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When Dean pulled on the driveway of their small house, he saw Castiel opening the door with a smile on his face.
Dean smiled, it was nice to see him smiling, something he hadn’t done much of recently due to being bogged down with work.
“Hey,” Dean greeted, kissing Cas on the cheek as he slipped past him to put his jacket over the banister. Cas pulled him back in by the belt loops in Dean’s jeans, meshing their lips together. “Someone’s happy,”
Dean felt Cas smile into the kiss before pulling back and pressing their foreheads together and wrapping his arms around Cas’ lower back, teasing at where his shirt was tucked in.
“I’m definitely feeling better, we managed to get on top of all the workload.” Cas explained in a whisper as if he didn’t want anyone else to hear.
“That’s great Cas,” Dean said, his eyes flickered over to the dining room table, which he saw was set for two, table cloth, wine glasses and a candle in the centre. Dean frowned in confusion, they never had wine with dinner, and Dean was pretty sure they didn’t own that candle stand. “Having a fancy dinner tonight?” Dean wondered.
“Something like that,” Cas said, eyes crinkling and making Dean suspicious. He didn’t have a clue what he was up to. If he wanted something, all he had to do was ask.
Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean, holding him close and rested his chin atop Dean’s shoulder. This was nice, especially after so long of not really seeing each other, both working late on different nights and missing out on each other. They’d barely been able to sit down for a meal together and had mostly left a spare plate on the side for the other whenever they got home.
“Dean?” Cas said gently, Dean could feel the fine hairs on the side of his neck stand up as Cas’ breath brushed against them. Dean hummed a reply, shutting his eyes and swaying his hips as if there were music playing. He missed this. Just being able to stand there and be. Being able to just hold his boyfriend without anyone else there to talk to them or get in their way or give them sly looks.
“Marry me?” It was no more than a whisper and Dean wasn’t even sure that he’d heard right. Dean moved so that he was face to face with Cas.
“You asked – what?”
“Marry me, Dean.” Castiel repeated with a chuckle, smile wide and expectant.
The wine glasses, the candle and the fancy place settings all made sense. A proposal. Dean was not prepared. He couldn’t. He wanted to. Not right then though. Thought upon thought crashed like waves against cliff faces in his mind and he stepped out of Cas’ embrace. Heart stuttering, words unable to be formed, Dean stepped back further.
Cas’ face falling was in slow motion as he headed back out the door and into the cool night.
Cas had just proposed to him.
Proposed.
Just like that.
Dean barely thought anything else as he put one foot in front of the other and walked mindlessly down the street. He heard Cas shout his name, felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He didn’t answer and kept on walking.
*
The bar was busy so he tucked himself on the bar stool furthest away, leaning against the wall. A headache was starting to form from how tense he’d been on the way over.
Marry me? Bounced around his mind like a ping pong ball and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Guilt warped his stomach, how could he have just left after that.
“Nice to see you, Dean.” A voice said. Dean looked up to see Ellen stood there, plain brown shirt over a white vest top, looking every bit intimidating as she usually did.
“Hey,” Dean grumbled, interlinking his fingers and staring at them as if they’d solve all his issues.
“Boy, you look like you had a fight with a train.” She said, none too sensitively.
“Feels like it. Can I have a whiskey please?” Ellen muttered an affirmative before disappearing.
It wasn’t long before she was back, pushing the glass tumbler towards his hands. Wordlessly, Dean brought the glass to his lips and downed it in one. He just didn’t want to feel anything right now, neither the guilt nor the overwhelming words fluttering around his head.
Dean’s phone buzzed constantly in his pocket and he finally took it out, dropping it on the counter and staring at the screen that was announcing that Cas was calling, the all smiles still of him stabbing more guilt into him.
“I’m gonna need at least six more of these.” Dean said to another barman who nodded and poured him two, which he down quickly, followed by another two, which were gone in seconds. By the fifth and sixth one, Ellen had come over, eyeing Dean with suspicion.
“Where’s that boy o’ yours?” She wondered. Ever since they’d been together, Ellen rarely saw Dean in the bar with the sole purpose to get drunk and go home to not remember anything.
