Chapter Text
“Phil?” Dan said, sounding afraid of his own voice. He almost wished that he hadn't spoken now.
“Yeah Dan, is everything okay?” Phil questioned, worried by the tone in Dan’s voice.
“Well I… never mind, it's nothing important,” Dan answered, kicking himself now for setting their conversion off on this damn path. Now he could only hope that Phil would let it drop and they could get back to editing. No such luck.
“I'm sure it is Dan, now please tell me what's going on. You know the old saying, a problem shared…”
“Is a problem halved,” Dan sighed. “I know.” However, he was still too terrified to voice his thoughts to the raven haired boy beside him. Phil saw this and grabbed Dan's chin gently, guiding him to meet their eyes, chocolate brown orbs meeting limpid blue ones. It was in moments like these that Dan saw the little flecks of green and yellow, giving his friend's eyes a magical and almost iridescent quality.
Phil, meanwhile, was noticing for the first time the true depth in Dan’s eyes. The seemingly plain brown eyes were marbled with hints of caramel and gold, making his gaze soft and inviting,magical and Phil found himself getting lost in those eyes.
Dan, noticing Phil lose focus, happily welcomed the pause to consider whether he should simply tell Phil what was bothering him. Maybe he would just forget anything was wrong? ‘Oh who are you kidding?’ Dan chided himself internally. ‘This is Phil for fucks sake! He's not going to let it rest until he knows you're okay, and you know it.’ Dan shook his head slightly at his own stupidity, snapping Phil back to reality.
“Dan,” Phil said softly, taking the brunet’s hands in his own, “please tell me what's on your mind. I hate seeing you conflicted like this, and if I can help then I will. You're my best friend Dan.” Phil finished this mini-speech with a small, comforting smile.
Dan took a deep breath. This was it, he would finally get his answers. The question now, would they be the answers he was hoping for?
“Did you really mean it?” Dan asked quickly, too quickly.
“What?” Phil asked, puzzled by whether he heard Dan right or not, and if so, what what he could be referring to.
“Did you really mean what you said before?” Dan repeated, more coherently this time. Seeing Phil’s blank expression, Dan elaborated further.
“Before, when you said you couldn't live without me. Did you mean that?”
“Of course I did,” Phil said jovially. “There was no way I could have defeated that boss by myself!”
Any hope that had been brought to Dan by the beginning of Phil’s response was shattered as he continued. Still, Dan pressed on, desperate to get a real answer.
“No, I mean, me. Not my character, and not in the game. Me.” Dan's voice got quieter and quieter throughout this, the last words barely a whisper. He couldn't read Phil’s expression, which made him worry that whatever Phil said next would hurt Dan immensely.
But he hadn't even speculated what happened next.
Without another word, Phil got up from his seat and left the room. Before Dan had a chance to process what had happened, he heard the distinct sound of a bolt being slid into place.
Not knowing what else to do, Dan saved the progress they had made on the video and went for a shower before heading to bed. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep tonight, but hoped that perhaps the music on his phone could provide temporary sanctuary from the turmoil in his mind.
How could could he have been so stupid? He ruined a perfect friendship with Phil, who clearly didn't care for Dan as much as the brown haired boy had hoped, and this new revelation hurt him deeply.
Finding no solitude in the music, he pulled out his headphones and opened up his laptop to lose himself in the depths of the Internet. He found himself on Tumblr in an instant, scrolling aimlessly through his timeline, barely focusing on the screen in front of him.
When the timid knock sounded at his door, he didn't when notice. He was too wrapped up in his own thoughts to hear. However, when the door slowly creaked open, the light turning on brought Dan's attention to the tall figure standing in his doorway.
Phil’s eyes were bloodshot, as if he'd been crying, but Dan couldn't imagine why. Surely, if anyone should be broken by their earlier conversation, it should be Dan, right?
Wordlessly, Phil came over and sat opposite Dan on his bed, sitting cross-legged much like the younger boy always did. Dan's breath hitched in anticipation, almost too afraid to hear what Phil had to say. Maybe he'd ask Dan to move out? No, surely not. He wouldn't end a six year friendship over something so stupid, would he?
However, before Dan had a chance to voice his thoughts, or ask his questions, Phil began to explain his behaviour from earlier that evening.
“Dan, please don't say anything, just hear me out okay? I don't know how to say this, but I'm going to try anyway.”
Phil paused for for a moment, hesitant to continue. These next few moments would change everything, and he couldn't bear to screw it up.
Dan started to worry. What could be so bad that Phil couldn't tell him? There wasn't much doubt as to what he was about to be told, so he decided to speak up.
