us in,” said the professor enthusiastically.

As we headed off, I was surprised to see the expedition would consist of just the three of us. It was an arduous journey indeed, the terrain made for extremely difficult walking, and we were helped only by the alpenstocks the Captain had provided us with. He had been correct when he said we wouldn’t need our flashlights, for as we left the Nautilus’s mile-wide beacon light behind, the waters were instead dimly lit up by a strange, red glow. It came from a spot about another mile away, and as the ground rose slowly, I realised what it must be. An underwater volcano! That was why we had had to undertake this expedition at night. I was instantly energised from the prospect of witnessing this marvel up close, and continued on with renewed vigor. There was a strange sound heard above, a steady pattering, and I wondered if it came from some ship’s engine, when Pierre turned around to me. He held up his hands over his head as if to shield himself from rain, and I realised what the sound was. I laughed at his silliness, shaking my head. As we walked on, myriads of mildly phosphorescent plants and animals lit our way, and the path we treaded was made up of strangely symmetrical stones. If I hadn’t known better I would have said they were pavement stones, and I was intrigued to think what natural phenomenon could have created such a path. For two hours we followed Captain Nemo, who led our way with majestic assurance. He had without a doubt travelled this path several times prior, and knew it well. As we reached the bottom of the volcano, we were met by the strangest sight. It looked like a forest of petrified trees! Were they a type of coral, or some long since extinguished hydrothermal vents? I had never seen anything like it. Going further up the mountain, we were met by several creatures I should not soon forget. Giant crustaceans, the size of a grown man, ten times bigger than any I’d ever seen in a natural history museum, made their homes on the rocky mountainside. I was mesmerised, terrified, exhilarated, but was soon urged on by Captain Nemo to continue our journey. Perhaps it was for the best, I knew how fierce even a two inch shore crab could be, and the claws of these beast would have surely been able to snap any of us in half. Spurred on by the thought, I hurried along with my companions. As we reached a plateau, the sight from it made me forget all other wonders. Stretching out in front of us was ruins, yes, actuals ruins, of an antique city. How can I describe the stunned amazement with which I witnessed this? I have been to the Forum Romanum, I’ve been to Ostia, and I’ve been to Pompei, and here were all these ancient wonders gathered together, on the bottom of the Atlantic! The formations we’d seen had been not been hydrothermal vents, they had been actual trees, petrified! This was some, yet in my time, undiscovered sunken landmass. Lit up by the red glow from the volcano, we could see the city before us. What civilisation had built it? Captain Nemo would soon give us the answer, but for now, he urged us on even further. We soon reached the peak of the volcano, and could from here see the full expanse of this underwater marvel. Temples, palaces, amphitheatres, even a port, it was all visible, and I wondered if I might be dreaming. I felt myself dizzying, and grabbed Pierre’s arm for support. He seemed in a fervor, his body language conveying the same desperation for answers that surged within me. Captain Nemo gestured for us to watch as he scrawled a single word on the basalt rock; ‘Atlantis’. 

I can’t have been unconscious for more than half a minute, but awoke in Pierre’s arms, Captain Nemo shaking me vigorously. I sat up, dazed, and waved them off. Perhaps the Captain had been right, this was too much for a lady. At least for a lady who, despite what she had already seen on this voyage, still believed all wonders of the world had long since been discovered in the 21st century. How wrong I’d been. I sat there for a few seconds, reevaluating my entire existence, before being helped up by my kind companions. We went to sit down together on an overgrown pillar, fallen since millenia, and took in the view for the next hour. I contemplated my strange fate, but no longer regretted any part of it. Had I not always longed for adventure, away from the dull existence of everyday life? I had been granted my wish, and struggled to accept the reality of my fortune, but tried my best all the same.

Chapter Text

I awoke late the next day, still dazed, and was half-convinced last night’s excursion had been some strange fever dream. Only when I came into the lounge and saw the evidence of its reality outside the window was I able to consolidate myself with it. Pierre and Conseil were already there, the former giving the latter the history of this long lost civilisation, but as he seemed too distracted to take it in, I made Pierre relay it to me in English instead. As he enthusiastically did so, I listened intently while watching the spectacular marine life pass by outside. I again found myself beyond grateful to whatever powers had transported me here, thinking what I could have possibly done to deserve this being my new everyday life. 

I went down to the mess hall for some very late breakfast. Brunch even, and scoffed to myself at the thought. Somehow I doubted there would be mimosas. The room was almost deserted, and I figured I may as well eat quickly, to then rejoin Pierre and Conseil. Although, I was quite famished, not having eaten since well before the excursion last night, and had to help myself to a rather large portion. The concept of the mess hall was that of a modern buffet, with food always available during the day, since the schedule onboard meant there weren’t any set meal times. Breakfast and dinner were naturally busiest, but so far I had yet to find it deserted at any time of day. I sat down by myself after politely nodding to the other few crewmen there, since I didn’t know any of them that well. Finishing the portion in a rather unladylike time, I went for seconds, and was just heading back to my seat when Kumar entered. After helping himself to a plate as well, he sat down with me.

“Late morning, Madam?” he teased.

“Busy night last night,” I explained, grabbing another large bite.

“Two nights in a row, I hear,” he said with a sly grin. I stopped chewing for a second, cold fear gripping me. I still suspected the Captain had guessed what had been going on regarding the escape attempt, but could not explain his generosity in bringing us with him to Atlantis, rather than punishing us. I tried to act unphased, changing the subject.

“You didn’t want to come with us to Atlantis?” I asked, managing a carefree tone, although I don’t know how, considering the bizarre sentence. 

“I’ve seen it before,” he shrugged.

“Oh, of course. Once you’ve seen it, you’ve seen it,” I said sarcastically. He chuckled.

“I do have duties onboard, you know. I can’t go gallivanting on sightseeing whenever I like.” 

“Ah, unlike me, you mean,” I laughed, and he grinned at me.

“Enjoy it while you can, Madam. We’ll put you to work soon enough.”

“With what?” I asked, still eager to take on some actual responsibilities. 

“Deck swabbing,” he jeered. 

“Ugh, I can’t wait!” I exclaimed enthusiastically, making him laugh. I’d finished my food, and was about to rise when he stopped me.

“How’s my old room? Still comfortable, Madam?” he asked innocently, but his eyes glinted knowingly. I paled. Suddenly I wasn’t so sure if the idea of my pretend relationship with Professor Aronnax had been so great after all. I cleared my throat. 

“How’s that telepathic link, Kumar? Still going strong?” I asked, trying to sound unaffected. I’m not sure why I had thought Captain Nemo would have been unaware of me staying with Pierre two nights ago, and realised that might have been what Kumar’s comment had been about, rather than the planned escape. But why did I care what either of them thought about it? Had this not been my intention with not revealing that me and the professor were nothing but friends? 

“Always, however, it wasn’t needed this time. News travel fast aboard the Nautilus,” he said, and his expression was neutral, I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. I felt myself blushing slightly. It was one thing to keep up appearances to placate Ned Land, and to keep the Captain from guessing my feelings for him, but I hadn’t planned for the whole crew to know. 

“I’m not sure how this is anyone else’s business, sir,” I said sternly. 

“Perhaps it is not, Madam, but it does complicate my chess game. When I said you could move in any direction across the board, this is not what I had in mind, little Rani,” he said, his voice cold. I frowned, sick of the constant secrecy. 

“What did you have in mind?” I asked him boldly, intently holding his gaze. This seemed to make him a little uncomfortable, and he had to look away. 

“I wasn’t expecting the chess pieces to put up so much resistance,” he mumbled in a sour tone. 

“Perhaps that’s because I’m not a chess piece,” I hissed, and went to put my plate away. 

“The Captain would like to see you,” Kumar called after me, and I froze. Never too late for repercussions, I suppose, but was too annoyed to show how uneasy his news made me.

“And he is welcome to do so. I shall be with Pierre in the lounge. Or perhaps in your old room,” I said over my shoulder, unable to stop myself from adding the unnecessary jab. 

I knew I had been rude, I should have asked where I might find the Captain, if he wanted to meet with me, not where he could come find me. But I had been well annoyed by the presumptiveness of Kumar. I assumed I’d have to pay the price sooner or later. I managed to calm down a little by the time I came back to the lounge, but dreaded my meeting with Captain Nemo. What did he want anyway? Did he object, despite admitting himself that Pierre would be a good match for me? And then there was Kumar, with his frustrating metaphors. Between the two of them, I did in fact feel a little bit like a chess piece. Except I was able to make my own moves too. Although I didn’t always understand how the game was played. I sighed deeply, and went to light a cigar. The door from the library into the salon was open, and Pierre heard me return.
“Ah, mademoiselle, how was your breakfast?” he called. I sank down onto a sofa.

“Awful,” I replied, cigar in mouth. He left Conseil, and came up to me.

“What has happened, chérie?” he ventured to ask in a careful tone, reading my annoyed expression.

“It seems we are the talk of the town, mon ami,” I told him, exhaling a cloud of smoke. His eyes widened.

“Déjà? Mon Dieu, I had no idea we were so interesting!” he said in a carefree tone, not seeming too upset at this information. I met his eyes.

“You don’t mind?” 

“Not in particular, no, but I don’t see why it should concern anyone else, en fait,” he said, shrugging, and sat down next to me. 

“Well, it seems it does. The Captain wants to see me,” I admitted reluctantly. Pierre raised his eyebrows. 

"Pourquoi?” he huffed, “Even if it was true, I don’t see why he would have any objections!” 

I gave a bitter smile, remembering how Captain Nemo had claimed to be so very sorry that Pierre’s disposition should prevent us being together. Perhaps he simply wanted to congratulate us. Somehow though, I found that hard to believe. 

“No, I agree. Still, I wanted to make sure you haven’t changed your mind? If you have, I will tell him the truth,” I said earnestly, the last thing I wanted to do was put Pierre in an uncomfortable position. He reached over and grabbed my cigar, taking a deep drag from it before giving it back. Which I found embarrassingly hot, to my great dismay, and I had to look away. Maybe this was a bad idea after all. 

“Not on my account, chérie. I am happy with the arrangement,” he said calmly. I met his gaze, and he gave me a one sided smile. His grey eyes glinted behind a lock of the dark blonde hair as he looked at me, and I suddenly felt myself blushing. My god, I was a maenad. I stared straight ahead, contemplating this while puffing the cigar. I did know how to pick them, didn’t I? The unattainable Captain and the very much gay professor. Perfect. I sighed and shook my head.

“Very well, sir, then I will stick to our story,” I said stoically, and he arose to rejoin Conseil. I decided my feelings could all be blamed on how much time we’d spent together lately, and vowed to myself that we would not sleep in the same bed again, since I was clearly unable to differentiate between friendship and romance. This would pass soon enough, now that everything was back to normal.

Chapter Text

I rejoined my friends in the lounge, and their chatting, and the sights passing by the window soon took my mind off of things. This respite didn’t last long though, as Captain Nemo soon appeared. 

“Miss Larsson?” came his deep voice from behind us, and in that moment I instantly regretted my words to Kumar. They would surely not go unpunished. Squeezing my eyes shut for a moment, I gathered what courage I could, before turning around.

“Yes, Captain?” I said, with a smile. I was determined to be professional, feeling as though I had been called into an HR meeting. 

“I need to speak with you. If you would join me, please,” he said, gesturing to his stateroom. I stared for a moment. Somehow his choice of meeting room made me terribly uncomfortable. I gulped, but nodded, receiving a sympathetic look from Pierre. I wondered if the Captain would speak to him afterwards. Perhaps he thought we needed to know about the birds and the bees. I tried to suppress a laugh at the thought. As we entered the room, the Captain graciously offered me the chair, but did not take a seat himself. Instead, he crossed his arms, and stood before me. I was squirming a little, the whole situation was making me feel terribly uneasy. I could still not imagine what he wanted, apart from scolding me for the way I’d spoken to Kumar. He was silent for a long while, before sighing deeply.

“Have you changed your mind about joining our crew, miss?” he asked me, and his words surprised me beyond belief. Was that the conclusion he had come to from this? I looked up, meeting his eyes, and they were anguished. All my other feelings were instantly replaced by a desire to ease his pain.

“No, sir! Not at all,” I exclaimed, but was suddenly gripped by fear.

“... Have you?” I asked, trying to sound unaffected, despite my stomach twisting at the thought. He got down on one knee, studying me, and I can’t have done a very good job at hiding my fear, for he smiled compassionately.

“Not at all.” I took a shaky breath in, and had to close my eyes for a second, relief flooding me. When I opened them, he was still looking at me intently. 

“I was asking because this development may have made you rethink your wishes. You understand that you will not be allowed to share any of our secrets with Professor Aronnax, once you are made privy to them,” he said in a serious tone. I nodded.

“I understand, Captain. I will not speak of them,” I answered in an equally serious tone. He sighed, and arose. 

“Good. So, miss, it would appear we were wrong,” he said, and I couldn’t quite understand the tone of his voice. It was almost annoyed. I looked at him questioningly. 

“About the professor. Although, I’m not sure the path you have chosen will prove any easier, than had we been correct in our assumption,” he explained, and I realised what he meant. Of course, it might appear a strange choice to him, to enter into a relationship with someone I would never be able to share my existence with. Which meant, even if he did suspect that my three companions would try to escape, he was sure they would not succeed, and stay aboard indefinitely. I wasn’t sure what to say.

“I’ve made my choice,” I answered simply, with a slight shrug. He could think of it what he wanted, since his information was wrong on so many accounts. Captain Nemo was silent again, and I wondered if this meant we were done here. When he did not say anything more, I assumed so, glad to have avoided the scolding, and began to rise.

“There is one more matter I need to speak with you on, and you must forgive me for doing so,” he said, and I sat down again, perplexed. I watched him warily, and he seemed uncharacteristically uncomfortable. 

“Yes, Captain?” I urged him, beginning to feel unsure myself. If it was indeed time for the scolding, he would not behave in this way, I didn’t think. He had begun pacing the floor.

“I must urge that you take every precaution, miss, for we simply cannot have a baby aboard the Nautilus! You must understand that I am beyond regretful to deprive you of this, but once you have the full story, I believe you will see why!” he finally exclaimed, and his expression was yet again pained. I blinked, too stunned to speak, and he yet again got down in front of me, taking my hand.

“Eleonora, it brings me great sorrow that you should have to give this up, but I hope that in time-” he began ardently, but was interrupted by my laugh. Now it was his turn to blink, and indeed be as stunned as I had been. I felt a little bad at dismissing him like this when he was clearly so torn up about it, but the thought was simply too ridiculous. Firstly, that Pierre would ever actually be in danger of impregnating me, when all we had done was innocently sleep in the same bed, fully clothed. Secondly, that I should ever want to get pregnant. Christ, never. Not in my time, and certainly not in this one. Thirdly, because I didn’t think I could, even if I had wanted to. My period had always been irregular at best, and an absolute nightmare when it did arrive, and I had not had one since long before coming aboard the Nautilus. In all honesty, I hoped it was gone for good. I continued to laugh, and I think the Captain worried I had lost my mind, mad with grief over his terrible news, so I finally had to collect myself. I patted his hand that was still holding mine.

“You needn’t worry, Captain,” I managed to get out. I’d never actually seen him genuinely dumbstruck before, and the look on his face made me laugh even more. I couldn’t believe I’d been right. He really had wanted to give me ‘the talk’. He frowned in confusion, and went to sit down at the foot of his bed. 

“Have I misread the situation, miss? Have you and Aronnax… were our assumptions correct from the beginning?” he asked, but I couldn’t throw my friend under the bus like that, voiding his benefit of the agreement, so settled for explaining my other reasoning.

“Forgive me, I shouldn’t laugh. I don’t need to have the full story to understand why the Nautilus would be a less than ideal environment for a child, but you haven’t deprived me of anything. I have never in my life wanted to be a mother. I want to sail the world!” I smiled, hoping my honest words would ease his worry, but he only looked bewildered. 

“But you do understand… You see, there are preventative methods that can be utilised, not that we’ve had any need of it onboard before, but there is a tea that can be brewed-” 

“Captain, if the need should arise, I will ask for it,” I said calmly, unable not to smile at the way he was so clearly uncomfortable with the subject, and felt that for once, I had the upper hand. He looked at me in astonishment, shaking his head.

“Then you haven’t..?” 

“Christ, you’re inquisitive! It doesn’t matter, sir, I cannot have children!” I exclaimed, for even if I was wrong, there would never be a way to disprove it. I wondered where this sudden nosiness was coming from. I worried I would accidentally reveal the ruse if he kept at it, so I resorted to trying to shock him into silence, daunting as the task was.

“Surely you do not have enough serious accidents onboard for people not to take notice of bloody rags in the laundry?” I asked with a meaning look, and I think I saw him actually flush a little at this scandalous mention. I felt a sudden thrill at being the one in control of the situation, for the first time, with him being the one stumbling. I looked on smugly as he struggled to find the words, before taking pity on him.

“I’m sorry to have scandalised you so, but you’re the one who brought it up,” I said unapologetically. 

“Not at all, miss. I’m… I’m sorry,” he said, starting to pace again, trying to regain his usual composure, with some success. I raised my eyebrows.

“What for? For bringing it up?” I asked mercilessly. 

“No, that you cannot…”

“That I cannot have children? Please, don’t be. I’m not,” I said earnestly. He stopped to look at me.

“Truly?” he asked, his expression wide-eyed and hopeful. Seeing him like this, as I never had before, suddenly made me feel protective, made me want to comfort him as he had me many times. I smiled warmly.

“Truly. I’m not quite kind enough to lie about such a matter to spare your feelings. As I’ve said, I never wanted them. I want adventure. I want to sail the seas with you,” I said, but then lost some of my control, realising my last words had been dangerously close to a confession. I had to look away, and the power balance regained some normalcy. He sank back down onto the bed, contemplating this. 

“This is not how I imagined this conversation going,” he stated, and I had to laugh a little. ‘No, I bet’, I thought, and wondered how many times in his life someone had managed to get the upper hand over this always so collected individual. 

“Well, you know me, Captain, I like to surprise,” I joked, meeting his eyes again. He gazed at me in wonder. 

“That you do. You are a surprising woman,” he said, his eyes gleaming. I looked at him, a small smile playing on my lips, and we were silent for a little while. 

“I’m so relieved, Eleonora. I would hate to deprive you of anything in life,” he then said earnestly, and suddenly I was back in his power, drawn into his gaze, forgetting all sense of wit and retort. He must have felt the balance shifting back fully, for he straightened, and looked almost smug for a second, before resuming his forever serene expression. It had been nice to glimpse the other side for a moment, and I felt a rush thinking that it was possible at all, but in truth, I didn’t mind us resuming as normal. Before it was gone for good though, I grasped at the last straw of whatever power I felt, I answered him;

“I doubt you ever will, Odysseus.” He gave me the satisfaction of blinking in surprise, and I warmed in delight at this. 

“Well, I don’t need to keep you from the professor any longer,” he said after a moment, clearing his throat. 

“Is that what you were doing last night?” I blurted out. Christ, I had become mad with power, wanting to see if I could throw him off just once more. I hoped he would blush again, seeing it had been like a drug to me. ‘Maenad’, I reprimanded myself, but I had not succeeded this time. He only grinned.

“Let’s call our excursion taking place last night a fortunate coincidence,” he replied, and I shook my head with a smile. 

“If you say so,” I said in a light tone, and left him in his stateroom. 

I was mightily pleased with myself, having taken control of the situation, not revealed anything I did not want to, and even managed to see the stoic Captain dumbstruck. I almost skipped into the lounge, and Pierre watched me in wonder. Conseil seemed to have retired.

“It went well, then, chérie?” he asked, and I had to laugh. I only nodded, gesturing for him to come into the library so that I could recount the tale of my victory behind closed doors. He stared at me in wide-eyed wonder as I spoke, he flushed with embarrassment, he laughed at the absurdity, and then his eyes filled with sympathy.

“I am so sorry, chérie. I did not know,” he said, taking my hand. I had to roll my eyes.

“Not you too! I already told you once, I don’t want to be a mother! Not every woman does, you know? You don’t have children, surely you understand?” I said, exasperated, but stopped when I saw his expression. 

“I should have liked to,” he said in a quiet voice. I felt a lump in my throat, I shouldn’t have spoken so carelessly. 

“Pierre, forgive me,” I mumbled, and squeezed his hand in mine. 

“There’s nothing to forgive, mademoiselle. You didn’t know,” he said, but his voice was still sad. Was there a chance I had been mistaken after all? 

“Have you been married, professor?” I asked carefully, dreading that I would hurt him further.

“Non, chérie, I’ve been married to my work, always,” he said, waving me off. I couldn’t help but feel relieved, or our agreement might have had to come to an end immediately.

“Well, I think you would have made a wonderful father, mon ami, but the world would have been deprived of its foremost naturalist,” I said, trying to comfort him. He smiled a little at me. 

“Merci, chérie, you are too kind to me as always.”

“I only speak the truth, monsieur,” I stated, and meant every word.

Chapter Text

After travelling through time, and spending over three months aboard the Nautilus, I wasn’t in the habit of being easily surprised. Still, after Pierre knocked on my door in the morning and asked me if I wanted to take some air, and we came up onto the platform in total darkness, I had do admit to some surprise on my part. I took two stumbling steps before walking right into a tall figure, who grabbed me by the arms to steady me. 

“Is that you, miss Larsson?” I was suddenly thankful for the darkness, so that Captain Nemo could not see me flush red in embarrassment at my clumsiness. 

“So it would seem, Captain,” I said in a dry voice, and heard him scoff before letting me go.

“Ah, Capitaine Nemo! Where are we?” came Pierre’s voice. 

“Underground, professor.”

“Underground? And the Nautilus still floats?” he asked in astonishment.

“It always floats,” I replied in unison with the Captain, and felt him squeeze my shoulder. I beamed to myself in the darkness at this acknowledgement. 

“Mais, je ne comprends pas…” mumbled Pierre in confusion. 

“Wait a few seconds. Our beacon is about to go on, and if you want some light on the subject, you’ll have your wish.” The darkness also concealed my eye-roll at this very typical Nemo way of not simply answering the question. The beacon did indeed light up after a few seconds, and I was blinded for a moment. As my eyes adjusted, I looked around to see that we were in a massive cavern, the Nautilus floating next to a rocky embankment. After some more patient coaxing by the professor, Captain Nemo explained that we were inside an extinct volcano, that the sea had entered long ago, through the same tunnel that we had gone through during the night. 

“But why are we here?” I had to ask, despite not wanting to encourage the Captain’s frustrating habit. 

“To resupply our sodium reserves, miss.” He went on to explain, almost without further questioning, that the waters outside contained the coal from prehistoric forests needed to extract the sodium. However, as he was eager to continue our underwater tour of the world, the crew would not be mining any coal at this time, but draw from the already existing supply of sodium. We would stay only for the day, to load it onboard. 

“So, my friends, if you would like to explore this cavern and circle its lagoon, seize the day.” 

“Merci, Capitaine! Mademoiselle?” Pierre offered me his arm for us to go downstairs to fetch the others, but I had other plans. 

“You go, mon ami. I shall help the crew,” I said resolutely, not wanting to hear any more comments from Kumar about me ‘gallivanting on sightseeing’. Pierre looked a bit surprised, but conceded, and went down the companionway alone. I turned to see Captain Nemo watching me with an amused expression on his face. 

“Right. Let’s get to it. What is to be done, Captain?” I asked, ignoring his smirk. 

“We haven’t even moored properly yet, miss. Still, I would advise you to go with the others, I believe we can manage without you on this occasion,” he smiled, but I would not give up.

“Nonsense, I want to help!” I said indignantly.

“The crates weigh about fifty kilos each, miss,” he said, now smiling wide. I pursed my lips, too proud to admit defeat. I had obviously not been to the gym for a good while now, over a hundred and fifty years to be more specific, but it would not do to be treated differently from the rest of the crew. 

“I’ll manage,” I said stoically, holding my head high, and watched him trying to conceal his laugh with a cough. 

“Very well then, miss, we’ll be most grateful for the help, I’m sure,” he said, and I resented the laughter in his voice. I hoped my irritation would be enough to help me fulfill the task ahead. 

The majority of the crew was soon up on the platform, the Nautilus moored to the embankment, and the gangway laid down. I marched down it with the rest of the men, and saw as I passed them Kumar ask the Captain something, a frown on his face, while watching me. He replied, still smiling, and Kumar gave a bellowing laugh. I seethed with rage at their dismissal, and marched on with the crew, who looked at me with raised eyebrows. We reached the sodium storage, next to a large furnace which would not be in use today, and the men started carrying the filled crates back to the Nautilus. As it was my turn, I took a deep breath, and gripped a crate firmly. Lifting with my knees, I gave a great heave, and did manage to lift it up, to my great satisfaction. I started walking as my arms were cramping, the crew watching with mixed expressions of amusement, worry, and surprise. I managed to go less than ten meters before my strength gave out, and I set the crate down with an angry sigh. I looked around to see not only the remaining crewmen, but also Captain Nemo and Kumar suppressing laughter at my pathetic attempt. I shot my audience a death glare, before I started to drag the stupid crate along instead. My arms were shaking, and I was panting from the exertion, but would not be defeated. I got about another ten meters before I had to stop again, cursing my willfulness, and sat down on the object of my humiliation. I looked into the ground intently, ignoring what I know must have been entertained looks at my incapability, when suddenly I saw it disappear from under me. I was lifted into the air, still sitting on the crate, and gave a yelp of surprise. I felt a broad chest behind my back, and turned my head to meet Jakub’s wide grin. I sighed deeply, and hid my face in my hands as I shook my head, finally admitting defeat. I heard the crew laughing and jeering, and I had to laugh as well. I suppose I deserved it, being so stubborn, but tried to retain some dignity by accepting my fate. As I lifted my face I saw the others all looking on as Jakub carried the crate I had so struggled with, me on top of it, some of them doubling with laughter, and Kumar wiping a tear from his eye. Some were shouting encouragingly, saying I was doing a marvelous job, and I laughed even harder. Captain Nemo looked on with his fond smile, and I couldn’t help but make a self-depreciating joke to stop any other feelings from rushing to the surface. 

“I truly don’t know how you ever managed without me!” I shouted, throwing my hands in the air, and was met by more laughter. I saw the Captain chuckling, and saying something to Kumar without taking his eyes off me as I was carried off to the Nautilus. Before we got the gangway, Jakub bent down so that I could jump off. I patted him on the cheek.

“Thanks for saving me, mate,” I said dryly, and he grinned again, before taking the heavy load down the companionway. I was just about to follow him, when I was stopped by Captain Nemo calling me.

“Now wait a minute, miss Larsson, I believe you said you would help us?” I froze, and turned around with an expression of terror that made him grin menacingly. I walked over to him and Kumar where they were stood, taking account of the amount of sodium being taken aboard and how much would be left. 

“If you would provide me with a small teacup, or perhaps a spoon, I might be able to carry some sodium onboard in that!” I said in a tired voice. They both laughed at me, and I was relieved to see that Kumar didn’t seem to hold a grudge from our quarrel yesterday. 

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Madam, we did not think you would be able to even lift one in the first place,” he said kindly, and I smiled a little. 

“Well, what do you want me to say? I was wrong, I can’t help with this. There, happy?” I asked the Captain. He thought for a moment.

“Exceedingly so, it’s always a pleasure to be vindicated, but I wouldn’t say you haven’t helped. I don’t think we’ve ever enjoyed this dull task this much before,” he said with a meaning glance, and I sighed.

“Oh, well, the court jester is reporting for duty, sir,” I said sarcastically, saluting him, and he smiled fondly at me again while Kumar chuckled. 

“I was hoping you’d say that. Why don’t you sing us a song?” he said in a light tone, teasing me. My face dropped, and I was about to protest, but then thought of a better idea. With a slight smirk, I began singing;

I thought I heard the captain say

Pay me my money down

Tomorrow is our sailing day

Pay me my money down

Kumar doubled with laughter, and Captain Nemo glared at him. I winked to them with a smile and turned around to the crew.

“Come on, boys, you know this one!” 

Pay me, pay me

Pay me my money down

Pay me or go to jail

Pay me my money down

As soon as the boat was clear of the bar

Pay me my money down

He knocked me down with a spar

Pay me my money down

Those that didn’t know the song caught on quickly, and soon the lines going to and from the ship were both singing along, the empty-handed ones clapping to the beat with me. Our voices echoed in the great cavern;

Pay me, pay me

Pay me my money down

Pay me or go to jail

Pay me my money down

I turned around to see Kumar grinning widely to me, Captain Nemo shaking his head, but I could see him suppressing a smile, and felt elated at this. The singing went on for a good while, before I had to put an end to it. I happily applauded the crew, and some gave a smile and a sarcastic bow. Kumar was clapping enthusiastically too as I turned around, the Captain still trying to act unimpressed with my joke at his expense, but then Kumar dunked his back and he shook his head with a scoff. 

“Well, Captain? Did you not like the song?” I asked innocently.

“Not as much as some of your other ones,” he said dryly, but I could tell he was amused.

“Come now, no need to be sour. I invoke my jester’s privilege,” I said with a disarming gesture, and he finally laughed. Kumar was watching us with a pleased grin. 

“Which ones do you like, then?” I asked, extending the proverbial olive branch. He thought for a moment, then smirked with a dangerous glint in his eyes.

“What was that one from when we celebrated Twelfth night? About the woman?” I felt my confidence falter, and blushed a little. 

“I’m not sure that’s the best working song, sir,” I said evasively, having to cast my eyes down not to blush even more. 

“A shame, I thought it so fitting,” he said, and I looked up in astonishment. His expression was unreadable, but I refused to lose my composure. In his mind, I was in love with Pierre, and would have no reason to be affected in this way by his teasing. Best I kept up appearances. 

“You sing it then,” I challenged him, which made him smile. 

“I doubt I could do it anywhere near as well, miss,” he answered, unphased.

“Then I’m afraid it will have to wait, sir. I have better idea for now,” I said cheerfully, successfully hiding the effect his words had on me, and turned around. I collected myself for half a second, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, before starting the crew’s favourite song. I only had to sing the initial few notes before they were with me, picking up the chorus of The lion sleeps tonight. They were happy to sing it as always, and I went to climb up on the large pile of crates, needing some distance from the Captain’s intense gaze. It turned out to be our best performance to date, the resonance of the cave amplifying the tones to a new level. Riding the high from this success, I followed up the song with Proud Mary, which turned out to be another hit, the chorus easy follow along with here too. After deciding they might also like Take me home, country roads, which they did, I had to take a break, in spite of some protests. I was gallantly helped down from my perch, and had no choice but to rejoin the Captain and Kumar, since everyone else was busy working. 

“Well, Kumar, I don’t believe the men have ever undertaken this task with such vigor before,” said Captain Nemo with a glance at his papers. Kumar chuckled.

“No, indeed, but I do not know if their motivation comes from the singing or from the desire to appear strong in front the lady,” he said with a grin. I wanted to turn on my heel, but resolved to give as good as I got.

“What, you two handsome fellas aren’t motivation enough?” I asked teasingly, raising my eyebrows, and instantly regretted my words when I saw Captain Nemo’s almost predacious grin. I should have just turned around, I wasn’t ready for this kind of banter, at least not sober. Kumar must have seen my resolve falter and decided to take pity on me before the Captain had a chance to retort, for whatever he had in mind would have undoubtedly made me flush bright red.

“No, you’re right, Madam. It must have been the singing then,” Kumar stated with a resolute nod, and I breathed out a sigh of relief, immensely thankful for his joke. But apparently he wasn’t satisfied with only sparing me, but also decided to turn the tables on his friend. 

“Regardless of the reason, our dear Captain agreed that he does not know how we ever managed without you,” he said, and only returned the glare he received from the Captain with a smug smile. I blinked at them both, at first not understanding what he was getting at, before I remembered my joke from before. Was that really what the Captain had said to Kumar, as I was being carried off in defeat? I frowned, and couldn’t make my mind up on whether I or the Captain was meant to be the victim of this quip.

“I’m sure the Captain is well aware of when I’m being sarcastic, seeing as he is a master of the art himself,” I said, hoping it to be diplomatic enough to help either way. Kumar looked a little exasperated, but the Captain’s expression was unreadable as ever. I was feeling mightily uncomfortable, and would have preferred to run away, but couldn’t quite justify being so childish, so instead opted for changing the subject.

“So, gentlemen, where are we heading once the sodium is resupplied?” I asked, attempting a light tone. They exchanged a glance.

“You will find out in due time, miss,” said Captain Nemo in his infuriatingly calm way. I felt I had exhausted his patience of my stubbornness for the day, so decided to be complacent for once.

“How exciting. I love a surprise,” I said dryly, but they both chuckled at my expression, which must have betrayed what I really wanted to say. 

“Lovely weather today, isn’t it?” I continued, and the Captain frowned in confusion as Kumar looked around the weatherless cave.

“It is?”

“I have no idea, I just couldn’t think of a safer conversation topic,” I shrugged, and Kumar laughed as the Captain smiled. Our non-conversing was interrupted by a voice from the crew.

“Ma’am, won’t you sing that first song again?” It was William, and how could I refuse him? Although he must have been a good few years older than me, I still thought of him as a boy, something about his demeanor made it impossible not to. I smiled at him.

“Only if you sing along as well as last time!” I shouted back, and he nodded excitedly, with several others agreeing. 

“Sorry, Captain, it seems we may have a new favourite song,” I said with feigned sympathy, and he couldn’t quite hide his amusement behind his stoic facade. I was relieved to leave them and the apparently ongoing chess game behind, going to sit again on the now diminished pile of crates. 

After taking a break once more than half the crates had been hauled aboard the Nautilus, the work then continued, to finally conclude in the early afternoon. I saw my friends returning from their excursion, and went to greet them. I tried not to feel jealous of missing out on what Pierre described as an interesting day, wanting to stay resolute in that if I was to be part of the crew, I couldn’t pick and choose when it suited me, despite Captain Nemo giving me the option. 

“Oh, and Ned found a bee hive, and managed to collect the honey!” said the professor.

“Did he? What do you plan to do with this treasure, mr. Land?” I asked kindly, trying to mend our still strained relationship, and he rubbed his neck while looking down at the ground.

“Thought I’d make a cake with the breadfruit that’s left,” he said, shrugging.

“Ugh, that sounds amazing!” I exclaimed enthusiastically, and he gave me a small smile. 

“I hope it will be, your highness,” he mumbled, and I smiled wide at him, hoping we might soon be back to normal.

Chapter Text

Ned wasted no time in creating this masterpiece, and served it to the three of us that same afternoon. We were all sitting in his and Conseil’s cabin, having quite a cosy time really, but I suspected it was because Ned didn’t want to share it with anyone else onboard. I wondered if he’d managed to make friends with Adham in the kitchen, since he’d been there on quite a few occasions at this point, but somehow doubted it. I had taken it upon myself to get us tea from the mess hall to go with the cake, which meant we ended up having a proper tea party, sat on the opposite bunks of the small cabin. But what matters such trivial things, in the company of good friends? We all agreed the cake was truly excellent, and considering the normal lack of such delicacies onboard, I ventured so far as to say it was the best I’d ever had. Ned beamed with pride, and insisted I have another large slice. Once we were all quite finished with the cake, but not with each other’s company, we sat together in lively conversation. After a little while, Ned got out the guitar, and sang us a shanty with frisky lyrics, and I put my hands over Conseil’s ears with a shocked expression, making everyone laugh until we almost cried.

“He may not be ready for that song yet, but I’ve been teaching Conseil to play, and he’s not doing half bad,” said Ned Land once we had calmed down a little. He handed the guitar over to the younger man, who accepted it without protest, true to his nature. I then had the privilege of being the audience for once, listening as my three friends sang a French song they all seemed to know well.

Au clair de la lune,

Mon ami Pierrot,

Prête-moi ta plume

Pour écrire un mot.

Ma chandelle est morte,

Je n'ai plus de feu.

Ouvre-moi ta porte

Pour l'amour de Dieu.

Conseil played it well, I thought, and I clapped with great fervor once they finished, declaring they should start a band. Ned thought it was a great idea, ‘as soon as they were free from this hunk of iron’, Conseil gracefully accepted my compliment, and Pierre waved me off saying he was tone-deaf at best. I asked Conseil in my abysmal French if he’d learnt any other songs so far, and he began to play another simple melody, but this one I recognised. The others sang it in French, but I knew it in Swedish. 

Frère Jacques, Frère Jacques,                               Broder Jakob, Broder Jakob

Dormez-vous ? Dormez-vous ?                            Sover du? Sover du?

Sonnez les matines ! Sonnez les matines !            Hör du inte klockan? Hör du inte klockan?

Din, din, don. Din, din, don.                                Ding ding dong, ding ding dong.

We all laughed heartily as we finished, it was only a nursery rhyme after all, but they thought it was fascinating that we sang the song in Sweden as well. I didn’t know if we did in 1868, but omitted this slight detail. We were having such a pleasant afternoon together, that I completely forgot the time, and was only reminded of it when Ned and Conseil’s dinner was delivered. I’d never spoken to their steward, I didn’t think he knew English, but he nodded politely to me. Pierre and I realised we should have our dinners as well, and so we all soon parted ways, thanking Ned for sharing his excellent cake with us. I was so grateful that there seemed to be no irreparable damage done to our friendships after the last week’s tumultuous events, and went away with a warm feeling in my chest.

As I headed downstairs to the mess hall, I realised the Nautilus still wasn’t moving. Were we staying in our ‘port’ overnight perhaps? I approached the door, and heard loud voices coming from within. It didn’t sound like the normal jeering of a busy dinnertime, and I carefully opened it. As soon as I did, the voices quieted, and I watched as the whole crew turned their heads to me. I stopped, and blinked in confusion. I believe every single crewmember was there, including Kumar and Captain Nemo, who were stood by the door, facing the seated men. Every face in the room seemed to have an expression of either anger, sadness or stoic resignation. 

“Miss Larsson, your dinner will be taken to your cabin, if you would kindly leave us,” said the Captain, his voice emotionless. I turned to him and Kumar, who looked unusually displeased, and I wondered what on Earth could have happened. I wasn’t stupid enough to question any of it at this moment.

“Thank you, Captain, there’s no rush,” I mumbled, and left the room in a hurry. 

Back in my cabin, I paced back and forth, unable to shake the enormous anxiety threatening to overwhelm me. What could have possibly changed so drastically in the few hours since we had all been singing together on the embankment? Some kind of disagreement had arisen, but from what? My anxiety told me I had to be the cause of it, but my higher self refuted this self-centered notion. No, a turning point in the mission had been reached, I felt sure of it, and I was desperate to find out the details. The fact that it may be years before I did made my whole body jitter with nervosity. I wished to be able to travel through time again, to when I was no longer in this strange veil between ‘in’ and ‘out’. An hour or longer must have passed, I cannot say for certain. I was about to leave my room to go light a cigar, down a drink, and find Professor Aronnax, anything to help me take my mind off these musings, when my door opened. 

“Oskar! Vad har hänt?” (“What has happened?”) I blurted out before I could stop myself. He sighed, and placed the tray down, before putting a hand on my shoulder. The gesture stunned me for a moment, but he did not reply, he simply left in silence. I stared after him, then at the dinner he had left, and sank down onto my chair. I poked at the food, then was hit by the thought that it may contain the same sedative that had been used before. I blinked at it, then wolfed it down as fast as I could. I laid on my bed and waited for the sedative to take effect, for I could think of nothing more appealing than unconsciousness at the moment, but nothing seemed to be happening. After half an hour, I sat up with a deep sigh. ‘Fine, back to plan A’, I thought, and headed for the library. As I walked through the dining room towards the shut door, I heard, for the second time that day, loud voices on the other side of it. I felt the knot forming in my stomach, the sense of imminent doom making me sweat in cold fear. Something was definitely happening. I did not dare put my ear to the door, but could tell from where I was stood that the people in the room were not speaking any language I understood. However, it was not Nautilese, I was certain of it. There seemed to be only two voices arguing, and it wasn’t long before I had come to the absolute conclusion that they belonged to Kumar and Captain Nemo. I wasn’t so much listening as waiting for them to be done, so that I could go through, knowing they would not share any of their troubles with me regardless. However, I could not help but stop my breathing as one familiar word rang through the unknown ones. ‘Eleonora’. I felt myself dizzying. Somehow my anxiety had been correct. It was me they were arguing about. Somehow, it had all been my fault, whatever had happened. I stumbled backwards until I hit the table, grasping for a chair to sit down on. I could not find one, and sank down onto the floor. I was sat there, cradling myself, while the angry voices continued in the next room, my shallow breathing unable to drown them out, and my vision tunneling. Whatever I did, was always the wrong thing. The only thing I exceeded at in life at was making things worse, without ever meaning to. I hugged myself tightly, my nails digging into my arms through the shirt sleeves, trying to hold myself together as the tears started silently streaming down my face. I could only wait for the anxiety attack to abate, frozen in place, unable to help myself at this point. From somewhere far, far away, I heard a door opening, and my name being called, but I was once again the fox trapped in the snare, my only wish in the world to escape through whatever means necessary. But what was happening? A warm embrace, a hand gently caressing my hair, and I was able to close my eyes and take a deep breath. I heard Kumar’s voice, hard and cold as ice, say something from the other side of the room, before his footsteps disappeared and a door slammed shut. Someone was speaking to me, the other voice from the room, but he sounded worried now, all anger was gone. I opened my eyes, and looked up to see Captain Nemo on his knees, watching me, his face anguished. I stared at him, trying to take in the words he was saying, but they were as unintelligible as before. When I did not reply, he pulled me close and held me tightly. The minutes went by, and little by little I regained my consciousness, my heart slowing down, my breathing deepening. I blinked slowly, but before I broke this gentle moment, outside of time and convention, I made sure to take in every feel of it. His strong arms holding me against his chest, the steady heartbeat reverberating through me, the comforting scent of him, and his warmth radiating through me. Just one more moment of this complete bliss, before it all shattered. With a deep sigh, and a feel of breaking my own heart, I withdrew. He did not stop me, but I could feel him looking at me imploringly. I could not meet his eyes, scared of whatever disappointment or anger I would see there. Instead, I squeezed mine shut. 

