Chapter Text
A duck walked up to a lemonqde stamd and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?"
(Duh duh duh)
The man said, "no u dum bitch we selk fkin lemanade look at da fakin sign l-e-m-o-n-a-d-e do da look liek grapes to ya" and the duck cried im sorry im a duck i camt read y must u humams sbuse me so n the man pulled out a knife n ws like im gnna eat ya but then silco came out if the shadows n ws like no thts my daughtrs duck u no tounch n the man ws like i so sirry idk he ws one o urs n silco ws like dieee n but the n suprman flwe down n saved the guy n ws like luthor ths has to stap bc lex luthur n silco r rlly the same persom n ths is lex luthor now n wen he said daughter he meang conner who had transitioned into a gurl n lex said but he threatjened our daughters duck n sups ws like dat don men u kill im n then batman appeared n killed luthor n the guy n duck ran away. Superman was horrified, he could feel cold sweat on hs bac as he looked at his best fried, tjis man who hed fought beside so mane times n always trustd 2 hav his bac in abject horror. How could he do this?? This wasnt the bruce y/n knew at all. "B-b-b-b-bruce" y/n stuttered, as suprmans secret identity was y/n all along, "h-h-h-h-how c-could you d-d-do this????" y/n stuttered. Batman aka billionare playboy gemtly cuped y/n's face "because my wittly pokkie wookie beawy weawy, i cant stand it wen othr mean try n get close to ma mans." 'N-n-n-no way ----' y/n's eyes widened in shock. Batman aka billionare playboy Brucie Wayne was a yandere⁉️⁉️
Before y/n cld react a soft "i like trains" was heard in the distance and suddenly thomas the tank engiene came batreling thru n killed batman aka billionare blayboy bruce wayne. "Dw bbg i gotchu" u cld hear thomas say. N then frm inside the conductors placw in da train the real batman aka billionare playboy bruce wayne appeared. "Superman, do not worry that was just an illusion made using dark magic. I suspect it was created by the cat mage known as Francais to undermine me" superman aka y/n let out a sigh of relief, it seemed his bestfiend hadnt beyrayed him or his own moral code. But there was one more thing tht needed explaining
"Batman" superman aka y/n tentatively started, "how did u get the ellusive thomas tbe tank engine to help u????" Batman aka billionare playboy bruce wayne seemed to shrink slightly at the question, the corners of his mouth pulling down into a deeper scowl thsn the one alr on his face. "So you see, my secret identity is gothamie billionare playboy bruce wayne. I lost my parents thomas and martha wayne at a younge age. Howevr my father, thomas was turned into a living train by a mad scientist to feature in childrens tv. His new name is thomas the tank engienne. Unfortunately, many of his memories were lost, fragmented, and he does not complwtely wemembw me"
Thimas seemed to sadden at this, weather it was over his missing memories or the guilt of abandining his son wen he died n not rebemwring, y/n did not know. Superman aka y/n gently held batman aka billionare playboy bruce wayne's hand and said "at least hes here now" At ths batman aka billionare playboy bruce wayne's lips quirked up and his mood seemed to shift. Y/n's eyes flitted to his lips and they both leaned in. "Jeez if you're gonna do that then get a room don't do it out on the streets" a rugge, sexy voice called from above. It was the Red Hood (aka Jason Todd aka my husband), perched on the roof of a building. His form was backlighted by the moon, shodows obsured his visage giving him an imposing yet tantilisingly mysterious aura. Bats and y/n looked away shyly. They knwe jay wld make an appearance ebentually, he was the author's fav afterall, but this was unexpected amd embarassing. Jasom sighed hotly and jumped down from the building with a flip amd landing perfectly om his sick ass motorcycle and sustaining no damage becayse he was just so cool. He rode off into the distance, looking as hot as ever in the moonlight.
Notes:
Oki guyz hope u liked the last chap update. We finally got to see Red Hood‼️‼️ The author is tired now and taking a break but u can expect anotjer update the next time i wake past midnight.
Chapter 2: Rawr XD
Summary:
Spoiler, Francais is being framed by evil doggos, i never got that far into actually writing it tho.
Notes:
Alr pookies author iz still awake so another chapter is cumming‼️‼️
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Now thst the most important character has left batman aka billionare playboy bruce wayne and superman aka y/n both boarded thomas the tank engiene and set out to gatjer a tean to defeat the cat mage francais. For this mission they would need sum1 skilled in the mystic arts, and who bettr to call upon than a fairy?? Their eneme was also a cat. So their first member would be roxy, the animal fairy and kind of member of the winx club. Next, they would need
someone experienced in tracking and capturing (killing) targets. Someone who has links to the dark underside of society n can giv them info on dis evil mage. Fir this they chose speed-o'-sound sonic. And lastly, im not evn gonna try n come up w an excuse to include thiz one, deadpoopl
Sugar, spice, everything nice, and 2 mercs/asassins kinda, the perfect hero team for cat hunting was formed
In the room evry1 gathered except sonic bc author realised she cldnt write him. Batman aka billionare playboy bruce wayne began, "according to the the info we got frm sonic n gatjered independantly" tbe evil cat mage francais is hiding in a guild of other cats who call themselves the 'castle cats'. As far as his comrades know he is just their fellow guildmate, they have no knowledge of his crimes. Try and avoid being spotted by them, lest innocent cats be caught in the crossfire"
Notes:
Ok lovlies, thats really it for now, author's phone is dieing and author has to sleep‼️‼️ Will update the fic later, until then, kys ;3
V1B3z on Chapter 1 Wed 13 Aug 2025 05:17AM UTC
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Rosss_51 on Chapter 1 Wed 13 Aug 2025 05:26AM UTC
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