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Waking up in the middle of the night was nothing new for Mike, happening more times than he was comfortable with, though it seemed like tonight was different and there was another reason behind his abrupt awakening. And he knew this because the second he rolled over on his side and threw his arm out, he was met with nothing. Empty space that Will should be filling.
It wasn't what he was expecting, and given that he was still half asleep and confused, it took him a decent amount of time to realize where he was and that Will truly wasn't there with him. Where he was, Mike wasn't quite sure, and so with a great deal of effort, he somehow managed to lift his heavy eyelids to see the room around him, dimmed with the shadows of the night that hung heavy in the room.
"Will?" he grumbled to himself groggily, not able to see clearly as he pulled himself into a sitting position, the blanket gathering around his hips as he dropped his face into his hands with a groan. After pushing the heels of his palms into his eyes for a moment, he pulled his hands away to once again reach over for Will's spot, finding the mattress still dented in and still bearing warmth where he'd been lying, indicating he'd not been gone for long.
He knew of Will's tendency to wake up in the middle of the night, whether for a drink or because he was suffering from nightmares, and though they came in waves and typically only lasted for a few weeks, it never made them any less dreadful.
Thinking back on the number of times Mike had been slapped across the face, kicked in the back by a foot, or straight up shoved out of the bed because of how vivid Will's nightmares could get, enough to leave him thrashing and screaming in the night, Mike shuffled towards the edge of the bed.
After doing this for..quite a while and only knowing of two places Will would go after waking up in the middle of the night, Mike dragged himself out of the warmth of the bed that he'd miss dearly, but knowing that Will was likely feeling pretty upset right now, he knew this was a more pressing matter at hand. It was nothing short of heartbreaking, truly gut-wrenching that even years on, Will was still being followed wherever he went, not finding rest even in sleep.
"Will?" he called out once more as he trudged out of the room, dragging a palm over the wall as he moved down the hallway and taking note of the subtle scent of chocolate in the air, using it as a guide as his eyelids fluttered shut every few seconds, heavy with sleep. Upon reaching the kitchen and pausing for only a brief moment when he spotted Will sitting at the table, sitting directly under the yellow light with his hand pressed over his eyes and a steaming mug of hot chocolate in front of him, Mike sighed. "Hey."
In response, Will jolted slightly in his seat before pulling his hand away from his eyes, revealing bloodshot eyes and slightly sunken-in eye bags where sleep clung to him so heavily.
"Mm, Mike?" Will mumbled, boring his fingertips into his temples with a drawn-out breath. "Sorry, did I..?"
Mike shook his head as he moved towards him, taking a seat next to him and pulling Will's hand away from his face. "No, you didn't wake me up," he assured, reaching his other hand up to move Will's hair away from his eyes with a soft noise. "You look exhausted. Another nightmare?"
Will groaned, but nodded, and Mike had a distinct suspicion that it was one of the bad ones that had likely shaken him a little. "Yeah.." he winced, face twisting into a grimace like the sound of his own voice, which was raspy and deeper than usual, brought him a great deal of pain. "Needed hot chocolate for this one."
"Ah, it was one of those ones. Do you..wanna talk about it?"
Will paused at this, his eyes flickering up to meet Mike's for a moment before darting away in what almost appeared to be guilt, and something akin to shame.
And though Mike wanted to press him for details, to unleash the lengthy list of questions and comforting words he'd already conjured up within his mind from the moment he'd woken up in bed alone, he knew that Will would share it with him eventually, and it wasn't fair to try and push him into it when he was so clearly struggling with the simple act of sitting upright. He could be patient with him, so Mike carefully disconnected their hands and said, "Come on, drink your hot chocolate; it'll help you feel better."
Mike pushed the mug closer to him with the back of two fingers, being careful not to spill it everywhere as that would do them no favors. It was still hot, though, which only confirmed Mike's suspicion that Will hadn't been awake all too long, which he was silently grateful for as he didn't want Will to sit here all night with no one to talk to, relieved when Will gratefully curled his fingers around the mug and took a tentative sip.
Mike watched him drink with a little more intensity than was probably necessary.