“Eleonora…” His voice was gentle, questioning, not admonishing. I still refused to look at him. 

“What has happened, Captain?” I asked, my voice quiet and strained, but not wavering. He said nothing, and finally I had to look up. His expression was a storm of emotions, the anger and disappointment there, but also intense worry, and above all still the anguish. 

“What has happened? I know I must have done something, but I cannot understand what, or when, that would have caused-” 

“What has happened has nothing to do with you, Eleonora. Is that what you think? Is that why you are here in such a panic that you can barely take a breath?” he asked, his voice pained and tired, but earnest. I stared at him. Why would he try to spare my feelings in this way, when the truth would come out sooner or later regardless? I shook my head.

“I heard you. You said my name,” I stated, refusing to be persuaded of anything less than my complete guilt. He sighed, and sat down on the floor beside me. 

“That had nothing to do with what we were discussing in the mess hall, I assure you. God Almighty, what could you even have possibly done to cause such a reaction?” he asked, and somewhere deep down, I knew he was right, but could not quite admit so yet. 

“I don’t know! It’s all I seem to do, no matter what! I know I’m at fault somehow.” My voice was nothing but a whisper at the end. Captain Nemo sighed again.

“It must be a dreadful thing, feeling responsible for every thing to ever go wrong,” he said, and something in his voice made me think he was by no means alien to this feeling, no matter how hard it was to imagine the ever confident Captain anything but that. I said nothing.

“It defies all logic, yet is a truth more absolute than any verifiable fact on this Earth, am I correct?” My face softened. He did know. He understood. I nodded, looking at him in wonder. He pulled the corner of his mouth into a grim smile, and nodded as well. 

“Then there is nothing to do but once again assure you that this is not the case. You have done nothing wrong. What we were discussing has been long in the making, since before you came aboard. Do you understand?” he said, making sure I was hearing him, and taking in every word. I nodded again. 

“Good. I know it is no simple thing, but will you try to keep this in mind if you should ever feel such an overwhelming sense of desolation over your own actions again?” I only nodded, and now he smiled properly.

“My God, I don’t believe you’ve ever been so quiet and compliant before, so long as I’ve known you. Between that and your fainting the other day, I worry you’re in true danger of becoming quite ladylike,” he joked gently, and I gave a little laugh. 

“Would you prefer that, Captain?” I said weakly, and he smiled wide. 

“Oh no. I like you as you are, which is why you’re worrying me,” he said, and I felt my heartbeat quickening again. I did not mean to say it out loud, but the words slipped out all the same.

“You do?” His smile grew softer.

“I would not have let you join the crew if I did not,” he said, and his voice was serious. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes again.

“And they are still not opposed to it?” I asked, insecurity threatening to overwhelm me again, despite the Captain’s kind words. 

“By no means. We are all more than glad to welcome you. I wasn’t being sarcastic earlier, when I said I don’t know how we ever managed without you,” he said in a warm tone, and his face lit up in that fond smile in whose presence I never knew what to do with myself. I hugged my knees tightly and had to look away from him. 

“So what were you… ‘discussing’ with Kumar, when you said my name?” He did not answer for a moment, but then said in a once again serious tone;

“You weren’t meant to hear that.” I shot him a glance.

“And I didn’t mean to. I was going to find Pierre,” I said, and a shadow passed over his face.

“I’m not asking what you talked of in the mess hall, but here in the library. Surely I must be allowed to know of a matter concerning me?” I implored. He sighed deeply, and held my gaze with such intensity it felt as though it would bore right through my mind. 

“Do you still trust me, Eleonora?” I was too enraptured with his dark eyes to do anything but tell the truth, I might as well have been hypnotised.

“Always,” I whispered, and his eyes softened. He put his hand on my shoulder without breaking the intense eye contact. 

“Then trust that I will tell you everything, the very moment I am able to,” he said, and arose in one swift motion. He held out his hand for me, and I took it without quite understanding what had happened. I got to my feet, not quite with the same grace as the Captain, I’m sad to say, despite his help. 

“If you are feeling better, I am needed to chart our heading, miss, please excuse me,” he said in that way, polite yet leaving no room for dispute, that led me to think he had been giving orders and expected them to be followed his whole life. I had regained my composure now that he was no longer gazing into my eyes, and felt quite annoyed by his misuse of this power, and the curt dismissal. I looked at him and gave a sarcastic curtsey, and thought I detected the ghost of a smile as he left me. 

I was sat in the library, finally smoking that cigar, attempting to make sense of what had happened. I’m not sure how well I managed. I went into the lounge, finding it empty, and the panels shut so I could find no distraction there either. I knew there was no hope of sleep while my thoughts and fears welled over me like tidal waves. I found myself with a drink in hand before long, contemplating what I could do. Who could I speak to of these things? No one, really, without laying down every secret I had fought so hard to keep these past months. I did not know how much longer I would be able to continue on like this though. No matter his reaction, it would be a relief when I could finally tell Captain Nemo the truth of my existence. The only issue was that I was convinced this could only happen when he decided to do the same for me. For now, I felt I needed the leverage. I was well aware that he knew there were many things I wasn’t telling him, and his innate need for knowledge must make this a constant source of frustration. I had agreed to the terms of joining the crew by the device of ‘quid pro quo’. On a day of his choosing, we would share all there was to know of one another, and to me, the day could not come soon enough.

Chapter Text

When I awoke after a fitful, restless sleep, it was February 22nd, and the Nautilus was moving yet again. The steady humming of the propeller was strangely soothing, a constant reminder of the fact that we were moving along, to always be afforded new sights of fishes, birds, cetaceans, corals and algae. I tried to put the unusual events of the day before out of my head, but dreaded going to the mess hall if I was to find the mood as upset as last night. I walked there slowly, dragging my feet, and listened intently for any sounds of a quarrel. I heard none, but as I was heading down the corridor with the mess hall door at the end, it opened. A few men came out, none of them my close friends, but they nodded kindly and all seemed in high spirits, in lively conversation with one another. I nodded back and gave them an awkward smile as they passed me, but I felt relieved to have witnessed this promising indication of a change from yesterday’s tension. As I stepped into the room, there was nothing that suggested the atmosphere in it had ever been anything but pleasant. It was busy and loud, filled with the normal sounds of friendly chatter over a good meal, and I breathed out. Whatever the disagreement had been about, they must have come to some understanding in the end. I hoped the same was true for Kumar and the Captain, but they way they had parted yesterday wasn’t promising. Since there was nothing I could do about it, neither of them present, I resolved to enjoy the company of my friends from the crew, and went to join them as soon as I’d helped myself to the breakfast buffet. They welcomed me heartily, and we all kept to the silent agreement of not mentioning what I’d witnessed during my short visit in here the previous day. As we were bantering together as normal, Jakub said something to one of the English-speakers, who translated for me.

“Jakub says he’s very sore from yesterday, from carrying such a heavy load,” he said in badly concealed amusement. The others were trying their best not to laugh.  

“Oh dear, I’m so sorry to hear that. Do you want me to give you a massage?” I asked in sarcastic sympathy, which was hastily translated for the giant man. He grinned, and nodded in agreement. I got up behind him, and despite sitting down he was almost the same height as me. I put as much weight as I could behind my elbow, and pressed it into his trapezius muscle. He flinched, and swore in what I think must have been Polish. The rest of the table were howling with laughter, and as he turned around with a frown I grinned at him.

“Don’t take on more than you can handle,” I told him unapologetically, and he waved me off with a shake of his head, but couldn’t help smiling. I’d never had any siblings, but imagined this must be what it was like to have older brothers. 

Later in the lounge, Pierre took over the duties of distracted me from any unpleasant thoughts of the previous day by telling me about this odd part of the Atlantic we were currently cruising, the Sargasso Sea. I was, not for the first time, surprised by the amount of knowledge about the world available in this year. When I first boarded the Nautilus, I was of the conceited view that my knowledge of the world would be far more extensive than that of anyone else onboard. Although there were some matters in which I had the advantage, both Pierre and Captain Nemo were far more intelligent and more educated than I could ever hope to be. They were both able to recite facts, exact dates and measurements from memory, and despite the fact that I had in my time been considered to have extensive general knowledge of the world, they constantly left me miles behind in any scientific discussion. Still, I think I was considered extremely well educated for a woman of the 1860’s, and they were often pleasantly surprised when I was able to add something of value to the conversation. However, their company had definitely humbled me, and I feared I would accidentally betray some knowledge simply impossible to possess at this time, in my eagerness to impress them. Today, however, my knowledge of our conversation topic could all be easily explained. Pierre pointed out a cluster of barrel jellyfish, which Conseil kindly classified for us. They were giant, and gorgeous, and I stared out the window in elation. 

“To think, all my childhood I so wished to see one of them, after my father told me of them and said they sometimes venture as far as the Swedish west coast,” I said with a wondrous smile. Pierre sat down next to me, and watched me with a fond smile.

“And so, mademoiselle, you now get your wish!” 

“Indeed, but I have actually been fortunate enough to see one once before, although nowhere near as big as these.” Pierre raised his eyebrows.

“Ah bon? You managed to see one at your summer island?” I had of course told him all about my dear island, and explained that that’s where the majority of my experience of the sea and its inhabitants came from. He’d been ecstatic to hear of my genuine interest in marine biology, and would sometimes ask me about the marine life of Skagerrak and Kattegatt, of which he himself had no real life experience. I hoped what I told him did not differ too much from what it was in their time, since my expertise was… what’s the opposite of ‘out-dated’? 

“No, unfortunately, but I did get quite intimately acquainted with one while swimming in Nice on holiday! I was lucky they do not sting!” I answered him. He opened his mouth, but before he could say anything I added;

“Wait, sorry, no. This was in Viareggio, not Nice.” Pierre stared at me for a moment, looking quite astonished.

“You holidayed in both France and Italy, mademoiselle? Mon Dieu, a professor’s salary must be a good deal more generous in Uppsala than in Paris,” he said, with a small awkward chuckle. I flustered a little while trying to think of how to explain this.

“Oh, not at all, I’m sure. Forgive me, it was a holiday for me, but my father was travelling for his work,” I hastened to say, hoping this sounded acceptable. He seemed to contemplate this.

“And you still hold to the claim that your mother is not from a high-borne family? It would explain a great deal, chérie. You’re well-travelled, well-educated, well-spoken…” he implored, and I had to laugh. Middle-class really did mean something different in modern times than in the 19th century.  

“I assure you, sir, it is not the case. Although, one of my father’s relatives was knighted… a few years ago!” I said, surprising myself when this realisation hit me. It was true, a distant ancestor of my father was knighted in 1865, although the title had died with his daughter. When I was christened, I had been given my father’s last name, shared by that knighted ancestor, but I had changed it to my mother’s one when I broke contact with him. 

“Aha, I knew it!” came Ned Land’s voice, who had apparently been listening. He got up, and made a dramatic bow all the way down to the floor.

“Your highness,” he said in mock reverence, and I laughed out loud. 

“A distant relative, mr. Land,” I told him sternly. 

“I don’t buy it. This island you keep talking about, where you ‘summer’... I’m with the professor, you’re not common riffraff,” he said with suspicion. 

“My relatives who live on the island work as marine pilots, Ned, and we sleep six in the same room when I ‘summer’ there,” I said, rolling my eyes at him exaggerating my words. He eyed me suspiciously. 

“An honorable profession, mademoiselle,” Pierre put in. 

“As is being a professor, no?” I said, giving him a meaning glance. He laughed.

“Most honorable, chérie.”

“Yeah, I’m sure your father would have approved more of a professor than a harpooner,” said Ned begrudgingly. I went to give him a tired look, but he was grinning. Clearly he didn’t harbour any hard feelings over me ‘choosing’ Pierre over him, as he thought was the case. 

“I wish the Nautilus would sail north in the Atlantic as well-” I started saying, trying to change the subject.

“Me too!” interjected Ned, and me and Pierre shot him a glare at his rude interruption, but he was still only grinning.

“... so that we could see some even bigger jellyfish. The Lion’s mane can grow to over two meters across the bell, and its tentacles reach over thirty meters! I’ve seen some massive ones crossing the sea to Denmark, and England, but I imagine further out we could see the truly giant ones!” I exclaimed excitedly. 

“You mean the Cyanea capillata, mademoiselle?” asked Pierre. 

“Oh… I’m not sure, mon ami, I don’t know their Latin name, I’m afraid,” I said, furrowing my brows. We got out his book from the library, and he folded through the pages with an expertise only enjoyed by their author, and pointed to a drawing. 

“Celui-ci?”

“Yes, exactly! Lion’s mane jellyfish in English, Brännmanet in Swedish. It just means stinging jellyfish, the only one of its kind in our waters,” I explained. 

“And Cyanea capillata in Latin…” I stated to myself, trying to remember the name. 

“Genre: Cyanea. Famille: Cyaneidae. Ordre: Semaeostomeae…” Conseil started classifying, true to form, as he leaned over our shoulders.

“Ah, oui, the true giants of the sea. Alors, in 1865, one specimen outside of Massachusetts in America set the record at 210 centimeters across, with tentacles reaching over 36 meters!” said Pierre, with his perpetual enthusiasm over any marine animal. In this instance, I did share it fully, and said in equal enthusiasm;

“Indeed, and I believe that record still stands to this day!” He only laughed.

“Mais oui, I would not be surprised if it stands for a long time.” I realised that of course, the record had only been set three years ago. He had no idea how right he was, since I’d meant it still held in my day. 

“Horrible creatures. Nasty stingers,” sneered Ned Land, with a glance to the page. 

“Right you are, Ned. They’re my old arch-nemeses, in fact. In early summer, they’re so, so tiny, with barely any colour to them, but the tentacles can still reach up to ten meters! The larger ones are dark red, and easy to spot, and have usually lost their long tentacles in the shallow waters by then, but the little ones…” I said, shuddering at the memories. 

“I’ve learnt to keep a keen eye out for them whenever I’m wading, let me tell you that much,” I said with great emphasis. 

“You don’t ever go swimming?” asked Ned, trying to hide his amusement.

“Oh yes, but it’s usually too cold early in the summer. You should know that, you’re from Canada!” I admonished him, but he only smiled. 

“Have you ever encountered their blue counterpart, mademoiselle?” asked Pierre, getting back to the subject at hand.

“Often, sir. For some reason though, they’re never quite as big…” I said thoughtfully.

“They’re probably just cold,” said Ned with a laugh.

“Ned!” exclaimed Pierre indignantly.

“Enough out off you,” I said, waving him off, but couldn’t help but laugh as well. He held up his hands in a disarming gesture, and went to sit down, still laughing. 

“They’re both so beautiful, Pierre. But they’re always on their own. The moon jellyfish, on the other hand, would sometimes show up in such numbers that whole rivers of them would form, floating past the island with the stream. I’m glad it’s not the other way around!” I said, knowing he never tired of hearing my accounts from the Swedish west coast. He flipped a couple pages over, and pointed to another picture.

“This is them, non?” he asked. I nodded, and Conseil went ahead and classified them for us as well. We’d seen large swarms of them on numerous occasions, but I never tired of watching the alien creatures swimming serenely outside our windows. For a time, they’d had an aquarium of them at the science centre in Gothenburg, and I could stand and watch them for ages. Seeing them free, in the vast expanse of the ocean, was a thousand times better. 

After dinner, I went back to the lounge, hoping the barrel jellyfish would still be there, but the panels were now closed. My friends had all retired, it seemed, or were still having their dinner. I picked up a book from the library instead, and, not for the first time, thanked my lucky star that either Captain Nemo or someone else onboard was a fan of Jane Austen. I kicked off my boots, and was happy to curl up on a sofa with my favourite author. After half an hour or so, I was interrupted when Ned Land stepped into the room. 

“Evening,” I greeted him. 

“Your highness,” he said in response, and I rolled my eyes before resuming my reading.

“So, you and the professor, huh?” he said, sinking down onto the sofa by my feet.

“Apparently so,” I said, still treading the fine line of never confirming anything to a hundred percent certainty in the matter. 

“Well, like I said, I’m happy for you. I’d much rather it was him than… Anyway, I never suspected Aronnax to be the type,” he said incredulously. 

“My type?” I asked, looking up from the book, and trying to hold back a smile. Ned was squirming a little.

“No, ma’am, the other way around,” he said, dancing around the subject.

“Oh, I see! You didn’t think I was good enough for him, but would kindly lower your own standards enough to have me?” I berated him, having a bit too much fun at how uncomfortable he was. He gave me a reproachful look.

“I think you know that’s not what I meant.” 

“Oh? So what did you mean?” I implored him mercilessly. 

“Now, see, it’s not really an appropriate topic to discuss with a lady,” he said, trying to act dignified. I grinned at him. 

“I thought we’d agreed I wasn’t a lady.” Ned only shook his head. 

“Maybe that explains why you would be the professor’s type,” he mumbled, and I couldn’t stop myself any longer, laughing out loud. He turned to look at me, stunned.

“I’m sorry for tormenting you, Ned. I know what you meant,” I smiled, and reached over, giving his arm a squeeze.

“You sure you do?” he asked, sounding quite condescending.

“What, you think I’m unaware that some men prefer other men to the company of ladies? I don’t have to be a sailor to know that,” I said, grinning smugly. He stared at me.

“Well, in case of sailors it’s more an issue of availability than preferance…” he said, clearing his throat. 

“Oh, you have personal experience on the matter?” I teased, and he turned bright red, making me laugh even harder. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t judge. So?” I continued, nudging him with my foot. He would learn not to underestimate me. He pushed it away. 

“That’s none of your business,” Ned gruffed.

“I know it’s not. I’m being nosey,” I said, smiling wide. He shook his head with a frown. 

“You’re a menace.”

“Thank you, I do try,” I smiled, and he couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Go get your guitar, Ned. You promised you’d play me Old Dan Tucker weeks ago.” I then said, finally quitting my torture of the poor man.

“As you please, your highness,” he said, grabbing my foot and giving it a playful shake. 

After another successful sing-along, although perhaps slightly less rowdy than last time, we were sitting together again, laughing at some crude joke or other. 

“See, I think you’d have had a lot of fun being married to me, El,” he suddenly said, with a sad smile. My face dropped.

“Ned-” I began in a sympathetic tone, but he stopped me with a gesture.

“No, I know, I know, you made a good choice. The professor never… never would have said any of those things about you,” he said, his voice breaking. I stared at him. Did he really feel that bad about what he’d said? We’d both been upset though, and I deeply regretted the consequences it had had for him.

“Well… it’s certainly the worst proposal I’ve heard of… including mr. Darcy’s one,” I attempted in a joking tone, gesturing to my book. He huffed a little, but still seemed morose. I scooted closer, and put a hand on his shoulder.

“Ned, I was deeply touched by your offer, it was most considerate of you to make it. I will always be grateful to you,” I said sincerely, and he turned to look at me.

“Would your answer have been different if I hadn’t…” he tried to ask, and I took pity on him.

“If you hadn’t called me a whore? Not at all, all my closest friends have called me a whore at some point. It’s a rite of passage,” I said with a half-smile, and he laughed a little. 

“Now, I think maybe you need to look over who you consider your friends. That’s simply unacceptable,” he said, raising his eyebrows.

“If I were to do that, I think you’d still be far ahead, since no one else has had to spend forty-eight hours in solitary confinement for their crimes against me,” I said jokingly, but my eyes were apologetic, and I think he understood my meaning. 

“Don’t worry about it, your highness, I’ve been punished worse for less,” he said, giving my knee a reassuring squeeze, but his words made my heart sink. He saw my face drop, and continued;

“Besides, it wasn’t your idea to put me there, was it? But no matter, the Captain only temporarily made my prison cell smaller than it normally is.” These words did not comfort me one bit either.

“I’m so sorry, Ned,” I said, my voice but a whisper. I was sorry, not just for what he’d endured, but for all he still had to endure, before he could make his escape. It was his turn to give a little half-smile now.

“I never blamed you, and if you want to put the whole thing behind us, I’d be more than happy to,” he said warmly. I looked into his eyes, and nodded. His smile widened, and he pulled me in close, placing a kiss in my hair. 

“Good. I’d hate to lose my only acquaintance from the nobility,” he said, and I finally laughed. Pulling back, I told him smiling;

“I believe you’re my only royal acquaintance, so the feeling is mutual, mr. King of harpooners.” This made him chuckle.

“Oh, I wouldn’t be so sure. You don’t think old Nemo has some royal blood, the way he gives orders and all?” he asked, which gave me pause. 

“I wouldn’t be too surprised if you were right, Ned,” I said after a moment, my voice serious again. 

Chapter Text

We continued sailing through the Atlantic, going ever south, south, south. Each day was spent in the same way, breakfast with the crew, greeting Kumar up on the platform, watching the tranquil life pass by outside the lounge window with Pierre, Ned and Conseil, before dining again with the crew. It was a pleasant existence, fulfilling in both experiences and companionship. Sometimes, Ned would bring his guitar to the lounge, and we would sing. At other times, when the panels were shut, I would sit in the library and work my way through the seemingly endless supply of classic literature. I left the books on science mostly to Pierre. When we saw the Captain, he was civil, and courteous, but rarely more than that. I ached to feel his embrace again, his warmth radiate through me, but it seemed these moments were exclusively reserved for times of great upset on either part. And why would the case be any different? He did not harbour any feelings to mimic my own ones, or evidently Pierre’s, since we were treated the same. Our agreement had been seemingly successful, hopefully Captain Nemo would never be any the wiser of our mutual feelings for him, and we had not even had to change our behaviour in the slightest to achieve this success. I had stayed true to my resolution, and we had not spent another night together since the Bay of Vigo. My arising feelings towards him had abated, as I’d hoped, although I still sometimes caught myself watching him with such admiration I worried they were not far from the surface. One day, as we were flipping through his book together, so that I might add whatever knowledge I could from Scandinavian waters, a page caught my attention. It was a picture he’d drawn, faithful and true as always, of my dear friend - the common shore crab. It was native to the French Atlantic coast as well, so his perfect rendition was nothing surprising, but what I noticed was its Latin name, Carcinus maenas. I asked him what it meant, a growing suspicion in my mind, and he confirmed it. Indeed, it was named for the Maenads, these ancient Greek worshippers of Bacchus, and I laughed out loud. Pierre could of course not understand the irony of this, that the little critters I’d known so well all my life would share the epithet I’d given myself onboard the Nautilus. Under the guise of it simply reminding me of home, I asked him if he would not draw me a copy of the picture from the book, that I may hang in my cabin. I made sure he put its name down as well. As I was hanging it up on my wall, I shook my head with a smile. I hoped it might work as the opposite of a motivational poster, and I would be able to reign myself in better in the future. I was to be afforded a chance to try my strength of will sooner than I expected. 

That very evening, I was again alone in the salon, reading another book. I was wearing my dress, thinking it may be the last chance before the weather got too cold, if we were to continue much further south. Soon, I would need more than the byssus jacket provided for the daily stroll on the platform. I’d helped myself to a nightcap, and was enjoying the taste of the sweet liquor, and the warming sensation of swallowing it. Suddenly, my reading was interrupted as the lights went out in the lounge, but this was soon explained as the panels slid open. The moonlight filtering in through the water was not quite sufficient for reading, without straining my eyes, so I abandoned the book for the view of the window. I laid down on my perch, and watched the serene sea passing by. I absent-mindedly started singing, a slow melody, beautiful and sensual. 

Bacchus, käre broder, vakna

Se hur nymfer bada nakna

Uti en vik

Allt under skoj och skrik

Min vän, hör opp

Låt kärlek ha sitt lopp

Bacchus vaknar nog med tiden

Nymfer kommer och stör friden

Med ljuv musik…

My hand was swaying to the music, along with the waves, and my head was blissfully free of thoughts as I finished the song. I was at peace, alone with the ocean, or so I thought. 

“I’ve not heard that one before,” said a deep voice from within the room. I felt my heartbeat quicken, but didn’t turn to him.

“Perhaps you weren’t meant to,” I said, my voice more evocative than I’d meant it to be. I heard him step closer, and saw Captain Nemo come into view. As he leaned his shoulder against the window, arms crossed, I could no longer avoid meeting his eyes. They were glinting dangerously, and I gave him a small smile, trying to ignore the way his look made me feel. 

“No? Pray tell, why not?” he asked, in a low, almost suggestive way. My smile faded somewhat, but I felt unusually brave, still holding on to some of the serenity that had filled me a moment ago. 

“Did you not hear what it’s about?” I asked with raised eyebrows, attempting a teasing tone. 

“I don’t speak Swedish,” he said, looking at me intently. 

“Just every other language on the planet?” I smiled. I ignored my beating heart, this came dangerously close to flirting, but something about the darkness, the drink, and the late night made me unable to stop. What harm could it do? He would not think anything of it, I was completely devoted to Pierre as far as he was concerned. Harmless teasing, was all he would take it for. At least, that’s what I choose to tell myself, all memories of the Carcinus maenas conveniently forgotten. 

“Not quite, miss, yet. Perhaps you will teach me Swedish at some point, so that I may add it to the list?” he asked, a small smile mimicking my own playing on his lips. 

“And give up the one advantage I have over you, sir? I shouldn’t think so,” I said, my smile widening. He scoffed at me.

“The one advantage? By no means, Eleonora.” My smile faltered, and normally, I would have found myself in waters too deep by now, but I hadn’t quite lost all composure yet.

“When would I do that, Captain? You are so busy, I barely see you,” I said, and the statement came out more as earnest longing, rather than the sarcasm I had intended. His smile turned fond, but there was a tinge of sadness in his expression. 

“I’m hoping to be able to amend this before too long. For now, could you not start by telling me what you were singing?” he asked, and how was I to turn down his request, when he was looking at me like that, the gleaming moonlight through the water playing over his beautiful features. 

“I’m sure you don’t need to know the language to have caught a name or two?” I tried, evading the question as I could already feel myself blushing. 

“You’re right, which makes it all the more intriguing,” he said, sitting down by the foot of the chaise lounge, without breaking our eye contact. I felt my composure waver now, his gaze and presence almost overwhelming in such close proximity. 

“Were you invoking a prayer to Bacchus, little maenad?” His voice was low, prowling, imploring, and my breathing grew shaky. 

“Have you finally settled on maenad, Captain?” I whispered, drawing my legs up to be given some space from him, but he only leaned in closer. I thought my heart would explode, its palpitations that of prey in the face of a predator. 

“The sea nymphs are in the song too, do I no longer deserve that description?” I asked breathlessly, too nervous to stay silent. 

“So is Venus, unless I’m mistaken. Would you prefer that epithet?” he asked, his gaze boring into mine. I felt dizzy, could scarce believe what I was hearing, but I was unable to look away from his dark eyes. They were once again pulling me in, hypnotising me. 

“I would, but I do not deserve it,” I breathed, surprising myself at being able to form a coherent sentence.

“No? Venus Anadyomene, risen from the sea,” he smiled, and finally tore away his gaze for a moment, letting me draw in a shaky breath. Captain Nemo arose, and I thought he would leave me in a daze, as so many times before, but instead he reached out his hand for me. I blinked at him for a second, before taking it in disbelief. He pulled me up slowly, but did not let go, instead putting his other hand on my back. 

“Will you sing it again?” he asked in a quiet voice, looking into my eyes imploringly. I was transfixed, this must be a dream, surely? I put my hand on his chest, trying to stop it from shaking, and casting my eyes down, I began singing. My voice was barely a whisper, and wavered a little at first, but as we started swaying in little motions, I felt myself calming. We were so close he must have heard my heart beating, as I heard his, and I must have imagined it, but thought for a moment that it too was beating faster than normal. I dared not look up at his face again, but stared straight ahead. His hand pressed my back gently, and I stepped even closer. I could feel the heat from his body, felt his comforting, intoxicating scent, and deciding it was indeed a dream like many I’d had before, put my head to his chest. I watched our intertwined hands, and sang on in complete bliss, hoping I would never wake up. The song was over all too soon, but he still did not let me go. We continued dancing in silence, to only the rhythm of our breaths and heartbeats, for I don’t know how long. I’d closed my eyes, trying to remember every little detail of this perfect moment in time, before it was over. Then and there, however, it felt endless. I loved him. I would love him no matter what, as long as I lived, in this time or any other. He was the reason I had been brought here, and I would never regret it for even a second. I loved him, as I had never loved anyone before. 

It would not have mattered how long we had stayed there, for it would never have been long enough for me, but eventually, he stilled. I refused to move away from him, so was still holding his wrist as he put his hand to my cheek. Captain Nemo lifted my face gently to look at him, but said nothing. He only gazed into my eyes, and I no longer felt any nervosity to look back. He seemed to be studying me, trying to read my thoughts, and eventually gave a small smile. 

“Thank you, Eleonora,” he said, his voice filled with warmth and almost a fervor. I only looked back at him, into his beautiful eyes. I couldn’t understand why he was thanking me, but did not care in the moment. His expression turned determined, and he started leaning down to me, but then paused. Barely brushing my skin, he placed a kiss on my forehead, and I closed my eyes again. He was still looking at me when I opened them.

“It’s late. Come, you must be tired,” he said with a fond smile, and finally let go of our embrace. The cold where his arm had been sent a shiver through me, but I was still holding his hand as he led me back to my cabin. Stopping outside the door, we stood silent. He seemed to hesitate for a moment, but then smiled again.

“Good night, Eleonora.” I studied him, unable to read the expression in his eyes.

“Good night, Odysseus,” I then said, and his smile widened. With a final caress of my cheek, he left me with these simple words;

“Sleep well.”

Chapter Text

“Hold on, let me get this straight. ‘Ver’ is the only possessive pronoun, regardless of who the person possessing an object is? What about pro-form?” Sat in the mess hall after dinner, we were in the middle of a heated discussion on linguistics, specifically Nautilese grammar, as I struggled to understand this invented language. 

“No, not quite, Madam. It depends on if the ownership can be understood in the context of the sentence or not,” explained Kumar, as others in the group eagerly tried to fill in their additions to my lesson. I put my head in my hands, shaking it.

“This is impossible. I don’t know how I ever managed to even learn English,” I said, my voice muffled. The others laughed, and Kumar kindly patted me on the back.

“It will all fall into place eventually, priya. It’s an efficient language once you know it, our clever Captain made sure of that,” he said, and I looked up at him, my eyebrows raised.

“The Captain invented Nautilese?” I asked incredulously. I’d suspected it before, but had never had it confirmed.

“Of course he did, who else would come up with such an idea?” Kumar scoffed, and our friends around the table laughed. I did too, before Kumar asked me with a smirk;

“Does that make you like it a bit better, Madam?” I tried to stave off the inevitable blushing, but I’m unsure how successful I was, for his smile grew wider. 

“How can he invent a whole language, but then forget to name it?” I said in an irritated voice, trying to brush off his comment, but the others only jeered at my tone and red face. 

“In his great wisdom, he must have foreseen that someone else would come along to do so,” smiled Kumar. I frowned at his teasing, and tried to veer our conversation back to less embarrassing territory. 

“So how would you say that then, ‘The Captain invented Nautilese’?” I asked, my voice still a bit perturbed. 

“‘Kapitane rench Nautil’. Efficient, do you see?” said Kumar, but I frowned.

“Wait, ‘the Captain’ is just ‘Kapitane’? Then what does ‘Dakkar’ mean?” I asked, thinking back on the word Kumar had called him as I was being manhandled by Captain Nemo, that fateful day back in January. The table went silent, they all stared at me. My eyes widened.

“Oh… sorry! Is it a very bad word?” I asked through gritted teeth, with an apologetic grimace, thinking I’d offended them. They only continued staring at me, before one of the weathered sailors finally snorted.

“I suppose that depends on who you ask!” he said, and the table broke out into raucous laughter. They were quickly silenced by Kumar barking at them.

“Pay these imbeciles no mind, Madam. They are being keelhauled this afternoon!” he told me, giving them all a death glare. They seemed to have a hard time stifling their laughs, despite the threat. He arose, and left the mess hall in aggravation. I hurried after as he stepped into the corridor, looking back over my shoulder at the table, where the men were now almost crying from laughter. 

“I’m so sorry, Kumar. I shouldn’t have said anything, I didn’t realise they knew what had happened! I'm sorry for embarrassing you!” I said in a worried tone while trying to keep up with him, thinking this must mean Kumar had said something insulting to Captain Nemo that day. 

“Oh, trust me, Madam, I have already paid dearly for my mistake. I only thank my lucky star that you are sometimes an imbecile too, or the repercussions would have been worse!” he said angrily, while waving me off with an equally angry gesture. I paused for a moment, but then raced to catch up with him.

“Kumar… Kumar, stop!” I begged him, putting a hand on his arm. He finally did, with a deep sigh. His expression was still annoyed as he looked at me.

“I’m very sorry, I didn’t mean to cause you any trouble, surely you know that? I didn’t think the Captain would have taken the time to invent any curses for your language-” I started, trying to formulate some kind of apology for my blunder, but he interrupted me.

“He didn’t.” I silenced, blinking at him. 

“But then… what does it mean?” Kumar’s expressions softened a little, and he actually smiled.

“Like I said… I’m lucky you’re sometimes an imbecile too,” he stated, and patted my cheek. I stared at him, absolutely perplexed. He started walking off again, in a much happier manner than before, and I was left dumbstruck in place. 

As we continued our journey through the Atlantic, I would still only see Captain Nemo in passing, but not a minute went by that I did not think of him. I would get out the box with the necklace he’d given me for my birthday, and sit on my bed as I watched it in quiet reverie. If I closed my eyes, I could still remember the sound of his heartbeat, as we danced slowly together, my head resting against his chest. I would be torn between feelings of euphoria, anguish, longing, and confusion. And also a faint, tiny glimmer of hope. I would quickly shut the box and put it back in the wardrobe when this foolish notion threatened to take hold of me, and overwhelm my sense of reality and logic. I had resigned myself to the fact that I would be allowed to live my life in his sunlight, without ever flying too close to it. He’d called me Venus, the goddess of love, and if I had been, I might have been worthy of him. But he’d only meant it as a joke. ‘Venus Anadyomene’, he’d said, since they’d rescued me from the sea. He’d meant it kindly, and I smiled a little, since he had no idea how true it was. I had indeed risen from the sea, after travelling a century and a half backwards in time, to find him. There was no longer any doubt in my mind. Whatever his mission in life was, I was supposed to play a part in it, and I only hoped I’d be allowed to do so soon.

Chapter Text

The next opportunity I would have for more than a quick interaction with Captain Nemo was given on the 13th of March. We had already passed the entire length of Africa, travelling through the middle of the giant expanse of the Atlantic, and were days since abreast of Patagonia. Before long, we would have passed the Falkland Islands and New Georgia. I was of Pierre’s opinion that we would then pass Cape Horn and continue back into the Pacific Ocean, where our circumnavigation had started. I wondered if the Captain would have us cruise past the Trinity Peninsula of Antarctica. I’d always found it poetic, that the land of ice stretched the furthest north to almost reach across the sea to the land of fire, Tierra del Fuego. We would come to see this land in time, but before that, many adventures awaited us. 

So, as I was saying, it was the 13th of March, and I was with Pierre in the lounge. He was telling me about these waters, where a Captain Denham had supposedly been unable to find bottom with a 14000 meter long sounding line. I scoffed at him.

“Pierre, I’m not sure what mistake they made, but no part of the ocean anywhere in the world reaches those depths, I assure you,” I stated with confidence. He was about to protest, when Captain Nemo came into the room. 

“Ah, Capitaine, is it not true these waters reach a depth of over fifteen kilometers?” he said, looking for some backup to his claim.

“Fifteen? You said fourteen a second ago!” I put in with a disbelieving laugh. Captain Nemo leant against the wall with crossed arms, an amused smile playing on his lips.

“Oui, mais… Pardonnez, mademoiselle, but later, Lieutenant Parker aboard the American frigate Congress was unable to reach the seafloor with a sounding line of almost 50000 feet! N’est-ce pas, Capitaine?” he exclaimed indignantly.

“Just because you have names and numbers doesn’t make it true, mon ami!” I sighed, before Captain Nemo had a chance to refute these preposterous claims. 

“C’est vrai, professor,” he said instead, to my great annoyance. Pierre looked smug, and I turned to the Captain with a frown.

“The deepest point of the Atlantic is a little less than 8,5 kilometers, outside of Puerto Rico. We’re not too far from the South Sandwich Trench, but that still reaches less than half the depth the professor is claiming!” I told him imploringly, wanting him to put an end to these ridiculous notions Pierre had put forward. He raised his eyebrows in surprise, while Pierre stared at me with a perplexed look on his face.

“Where do you get these names and numbers with such certainty, miss?” asked Captain Nemo. I looked between them, and realised I had no good answer. Like on a high school paper, I could hardly cite Wikipedia as my source. I crossed my arms as well, and pouted in irritation.

“Female intuition,” I mumbled angrily. They exchanged a glance with each other, before Captain Nemo went over to the instruments and controls on the wall. 

“What are you doing, Captain?” I asked, as both me and Pierre looked on in interest. 

“I should hate for such a trivial quarrel to come between you, my friends, so we best get to the bottom of it, quite literally,” he stated, and turned back to us with a smug smile. His statement must have had the desired effect, for he looked pleased to see our equally surprised faces. 

“We are going to dive to the seafloor, Capitaine?” asked Pierre in wonder. Captain Nemo came over to sit on an armchair opposite our sofa.

“Why not, professor?” he said serenely. 

“What’s the deepest you’ve ever taken the Nautilus, sir?” I asked, a lump of anxiety forming in my gut. 

“I believe we’ve dived to a depth of over two leagues on several occasions, miss,” he said, still with the same serenity. My eyes widened in disbelief.

“Two leagues!” exclaimed Pierre in excitement.

“But that can’t be…” I whispered, shaking my head. 

“And why is that, miss?” asked the Captain, tilting his head. 

“Even the Challenger deep doesn’t come down to two leagues…” I said quietly, more to myself than to either of my companions, but I was too disturbed by these claims to care if they heard. 

“What is the Challenger deep, mademoiselle?” Pierre asked with a frown. I blinked, realising I was in dangerous territory, so tried to wave him off with a gesture of my hand. I got up, and went over to the designated bar table. Pouring myself a drink, I downed it before turning around to both Pierre and the Captain watching me. I stopped, and stared back at them.

“Sorry, did anyone else want one?” I asked, feeling a bit dizzy from the recent implications. Was my world view about to be upended once again? I had to lean against the table for support.

“Non, merci,” said Pierre with a slightly worried look. Captain Nemo arose, and came over to me. 

“You needn’t worry, miss. The Nautilus will be in no danger, and neither will we,” he said, putting a reassuring hand on my shoulder. I nodded, my eyes wide, and realised he’d just given me another reason to worry. How on Earth would she be able to withstand the pressure, if Pierre was correct in his claims? Fifteen kilometers… Captain Nemo looked me over, before returning to the instrument panel. The lights went out, and the window panels opened. 

“We would not want to miss the chance to view these lower strata, now would we?” the Captain said, his question rhetorical, and I suspected his gesture was meant to ease my nervosity. I followed him to the instrument panel, checking the pressure gauge, and gulped. We had already reached a depth of half a kilometer. Captain Nemo put a hand on my back, the memory of when it was last there sending a shiver of pleasure down my spine, and he led me back to the sofa. I took my seat next to Pierre again, as the Captain took his in the armchair. 

“Will the ballast tanks be enough to reach the bottom, Capitaine?” asked Pierre, who seemed only excited at the prospect of us being crushed like a beer can at a frat party. 

“Oh, no, sir, we are using only the slanted fins to descend, it would be much too dangerous to use the ballast tanks. The Nautilus’s pumps are strong, but not strong enough to empty the tanks at a depth of three leagues,” he explained calmly.

“Three leagues?” I cried out. 

“Indeed, miss, if the professor’s numbers are correct.” 

“Are you sure this is wise, sir?” I asked in a whisper, not wanting any of my questions to be answered. I’d rather continue living in blissful ignorance. 

“Eleonora, you know very well I would never risk my Nautilus. Her construction makes her capable of resisting like a solid mass, and I put my absolute trust in her, as always,” he said, his voice slightly more stern in response to my doubt. 

“I know you do, but I am neither her captain, builder, nor engineer, and so I find it hard to do the same,” I muttered, and his face softened a little. 

“Then will you put your trust in the man who is?” he asked, with a glint in his eyes. I thought for a moment this was some kind of sick game to him, trying to throw me off balance in front of Pierre, but it was surely just my anxious mind playing tricks on me. 

“Always,” I sighed in concession, watching him warily, and he looked almost triumphant for a second. Pierre seemed to have been completely oblivious to the whole exchange, transfixed on the view outside the window, and I decided to join him in an attempt to ignore the Captain’s gaze. 

“Have you ever seen any fish below this depth, Capitaine?” asked Pierre as we just reached the first kilometer down. 

“Fish? Hardly ever! But given the current state of scientific affairs, who are we to presume, what do we actually know of these depths?” he answered, and I had to laugh a little. Apparently more than we did in a hundred and fifty years, if our depth sounding experiment proved Professor Aronnax correct. The very same seemed a little perturbed at this dismissal of society’s scientific achievements, and went on to give a detailed description of them to convince Captain Nemo that they were considerable indeed. He seemed intrigued, and continued questioning him. I did a good job of keeping my mouth shut, I’d already revealed too much unexplainable knowledge for one day, but my streak was ruined when a remarkable creature appeared outside the window.

“Look! A Dumbo octopus!” I exclaimed, rushing up to the window. My companions were silent, and I looked back to urge them to come have a closer look, but found them both watching me with great suspicion. 

“What did you call it, chérie?” asked Pierre carefully. I realised my blunder, and swallowed hard. 