Dean shrugged noncommittedly. Raising his fifth whiskey with a fumble and lopsided grin.
“Dean Winchester, you take one more of those whiskeys and there’ll be hell to pay. Ya hear?” Ellen told him sternly. Dean moved towards the glass anyway. All he wanted was to rid of Castiel’s voice.
Marry me?
Marry me, Dean.
Nope. He wasn’t dealing with it. A hand over his own stopped him from downing his last one.
“Dean, honey?” Ellen’s voice had softened considerably. Dean clenched his jaw, eyes stinging and throat threatening to close up.
“He asked me to marry him,” Dean choked. He pulled a stirrer from the box to his left and absentmindedly stirred his drink, watching as the ice cubes began to melt.
“And you?” She prompted, trying to get the whole story out of him.
“Ran off. Came here. Got drunk.” Dean grumbled, he sniffed, there was no way he was shedding tears.
“Dean,” Voice stern, Dean looked up, eyes watery. “You best go home to that boy o’ yours and sort it out.”
“Can’t I stay here tonight?” He pleaded. He wasn’t sure if he was even up for going back home. Who knew what sort of shit storm there’d be when he got there. He’d walked out on Cas, after he’d proposed. Who did that?
Dean’s phone buzzed again. Ellen reached over before Dean could react and answered it.
“Yeah, he’s here… He’s been drinking, yeah… okay… yeah, I’m sorry, Castiel… of course honey, I’ll set him straight… sure, I’ll put him on.” Dean watched, dumbfounded as the conversation played out in front of him before noticing the phone had been thrust towards him, and followed by an intimidating look. That was definitely Ellen’s ‘do it before I kill you look’ and there was no way he was rebelling, it didn’t matter how much he wanted to.
“Cas?” Dean’s voice was on the edge of breaking.
“Dean, I’m sorry okay. I shouldn’t have sprung that on you.” Cas was sorry? Why was he sorry, Dean was the one who had walked out, he was the one who’d messed it all up and spoilt what should have been the best day of his life.
“Don’t, Cas. Don’t tell me you’re sorry, I’m sorry. I am. God, I’m so sorry, Cas-” The phone was taken off him before he could grovel anymore, and Ellen was telling Cas that Dean would be home soon.
Ellen took the towel from her shoulder and stashed it behind the bar before talking to one of her employees.
Hands clasped around Dean’s arm and he was hauled to his feet.
“I’m gonna take you home, and you’re gonna apologise to Cas and make it right. He loves you, Dean. I know you feel the same too, just a couple of months ago you were in here buzzing about him.”
“He asked me to marry him,” Dean repeated.
“Yeah, he sure did, boy. You must be real special to him, I know you are. Here,” She handed him a pint of water. “Drink it slowly, I ain’t having you throwing up in my truck.” Dean nodded and took the glass, taking sips as he followed her to a booth in the corner.
The water was cold and Dean could feel every sip slip into his system. It was refreshing and surprisingly sobering.
“Alright, let’s go.”
Windows open and blasting Dean with the cold air, Ellen drove Dean the short distance back to his and Cas’ small house.
*
Cas opened the door as soon as Ellen’s truck arrived on the road. Dean turned to look at her.
“What if I’ve messed this up for good?” He mused.
“You haven’t, he’s waiting for you Dean, and he loves you. Now go in and sort it out.”
There was no denying Ellen’s orders so Dean opened the door and walked up the path to the front door where Cas was leaning against the door jamb with a tired face.
Just as he stepped up to the porch, Cas’ arms were around him, pulling him in tightly, one arm cupping the back of his neck and soothing through the short hairs.
“Of course I’ll marry you, Cas.” Dean breathed into Cas’ shoulder.
Cas huffed laugh, though Dean couldn’t work out what was even remotely funny about the situation, but he found himself laughing as well.
Dean pressed his lips against Cas’, cool in the night air and waddled them into the house, shutting the door behind them.
“Of course I’ll marry you…” Dean repeated. “I love you, Cas.”
“I love you too, Dean.” Cas replied, looking up at Dean with his soft, forgiving expression.