After he was satisfied, at least for now, Will meekly offered the rest to Mike, who stared dumbly for a hot second before taking the cup to sip at the last quarter that was left, licking his lips afterwards and stifling a laugh at the hot chocolate mustache Will was left with. He looked a little goofy, but that was the funny thing about them. That they could look stupid and act silly together and it only strengthened the bond they had.
After swiping away the hot chocolate mustache from his lips, Will opened his mouth to speak. "It's the anniversary of Bob's death."
That was all Will needed to say for Mike to be able to piece together what he meant.
"You had a nightmare. About your.." Mike's voice faltered at the sudden memory of Hopper carrying Will's limp, lifeless body through the bloody halls of Hawkins lab, and the immense sense of protectiveness he'd felt that was tied directly to his love for Will, that he'd wanted to be the one to hold Will. Pushing the harrowing memory away, he cleared his throat and tried again. "About the Mind Flayer and your..possession."
Will's eyes widened at the words, as if hearing for the first time that he had been possessed for a short while and everything that had happened while he had been, though Mike was well aware by now that there were very few details that Will could recall from that time. His breath trembled slightly, his fingers twitching where his hands were neatly placed on the table in front of him as Mike watched an array of subtle emotions play out on his face, indiscernible with how rapidly they flashed by and how intricate his soft expressions were.
And with that, sensing that Will had nothing more to say and likely wouldn't, at least not until prompted, Mike took it upon himself to try and fill the silence that was hanging between them. He couldn't sit in it any longer and, without even needing to think about it, allowed his words to roll from his tongue with ease.
"I know it gets pretty bad around this time, but it's going to be okay, Will. You're not there anymore, and you wouldn't hurt anyone. We all still love you, and no one blames you for it..Bob, he loved you. You're.." His last statement had been to tell Will that he was still himself, that his mind was his own and was no longer held in the tight clutches of the Mind Flayer, and that he wasn't going to hurt anyone; however, when Will lifted his eyes to meet Mike's own, he couldn't help but hold his tongue, literally squeezing it between his canines with more force than necessary, as he was met with everything that told him that Will was himself, that only Will could portray such light through his eyes alone.
Will had eased slightly under Mike's words, but sensing that he was done, sucked in a sharp breath of air as he rolled his hands so his palms were facing up, revealing those scars that had come from the rope burns where they'd had to tie him down to do the exorcism, leaving scars that were ridged and raised slightly, turned a ghostly white from the time that had passed. There was a long moment as he held his breath, and then, with a heavy exhale, he spoke. "Whenever I see them.." There was another long moment, this one longer than the last before Will gathered the courage to continue. "All I can think is that I hurt all of them, and this is what I'm left with."
"The scars?"
"They're just.." Will started, lifting one of his hands to the light properly so that he revealed his wrist, showcasing the scars that resembled shackles, which wasn't too far off since they were still shackling Will to the very thing that had given him those scars. "They remind me all the time."
In the light, they were easier to see, and Mike felt an odd sense of unease unfurl across his skin as he looked between the marks wrapped around Will's wrist and towards their owner, not entirely sure what Will was getting at. Because while it confirmed his suspicions that Will was being tormented by the memory of Bob's death, in reality, it told him nothing at all.
"They remind you of..him?"
"When they were burning him out of me..the pain was almost unbearable."
Mike couldn't help himself; the memory of the two standing in the pumpkin patch reared up in the back of his mind all at once, and then the memory of being forced to stand back and watch as Will writhed and screamed at the hospital. And so, after swallowing thickly, he softly spoke. "You remember that? The exorcism?"
Will gave him a pained look, but instead of meeting Mike's words with something that may have shattered his heart, he sighed and shook his head. "Not all of it, just a few snippets here and there.." he muttered, "..I remember hearing all of his thoughts, feeling his pain, how badly he wanted..to stay."
His words were slow and deliberate, as though speaking them into existence brought him a great deal of pain and discomfort. Which, as Mike briefly thought about it, made total sense; back then, during the short time Will had been taken from them after spending his last days fighting the possession off as long as he could, Mike had been privy to just how much pain the whole ordeal had brought Will as he'd been glued to Will's side as he helped decipher the true meaning behind the drawings, and he'd been there when the demodogs had invaded. And so, softly, Mike asked, "What do you remember, Will?"