“A Dumbo octopus…” I answered in a bashful tone, and went to sit back down.

“You have a name for this species?” he asked in the same disbelieving tone. 

“Where have you seen it before?” I didn’t know how to reply, and dared not meet their eyes.

“TV,” I whispered, staring into the floor. Captain Nemo still hadn’t said anything, but Pierre must have taken pity on me, and as many times before, chose to ignore my strange comment.

“How remarkable, chérie. I have never seen the creature described before,” he said in a kind tone. I looked up, feelings immense gratitude towards him, and he smiled a little. Glancing over to Captain Nemo, I saw him still watching me. I badly wanted to ask if he’d ever witnessed the sperm whales hunting giant squid at these depths, but dared not stretch my luck any further. Instead, we were all silent for a long while, and soon the chance of this sight had passed, as the pressure needle kept climbing. After an hour, we had reached a depth of over six kilometers, deeper than I’d expected or hoped to, and still there was no hint of us approaching the bottom. I felt the anxious knot in my gut tightening further, keeping pace with the needle on the depth gauge. After another hour, I could no longer sit still, and started pacing the room. I only stopped to down another drink, thankful that alcohol was considered acceptable medicine in these days. 

“Voilà, sommets!” cried Pierre while standing up, breaking the silence, and I looked over to the window. Indeed, the peaks of submerged mountains could now be seen, lit for the first time in eons by the Nautilus’s beacons. I went up to the pressure gauge. 

“Fourteen kilometers,” I said, my voice filled with ice cold dread. Fourteen kilometers down, four kilometers deeper than the deepest point of the Mariana Trench, and still no view of the actual seafloor. I thought of the Trieste, dizzying as my breathing grew shallower by the minute. I went over to Pierre on shaky legs, and he put an arm around me for comfort. I clung tightly to him, staring out as we descended past the mountain summits. I heard the Nautilus creaking, protesting the Captain’s daring quest, but he was resolutely looking out the window. 

“No living being has ever been this close to the Earth’s core before,” he said suddenly, speaking for the first time in these past two hours. 

“I’m not so sure, Captain. Turn the beacon lights off for a moment,” I said, in equal parts terror and reverie at this adventure. He looked me over again, eyeing me in that way that made me feel as though he tried to probe my mind for all its secrets, and I was sure he would question me. To my surprise he didn’t, but rather went over to the instrument panel, pressing a button. After a moment, the order had been transmitted, and the lights went off. Instead of the complete darkness one might have expected, we saw specks of light, like stars in the sky. The three of us looked out the windows, me in quiet confirmation of my suspicion, Pierre in absolute wonderment, and the Captain… His expression was as unreadable as ever. Studying the specks of light closer, as they whizzed past on all sides, it was possible to identify them as jellyfish, with pearls of bioluminescence trickling down their bell-shaped bodies. If we had stopped for a moment, we would have seen that the pearls shifted through every colour of the rainbow as they sped from top to bottom. These little creatures were nature’s neon signs, if you had the patience to study them closely. At our speed, they looked more like old-timey lightbulbs floating all around us in millions, and the whole experience was beyond surreal. 

“Comb jellies,” I stated, but neither Pierre nor Captain Nemo answered me. After a couple minutes, the latter made the decision that we needed to turn the beacon back on, and the jellyfish’s completely transparent bodies were no longer visible in the bright light. It was only then that the Captain decided to question me. 

“How did you know?” he asked in a grave voice, and I was well aware he wanted to know my secrets as bad as I wanted to know his. I released my grip on Pierre slightly, and turned to Nemo. 

“I saw them when I arose from the sea,” I said with a small smile, and though his eyes glinted at the joke, he said nothing, continuing his imploring stare. I sighed. 

“They’re all over the Swedish west coast, and the only explanation for their bioluminescence is that they’re originally deep sea dwellers. I suppose my thesis proved correct,” I stated simply, daring him to oppose this genuine explanation.

“A brilliant thesis, chérie. What a naturalist you’d make!” said Pierre warmly, and I turned my head back to look up at him with a warm smile. 

“Thank you, mon ami,” I said, before leaning my head on his shoulder. Captain Nemo didn’t question me further, and was silent again. He only opened his mouth to announce that we had reacher a depth of 52,000 feet. The rocky seafloor could just about be seen far beneath us. 

“What an experience!” Pierre exclaimed in a fervor. 

“Roaming these deep regions where no man has ever gone before! Look, mes amis! Look at those magnificent rocks, those empty caves, those last places on Earth where life is no longer possible! What unheard of scenery, and isn’t it a shame we’re reduced to preserving it only as a memory!” Neither Captain Nemo nor I could help but smile at him, as he spoke with such excitement, looking innocently boyish with wonder. 

“Would you like to bring back more than a memory?” asked the Captain in a warm voice. 

“What do you mean?” Pierre asked, turning to him with wide eyes. I did not think it was possible to feel anything but absolute love and devotion for the dear professor when he expressed himself like this, and thought I saw the same sentiment reflected in the Captain’s face. 

“I mean that nothing could be easier than taking a photograph of this underwater region,” he smiled, and before we knew it, he had the camera brought into the lounge. Conor and the other crewman nodded politely to us before setting it up. Soon after, Pierre was studying the negative in ecstasy, when Captain Nemo came up to us. Putting his hands on our shoulders, he stated;

“Let’s go back up, my friends. We mustn’t overdo things and leave the Nautilus vulnerable to these pressures for too long.” I didn’t appreciate the joke, and gave him a reproachful look, but he only smirked back.

“Let’s go back up,” agreed Pierre. Nemo gave the order to his crewmen, who quickly left to prepare for our ascent. 

“Hold on tight,” he warned us, and I remember thinking ‘to what?’ in confusion, before we were all hurled to the carpet. I thought I was lucky to have landed softly, before realising the reason why.

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” I exclaimed, trying to scramble off of him while still keeping my hands to myself. Captain Nemo was back on his feet quicker than should have been humanly possible, and extended his hand to help me up. I took it without meeting his eyes, fearing I would die from embarrassment, but I could feel him trying to hold back his laughter. We both quickly turned to help poor Pierre, who luckily seemed to have faired alright. He hardly took notice of us, walking up to the window to watch the water passing by outside with lightening speed. 

“Was that really necessary, Captain?” I asked in annoyance, having collected myself somewhat. 

“Not necessary, no, but by far the more amusing option,” he said without paying my annoyance any mind. 

“Mon Dieu, no man has ever travelled at this speed and lived to tell the tale, surely!” exclaimed Pierre by the window, in absolute fervor. I couldn’t exactly contradict him. I, however, had travelled by jetplane at what must be three times this speed. The Captain seemed a little disgruntled at my complete lack of amazement, I knew how much he enjoyed us fawning over his marvelous ship, but I was less than impressed by the stunt. I took care to look extremely bored, just to vex him. I almost wished I’d had a wrist watch, to glance at in irritation, and perhaps follow it up with an exasperated sigh. I had to settle for the pressure gauge, which, to be fair, did move at an alarming speed. At least it was going in the right direction now. As the first sight of the sunlight became visible, I said to Pierre;

“Best find a seat, mon ami, unless you want to take another tumble!” It was good advice, and as the Nautilus broke the surface with a mighty leap, we were all three safely seated for the fall back down into the water. Pierre’s enthusiasm made up for my lack of it, and he was talking excitedly with the Captain, calculating the speed with which we had ascended. I shook my head as he replied with the same enthusiasm. Boys and their giant toys were the same in every age, apparently. 

Chapter Text

“So, professor, it seems I was incorrect,” I said, seating myself on his bed after coming straight from breakfast. I’d had since yesterday to process this fact, but had been unable to come to a definite conclusion. Either the modern soundings of the seafloor were wrong, or the seafloor itself had changed in the time between. Or, but this option drove me into a near panic, this wasn’t the same universe where I’d gotten my numbers from. To say I didn’t know much about string theory is an understatement, but what little information I had told me it was just as likely I had been transported to an alternate universe than through time. Perhaps nothing I knew applied in this world, if it was a different timeline entirely. I thought I had enough historical knowledge to be able to confirm whether this was true or not. Or at least, to confirm if anything at all was the same. I knew of course that the world map looked largely the same, accounting for some discrepancies easily explained by the lack of satellites, but yesterday we had gone down to a depth of five kilometers more than the supposedly deepest part of the ocean. In contrast, I knew that the works of fiction in the library I had also read in my time were identical. Last night, while grappling with these arguments, I had the thought to check the newspapers that could be found in the library. They varied a little in age, the latest ones being from 1865. I flipped through them, until I found one in English, a copy of The Times, which had already been in print for over a hundred years at this point. It was from 1864, and I relaxed somewhat as I read the headlines, recognising most events. They mentioned happenings of the American civil war, referenced president Lincoln, talked of the results of the ending of the Polish January uprising, and others familiar historical episodes. Naturally, I could not recognise every single event, but that would have been the case even with a modern paper, so this fact didn’t prove too disconcerting. ‘Denmark to surrender territories following defeat in Dano-Prussian war’ - this headline made me blink, for I had pathetically little knowledge of Scandinavian history. I’d always been far more interested in British history, for example. Apparently the Swedish-Norwegian union had refused to give military aid to Denmark in the war, which didn’t surprise me. I continued skimming through the paper. ‘The Butcher from Bundelkhand still at large, despite intense two year search effort’ - I’d never heard the name before, and skirmished the article. This ‘Butcher’ was some important figure in the Indian Rebellion that had taken place a decade earlier, a former raja, whose opposition of the British rule had earned him that charming nickname. I scoffed. God forbid someone tries to resist the almighty British Empire. I hoped for his sake that they still hadn’t caught him. 

“So it would seem, ma chérie, although I hope you will not hold it against me,” smiled Pierre from his desk, where he was putting down the details of our adventure yesterday into his journal. 

“I can’t promise I won’t. You know the saying, don’t you? ‘Hell hath no fury like a woman proven wrong’,” I said, and he laughed. 

“Do direct some of that fury towards the Capitaine as well, if you will, for without him I would never have been able to convince you,” he said smugly. 

“Oh, to be sure. There is enough to go around,” I joked, clearly anything but furious. 

“At least you were correct about the… comment les appeliez-vous, mademoiselle? Comb jellyfish?” he said diplomatically.

“Ah, yes, or just Comb jellies,” I answered, thinking back on the magical experience for a moment. 

“Comb jellies… And you have seen them at your island?” Pierre asked incredulously. I had maybe been a bit hasty to confirm this fact so readily, since they were an invasive species, not seen in Swedish waters until the 21st century, but how was he supposed to confirm otherwise? So I told him of the wondrous little creatures, and as I described them closer, he realised that what must be a close relative did indeed appear in his book. He then quieted uncharacteristically, and looked at me.

“And… the octopus? Have you seen that one at the island as well?” he enquired, but I knew it was out of kindness, since he was well aware no such creature lived in the shallow coastal waters of Sweden. I was just thinking of how to explain this to him, when we were interrupted by a knock at the door. 

“Monsieur? C'est moi et Ned,” came Conseil’s voice. Pierre glanced at me, clearly eager to hear my explanation, but I had been given respite in trying to come up with one. 

“Entrez, mes amis,” he called, and our friends stepped into the room. Conseil looked a little startled to find me there, still perhaps getting used to the idea after knowing the professor for a decade, but Ned looked amused. 

“Fates in your favour again last night, professor?” he said with a laugh, and poor Pierre flushed red, which only made Ned laugh more. Neither of us corrected their assumptions though, both staying true to the agreement. 

“Well, I’m glad they’re in someone’s favour at least, cause things sure aren’t looking great in regards to our escape,” Ned then sighed, sobering somewhat. He leaned against the wall, and thought for a moment, before speaking again.

“How many men do you figure are aboard the Nautilus?”

“From what I’ve seen, some three dozen crewmen inhabit the ship, but mademoiselle will have a better idea,” answered Pierre warily. 

“No, I think your guess is about right, professor, although I don’t have an exact number either,” I answered in resignation, knowing exactly what kind of plans had brought on Ned Land’s query. If he was planning some kind of uprising against the crew, I would not be able to choose a side. Taking the coward’s way out, I stated simply;

“Gentlemen, I am no longer an impartial spectator to your plans, and will there for take my leave if you are to discuss them. Don’t hurt anyone,” I added in a grave voice, as I passed Ned on my way out.

I don’t know what conclusions they came to during the rest of their conversation, but I could imagine they had not been to Ned Land’s liking, for when I later found the three of them up on the platform he looked more glum than ever before. I sat down with them, sighing in compassion with their situation. Soon though, he would find a worthy distraction from their predicament. 

“There she blows!” he called suddenly, rising in a fervor. Me, Pierre and Conseil arose as well, our eyes fixed on the horizon Ned Land was scanning so prodigiously.

“Qu'est-ce que c'est, Ned?” asked Pierre, as neither of us had yet spotted anything.

“Was it a whale?” I put in excitedly. Before he could answer either of us, the animal surfaced again, in the far distance. 

“Oh man! If I were aboard a whaler, that beast would be a golden opportunity! It’s a big one! Look how high its blowhole is spouting all that air and steam! Damnation! Why am I chained to this hunk of sheet iron?” he exclaimed passionately. 

“Longing to go for a Nantucket sleighride, mr. Land?” I asked him with a smile. It was easy to imagine the thrill of the hunt, and despite not being any sort of hunter myself, I could respect these men who went after some of the largest animals to ever live in only a small boat. I wasn’t unfamiliar with the danger, or the hard work associated with whaling in this day and age, factors not unimportant in the impending decline of the business. A far cry from the deplorable whale fishing of my day, which I in turn had no respect whatsoever for. It was the difference of hunting an elephant with bow and arrow versus a rifle. 

“Oh, you bet! Although, being dragged by my harpoon, it’s a Québec sleighride,” he said, turning from the horizon for a second to wink at me. 

“What’s this, Ned? You still aren’t over your old fishing urges?” asked Pierre. 

“How could a whale fisherman give up his old trade, sir? What harpooner could ever forget the thrill of the chase?” he answered with great enthusiasm. 

“You’ve never fished these seas, Ned?” Pierre enquired, and soon, a lively debate on the differences in whale species between the northern and southern hemisphere broke out, which turned so intense my companions switched to French, and it was hard for me to follow along. Perhaps just as well, or I might have overshared, like yesterday. Instead, I watched as the huge animal approached, and it was indeed a southern right whale, that poor species decimated to near extinction by the whaling industry. To my excitement, and Ned’s indignation, it wasn’t alone, and the flock was nearing the Nautilus, seemingly intrigued by this strange, steel relative of theirs. I looked away from the delightful sight for a few seconds when I heard Conseil utter Captain Nemo’s name, and before I could understand what was going on, Ned Land rushed off down the companionway. I looked at the other two with a questioning frown.

“He’s gone to ask the Capitaine for permission to hunt one of these beasts,” explained Pierre. I had no idea wether the Captain would be amenable to this. It would most likely depend entirely on if we could make use of such a large animal or not, for I knew he would not let Ned slay the animal needlessly. I greatly admired this intense sense of justice in the Captain, but would soon find out that it was by no means infallible. It was only moments before he appeared on the platform, Ned along with him. He studied the pod, and confirmed my assertion that they were southern right whales. To Ned’s great dismay, he also confirmed that we had no need for a slain whale, and gave the man a lecture on hunting ethics. I couldn’t help but beam with pride at this unusual and modern view on animal rights, although his assessment on their natural enemies did not sound quite correct to me. Ned did not share my feelings of admiration. He was beyond annoyed at having to forgo this opportunity to practice his bloodthirsty craft, and I suppose I could sympathise, for he was rarely afforded a chance onboard to do much of anything that interested him. Still, I was glad I wouldn’t have to watch one of the beautiful creatures killed in what must surely have been a less than humane way. The relief proved short-lived, as Captain Nemo turned our attention from the right whales.

“I was right to claim that baleen whales have enough natural enemies without counting man. These individuals will soon have to deal with mighty opponents. Eight miles to leeward, can you see those dark spots moving around?” he said, pointing into the far distance. 

“Orcas, Captain?” I asked in confusion, it being the only whale species I knew to attack its cousins. But still, even a whole pod of orcas could not do much damage to any of the right whales, apart from young, or sick ones. I highly doubted his claim that they would be ‘mighty opponents’. 

“No, miss, those are cachalots. Dreadful animals I’ve sometimes encountered in pods of two- or three-hundred! As for them, they’re cruel, destructive beasts and they deserve to be exterminated.” I stood dumbfounded, staring at him. Had his expression not been so serious and his voice not so grave, I would have assumed he was joking. I’d never heard of sperm whales attacking other whales, they fed on squid, and smaller fish. Their narrow jaws were not equipped for any sturdier prey than that. I put forward these arguments to the Captain, but he refuted them swiftly. I blinked at him in disbelief. 

“Ned, tell him! You must be familiar with these animals!” I begged the harpooner, to which Captain Nemo’s eyes flashed in anger. But Ned had seen his chance to go for the ‘Nantucket sleighride’, and would not risk it by contradicting the Captain. To my horror, neither Pierre would help me dissuade him of these notions.

“Well, Capitaine, on behalf of the right whales, there’s still time-” he began, but was interrupted.

“No need to run any risks, professor. The Nautilus itself can disperse these sperm whales. It’s armed with a steel spur quite equal to mr. Land’s harpoon, I expect,” said Captain Nemo calmly. Ned’s whole demeanor instantly changed, from hopeful, to exasperated. I was staring in unbridled terror at the Captain. What was he saying?

“Just wait, Professor Aronnax. We’ll show you a new type of hunting. We’ll take no pity on those ferocious cetaceans. They’re merely mouth and teeth!” With those words, he started walking down the companionway. I could still not comprehend what I was hearing. This went completely against my views of the Captain. 

“Sir, you cannot be serious,” I said, my voice quiet and pained, as I struggled to come to terms with this sudden streak of cruelty in him. He heard me, and stopped.

“And why not, miss? Would you rather the poor right whales be exterminated?” he asked, irritated at me contradicting him. I went up to him, staring into his face at eye-level for once, and tried to understand where this irrational hate was coming from.

“Well?” he urged me when I did not answer him. 

“But I don’t believe they will be. Please, just wait and you’ll see,” I implored him, in absolute conviction that the only harm to either whale could come from us. His face turned hard.

“Too many times I have waited. I’ve learnt from my mistakes,” he said callously, and continued down the stairs. I rushed after him, and heard the others behind me.

“Captain, please! I’m begging you!” I called after him as he went towards the wheelhouse. 

“Save your sympathies for those that deserve it,” he told me over his shoulder, not pausing his stride. 

“Mademoiselle…” came Pierre’s voice from behind me, trying to stop my campaign. But I was growing more and more agitated. I could not let this happen.

“Those that deserve it? Sir, they’re innocent animals!” I exclaimed, still in disbelief at this turn of events.

“Innocent? They’re tyrants of the sea!” sneered Captain Nemo, quickly losing his patience. We’d reached the wheelhouse, and Javier looked up in confusion as the angered Captain was followed by me in my fervor, my friends not far behind. I finally caught up with Nemo, and put a hand on his shoulder. He turned around with a frown.

“Go to the lounge,” he told the four of us, trying to maintain his usual composure. 

“I won’t. I can’t let you do this,” I said resolutely, bloody images of giant, massacred corpses strewn over beaches and quays flashing in my mind. I heard Pierre gasp, Ned mutter a curse, and Captain Nemo’s face turned furious at this insolence. 

“You can’t let me?” he said through gritted teeth, his eyes flashing with rage. He turned to Javier, and uttered a few words. Javier’s eyes widened, and he looked between us, but Nemo’s expression must have convinced him not to argue, and he stepped towards me. Before he had a chance to execute whatever he’d been ordered to, I felt a set of strong hands on my shoulders, dragging me away.

“Captain, she’s sorry, we’re going now. Please, proceed,” came Ned’s voice over my head, an unusual tone of humility in his voice. Javier stopped, glancing to the Captain, who sighed and waved us off. But I had not understood the severity of my crime, having no experience of the way in which hierarchy permeated every part of this world I had been thrown into. 

“No! You’re not killing those animals! Are you mad?!” I shouted, struggling as I was pulled away from the wheelhouse by Ned’s indisputable strength.

“Are you?!” he hissed in my ear, and lifted me up to stop my struggling, Pierre and Conseil right behind us. I was not let down despite my kicking and screaming until we reached the lounge, where I tried to rush back, all rationality in my mind replaced by panic over what was about to happen. Ned shut the door in my face, and pulled me by the wrist to one of the sofas, shoving me down. 

“Unless you want to be keelhauled, I suggest you stay seated,” he told me sternly, and something in his expression of anger and genuine concern made me pause. It was only then I fully realised that I had not only defied a direct order from the Captain, but also questioned his decisions in the rudest way possible. No matter, I could not have lived with myself if I had not tried to stop the onslaught that followed. I’ll never know if Captain Nemo had been right, for the sperm whales didn’t get a chance to commit the crime they had been convicted of, before the executions started. I looked on in cold dread at the carnage outside the window, sitting frozen in place where Ned had put me down. Pierre came to sit next to me, taking my hand. I’m not sure if he tried to say something, I wouldn’t have heard it, for I was transfixed on the sight of the enormous bodies outside, maimed and tortured. Any counterattack on the whales’ part was useless against the Nautilus’s steel hull. The terrified shrieks of the animals ripped through me as sure as if I was the one that had been cut. As a mortally wounded whale drifted past, almost cut in half, but still alive, I met its large eye through the window. Pierre put his handkerchief to my face, and I realised that tears were streaming from my staring eyes.

“Chérie, je te prie, look away,” he said with great emotion, but I was unable to. How could I consolidate the horrific gore I was witnessing with my feelings for the Captain? It was the worst betrayal I’d ever experienced, that this man would display such insane, unnecessary violence towards helpless animals. My whole life, no injustice had made my blood boil such as that endured by animals at the hands of man, and a slaughter such as this was unforgivable. I finally closed my eyes, the nausea from my anger and sorrow threatening to best me. I felt Pierre embracing me, pressing my face into his shoulder to shield me from the needless evil. I clung to him, fervently grasping at his jacket, and finally started sobbing. 

I do not know how much time passed before the attacks eventually grew sparser, to then stop completely. When I opened my eyes again, the visibility outside was all but gone from the amount of blood in the water, the only thing we could still see were pieces of torn flesh swirling around. I could no longer hold back, and had just enough time to lean over the armrest of the sofa to hurl onto the floor. I felt my vision disappearing, and fell back down. 

When I came to, Pierre was fanning me, Ned held out a glass of water, and Conseil had gone to fetch a rag. I let them faff over me, but insisted on cleaning up the mess myself. I said nothing, and as all tears had dried up, I only stared straight ahead, my insides cold and hard from disappointment. We felt the Nautilus rise up to the surface, but as the others went up to the platform, I went into my cabin. I laid down on the bed, and stared up at the ceiling, filled with the apathy that only follows after a complete disenchantment such as this. At that moment, I did not see how I could care about what happened to me ever again. Before too long, there was a knock at the door. I did not answer it, but it opened anyway. Captain Nemo stepped in, accompanied by Jakub and Kumar. His expression was hard, and full of resignation. Jakub and Kumar both looked sorry to be there.

“Time for the keelhauling?” I asked in an emotionless voice, turning my eyes back to the ceiling after shooting them a quick glance. 

“Twenty-four hours in the brig, for your insolence and disobedience to the captain,” he stated, his voice cold as ice. 

“What captain? You’re a butcher, nothing more,” I said, trying to mimic his tone, but my voice broke at the end. It felt as though the temperature of the room dropped ten degrees, the very atmosphere of the ship adjusting to his mood, but he said nothing. Then, I heard his footsteps disappearing.

“Jakub will escort you, Madam,” said Kumar, his voice tinged with emotion, before his footsteps followed the Captain’s. Jakub came into view, and he looked absolutely distraught. He held out his hand to me, and I sighed, sitting up on the bed. I did not take his hand, but arose and started walking towards the brig, Jakub following behind. As he was closing the door, he hesitated for a moment, and I turned my head to him. His expression was anguished, and feeling a twinge of sympathy, I nodded to him. As the door shut, leaving me in the dark, I thought that the crew were perhaps as much captives of the mad Captain as myself, Pierre, Ned and Conseil. 

Hours or minutes later, I do not know, the door opened again. I’d been staring into the dark, my head full and empty of thoughts at the same time, and the light filtering in from the corridor seemed brighter than the sun. I blinked into it, trying to see who was there, but it took a few seconds for my eyes to adjust. 

“Are you alright, priya?” came Kumar’s voice, and I sighed in relief. I was not ready to go another round with the Captain at the moment.

“Yes, my friend, I’m alright,” I said, and he seemed to sigh in relief too, but I couldn’t tell if it was for my wellbeing or over the fact that I wasn’t angry at him. 

“About as alright as that amputee, Madam?” he joked gently, stepping into the room, and I huffed a little.
“Perhaps slightly worse off. I feel as though my heart has been ripped out, Kumar,” I said, my voice breaking again. I don’t know that I’d planned to share quite that much, but what did it matter anymore?

“Oh, priya…” he said, sinking down onto the floor next to me, and putting his arm around me. I leant my head on his shoulder, closing my eyes to stave off the intense pain ripping through me. 

“How could he do something like that?” I whispered, holding onto some sliver of hope this too could be explained and excused, but how I did not know. 

“I wish I was allowed to explain his reasons, Madam, for he does have them, even if I may not agree with this particular incident,” he said, his tone growing annoyed by the end. 

“What of the rest of the crew? Did they agree to the slaughter?” I asked quietly. 

“It wouldn’t matter, priya, the Nautilus is his ship,” he sighed. 

“So everyone else onboard was against it? And yet I was the only one to speak up?” I said in growing irritation, lifting my head to look at him.

“And look where it got you,” he said, but his voice was empathetic, and he gave a small smile. 

“He can’t throw us all in the brig,” I muttered.

“Are you proposing mutiny, Madam?” he asked with a chuckle.

“Why not?” I said apathetically, drawing my knees up to my chin. 

“Well, if anyone could stage one, it would be you, little Rani,” he said, sobering again, and I looked at him with raised eyebrows. 

“If you tell him that, I suppose I may as well move in here for good.” 

“Oh ho, then I believe he would have an actual mutiny on his hands, priya! Besides, twenty-four hours was the most he could bear to give you,” he said, the corners of his mouth twitching a little. My eyebrows furrowed instead, and I stared at him. His smile grew wider, and he shook his head.

“What do you think the normal punishment for insubordination is, Madam?” he said with a meaning look. I think I must have paled as his words sank in. Somehow though, I didn’t feel grateful that I had been spared whatever should have happened to me. Instead, it felt as confirmation that I would never truly be considered part of the crew. Was it because I was a woman? Would my gender mean I would never actually be able to leave the periphery? They may love me, but would they respect me as an equal? And after today, was I as sure I wanted to be part of them as I had been before? 

Kumar arose, and I thought he was leaving, but he only went out the door to grab the plate of food he’d brought for me.

“Oh, I get to eat too while I’m in here?” I said sarcastically, but he only gave me a tired look. 

“Sorry. It was kind of you to bring it, but I doubt I’ll be able to have any,” I sighed. 

“Well, just in case,” he shrugged. He went out the door again, and brought in a large bundle of cloth. It was my bedding, and I smiled sadly at him. 

“Thank you, Kumar, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to sleep either.”

“Take it all the same, priya, or I won’t get a wink either, thinking of you in here,” he implored me. 

“Very well,” I said, accepting the bundle. As he went to actually leave, I grabbed his hand.

“Thank you, my friend,” I said, looking at him intently. He gave a sad smile too, and nodded to me.

Chapter Text

“Some sailor you’ll make, speaking to the captain of the ship like that. And after the advice you gave me as well! I would have thought you would at least follow it yourself,” Ned berated me, but only after giving me a rib-cracking hug. Pierre put his hand to my cheek, looking at me intently. 

“We were worried about you, chérie,” he said admonishingly. “What were you thinking, speaking to the Capitaine like that?” 

“I was thinking that he was wrong, and he needed to hear it,” I said in an emotionless voice. Pierre stared at me, seeming unable to understand what he must have interpreted as the nonchalance on my part. It was not nonchalance, it was apathy. 

The door opened, leaving me blind for a moment again. I must have slept some, but not much. I’d tried to eat the food Kumar had brought, but it tasted bland and pointless, like texture only. Despite this, I was not worse off for having spent the night in the brig. I wouldn’t go so far as to say it had been nice, it just hadn’t been any different to if I’d spent the same night in my cabin. The food would have tasted just as bland, the bed been just as uncomfortable, for nowhere would I have been able to escape my thoughts. It wasn’t just the thoughts of the needless slaughter that plagued my mind, but also the implications of it. If Captain Nemo could commit such a deed with the sure conviction that it was justice, what else was he capable of? Perhaps whatever acts were done in the name of his quest were all as misdirected as yesterday’s killings, while all done with good intentions. But the road to hell is paved with those, isn’t it? 

“The twenty-four hours are up,” he told me, his voice somewhat less icy than the day before. I tried to see his face as my eyes adjusted to the light, tried to see if there was any remorse in his expression. When I saw none, I had to look away to stop myself from crying. I was not ready to have to rethink my view on him so completely, to rethink my whole future I had so looked forward to aboard the Nautilus. When I did not rise, he urged me on;

“Miss Larsson, you are free to go.” 

“What was the purpose of putting me in here, Captain?” I asked, staring straight ahead. He paused for a moment before answering, seeming unsure of what I meant.

“Punishment for your insubordination,” he then said, but his voice lacked some of its usual authority. 

“To deter me from further insubordination?” I continued, my voice now icy. “I was under the impression a true leader need not worry about insubordination. If he does, he is lacking in judgment on either who is allowed to follow him, or lacking in judgment in his decision making.”

I turned to him with a meaning glance, and he stepped into the room, his face pale from anger. I held his gaze, no longer fearing his rage, for I had little left to lose from it. He said nothing for a long while, and to his credit he seemed to contemplate my words. The only take from it was to admit he had either been wrong in letting me join his crew, or wrong in slaughtering the whales. Finally, he put his hand to his forehead, massaging it, and leant against the wall. 

“I hear that twenty-four hours was a little lax, so perhaps you are right about my judgment,” he then sighed. Anger flared up inside me at his words. 

“Ah, going down the path of tyranny rather than admit you were wrong? Indeed, I’m sure if you left me in here a month or so I would come out pliant and submissive enough to agree to most anything. If that is how you’d prefer things, by all means, don’t let me keep you,” I sneered, and gestured to the door. I was sure he would leave, enraged, and perhaps even try to call my bluff. Only, I wasn’t sure I was bluffing, for I felt I needed to mangle the truth on whether he was the man I thought or not out of him, if it was the last thing I ever did. But instead, he looked me over, no anger at all left in his expression, only wondering. 

“Why were those beasts so important to you?” he asked, shaking his head slightly. I stared at him. Did he not really not understand? 

“All animals are important to me, sir. You had no right to butcher them, even if your claims were true. They have a right to exist, even if you disagree with their existence. But furthermore, I never imagined to see such cruelty from you of all people. Kumar assures me there is a reason behind your actions, but since I am not aware of it, they read only as sadistic to me. And it pains me terribly to think of you as anything but a good man, Captain,” I said, almost pleading, trying to make him see my point of view through my complete honesty. I still held out hope that he would give me his reason, to magically let me continue viewing him as I had before, my perfect Odysseus. Until yesterday, it had been so easy to convince myself that everything he did was backed by some divine sense of right and wrong, that all his actions could be explained. I had been able to ignore all evidence to the contrary, including our imprisonment, for I had been so sure that once I found it out, I would completely sympathise and agree with his purpose. With this sudden doubt I was faced with, all that evidence instead seemed to be at the forefront of my mind, and I could no longer go on admiring him as I had before. 

“You said you could wait,” he said quietly, with so much sadness it cut into my heart like a razor. I had to squeeze my eyes shut, gather my strength not to give in immediately, again forgetting every argument against him. 

“I did not expect such a display, Captain, or I would not have agreed so readily to your terms,” I said, trying to keep the emotion out of my voice. “Now, I can no longer ignore what I have seen. I will need your explanation before I can ever look at you the same way again. It had better be a good one.”

My words seemed to affect him as if I had slapped him, and when I saw that his eyes were glassy, all resolve ran off me in an instant. I got up, and went over to him, wanting nothing more than to comfort him, but felt unable to do so without abandoning any self-respect I’d ever had. I tried to meet his eyes, but he refused to look at me, straining to regain his calm superiority. I would not have it, feeling I was very close to getting him to finally give in, this true turning point beckoning me on. I grabbed him by the shoulders, and tried to force him to look at me. He finally did, his expression terrified, but he still said nothing. I felt the hopelessness threatening to overwhelm me, and with my last effort to persuade him, I lost all composure. I shook him desperately, and shouted at him in my strained voice;

“Tell me why, Odysseus, for I cannot bear to think ill of you! Tell me!” He shut his eyes, and turned his face away again. I held onto him for a moment longer, as my last hope slowly faded like a burnt out candle, thinking he might still speak up. But he did not. I released my grip, my arms fell to my sides, and I turned around with a deep, deep sigh. I took a few heavy steps back to my makeshift bed, and sank down against the wall. He remained for several minutes, but I did not look at him. He still said nothing, and soon I heard his footsteps disappearing, as heavy as mine had been. The door remained open, but it would be a long while before I collected myself enough to leave the room. 

“Not feeling so great, huh? No wonder, the brig’s no place for a lady. Still, I’m surprised a day’s all you got. I thought for sure we’d have to rescue you, but then that officer taking the survey every day came to tell us you’d only been given twenty-four hours, so we figured you’d survive,” Ned told me with a smirk, standing over me as I was curled up on a sofa in the lounge. Pierre was sat next to me, insisting I take a ‘strengthening drink’, and I didn’t have the energy to object. Conseil seemed to be as upset with my behaviour as with the punishment I had been given for it, and was sitting further away, sometimes shaking his head. 

“It was kind of Kumar to tell you, I wouldn’t have wanted you to do something rash,” I told them, as Pierre wrapped a blanket around my shoulders. I thought the care-taking was getting excessive at this point, and had to put a stop to it by grabbing his hands. 

“Oh, you have exclusive rights to rash behaviour, do you, your highness?” jeered Ned. I shrugged.

“I’ve not suffered for my actions, a night in the brig did me no harm. I would do the same again,” I said truthfully. This gave Ned some pause.

“To spare those beasts?” he asked incredulously. 

“They’re not beasts. They’re intelligent mammals, with advanced social hierarchies, and have thoughts and feelings, the same as us,” I exclaimed in a fervor, thinking back on how they’d been so brutally executed, simply for the crime of existing. Ned sank into an armchair with a sigh.

“If that’s how you feel, I can see why you’d be so upset. Damnation, even I felt sick to my stomach yesterday, and I’ve slain more whales than I can count! You must think I’m some kind of monster,” he said, adding the last bit in a sad voice. 

“Not at all, Ned. That’s been over the course of decades, and although I’m aware of your skill, I dare say the whales have a fighting chance even against the King of harpooners in a simple longboat. You don’t kill dozens of them at once with a machine, for no reason at that!” I spat out, getting enraged again. 

“But mademoiselle, what evidence have you that the Capitaine wasn’t correct, and that he saved the right whales?” asked Pierre diplomatically. I knew he must understand that half the reason I was so upset was that I felt betrayed by Captain Nemo, and he was only trying to ease this pain. 

“It doesn’t really matter, mon ami. He shouldn’t play god, and meddle with nature in that way,” I sighed. 

“I’ll agree with you there, El, but those cachalot’s can be fearsome when they want to, trust me,” Ned put in, in a serious tone. 

“Oh, I don’t doubt that, Ned. But don’t they have the right to be, when defending themselves? Pierre, I heard you mention the whaler Essex yesterday. I’m familiar with that story, but I’m worried what Ned will say when I tell you that I don’t think that cachalot did anything wrong. Would not any of us have done the same if our family was attacked?” I said, hoping these 19th century men might understand some of my 21st century animal rights activism. 

“Maybe you wouldn’t think so if you’d heard the story first-hand,” Ned muttered, and me and Pierre turned to him in surprise.

“Que voulez-vous dire, Ned?” he asked him. Ned leaned back in the chair, and said in a grave voice;

“I’ve met Captain Pollard, of the Essex. He still lives in Nantucket, works as the night watchman, since he didn’t have much luck as a captain, I guess.” He huffed a little, before continuing.

“Anyway, we were waiting for repairs after a storm, and had a few days aport. Pollard was gonna… ‘enforce the curfew’, but when he found out who I was he bought me a drink instead,” Ned laughed. 

“This was a few years ago, and he was an old man as you can imagine, but his mind was clear, and he was a cheery bastard. Sorry, professor,” he added at Pierre’s stern gaze. I was sat in breathless concentration at his story. To think, I was conversing with a man who’d met Captain Pollard! What a strange existence my life had become. Ned went on, encouraged by our silence. 

“When I found out who he was, hell, I nearly fell out my chair. I mean, he’s a legend! To live through something like that… The Essex was almost ninety foot, but so was the whale. White as alabaster, he said, and as fearsome as any sea monster of old. Not only did it sink his ship, it followed them for weeks as they drifted in the longboats! It wanted every last one of them dead, and that beast almost had its wish, but they were rescued. After three long months adrift the Pacific, they were saved. Everyone knows how they survived, of course, even if old Pollard didn’t bring up that detail. But then again, neither would I, I suppose, if I’d had to eat my own cousin…” Ned said with a shudder. 

“Ned! Mademoiselle est déjà agitée,” admonished Pierre, putting his arms around me. Ned seemed to remember himself, and was about to apologise, when I interjected.

“No, no, it’s alright. Like I said, I’m familiar with the story, although I’ve never heard it from such a direct source before,” I said quietly, still awestruck by the fact that Ned had met this man. It was sometimes too easy to forget the full implications of my time-travel, but moments like these made it overwhelmingly real.

Chapter Text

We passed between the South Shetland and South Orkney islands on March 15th, and the Nautilus showed no sign of changing its southbound heading. We were now abreast of the northernmost part of Antarctica, its gigantic peninsula, and although we could continue further south still, eventually we would reach the vast expanse of the mainland. Was Captain Nemo hoping to reach the South Pole? He would be sorely disappointed when he realised it was impossible, unless he was planning to leave the Nautilus. It was a decade yet before Nordenskiöld, my countryman, would even discover the Northeast Passage through the Arctic, and another half century before the South Pole would be reached by Amundsen, from our neighbouring country. With them in mind, I too thrived in this colder climate, and would happily sit up on the platform and breathe in the fresh scent of ice, as we passed the growing masses of it. The light was familiar, and its presence for all but a brief nighttime was not unusual to me. I felt right at home, even though this was the opposite side of the globe. Captain Nemo would spend many hours up there as well, when he was not navigating through the narrow passageways made by the ice, but we did not speak. I tried to not let it bother me, acting as indifferent to him as I possibly could, but it did take a great deal of strength. When Pierre joined us, the Captain would speak to him, and sometimes it seemed almost as if he was waiting for me to add something, but I never did. Pierre would admonish me for not wearing enough warm clothes, but I laughed and told him it was not even below zero degrees Celsius yet, and he looked at me in horror.

“Mon Dieu, chérie, how cold must it get before you feel it?” I thought for a moment, looking him up and down. He was, unlike me, dressed up to resemble nothing so much as a teddy bear in all the fur. He looked absolutely adorable, and I smiled fondly at him.

“I have spent winter days with temperatures of minus thirty degrees and below without having to bundle up in the way you currently have, mon ami. No wonder you lost your entire army in Russia,” I said with feigned sympathy, and I thought I heard Captain Nemo try to stifle a laugh, but he standing further away and looking out to sea, so I couldn’t be sure. Pierre frowned indignantly.

“But you look absolutely delightful, so please, don’t let me dissuade you,” I said, kissing his cold cheek with a smile. He couldn’t help but smile back. In a moment of boldness, or weakness, I added;

“As you know, I fare much worse in warm temperatures.” I glanced over at the Captain again, and he glanced over in the same moment, meeting my eyes. 

“You don’t feel the need to go for a swim in these waters then, miss?” he asked, his expression neutral, but I could detect the teasing tone of his voice. Every moment of having to repress my feelings for him was agony, and the days had been long, so I could not help but indulge myself for just a little longer. 

“I have gone ice bathing before, Captain, so I don’t see why not,” I challenged him. To my great satisfaction, he looked surprised, but his expression was nothing to match Pierre’s one.

“Ice bathing! Voluntarily! Vous êtes fou, mademoiselle!” he exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. I had to laugh at him. 

“I should like to see that claim proven, miss,” said the Captain, and I cursed my heart for jumping at seeing him smile so fondly at me. The images of the dying whales flashed before my eyes, their panicked crying screeching in my ears, and I frowned in pain. Looking down at my feet, I answered coldly;

“I wouldn’t want to worry Pierre, so you’ll have to take my word for it.” 

“A wise choice, chérie, I am freezing just thinking about it!” said Pierre, innocent relief in his voice. He’d meant it apparently, for he left us for the warmth of the Nautilus’s interior after this. I sat down again, looking out at the icebergs, shifting in their myriad of colours and appearances. It was a sight I was not familiar with, and I found it fascinating, but could no longer ignore the Captain, now that I’d opened that door again. 

“How badly would you like to see it?” I asked, loud enough for him to hear me where he was stood, but didn’t turn my head. 

“How badly do you want to show me?” came his reply after a moment, and my heart skipped a beat. This was dangerous territory, I knew that. Why had I said anything in the first place? 

“Oh, I know I’m telling the truth, so I have no need to prove it to myself, Captain,” I huffed, trying to ignore my speeding heartbeat as I heard him walking over. He sank down next to me, and I could feel him studying me.