“Phil, it's fine. I get it. I'll have my stuff packed by the end of the week, and I'll be out of your life. It's okay, I understand, really.”
Phil just looked shell shocked, and Dan assumed it was because Phil hadn't thought he would work it out.
“Dan,” said Phil, sounding stricken, “why would you move out?”
Dan looked at Phil in confusion, lost for for a response. Phil shouldn't be reacting like this. He was about to ask Dan to move out, wasn't he?
“Because I've really screwed up now, and I can't take back what I said or how I feel, and now I've scared you away. I've lost you,” Dan said, emotion cracking his voice.
“Dan, you haven't lost me. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere, and neither are you,” Phil stated matter-of-factly. “When is said I couldn't live without you, I meant it completely. You are the best thing in my life, and I can't see a moment without you there. I didn't want to say anything, because I was scared that it would have you running away like a bullet, so I walked out. If I had stayed any longer, I would have broken down, and I couldn't bear for you to see that, so I left. I'm sorry if I worried you. I'll go back to my room now. Goodnight Dan.” Then, with a weak smile, Phil stood up and moved for the door.
“Phil, wait.” Dan implored, causing the blue eyed boy to stop dead in his tracks.
Dan stood up so that he wasn't looking up at Phil, but didn't move any closer either.
“Phil, I don't want to make you think that you can't tell me something. If you have something to say, say it. Best friends don't keep secrets from each other.”
“Yeah, we're best friends, and that's all we'll ever be,” Phil said, his voice dropping towards the end in the hopes that Dan hadn't heard his Freudian Slip. But he did.
“Do you see us as more than that?” Dan asked, taking a hesitant step forwards, barely breathing.
“No, well I mean, what I said I-- “
Phil’s rambling was suddenly cut off when a pair of soft lips met his own. In disbelief that this could actually be happening, Phil didn't kiss back. Realising this, Dan pulled away, looking at the floor in embarrassment.
“I'm sorry, I just thought...well I was…”
“Dan,” Phil said, cutting the younger boy off, “can I… can I kiss you?”
“Please.”
Phil leaned forward slowly, and caught Dan's lips with his own. Dan's hands settled on Phil’s waist, pulling the older boy ever closer. One of Phil’s arms snaked around Dan's neck, the other carding through his hair before settling cupping Dan's face ever so gently.
After a time had passed (neither boy could have said how long) they finally broke apart, slightly panting for the air that the kiss and robbed them of. Phil was the first to speak again.
“Well that was…”
“Yeah.”
“Uh, Dan?”
“What's up?”
“Well you know how you said I shouldn't keep things from you?” Phil was terrified at the prospect of what he was about to say, but if he didn't say it now he might never.
“Yeah…” Dan prompted, looking puzzled.
“Well, there's something I've been keeping from you for a long time, and I think now is the best time to say it.” Phil paused, gathering his courage.
“Since the moment we first met, I knew there could never be anyone else for me but you. You were my laughter, my sunshine. Picked me up when I was down, and made my best days better. And, well, I guess what I'm trying to say is, I love you bear. I always have, and I always will.”
Dan laughed at this.
“Phil you could not have been more cheesy! I love you too you spork, now and forever.”
Just then, Phil noticed the time on Dan's clock. 3:57 am.
“Um, Dan, it's really late… or early… you know what I mean. I should probably go to my room and get some sleep.”
“Or, you could stay in here? If you want to.”
“I'd want nothing more.” said Phil, breathing a quiet sigh of relief, a content smile gracing his features.
The boys lay together, Phil’s arm around Dan's waist, Dan nuzzling against his… his… what were they exactly?
“Phil?”
“Yeah?”
“Would you like to be my boyfriend?”
And then Phil’s heart did that flippy-over thing.
“More than anything.”
And with a final kiss goodnight, the two friends drifted off to sleep. Because, despite the new label, they were best friends first.
Now they just happened to be boyfriends too.
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Two years later
“Phil!” Dan yelled across the apartment, “have you seen my straighteners?”
“You left them in the bathroom you goof.” Phil laughed, watching his boyfriend panic to get rid of his ‘hobbit hair’. “I don't see why you don't just keep the curls though, you look so cute with them,” Phil said, kissing Dan on the cheek, before going to the kitchen to check if he had everything for tonight.
The boys were meeting with their families later that evening in a restaurant, celebrating their two year anniversary.
Or rather, that's what Dan thought was happening.
Phil pulled the velvet box out of his pocket once more, checking that the ring was still there and undamaged. He had found a silver engagement band, and had the inscription ‘I love you bear’ engraved on the inside.
Phil shut the box with a satisfied snap. This was going to be the best day ever.