"He was mad that I'd betrayed him. His thoughts..." he paused, holding his breath before sighing and pressing on, "..were awful, to say the least." The disgust and bitter self-hatred were clear in his tone, and Mike could only assume it came from the subtle implication he had made that the Mind Flayer had planned to keep Will at his side for as long as he'd wished, like Will wasn't a living person and only someone to be controlled and kept on a leash.
Which was a harrowing thought. Because Will wasn't like that. In every reality that Mike could think of, there wasn't one where Will didn't deserve absolute freedom, in himself and in his actions. He'd gone his whole life bending to other people's demands and shrinking under the expectations that people had laid out for him, only to have his sense of freedom stolen away from him and forced into doing things that Mike still shivered at whenever he recalled them. "His thoughts?"
Will sighed, dropping his arm against the table with a thud as he tore his eyes away from Mike and set his gaze on the green mug that sat between them. Mike had still caught it though, flashing in his eyes for a short, fleeting moment, the look of grief and anguish. "I could feel you burning the tunnels..see you, actually. I could feel El closing the gate, I could feel the vines burning, and I could feel my own skin crawling whenever I got a bit of my consciousness back while they were burning him out of me." He closed his eyes, screwing them shut as his lips morphed into a grimace before he relaxed a moment later. "It was all happening at once, and it was the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. I.."
He fell silent, and Mike gently prodded him to continue. "I'm listening, Will."
Will's eyes remained closed while he spoke, moving beneath his eyelids. "I sent the demodogs after all of you because I was still part of his army until he left. I only came back after I passed out and woke up with my mom, Jonathan, and Nancy there, and I didn't even realize that I was doing it.." He trailed off, shaking his head. "And all I'm left with is these disgusting things."
Mike was glad that Will had his eyes closed, so he couldn't see the way Mike's mouth dropped open before he pressed his hand over his mouth to conceal it as well as the fact that he didn't know what to say. Because if Will was telling the truth, and there was no questioning it, especially about something so delicate, then it was a whole new sliver of information that Mike had never been privy to before now.
The silence had dragged on for too long, too long for Mike's liking, and mentally stringing his pathetic words together to come up with something to say next, his belated question rolled off of his tongue. "You sent the demodogs after us, and you.."
"..I stopped it at the last second. Told them that getting to the gate was more important and they shouldn't waste time attacking you, which I know was shitty because El was there, but if they hurt all of you.." Will finally lifted his eyelids, gazing up at the warmth of the yellow light above them before moving towards Mike with a tint of self-loathing and shame. "I never would have forgiven myself. I still haven't."
Mike felt a twist of unease pang in his heart all at once. The Mind Flayer had basically had Will under his ugly thumb, trapping him in his own mind, which had been the only thing Will had had during his time growing up, when he'd felt alone. It was a cruel thing, that the only thing Will had for comfort was just the very thing that had kept him caged.
"You saved us, though," Mike stated, before taking Will's wrist in his hand to brush a thumb over the raised bumps, uneven where he'd been fighting so much but not any less significant. "You saved all of us when you broke out of it."
Will smiled. "When your best friend delivers a monologue like that, it isn't easy to ignore." It was the absolute truth, based on the way Mike's words had managed to reach him where Will was lost, bringing him back for only a brief moment but enough for Mike to hold onto hope. "It doesn't feel fair sometimes. It hurt so much, but all I have to show for it is these. Whenever I manage to forget, they're always there to remind me again. And they aren't exactly pretty."
Mike thought back to the day Will had come back after everything, when he'd returned bearing the deep wounds that only showed just how much he'd been through. He had been quite pale after the whole ordeal, but Mike had gotten him back. Even then, not once had Mike ever believed that any part of Will would be anything but beautiful. The very scars he was touching right now that were tied directly to Will's trauma but were never something he should be ashamed of.