“You already have my word that I shall share our secrets, so what else would you like? You don’t need to risk your life with an ice bath, I do believe you. If there is something you want, you need only ask,” he said in a quiet, earnest tone, and I had to dig my nails into the palms of my hands to stop myself from throwing my arms around him. ‘I want you, no matter what you do, I will always want you’, I thought, and felt an overwhelming sense of self-loathing over this. How could I abandon all my principles, everything I knew to be right, for a man? But he wasn’t just any man. I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath. 

“I did tell you what I wanted. I wanted you to spare the whales. I wanted you to listen to me,” I said, my voice quivering pathetically. He didn’t reply for a long while, and when he did, I had to stop another impulse to embrace him, for he sounded so anguished it threated to break my heart.

“And if I told you I regretted it deeply, and that I would listen in the future, would that be enough? Could you forgive me, even if I did not yet explain why I did it?” I wanted to scream, to shout at him, bang my fists against his chest, to make him understand. Why didn’t he understand?! I drew my knees up, covered my head with my arms, dug my nails deeper into my palms, all to stop the scream building in me. 

“Eleonora..?” he asked, putting an uncertain hand on my shoulder. I recoiled as if I’d been burnt, scrambled to my feet, and stared at him. He stared back, bewildered, unable to grasp the reason behind my reaction. I couldn’t help myself any longer, I finally snapped, and let out the scream as my vision blurred with tears.

“Don’t you understand? I do forgive you! Of course I forgive you, anything you ever have or ever will do! I don't have a choice in the matter!" I watched for a second as his eyes widened further, as he struggled to take in my words, but I was too upset to stay any longer than that. I turned and hurried down the companionway, furiously wiping at my tears as I cursed myself for not staying silent from the beginning.

Chapter Text

Over the ensuing days, I took little interest in anything. The crew had all been very kind to me since my night in the brig, doing their best to cheer me up, even though they could not know the reason behind my shifted mood. I would sit with them, and answer any questions, laugh politely at their jokes, but had no will or energy to participate myself. When I was not in the mess hall, I would spend much time in my cabin, since I ran the risk of encountering the Captain elsewhere. Pierre, Ned and Conseil would sometimes come and sit with me in there, also doing their best to cheer me up, but it proved a difficult task. The most successful attempt came from Ned Land, as he brought his guitar and a bottle of the Palmata liquor one evening.

“Look what I found!” he said with a grin, as he held it up. I had to laugh at this, and we spent a few pleasant hours together while the Nautilus cruised underneath the ice barrier. Pierre had told me that Captain Nemo had announced that we would indeed go to the South Pole, but I couldn’t quite muster neither surprise nor enthusiasm over this. Perhaps I would be proven wrong again, like with the descent to the bottom of the Atlantic. Frankly, I didn’t care either way. 

Pierre, on the other hand, was ecstatic at our adventure, and woke me up early in the morning of March 19th. I had spent a lot of time sleeping lately, and would sometimes not wake up until midday. That meant I only had to go down to the mess hall once a day, which in all honesty took enough effort in terms of socialising, so I didn’t even try to change this pattern. 

“Mademoiselle! We have reached the open sea again! We have crossed the ice bank!” Pierre said, gently shaking me awake. I groaned, and opened my eyes with a frown.

“That’s great, Pierre. The Captain must be happy,” I said, and rolled over.

“Will you not come up on the platform and see, chérie?”

“Maybe later, mon ami,” I said, and I heard the door closing behind him after hesitating for a moment. 

Around midday, I emerged onto the platform, and drew in an appreciative breath of cool, fresh air. We were halted about half a kilometer from a small island, and I saw the skiff aground on the shore, and what must have been Captain Nemo, Pierre, and Conseil on the beach. I was mildly surprised at the Captain going ashore, but why not? It was mankind he hated, not land, and he was sure not to encounter any strangers here. Soon though, I was distracted by the magically clear, ice blue waters around the Nautilus, and its inhabitants. Despite the harsh climate, the ocean was full of life, and so was the sky. I marvelled at the giant petrels soaring above, and saw penguins shooting through the water as they hunted. It was the most alive I’d felt for near a week, and tried to take in the feeling, lest it be forgotten again. Soon though, I noticed the skiff was heading back to our ship, and I went below again. 

The next day, I was awake earlier, and my friends in the mess hall welcomed me to breakfast with palpable relief. 

“Madam, why don’t you go with the professor ashore today? Jakub says he and Andrei are taking them over in a little bit,” said Kumar in a warm voice. I squirmed a little.

“I’m not sure I’m well enough,” I tried, having feigned illness over the last week to explain my behaviour to the crew, but I’m not sure anyone had bought it. 

“I believe it would just be the professor and his manservant that are heading off for now, Madam,” said the ever-perceptive man, and I glanced at him. 

“Oh… I’ll have to see how I feel,” I said, but was already planning to go with them if that was the case. 

The ground was strewn with black, volcanic rocks, in stark contrast to the snow and ice. 

“You know, I found a pumice stone at the island once. It must have floated all the way from Iceland, for there are no closer volcanoes to the Swedish coast. Imagine that, huh!”

I chattered on cheerily, as me, Pierre, and Conseil made our way along the shore. They both smiled kindly at me, clearly also relieved at the positive change in my mood. I felt a twinge of shame at having worried them, despite my best efforts to appear normal, but it was so difficult when you start to care less and less. I would attempt to calm their worries during the day. It was no difficult task, for I didn’t have to feign enthusiasm over seeing the flocks of seals and walruses crowding the beach. They were completely fearless of us, having never before seen humans, and it was delightful to be able to get so close to them. The rocky ground wasn’t the easiest to move over, and I preferred to walk on the ice, which I was used to. Pierre seemed impressed at how effortless I made it look, while he fell several times, and eventually me and Conseil had to admonish him for his carelessness. 

“It’s lucky you’re well padded!” I said, poking his plush fur jacket, and we laughed. I’d had to open mine up, the temperature was still above zero, and with the exercise it was simply too hot. 

We spent a joyous morning studying the diverse groups of pinnipeds, of which the one I was most intrigued by was the giant elephant seal. I told the professor and Conseil, the former having to translate for the latter, that bar Cuvier’s beaked whale, they are the deepest diving mammal on the planet, even trumping the sperm whales! To explain my knowledge of this, I told them of the stuffed elephant seal at the Natural History Museum in Gothenburg. Despite its impressive size, it was smaller than its southern relatives, and the experience paled in comparison to seeing the live ones in the wild. When I mentioned the museum, Pierre suddenly stopped.

“Mon Dieu! Chérie, how foolish of me, I haven’t made the connection before. I must ask - have you seen the whale? What a marvel, to preserve such a large animal!” he exclaimed, and at first I only blinked at him in confusion, before understanding what he was talking about. My home town boasts of owning the only taxidermied blue whale in the world, still in my day, and it had indeed been there for some 150 years. My face lit up in a bright smile.

“Oh, the blue whale! Yes I have! I’ve even been inside it,” I told him happily. Yes, you read that right. Those sadistic bastards mounting it furnished the inside of the poor whale with a tea salon. 

“Incroyable… What a feat! And to think, you’ve seen it. You’ve been inside a whale! Like Jonas! I should very much like to see it as well, some day,” said Pierre with a look of wonder. 

“Then we must go together!” I smiled, before I could stop myself. He paused, and looked at me. My smile faded as I read his thoughts.

“Do you mean it, chérie? Nothing would make me happier, but…” he said, his voice fading, but I understood what he was asking, of course. I felt a knot in my stomach, and turned away. 

“I don’t know yet, mon ami,” I said, my voice bitter as I remembered the full extent of my reasons for unhappiness.

“You are having some doubts? That is why you’ve been so withdrawn?” he asked gently from behind me, and I closed my eyes with a sigh. 

“I don’t know yet. We’ll have to content ourselves with the live whales for now, regardless,” I said, and started walking again. We headed back to the landing spot in silence, and the knot in my gut tightened further as I spotted Captain Nemo standing on the beach. He paid us no attention, for it was all focused on the northern horizon, where he hoped the sun would appear to confirm we were at the South Pole. I wanted to tell him he was some 500km off, since there was no coastline anywhere near the Pole, but couldn’t muster the energy. Besides, maybe it wasn’t true. Maybe the Earth’s axis was angled differently in this time, or universe. What the fuck did I care though? Wouldn’t change anything anyway… Pierre and Conseil continued walking over to the Captain, but I went off down to the water. The morning had been a nice respite from the looming depression, but a respite only. I sat down to watch the seals again. The ones nearest I recognised as Antarctic fur seals, the smallest of the continents kind. Some penguins waddled among them, and the air smelled of the animals’ presence. I didn’t find it unpleasant, but comforting, in the same way the smell of a farm is comforting. I missed animals something fiercely. Dogs, cats, horses, any kind of animal really. Sometimes their company is far superior to that of people. 

As I was deep in these morose thoughts, I felt something at my side. I startled at first, but calmed at once when I saw a large seal pup next to me. Its inquisitive face confirmed, as their behavior had all day, that it had indeed never seen a human before. It looked almost like a pug, and I smiled at it.

“Hello, friend,” I said in the silly voice I couldn’t help but use with any animal. It continued looking at me, and stretched its fat little neck to sniff me. I was most flattered when it decided it liked what I smelled like, and scooted closer. I couldn’t help but give it a stroke over the head. It withdrew at first, but then leapt up and pushed me down onto the ground. I was laughing as it scooted all the way up on top of me, and I was glad it wasn’t any bigger, or I couldn’t have drawn a breath. The pup stretched its face up to mine, and its whiskers tickled something fiercely. I laughed even harder, fully wheezing, which seemed to intrigue the seal. I pet it gently, stroking its chubby body, and it closed its kind eyes as I scratched its head. It looked to be smiling, squinting in pleasure, and my heart swelled for this sweet creature. I stretched my neck up to give it a kiss on the little black nose. It blinked at me in surprise, before closing its eyes again as I continued to pet it. After a good ten minutes, my back was sore from the rocky ground, and my arms tired from petting the seal non-stop. I carefully rolled to the side, letting it scoot off, and it looked at me in indignation. How dare I stop? I sat up, laughing at its adorable little face, and continued petting it with a sigh. The seal closed its eyes and smiled in a smug way, as if it realised it had me wrapped around its flipper. I laughed again at seeing this, but was interrupted. 

“Making friends?” came a voice from behind me, and I closed my eyes, gathering strength. 

“Wherever I go, it seems,” I said in a sarcastic tone of voice.

“Perhaps we could bring it with us, keep it as a pet. Would you like that?” asked Captain Nemo, attempting a light tone. 

“No thanks, I wouldn’t recommend that existence to anyone," I sneered, turning around to him, but regretted my words instantly when I saw they had hurt him. Was I really so wholly incapable at being angry with him, no matter how deserved it was? In truth, by now I was angrier with myself over my lack of self-respect than by anything he had done, which further fuelled my anger. Still, he should be able to take one well deserved comment without me rushing to apologise straight away. But could I watch him do so? God, I was pathetic. Attempting some semblance of resolve, I turned away from him again. My facial expression must have told him enough of my feelings, for he stayed for a long moment, perhaps waiting for my resolve to waver, but I managed to keep it up until I heard his footsteps walking away. I breathed out in a deep sigh, and laid back on the rocky beach again, while I continued petting the little seal. 

Before long, I watched the Captain go back to the Nautilus. Pierre and Conseil were walking along the beach, carefully studying all its marvels, while I stayed with the seal for a good while. When it finally had enough of me, it unceremoniously left me to scoot down into the sea. I laughed a little as I watched it flop away on its belly, before I joined my friends. I horrified Pierre on several occasions as I plunged my hands into the shallow, icy water to retrieve some seashell or other, but he admitted it had been worth it as I handed him a scallop shell he did not immediately recognise. He and Conseil attempted to classify it, and I told them to name it after me if they were unable to. We were picked up again before dinnertime, but the lightness I had felt ashore disappeared as I was once again enclosed in the Nautilus’s interior. 

On March 21st, as the last sunlight graced these polar regions before the endless twilight took over, I was sitting alone up on the platform, taking it all in. It was an alien landscape, even to me, and the light no longer looked familiar. I’d never been far north enough to experience the polar night, and had never imagined my first one would take place in the southern hemisphere. I had only decided to come up here once the coast was clear, so to say, and the skiff had taken Captain Nemo to shore. He must be pleased that he would finally be able to take his measurements, but I still believed he would be disappointed with what they told him. Well, not my problem. I watched in amazement as a humpback whale leapt out of the water, only a few hundred meters away, and the smell in the cold air told me there were more whales nearby. Indeed, a spout from a blowhole could be seen now and again, but I was distracted as I saw an inexplicable sight in the distance. On top of the peak rising above the shore we had landed at today, about a mile from the Nautilus, I watched as a flag flapped in the wind. I frowned, and tried to focus my gaze on it. How on Earth had it ended up there? Even if we weren’t at the South Pole, this was still the furthest south anyone had gone so far in history. I understood where it came from though, when my eyes were just about able to make out a golden letter ‘N’ on the black background. But more questions arose from this answer. If Captain Nemo had put it there, did it mean he claimed this land for himself? Or was it simply a message for whichever explorer came after him, that they weren’t the first? If the former guess was correct, I supposed he would be happy to know it would remain uninhabited and unspoilt for the next century and a half at least, apart from a research station here and there. I didn’t think he would object to that, though. As the stars started appearing overhead, these constellations unknown to me, I saw the skiff heading back, and I reluctantly went downstairs to avoid meeting the Captain. Pierre would have to tell me the result of their survey later. 

Chapter Text

The air was knocked out of me. I fought to breathe in while blinking in confusion. I was laying on my back, on the floor of my cabin. Had I fallen out of bed in the fit of some nightmare? But I remembered no dream whatsoever. I sat up, rubbing the back of my head. I must have hit it when I fell. I looked around, and at first worried my head had taken a serious hit, as everything looked strangely askew. But no, after a few moments longer, I managed to stand up fine. I did not have a concussion, it was the Nautilus that was leaning to starboard. Were we landed on the bottom then? But Captain Nemo always balanced the ballast tanks so that we didn’t lean, even when laying on the seafloor. No, something was off. I threw my clothes on and rushed into the corridor. I heard voices shouting throughout the ship and footsteps hurrying along, but none of them coming my way. With growing anxiety, I wondered if anyone had been seriously hurt, my first thoughts being of Pierre and Captain Nemo. I rushed towards their staterooms, and met Conseil and Ned Land in the dining room, coming in from the opposite door. 

“You alright?” asked Ned, and I nodded to him, assessing they were both unharmed as well. We hurried along together, since they were clearly on the same mission as myself, at least half of it. We almost ran straight into Pierre as we flung the door to the lounge open. I threw my arms around him with a cry of relief. 

“Je vais bien, ma chérie,” he whispered into my hair as he hugged me tightly. 

“Qu’y a-t-il?” asked Ned. I let go of Pierre, and rushed over to Captain Nemo’s door. It was the first time I had ever knocked on it, but I did so without hesitation, sick with worry. There was no answer, and I resolutely pushed the handle down. The room was empty, the bed had not been slept in. So he must be elsewhere. Hopefully safe. My companions were as eager to find him as I was, although not all of us for the same reason, I suspected. We did not find him anywhere between the lounge and the central companionway, even opening the door down to the floor below, but it seemed deserted. All sounds of the shouts and footsteps had ceased. Pierre concluded that Captain Nemo must be in the pilothouse, and said it was best to go back to the salon and wait. I could not, and went up the steps to check, against his advice. My friends stayed behind, but when I returned and shook my head, the pilothouse had been empty, they went back to wait in the lounge. I still refused to go with them, instead hurrying downstairs to the mess hall. I pushed the door open in a fervor, and to my great relief the room was filled with the whole crew. They were all busy in discussion, and taking care of the few injuries incurred by the accident. My eyes instantly fell to the Captain, walking around and taking account of them, but he stopped when he saw me. Quickly making his way over, he reached for my hands. I took his without second thought.

“Eleonora. Are you unharmed?” he asked in a grave voice. I nodded, and the relief on his face was palpable. 

“And the professor? Have you seen him?” was his next question, still with worry in his voice. I couldn’t help but soften at his genuine concern, and squeezed his hands. 

“Yes, he’s fine. We all are. What about down here? Any serious injuries?” I asked, looking around the room. I tried to search for my dearest friends, Kumar, Jakub, William, and the others I had spent the most time with. 

“None, thank God,” Captain Nemo answered, and with that confirmed, I let go of his hands. I cleared my throat, remembering I was actually avoiding him, and said in a much more formal tone;

“I’m glad to hear it. Let me know if there is anything I can assist with.” I could wait for the explanation of what had happened, now that I knew everyone was safe. With those words, I turned around, and went back to my companions in the lounge. 

“Un incident, Capitaine?” asked the professor. Captain Nemo bore an unusual expression of uneasiness, and although I could not understand every word of their conversation, I gathered enough to know that we were in a potentially serious situation. The Nautilus was rising, and before long, righted itself to its normal position, but the Captain seemed worried still as he left us. Pierre explained to me what had happened with the toppling iceberg, and that it had indeed been a close call, but that we would be fine. Ned huffed at this, and I had to agree with him. I wasn’t so sure we were in the clear yet. The panels then opened, and we were met by dazzling beacon light, multiplied in bright rainbow colours through the masses of ice. No matter the situation, this sight would have been enough to offer distraction under any circumstances. Conseil and Pierre expressed their wonderment, and even Ned had to concede. We had to look away from it once we started moving though, the ice crystals blinding to our eyes at this speed, before the panels closed again. At five in the morning, two hours after the collision, we felt a small jolt. The bow had struck the ice. Pierre assured me that it must have been a faulty maneuver, but he was as always completely unable to tell a lie, his nervosity easily betrayed by his overly light tone of voice. It would not have mattered, I was sure Captain Nemo was steering his Nautilus himself under these conditions, and such a thing as ‘faulty maneuver’ did not exist in his vocabulary. I stayed silent, my suspicions would help no one, but they were confirmed as we started reversing. After a while, Pierre could no longer stay seated, and started pacing, before moving into the library. Conseil was sitting further away, looking unbothered as ever. I looked over at Ned, and he looked back with a serious expression on his face. He did not try to shield me from the truth of our situation like Pierre, and I thought for a moment that he was perhaps the man onboard who treated me with the most respect. Or rather, who treated me no differently because I was a women. 

“What’s the biggest whale you’ve ever caught, Ned?” I asked after a second. He looked surprised at first, but realised we were both badly in need of some distraction.

“Seventy-footer, a cachalot outside Newfoundland. Took us for one hell of a sleighride, that one, but I got him,” he smirked. “Got over a hundred barrels from that one beast. I damn near thought Captain Morin was gonna go down on me right there on deck.” 

I laughed out loud, and he looked pleased to have successfully distracted me. 

“I declined of course, but he did kiss me square on the mouth, and paid me a handsome bonus when we got back home,” he laughed. 

“Oh, I can imagine! What did you do with the bonus?” I asked, desperately wanting him to continue talking. 

“Bought a couple rounds for the crew, got a new pair of boots, then I gave the rest to Ellen. Figured she’d make better use of it than I would,” he shrugged. I knew he loved his little sister dearly, her family being the only one he had left, and I smiled sympathetically. 

“She must miss you. Just think of all you can tell her and the little ones when you return! You’ll be more famous than ever. The King of Harpooners, risen from the dead like Lazarus,” I said, trying to comfort him, but he only scoffed. 

“More like ‘buried under the ice bank until Reckoning Day’,” he said, and my heart sank. This couldn’t be the end? Our adventure had only just started. What would even happen to me, if we did die? Would I simply wake up in my own time, as if from a dream? Somehow, that possibility scared me more than any other. To be parted from Captain Nemo, and everyone else onboard the Nautilus, separated from all I had come to love, by centuries… I shuddered suddenly, trying to push away the feelings of nausea, and told Ned firmly;

“Nonsense. You may not like him, but Captain Nemo can bend nature to his will, as you know, and will get us out of here.” He better, since it was through his injudiciousness we’d been put in this situation in the first place. 

For three and a half hours we travelled backwards at a frightful speed through the tunnel, me and my friends saying very little to each other, before the stern too hit a wall of ice. I felt the chills of panic trickling down my spine, and grabbed for Pierre’s hand. He, in turn, took Conseil's hand, as I reached for Ned. And so, we were all stood together, trying to face the dire situation ahead, when Captain Nemo reentered the lounge. His calmness gave me pause. Had he already thought of a way to free us? Pierre, ever the diplomat, went over to him.

“La route est barrée au sud?” he asked him.

“Oui, monsieur. L’iceberg en se retournant a fermé toute issue,” answered Nemo as if they were simply discussing the weather.

“Nous sommes bloqués?” Pierre breathed, waiting for confirmation of what we already knew to be the truth.

“Oui,” he said, delivering these devastating news with the same emotionlessness. Ned let go of my hand, and banged a table with his fist in fury. I could understand him, for I too felt enraged at Nemo in that moment. How dare he speak of our demise so casually? He himself seemed either clueless or unbothered by our upset, for he continued calmly;

“Messieurs, il y a deux manières de mourir dans les conditions où nous sommes.” He glanced at me, surely not anticipating how far my French had progressed by now, since he didn’t address me. I didn’t correct him yet, I preferred to hear the honest truth, rather than some PG version deemed safe for ladies. I got my wish, since the Captain went on to describe how we would die of either crushing or asphyxiation, the latter being our foremost concern, unless we managed to free ourselves from the ice within forty-eight hours. I listened in a state of sudden pragmatic calm, a state I had found myself in before in the face of actual danger. I was thankful for it, there was no time for one of my pathetic anxiety attacks at the moment. As Captain Nemo was about to leave to commence the borings outside, not having bothered to give me any version at all, I put my cards on the table.

“Espérons que cela fonctionne. Pour votre bien,” I told him, raising my eyebrows. If he was surprised at me having understood him, or insulted by my tone, he made no showing of it, but left without another word. 

Chapter Text

I watched through the now open panels as the men outside, Ned among them, started taking measurements of the walls and floor of the tunnel imprisoning the Nautilus. They worked in teams of two to screw the long bores into the ice, and when they found that they were able to fully penetrate surface beneath us, I breathed out in relief. We would be fine. Me, Pierre and Conseil observed as Captain Nemo had an area, the size of the Nautilus’s circumference, outlined beside where it was landed. But then my eyebrows furrowed in confusion. The bores were laid aside, and the crew instead took up pick axes and started digging a trench. I turned to Pierre.

“Why aren’t they using the bores?” I asked him, perplexed. Was there something I’d missed? He looked back at me in astonishment. 

“Uh… je ne sais pas, chérie,” he said after a moment, and we stared at one another, as he read my thoughts.

“It should work, right?” I asked, still unsure if such a simple solution could have been overlooked by the brilliant Captain. Pierre nodded slowly, realising at the same time as me that we must intervene. 

“Help me put on the diving suit!” I exclaimed, and we wasted no time. I don’t know if Conseil had caught enough to understand the exact plan, but the urgency couldn’t be doubted, and he followed along as well. 

I marched straight up to Captain Nemo, some crewmen understandably pausing their digging for a moment to look at me. I grabbed his shoulder, and he turned around. It was impossible to see his face, the glass pane of the diving helmet being a perfect mirror in the bright light, but I imagined he was annoyed at me interrupting him. I gestured to the pile of bores laid to the side, but his body language told me it was not enough to explain my meaning. I gestured to the bottom hatch leading back inside, but he shook his head, pointing to the trench, and went back to digging. I groaned in exasperation, and grabbed his shoulder again. I did not need to see his facial expression for him to convey his frustration. This time, I instead pointed to the lounge window, where we could just about make out Pierre and Conseil mouthing and gesturing wildly for him to come inside. Seeing as it was now two trustworthy men ushering him, rather than some tedious woman, he finally gave in. We hurried back to the hatch as fast as possible underwater, and was soon back onboard. My accomplices met us as the diving chamber emptied, helping us off with the helmets. Captain Nemo wasted no time.

“What?” he asked in a curt tone, with an underlaying meaning of ‘this better be good’. 

“Why aren’t you using the bores?” I asked fervently. He stared at me, in disbelief that I’d disrupted his important work to ask such a stupid question, but managed to stop himself from saying what he most likely wanted to. 

“What do you mean? We already did,” he said, beyond irritated, and I was sure it was only thanks to Pierre backing me up that he was still hearing me out.

“If you use the bores to drill holes around the circumference, rather than digging it out, it will be much quicker,” I explained, my tone more pleading than convincing. I thought for a second I would be dismissed again, but Captain Nemo was listening intently now, and I continued;

“I understand the first ones will probably freeze back up before you get the whole way around, but if you start at even distances the structural integrity of the ice should still be sufficiently compromised for the Nautilus to break through if you filled the ballast tanks!” He thought it over for a moment, his frown easing. 

“If we were able to halt the freezing somehow…” he muttered, thinking out loud. His expression changed to and fro as he went over different ideas in his head. 

“Boiling water!” he then mumbled.

“Boiling water?” asked Pierre. 

“Yes, sir. We’re shut up in a relatively confined area. If the Nautilus’s pumps were to shoot continual streams of boiling water into this space, wouldn’t that raise its temperature and delay its freezing?” the Captain said, his voice full of equal parts doubt and hope. 

“It should work,” I said, in the same tone of voice.

“Espérons que cela fonctionne. Pour mon bien,” he told me softly, his eyes gleaming. The change in his gaze gave me pause, but I had no time to analyse it further, before he continued in a rushed voice.

“Eleonora, you’re dressed already. Go back out and fetch the men to regroup. Have them bring the picks with them, hopefully they won’t be needed again. Professor, help me out of the suit.” I had time to see Pierre gulp before I put my helmet back on. This was perhaps not the way he’d hoped the Captain would ask him to help get undressed for the first time. 

Some six hours later, mid afternoon, everyone was coming back onboard as we readied for what we all hoped would be our departure. I had been overseeing the work from the lounge window, after having left the particulars of my plan to Captain Nemo. I was sure he would have figured out the minimal amount of holes needed to be drilled for us to break through, since drilling more than necessary meant the initial ones would be given more time to freeze up. I’d been sure of what I said though, even if they did freeze up completely the ice would not be as bearing as before. As every Swede does, I knew ice, and I knew once a hole had been drilled, even after freezing back up completely, the ice remembers it. I think the Captain’s idea of the boiling water must have helped though, for it seemed none of the holes were fully frozen up yet. The drilling finished, and the Nautilus carefully towed in position right above the trench, I rushed back to the entrance of the diving chamber when I saw that the work was done. I watched as the crew that had remained onboard expertly helped their comrades out of the diving suits, all sweaty and huffing from the exertion. You can imagine how anxious I was when I tell you I barely took notice of their state. 

“Are we ready for departure, Captain?” I asked as soon as he was free of the suit, and he nodded.

“Come with me,” he said, before leaving for the pilot house. Even in the face of our potential demise, his words made my heart skip a beat, but I did not hesitate to do as he said. He uttered a few words to Kumar in passing, who nodded, and started shouting orders to the crew. The pilot house was empty, and the Captain took the helm. 

“Pull down that lever there,” he told me, pointing to what can best be described as a dashboard, with buttons and navigational instruments, and the lever in question. I blinked once, then hurried to do as he said. We listened as the pumps worked to fill the ballast tanks, and the minutes passed by with excruciating languidity. The only other sound to be heard was my quick breathing and matching heartbeat. The Captain was as calm and collected as always. After what felt like hours, but what must have been less than five minutes, the first sonorous, otherworldly sound of the ice cracking could be heard. I met the Captain’s eyes with pensive hopefulness, and as another, louder, crystalline crack rang out, his face lit up in a triumphant smile. The sound of the cracks, to modern ears best belonging in a sci-fi movie, increased in frequency, and we felt the first jolt. It was working. We were breaking through. I turned to look outside, in wide-eyed wonder, and felt my stomach jump as if on a rollercoaster as the definitive crack was heard, followed by us plunging downwards through the trench, taking the massive block of ice with us. The sight of the open water stretching out underneath the ice bank felt like seeing heaven itself, and I let out a cry of triumph. 

“Push the lever back!” exclaimed Captain Nemo, and I did so. He was laughing, and I turned to him with a beaming smile. He returned it, and his eyes were full of so much emotion I almost forgot all about our imprisonment and liberation. He looked at me with admiration, disbelief, triumph, and… and love. I felt taken aback, staring at him, but there was no mistaking it. It seemed as though there was a shortage of air in the room all of a sudden, I could scarcely take a breath. Just then, the door was flung open, and Kumar stepped into the room. He took one look outside the window, saw the open depths of water, and turned around. With his great, bellowing voice, he shouted two words in Nautilese, and they were met by thunderous cheering from below. I glanced over to the Captain one last time, feeling shaken by what I’d seen, before stepping out of the room. Standing on the landing above the central companionway, I was met by the beaming faces of the whole crew, and even louder shouting. Kumar grabbed me by the shoulders, and shook me lightly in enthusiasm, before ushering me down the steps. I did not even reach the bottom of the stairs before I was lifted into the air by the crowd, they threw me up again and again, chanting my name. I was shrieking with glee, celebrating with them the fact of our survival, and filled with complete euphoria. They set me down, and I had no time to notice my dizziness as they all crowded around to shake my hands, dunk my back, and convey their sincerest gratitude.

Chapter Text

“Ren Eleonora, ver Rani is!” Kumar proclaimed, and all raised their glasses in ardent cheers. I had been forced to remain seated for the toast, and I was now blushing profusely at the excessive gratitude they were showing me. I’d had time to meet Pierre and the others in between our escape from the ice, and the dinner in the mess hall, and they’d not been any better, apart from maybe Conseil, who’d faced the whole ordeal with the same calm he faced any other challenge. Ned had been beside himself with joy, his hope of returning to civilisation reignited, and had lifted me up and spun me around, before kissing me square on the mouth. I blinked at him, but Ned only shrugged.

“Sorry, professor, it couldn’t be helped this time!” 

I think Pierre must have forgotten that he should have been upset at this, for he only laughed, and took my hands. 

“You are a genius, chérie, a genius! You have saved us all!” he exclaimed, and kissed both my hands. So, after all this, the celebration in the mess hall proved too much even for my need for attention. I tried to thank the crew for their kind gesture, in a way that let them now it was quite sufficient by now. I still had not dared meet Captain Nemo’s eyes once since what I’d seen in them in the pilot house, but I had been made to sit at the head of one of the tables, and he was to my right, so it was no easy task to avoid them. Kumar was to my left, the rest of my closest friends down along both sides of the long table. They were now finally taking their seats again, and I could relax somewhat. 

“That better not mean ‘Ice Queen’,” I told Kumar sternly, and he gave a bellowing laugh, with the rest of the table. I put my head in my hands. ‘Great’, I thought, ‘just what I needed’. Spirits were high among the crew as we had dinner all together, with a few exceptions. Javier and some others were needed to steer us the final stretch to safety, out from under the ice bank. I found it hard to enjoy the meal though. Now that the euphoria of our liberation had worn off, my thoughts were swirling around like a whirlwind in my mind. Logic made me doubt what I had seen, but I could not refute my memory of Captain Nemo’s gaze. What was worse, I couldn’t decide what I wanted to be true. After so many months of admiring him, loving him, and ignoring anything that went against my feelings, the events since the slaughter of the whales had for the first time made me doubt if I was right to trust him so wholly as I had. I could not forget the fact that he had put us through this ordeal under the ice, and for what? His reasons were as inexplicable to me as ever. Every one of his injudicious actions were piling up in my head, I was unable to stop the onslaught. Drugging me and my friends, keeping us imprisoned aboard the Nautilus for life, grounding us in the coral sea, electrocuting the Papuans, throwing Ned in the brig for a comment he instantly regretted, diving to the seafloor in the Atlantic, going to the South Pole… The list could be made long, and I shuddered to think of the consequences if my plan today hadn’t worked. I could not finish my food, and went to take the plate away. The crew were still chatting away happily, toasting and congratulating me as I walked through the mess hall, but the sound of their voices seemed distant. When I came back to the table, I did not sit down. 

“Thank you for your company this evening, gentlemen. I must bid you goodnight,” I said, not really meeting their eyes as they quieted in confusion. I knew they had been gearing up for a proper celebration, but I could think of nothing worse at the moment. I just wanted to sleep, to have a few hours of blissful unconsciousness. 

“Are you feeling unwell, priya?” asked Kumar with a concerned frown. 

“No, no, I’m fine, thank you. I’m just tired,” I hastened to assure him, and turned around to leave, but was stopped by Captain Nemo’s voice.

“May I escort you to your cabin, miss?” I closed my eyes with a sigh. So there was one worse option than a party. They way he’d phrased it, I couldn’t think of any reason to decline, without causing a scene.

“Thank you, Captain,” I said over my shoulder, and started walking without waiting for him. I heard him rising, and follow me. He caught up to me in the corridor, and offered me his arm. It felt like a punch to my gut, but I just had to get back to my cabin as quickly as possible without any disruption, so I took it. I didn’t say a word, and we walked too slowly for my liking. I focused intently on not feeling a thing, that would have to wait. ‘Just have to get back to my cabin’. Despite my efforts, my stomach was tightening, and I furrowed my brows in concentration. 

“Are you sure you’re feeling quite well?” asked the Captain, his tone concerned too. 

“I’m perfectly fine,” I answered without looking at him, but my voice came out barely more than a whisper. I just needed to get back to my cabin. He didn’t question me further, until we were almost there. Almost there. I would be able to close the door, and let out my feelings in solitude. If I could just get back to my cabin. I reached for the door, but Captain Nemo stopped me. I felt my stomach tightening further. 

“Eleonora, please, what’s the matter?” 

I still would not look at him. Why was I not allowed to just go to my cabin? I was sure I would lose my composure if I spoke now. When I did not answer, he put his fingers under my chin, and tilted my face up to force me to look at him. He studied me for a moment, and I watched as he was taken aback by what he saw. I don’t know exactly how much of my hopelessness and disappointment was reflected in my eyes, but clearly enough for him to grasp the magnitude of my feelings. He fought to make sense of them, and let me go. I turned around, and reached for my salvation again, but was not granted it. Before I could close the door behind me, the Captain grabbed it. I backed into the room as he stepped in, and I felt like a wounded animal, cornered by my pursuer. The hurt on his face over my reaction was too much to bear, and I cast my eyes down to the floor. He said nothing for a moment, before speaking up, anguish and confusion in his voice;

“What has happened? Why aren’t you happy? Had it not been for you quick thinking, who knows how long we would have been imprisoned! You may have saved us all today, Eleonora, and I promise you we will not forget it. Do you not want to celebrate you triumph?" 

I sank down onto the bed. He did not understand. This was too much. I could not face him under these circumstances. The moment I looked at him, I saw my hope and dreams crushed, replaced by disillusions, so I put my head into my hands again. I heard him come to kneel before me, and in my despicable weakness I wanted nothing more than for him to embrace me, to let me forget all my troubles, to let me breathe freely again. He did not, and I can’t tell you if I was more relieved or devastated. I took a shaky breath, and finally looked up at him. 

“I am grateful that I was able to help, but why did I have to, Captain? Why would you have put us at such risk? To lay claim to a land of uninhabitable ice? What for? What if we had not been able to free ourselves today? Would it have been worth it still?” I asked, in a barely restrained voice, as I desperately waited for him to redeem himself somehow. Rather than answer my questions, he put one forward himself, after a long moment of contemplation.

“You no longer trust me?” 

His voice was quiet, but thick with emotion, and his eyes pleading. Oh God, how could I find the strength to tell him the truth? And yet, if I never did, how could I go on? I would come to despise myself eventually, for laying aside all my morals and all I held sacred for this man. 

“No, Captain, not as I did,” I whispered, and I could not tell into whose heart I had driven the dagger with these words. His eyes filled with tears, and he stared up at me. His expression bore a pain I had never seen before, there was none of the usual fire in his eyes, and none of the will to appear calm and collected. He sat back on the floor, and leant against the wardrobe behind him. He looked utterly defeated. I wanted to throw myself on the floor with him, caress his hair, hold him close to my heart, anything to take his pain away. But I did not. I knew that if I gave in now, there was no hope of him ever respecting my words, for they would have no meaning behind them. We were sat in silence for a long while, neither of us knowing how to break it. Finally, Captain Nemo arose, and left the room with heavy steps.

Chapter Text

A week passed by in a haze after this. None of us saw Captain Nemo. Kumar would come into the lounge and report our position, and speak kindly to me. I replied to him, and to all my other friends, but would initiate no conversations myself. I was again sleeping for long hours every day, and only went down to the mess hall for a reluctant evening meal. I no longer cared if people worried about me, for I had no energy left to care about anything. I felt as one of the patients in the film Awakenings, in the way I could only be roused by the actions of another. There was no will left in me. Pierre came and fetched me from my cabin every day, or I would have stayed in bed. I politely looked at the plants and animals he would point out to me through the lounge windows, but cared not what we saw. What did it matter? ‘Do you no longer trust me’, the Captain had asked, and I had told him the truth. How could I, now that my eyes were open? I had been beyond naive not to believe him the many times he’d tried to warn me. ‘Even good men are capable of evil’. His words kept ringing in my ears as soon as I tried to form a thought of anything else, hence why I had resolved to stop thinking all together. Another week passed, with no change. Pierre would usher me up onto the platform with him, to ‘get some fresh air, it will do you good’, and I would obediently come along. The change made no difference to me, but if it made him feel he was helping me, I didn’t mind. Not that I minded much of anything these days. 

Yet another week would pass before I saw Captain Nemo again. On April 12th, outside the mouth of the Amazon river, I had been made to go up onto the platform with my companions. The weather was hot and balmy, and I felt nowhere near as comfortable as I had in the polar regions. A welcome distraction came in the form of a flock of manatees, peacefully grazing the underwater bed of grass, but as several crewmen emerged with rifles to hunt them, I left without a word. I was sitting in the lounge alone for several hours before Pierre came in. He came to sit next to me, and told me of how the crew had used suckerfish to hunt sea turtles, ‘an excellent addition to our larder’. 

“How curious,” I said, not managing any tone but apathy in my voice. Pierre was about to start noting this practice down in his journal, when the library door flung open, revealing Captain Nemo. I felt my heart jump, the closest thing to an emotion I had felt these past three weeks, and me and Pierre both stared at him. 

“Professeur, s'il vous plaît! J'ai besoin de votre aide!” he exclaimed in a fervor. Suddenly, I was alive again, and arose with Pierre without question. We followed Captain Nemo down the gangways in a frightful rush. In a frantic voice, he was explaining to us that one of his men had had a shock from an electric rifle that had malfunctioned, and was now unconscious in the armory. As we got in there, the other crewmen moved for the professor, who was on his knees next to the lifeless body in seconds. I pushed my way through after him, and recognised the man on the floor. It was Oskar! I watched in breathless anticipation with the rest of the room as Pierre grabbed his wrist, and put his eye to Oskar’s mouth. After ten long seconds, the professor sat up, and sighed heavily. He turned to the Captain, despair on his face, and shook his head. Captain Nemo swallowed hard, and crossed his arms, tears already filling his eyes. The room quieted as the crew struggled to take in this sudden, devastating loss of their comrade. I turned to look between the Captain and Pierre in desperation. I spent exactly five seconds contemplating my options, my mind now awake and alert, as I realised I was capable of action. I decided there was only one way to go. I refused to just stand by when I might save Oskar, even if it meant dealing with the questions that would inevitably arise. I would pay the price, if it meant he might live. I rushed forward, sinking down opposite Pierre, and pushed the poor man out of the way.

“Move!” 

I started the chest compressions, using my whole upper body strength, not caring if I broke ribs, just as I’d been taught. Several moments passed, before anyone managed to break free from their shock, when several voices started loudly questioning me. I didn’t understand every word, but it wasn’t hard to figure out the gist of what they were saying. Someone grabbed my shoulder to pull me away, but I yanked free and continued at the same pace. I heard more men approaching, when suddenly the Captain’s voice rang out. He spoke in Nautilese, and must have ordered the crew to leave me be, for I was allowed to continue. After thirty compressions, I pushed Oskar’s head back, and breathed deeply into his mouth, before continuing. Another stunned silence filled the room. Pierre, who’d stayed on his knees opposite me the whole time, watching in absolute wonder, was joined by Captain Nemo.

“Eleonora, what are you doing?!” he asked, bewildered, but not angry.

“Saving him! Or trying to,” I replied, my breathing getting heavy from the exertion, hair hanging in my face, and starting to stick to the beads of sweat forming. The Captain didn’t question my method, seeming to catch on, and instead asked in an urgent voice;

“What do you need?” 

“Unfortunately, this is about all we can do, it’s not like we have a defib…” my voice trailed off. All a defibrillator is, is two electrodes delivering voltage to either side of the heart muscle. I stopped to administer a breath, having done another thirty compressions. We had plenty of electrical charge onboard, the only issue was how to administer it. There was no time to rig something up, just explaining what I needed and why would take too long. A mad idea crossed my mind, but there was nothing to lose. Well, nothing for Oskar, at least.

“Captain, how much voltage is in the rifles?” I asked in a rushed tone.

“Up to fifteen hundred volts. Why?” he said, confusion in his voice.

“Good, load up two of them at six hundred volts each!” 

His eyes widened in absolute disbelief.

“Are you mad, woman, what for?! They’re why he’s dead in the first place!”

“Well, then he’s not gonna get any deader, is he?” I said sarcastically, my breathing heavy. He stared at me, stunned, but something in my eyes must have told him to trust me, for I understood he told his men in their language to do what I’d said. His eyes never left me. Before the rifles were ready, another thirty compressions passed, and I breathed deeply into Oskar’s lungs. The Captain was watching me the whole time. His men told him the rifles were ready, and he asked me;

“Now what?” 

I stopped the compressions for a second, and ripped open Oskar’s shirt, to the sound of more shocked exclamations from the crew. I barely took notice of them.

“Captain, take over the chest compressions.” 

