Chapter Text
“Hey Astro!” Dandy Perked up. It was an average Saturday afternoon, 2:30 to be exact. “You wanna go out and smoke?” Dandy and Astro were sitting in Dandy’s living room. Dandy still lived with his parents since they were still in senior year of high school.
“See I would” Astro started. “But I finished my last pack yesterday and I have no money”
“Well fuck!” Dandy cursed “I only got one left and I’m planning on using it myself” Dandy rolled his eyes annoyed. “Now what are we supposed to do?”
“We could just stop smoking” Astro stated. “You said we can stop any time”
“You’re right” Dandy stated. That’s when Pebble walked in. “Or we could start a fake charity!” Dandy stated excitedly. “We could use pebble as an example to the cause we are supporting!”
“Isn’t that illegal?”
“Not if you let it be!”
“Okay then…I still have a bad taste in my mouth about this”
“Oh well be fine! We only have a few cops in the town of gardenview, and all of them are horny as a silicon butt plug. We’ll be a-ok”
*Small time skip*
“It’s perfect.” Dandy states holding a very edited photo of pebble looking very beat up and sad. In real life pebble was fine and barking happily.
“Are you sure this will work?” Astro asked still slightly unsure.
“Certainly!” Dandy’s stated. “You’re worrying to much!” They walked outside the apartment building and began looking for a door to knock on.
“I think we should go for one that is 2 or 3 floors up or down” Astro suggested. “That way they won’t know us as well and believe us and not file a complaint to the attorney’s general of charities and fundraisers.”
“Astro you’re a genius!” Dandy congratulated Astro with a pat on the back.
“Hey!~” Shelly called out to them. Jerseys loose on her chest.
“Hey Shelly…” Astro waved at her.
“So what you guys up to this afternoon?”
“We started a fake charity so we can buy cigarettes” Dandy explained.
“Can I help?!” Shelly asked excitedly. “I can attract more people my cuteness!”
“No.” Astro stated. “When you say cuteness you mean flashing people, I trust you. NO BODY WANTS TO SEE YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED PUSSY!”
“Should we go?” Dandy’s asked Astro.
“Yeah” Astro agreed. They both huddled their way to the elevator leaving Shelly standing there. Dandy hit a random button and they went to a random floor. Once they got there they knocked on a random door.
“Coming!” A voice from the room called out rushing to the door. The door opened revealing what seemed to be a Strawberry with tired eyes and long hair that was tied in a ponytail with a white and pink hair tie which perfectly matched with ‘her’ scarf, ‘She’ wore a white shirt and a long dark pink skirt and an apron ontop. “How may I help you?”
“Hi, hello” Dandy started. “We are here to see if you are interested in our charity” Astro handed ‘her’ a flyer they made.
“If you’re wondering the dog is an example of the animals we will save from the street if you give us money!” Astro explained to ‘her’.
“I’m sorry but you boys sound terribly ill!” The ‘lady’ commented. “Come in come in!” ‘She’ gestured them to come in. “I’ll make you two some tea to soothe your throat.”
“Ma’am we’re fine.” Dandy’s stated assured ‘her’.
“No I insist I insist!” ‘She’ held the door open for them to come inside. “Also I’m a Sir not a ma’am, I know it’s confusing, Vee just likes it when I’m feminine and cutesy!”
Astro and Dandy looked at each other before eventually going in. The strawberry lead them to the table in the kitchen and sitting them down.
“What kind of tea do you boys like?” The strawberry asked making his way to one of the cabinets. “I got Apple, Black tea, Green tea, Pomegranate. Many different options.”
“Uhh… Apple sounds good”
“Splendid!” The strawberry started boiling water. “By the way, the name’s Sprout, what about you two”
“I’m Astro and this is Dandy” Astro explained. “And we run the Stars and Dogs charity”
“That’s nice” Sprout poured the hot water into two cups and got two tea bags. “Would you boys like sugar?”
“Yes please” Dandy stated. Sprout brought them the tea.
“Drink up now and then you two go right back home” Sprout demanded.
“What about the charity?”
“Oh that! Well I don’t have any money now. Vee is the one with the money! I’ll ask her about it when she gets home and you two come back tomorrow, I’ll make sure to make you more tea if you two are still sick and I’ll tell you if Vee said yes or no”
Dandy and Astro nodded and then drank the tea.
“Thank you for the tea ma- I mean sir” Dandy thanked before leaving the house.
“I’m having a bad feeling about this” Astro stated. “That lad- I mean man was so nice. Weird but nice. I just feel bad about scamming people like him.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Dandy stated. “Come on! Let’s go to the next door!”
“Alright…”