Shaking his head, Mike redirected his attention to the more painful part of Will's confession. The one that needed to be addressed because he couldn't cope knowing that Will was directing hate towards himself rather than the very thing that was responsible. "It's not your fault. You..you know that, right? He was using you."
"I mean, can you really blame him?" Will retorted with a small breath, almost as if he'd had the reply ready on his tongue. "I was an easy target, and I was always alone because I'm different and I never felt like I belonged anywhere. No one ever accepted me, I was bullied, and no one trusted me when I came back from the Upside Down. I wasn't going to break; I can handle all of that, but he was always stronger than me. Maybe it was what I deserved." He let out a quiet sigh. "I hated him for it. But I was away from my own thoughts when I was gone, and part of me kind of just..wanted it all to end."
His resignation towards his fate, the way his voice dimmed in sharp, built-up anger before dwindling into melancholy acceptance, pretty much broke Mike's heart entirely.
However, instead of making a comment on it and trying to defuse those words that left a stinging sensation somewhere in the depths of Mike's heart that would likely be brushed away with a harsh eye roll or a shrug, Mike was hit by a realization. "That's why you told us to close the gate," he breathed out as he was struck by the memory of providing Will with the love he'd needed to come back and deliver the message. "You knew it would kill you, but you still told us to anyway."
Will confirmed Mike's speculations. "I couldn't risk letting him hurt you. Any of you. I didn't trust myself. I was—" He paused and took a deep inhale before releasing it. "I was ready, but..I couldn't leave you, Mike."
Mike's heart skipped a beat, fluttering in his chest. There it was. That protective side of Will, the side of him that was sometimes hidden and yet undeniably bold and strong. Fleeting, yet just another reason why Mike adored him. His best friend, his cleric with unbridled loyalty, the person who needed him and wasn't scared to admit it, at least not anymore.
However, Mike once again cut his own thoughts off as yet another realization occurred to him. "You fought for me," he stated softly, and Will tilted his head as he waited for Mike to continue. "Do you remember?"
At this, Will nodded. "Yeah. I knew he'd be pretty pissed at me if I tried to do something he didn't want me to. He didn't let me see past the vines, but I managed to see enough to know how to beat him, and he wasn't happy. When they were trying to get him out, I could hear him talking in my mind, and most of it was just how he didn't want to leave and how much it hurt, but he must have known how much I love you, so he stood no chance." He snorted, though the noise didn't hold any sense of humor. "It was kind of a guess. That he'd get distracted if he realized I was going against him. I didn't know if it would work, and..even though I almost ended up killing myself, I'm glad it worked out."
Mike let out a hum, ghosting his nails over the scars once more as he turned Will's wrist over to reveal them to the light in all of their glory. They wrapped all the way around, were darker in places, and were more prominent in the spots where the rope had dug in where he'd fought against the bonds, so they were mostly prominent on the insides of his wrists. Turning it over with gentle fingers, Mike studied the marks on the other side, finding they were faint and likely hadn't been as deep there, but not any less beautiful to his eyes. "I'm glad, too."
He meant it on the surface that he was glad that Will had been able to escape the suffering and take back his own mind (though clearly, his freedom had already been limited before the whole possession thing happened), however, there was an underlying meaning. One that implied Mike was happy that he'd been allowed to spend so much time at Will's side, in the hospital and during their chaotic shenanigans to decipher Will's drawings.
Will seemed to sense the insinuation as he looked over at Mike, the corners of his lips lifting into a light smile before he reached a hand (the one Mike wasn't obsessing over) to take hold of the mug to drink the last part of the hot chocolate, and Mike once again snorted at the sight of his hot chocolate mustache.
"Stop laughing at me." He lifted a hand to swipe it away, chuckling as he did so and enough to lift Mike's sorrowful spirits. The only thing he'd ever need. "You really like these, then? These scars, even though they're a bit weird and..you know." His fingers twitched as Mike was still stroking the insides of his wrists lightly, nails digging into his palms briefly before he relaxed once more. "I've kinda learned to deal with the sight of them, only because you seem to love them so much."