He did, and I did not have to tell him to do it with enough force, he had realised what they were supposed to do. Turning to the two crewmen with the rifles, I pointed to one of them;

“Dinesh,” then at one side of Oskar’s chest, “here. And Nabin, here! Understood?” 

They nodded, fear written on their faces.

“Captain, be ready to move. One, two, three!” 

I counted down using my fingers. As soon as the electric bullets hit, Oskar’s body spasmed, and several terrified gasps could be heard from the crew, but he was not revived. Captain Nemo’s eyes were burning with pensive, disbelieving hope. I bent down to breathe into Oskar’s lungs again, then gave Captain Nemo a que to continue as well. 

“Increase the voltage to eight hundred in each rifle, Captain,” I commanded, and he listened without protest, and gave the order, all while continuing the compressions. After carefully counting down the two minutes needed, not forgetting to administer the breaths, I gave the signal.

“Again!” 

Dinesh and Nabin were ready, and I counted down. This time, after Oskar’s body spasmed, he took a gurgling breath. The room quieted down to an eerie level, everyone still as statues, and then Oskar gave a weak cough. I started patting his face, frantically calling him. 

“Oskar? Oskar! Hör du mig?” Oskar slowly opened his eyes, and blinked.

Chapter Text

As I came into the mess hall that night, the room silenced. Every face there turned to look at me, their expressions ranging from wonderment, to disbelief, to genuine horror. I quickly cast my eyes down, and walked over to the buffet, not taking any notice of what was there. I filled a plate, all while the room remained dead silent, and then took it with me to my cabin. The food would remain largely untouched, as I contemplated when the inevitable burning of the witch would take place. 

After Oskar had been carried away to his cabin, me having given what little instructions of his care I could, I arose on stiff legs. The room was still quiet, the crewmen stared at me with a mix of dread and reverence. I looked at Pierre, who bore the same expression, then at the Captain. Never before had I seen him concentrate the full power of his penetrating gaze like he did on me now. No one uttered a word, and I suddenly felt exhausted. I wiped the sweat from my brow with a deep sigh, then left the room, my heavy footsteps the only sound to be heard. 

A knock on my door roused me from my imaginings of burning at the stake. 

“Come in,” I said in a tired voice. Pierre’s face appeared, carefully looking in, and his expression was now wary, and concerned. When I saw it, my eyes filled with tears. Would he too shun me out of fear? Somehow, this would be more unbearable than all else. I relied on him so completely to comfort me, take care of me, and shield me from my thoughts. But I was wrong, thank the heavens. Before I knew it, I was in his arms, sobbing, and he stroked my hair, gently shushing me. He led us to the bed, and we sat there for a long time, until finally I calmed down. As always, he never put any demands on me, but let me do everything at my own pace. I knew he must be dying to ask me the question - how did I know all that I did? - but he would wait until I was ready to tell him. That would not be today, or for a long time still. Instead, when I spoke up, it was to reassure myself.

“You’re not scared of me?” I asked in a pathetically weak voice. 

“Non, chérie, I am in awe. When I called you a remarkable woman, I did not expect my words to prove so insufficient,” he answered after a moment. I huffed a little.

“You don’t think me a witch then?” He turned my face up to look at him.

“I am a man of science, mademoiselle. I don’t scare so easily,” he said with a small smile. My eyes filled with tears again, but I smiled back at him. 

“Je t’aime,” I said simply, not knowing how else to convey my immense gratitude for his understanding. 

“Je t’aime aussi, ma chérie,” he answered, and placed a kiss on my forehead. 

“I will tell you someday, mon ami, I swear it,” I told him, and I meant it. It was the least I could do to repay him. As soon as the words escaped me, I realised who I sounded like, and felt a twinge of sympathy. Perhaps the Captain had reasons as good as my own ones for waiting? I only wished I was as patient and understanding as the dear professor, or that Captain Nemo hadn’t given me cause to need his answers so urgently. 

As seemed to be destined whenever we shared a bed, we were awoken by a knock at the door. In Pierre’s arms, I had been granted some rest, despite the upset of the previous day. 

“Just a second,” I called, and arose to open the door. Outside was Kumar, a teacup in hand, and a similar expression of wariness and concern that Pierre had had last night on his face. Inevitably, he could not help but notice I wasn’t alone, and I saw him quickly analysing the situation.

“Tea, Madam,” he then said, offering me the cup. 

“Forgive me, I did not know you had company,” he added, glancing at Pierre again, and I could not quite understand the look in his eyes. 

“Thank you, Kumar. That was thoughtful of you,” I said, studying him, not without some wariness on my part also. 

“A sacrificial gift to the witch?” I then added, trying to gauge his thoughts on yesterday’s events, which he had undoubtedly heard all about, as had the rest of the crew, judging from the reaction in the mess hall last night. To my great relief, he chuckled a little at my joke, and some of the tension was broken. 

“I hear I’ll be wanting you on my good side, Madam,” he said with a smile.

“You are not a superstitious man then, Kumar?” I asked, still needing confirmation I had not alienated all my friends by my reckless, but necessary, intervention. 

“Less than most Indians, priya. I am, however, a very curious man, as is the Captain. He wishes to see you at your earliest convenience,” he said with a meaning glance. I knew this was coming, there was no chance I would get away with not explaining myself, but I still had no idea what to tell any of them. I sighed in resignation.

“Where can I find him?” I asked, and Kumar gave me a sympathetic look.

“He will be in his stateroom, Madam,” he said, before bowing, and taking his leave. Great, a perfect location for another pleasant conversation with the Captain. Somehow I doubted I would come away feeling as satisfied with the outcome this time. 

After finishing the tea, and receiving an overly optimistic pep talk from Pierre, as unable to hide his true feelings as always, we headed off to the lounge. Delaying my meeting with the Captain for a moment longer, I turned to him.

“Pierre… If you haven’t already, will you refrain from sharing what happened with Ned and Conseil? I don’t need them too to view me as the crew did yesterday…” I said, almost shuddering at the memory of the looks I had been met with in the mess hall. 

“Ne t'inquiète pas, chérie. I will not tell them,” he said, taking my hands. He squeezed them in sympathy of the imminent confrontation, of which he was clearly less than jealous, and waited while I went up to Captain Nemo’s door. I took a deep breath in a vain attempt to calm my nerves, before knocking. 

“Come in,” came the reply in his deep voice, in English, for of course he knew who it must be. Exchanging a final glance with Pierre, I pressed the doorhandle down. Captain Nemo was standing up in the middle of the room, his arms crossed, his face expressionless.

“Miss Larsson, please,” he said, gesturing to a chair. I took the seat, trying to ignore how uncomfortable I was feeling, and clasped my hands in my knee. Neither of us spoke up for a long while, my discomfort growing by the second.

“I trust you slept well?” he asked, finally breaking the silence.

“Yes, thank you, Captain,” I answered warily. I was suspicious of his courteousness, after not speaking to him for three weeks, since our last, disastrous conversation. That is, apart from yesterday.
“The bed isn’t too cramped for two?” he asked sarcastically, and I closed my eyes. ‘There we go’, I thought, something like that was more expected.

“You know everything that goes on aboard, do you, Captain?” I smiled bitterly.

“This ship is my home, the only one I shall ever have again, and more than that, my very soul. So yes, I do know everything that goes on aboard the Nautilus,” he said curtly.

“That said, it wasn’t a far-fetched conclusion to make when Henryk found the professor’s room empty this morning,” he added, in a calmer tone than he had begun with. 

“Is that why you called me in here, to ask if my bed is too cramped to share?” I said, raising my eyebrows. For some reason, the question seemed to have hurt him, but his expression went back to its emotionless state in less than a second. He looked away, to the pictures on the wall, where I could still see the one from my birthday hanging. It seemed another lifetime, somehow more distant than my former life in the 21st century, more like a strange, blissful dream compared to my current situation. When the Captain waited too long to answer for my liking, I decided to get it over with myself.

“How is Oskar, Captain?” I asked in a casual tone. He looked over to me again, no emotions visible on his face.

“Alive,” he said, his gaze boring into mine as he approached me. My heart started beating faster, the Captain’s presence overwhelming after his long absence. 

“As you can imagine, my question to you is - how is he alive?” he implored, not letting me go with his eyes for a second. My eyes, on the other hand, started fluttering about the room, looking anywhere but into his. 

“Christ, will you sit down? You’re making me nervous, standing over me like this!” I suddenly exclaimed, surprising both of us equally, I think. He blinked, and lost some of his composure.

“My apologies,” he said, and actually did as I asked, without protest. I breathed out in relief, but he kept looking at me imploringly. I guess I could start by telling him the truth, as a reward for being so compliant. 

“It’s simple, really. The human body is run by electrical impulses, same as your Nautilus, sir. Sometimes, running an electrical current through it may restart the heart, in fortunate cases.”

In hindsight, I think I was as surprised as anyone else that my mad scheme had actually worked. Captain Nemo only looked at me for a long time, his face betraying none of the uproar he must be feeling.

“And pray tell, how do you know this?” came his inevitable next question. I smiled sadly, for we had already hit the threshold of truth I could not yet share. 

“You’ve said so yourself, Captain. I’m a witch.” 

He did not appreciate the joke, and only frowned at me in reply. The thought to try a different approach hit me, the exact opposite one. Of course, I would tell him the truth, as many times before.

“I know so from TV,” I stated simply. He stared at me in frustration, before running a hand over his face. 

“What is this Teevee, that you keep speaking of? Is it a university I have never heard of, or some symposium your father attended? Its variety of teachings is wide, indeed,” he said in a sarcastic tone. He sounded exasperated, I was well aware his keen perception must have guessed the extent of the things I was concealing from him, even if he could not imagine the reason why. But the threshold was truly reached now, I could share no more.

“No, it’s not a university, or any symposium,” I said, my voice sad and exhausted. How much longer could I keep this up, really? It was already a miracle I’d managed so far. Captain Nemo looked at me, his expression now matching the tone of my voice, before he shook his head and came to kneel if front of me. He must know how difficult I found it to deny him when he was so close, and looked at me like that, for I have no other explanation for why he did it. 

“Who are you, Eleonora? Why won’t you tell me?” 

His voice was pleading, and it made my heart ache something fiercely. For many months now, I had wanted nothing more than to finally be rid of the burden of my enormous secret, but it still wasn’t time to share it. Unless…

“Quid pro quo, Captain,” I whispered, and with the flame of hope reignited, I dared reach out my hand to put it against his cheek. His eyes widened, but with a look of immense pain. No, no, no. Not again. Let this be over with already! 

“I will tell you everything, this very instant, if you do the same for me. Odysseus, please! Let us be strangers no more,” I said fervently, grasping at straws, fearing the cold emptiness of the previous weeks returning. In his eyes, staring with the same panic I had felt when he cornered me after the ice bank, I saw that his wish to share his secret was as great as mine. My heart leapt at this, had I finally gotten through? But my euphoria was short-lived, for he grabbed my wrist gently, and put my hand back in my lap, before rising. With a great sigh, he turned away from me. The hope being ripped from me yet again felt nothing so much as my will to live fading. He said nothing more, and I, completely deflated, just sat there for a long while, before gathering enough strength to rise. 

“Thank you for listening to me yesterday. It meant a lot,” I said earnestly, as I turned to leave.

“It has proven a wise choice to do so,” he answered, his back still turned to me, but it stopped me in my tracks. 

“Then, will you not also listen when I repeat that I will forgive anything, if that is the reason you so dread telling me the truth?” I said quietly, and watched as he tensed. With his dark eyes facing away from me, and with nothing to lose, I braved his domineering presence, and went up to him. He did not turn around, standing still as a statue, arms crossed and head bent down. I sighed, and leant my forehead in between his shoulder blades. How much longer could we continue this dance? It was draining me of all I was. At this point, I’m not sure I even cared what he would tell me anymore. It was the constant battle between what I wanted, and what I feared that was so draining. At least if I knew, no matter how awful the truth turned out to be, I would be free. Why wouldn’t he just end both our suffering, and explain? No matter what, before I knew for sure, I still held out hope that when he put all cards on the table it would be enough to understand him. As for the forgiveness, I knew that would still be granted whether I wanted it to or not, which I why I did not hesitate to tell him so. I could only hope he would feel the same, after hearing my story. But there was after all only one way to have my questions answered, before I went completely insane from the secrecy. 

“I fear if you do not tell me soon, I shall give up,” I said, my voice nothing but a whisper now, and I wasn’t sure if he’d heard me. Even if he had, I don’t know what he’d make of it. Deciding it didn’t matter, since he would not change his mind at this moment, I sighed again. For now, we were still in limbo, and I could pretend that everything would end up the way I’d hoped. I wrapped my arms around his chest, and breathed in deeply. I missed him so, so much. Perhaps one day we would dance in the moonlight again, to the rhythm of our hearts beating together. But not today. As I started to let him go, he grabbed my hand, and brought it to his lips. After, when he still did not turn around, or said anything, I left the room in silence. 

Chapter Text

“She says the electrical current from the bullets restarted the heart, since the human body runs on electricity. ‘Like the Nautilus,’ she said, as if she knew so better than I. How she has such a keen understanding of the medium I have no idea. She’s never surprised in the least by anything it can do, even from the very beginning.”

Dakkar was sat at the table in the armory, carefully examining the rifles, one by one, to make sure no further accidents would take place.

“The human body, running on electricity? That can’t be right, can it?” asked Kumar with a bewildered look.

“I have read some studies on the phenomenon, but they are little more than guesswork at the moment. Any practical application should be decades away! Yet, after what I witnessed yesterday… And I still haven’t been able to find out who her father might have been either. There is no Professor Larsson at Uppsala University to match any published works we have onboard,” Dakkar sighed in frustration, putting the coil from a rifle down. After attempting to digest the strangeness of these implications for a moment, Kumar continued his interrogation of the meeting with Eleonora. 

“So she gave you no explanation this time either?” 

Dakkar groaned loudly, and ran a hand over his face.

“She said she would tell me everything, that very instant, if I did the same for her.” 

Kumar could not help but smirk, he would have expected nothing less from her.

“And why didn’t you take her up on the offer?” 

Dakkar gave him a tired look. 

“You know very well why.” 

Kumar shrugged at the dismissal. As often before, he did not agree with the Captain’s assessment of their little Queen. 

“You do not give her enough credit. I’ve told you before, she will understand,” he said in a stern voice. “She is no fool, she knows it won’t be a pleasant truth to hear. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have said she has already forgiven you for it. She loves you, Dakkar, she’s only waiting for you to let her in.” 

Kumar knew how much his dear friend hated hearing him say these things, since he firmly believed they were pure delusions, but Kumar kept repeating them all the same. He would not have done so unless he was absolutely convinced of their truth. Dakkar was, as expected, shaking his head in exasperation. 

“Perhaps it is you giving her too little credit, since you so adamantly swear her feelings for the professor are false? Do you still hold so firmly to this, despite seeing them together only this morning?” 

Kumar rolled his eyes at this. 

“You don’t think I know another man like myself? If you so wanted, you could have them both, but it is not my fault you are a blind fool, refusing to see the truth. No, more than that, you are a coward, refusing to find it out for yourself!” 

Dakkar paled in anger at these words, but Kumar paid him no mind, and continued ruthlessly, long since tired of the charades. 

“If you will not take action, I will have to do so myself, for I am indeed very curious of who our little Ice Queen really is,” he said, raising his eyebrows in challenge. 

“Don’t call her that, she doesn’t like it. And we both very well know you’re not going to do anything of the sort,” Dakkar answered him in a tired voice. 

“Should I call her Circe instead? Perhaps you were right, she might be a witch after all,” Kumar said, attempting a joke to lighten the mood, but it had no success. He sighed.

“Perhaps I will have to take matters into my own hands, my friend. I am tired of seeing you like this,” Kumar said, putting a sympathetic hand on his shoulder. 

“What would be the point? In less than two months we are set to return to the mission, and what then? We drug them to keep them in the dark, or they find out the truth. Either way, she will hate me for it,” Dakkar said, a pang of sharp pain shooting through the melancholy, despite him long being aware of this harsh truth. Kumar looked at him in anguish.

“There is still time to change the future,” he said quietly, yet again pleading for an end to their hateful mission. 

“No. You are forever a dreamer, brother, but you know we must continue. We promised revenge for all onboard, and revenge we will have,” Dakkar answered resolutely, and although his own conviction wavered, the men had spoken. Three months respite, they had agreed, before returning to their rightful role as avengers. 

“Then, of one thing we agree. If you do not give her the chance to understand before June, she would be insane not to hate us for what we will do,” Kumar told him in a pained voice. He went to leave the Captain, but stopped to confront him with one final argument.

“Do you regret her coming onboard?” 

“Of course not. She has already miraculously saved us all once, Oskar now twice, so how could I?” Dakkar answered, and Kumar’s face reddened in frustration over this obvious obtuseness of his meaning.

“Dakkar..!” he said in a warning tone, and the Captain deflated. There was no point in playing these games of pretense with Kumar. 

“Not for as long as I live shall I regret having known her,” he said quietly. Kumar went back up to him, and grabbed him by the shoulders.

“Then, brother, I am begging you - give her a chance to feel the same, for I guarantee that after May, it will be too late! There must be a reason for her having been brought to us, to you, do you not see?” he pleaded with him. Dakkar put a hand over his, and looked at him with a sad smile. 

“It is already too late, my friend. It was too late from the beginning. But as long as she does not know, she may still hold out hope that I am a good man, a man who would deserve her. That is why I will not tell her a moment sooner than I have to,” he stated in anguished resignation. Kumar stared at him, and shook his head in disbelief. He knew Dakkar too well to think there was any point in arguing with him when he had already made up his mind. Letting him go, he staggered to the door, but before he left, said over his shoulder;

“You are a fool, brother, but a good man all the same.”

Chapter Text

Every day that passed by after my conversation with the Captain, in which I had finally exhausted every last option for coercing him into telling me his secret, I fell further and further into apathy. Now that I no longer trusted him so completely, I had started doubting he would ever share their truth, despite giving me his word. I had been a fool not to demand a deadline from him, but in that moment I had had no reason to do so. Now, he could technically wait a decade, or even longer, to tell me without breaking his word. I would have gone mad from this existence long before then. Indeed, I felt more and more estranged to the life we had been leading onboard so far. The wonders of the sea no longer held the same fascination for me, the food no longer tasted as exciting, and the prospect of sailing the world was more frightening than anything else. Most of the crew now treated me like nothing so much as a leper since the incident with Oskar, and I would only go down to the mess hall to fetch a plate of food that I then ate alone in my cabin. I could not stand their looks, as if I held the power of life and death in my hands, and could smite them down then and there. Still, I could not regret that I had acted. Oskar was alive because of me, and three days after his miraculous resurrection, Kumar told me he was awake. I smiled at him, and squeezed his hand, but declined the invitation to go see Oskar. I did not want to scare him needlessly in his fragile condition. 

So it was, that I no longer spent any time with the crew, but in the company of the other convicts only. I had recently revived my old joke, since it now felt more true than ever. The Nautilus had veered away from the coast, and Ned Land was despondent. The four of us were up on the platform, and as I was little more than an appendix to Pierre at the moment, I was sat there listening to a lengthy discussion on what was to become of them. When no conclusion could be reached on when they would have their next opportunity to flee, the Canadian put forward a desperate proposition. 

“He can’t really intend to keep us here the rest of our lives… Couldn’t you just ask him?” Ned exclaimed at last. Both me and Pierre looked at him in disbelief, Conseil looked serene as always. Perhaps Ned had already suggested this to him when they were alone. 

“Ned, mon ami… What good could come of it?” asked Pierre warily.

“What bad could come of it? He’s already got us imprisoned here, how much worse could it get?” Ned said, throwing his arms up in an exasperated gesture.

“He might be alerted to our plans, if I put the question forward, Ned. It might make the chances of our escape go from slim to nonexistent,” Pierre tried to reason with him.

“Like you say, the chances are already slim, so we don’t have much to lose. He likes you though, professor. If the question came from you, he might be inclined to let us go,” Ned said quietly, almost pleading. He was near the end of his wits after his half-year imprisonment, still with no end in sight, and I understood him. So did Pierre, who sighed deeply.

“I will consider it, ami Ned,” he resigned finally.

“Good,” said the Canadian, and went away with Conseil, who remained the ever disinterested party in the question. Pierre ran a hand through his dark blonde locks, and sighed again. 

“What is your opinion on this plan, mademoiselle?” he asked me, sitting down on the beacon housing. 

“I agree with you, mon ami. Captain Nemo is not a man to be reasoned with, I’m afraid,” I said bitterly, as I crossed my arms, and looked out to sea. No land in sight. 

“And if, against all odds, he would give us our freedom… Would you still stay?” Pierre asked me in a pensive voice. I stiffened. 

“Chérie, you are no longer happy onboard, anyone can see that. I am so very sorry things have not gone the way you hoped, and with that I do not know that I could leave you behind anymore. I know the thought of escaping is frightening, but-”

“That is not the reason I would not come with you,” I interrupted him. I did not look at him, but could feel him watching me. Exasperated, he decided to break our silent pact of not speaking of one particular subject, despite us both since long being aware of the truth. 

“You love him,” he said simply, and the softly spoken words felt like a whip cracking in my ears. Drained of all will to refute the claim - what point would it serve? - I sank down onto the platform. Pierre let me gather my thoughts in silence, and after a long while I spoke up.

“That is not the only reason for me choosing to stay, mon ami. I understand you wanting to return, of course I do. You have your life to live, and you need to publish your research. You’ll be the most celebrated naturalist of your time,” I smiled sadly. He arose, and came to sit beside me. 

“And you, chérie, have you not your life to live as well?” He tried to look into my eyes, but I kept my gaze firmly fixed on the horizon to remain calm.

“No, Pierre, I do not. I have nothing to return to. I have no family, no home, no money, and no means to provide for myself. I cannot bear the thought of marrying Ned, only to be left alone for years on end, in an unfamiliar place. So, regardless of how unbearable our existence aboard has become, you must understand that to me, it is still preferable to leaving.” 

These burdens played no small part in my constant state of depression, only kept at bay by me staying completely apathetic to them. 

“I would provide for you, ma chérie,” Pierre said in a quiet voice, after contemplating my words. I gave a sad laugh.

“That’s very kind of you, mon ami, and I know you would, but I couldn’t possibly let you. Besides, what would people think?”

“They would think nothing of it, if we were married,” he said, matter-of-factly. I’d clearly misunderstood what he’d meant by ‘provide’, and turned my head towards him in shock. 

“You can’t mean that!”

“And why not?” he said, slightly indignant. “I am aware you are a fine lady, but I am a successful academic, I lead a respectful life, and my salary is enough to provide for a wife-” 

I interrupted him with a gesture.

“No, no, that’s not what I meant. I know all that. It’s just…” 

I struggled to find the way to let him know I was well aware of why he was not already married, why he would never marry a woman, without insulting him. I realised there may not be a way, but deciding he had already breeched our contract of not speaking of certain things, I voiced the reason anyway.

“I am a woman, Pierre. Is that not reason enough for you not to want to marry me?” 

I put it forward not as a question, but as a statement, raising my eyebrows, but using the most empathetic voice I could. I saw him first pale, then fluster, as his gaze flitted about in a panic. My heart nearly broke seeing him like this, over such a simple matter, in my time the most natural thing in the world, and I hastened to put my hands to his face, forcing him to look at me. 

“I do not care, my dearest friend, I love you all the same. There is nothing but goodness in you, do you understand?” 

His eyes fastened on mine in absolute astonishment, and he seemed to cease breathing for a moment. I stayed silent, letting my words sink in, and he placed his hand on top of mine. 

“Tu le penses vraiment?” he asked in breathless wonder. I smiled warmly at him. 

“I always have,” I assured him, letting go of his face. He stared at me in silence.

“Kumar told me of him and Jakub many months ago, and they too are both dear friends to me, are they not? And moreover, by no means the first such friends I’ve had, I can assure you, and I’ve never once had cause to regret it,” I told him in a fervor, desperately needing him to understand how much I meant what I was saying. 

“But you do see, this is why we cannot marry. It would be a farce, would it not?” I asked, my voice now gentle, and he looked away with a frown. 

“No more a farce than our current arrangement, tu sais. I love you dearly, more than any woman I have met before, and would be overjoyed to not have to part with you. Although, I could perhaps not perform all of the usual husbandly duties, no. But mademoiselle, would this bother you? You have said before you have no interest in motherhood!” he exclaimed, turning back to me. I wasn’t sure how to tell him that that had never been my motivation for going to bed with a man, whether I was able to have children or not. Then again, I didn’t think I would ever want to again regardless, if I left my heart aboard this ship. I looked at Pierre, and considered what our life together in Paris would be like. I imagined living in his cosy flat, sleeping safely next to him, and perhaps helping him in his research. I imagined walking down the newly built boulevards, and witnessing the opening of the Palais Garnier. With my knowledge of the future, I was sure I would be able to invest Pierre’s money wisely, and we could live in great comfort. I wouldn’t mind living through La Belle Époque. I could grow to like absinthe, and if I drank enough of it, I might sometimes be able to forget about the Nautilus and her Captain. I closed my eyes as the wave of pain washed over me, this insurmountable obstacle to any other future making itself known. I took a deep breath to regain my calm.

“You are right, mon ami. It would not bother me, and we do love each other, if not as a husband and wife usually does. But would we not enter into this marriage, both in love with another?” I asked, in the most pensive way imaginable, for I was not sure if he knew his feelings had been as obvious to me as mine had been to him. I watched as he froze, his breathing ceasing again, as he realised what I’d said. I thought he might storm off, if this proved one confession too much for the moment, but he surprised me. Rather than getting upset, he deflated completely with a great sigh.

“That may be true, chérie, but what does it matter for either of us? What could come of it? You do have the advantage, certainly, but a small advantage it is! Whatever love the Captain still has in his heart is for the sea alone, the rest of him is filled only with thoughts of their great cause,” he said, his voice bitter over this fact. Not for the fact that neither of us would ever experience what it was like to be loved by the great Captain, but over his wasted potential. All that genius, that could have done so much good, forever lost beneath the waves. My eyes filled with tears over Pierre’s words, because I knew he was right. What could ever come of it? I put my head on his shoulder, and he wrapped his arm around me. I sobbed quietly as I tried to accept this horrible reality, and accept that the dream of what it could have been would never come true. When I looked up, much later, after all the tears had run dry, and my energy to cry was gone, I saw that Pierre had been crying too. He looked at me with a sad smile, and I reached up to kiss his cheek.

“Thank you for your kind proposal, mon cher, I will sincerely consider it,” I said solemnly, before rising, and retiring to my cabin.

Chapter Text

My situation remained unchanged over the following days, and I had not seen the Captain for over a week now, since our latest meeting. I spent all my waking time with Pierre, and sometimes Ned and Conseil would join us. So, at one such a time, we were cruising near the Bahamas, at a depth of fifteen hundred meters. It had been long now since any sight through the lounge window had roused me from the apathy, yet I remained at my normal station underneath it. Today would however prove to offer more than one distraction from the normal pace, and not just for me. It started when I overheard my friends discussing giant squid, or ‘devil fish’, they called them, as we passed through what Pierre assessed was their possible habitat, and I perked up. Could this be my change to see one of these elusive creatures - alive, not preserved in a museum? The thought was almost overwhelming, for no other large animal remained as mysterious still in my day. It would not be before my lifetime - my original one - that one of them was filmed in their natural habitat. I had always been beyond fascinated by them, and had tried to find out every detail there was to know of them, although as I said, even in my day we knew very little of them. I sat up, and looked out the window intently. I sincerely hoped we would meet none of their natural predators, the sperm whales, lest the Captain went on another mad killing spree. Unfortunately, he would, although the object of his ire was a different one this time. I listened to my friends as Pierre and Conseil’s stories of the giant squid became more and more fantastical by the minute, Ned refuting them all with a sneer, before Pierre put forward some actual facts. Only just then, I stopped listening altogether, as a fantastical sight appeared outside the window. She came out of nowhere, more elusive than any ghost or apparition. She was beautiful, absolutely enormous, her slender tentacles gently examining this unknown steel beast that had disturbed her. She looked nothing like the sad, deflated corpses I’d seen in formaldehyde. Her skin shifted in a faint golden gleam in the light from our beacon, and her giant, startlingly human eyes were looking at us intently. Man is more closely related to starfish than cephalopods, and to find a common ancestor one would have to go back some six hundred million years, yet in her gaze I saw intelligence and understanding, transcending the ages that separated us. I put my hand to the window, tears welling up in my eyes.

“Hej, du vackra,” I whispered, scarcely believing my luck. How many people would be granted such a sight in the next century and a half? A handful, if even that. I was startled awake from my awe by a cry from Ned Land.

“What an awful animal!” he exclaimed, as he came up to the window. 

“Awful? She’s magnificent,” I said with a smile, my voice reverent. From the corner of my eye, I saw him give me a disbelieving glance.

“If you say so…” 

I paid him no mind, but continued watching the strange, mesmerising creature outside. I could see the serrated teeth of each suction cup clearly, as she put a tentacle to the glass. 

“Ned, have you ever seen series of circular markings around the mouth of cachalots?” I asked absent-mindedly, and he turned to me with a frown. 

“Sure, often. Why?”

“How big do they get?” I asked, trying to determine the size of this squid’s suction cups. She must have been close to eight meters long, not counting the two feeding arms, and the largest suction cups were about two inches in diameter. 

“About this big at most,” Ned answered me, mightily confused at my strange questions. He held up his hands to make a circle of about five inches. My eyes widened, and I smiled in triumph. ‘There are giants out there in the canyons’, I thought, humming the tune to myself. The beauty outside was but a baby in comparison. Ned only shook his head when I did not elaborate further. Pierre had begun sketching the squid, and came up to the window for a closer look. I glanced over to his paper.

“She’s got two longer arms hidden away as well, there should be ten in total,” I said, pointing to the paper. He looked up at me in confusion, but I just smiled. 

“C’est peut-être le même que celui de l’Alecton,” came Conseil’s voice from behind us. Ned disagreed, since that squid had been maimed in the attempt to haul it onboard, but Pierre said it was possible, for they are able to regrow missing limbs.

“While that is true, Monsieur le Professeur, it would not have survived being parted from its ‘tail’, since it holds all its vital organs. Still, it was dying already if it was on the surface. They cannot survive the change in pressure for long,” I explained in English, for while my French was massively improved, I was still far from sufficiently well-spoken enough to express such a sentence in a coherent way. Luckily, Conseil’s English had improved at the same rate, and we could now communicate more or less efficiently, though each of us speaking in the language we were more comfortable with. Sometimes though, we would find more common ground in certain words through German, for while I do not speak it, it shares many roots with Swedish. But I digress. Me sharing my knowledge gave Pierre pause, as it often did, and I suspected he must be close to a meltdown at this point. However, we were both distracted, as Ned suddenly put in;

“Anyhow, if it isn’t this fellow, maybe it’s one of those!” His keen eyesight had spotted several more of the giant squid coming up to us. I gave a cry of glee. This was astounding! So they were not completely solitary animals, but could band together in defense of a common enemy. No doubt they assumed the Nautilus one of their arch nemeses, an unusually large sperm whale. They must have been attracted by the light, surely their first time witnessing it so bright, and I prayed it would not damage their eyes. None of the squid approaching differed much in size to the first one, and I wondered if perhaps this meant that younger ones might live in groups, while the older ones stay to themselves. So much to find out about them… My thoughts were interrupted by a sudden jolt, the ship trembled, and we came to a halt. The four of us looked at one another in confusion.

“Did we run aground?” Pierre asked.

“In any event we’re already clear, because we’re floating,” stated Ned. He was right, but we were not moving. Not a minute went by before Captain Nemo entered the lounge, closely followed by Kumar. The latter bore an uncharacteristic frown on his face, while the former looked emotionless as ever, although somewhat worn. He came up to the window where I was sat, but did not speak to any of us, and seemed almost unaware we were even there. He and Kumar studied the giant squid outside for a moment, before the Captain said a few words to his chief officer, who nodded, and left the lounge. Not another minute went by before the window panels closed, and the salon lit up. I sighed at the loss of the fantastical sight outside. Pierre, in his patient and amiable nature, went over to the Captain and spoke to him, despite the man’s glum appearance. 

“Une curieuse collection de poulpes,” he said in a carefree tone, but I knew how much he too missed the company of our Captain, and how badly he must hope he would take the time to speak to him of the wonders of the ocean again. But his wishes were not granted, as Captain Nemo answered coolly;

“En effet, monsieur le naturaliste, et nous allons les combattre corps à corps.” 

I blinked at the both of them. I was sure I had somehow either misheard or misunderstood, but when I saw that Pierre’s expression matched my own, I felt my hope fading. 

“Corps à corps?” he asked in disbelief.

“Oui, monsieur. L’hélice est arrêtée. Je pense que les mandibules cornées de l’un de ces calmars se sont engagées dans ses branches. Ce qui nous empêche de marcher,” Captain Nemo explained, and my heart sank. ‘Poor creature’, I thought, but my sympathies were not shared by the Captain this time either. 

“Et qu’allez-vous faire?” Pierre questioned him, still perplexed.

“Remonter à la surface et massacrer toute cette vermine,” he answered with a scowl of hate towards the ‘vermin’, as he dared call them. I could still barely believe what I was hearing.

“Entreprise difficile,” Pierre tried, but was not met by any doubt from the Captain. 

“En effet. Les balles électriques sont impuissantes contre ces chairs molles où elles ne trouvent pas assez de résistance pour éclater. Mais nous les attaquerons à la hache,” he stated as if this was the most natural thing in the world. 

“Et au harpon, monsieur, si vous ne refusez pas mon aide!” the bloodthirsty Ned Land exclaimed, seeing his chance of an exciting battle. 

“Je l’accepte, maître Land,” Nemo answered him graciously. 

“Nous vous accompagnerons,” said Pierre fervently, and it was only as the four of them went to leave that I found the composure to act. I arose in a fervor.

“Captain, wait, please!” I called, and I saw him stiffen, before turning to me with a frown.

“You mean to make a case for these beasts as well, miss?” he asked, and I could not quite tell if he was smiling or sneering at me. Regardless, his words hurt me. I went up to him, but had not the energy to fight him with the same passion as over the whales. 

“I would, if I thought it would help, but I can tell you hold no sympathy for them either,” I scolded, and thought for a moment I saw some regret in his expression. “Instead, I will put forward logical arguments for not risking a fight. I do not know the strength of a giant squid, but I would not be surprised if they proved a dangerous enemy. However, you do not need to fight them, by rising to the surface the change in pressure alone should kill them eventually.” 

The prospect of the beautiful, alien beings dying simply for the crime of defending themselves against an intruder in their home hurt me immensely, but this was already inevitable. I could at least make sure none of my friends were hurt in the process as well. I saw Captain Nemo contemplating my words, and thought for a second that I had gotten through, but then he shook his head.

“We cannot afford to wait. We need to continue our journey,” he stated, his hard tone leaving no room for arguments, and my apathy left no room for a fight. I looked at him with a plea in my eyes, but he only scowled, and turned on his heel. I sighed, and followed them in resignation. When we got to the central companionway, where some ten crewmen were waiting, my friends grabbed weapons like the rest of the men were already furnished with. Captain Nemo turned to me. 

“Eleonora, you will not partake in this. Go back to the lounge,” he told me sternly, but his expression was worried. 

“So you’re aware of the risks?” I retorted, and he frowned. I did not want to leave. I knew they were all in danger, and evidently, so did he.

“Do as I say,” he snapped back, before turning away from me. I cast my eyes down, and started heading back, when I heard the hatch opening behind me in a frightful haste. I automatically turned back at the sound, as watched as a long tentacle shot down the hatch. Captain Nemo rushed forward at once, and chopped it off with a swift swing of his ax. The sight of the severed arm filled me with nausea, but it was forgotten as more tentacles slid into the Nautilus’s interior, and grabbed one of the crewmen. I cried out in terror as the man, his name was Antoine, was carried away through the opening. My terror increased further as I saw the Captain rushing after him with a cry, followed by the rest of the men. I went to grab an ax as well, I could not stand by as they risked their lives in this foolish undertaking, but was struck by a different idea. I rushed down the second staircase to the crew quarters below, shouting as I banged on the doors.

“Come quickly, help me!” 

Several men appeared, looking bewildered, but did not question me as I rushed past them towards the storage room. They followed me as I grabbed a crate of sodium, half full, or I would have struggled as much as last time. 

“Bring as many as you can up to the platform!” I instructed in a fervor, before rushing back up the two stairs. Arriving at the battlescene unfolding outside, I could no longer see Antoine, but no one else had perished. The men were covered in blood and ink, all fighting a dozen squid, that were clearly panicked by their imminent demise. I hated every part of this enterprise with a passion, but I was too scared to lose one of the people I loved to not help kill the squid. I rushed over to where Kumar and Jakub were hacking away at one of the poor creatures, although they did make mighty opponents, as I had predicted. I heaved the crate of salt over the squid’s body, and it started writhing terribly in death throes, before sliding back into the water. The crew I had brought with me all saw what happened, and wasted no time in following my example. As the salt burned the delicate skin of the creatures, they lost focus of their enemies, and would retreat. The fight was almost won, there was but three squid left alive, but all sodium crates had been emptied. I was just about to rush back down with the others to fetch more, when I heard Pierre give a panicked cry. I whipped around, but saw him safe. He rushed towards one of the still live animals, that was just about to cut Ned open with its beak. Before either of us could come to his rescue, Captain Nemo plunged his ax in between the squid’s mandibles. Ned got up, and speared it to death with his harpoon. I saw Nemo say a few words to him, but could not hear them. Ned only nodded in reply. With that, all the giant squid had been murdered, and we were safe. The men were all heaving from the exertion, covered in gore, and started going down the hatch with heavy steps. Some of them glanced at me with the same suspicion I should by now have gotten used to, but it still hurt to see my friends so scared of me. I turned away from them, and saw Captain Nemo standing motionless at the far end of the platform. In the middle stood Pierre, who looked between us. I went up to him, and we watched as the Captain stared out at the sea that had so brutally claimed another one of his companions, while large tears streamed down his face. Pierre took my arm, and meant to lead me down the companionway, but I shook my head. He left me with a worried frown. I stood still for a long time as well, watching the Captain, not knowing what to do. Again, he had proven my worst fears about him. If he’d listened to me, Antoine might not have had to die. And who knows if everyone else would have lived, if I had not intervened. If we had not disturbed the giant squid, they might not have had to die. I would not have had to torture them. And yet, as I looked at Captain Nemo, all I felt was intense sympathy for his pain. I do not know how long we had been standing there, when he turned his face to me. Such intense anguish was written all over it that my love for him made it impossible not to forgive him his faults. It frightened me something awful, the things I was willing, or helpless, to forgive him for. The sight of him, the red blood and black ink drying into his clothes and hair, his tears marking their path through these colours on his face, and the pain in his eyes proved too much for my resolve. I went up to him, and reached my arms around his shoulders, wrapping him in an embrace. He buried his face in my neck, held me tight, and started sobbing. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to hold back my own tears, as I stroked his hair while he cried. I wanted to reassure him, but could not think of what words could possibly be comforting in this situation, so I just gently shushed his sobs. Once he quieted, I still held on to him, and he did not let me go either. He lifted his face after a long time, and looked at me. His expression was wide-eyed and pleading, as if I could single-handedly make everything in the world better, but I could not. I could do nothing at all, since he would not let me share his burdens, so I was forever forced to watch on as he made things worse and worse. What kind of existence is that? I realised in that moment that because I would never be able to do anything but love him, I would slowly kill myself by staying with him. I would wither away, as I saw all my illusions shattered by him. It had already started, and would only get worse. I saw that the turning point had been reached. In that moment, I tried to say goodbye to the man I had thought he was, my sun, my Odysseus, and could not help but lose my battle against the tears. As they ran down my face, I took his head in my hands, and kissed each of his cheeks gently. He closed his eyes in defeat, for he must have seen the hope fade from my gaze. I reluctantly let him go, and he did not stop me as I left him, alone on the platform. 

Chapter Text

For the next ten days, we sailed aimlessly about the location where Antoine had met his demise, the Nautilus a piece of driftwood in a circular stream, going nowhere. It took me a long time to think over my decision, looking at it from every angle, but I could come to no other conclusion. I had to leave this wondrous ship, and the wondrous man who had built her. I could forgive him all he did, but I could not forgive myself. I felt a strange peacefulness, as one does after accepting the unacceptable, as I knocked on the door of Pierre’s stateroom one evening. He opened it, and saw at once that something had happened. He said nothing as he studied me for a moment, before gesturing for me to take a seat. 

“Chérie, que s'est-il passé?” he asked after a long while, when I did not speak up. I did not know how to say it, but I had made up my mind, and there was no turning back. 

“I am going with you. I will marry you, Pierre, if you’ll still have me,” I said earnestly, but suddenly felt self-conscious as I looked at him. He was stunned at first, but then sank to his knees in front of me, taking my face in his hands.

“You mean it, chérie?” he asked, and I could tell he knew what this decision had cost me. I smiled sadly at him, and nodded. His face lit up, and he reached his head forward, placing a slight kiss on my lips. I opened my eyes, and looking into his smiling ones, I felt such overwhelming love for him. My sweet, gentle Pierre, who never asked a thing in return for all he gave me. I put my arms around him in a warm embrace, thanking the stars he would be there, that there was another person in this world who would understand what I had been through. Even when all other evidence that any of this had been real was gone, he too would remember. If we ever did manage to escape, that is. The prospect was so daunting, I felt that no matter when we got the chance, it would come both too soon and not soon enough. When I let him go, I saw that he felt much the same way. He was still sat on one knee, and seemed to get an idea. He took off the ring he always wore on the little finger of his right hand, a black garnet inlaid with gold, and slipped it onto my ring finger. We both stared at it for a long moment. I was about to protest, but he spoke up before I could think how.

“I never thought I would get to do that,” he said with a surprised laugh. He looked up at me with so much genuine joy I could not help but smile back. I sincerely hoped he would not come to regret his offer after our escape, and I had vowed to myself I would do my best to make his life, if not better, then at least not worse. He arose, and kissed me again. I was surprised at this, and he laughed at my expression. 

“Should I not kiss my fiancée?” he asked, and I actually blushed a little at hearing the word spoken out loud. 

“I did perhaps not think you would want to,” I said bashfully. He thought about it for a second, but then shrugged.

“Une bouche est une bouche,” he said, and I shocked myself by laughing out loud. I could not remember the last time I had laughed, and the feeling washed over me with relief like a hot shower in the winter. He looked elated at the sound.

“Mon Dieu, Monsieur le Professeur! You shock me!” I said, still laughing.

“Have you not heard the expression before, mademoiselle?” he grinned.

“No, I have actually, from another man of your disposition,” I said, wiping a tear from my eye.

“Ah, French?” he asked with feigned innocence, and I laughed even harder. 

“No, he was Swedish!” I managed to get out.

“Alors, we are the same in every country, it seems,” he sighed, and laughed with me. 

Somehow, things seemed a little easier to bear after this. There was a light at the end of the tunnel. ‘Hellfire’, a sick voice in my mind would sneer, but I tried to push it away. Surely, once enough time had passed, I could think of the memory of Captain Nemo and all the wonders of the sea in fond remembrance. ‘You wanted adventure, and you got it. Are you not pleased?’ the voice would say, and I shrugged it off. Paris would be an adventure too. I could also come with Pierre on his research expeditions. ‘What will live up to the Nautilus?’ I heard, and shook my head to be rid of the thought. I was clearly no longer wanted onboard. I would not overstay my welcome. ‘He will be heartbroken’, the voice then said, and I paused, a pain shooting through my chest. 

“He’ll be fine. He won’t have to listen to my nagging anymore,” I said out loud, to assert my dominance over the silent voice. I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath.

“He’ll be fine,” I repeated. “It will be as if we never existed.” 

‘It won’t be as if he never existed’, came the inevitable reply, and I sighed. This I could not refute.

Chapter Text

Passing through the Gulf Stream offered us yet another variety of sights to marvel at. Up on the platform one day, Pierre explained to Conseil that he could not feel the waters temperature because it was the same as our blood, and I filled in that the human body has no receptors to perceive humidity, but only does so through other factors, such as heat or cold. I had long since stopped caring if they wondered where all my knowledge came from. Through the lounge windows, we spotted rays, and sharks so small not even the professor was scared of them.

“Aren’t you glad the Megalodon is extinct?” I jeered at him, and he shuddered in horror. We stayed up late one night to watch the myriad of phosphorescent algae dance around the Nautilus, and with a pang of sadness, I remembered swimming among them in the Coral Sea. It was perhaps the most magical natural experience I would ever have, and only one other person had been there to share it.

On May 8th, we were abreast of North Carolina, and Ned was more despondent than ever. To be so close to these readily available means of escape, but unable to make use of them because of the foul weather, was driving him insane. He had been overjoyed when I told him I would be coming with them, and so genuinely happy for me and Pierre that I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude towards him. He was a good man, one of the best I had ever known, and I wished to see him no longer suffer from our imprisonment. In truth, by now we were all suffering more or less. Still, when he came to tell Pierre that if he did not ask Captain Nemo outright if he’d been serious about our life sentence, then Ned would do it himself, I could not agree. 

“But I seldom see him. He positively avoids me,” Pierre said, trying to stall, but Ned was incessant. 

“All the more reason you should go see him.” 

I definitely could not agree with this. The Captain was difficult to reason with under the best of circumstances, let alone as things had been the last two weeks. Neither I nor Pierre had caught but a glimpse of him, he did indeed seem to be avoiding us like the plague. I tried my damndest not to take an interest - what point would it serve, when I would leave him soon anyway? - and I no longer asked Kumar about him. 

“This really is a superbly bad idea, if you ask me,” I interjected in exasperation.

“Well I’m not,” Ned said in a sour voice. Fine, it’s not like I was the one who had the most experience arguing with the impossible Captain or anything, so why ask me? To by great surprise, Pierre conceded.

“I’ll ask him about it, Ned,” he sighed, and my eyes widened in bewilderment. But this assurance was not enough for a man who had nothing to lose. 

“When?” Ned shot back at once.

“When I meet up with him,” Pierre answered, squirming. Ned’s eyes darkened under a great frown.

“Professor Aronnax, would you like me to go find him myself?” 

Both me and Pierre hastened to dissuade him of this - if possible - even worse option.

“No, let me do it. Tomorrow-” Pierre began, but was interrupted.

“Today!” Ned said sternly. We stared at him, but he was as impossible to argue with as the Captain, and we were stuck in the middle of their two wills.

“So be it. I’ll see him today,” Pierre finally sighed in resignation. 

“Good,” Ned said in a short tone, and left us. We retired to Pierre’s stateroom, to talk things over, but were given no opportunity to do so, as we could hear Captain Nemo next door. 

“Pierre, really…” I tried, my eyes pleading, but I did not know how to phrase any viable argument for waiting, after Pierre had given Ned his word.

“Je sais, ma chérie,” he said with a sigh, and squeezed my shoulder before going to knock on the door in between their rooms. There was no reply, but before I could stop him, Pierre turned the knob, and opened it. I closed my eyes, for I could not imagine a worse start to the already doomed conversation. He closed the door behind him, and I, unable to stop myself, went up and put my ear to it. I heard the Captain answering Pierre in curt sentences at first, but the latter remained admirably collected. After Captain Nemo sarcastically asked if the reason for his visit was some new discovery that had eluded him, I was sure Pierre would give up, but instead, the Captain made the most astonishing confession. He showed Pierre a manuscript he was working on, containing not only his extraordinary research, but also his complete life story. My heart was beating in my chest as I listened to this, I grew hot from trying to stave off the desperate need I felt to throw open the door, and grab the manuscript. All the indifference I had fought so, so hard to upbring regarding Captain Nemo and his story was gone in an instant, and I want to say the effort I showed in staying put was nothing short of super human. Had Pierre managed to see anything written? I wanted to ask him now, now, now. But he did not even give me a clue, instead using this as a segue into asking his question. As expected, Nemo swiftly dismissed this attempt, in the most definitive way. To his credit, Pierre did not give up, but instead took it one step further. I was almost moved to tears as I heard him plead with the Captain.

“...quand notre cœur a pu battre pour vous…” ‘When our hearts could beat with yours’. Christ, this was far closer to a confession of his feelings than I would have ever expected. His arguments were kinder, less demanding than the ones I’d put forward to the same cause, but the outcome was the same. In a cold voice, Captain Nemo shot him down completely, and I watched as Pierre reentered his room in absolute defeat. 

We went into the library for cigars, to be away from the Captain, and to process the conversation. Although our main focus should have been the fact that he did indeed intend to keep us onboard forever, we could not help but discuss the manuscript as well. 

“What if we stole it?” I asked, only half-joking, but Pierre looked at me admonishingly. No, what would be the point of learning the Captain’s secrets if he did not want to share them himself? We talked of the strange way in which he had responded to Pierre’s claim that any slave has the right to flee. Did he mean he wanted us to escape, so that he would be rid of us while not having to blame himself for endangering both him and his crew? The Captain was as difficult to understand as ever before, and I hated the way he had so coldly dismissed Pierre’s heartfelt confession of admiration.

“Did you mean it, mon ami? Would you stay if he let us share in their existence?” I asked gently. He sighed, and took a deep drag of his cigar.

“Je ne sais pas, ma chérie. I still want to believe he is a good man, but so much evidence point to the contrary, non?” he said, his eyes filled with grief. I understood his feelings perfectly, for they were mine as well. We went to tell Ned Land and Conseil of the disappointing, albeit not surprising, result of Pierre’s conversation with Captain Nemo. 

“Now we know that we can’t expect a thing from that man. The Nautilus is nearing Long Island. We’ll escape no matter what the weather’s like,” Ned stated resolutely.

Chapter Text

I stayed up long after everyone else had gone to bed, not wanting to deprive myself of a single minute of whatever time I had left to look at the miracles of the undersea world outside. As long as the window panels stayed open, I would stay on my usual perch. To say I felt peaceful would be an overstatement, but the apathy I had fought so hard to keep at bay in the earlier months I now welcomed. It kept me safe from the earth-shattering pain I would have otherwise felt at leaving behind my hopes and dreams of what would have been my future aboard the Nautilus. I was now thankful that the crew had withdrawn from me out of fear, and the Captain out of… I could not say for sure why he had withdrawn, but it was clear he no longer enjoyed neither mine nor Pierre’s presence onboard. Whatever the reason, this is what made me leaving possible. Had I thought either the Captain or his crew still wanted me here, I do not know if I would have been able to leave them. I looked down at Pierre’s ring, and thought how strange it was that I should this time join the escapees, and while I was glad not to have to part from him, I detested that I should have to part with anyone. These men, both the passengers and the crew of the Nautilus, had become my friends, my family, my safe haven in the storm that was the event that had thrown me back in time. Despite circumstances having changed, I was still convinced it was no coincidence that I had landed here of all places. However, I had proven too weak to fulfill my destiny, or the Captain too strong, which was true I cannot say. I had lost too much of myself already, I would not lose all for a man who loved only the sea in return.

Deep in these musings, I watched the mareld dancing outside the window, as we cruised beneath the moonlight. The waves of the unruly sea above was whipping up the phosphorescent algae into glowing peaks, and seeing it from below I could have thought we were travelling through the birth of galaxies. 

“What a beautiful sight,” came a deep voice from the dark, and I startled in surprise. I had not heard anyone enter, nor expected anyone to at this late hour. Captain Nemo stepped into the light from the window, with none of his usual gracefulness, and I wondered if he had looked as dreadful earlier that day. Pierre had made no mention of it, but it was now clear even in the dim light that he had been crying. More than that though, he looked like he had barely slept or ate since last I saw him. The sight was distressing to me. Had something happened? Or was he still mourning the death of Antoine, which he no doubt faulted himself for? I sat up, and watched warily as he sank down onto the sofa opposite me. He ran his hands over his face, as if he could scrub his mind clean of whatever depressive state he was in. 

“What’s wrong, Captain?” I could not help but ask. Christ, how far did my compassion for this man extend, who had that same day announced he was keeping us imprisoned here for life? He looked up with frown, but did not answer me. 

“Would you like a drink?” he said instead, and arose. He had to steady himself on the back of the sofa for a moment, and my eyebrows furrowed in suspicion. 

“Are you ill, sir?” I called after him, as he went up to the bar table. He gave a joyless laugh.

“No, I’m not ill,” he told me, confirming my suspicion. 

“I thought you didn’t make a habit of drinking in excess?” I said sarcastically, but with an undertone of wariness, as he handed me a glass of the Palmata liquor. 

“I’m not making it a habit, I’m making an exception,” he said, mocking my reply from New Year’s Eve. He sat down again, and watched me intently. 

“How come?” I tried again, uncomfortable in his gaze, still as piercing as ever. He said nothing for a long while, and I had to look away from him. I was thankful for the drink now, and took a large gulp of it. 

“The professor came to see me earlier,” he then said, his eyes still not leaving me. I took another gulp of the liquor as I contemplated my answer. 

“I know. I was listening at the door,” was the one I settled for, as I saw no point in lying. He scoffed. 

“I know.” 

We looked at each other in silence, each trying to gauge what the other one wanted, trying to find leverage somehow. I do not know if he found it, or decided he didn’t care, for his question was honest and straight-forward;

“Are you wanting to leave as well?” 

I stared at him, suddenly terrified of admitting the truth, for there was so much to it. He grew irritated when I did not reply.

“Did you hear me? Do you want to leave me as well?” 

That is not what he had asked the first time, and this question implied something wholly different. How could I explain to him that it was the last thing I wanted, yet the only option I had? I started squirming, desperately wanting out of this situation, for I had never seen it coming. Why was he tormenting me? Was he not hoping to be rid of the four of us as soon as possible? 

“Answer me!” he exclaimed, and I squeezed my eyes shut. This was too much. I could not face him when he cornered me like this. 

“No, Captain, but I have to,” I whispered, unable to tell a lie in that moment. When he said nothing in return, I opened my eyes slowly, and saw that he had hidden his face in his hands. I felt dazed. What was happening? I could not understand the complete juxtaposition of his behavior earlier to what I was now seeing. 

“Why?” came his muffled voice, and I could barely hear it over my beating heart. What did he want me to say? I struggled to find the words to convey my reasoning, and sat dumbstuck. He looked up at me, tears now in his eyes. I was so bewildered to see this I thought I must be having a nightmare. 

“How could I stay?” I asked in breathless confusion, posing the question as much to myself as to him. I saw him close his eyes, and take a deep breath, to reel himself in. When he opened them again, there was a hard, unforgiving look in them, and it frightened me. I had never seen him look at me like that before. 

“What would you even do, a lone woman, back in society? How would you provide for yourself?” he sneered, and his heartless tone felt like a whip cracking in my ears. His words hurt me beyond measure, so I had no reason to feel guilty when I replied. And yet I did. 

“Pierre has asked me to marry him,” I stated simply. I saw Captain Nemo’s eyes widen, and only then did he seem to take notice of the ring on my finger. He paled, and his expression went from bewildered, to anguished, to finally settle on what I can only describe as betrayed. He stared at me for a moment before speaking up.

“So you would rather be Madame Aronnax than Penelope?” he asked, but his voice did not betray any of the emotions clearly visible on his face. I blinked in confusion, my mind desperately searching for a meaning behind his strange words. And for the first time I found one. I knew who he meant, I knew who Penelope was. The queen of Ithaca, who waited for her husband for twenty long years, while he fought in the Trojan war, and then sailed the seas in search of his home for another decade. Her Odysseus.

Chapter Text

I stared at the man opposite me, and I could hear the blood rushing through my veins as I lost all sense of reality. My limbs grew weak, I was losing my vision, and I knew my heart stopped beating for several seconds. The uproar in my mind was of a magnitude I cannot describe in words. The last six months flashed before my eyes, in my awestruck state I tried to remember every conversation, every look, every single word ever spoken between us. I must have been sat petrified for a long time, too long, for through my blurred vision I saw Captain Nemo arise. His voice was thick with emotion - anger, sorrow, disbelief, and resignation - when he spoke.

“Very well. Then I shall have to marry the two of you myself, being the captain, for rest assured - neither of you are ever leaving the Nautilus!” 

He left me there, and finally my mind gave out. 

I do not know at what point I awoke, for the line between consciousness and oblivion was mingling as I laid there on the floor where I had fallen. When I finally realised where I was, and that what had happened had been real, the first rays of sunlight were already streaming through the water. I let go of the cramped grip around my knees, and tried to sit up. It took a while to regain control of my muscles, but soon I was able to stagger out of the lounge. I did not know where to go in this metal prison, and wandered the gangways aimlessly. I did not encounter a single soul, or at least, I don’t think I did. In that case, I must not have taken any notice of them. I found myself somewhere near the engine room when I heard us surfacing, and the hatch opening. I started walking towards the central companionway, too dazed for anything but a wish for fresh air filling my head. I don’t remember actually stepping onto the platform, but I regained some semblance of awareness after a time. I was hugging my knees tightly again as the strong wind was whipped through my clothes and hair, the rough waves spraying me with salt as they crashed against the Nautilus, and I saw the clouds growing darker overhead. I watched as a petrel soared above, and followed it with my gaze. How much time passed I do not know, but I was vaguely aware of a voice addressing me. Whose? I did not know, but it told me I was going to catch a cold if I did not go inside. A cold? I could not feel any temperature at all. I did not want to go back inside, but a set of strong hands dragged me to my feet, and wrapped a jacket around my shoulders. I followed along, for what strength had I to protest? The person led me to my cabin, and told me to get out of the wet clothes. I did as they said, but then heard what must have been a curse as they turned back around. 

“I meant put on dry ones as well! By God, Eleonora, what has gotten into you?” they admonished me as they pulled a new shirt over my head, before fervently rubbing my arms and back to warm me.

“Get into bed, you are not well,” they said in a stern voice, and I did as told. They tucked me in gently as I stared at the wall. Sometime later, I heard the voice discussing something with another one, and felt a hand on my forehead.

“Elle n'a pas de fièvre,” the new voice stated. 

“Chérie, what is the matter?” it then asked me, but I was far, far away. 

I emerged from the fog little by little, and soon heard the sound of someone rising from a chair behind me. Pierre’s gentle hands grasped my face, and his expression was that of intense worry. I frowned in confusion. 

“What’s wrong, mon ami?” I asked, and he breathed out a sigh of relief, but then his expression turned almost accusatory.

“Ne m'effraie plus jamais comme ça!” he admonished me, and let me go. I sat up on my elbows, and watched as he paced about the room. 

“What happened, chérie? Monsieur Kumar said he found you sitting half frozen up on the platform in this horrible weather, and you have been unresponsive since!” 

I felt guilty that I had worried them so, but I had had no more say in it than either Pierre or Kumar. I did not know how to explain my state. There would be no point in telling Pierre what had happened last night - was it last night? - since it would not change anything. Except the fact that I would live in regret for the rest of my life. Circumstances, the opponent Kumar had been playing against in his game of chess - for I was now sure I knew what he had meant - had won. Against all odds, Captain Nemo returned my feelings, and I had to live on, forever knowing that it wasn’t enough. I knew the dangers of loving a man so much that nothing else mattered, and the only outcome of it was a lifetime of sacrifice and self-loathing. Instead, a lifetime of constantly missing him would be my lot. Trying to accept it was more than my weak mind had been able to handle, and yet, it was with this knowledge I had come out on the other side. In a strained, but earnest voice, I gave Pierre the closest thing to an explanation I could;

“I think the true state of our circumstances finally caught up with me after the conversation with the Captain, mon ami. I’m very sorry to have worried you.” 

Not a lie, per se, I just didn’t specify which conversation I was referring to. I knew how Pierre would interpret the words, and hoped they would suffice. It wasn’t too far-etched of a notion, for I could tell he too had been disillusioned by what Captain Nemo had told him, and he smiled sadly.

“Bien-sûr, chérie, I understand.”

“Would you go tell Kumar that I’m fine now, that he needn’t worry?” I asked, desperately wanting to be alone. I wondered if the telepathic link with the Captain was still working, and feared I was not up for the conversation that would follow if that was the case.

Chapter Text

Every moment from then on, I had to stop myself from going to see Captain Nemo, for I feared I would give in to him the moment I did. The danger of running in to him was nonexistent, for he was as invisible as ever before. I withdrew from my friends, and spent most of my time alone, ever wishing to be away from the temptation of throwing all my principles away. Kumar had not yet come to see me, and I still wondered if he knew what had taken place, or if the Captain had kept it to himself this time. The weather stayed foul that whole week, and the storm threatened to break at any moment. There was no hope of escape in these conditions, and I do not know who lamented it more, myself or Ned Land. I went up to the platform for some respite from the claustrophobic ship’s interior, now that it was no longer lit up by my sun. Watching the billows, and feeling their spray, I gently sang to myself.

As we marched down to Fennerio

As we marched down to Fennerio

Our captain fell in love with a lady like a dove

And they called her name, pretty Peggy-o

Come a runnin' down the stairs, pretty Peggy-o

Come a runnin' down the stairs, pretty Peggy-o

Come a runnin' down the stairs

Combin' back your yellow hair

You're the prettiest little girl I've ever seen-o

In a carriage you will ride, pretty Peggy-o

In a carriage you will ride, pretty Peggy-o

In a carriage you will ride

With your true love by your side

As far as any maiden in the ar-e-o

What will your mother say, pretty Peggy-o?

What will your mother say, pretty Peggy-o?

What will your mother say

When she finds you've gone away

To places far and strange to Fennerio?

If ever I return, pretty Peggy-o

If ever I return, pretty Peggy-o

If ever I return, all your cities I will burn

Destroying all the ladies in the ar-e-o

Destroying all the ladies in the ar-e-o

I do not know how long he had been listening, or if he knew the song, but his questions must have been answered regardless.

“You have made your mind up then, little Ice Queen?” 

I closed my eyes tightly. I could not take this, not now.

“Leave me alone, Kumar,” I said coldly, while keeping my eyes firmly fixed on the surging waves. He did not.

“I do not understand - why put yourself through this?” 

So he did know. Of course he knew. 

“I have no other choice,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady, while maintaining my resolve. Both were close to insurmountable tasks. 

“You do. Otherwise, what was the reason for all this?” Kumar said, his tone pleading, making the latter task even more difficult. He couldn’t possibly imagine how close his argument came to my greatest doubt. 

“Please, priya, it is not yet too late!” he exclaimed, and I squeezed my eyes shut. I would not cry. I would not. Kumar sighed, and sank down next to me. He put his head in his hands, clearly in denial that the game was lost. 

“It is. I am already engaged,” I said through gritted teeth, annoyed with Kumar’s pointless hope. He looked up at me and scoffed.

“You would rather marry a man who will never love a woman?” 

Ah, so he knew that too. I should not have been surprised. Who else could have better guessed it? I saw no point in denying it, and only glared at him. He sighed in exasperation, and shook his head admonishily at me.

“You have never been a coward before, Madam. What has changed?” 

His words made a spark of anger break through my catatonic state.

“A coward? For not abandoning everything I am for someone whose name I do not know?” I snapped. I saw at once in his eyes that he had provoked me on purpose, to get a reaction from me. It made me even angrier. 

“If that is the reason, Madam, I will tell you everything in this very moment, if you spoke true when you said you forgive him,” he proclaimed solemnly, as he watched me intently. His words made my head spin, and my mouth fell open. If I thought the temptation had been unbearable before, it was nothing in comparison to this. I scowled at him in hatred for making me waver in resolve this way, but then deflated. I put a hand on his knee, not so much to comfort him as to support myself. 

“I did mean it, Kumar, but I need to know - why will he not tell me himself?” 

I saw him falter in his determination. He hesitated to speak at first.

“Because he believes that once you find out the truth, you will no longer think him a good man,” he finally admitted, and it confirmed everything I had dreaded.

“Then do you not see… If I forgive him in spite of whatever it is he’s hiding from me, I may come to despise myself for it? The things I have forgiven already frighten me as it is. No, I’d rather not know just how far I’m willing to stray from everything I hold sacred. If that makes me a coward, then so be it,” I told him, my voice anguished. He looked at me for a long while, with an expression of such pain and hopelessness as I had never before seen in him. He arose with heavy sigh, and started walking back towards the companionway, when I heard him stop.

“Please do not give up on us yet, priya.” 

I stayed up on the platform long after this, analysing every argument for and against, turning them around in my mind as if they were colours on a Rubik’s cube. The attempt proved about as successful as expected, and no matter how I tried, I could not get the sides to match. As soon as one made sense, I would turn the cube around, and see the colours all jumbled up on the other ones. It did not help that I was more or less colourblind in the matter, since I was missing so much information. In the end though, I was essentially standing at a crossroads. I could go with Pierre and the others, and live my life in safety, never to see the Captain or his Nautilus again. Or, I could stay, and be loved by him, and live my life in adventure. The price of it being my soul. I would be damned along with the rest of them, as he himself had phrased it. And there was no way for me to know which path to take.

Chapter Text

As I still had not fully made up my mind, I cannot tell you wether I was relieved or disappointed as the storm finally broke during the day of May 13th, thwarting any escape attempt. We were but a few miles from Long Island, but everything outside of the Nautilus had long ago ceased to exist in my mind. The New York of 1868 was as distant to me as the New York of my day. I had been convinced to come out into the lounge by Pierre, where we were now sat together. He was looking out the windows, taking notes, correcting errors in his book, and I was… well, sitting. I do not know how he managed to keep up his energy, but I supposed to him, his research was his escape from being plagued by similar thoughts to mine. I wished I’d had something that managed to keep me as occupied, but I did not. I had only been persuaded to leave my cabin since I thought I ran no risk of encountering the Captain, but I was to regret this immensely when the door to his stateroom opened. He barely glanced at us, and said nothing, as he quickly walked through the room, and shut the door to the library behind him. His appearance had been so sudden, and so unexpected, that I’d had no time to react. I had not seen him at all since… that day, and now I felt dizzy. I wondered if Kumar had been right, that it wasn’t too late, but I pushed these foolish ideas deep down as soon as they emerged. I collected myself somewhat, and saw that Pierre was looking after where the Captain had disappeared to. His expression was longing, and pained. I knew exactly how he felt. 

The storm grew more violent, and the Captain had not yet returned to his room. I cannot tell you what kept me waiting for him in the lounge, even though I knew it was a bad idea to see him again. When the Nautilus was rolling noticeably on the waves, both me and Pierre started worrying that something was wrong. Why were we not diving down, to be free of the billows? After another hour, when this still had not been done, we went to investigate. We came to the central companionway, and saw sprays of seawater entering the open hatch. Exchanging a glance, we went up the stairs, and saw Captain Nemo standing on the platform. He was lashed around the waist to the railing to withstand the surging waves. I turned back around at once, but before I reached the bottom of the stairs, Pierre grabbed my arm. 

“I will stay with him, chérie,” he told me in a grave voice. I looked at him, and saw in his eyes the same sympathy for the man, which neither of us could help but feel, no matter what he did to us. I squeezed his hand, thankful that the Captain would not have to brave the storm both within and without alone. 

Many hours passed by, and the storm grew more and more intense. I paced about the lounge, waiting for Pierre to return, until it got near impossible to stand upright. I flopped into an armchair, and resorted to wringing my hands instead. I was growing more and more worried, and when I saw the first flashes of lightening through the rolling water, I felt the knot in my stomach tightening. What if either of them was struck? The thought had me jumping out of my seat, and I was just about to make my way to the platform to force them both to come down, when Pierre finally entered. He staggered into the lounge, absolutely drenched to the bone, and with a fervent look about him, but the main thing I noticed was that he was alone. I stared at him, my silent question hanging in the air.

“He will not come down! He is determined to brave the wrath of Poseidon, although I cannot imagine to what gain! Chérie, I fear he means to kill himself,” he exclaimed, but his voice turned into breathless dread as he finished his sentence. My eyes widened in horror.

“You talked to him?” I whispered. The professor looked uneasy.

“I… I could not find the words. Even if I had, the Capitaine is like a man possessed, he seemed in silent battle with the heavens, and I’m not sure he would have heard me.” 

He looked at me pleadingly, and I knew what he wanted. I squeezed his shoulder as I hurried past him, having to stop every few meters not to be thrown down by the violence of the rolling motions. I would not let Captain Nemo fight this silent battle on his own, whether he wanted to or not. Pierre had stayed with him in the storm for hours, but nevertheless he was now alone up there. We both loved him too much to let anything happen to him, even if it was his own wish. I would try to reason with him, and if he would not listen, at least stay with him until the storm abated. I walked up the companionway, fervently holding onto the railing, and the hatch flew open as soon as I lifted it. It was the worst storm I had ever experienced, the winds seemed to try and rip the world apart, lightning raining down right upon us with deafening cracks of thunder, and in the midst of this battlefield between Zeus and Poseidon stood Captain Nemo. He was staring into the storm, defiantly, but under that expression I could see great pain in his eyes. My heart sank, and I wished so that I could help him. But whether the pain was caused by me, or by him battling with the reason I could not stay with him, I would not be able to take it away. I almost went back down in defeat, but managed to stop myself. I turned back around, and called out.

“Captain! Captain Nemo!” 

He made no sign that he’d heard me, and I was not sure if the wind had carried my voice away or if his mind was too absorbed in his inner turmoil to have noticed. I took the last few steps up onto the platform, and was immediately thrown against the railing by a great wave, knocking the air from my lungs. I gripped the rail desperately, knowing that if I went overboard, there was little chance of rescue. Slowly, with my knuckles white from the exertion, I inched my way towards the Captain. I felt my grip slipping on the wet metal, and hooked my arms around it instead. 

“Captain Nemo!” 

No reaction still. I was crying now, fear building in my chest. Would this be the end of both of us? No, I could not let that happen. I tried to suppress my fear, and spurred on by the thought that he might be harmed, I straightened up and roared between the thunderclaps;

“Odysseus!” 

He turned to the sound, and his eyes went wide at the sight of me. In the next instant the Nautilus jerked violently between two opposing waves, and I lost my grip. I was thrown forward, was falling through the air, but before I could go overboard I was caught in a strong grip. The Captain held me to him tightly, and I grabbed onto him with the same desperation I’d held onto the rail with. I felt him bury his face in my hair, as I rested my head against his chest. In his arms, the thunderous roar of the storm seemed further away, and some foolish notion I had not been able to get rid of told me I was safe here. Perhaps, in his arms, I would be able to brave any storm. Perhaps, without him, I would drown no matter where I was. I held on a moment longer than I should have, for by each second that went by, I was losing the will not to forgive and forget. With supreme effort, I loosened my grip slightly, and lifted my face to his. Despite the heavy rain, I could see that he was crying, the tears mingling with the raindrops rolling down his face. How was I supposed to fight against both of our wills combined? What did any of my principles matter, if they meant I had to be parted from him? I reached up, and gently stroked the wet locks from his forehead. I could not make a decision in that moment, but I knew we had to go back inside, before the storm claimed either, or both of us. Putting my hand to his cheek, I tried my best to smile a little.

“There are no sirens here to be heard, Odysseus. Won’t you come inside?” I pleaded, and he gazed into my eyes, seeming to look for some answer in them. A small spark of hope lit within his, and his face softened. He put a hand of top of mine, and placed a kiss onto my palm. I was given no time to react to any this, before he untied himself.

“Let’s go, don’t lose your grip again!” he told me gruffly, and we carefully started making our way back along the platform. Each time a wave violently rocked the submarine, he stopped and held me tightly to the railing. I was no longer scared, but still my heart was beating violently. We made it back down safely, and I tried to meet his eyes, but he was looking straight ahead. I followed him as he headed towards the lounge, stumbling along while he walked with cat-like grace down the gangway. As soon as we entered the salon, he continued straight to his stateroom, and me and Pierre were both left dumbstruck as the door shut behind him.

Chapter Text

I will not put myself through the tedious task of further describing my state of mind in those days following the storm, and thus spare you from reading it. We still saw no more of Captain Nemo than before, and since veering away from the coast, we were also deprived of Ned Land’s company. The latter meant I had lost the foremost spokesperson for our escape, and I felt my conviction waver more often than I would have liked. I could not shake the feeling that had enveloped me, shielded in the Captain’s arms from the wrath of the elements.

As we crossed the Atlantic, we got intimately acquainted with the newly dispatched transatlantic telegraph cable, and although I could not match Pierre’s enthusiasm over seeing it, I did marvel at this feat of human engineering. By my day, it would long since have been joined by its fiber-optic cousins. We followed this north-eastern route towards Europe, and did not need to voice the question to understand that we were all thinking the same thing - would the Nautilus take us all the way back home? 

I still had the strength to refrain from seeking out Captain Nemo, since his very presence was enough to cloud my mind of all logical thinking, but this strength would prove insufficient to keep me from opening the lounge door when I once more heard the mournful tones from the organ. It was late at night, perhaps the only time he left his stateroom, since we never saw him anymore, and I had gone to the library to look for a new book. It was the only way to keep my mind from racing until I went mad, and so, I would read and read until I passed out from exhaustion each night. The music seemed, as that time six months ago, to encompass all the sorrow of the world, borne on one man’s shoulders. It beckoned me as irresistibly as last time, and I soon found myself standing in the lounge, listening to Captain Nemo’s agonised plea, heard by no one but myself. And so, it fell to me to try to ease his pain, as I always would, whether it was in my power to or not. This time I did not cower before the task, but went up to him and wrapped my arms around his shoulders. If he had not heard me before, he made no show of surprise, but he did play a single key out of tune when I leant my head down, and pressed my cheek to his. I closed my eyes, and stayed still as he played on. ‘I love you, I love you, I love you’. The phrase was the only thing that existed in my mind in this moment, and I wondered if that was enough for him to hear the words, since I could not say them out loud. I felt like Mary Magdalene, in Jesus Christ Superstar, uncertain of everything but the depth of my feelings. Captain Nemo continued playing for a long time, and I hoped he would never stop, for when he did, we would have to face reality again. He too was well aware of this fact, and seemed as reluctant as I to let the moment end. When the music did inevitably stop, as even he was unable to delay further, I did not let him go. He reached up his hand to grasp mine, and I thought perhaps he would loosen my grip, to once again hide away in solitude, but instead he spoke up.

“Would you have chosen differently, under other circumstances?” 

I should not have been surprised to hear he did not share Kumar’s optimism, that it was not yet too late, but hearing him say so still pained me. I sighed deeply, and finally letting go I sat down on the bench next to him, but facing the room so that I would not have to see his expression. I leant my head on his shoulder, wishing for everything but the two of us to be different, and let out a childish plea in vain hope that my almighty Odysseus could make it so.

“If you could only change the circumstances, there would be no choice to make,” I said, although I knew to what effect his reply would be. He took a long time to answer, and hope still flickered within me. 

“Not even God himself could change them,” he told me in a hard tone of voice, but I could detect the emotion underneath it. I was naive, foolish, inexplicably unable to accept this truth, so I persisted against all better knowing. 

“Perhaps not God, but you could. I meant what I said, I would forgive you anything,” I whispered, and knew that it was true. Rather that, than having to give up my love for him. Anything would be less painful than that. I wondered if Kumar had not been wrong, that the forgiveness was not the truly cowardly action. Captain Nemo arose suddenly, and took a few steps away from me, crossing his arms. I watched his powerful figure, and was still thankful I did not have to see his facial expression, for I was sure it would haunt me to see him struggling so. Would it have been easier for him to hear I did not love him? I don’t know, but I would never be able to tell such a lie. 

“I cannot ask you to. You were right, you will come to despise yourself for it, even if you could forgive us,” he then said, his back still turned to me. I should have known he had talked to Kumar, and now I regretted my honesty with him. I tried to ascertain his exact meaning, for his voice revealed nothing, but I could not. 

“What if I would rather despise myself than not forgive? It should be my choice to make,” I told him in exasperation. He was so close, and all I could have ever wanted with him. I could not give up so easily, without even knowing why, could I? He appeared to be done with the conversation, for he stayed silent, but I was not. If there was even a chance we could both find the elusive middleground, I would fight to do so. Feeling the tight knot of dread in the pit of my stomach, and the tears burning, I still spoke up.

“It will not matter, I promise! Please, I lo-” 

Before I could finish my sentence, that had been so unthinkable to utter just moments earlier, he was on the floor in front of me, pressing his hand to my mouth, a fire burning in his glassy eyes. 

“Do not give promises you can’t keep! I will keep mine, and in mere days, you shall have the answers to questions you will wish you never asked!” 

With that ominous assurance, he was gone, before I could even grasp what had happened. 

There was no more to be said or done but wait. He had told me I would finally have my answers, but the days until that moment dragged on like eons. When exactly it would happen, I did not know, nor did I know what he had meant. I could only guess that some event would transpire that would explain their mission, and by the way he had stopped me from proclaiming my feelings, I had to assume he meant I would regret it once that event had taken place. And he was perhaps, after all, better equipped to make that judgment, since he had the full story. Well, not quite actually, since he did not know there was more reason for me being here than a simple coincidence.

Chapter Text

The Nautilus did indeed bring us back to Europe, and I watched the lighthouse on Fastnet Rock in the distance with a feeling of impending doom. This feeling was further increased as we, for some inexplicable reason, seemed to travel on the surface of the waves, rarely diving despite the nearby densely populated land. I listened as Ned, reappeared in the proximity of the shore, questioned Pierre incessantly on where we might be headed. I was sitting further away on the platform, humming a tune to keep my mind busy.

Do you know the land of green

Its rough and stormy sea

Do you know the island of the rain

Do you know the land of green

Its wondrous scenery

Do you know the island of the rain

Many of us had left their homes

Never felt the westwind blow again

He said with lonely eyes

They once had worked upon the land

That now is in some stranger's hands

He said with angry eyes

If Captain Nemo thought I had no clue why him and the other men onboard had left the world behind, he was wrong. Although, not in my wildest, most horrid dreams could I imagine what had truly taken place, and what they were capable of in their quest for revenge. 

On May 30th, Pierre found me again up on the platform. I stared at the sight of my beloved England, only miles away, in quiet resignation. 

“Land’s End. A poetic name, is it not?” I told him, pointing to the easternmost tip of Cornwall as it passed by. 

“Oui, bien-sûr, chérie,” he said warily. He was no fool, he could tell something had changed in the last week, but was as always too kind to question me.

“Just a few miles south of it is the most breathtaking beach, the water is such a striking turquoise no image could capture it. Nanjizal, its called. It sounds like something out of a storybook. Very fitting, really,” I continued, thinking back on some of the happiest days of my life. My former life. I furrowed my brows in bitter memory of it. Pierre studied me, but said nothing, only putting a compassionate hand on my shoulder. I put my hand over his for a moment, before going back downstairs with a deep sigh. 

I went into the lounge, deserted as it now always was, unless I or one of my companions were here. I wondered if it was only my mood, or if the very atmosphere of the Nautilus itself had gotten gloomier. I grabbed a bottle of Palmata liquor from the side table, and seated myself with it under the window. I thought of the times I had not been drinking alone, but with the crew, sharing in the laughter and camaraderie. Those times seemed distant now, some fear of me still lingered whenever I reluctantly went down to the mess hall. People no longer greeted me, or invited me to sit with them, as they had before. I wondered if my invitation to join their ranks had been rescinded by now, but I had not spoken of it with either Kumar or the Captain. The latter, for obvious reasons, and the former because I only saw him occasionally, as he came to take the survey on the platform. During these occasions, he would sometimes glance at me, but never speak. He looked miserable, and I often thought of our last conversation. ‘Do not give up on us yet’, he had pleaded with me. Had he meant that I should hold out hope because there was hope to be found, or because I was the last one among them who could have any? Yet another question the imminent event might answer. 

“Planning on finishing that all by yourself?” 

I looked up from my grim musings to find Ned leaning against the door frame. We had spoken very little lately, no strange consequence of the current circumstances, but I would not mind a bit of his company now. 

“I was, but I could be persuaded to share,” I told him with a joyless smile. He nodded, and came to sit down on the floor, leaning against my chaise-loungue. I handed over the bottle, and he took a big gulp. 

“The first thing I’ll do, if we manage to get out of this alive, is go into the first bar we see and buy us all a round of real drink,” he stated resolutely. We were already veering too far west for an attempt to be made this evening, and I can’t tell you if I was relieved or disappointed. No, they would both be the wrong description, for although I dreaded finding out the nature of the secret that had made Captain Nemo stop me from professing my love, I was burning with need to finally know it, but the words are too meek for what my feelings were. All I can say is that I was fearing both options equally. I could of course not tell Ned of any of this, so we settled for drinking together in silence.

Chapter Text

On the last day of May, Pierre told me that he had seen the Captain. He had been up on the platform himself to take our bearings, and Pierre said he had looked ‘gloomier than ever’. Hearing this pained me, and filled me with anxious certainty that the day of reckoning was upon us. The minutes dragged on like hours, while I waited for… well, what I did not know exactly, only that what was to take place would determine the course of the rest of my life. When evening came without change, I was almost mad from trepidation, and I could tell Pierre was well aware that something was amiss. I stayed with him, fearing I would lose my mind completely if I had to be alone in this ship that had become - or perhaps had always been - my prison cell. I followed him onto the platform the next day, this fateful First of June, a hundred and twenty-nine years before my birth, in breathless, dreadful anticipation. As Pierre had described the day before, Captain Nemo came to take the sun’s altitude. He took no notice of us as we watched him aim his sextant to the sky, standing as still as any marble statue ever did. The calm of the sea was almost eerie, foreboding, empty but for a large steamship on the horizon. Soon, the Captain spoke these words, perhaps as much to himself as to us;

“It’s right here.” 

He went down the companionway, and I looked after him as he disappeared. Two crewmen appeared, to close the hatch, and we were forced to go back inside as well. I followed Pierre, as devoid of will as a useless lapdog, as he went into the lounge. We heard the ballast tanks filling, and we dove straight down, the propeller stilled. A few minutes later, we landed on the seafloor, and the lights went out as the window panels opened. To starboard, we could after some time make out the vague shape of a shipwreck, long since buried under the waves. I could not imagine what this could possibly have to do with the mission, and Pierre seemed just as confused as to the purpose of our visit, when we both startled by Captain Nemo’s voice behind us. He slowly, with none of the usual enthusiasm of his storytelling, told us the history of this ship before us. 

“Le Vengeur!” exclaimed Pierre in breathless wonder, and the name stirred a memory within me. I used to work in Greenwich, and had sometimes gone to the Royal Museums if I finished early. There, at the National Maritime Museum, was a large oil painting depicting a battle during the Glorious First of June, featuring this very ship we now saw. Avenger of the People was its full name.

“Oui, monsieur. Le Vengeur! Un beau nom,” murmured Captain Nemo with a fervor to his voice, and crossed his arms. Both me and Pierre turned to look at him, as he now reached out his hands towards the wreck, a fire burning in his eyes. In Pierre’s, I saw dread, mixed with awe for this man, and I wondered what feelings my expression conveyed, for I could not make sense of them myself. We slowly rose to the surface again, the image of the Vengeur disappearing below us, and no sooner than we breached the waves, than a hollow explosion was heard. I was still watching the Captain, and his expression changed not in the least, even as Pierre spoke to him. 

“Capitaine?” he asked, frantically looking between us. I was frozen in a catatonic state - knowing that the moment I had so dreaded was finally upon us. When neither of us answered, Pierre rushed out of the lounge, back towards the central companionway. I kept staring at Captain Nemo, wondering if I would have rather he drugged us and locked us away again, than find out what I was about to. But it was far too late for that now. 

“Are you the Avenger of the People, Odysseus? Is this to be your Glorious First of June?” I whispered, and finally he turned to me. He said nothing, only looked at me with a sorrowful expression. I felt the bottomless fear digging deeper into the pit of my stomach.