"Of course I love them." Mike took hold of his other wrist, pulling it towards him so both of Will's wrists were side by side, both bearing similar marks, but one wrist looking worse than the other where he'd broken free before much damage could be done. Side by side, he brushed one thumb over each wrist. "I don't see the same thing you do when I look at them. They're always going to be one of my favorite parts of you, other than your eyes. And I know one day you'll think the same. Perhaps one day, you'll believe me. But until then.."
He didn't finish his sentance, and Will didn't prompt him to.
In front of him, Will yawned, barely audible over the heavy pitter patting of the rain drumming against the roof overhead. Mike felt a similar wave of exhaustion rise up within him, and using his hold on Will's wrist, guided him to his feet so they could move out of the kitchen and back to Will's bedroom.
"Why the hell is the blanket on the floor."
Will had likely intended to sound somewhat disappointed and menacing in his words, however, his voice was quiet and groggy, lacking the intimidating edge he was clearly fighting so hard to convey. Mike scanned the floor for a moment, finding the blanket was indeed sprawled out and had probably happened when he'd dragged his tired self out of the bed on his quest to find Will.
"This is what happens when you decide to up and leave me in the middle of the night," he commented as he moved towards the middle of the room, grabbing the thick blanket that was unsurprisingly soft and moving to throw it back onto the bed where Will has already thrown himself, resulting in burying him underneath it, and of course Mike's first thought was to jump on top of him where he was hidden beneath the blanket.
It was always comfortable to sleep next to him, even though Will was always warm and provided more heat than neccesarry, but Mike would be damned if he slept on the floor or on the couch. It would be too far from him. He always wanted to, no, needed to sleep right by his side.
He eventually managed to wrestle Will out of the burrito blanket he'd rolled himself into, and with that, finally managed to lay his head where Will's heart was beating in his chest, firm and steady against his cheek and not about to stop anytime soon.
Grabbing Will's wrist to place a chaste kiss there before letting their fingers lace together where they lay in the dark, Mike could finally let himself relax.
"Remember when you used to sleep on the floor?"
Mike opened his eyes, craning his head back to see Will peeking down at him through barely opened eyelids. His exhausted demeanor that clung to him took off some of the sass of his usual cheeky grin, making him look lethargic. "No, I don't remember sleeping on the floor because I was too scared to sleep next to you. Like, at all," Mike responded, phrasing it as a bold statement with what had to be way too much firmness adhered to his voice, but, for all intents and purposes, of course he'd been scared to sleep next to Will. After all, he was still in that phase where all he could do was stare at him while he slept, losing sleep just to keep an eye on him and watch the steady rise and fall of his chest like they'd suddenly stop if he wasn't there to check on him.
Will quirked a sassy brow, Mike's answer clearly being an expected one but not desired. "Why are you such a weirdo."
Resisting the urge to scoff, Mike angled his body so they could properly face each other, shifting until his head met the pillow and Will rolled onto his side so they were completely facing each other. "Oh, forgive me, oh love of my life, that you are just so effortlessly pretty that I can't help but want to punch myself in the face."
Will narrowed his eyes, before snorting and rolling his lips inward as Mike popped his lips, and then he rolled onto his other side. Mike chuckled at his nonsensical dramatics, shifting his body into a more comfortable position as he closed his eyes.
"Get over here."
Once more, Mike's eyes flew open, not entirely sure that he had heard Will correctly.
"Um.." Mike began tentatively, hating how meek and frail his voice sounded, nearly drowned out by the downpour of the storm, "..you wanna spoon, or something?"
There was a beat, and in that silent moment of time, Mike almost regretted offering such a thing. But then, Will spoke up without looking back at him, this time emphasizing, "Not in so many words, but yeah."
Mike swallowed thickly. So he had heard him correctly. Not that he bore any doubt, but such an offer seemed too good to be true. Too enticing, and definitely not something he did often enough for it to be a common occurrence.
"Mike."
Will sounded impatient, the bluntness in his groggy tone reaching Mike's ears from where he lay just a few inches away, so close yet so painfully far. Turning the thought over in his mind multiple times, wanting nothing more than to accept but almost fearful for some unknown, muddling reason, Mike gulped. "Are you sure?"