“Are we to go down with our ship as well?” I breathed, and his brows furrowed slightly as his expression turned almost compassionate.

“No, not us,” he said, and I felt myself pale, dizzying from the implication of his words.

“You did not simply incapacitate that ship back in January,” I said, wide-eyed with fear of the man before me. It was a statement, not a question. In truth, I’d known all along that the noises I’d heard could not have been from just taking out the rudder. We’d passed right through its keel, I had just chosen not to understand it. I did not want to understand it. Not until this moment. He only looked at me, but I did not need him to tell me I was right. More explosions were heard, and Captain Nemo’s face grew hard and merciless. He turned to leave, and walked with the sinister resignation of a general before battle, or an executioner to the gallows. I do not know what power moved me in that moment, but I followed him, as silent as a shadow. I was behind him as we entered the platform again, and I saw Pierre, Conseil, and Ned up there. They were all looking to the ship, no longer distant, and Ned was just raising his arm to wave his handkerchief in the air. Before I knew what was happening, Captain Nemo had felled him to the deck with an iron fist, and my hands flew up to cover my shocked cry. 

“Scum! Do you want to be nailed to the Nautilus’s spur before it charges that ship?!” he shouted, shaking Ned, who stared at the Captain with unbridled horror. And he was horrible to see. The hate emanating from his whole being was enough to scare off demons. I dared not approach until he let go of Ned, and finally turned to the ship instead. I rushed forward to drag the poor man away, and helped him up as the Captain spewed curses at his enemy. We clutched each other tightly, watching over a dozen crewmen coming up on the platform, and they all bore the same expression of pure loathing. I barely recognised their faces, they could not be the same men I had loved so dearly. Captain Nemo had unfurled a black flag, same as the one he had planted at the South Pole, and it was now flapping in the wind, which seemed to have been conjured solely by this man’s rage. Looking at Pierre, who was frozen in place by the same terror as the rest of us, he told him in a gruff voice;

“Descendez!” 

When he did not react, the Captain repeated his command vehemently;

“Descendez, vous et vos compagnons!” 

Pierre seemed to regain some composure, and exclaimed with dread in his voice;

“Monsieur, allez-vous donc attaquer ce navire!?”

“Monsieur, je vais le couler,” sneered Captain Nemo at him, confirming what I already knew. Still, the statement made in such icy indifference made me sick to my stomach. To Pierre’s credit, he did not give up.

“Vous ne ferez pas cela!”

“Je le ferai. Ne vous avisez pas de me juger, monsieur. La fatalité vous montre ce que vous ne deviez pas voir. L’attaque est venue. La riposte sera terrible. Rentrez.” 

The Captain spat out the last word, and Ned, his arms still tightly wrapped around me, started ushering me towards the companionway. Pierre still did not give up, and his desperation to somehow consolidate the current event with what we had both felt for so many months led him to search for some reason behind all this.

“Ce navire, quel est-il?” he asked quietly, almost pleadingly.

“Vous ne le savez pas? Eh bien, tant mieux! Sa nationalité, du moins, restera un secret pour

vous. Descendez.” 

The tone of Captain Nemo’s voice made it clear he would not ask ‘nicely’ again, and Pierre turned away in defeat. Once Ned has assured himself our other friends were following, we finally went below. We could hear the Captain continuing to shout at the approaching ship, while the four of us remained utterly silent. Pierre staggered down the gangway, and Conseil tried to intervene, but Pierre made a dismissive gesture before disappearing towards his cabin. I was in a state of complete shock, and was made to come with Ned and Conseil. We were sat quietly in their cabin for a long time, each of us contemplating what Captain Nemo had told us. I felt so betrayed, so unbelievably desolate with the situation, yet - how could I have expected anything less than this after the way he had tried to warn me? It was my own useless hope that had betrayed me, not him. I should have never held onto it so desperately, but what choice had I had? What choice did I have now? The ship was not yet sunk, was there still a chance to persuade him not to take out his terrible need for vengeance in this way? But how? Pierre’s attempt had been met with anger only, and I wondered if there was anyone in the world he might listen to. Had Kumar’s feelings on the mission changed again, he who had been so against it after Thomas’s needless death? I could sit still no longer, I needed to do something, anything, and I rose up in a fervor. Ned and Conseil startled, and looked at me. I was just about to leave, when the door flew open, revealing Pierre in a state of distress. 

“Nous fuirons!” he exclaimed, his eyes glassy. 

“Pierre, has something more happened?” I asked, taking his arm and making him sit down. He stared at me with a fervent look, but then waved me off. 

“Right, so we’ll escape,” Ned stated resolutely. “Where’s that ship from?” 

“I have no idea. But wherever it’s from, we must try to get to it before the Nautilus attacks! Perhaps if you are onboard it, chérie, the Captain will spare them,” Pierre said, taking my hand, his eyes pleading. I wasn’t sure if I agreed, for from what I had seen, his hate for his enemies was far greater than any love he felt for me. A despicable part of me was more upset with this than anything else. I grabbed Pierre’s hand with both of mine.

“I don’t think so, mon ami, but regardless we must try to stop this. We must try to speak to the Captain again!” I said, barely keeping my emotions in check. 

“It is no use, chéire, he said-” Pierre interrupted himself, seeming to rethink his next words. 

“He will not be persuaded, would not even hear me out.” 

“Then it’s decided. We’ll try to signal that ship as soon possible, and if we have to - go down with it!” Ned exclaimed, and none of us could any longer find a reason to protest. 

Chapter Text

Several more hours passed with no change to our situation, but we could do nothing but wait. We could not eat, not sleep, not talk except for a few words to confirm that indeed, nothing had changed. The Nautilus would slow down, and we would be on high alert, but as soon as the battleship had caught up sufficiently, we would gain speed. Surely we must be far enough from the wreck of the Vengeur by now? So what was Captain Nemo waiting for? After we had lived what felt like a lifetime in this suspended anxiety, Pierre rubbed his hands over his face, and declared he needed to take some air. When he had not returned after many hours, I was too scared not to go look for him. I worried he had tried to confront the Captain again, whose patience might have run out by now, but I found them both on the platform, not speaking to one another. I don’t even think Captain Nemo noticed us, he was watched the pursuing ship so intently, and Pierre watched him in turn. The sky was turning the faint pink of sunrise, and nothing in the calmness of the sea witnessed of the horror about to take place. I went up to Pierre, and took his arm. 

“Did you try speaking with him again?” I asked, my voice barely a whisper. 

“Non, chérie, not again,” he sighed, as if doing so might have killed him, and I understood. He was the only person nearly as disillusioned as myself, but in his superior intellect, he had already given up his hope. I still had not. I exchanged a glance with Pierre, and he did not stop me as I slowly started approaching the Captain, as careful as if he were a wild animal. 

“Captain?” I called gently, but he made no show that he had heard me. I called again, but had to come all the way up to him, and put a hand on his arm before he reacted. 

“Will you forgive this also?” he asked, trying to hide his pain under an even tone of voice, but it did not fool me. His eyes did not leave the ship.

“Spare them, and I will not have to,” I said quietly. His expression turned harder, but he did not reply. I sighed, but refused to give up so easily.

“It’s not too late. Whatever they have done to you, whatever you have lost, you do not need to lose yourself as well. Let’s come away from here, and let me be Penelope, if that is what you want. I would be happy for you to remain Odysseus, you need not tell me anything, if only you give this up!” I pleaded desperately, my voice wavering as I grasped his shirt, and the tears that had remained absent until that point finally sprang forth. I saw bitter tears in his eyes as well, but he refused to look at me. 

“I told you not to give promises you cannot keep. I am lost, and you to me. Such was the way from the beginning,” he said, and his voice was unwavering in its anguish.

“But then… why am I here?” I whispered, even though I had not meant to ask the question out loud. I don’t know what he made of my strange statement, for I could no longer look at him. I let go of the tight grip on his shirt, and staggered backwards. Pierre hurried over, and put an arm around my shoulders. 

“We must leave, chérie,” he whispered in my ear. The first glimmer of daylight broke the horizon, and the battleship resumed its cannonade. Just then, I saw Kumar coming up the companionway. He looked worn and haggard, unrecognisable from the jovial man I had known, but resolute. With him was a dozen more crewmen, and they started dismantling and putting away anything protruding from the sleek hull, turning the Nautilus into an instrument of destruction. They all avoided looking at us with the same determination as their captain. Pierre led me downstairs, and together with Ned and Conseil, we went into the lounge. The red rays of sunrise were filtering in through the windows, and the water outside looked like blood in its light. After less than an hour, the Nautilus slowed down, and the explosions grew louder as the ship approached. 

“Mes amis, le moment est venu. Une poignée de main, et que Dieu nous garde!” Pierre stated in an emotionless voice, and I was in no state to refuse. So this was how I would part ways with Captain Nemo and his crew. Perhaps it would be just as well if I did not survive this. But no such mercy was to be awarded us at this time. We heard the sound of the hatch closing, and before we had a chance to leave, also the sound of the ballast tanks filling. We fled into Pierre’s stateroom, clutching each other’s hands as we filled with desperate dread. I knew what was coming, and my heart was beating in my chest. We felt the Nautilus gaining speed, accelerating more and more, before we felt the jolt of the impact. Pierre let out a yell, and I listened to the same horrible noises that I had heard in January, as we cut through the battleship’s keel as if it was no more than soft butter. I felt sick to my stomach, and sick to my heart. I do not know what possessed me to follow Pierre as he rushed out of the room, but I did. Entering the lounge, we found the man there, he who was judge, jury, and executioner, this vengeful spirit of the seas. He stood still, eerily so, as he watched the men he had condemned fighting for their lives aboard the sinking ship. Who were they, who had made themselves guilty of a crime so awful it deserved this sentencing? I could not imagine what it might be. The three of us stared out the window, as the Nautilus slowly followed the doomed men into the depths. Suddenly, there was an explosion from the compressed air inside the vessel, and the violence of it made us swerve away. As the wreck started descending quicker, I felt Pierre grab my shoulders, and I went to bury my face in his chest, but Captain Nemo took hold of my arm and jerked me forward. Grabbing my face, forcing me to look, he hissed in my ear;

“Can you forgive this also?” 

I stood petrified, my heart stopping its terrible pounding for a second, and I found no words, not even thoughts, in reply. I could only look on as the mastheads, crowded with desperate sailors, came into view from the surface. The surge of the water following the sinking ship prevented any of them from swimming away, and soon, they had gone to the bottom of the sea. Only then did the Captain let me go, and Pierre gathered me to him, or I think I would have collapsed. Finally looking away from his deed, Captain Nemo turned around, and staggered into his stateroom. There, on the wall, was the portrait of the young woman with her two children. He stretched out his arms to them, and sank to his knees, before dissolving into sobs.

Chapter Text

From then on, all light and sound was gone from the world. It took several days before any of us spoke with each other again, bar a few words. If I saw the crew, they appeared only as apparitions, no more real to me than the ghosts they ought to have been if I was alive when I should. The commander of our vessel was seen no more, nor his chief officer, and the conductor of our escape had reached the end of his wits. Conseil kept watch over him day and night, and Pierre and I did the same for each other. After that fateful second of June, no more positions were fixed on our chart, the last one putting us at the mouth of the English Channel. Continuing north, the knowledge that we must have passed by not all too far from the Swedish west coast was almost too much to bear, and only through Pierre’s silent compassion and understanding was I able to refrain from a suicidal attempt to swim home. But was it my home? I knew the people living on my island in this day, but they did not know me. I was their great-great-grandchild, and had seen them only in ancient photographs. The world I knew was not this one, all I knew here was the Nautilus. ‘A familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven’, is that not how the expression goes? If the chance was now given, was I strong enough to leave? Another expression came to mind. ‘Hope is the last thing ever lost’. Put the two of them together, and you will understand my thoughts in these final weeks of our imprisonment. My prediction had come true, I was still searching for a way to forgive Captain Nemo, and I did despise myself for it. I could not make my mind up on whether it was weakness or strength which was my torch in this quest, which soon turned into obsession. I would exhaust every possibility, in the struggle not to go mad with our situation. And so, one day in the lounge, I broke the recent tradition of not saying more than a few words together. 

“Pierre..?” I said, my voice empty of emotion by this point. He looked up from his notes, but I don’t think he’d been reading them, since he’d stared at the same page for half an hour. 

“Oui, ma chérie?” 

“Do you know who the people in the painting were?” I asked, wondering if he was able to confirm my suspicion. I did not need to specify what I meant, I knew he would understand precisely. He sighed, and put the notes down.

“I think it must be his wife and children, chérie. That’s what he told me, up on the platform that day, when I went to talk to him. He said he had lost all he loved, his whole family, and homeland, because of whatever nation that ship came from.” 

Despite my catatonic state, and previous expectation of an answer to this effect, I did feel an overwhelming grief at hearing this. I understood - dear God did I understand - this feeling of nostalgia and homesickness for a home you could never return to. ‘Hiraeth’, the Welsh call it, and I know of no other word to encompass the feeling. If there was someone to blame for what had happened to me, would I too not seek revenge on them? For Captain Nemo there was. The other difference between our situations was that there was no future which would bring it all back. My family was not dead, my home not lost, for none of it yet existed. It would again one day. I would again one day, if not in this world. This gave me comfort, in the past enough of it to be glad of my new life, but Captain Nemo was doomed to continue his odyssey, sailing the seas aboard his Flying Dutchman for all eternity, never to return to Ithaca. Pierre was studying me, and I wondered if my face had betrayed my feelings. It must have, for he pulled me close, and kissed my forehead. 

Keeping occupied was no easy feat, and I would spend every day in the library at this point, continuing my desperate search for answers. The mind map of Captain Nemo’s life I had started almost instantly had been slowly building over the course of our stay aboard the Nautilus, and although the details given had been few and far between, I did know some things by now. I scoured the books for clues, and would get Pierre to help me out, both for myself and him, since anything was preferable to falling into a state of thinking of The Circumstances. We had found no books in a language either of us read that gave us anymore clues yet, but we had nothing better to do, so kept at it all the same. I think Pierre must have been as desperate as I was to redeem the man somehow, to find out that the men onboard the sunken ship had deserved their fate, no matter how unlikely it was. Especially now, that no chance of escape would be afforded for the foreseeable future, since we were travelling in completely haphazard ways amid the Arctic seas. Neither of us had felt imprisoned while we both admired Captain Nemo so, and I know we were both longing for those simpler days of endless wonder for him and his underwater miracles. 

One day, Pierre thought he might have found a description which vaguely resembled what we knew of the Captain, in a book containing a description of a Polish noble family, but written in German. Despite my doubt of this being his origins, Pierre wanted to confer with our German expert before drawing any definite conclusions, but we could of course not demand that Conseil leave Ned alone in his state. We decided I could offer to sit with him instead, if they were both amenable. I knocked on their cabin door, and opened it at Conseil’s invitation. 

“Conseil, voulez-vous aider le professeur à faire une traduction à la bibliothèque?” I asked, and after I assured him I would stay with Ned, he left at once. Conseil had taken on his duties of this suicide-watch as selflessly as he did everything else, and although me and Pierre had at first spent time with them, we both got the feeling that we were not wanted. Initially, Ned would speak to us, then, he would answer questions, but before long, he said nothing at all. I could not blame him, he must feel betrayed by the way we had dismissed his suspicions of Captain Nemo in favour of our admiration. I wondered if he had been right from the start. His black eye had faded by now, but I doubted he counted that as the worst thing the Captain had done to him. I sat down on Conseil’s bed, studying Ned, but he only stared up at the ceiling. He looked gaunt, his eyes hollow, and I knew Conseil was not being overly cautious to be watching him every moment. I thought of all the times he had cheered me up during our long months aboard, and decided to employ some of his tactics.

“Ned, do you know the difference between a cock and a submarine boat?” 

No answer, not even a recognition that he’d heard me. 

“There isn’t one. They’re both long, hard, and full of seamen.” 

Still no reaction. Fine, I’d try something else. 

“Speaking of seamen, you know when we were discussing availability versus preference… What if I told you I have some experience on the subject?” 

I thought this might peak his interest, but it did not. I sighed, and went over to him. Sitting down on the edge of his bed, I looked at him, but he would not meet my eyes. I had been where he was, and I knew if I could somehow draw him out from his catatonia, he would feel better, at least for a little while. Feeling something is after all preferable to feeling nothing. I laid down next to him, putting my arm over his broad chest, and thought if he threw me off the bed, it would at least be a reaction. He did not, but instead drew me closer. I sighed again, in relief. So he did not hate me. 

“Ned..?” I asked after a little while. He did not reply, but I hoped he was listening now. I tried a different approach. 

“What’s that short for? Edward?” 

He did not answer immediately, but then told me in a quiet voice;

“Yeah, but my father was Edward, so it always felt sort of strange being called that.” 

I lifted my head to look at him, but his face had not changed. I smiled a little, before putting my head back down.

“It’s a good name though. I like it.” 

He didn’t say anything, only gave me a squeeze. I wondered if we would ever be able to laugh together again, like we used to. It didn’t seem likely, at least not while we were still aboard the Nautilus.

“I miss you, Ned,” I said simply, but I think he understood my meaning. He sighed.

“I miss me too, your highness.” 

We were silent again, before he spoke up.

“What sort of experience was that you meant then?” 

I chuckled a little at this. So he had heard me.  

“Let’s just say kissing women is a lot less prickly than kissing men, don’t you agree?” 

I thought he would be shocked, but without missing a beat, he was the one to shock me instead.

“Depends on if we’re talking upstairs or downstairs,” he said, and I lifted my head to stare at him, mouth agape, and he could not help but grin at my reaction. It took me a couple seconds before I could come up with a reply, his so wholly unexpected under the circumstances that I’d been left dumbstruck. 

“... Well, I meant upstairs, but by all means, do tell me of the differences downstairs!” I finally said, laughing, and his grin turned mischievous. 

“Would be easier to show you rather than tell,” he said, and I shrieked in mock outrage.

“Alright, I think you’re sufficiently cheered up, Mr. Land,” I huffed, shaking my head as I started to rise, but he grabbed my wrist, his expression serious again. 

“How ‘bout upstairs, then, if you really want to cheer me up?” 

His blue eyes were wide and earnest, and his tone no longer jesting. In fact, he’d sounded quite heartbroken, and I now stared at him, trying to ascertain what this could mean. 

“Ned…” I began, having to look away from his pleading face. “I can’t-” 

“Only a kiss, your highness, and I promise I’ll be cheered up for a lifetime,” he interrupted me before I could protest further. I glanced back at him, meeting his gaze, and thought it was really a small request, after everything he’d done for me. I looked into his eyes a moment longer, before laying back down. Putting a hand to his cheek, I pressed my lips to his as our eyes closed. Ned wrapped his arms around me tightly, and deepened the kiss, a hand in my hair. I found I did not mind - in fact, I found it quite nice. Perhaps I had needed a distraction from all the awful things happening around us as much as he did. After a long moment, he broke away, and looked at me. There was still a tinge of sadness in his eyes, but a small smile played on his lips.

“Something to remember me by in Paris,” he then said, and I smiled sadly. At least he had not given up completely.

“Even better than the bracelet,” I stated, and gave him another, gentle kiss.

Chapter Text

It must have been three or so weeks after the horrible attack, and it was long since I had seen anyone at all but the four of us. I no longer went down to the mess hall since that awful day, but shared Pierre’s dinner every night instead. I don’t know if it was our lack of appetite, or if some kind soul among the crew had thought of me, but the food did always seem to be more than enough for the both of us. We sailed through the perpetual daylight outside, and I realised it must be almost Midsummer. This far north, we would yet again experience the midnight sun, as we had at the South Pole. If things had been what I wished they were onboard, I would have insisted we celebrate this pagan holiday we have honoured for millennia in Sweden. Me and Oskar could have taught the others more of our ridiculous drinking songs, and the dances to go along. But thoughts of the solstice, and the fertility rituals under the bright green of early summer, was as distant as anything else in the world in our gloomy, anxious yet apathetic existence. I had resorted to reading through the newspapers, the ones I could understand, for none of the books had so far given us any answers. But on this day, the last before the great disaster changed everything, an answer was given. I was skimming through the articles, looking for anything and everything that could be even remotely tied to Captain Nemo’s fate, and I found it. A small article in The Times of India, from 1862, with the headline ‘Violent rebel leader escapes Ross Island’. It read as follows;

The former raja, Dakkar of Bundelkhand, has escaped Ross Island Penal Colony, where the known insurgent was serving out his life sentence for his part in the Sepoy Mutiny. Also known as ‘The Butcher from Bundelkhand’, due to his unusually sadistic nature and actions against Company men, he is considered highly dangerous. Any information on his whereabouts that lead to an arrest will be rewarded with the sum of £500.

I stared at it for several moments, not even daring to blink for fear it would disappear before my eyes. I reread the name over and over again.

“Pierre?” I called, and the shrill tone of my voice made him immediately put down the book he’d been studying and come over.

“Qu'est-ce que c'est, chérie?” he asked in an urgent tone, and I pointed to the article. 

“How would you say this name?” I breathed, needing confirmation that I was right, since I’d never seen it in writing before. He leaned over my shoulder, and frowned.

“Dakkar, non?” he said questioningly. Yes, that had to be it. ‘Dakkar’. Prince Dakkar. I think I must have lost all sense of reality for a moment, but regained consciousness as Pierre was patting my cheek, steadying me. I grasped at his shirt in a fervor, staring at him with wide eyes. I saw his frown ease, and he paled, as his eyes widened to match mine. He sank down onto the nearest sofa, and stared into space. We were silent for a long time, trying to come to terms with the fact that our hopeless search had finally yielded some result. Pierre broke the silence first. 

“How do you know?” he said, his tone even, despite the turmoil he must be feeling. 

“Kumar. He called him it, that day on the platform in January, the last time…” 

I did not need to finish my sentence, Pierre would know what day I meant. He met my eyes, seemingly still unable to take it all in. I arose suddenly, and started pacing the room. 

“Then he would not tell me what it meant! I thought it was a word in their language, and he called me an imbecile… My God, he was right!” I exclaimed, striking my forehead with a sudden laugh. I went over to Pierre, sitting down next to him, and took his hands in mine. We only looked at each other for several moments, basking in this unexpected success of our impossible mission.  

“We found him,” I said, shaking my head in disbelief. “After all this time, we know who he is!”

“I can scarcely believe it,” Pierre said, his eyebrows raised in the same surprise. “You were right then, chérie, he is from India. And a raja at that!” 

“Or at least he was. You told me he said he’d lost his homeland,” I said, rising to look at the article again. 

“This Sepoy Mutiny, have you heard of it?” I asked while frowning. Now that we had laid this corner piece of the puzzle, we could begin to form the full picture. 

“Oui, bien-sûr, that was the Indian war of independence from British rule. It was some ten years ago now, but you know of course the terrible outcome for the poor rebels. The war was over in less than two years,” Pierre said in a sad voice. I did know pitifully little of the Rebellion, but I didn’t need to be too well informed to be aware of the atrocities committed by the British in India, and shuddered at the thought. 

“And this penal colony? Do you know it?” I said, continuing my dissection of the article.

“Non, I’m afraid not, but let’s find out what it is,” Pierre said, rising as well, and starting a diligent search of the library. I continued looking through the newspapers, skimming through them again now that I knew what I was looking for. I could not find much, but one headline caught my attention. I had read it before, several months ago, but at the time I had no idea of its significance. ‘The Butcher from Bundelkhand still at large, despite intense two year search effort’. Now that I reread it, I remembered thinking last time that I hoped that man was still free, and how the nickname must had been undeserved. Perhaps it was, but it was not completely made up. With a pang of guilt I realised that’s what I myself had called Captain Nemo after the ordeal with the whales, and now I understood his reaction. I was glad he had not yet loved me then, or my words would have hurt him even more. 

Despite our vigorous search, we could not find anymore clues, nor was Pierre able to find any information on Ross Island, only its location in the Andaman Sea. Comparing it to the log book, we saw that we had not passed by too far from it after that first collision in January. We resorted to putting together what we already knew, and to draw what conclusions we could from it. 

“The ships must have both been British then. That’s who has taken everything from him, and presumably the rest of the crew share similar feelings,” I stated, having returned to my pacing. “And that is why the Nautilus sailed along the English coast in May! He wanted them to know we were there. That warship was sent out to hunt us on purpose. Perhaps there were more of them, and that was only the first one to find us. But then, why would we flee, rather than take on more of them? Do you think they’re done? Have they had enough of the killing?” 

My hopeful dreaming was immediately shot down by Pierre, who looked at me with an anguished expression.

“Chérie, you saw the Captain. Hate such as his has no end, his search for vengeance will never cease. We would be foolish to hope for anything else,” he said, gesturing for me to sit down with him. His words felt like a punch to the gut, and I sank down onto the sofa, my shoulders slumping. 

“How can you be sure, mon ami? From what we now know, his actions may not have been unjust, but he may have realised it will never lead-” 

Pierre interrupted me, cradling my face in his hands.

“Eleonora, enough. I am glad we understand now, and I agree that we have no right to judge him, but nothing in essence has changed,” he said sternly, looking into my eyes with sorrow in his. He was right, of course, but I found it hard to accept. Even after everything that had happened, after showing me who he was, what he was capable of, and throwing away my love when I had offered it, in favour of his hate, I still hoped for the future I had dreamt of. Now I knew who he was, my Odysseus, and it had changed nothing. I felt tears welling up in my eyes, and Pierre pulled me close into an embrace. 

We were awoken in the darkness in my cabin, where we had slept together every night for the past three weeks, neither of us bearing the proximity of Captain Nemo in Pierre’s stateroom. 

“We’re going to escape!” came Ned’s low voice, as he leant over us. Pierre sat up, and turned on the bedside light. 

“When?” he asked warily.

“Tonight. Nobody seems to be standing watch on the Nautilus. It’s like the whole ship is in a daze.” 

He was right, we might as well have been alone onboard.

“Will you be ready?” he asked us with a fervent look, and Pierre glanced over at me. I felt too hopeless to put up any argument, and he turned back to Ned with a nod.

“Oui. Where are we?” 

“In sight of land - I saw it through the fog this morning, twenty miles to the east.”

“What land is it?” Pierre questioned him, still with some wariness in his tone.

“I have no idea, but whatever it is, we’ll take refuge there!” Ned answered desperately, almost pleadingly.

“Oui, Ned, oui,” Pierre conceded with a sigh. “We’ll escape tonight, even if the sea swallows us up!” 

Ned sat down on the bed, breathing out in relief. He agreed that the sea was rough, but in his despair he promised us it would be no match for the nimble skiff. He even assured us that he’d managed to furnish it with some provisions without the crew’s knowledge. 

“Don’t worry, your highness, we’ll make it safely to land!” he said, patting my knee. I didn’t tell him that I couldn’t care less if we did or not. Not for my own sake, at least. 

“We’ll be ready when you are,” Pierre said resolutely, and I reluctantly nodded, feeling the nausea threatening me. Ned hesitated for a moment, before adding;

“What’s more - if they catch me, I plan to defend myself. I’ll fight them to the death.” 

My breath hitched, even though I should have foreseen this. 

“Then we’ll die together, Ned mon ami,” Pierre told him, and I thought my heart would stop. I glanced frantically between them. The prospect of either of them dying at the hands of the crew, when I cared so deeply for both parties, was unthinkable. My old fears rose up to the surface again, and I started hyperventilating. Pierre said something else to Ned, who left us, before he put his arms around me in a tight embrace, shushing me gently. 

“Tout ira bien, ma chérie,” he assured me, but he had no way of knowing that! 

“Nothing will happen to you,” he said, as if that would help. What sort of life awaited me if they were killed? No, that would prove more than I could survive. 

Chapter Text

I stared at the necklace, as many times before, yet with very different feelings this time. I no longer had to wonder if the man who had gifted it to me felt something more than friendship, but what little good it did me now. It would have been better if Pierre had been right, that he had loved only the sea, for the rest was true. His heart was filled only with vengeance, and this was too painful to bear. That is why I was leaving. Not because of what he had done, or what I’d seen, but because he’d never give it up. I did not know how long I would survive in Paris, forever parted from the Captain, but I owed it to Pierre to try. If I could not bear it, he would understand. I hoped he would, at least. Looking at the gemstones, I struggled with what to do. Should I bring it with me? But William’s words rang in my ears, that I would sink like a rock wearing it, but I did not think of them in a literal sense. No, I would not need a physical reminder of Odysseus in my new life, I might sink anyway. I put on my dress, thinking it would somehow be more appropriate once we reached civilisation, as well as the warm fur coat, and realised I had very few belongings to take with me. The conch shell could not be brought, and Ned’s bracelet I was as always already wearing. I did not want to bring any of my own drawings, especially not the ones of the Captain. But wait, Pierre’s drawings! The one of the crab I would leave, I did not need that reminder, but I would take the portrait. Perhaps one day, I could look at it, and realise the dream had been reality. I took it down from the shelf, grabbed the box with the necklace, and with one last look at my cabin, I closed the door to join my fiancé in his room, to await our fate together.

“Will you put this with your notes, mon ami?” I asked, handing him the drawing. He was busy sorting through them, deciding which ones were most important, and nodded absent-mindedly, taking it. I sat down on his bed, and resorted to wringing my hands while he packed. I fiddled with his ring on my finger, and it felt unusually uncomfortable. I listened intently for any noises from the room next door, but heard none. I tried to grapple with the idea of knocking on the door and returning the necklace, but could not bring myself to do so.  Me and Pierre said very little to one another, but our feelings must have been the same. At six o’clock, a knock at the door to the gangway announced that dinner had been delivered. We shared it as usual, but ate with great reluctance. Half an hour later, Ned Land came into the room, and said we would not see each other again before our departure. We were told to meet him and Conseil by the skiff at ten o’clock. He did not wait for an answer before leaving, and we had no more assurances to give.

“I will check our heading,” Pierre announced after a while, and I followed him into the lounge. I brought the necklace box with me, and as he went up to the instrument panel, I went over to the organ. I set the box down on it, before carefully caressing the keys. I felt Pierre’s hand on my shoulder.

“Should we not say goodbye?” I stupidly asked, against better knowing. 

“You know we cannot, chérie. Better we don’t see him again, so he does not suspect,” he told me gently. So, that moment by the window, when he had forced me to watch the ship sink, would be the last time I ever saw him. ‘Can you forgive this also?’. The words echoed in my head, and a tear rolled down my cheek as I closed my eyes. ‘Yes, I can. I understand,’ I thought, before Pierre squeezed my hand, bringing me back to reality. We walked about the room, taking in the beauty of its treasures one last time, before going back to Pierre’s stateroom. He dressed in his warmest clothes, and carefully tucked away his notes in them. Then, he went over to the door leading to the Captain’s room, and listened. In the breathless silence, I too could hear muted footsteps through the wall, and I had to dig my fingers into the mattress to refrain from throwing open the door, and flinging myself into his arms. 

Nine-thirty in the evening, I was pacing the room, and Pierre was sitting with his head in his hands, trying to stave off the madness threatening us both in this endless waiting. It was then that we both heard faint chords coming from the organ, and he looked up. Our eyes met with equal terror, realising what this meant. My hand flew up over my mouth, and I was shaking my head in denial. Pierre was at my side at once, gripping my shoulders.

“I cannot… I won’t-” I began frantically, but he interrupted me, his eyes boring into mine. 

“You must, chérie,” he told me in a resolute tone, and I stared at him in wide-eyed horror. How was I supposed to ignore my wish to comfort the Captain’s pain, when I had never before been able to suppress this longing, under any circumstances? The melody was as anguished and forlorn as that first time I’d heard him, if not more. Soon though, I realised I recognised it. It was the song I’d taught him, all those months ago, as we sat together on that bench, our arms barely touching. But it was twisted into something woeful and hopeless now. I was close to throwing off Pierre’s grip, and rush into the salon that very instant, but he held me tight, guessing my feelings. 

“Tout ira bien,” he assured me again, holding me to his chest, but he was wrong. I would leave the Captain, his Nautilus, and his crew, and nothing would ever be alright again. 

We stood there, awaiting that final moment when we had to leave for the skiff, while listening to the most sorrowful music ever heard by human ears. Eventually, I had to cover mine, I could take it no longer, but soon, Pierre tilted my face up, and I was forced to lower my hands. 

“It is time,” he said compassionately, and I could feel the darkness closing in as my vision tunneled, but there was no time to lose now. He took my hand, and opened the door as carefully as he possibly could, but it somehow still seemed to make a frightful noise. We reached the corner door of the lounge, which was plunged in darkness, and as it opened the chords from the organ grew louder. And there he was. My Odysseus, beautiful as ever, even in that harrowed state he had been left in from the weeks of depression. But I was not allowed to go to him, for Pierre ushered me along, quietly making his way towards the library. He practically had to drag me with, all while staying perfectly silent. It took us several minutes, the longest of my life, to reach the next door. Pierre had barely opened it more than a few inches, before the music abruptly stopped. We both turned around, and saw the Captain rising, coming towards us, as ghostly as any supernatural apparition. He was crying, his broad shoulders heaving with sobs. I cannot tell you if he saw us, or if he was too far away in his thoughts to notice the world around him, and neither was I given the chance to find out, before Pierre dragged me into the library in a desperate hurry. But I froze in place as I heard the Captain utter these words, turning my beliefs upside down, and nothing in the world could have made me take another step after that;

“O almighty God! Enough! Enough!” 

“Please, chérie, we must hurry!” Pierre whispered in a frantic tone, shutting the door behind us, but I did not move. He took a step back towards me, and grabbed my other hand as well. I looked at him in resignation, as the tears welled up in my eyes yet again.

“Go, mon ami,” I whispered. He stared at me in disbelief.

“Tell Ned and Conseil I’m sorry. I love you all,” I said, managing a small, tearful smile. Pierre grasped my face, and in my eyes he must have seen that the battle was lost. His face dropped in defeat. 

“We will not go without you, chérie,” he told me, but it was no use. We both knew this was goodbye. I took off his ring, and went to press it into his hand.

“You must,” I told him in an anguished tone. He looked down at the ring, but instead of putting it on, he gave it back to me. 

“It’s yours, always,” he said, his voice so heartbroken I could not help but let out a sob. I put my hand on his cheek, and told him in desperate resolution;

“We will see each other again, mon cher, I promise you. Now go!” 

I kissed him through my tears, before letting him go. He took a few staggering steps backwards, looking at me with such a pained expression as I had never seen on him, before turning and fleeing towards the salvation of the longboat. I turned around also, away from that salvation, but towards my destiny.

Chapter Text

I pushed open the door in cold dread, yet with no hesitation, for there was no going back now. I’d made my choice, for better or for worse. In the light streaming in from the library, I saw the Captain on his knees on the floor, his forehead to the carpet as if in prayer, but his fists were clenched, and he was weeping silently, but with a force that shook his body. I was by his side in an instant, and gently touched his shoulder. He slowly looked up and met my eyes, heart-wrenching grief etched on his beautiful features, and he raised is eyebrows as if begging me to help him. Before I could consider what to do, he threw his arms around my waist and buried his face in it. His sobbing grew louder, as I stroked his hair, caressed his shoulders, and in this immense, shared sorrow I somehow felt at peace. I had made the right choice, for no matter what happened I could not have lived with myself had I left him like this. I held him while he cried, but before long, I heard distant shouting. My heart must have stopped for a second. ‘They’ve been discovered,’ I thought, and felt icy horror trickle down my spine. Oh God, what fate awaited my friends now? But my fear was soon changed for another one, as I could make out the one, chilling word shouted, over and over again. 

“Maelstrom! Maelstrom!” 

I felt my stomach drop. Malströmmen. That mythical whirlpool, off the northern coast of Norway, from which no ship of legend had ever managed to escape. But it was all exaggerated, was it not? I thought of the fifteen kilometer depth of the Atlantic, and the South Pole by the sea, and was by no means sure it was exaggeration in this strange reality. I sank to my knees, and held the Captain’s face in my hands.

“The maelstrom, Captain? Is that where we are?” I asked him, but he did not reply, only looked at me with teary eyes. 

“What are we to do?” I questioned him, but he seemed in no state to answer me. I looked at him in bewilderment, but I could not wait for him any longer. I hoped to God my friends had stopped their escape attempt, or they would surely perish. I placed a quick kiss on the Captain’s cheek, before rising.

“Everything will be fine!” I told him resolutely, before rushing off. ‘Everything will be fine’, I repeated in my head as I hurried along the gangways. I reached the upper corridor, and banged on the hatch that would lead to the skiff. It gave a dull sound, and my heart sank. The boat was gone. Pierre, Ned, and Conseil had gone into the maelstrom. I ran back and threw open the door to the pilothouse, to demand that we try to save them, although how I did not know. I was stopped in my tracks when I found it empty. I went inside, and saw that we were indeed circling the outskirts of an enormous whirlpool, at least a mile wide. I could not see the skiff anywhere. What’s more, I could feel us being dragged closer to the center, the irresistible current turning us slowly. What would happen to the Nautilus if we went under? We would not drown like a normal ship, but we might be smashed to pieces against the seafloor, trapped inside the iron hull. I found myself assessing the situation with prodigious calm, miraculously appearing in the face of true danger. I took the helm, but I could not move it even an inch to starboard, away from the center of the maelstrom. ‘Steer into the skid’, I heard a voice in my head say. I had no idea if the principle applied to this situation, but what choice did I have? It might at least stop us from getting turned on our side. As I steered lightly to port, the wayward turning did indeed stop, and I took a deep breath, thinking of my next move. Where was everyone? I glanced to the lever that the Captain had had me pull when we broke free from our imprisonment in the ice, and thought of what a swivel in the bathtub looks like when you drain the water. It’s wider at the top, isn’t it? So, since we were still quite far from the middle of this awful surge… I wasted no more time thinking, and pulled down the lever. I heard the ballast tanks filling, and waited in anxious anticipation. Beneath the surface, I lost all sight in the white waves for several moments, before the surge did indeed seem to calm down, the further down we dove. I fervently pushed the button I had seen the Captain use to increase the speed, and heard the Nautilus’s propeller working desperately, the hull shaking, while I moved the wheel to starboard, inch by inch. It was working, we were steering away! To port, I could see the furious underwater tornado stretching its greedy arms for us, but we were almost out of reach. I pulled the lever back to neutral, we did not need to sink further down. The further away from the maelstrom we got, the more we picked up speed, and soon, the resistance in the wheel was nearly gone. I still dared not go up to the surface, if the current there was strong enough to pull us in again, so I navigated the swift ship underwater, around the terrible surge. I could not yet think of the fate of my friends, or I would lose all composure, so I stood at the helm in stoic indifference, until we must have been miles and miles away from the maelstrom. Even then, I dared not leave the wheel, which felt dull and jittery at the same time in my hands, but I felt the breakdown approaching, and the tears burning behind my eyelids. My blurry vision soon made it difficult to see, and by the time Jakub and Kumar appeared at the door, the tears were streaming down my face. They looked at me with such bewilderment I would have thought they’d seen a ghost, but I could only sigh in relief, and staggered down the steps and away to my cabin. 

I must have passed out from sheer exhaustion after crying for so many hours, and do not know how long I slept. My dreams were fitful and terrifying, as I saw my friends dying one horrible death after another after detaching from the Nautilus, and when I awoke, I felt even worse than when I fell asleep. My head was pounding, but I could not have cared less. Pierre was dead, Ned and Conseil with him. They would never see the freedom they had so longed for, and I hoped there was a heaven where they had found peace after meeting their horrible end. I had never known any men more deserving of that eternal grace. Although, they had been ready to die in their attempt, and somewhere in my endless grief, I found some comfort that it had not been at the hands of the Nautilus’s crew. My friends would never again be imprisoned, but were free in death. If there is a God, I hoped he would let me honour my promise, and that I would see Pierre again. He was in Heaven, but I wondered if I would ever go there, or if I was now forced to sail the seas of this unknown world aboard our Flying Dutchman until the end of time.

Chapter Text

I have no idea how much time had passed when I heard a knock at the door. I’d been staring at the wall for so long I’d forgotten anything else existed, and found that my mouth was too dry to form any words. The door was opened slowly despite me giving no reply, and I turned my head as if in a daze. 

“May I come in?” 

Captain Nemo’s face was earnest and uncertain, far from his usual regal expression. I tried to tell him yes, but started coughing instead. He was by my side with a cup of water in an instant, and held it to my lips. I fell back down once I’d drank it, devoid of any strength of either body or mind. 

“Will you not take something to eat?” he asked gently, caressing my cheek. I stared straight ahead, I couldn’t understand the point. Pierre was gone. I heard the Captain leaving, but he came back before long, and I heard him set a tray down on the bedside table. He sat down on the edge of the bed. 

“Have some tea, you’ll feel better,” he said, and I did not protest, even though he was so unbelievably wrong. He propped my pillow up against the iron headboard, and helped me sit up. I took the cup offered with my shaky hands, and the warm liquid did actually revive me somewhat. The Captain gave me some seaweed bread with the anemone marmalade, and I had it in small bites, and did not find it as flavourless as I had expected. It was good, and he looked immensely relieved when I finished the other slice as well. Then we were silent for a long while, neither of us knowing what to say. 

“You stayed,” he then said, quietly, barely breaking the silence. His eyes were full of wonderment when I met them, as if he could scarcely believe it himself. I looked at him for a moment, then took his hand with a sad smile.

“Of course I stayed,” I said, my voice a little hoarse still. I saw tears welling up in his eyes, and he brought my hand to his lips, and kissed it with what I can only describe as reverence. I looked on, but I wasn’t ready for this. Not yet. I needed more time to collect myself, so I withdrew slightly. He was understanding enough not to look hurt, but arose, and went to take his leave. In the door, he turned his head, and said in a voice thick with emotion;

“You saved us all. Once again.” 

I do not know what feelings my face betrayed, but I answered in a bitter voice;

“Not all.” 

The Captain froze, and turned around fully. He seemed to hesitate for a moment before speaking.

“They may have survived. The skiff is absolutely watertight, and ought to have been too lightweight with just the three of them in it to smash against anything with enough force to penetrate the iron. As long as they were not injured, they will have floated ashore safely somewhere in Lofoten,” he said, watching me warily. I was sat breathless for several seconds before I was able to process this information, but when I did, I had to put my hand over my mouth to stifle a cry of relief. I could not stop my tears from running, even when I thought they had all dried up. I felt as though I myself had been saved from the brink of death, as this wave of hope flowed over me. I arose on shaky legs, and the Captain caught me before I had a chance to fall. I gripped him tightly as I repeated, over and over again in breathless wonder;

“Thank you, oh, thank you!” 

“Do not thank me, God knows it is by no help from me if they have made it,” he said, his voice dripping with self-loathing. He was right of course, and if they had been killed, it would have been because of him, but I would not even have a chance to realise this before I was given the explanation that would absolve him from this too. He sat us both down on the bed again, and made sure I was listening, gripping my chin to make me look at him.

“Eleonora, there is more reason behind why I would not let them - or you - go, beside the ones I have given already. I’m afraid that even if they have gotten away unharmed, they will face much greater danger once they return home. If it is still your wish, I am ready to tell you everything. You have earned it by much more than I would have ever expected, or asked,” he told me, his eyes intent and imploring. I could only stare back. Just like that, after my months of begging and pleading, he would tell me. Should I let him know that Pierre and I had found out his identity, and some of his background? Yes, of course, I must tell him that, but right then my head was spinning too much for me to form any coherent thought. 

“Have you changed your mind? Do you no longer wish… I will understand if you do not want anything to do with me - us - after all that has happened,” he said quietly, his face yet again earnest and uncertain. The will to assure him was as strong as ever, even in my dazed condition, and I snapped out of it long enough to do so. 

“No, Captain, I do want to know you. And I will keep my promises. All of them,” I added with a meaning look, and saw his eyes go wide with surprise and disbelief. His feelings may have changed, but he would know mine had not. I had given no promises I could not keep, despite his certainty of the contrary. The abyss no longer scared me, for I had traversed it, and made it out alive. And in the end, I had come out fearless of its threats. But I would be a fool to have that conversation with him in my current state, so before he could say something, I continued;

“I expect it will be a long conversation, and I am in no condition to start it right this moment. Would you send for something more to eat, and I will have a bath in the meantime?” 

At first he only blinked at me, but then collected himself.

“Of course. Certainly. At once,” he said, rising. He stood still for a moment, seemingly astonished at my reaction, but then gave a quick bow before exiting my cabin. 

The hot water had been miraculously reviving, and after dressing in clean clothes, and eating the food I found at my desk when I returned from the bathroom, I felt I only needed some fresh air. Perhaps the Captain had expected this, for we were laying still on the surface, and the hatch was open. The platform was empty, as was the sea around us, and the bright sun of early summer was shining. Light billows were whipped up by the salty breeze, and I took a deep lungful of air, feeling as if I had been reborn after crossing the river Styx. I was calm, almost unnaturally so, for I now had nothing to lose. Almost nothing. ‘Hope is the last thing ever lost’. If these past weeks had not proven it the most absolute truth in life, I do not know what would. And so, when his voice called me gently while I was looking out to sea, my heart did not leap, and my mind stayed clear. 

“I’m ready, Captain,” I told him, turning around and following him down the hatch.

Chapter Text

We took seat in the library, saying nothing at first, only studying one another. Sizing each other up, more like. But this was not a battle to be fought, but a careful dissection that would leave both of us bare to the bone. I was thankful for my resolve, for I still feared I was the one with the most to lay bare. Especially since I had, unbeknownst to him, began his dissection already. Although I had no idea how to tell him this. 

“Would you start, Captain, for I fear your questions will be more numerous than mine?” I finally told him, and it was not an unjust assumption. His story would be bloody, and devastating, and I would not want him to have to linger on it longer than necessary, whereas I had to tell him about atoms and Voyager 1. If he believed me, that is, but I kept that fear at bay for now. He arose, and started pacing about, crossing his arms. For a second, I worried he would demand I start, but that was not the reason.

“Eleonora, I’m afraid I don’t know where to begin!” he exclaimed, throwing his arms up. I smiled softly. He was more nervous than I.

“Why don’t you start at the beginning, like David Copperfield?” I joked weakly, but then decided I’d better share what I already knew, sooner rather than later.

“Your name is Dakkar, you were born a raja of Bundelkhand, and the British took everything from you,” I stated, in a much more serious tone of voice. I watched on in compassion as his face dropped, and he stared at me with an expression of such bewilderment as I can hardly describe. He staggered back to the sofa, and sank down onto it. His face in his hands, he asked me in a muffled voice;

“How long have you known?”

“Not long, we only found out the day before the maelstrom,” I said, my voice still calm. He looked up, still with the same expression on his face.

“We? Kumar told all of you?” he asked as the blood drained from his face. 

“Kumar? No, Pierre and I spent every waking moment since… well, the last three weeks looking for you. And we found you. Although, I suppose we wouldn’t have unless Kumar had said your name that one time,” I added with a bashful smile. 

“I read about you in the paper,” I said, nodding to the table in the center of the room. I wondered if I should tell him that Kumar had indeed offered to tell me, but thought perhaps that was best left alone for now. The Captain stared into space for a moment, before taking a deep breath. 

“So only you and the professor are aware of who I am?” 

“Yes, and I highly doubt he would tell the others. He loved you very much, you must know that,” I said in a sorrowful voice, no longer seeing the point in keeping it hidden. Even if he had survived, they would never meet again. And frankly, I was too tired to keep any more secrets. I would tell the Captain everything, weather he wanted to hear it or not. Captain Nemo - or Dakkar, I supposed, although I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to call him that - looked quite shocked at my confession.

“He did?” he asked, genuine wonder in his voice. 

“Of course he did. I thought you knew already!” I said, almost admonishingly. Every word I uttered seemed to come as a complete surprise to him, which left me perplexed. He was usually miles ahead, forseeing every possible outcome, yet none of this he had expected. 

“And your engagement?” he questioned, and I realised I would have to give a more detailed explanation, since he was apparently not able to guess any of the things I thought were obvious. I looked down at the ring, which I was still wearing, unable to even think of removing it. 

“Real enough, I suppose, although it would have been a marriage of convenience. Not that we did not love each other, you know we did - do,” I corrected myself, “- but as friends only. I could see no other option, after all that had happened.” 

I was perfectly calm while telling him this, having somehow accepted the state of things, and finally speaking freely was a relief beyond measure. The Captain was sat in silence for a long moment, while trying to take in this information. 

“Then I understand that part, but what I cannot understand is this - if you already know who I am, then why did you stay? Out of compassion?” he said, frowning in confusion. I found myself matching his expression. He could not be unaware of my reason, I had been perfectly clear on several occasions. He could not think I had stayed only because I felt sorry for him, could he? Before I had a chance to think what to answer, he came to kneel before me, a fervent look in his eyes. 

“Eleonora, why are you still here? Why did you not go with them?” 

I shook my head in bewilderment, but I had no problem telling him again, if he truly was in the dark.

“Because I love you,” I said, these simple three words flowing off my tongue as if I had not tried so desperately to fight them for so long. His eyes were glassy and wide, his lips parted in surprise. I could not understand why, when I had told him before, even though he had not let me finish the sentence. He rose up, and backed away from me. Even when I had thought I was ready for this, his action still hurt me, and I cast my eyes down. 

“I know you do not wish to hear it, since you have changed your mind, but that is my reason. I cannot go back to pretending otherwise,” I said quietly, trying to keep my voice from wavering. His answer was not what I expected. 

“‘Changed my mind’? I love you more every day that goes by! You are the most incredible woman I have ever met, and by God, if there was a chance you could return my feelings I-” he interrupted himself, and turned away from me. “I know you pity me, but I never thought your compassion extended far enough to truly forgive what you have seen, what I have done, even now that you know part of the reason why. If I was a better man, and circumstances were different, there is nothing in the world that would…” 

Here he stopped again, as if he was unable to utter those final words. I was staring at the back of him, and watched as he ran a hand over his face, and only through his distress was I able to keep any composure myself over his confession. He loved me still. He loved me. He must be made so see I felt the same, if that was the only obstacle still in our way. I arose, and carefully approached him. 

“Odysseus, everything I have said is true. You musn’t doubt me, for I have no more ways of proving it. I loved you from the beginning, when you were more spirit than man in our eyes, but I love you more truly now that you are human.” 

I walked in front of him, grabbing his shoulders, and he looked down at me, wonder in his eyes. I met his gaze with unwavering determination, and told him in absolute earnest;

“Nothing you have done has lead me to stop loving you. Even if you are the god of war. If you are Mars, then I will become Venus, if that is what you want!”

Captain Nemo stared at me, awestruck, revenant, disbelieving, but a hopeful fire seemed to burn away any doubt, at last. He lifted his hands to my face, slowly, carefully, as if he feared I would disappear into thin air, and held my gaze without blinking out of the same fear. He hesitated for another second, before he bent down, and kissed me.

Chapter Text

It will come as no surprise to you that this was the true ‘before and after’-moment of my life, even more so than finding myself aboard the Abraham Lincoln, a hundred and fifty-eight years backwards in time. If I thought I had ever known peace or euphoria before this moment, I was wrong. If it was not for this I had been transported through space and time, I would never know why. Against all odds, against time itself, we loved each other. If that miracle could be true, so could any other. When I opened my eyes, as if seeing for the first time, the world around me seemed brighter, and in the center of it, was him. He looked at me, tears streaming down his face, in stunned silence, and ran his fingers through my hair, caressed my cheek, touching me as if he was making sure I was still real. To me, he was more real than anything else I had ever known. My whole countenance must have been gleaming, my love for him shining bright through every fiber of my being, and I had not lived until that moment. I took a small step towards him, closing the final distance between us, and reached my hand up to wipe away the tears from his cheek. His eyes would not let me go, and he did not stop touching me for an instant. The small smile on my lips that I had been unaware of widened. 

“You believe me,” I said simply, for what words could possibly encompass what I felt in that moment? 

“I’m not yet sure I believe any of this is real. Can it be?” he said in quiet wonder, passing a lock of my hair between his fingers. 

“God, I hope so,” I breathed, and pulled his face down to kiss him again. He wrapped me in his arms, and lifting me up, spun us around. I was laughing when he set me down, and he looked at me in joy and love. I had never in my life seen anything more beautiful. His expression alone made it all worth it, and I would go through it again a million times over for this one moment. Through all that is good it the world, it was a long moment, how long I do not know, in which we stood close together, gently touching one another, trying to make up for so much lost time. He kissed my cheeks, my forehead, before finally placing another kiss on my lips.

“Penelope,” he said, the reverence in his voice almost overwhelming me. I could only nod in agreement, before I found my voice again.

“And if you wish to remain Odysseus, I will understand. You do not need to tell me anymore if it is too painful, I know enough,” I told him earnestly, but a shadow passed over his gentle smile. 

“It is painful, but I want you to know everything. I want you to know me, as I wish to know you,” he said, and caressed my cheek again. “Are you ready?”

Chapter Text

We took a seat on the sofa again, before he started his tale, all previous unease seemingly gone, replaced by a calm resignation.

“As you have already said, my name is Dakkar, although the only person who still calls me that is Kumar. I was the only surviving child of the Maharaja of Bundelkhand. My father was a good man, an idealist, but his naive hope and strong will would cost him everything. He wanted to modernise Bundelkhand, and for me to continue his work. He sent me to study in England from a young age, to receive the finest education, thinking it would not only let me fulfill his dreams for our kingdom, but also aid in diplomacy with the British.” 

He paused here, before sighing.

“Eleonora, you have lived in England. Did you take any interest in their politics while there?” he asked in a slightly wary tone, and I understood what he was getting at.

“It is a beautiful country, and very dear to me, but make no mistake - I know the British Empire is evil incarnate,” I assured him, and he seemed relieved at my answer. 

“Well put. It will come as no surprise to you that I agree,” he said, scoffing a little at the understatement. 

“I was not always treated well while I was at school, the Eton boys were not too pleased to have an Indian in their midst, but I endured. Although, had it not been for the fact that I was allowed to bring Kumar, I cannot say for certain that I’d managed. He was the son of my father’s steward, and we grew up together. When I finally finished at Eton, I begged my father to let me continue my studies elsewhere, and he conceded. Kumar and I went to Paris, and life improved immensely. The French were kind, and welcoming, and I spent five happy years at the Sorbonne, before going back to Bundelkhand to be married.” 

We glanced at each other, and I tried my best to remain unphased, hoping I was somewhat successful. I knew this would not be the most painful part of the story to hear. He continued.

“Savitri was only sixteen when we were betrothed, while I was still in France. I’d met her once, when we were both still children, and I was less than enthusiastic over the prospect of an arranged marriage. We had abandoned many of the old customs, but not this, and although she was older than many brides before her, I delayed the wedding as long as I could. But my mother was very insistent, and I knew of course there was no helping it. I needed an heir. She was eighteen when we wed, and I stayed long enough to do my duty. When our daughter was born, I was already in New York, working with some of the brightest minds of our day on the latest technology. In truth, I found an escape from my destiny in the world of engineering, the prospect of becoming Maharaja was daunting. I knew my true calling was to help develop our kingdom, and to rid it of certain customs that can only be described as barbaric, but I could not see myself becoming what my father was. I had doubts, and wondered if I would not be of more use elsewhere. But I was made to come home once more, since I still had no heir. Aishani was four years old by then, and after one look at her I realised I would never leave willingly again.” 

The Captain was staring straight ahead, his eyes slightly furrowed in concentration to keep his composure, but I could see he was struggling immensely. I dared not reach out to touch him, but instead stayed silent, letting him take whatever time he needed before continuing.

“A year later, Nandini was born, and for a few short years, we lived in bliss. I adored my daughters, and neglected my official duties on more than one occasion at their request. You see, they insisted no one else was as good at pushing the swing, or drawing horses for them to colour, and no one else would play their favourite songs as well as I did.” 

He could keep his composure no more, his voice broke at the end, and he hid his face in his clenched fists. No power on Earth could have stopped me from reaching out when I saw him like this, and his words had shattered my heart. I held him to me, and he buried his face in my neck, gripping me with desperate fervor, but I could not help him. I could not bring back what he had lost, only stroke his hair as he wept. 

“Enough, I cannot put you through this,” I whispered. He looked up, but I saw determination in his teary eyes. 

“No, it is essential that you know everything. I will have no more secrets,” he said, and I could not protest if his mind was made up. I would listen, and do whatever I could to help him, even if it would prove pitifully insufficient. However, I dreaded hearing the rest, for I knew what was coming, even if I could not imagine the true horror of it. The Captain took a shaky breath, and went on;

“As you know, tensions between us and the East India Company were growing, as we watched them exploit our country to no end, and leaving death in their wake. We were not human to them, we had no worth apart from as cogs in their machinery. My father had tried his best to come to a peaceful solution, but you cannot meet someone in the middle if they keep stepping backwards. The British did not like his enlightened ways, and saw his opening of schools as an act of war, since education is a weapon in the hands of slaves. They preferred to keep us submissive to their self-proclaimed superior ways, but the belief of this was wavering more and more as time went on. In the spring of ‘57, we heard tell of the sepoys in Meerut standing up to the Company, and realised that the time had come. My father was too old to lead our men, and so, I kissed my mother and daughters goodbye, not knowing it would be the last time I saw any of them. We believed in the uprising, and at first, we were sure of its success. But it would all be for naught. In the end, for every British soldier killed, more than ten of my countrymen lay dead. After the Company took Jhansi, we were forced to retreat to Gwalior, but the Rani, my cousin, died in the battle there, and I was captured and shipped to Kalapani.”

A dark shadow passed over his face as he said the name, and beneath the hate of his gaze I saw genuine fear. I clasped his hand, and he squeezed it, but did not look at me. 

“I survived the journey, but I would come to wish I hadn't. For over four years, I have lived in hell, and the devil’s name is James Walker.”

His voice was seething with hate as he said these words, and a chill ran down my spine. I could surmise that this ‘Kalapani’ must be the penal colony we had read about. 

“The good doctor knew who I was, knew I was the only heir to my father’s kingdom, and moreover, had heard of my work. He had great plans for me from the start. He starved me for near a month, chained up against a tree, then invited me to tea, while the other prisoners were forced to clear the jungle. He had a proposal for me, as he put it. ‘Go back home, do as we say, invent the weapons we tell you to, and you can keep your kingdom’. He informed me that my father was dead, ‘of natural causes’, supposedly, and that I would return as Maharaja. A sham title, being a puppet to the British, and we both knew it. But he held all the cards. Savitri had been taken into custody, or at least that’s what he told me, and I would not be allowed to see her again, for if I died without an heir, my kingdom would revert to the British. But if I complied with his terms, I would be allowed to return to my mother and daughters, for the price of my soul. I could have my family back, what was left of it, if I sold out my people to the Company. It was an impossible choice to make, and I do not know where I found the strength to refuse him. Had I known what lengths he was willing to go to, had I known such cruelty existed, I may have chosen differently. There was never any other outcome than everything going according to the Company’s plan, and now, my wretched uncle ‘rules’ Bundelkhand, or whatever you want to call it. He is happy being their marionette, as long as he can call himself the Maharaja. I assume he let them take whatever manhood he ever had, for I hear he has a young wife, and they would not run the risk of an heir being born. Or maybe his wife was offered the same treatment as Savitri. At one point, I do not know after which refusal, Walker told me she would be allowed to return to me if she underwent ‘a small operation’, but he assured me she could still be ‘enjoyed’.”

His eyes had been distant while speaking, empty as he walked through those horrid memories, but now he seemed to rouse, and looked at me with an apologetic expression.

“Forgive me, I do not mean to shock you more than necessary.” 

I shook my head, wanting to assure him he could speak freely, but I did not know how to formulate the words. Instead, I brought his hand still clasped in mine to my lips, and kissed it gently. His face softened, and he pulled out his handkerchief to wipe away my tears. I had not realised I was crying, I had been listening so intently to the story, but it was not over yet. 

“For months, this went on. Walker would have me unchained from the makeshift pillory, and brought to him, weaker and weaker from starvation each time. Once he realised his offers were no good, no matter how tempting, he changed tactics. The torture did not have the desired effect either, and I believe he had to restrain himself not to cut too deep, and cause me to bleed out. If I died, I wouldn’t be much good to him. On several occasions though, he did not show enough restraint, and the wounds had to be cauterized with red-hot iron. As I lay dying from infection one time, he grew quite desperate, since I would not eat. But the good doctor had a solution even to this. Unlike for some prisoners deemed less important, he took great care to make sure the tube entered my stomach, rather than my lungs, or I would have ‘drowned in milk’, as they expressed it. Oh yes, Dr. Walker had a solution to most problems. But he knew he need not worry that I would kill myself, for he had made it quite clear the Company would have no use for the children of a dead raja. What naivety led me to not fully understand the words ‘use for’ I cannot tell you, after what I had seen. Perhaps it is beyond any father’s ability to imagine his children being tortured, but fortunately my mother was not as foolish. She made sure they were given a peaceful death, before the Company could get to any of them. Savitri was not given the same mercy in their ‘custody’. I only found out years later, after my escape.” 

He stopped to take a deep breath, and arose. I looked on as he went into the lounge, thinking he had finally had enough, and would retreat to his room, but he returned with two glasses of Palmata liquor. I accepted it in silence, and let him continue. 

“For some reason, Walker’s superiors did not think it justified to remove him from his post when he hanged eighty-one men in the same day, for trying and failing to escape, yet what proved too much was when he suggested the prisoners should be branded with their crime and sentence. Or maybe there was some other conflict I was unaware of, but it does not matter. What matters is that he was sent away in October of ‘59, to placate the board, although he kept informed of what was happening in Kalapani, and would give suggestions to the new director on what could be done to achieve their desired outcomes. Even still, his leaving was the best thing to happen to me during all the years there. That, and the Nautilus.”

He said the name as if he was uttering a prayer, his eyes gleaming. I frowned in confusion, but he answered my question before I could ask it.

“At first, she was only a dream, too fickle to grasp, but I had nothing but time to think. She kept me alive, before she even existed, and for many long months, she was all the companionship I had. The idea of her became less and less abstract in my mind, as I realised she could be more than a dream. She could become reality, if only I survived that God-forsaken place. I could build her, and she would take me and my family far away from the reach of the East India Company.”

He spat out the name, word by word, as if it was the most foul thing in the world, and after hearing his story I was more than inclined to agree. 

“Salvation finally came, in the form of poisoned wheat flour. Naturally, this was not a grain given to the prisoners, and so, during the first week of July of ‘62, most of the guards and the officials lay sick or dying. It did not take long for us to realise what we had to do. We broke the chains, and slaughtered as many of them as we could, to give us a bigger headstart. No, that is not the only reason. We slaughtered them because, frankly, we wanted to. At least those few of us that had the strength of body and mind still to attempt an escape. Many, too many, were too weak or broken to even try. They continued on their existence as if they were exactly where they were supposed to be. But those of us that did break our chains, knew we had too flee out to sea, across the Black Water. Experience had taught us that fleeing into the jungle meant another kind of hell than the one we were leaving, since the Andamanese people were hostile and ruthless, and for good reason, naturally. There were some thirty of us that made it down to the dock, expecting we would have to leave on the small boats that carried the Company men between Ross Island and Port Blair, but there was a ship waiting for us.”

“A ship?” I whispered, raising my eyebrows in astonishment, and the corner of his mouth twitched in a small smile. 

“Yes, a ship, and onboard was Kumar, with a band of my father’s men that had chosen to stay loyal to us, to India, throughout the rebellion. They too had lost everything for doing so, for not submitting to the new Maharaja, for not submitting to the British, and they too had sworn revenge on our oppressors. They had sent the poisoned flour, after finally managing to bribe the supplier, and finding a shipowner that would sell them a suitable vessel. The whole operation had taken longer than any of them could have imagined, even after managing to find one another in the aftermath of the war. To this day, and every day that I live, I am beyond impressed and grateful for their efforts, or I would still be in that place now.”

An involuntary shudder ran through him, and his eyes glossed over for a moment. My fingers ghosted across the back of his hand, and he regained focus. 

“Kumar and the others took us across the Andaman Sea, to an uninhabited island off Siam, where we recuperated. Our hatred kept us alive, and little by little, my dream of the Nautilus took on another form. It was too late for her to save my family, so instead, she would avenge them - avenge all our families, and all that we had lost. After the plans and drawings were completed, a group of us sailed to Phukej to place the orders. We had to wait many months for all the parts to be ready, before we could sail back to the island a final time and complete the assembly. During this time, we also sent for the books you see around you, and any other furnishings needed. None of this would have been possible if my mother had not sent Kumar away with all of my family’s most valuable possessions, as a precaution, long before the end of the war. Many had to be sold, most everything else you see in the lounge - my favourite works of art, collected during my time in Europe, that I could not bear to be parted with. I wanted some reminder of the good of humanity with us, before leaving it behind forever. The papers wrote about my escape, as you have seen, but they naturally left out any details that would have reflected badly on the Company. They gave me the name, ‘The Butcher from Bundelkhand’, and I vowed to live up to it.”

A fire was burning in Captain Nemo’s eyes, the same one I had seen as he spewed his hatred over the ship we had sunk, but now I understood it. 

“Once everything was ready, and we returned to the island, every man worked day and night until she was finished. It took nearly a year, but we did it.”

I had questions, many of them, about the specifics of the whole operation, but I did not want him to have to linger on his painful memories for longer than necessary. However, one of them I did have to put forward;

“What happened to the other prisoners that escaped from Kalapani?”

He looked at my wide-eyed expression with his fond smile, and gave me the answer I should have been able to guess.

“You know them all well, my dearest.” 

My heart fluttered at hearing him use such a term of endearment, as I had dreamt of so many times, but his words left me stunned. I had been right about the crew, they all shared the same tales of horror as the Captain, and their deeds could not only be forgiven, but sympathised with. My eyes filled with tears, of relief and compassion, as I was finally allowed to share in their story. I had been right all along, and the nightmare was ended. I had made the right choice. I could contain my feelings no longer, and reached out to wrap my arms around his shoulders. He pulled me into his lap, buried his face in my hair, and held me close while I sobbed.

Chapter Text

Once I was able to regain some composure, I lifted my head, and put my hands on his cheeks. I looked into his eyes, trying to grasp even a fraction of what he’d been through, and felt immensely grateful that he was still here. Very few people on Earth could have survived what he had, and still have the strength of will to go on. He looked back with calm sorrow, and yet a gleam of something more, something hopeful. 

“You understand now,” he said simply, and I slowly nodded, before placing a gentle kiss on his lips. 

“Thank you for telling me,” I whispered, unable to articulate just how much this meant to me, but I hoped he knew. He gave a small smile, and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

“There is still some to tell, if you can bear to listen to it,” he said, and I frowned.

“If I can bear to listen? If you can bear to tell it, it’s very little to ask that I listen,” I assured him, and sat back down on the sofa, but without letting him go completely. He watched me for a moment, as I waited for him to start, but before he did so he caressed my cheek, and kissed me again. I closed my eyes and savoured it with every fiber of my being, trying to put the thought out of my mind that it would soon be time to share my story. I hoped by some miracle he would believe me, for if he did not, I knew not what I would do. The Captain continued speaking, in a quiet voice;

“You must think me a hypocrite, to have imprisoned you and the other castaways with no chance of salvation, after what I have just told you. However, I promise you there is a reason for this cruel treatment,” he held up his hand to stop me from protesting. “No, please, let me at least explain myself before you excuse my behavior. Now, the Nautilus was finally launched in 1865, near three years after our escape from Kalapani. We were eager, too eager, to start extracting revenge on those people who had taken everything from us, and in our conviction that we had nothing to lose, we began our mission instantly. The first Company ship was sank a mere two weeks after our launch, and in our bloodlust we felt triumphant. There were no survivors, and so, no one who could report back what had caused the collision and sinking. But misfortune struck that same month. We met a flotilla southwest of Sumatra, and without hesitation, attacked. Two ships went down, but there were too many of them, and the Nautilus was damaged. Four of our companions died because of our hubris, and we retreated in grief and shame. They were the first to be buried in the coral cemetery, but not the last, as you know. By the time we had repaired the Nautilus, we knew the news of our existence would have reached the Company. I was certain Walker would instantly guess that this was my work, and I fear the sum on my head will have increased significantly because of it. The Company would do anything to get their hands on a machine like the Nautilus. They have never shared their knowledge of us with the world, nor the fact that we had sunken their ships. If they did, we would become a beacon of hope for the poor people they oppress. They would also risk other nations going after us, and accessing the technology before they could. And this is why, in saving your lives, I was forced to keep you here. It was also an insurance policy to keep you all in the dark, if any of you should escape. I’m afraid the Company will go to any lengths to find out what they can, which is why I said your companions will be facing an even greater danger once they make it back home.”

He looked at me with a pained expression, and I tried to swallow the lump forming in my throat.

“But they might keep quiet… I’m sure they wouldn’t-” I tried, bargaining with reality as much as with the Captain.

“It will not matter. The Abraham Lincoln may not have known what it was hunting, but the Company does. When the professor and his companions return home, they will know where they have been all these months, for there can be only one explanation for their miraculous survival. Even if they do not want to reveal anything, Dr. Walker can be very convincing…”

His eyes had glazed over again, and he took my hand in a fervent grip. I squeezed it back, feeling myself pale as I thought of these implications.

“What are we to do?” I breathed, dread seizing me in its grip. His eyes fixed on me with an unreadable expression, before letting my hand go as he got up, and crossed his arms over his chest. 

“The Nautilus needs repairing after the maelstrom, the steering mechanism is damaged, how I’m not yet sure, one of the pulleys might be jammed, or worse. Regardless, we will need to wait until we can land somewhere safe enough to assess the damage before there’s any point in making plans,” he said resolutely. He was right of course, and I tried to consolidate myself with the fact that unless we were able to intervene, an awful fate might be awaiting my friends. That is if they even…

“Do you really think they made it?” I asked in a quiet voice. His face softened as he looked me over. 

“Their survival would be far less miraculous than our one,” he said, and sank to his knee in front of me. “How did you do it, Eleonora? How were you able to steer us to safety?”

I couldn’t help but smile a little.

“Everyone knows to steer into the skid,” I said, and he frowned in confusion. I sighed. “It took a lot of will, and even more luck. I’m not sure I can answer your questions more precisely, for it was mostly guesswork on my part, that somehow worked out. But I had promised you everything would be alright, hadn’t I?” 

Captain Nemo looked at me with something akin to reverence in his eyes again, and shook his head slightly.

“I cannot help but think you must be some guardian angel, sent to save me,” he whispered, and my smile grew wider. Perhaps he was right. If that was so, I would be the last to complain. I put my hand to his cheek, but before I could think what to say, he went on.

“You were right, the Nautilus was able to brave Charybdis, but it should have been me at the helm. I am so sorry, Eleonora,” he told me in a pained tone, and my smile faded. His words made a question stir in me that I, in all the tumultuous events since Pierre left me in the library, had not had time to consider before. 

“How did we end up in the maelstrom, Captain? Was it by accident, or on purpose?” I asked, and my voice was barely a whisper by the end of the question. I felt instantly reassured as his expression turned horrified.

“On purpose? By God, no!” he exclaimed, and sat down on the sofa next to me. I breathed out a sigh of relief, and looked down at my hands. 

“Forgive me, it’s just… Things have been so strange onboard, and I didn’t know if…” 

My voice trailed off, I had no idea how to say what I wanted to without hurting him, but he understood. 

“Ah… I suppose it is not an unjust assumption, but it was indeed completely accidental. You see, Kumar and myself have both been… neglecting our duties, I’m ashamed to admit. No course had been charted, and a mistake was made in travelling through those treacherous waters, but it was most certainly not on purpose. The reason for our absence, and the general low spirits onboard, are to do with our mission. Do you remember the day we were laid in port, when you found us all in the mess hall?” he asked. I looked up at him, and nodded. How could I forget that inexplicable moment? The Captain gave a nod back, and continued.

“As I’ve said, when we first set out, we were all filled with the same hunger for vengeance, and we celebrated the sinking of that first ship in complete triumph. Then, after our losses in the next battle, there was a bitter aftertaste to our actions. I believe we all waved it off as owing only to the battle being less successful than the first one, but then the same thing happened again. For every ship sunk, our victory felt more and more hollow, and our souls more and more empty. The fire was dying down, replaced by nothingness. When Thomas died, Kumar had had enough. He petitioned for us to stop, to set our sights to helping in whatever way we could instead, but for most of us, the thought of vengeance was the only thing keeping us going. But we could not ignore the hollow feeling, and it was decided that once we had delivered the gold to Crete, we would continue on to our home port. There, we would have a final meeting, to debate the future of our mission. Some were against continuing as we had, some for, and since no one can ever leave due to the threat of the Company, we had to reach a compromise. Three months respite, and if we did not encounter a Company ship in that time, we would go to England, and let them see us. I dreaded the idea of you finding out who we really were, I could not bear the thought of how you would look at me, so I took us as far away from any well travelled part of the sea as is possible. But I had miscalculated, and I lost your trust sooner than I had expected. Once the respite was over, I had the idea to find the Vengeur, in some hope that it would reignite the flame for our mission, but it did not. Instead, I watched as we drove you away, the one truly good thing to have happened to us in all this wretched time. Yes, I had hoped you would somehow be our salvation, the way you are able to shift the mood of a whole room to your will, as if bending reality itself. Forgive me, it was too much to ask, but you made us forget all our sorrows in the moments you spent with us, how I do not know. Perhaps because you seemed so free of them yourself. And we took that away from you. I will regret it for as long as I live.”

I stared at him in stunned silence, I could not grasp the magnitude of what he was telling me, but he seemed eager to have it all said, and did not give me time to contemplate it before continuing.

“Kumar did of course tell me this would happen, and tried to dissuade me from continuing on, or to at least tell you what we were doing before you found out for yourself, but I did not believe it would make a difference. I must ask your forgiveness again, for not giving you credit to know your own mind. I know you tried to tell me what you felt, on several occasions, but hope has proven the most dangerous enemy I have ever known, and I could not allow myself to risk it getting hold of me again. Once you saw what we were, what we did, I dared not think you could still forgive. I managed to find an excuse each time you tried to reciprocate my love, at first it was because you didn’t know any better, then I felt it a lie to get me to spare the ship. When I found that you had left the necklace on the organ, I realised some forgotten part of me had still hoped after all, against my better knowing, and that that last hope was now lost too. But then you appeared, and in the light behind you your hair was lit up like a halo… You were gone so soon, that in my delirium I thought I must have been dreaming, or that I was already dead, but it did happen, did it not?”

I do not know what my expression was, if it matched the storm of emotions within me, but I managed a weak reply.

“It did.” 

Captain Nemo looked at me as if to reassure himself I was still real, then his fingertips ghosted over my cheek, down my neck, and he cast his eyes down again. 

“Kumar found me, still in the lounge, and told me what had happened. The others were gone, and you had saved us from the maelstrom. You were still here. It was only then I realised none of it had been a dream. I awoke then from the despair that had been gripping me for so long, had held me in its clutches and made me unable to do anything at all. That small glimmer of hope, that you had chosen to stay, in spite of everything…”

He was now speaking mostly to himself, but the glimpse into his thoughts made me understand his feelings more deeply, more truly than a coherent sentence would have. It still seemed too miraculous to be true, but I could not doubt what he was saying when he spoke like this. He roused from the deep contemplation, and glanced at me.

“I know it is selfish of me to think in these terms, that you were somehow brought here on purpose, for our benefit - for my benefit. Still, you have been my saving grace, and I know I shall never be able to repay you in any way, yet I will try. I cannot insult you again by voicing any doubts of the sincerity of your feelings, no matter how fantastical I find the claim. Therefore, I will love you, venerate you, and give you whatever I can, if you will let me. ”

It would not matter if I repeated every cliché about true love or destiny ever invented, I could still not make you understand what hearing him say these words meant to me. I wished I was as eloquent, to let him understand even a fraction of what I felt, but in the moment words did not exist to me, only the timeless light of our souls together. I was in his arms again, the world around us gone, our lips sealed in the promise of eternal love, and the serenity it gives.

Chapter Text

Still in his arms, our tears of joy now dried, kissed away, replaced by a calm assurance, I listened to his heartbeat with my face resting close to it. If only there was not one last obstacle to brave, the moment would have been perfect. I put my hopes to that he would understand what I would tell him, if he too did believe I had been brought to him for a reason. I took a deep breath, and sat up, cradling his face in my hands. I could feel my tears welling up again, scared that I was about to ruin everything with my honesty, yet I had no choice.

“So now I know you, and it is the greatest privilege I have ever had, but you do not know me yet,” I said, my voice weak from fear, and his expression turned troubled. He wiped away a tear running down my cheek. 

“I do know you, you are the bravest, most ardent woman in the world. As curious as I am, I will grant you the same offer you gave me. It is enough, if you do not wish to tell me any more, I will not ask you to.”

It was beyond tempting to accept, yet I knew I would not be able to keep my secret any longer. He would have to believe me, as unbelievable as it was. I looked down, and shook my head.

“No, I need to tell you, but I’m scared,” I admitted. He turned my face back up to look at him, and his expression was almost amused.

“Why are you scared? What could you possibly have done that’s so terrible, compared to what I’ve told you?” he asked with a gentle smile. “Did you kill your fiancé? One less Englishman in the world would be no sorrow to me.” 

I could not help but smile back a little, I appreciated his joke, but it was of course nowhere close to the truth.

“No, not at all. In truth, I’ve done nothing terrible, except lie to you, but I hope you will understand why. You see, my story is the most unbelievable thing you will ever hear,” I said, raising my eyebrows in some plea for him to understand already. He frowned a little in confusion, and I got up, feeling I had to move about to calm my nerves. I went and got the bottles from the lounge, before returning to refill our glasses. Captain Nemo was waiting silently, watching me as I took a big gulp of the liquor. I stared pacing about, unconsciously mimicking his behaviour before he began his story. When I realised, I could not help but laugh nervously. 

“What if I just settled for being a witch, after all?” I said, but he was studying me intently.

“Unfortunately for you, my dearest, I do not believe in witchcraft,” he answered warily. I stopped my pacing, and returned his intense gaze. Into the abyss once more.

“Do you believe in time travel?” I asked, my voice surprisingly steady. His expression did not change at first, but he did not say anything either, and I could only imagine what emotions were surging through him. We stayed silent for a long while, as he stared at me without blinking. Did he think me mad, or did he grapple with the implications if I was not? I sat down next to him, and sighed.

“Do you remember the date I gave you for my thirtieth birthday?” I asked gently, and after a moment, he swallowed hard.

“February ninth, two thousand and twenty-seven,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. Now it was his turn to rise, and start up the pacing. I gave him a second to collect himself, but my heart was pounding in my chest, and I soon spoke up.

“I’m afraid I have no way to prove it whatsoever, except for some knowledge of a future that may or may not come to pass,” I said weakly, realising how inadequate this ‘proof’ would be. I had no tattoos, I’d not had any fake hair, nails, or lashes when I was in D.C. - what would that even have proved anyway? - and my clothes were cotton and linen, both common materials in this day too. No, I had no material proof whatsoever. I regretted telling him, this had been a mistake. I should have kept quiet. I felt myself dizzying as I thought I had indeed ruined everything, when he interrupted my thoughts.

“Tell me… Is electricity a common medium in the future?” 

I stared at him, he was looking away from me, but his question had given me some hope.

“Yes,” I breathed, with a small laugh. “Yes, it is. There’s not been a day in my life that I have gone without it.”

Was this the key? My, to him, inexplicable understanding and calmness in the face of this brand new invention. He turned to look at me, attempting to conceal his bewilderment, but with little success. I bit my lip, my eyes pleading with him to hear me out, and he seemed to grant my wish. With a small nod, he downed his glass of Palmata liquor, and sat down again. He ran a hand over his face, before speaking up again. 

“And teevee?” 

I felt my mouth twitching in a smile. Perhaps there was a chance after all.

“... Is short for television. They’re moving images and sound, transported through signals in the air, to be viewed on an electronic screen in your home. It lets you see any place or person in the world that has been recorded on a video camera, meaning it takes the images in such rapid succession it appears as though the subject is moving as in real life when they’re replayed at the same speed. The images are then sent from a broadcasting antenna, to a satellite in orbit, onto a receiver at home. Or at least, that’s one way they-” 

Captain Nemo held up his hand to stop me, and I paused, only then noticing he had gone pale. He wasn’t looking at me, but staring into space, his eyes glazed over. I may have gone ahead too quickly. Silently cursing myself, I scooted closer to him, and took his hand.

“I’m sorry. One thing at a time,” I said apologetically, and he turned his face to me, a fervent look in his eyes. 

“Time travel?” he whispered, and I nodded sympathetically. For a second, I was worried he would lose consciousness, as he swayed where he sat, but he managed to keep awake. 

“Do you believe me?” I asked carefully, and his eyes fastened on mine.

“How?” he asked in a strained voice, and my heart sank.

“That part I cannot explain, I’m afraid. It is as fictional in my time as it is now, so I have no idea how it happened. I only know that I was in a museum, in the American capital, to view another submarine, when I came upon a display of artifacts from the frigate Abraham Lincoln. For some reason, beyond my control, I touched the name plate, and the next thing I knew I woke up aboard that very ship, and Pierre was there.”

I now wished I had rehearsed the story better, but in truth, I had never anticipated I would ever tell it. Captain Nemo was listening, trying his best to keep his composure, but I could see the bewilderment, verging on horror, underneath. I had no other options than to continue my recount of this, the strangest event of my existence, and hope he could find it within him to believe me. 

“... and then you took us onboard, and the rest you know. I’m sorry I lied about how I got here, but I had no other choice at the time, you do see that?” I asked, and he nodded absent-mindedly. I did not dare see it as him trusting my story yet, so I put forward my strongest argument.

“As you understand, I have been grappling with the reality of this since the moment I realised it was true, and the only explanation I have been able to come to is that I was meant to be here, like you said yourself. Whatever powers that be transported me here, to you,” I said, putting my hand to his face, and he focused on me again. Neither of us spoke for a long moment, and I felt my tears returning yet again, fearing I had lost him. 

“Please, what reason would I have to make up such a story?! There are a million easier ways I could have explained myself, or better yet, taken your offer and stayed silent, but I will lie to you no more. You must believe me, please, you simply-”

“I do believe you,” he whispered, and I blinked, dumbstruck. “I have seen enough that could have no other logical explanation, but you must excuse me if I need some time to process this.” 

I gave a strained smile, my hand fell from his cheek, and I started to withdraw, but I had misunderstood his meaning, and he grabbed my arm. 

“You really mean it? Your only explanation for being transported through space and time is so that you could be here - be with me?”

I stared at him for a moment, before nodding solemnly.

“It has been the beacon of hope that has kept me going through it all, every challenge we’ve faced. I have had my doubts, but in the end, I believe I was right.” 

His face softened, and his eyes were glassy as he smiled in disbelief. He shook his head lightly, making my heart skip a beat in fear, but I had misunderstood him again.

“So God has granted me forgiveness at last,” he said, his voice full of wonderment, as he held my face gently, and kissed me again. It took my breath away, and all thoughts vanished for a moment, but when I opened my eyes, I could not help but furrow my brow in doubt. Could this really be? Did he really believe me? He must have read my thoughts, and smiled a little.

“As I’ve said, it will take some time to get used to the idea, but I have no reason not to believe you, my love.” 

Another miracle, and even if it was the last one I ever experienced, it would be enough. I let out a cry of relief, and threw my arms around him. He squeezed me tight as I sobbed into his shoulder again, and thought that after today, all my tears would be forever dried up.