He was stalling, and Will definitely knew it. "Mike, I swear if you don't get over here and spoon with me right now, we're going to have some serious issues and I'm going to do something evil..like, get up and leave or something."
Mike was almost tempted to snort a laugh; however, realizing that Will was dead serious and would absolutely follow through with his threat, Mike nodded.
"Alright, okay," Mike chuckled, and with his limbs feeling too heavy, weighing him down, he reached a hand out with a great deal of effort. Of course, instead of shuffling closer to Will as one might expect, he instead snaked an arm around his waist and dragged him towards the center of the bed until they were pressed close together, inducing a stifled and stuttered breath from Will.
Will glanced over his shoulder at Mike, grinning. "I can't believe you just did that. I didn't mean like..drag me across the whole mattress."
Mike blinked. Well. Duh. Of course. But..he was a menace. Yep. And he was totally not freaking out. Definitely not screaming..on the inside. It only made sense..because he was literally curled around Will's form like it was so normal, and it was! It was so normal, and the contact wasn't at all mind numbing and making him want to scream and cry and perhaps headbutt a wall.
Mike mentally slapped himself. He was being an idiot. A blabbermouth, and he needed to get a grip. Which he did, tightening his arm around Will's stomach.
His hands were slow and deliberate as he purposefully shoved his hands under the shirt Will was wearing, well aware he had ice blocks for hands and only made him chuckle when Will's breath hitched and he flinched away for a second before relaxing once again. Oops. After a few seconds, Will spoke. "At least warn me before you do that." There was a beat before Will continued with a firmer tone, "I'm going to kick you out."
Mike hummed to himself. "Nah, dude. I'd scratch at your door all night, like an extremely upset cat would. That would be annoying. And you'd be cold."
Trying to keep his wandering focus on task, Mike bit at the inside of his cheek as he blindly searched for Will's hands where he couldn't see them, his fingers only meeting empty air before he eventually found Will's thumb, using it as a guide to lace their fingers together. His other arm was already turning numb where Will's head was resting, but did Mike care? No, the answer was he absolutely did not. Sleeping in the same bed as Will was already insane, even though they'd been sleeping in the same bed for a few years by now.
And with that, his thumb brushing over Will's own, Mike relaxed completely against him.
To his surprise, Will didn't say anything. Not liking how silent it had become, almost suffocating under the thick blanket of silence as he settled in, Mike coughed and uttered a meek, "Your hair smells nice."
"Don't get any funny ideas. I just don't want you waking up in a few hours thinking I disappeared again."
"Right, yeah. Totally. That, uh, makes total sense."
Will didn't respond, falling silent in front of him. And now unable to fully relax, Mike remained staring at the back of his head, tightening his hold on Will's hands and encasing them together, fingers drumming against Will's skin in an anxious, drawn-out pattern. One that was erratic, much like the pounding beat of his heart as he breathlessly lay in bed behind Will.
He was so close that he could feel each and every breath Will took, his back expanding against Mike's chest in a gradual rhythm, pressing against him periodically and doing nothing to ease Mike's frantic and wandering thoughts. The mere thought that they were this close and touching, tapping his fingers against Will's hand where they were connected, made his heart beat faster and his fingers begin a more dramatic rhythm.
"Stop it."
Mike's fingers paused, tightening around Will's hand and letting out a breath. Once again, oops. "Sorry, just—" literally dying over here, was what Mike had been about to say, before literally clicking his jaw shut to prevent himself from uttering a single word that would unleash all of his inner thoughts upon Will. Because really, what the hell was going on with him? Why was he being such a muppet? He'd shared a bed with Will countless times. This was nothing new, really; they'd done this before.
And yet, despite his attempts to convince himself that he was completely fine, Mike couldn't help but feel like it was anything but fine.
He thought of Will's nightmare, his vulnerability through their quiet conversation in the middle of the night. About the depths of his possession and his feelings towards the marks he'd been given for all of his struggles, and how he felt about his freedom. He had clearly been holding onto it for quite a while, years actually, considering it had been a few years since those events took place, only choosing to indulge Mike on the anniversary of Bob's death, and therefore the anniversary of his exorcism. And yet, he could have chosen to keep all of that to himself, further leaving him lost to the despair he so often fell victim to.
But no. He had exposed those feelings and his heart to Mike and the reality of what he'd seen during that time. The one that ensnared him and restricted his freedom and kept him imprisoned inside of his own mind.
"Thanks for telling me all of that, Will." The ballad of the rain rolled through the air, sounding like music to Mike's ears and making a new wave of drowsiness wash over him. "That couldn't have been easy to do."
"It was you. I wanted you to know." There was a beat, and Mike longed to glance at Will, to see his face and see how close he was; however, as Will's form once again expanded against him, Mike was quickly reminded of just how close they were. Will's voice was muffled and drawn out, tinted with heavy sleep that indicated that he was on the verge of falling asleep. "You deserved to know."
A few more minutes passed. Will had gone eerily silent, and though that could be contributed to him just falling asleep, Mike had slept in the same bed with him long enough to pick apart each and every one of Will's tells, such as the purposeful even breaths and the stiffness in his limbs where Mike was wrapped almost entirely around him. It was more than obvious that he'd gotten lost in his head somewhere along the journey to falling asleep, and so Mike took it upon himself to drag him out of it.
His arm tightened around Will slightly, dragging him out of his thoughts and away from the memories he'd been suffocating under all night. His shaky hand curled around Mike's own where they were laced together and pressed right against Will's chest, hitching a breath.
"Don't think about it," Mike whispered softly. "You're here with me. In my personal space bubble." He was met with a minute nod. "Think about something else." Will didn't take the time to offer Mike a verbal response, and he didn't expect one from him, so they fell into silence once again as they remained pressed against each other, sharing their warmth like huddling penguins.
"Okay?"
"..mhm."
"Good. Now go to sleep."
Will breathed out a chuckle before purposefully flicking his head back and swatting Mike in the face with a faceful of hair before settling back down once again, clearing his throat. "Yeah, I am."
There was silence, and if anything, the rain intensified against the roof and the window of Will's bedroom. Mike willed his eyes to stay open despite his desire to finally give in to the call of sleep; however, after a few more moments passed, he finally chanced another check on Will, intending to ask him if he was okay if it were not for Will's voice that interrupted him.
"Mike?"
"Mm?"
"Thank you, for..you know."
"You're welcome."
"I mean it, really."
"Will," he grumbled. "Sleep."
Will chuckled softly, offering Mike's hand one last squeeze and pressing further against him, igniting that warmth that was growing between their shared body heats and practically melting where they lay and not allowing even an inch of space between them.
In the muted flashes born from the ongoing storm, he was barely able to see Will in front of him, much less the room around them, and wasn't able to tell if he'd fallen asleep until the rain took a break, allowing Mike the chance to hear the gradual, steady rhythm of his breath, even and deep. Finally, Will had fallen asleep.
Mike listened to him rest for a little longer, mesmerized once more by the peace infused into each and every one of Will's movements, each steady breath he took unlike the harsh deep breaths he'd been taking while they were talking in the kitchen, and the way he was relaxed and no longer gritting his teeth and tensing his jaw with the heavy weight of memories sitting on his shoulders. The longer he stared, studied the factors of Will's rest, the more he realized something. His fleeting fear from the years prior that he would somehow lose Will was just as strong as it had been all that time ago.
Stunned by this revelation, Mike had to refrain from slapping himself, in hopes that it would remind him that Will was right here in his arms and he wasn't going anywhere, not as long as he could help it, knowing that if he did do such a thing and possibly wake Will from his sleep, he'd feel infinitely bad about it and he'd also have to deal with explaining why he was hitting himself. That would also spark up a whole new conversation and put Will in another likely stressful situation that he didn't deserve to be in right now.
Mike sighed; the fear jumbled and wild where they racketed against his skull and threatened to leave him with a headache that he wasn't in the mood to deal with. He was with the person he loved dearly. And so, lulled by the sounds of the rain, Will's breathing, and the warmth created by the tantalizing closeness of their bodies, Mike drifted off to sleep.