Chapter Text
It was August 31, 1989 - one day before classes started at Hogwarts. I stood in the King’s Cross train station, twirling my hair around my finger nervously as I watched magical families milling about on the platform. The white streak contrasting harshly with the dark brown as it twists around my index finger. Pulling me out of my thoughts, the train blows its whistle as it pulls into the station. I struggle to make my way to the doors with my baggage, alone. Unfortunately, I’m one of the last students to get on the train, leaving very few seats left for me to choose from.
As I walk down the aisle, past already full and chattering compartments, I see Calypsa waving at me. “Hey! Come sit with us!” I smile warmly to my friend, making my way over to her. My smile falters for a fraction of a second when I see him - Jared - sitting there smiling at me. We had split up at the end of last year. He hadn’t taken it well, yelling and screaming at me in the gardens, calling me names that hurt to even repeat in my head. Now, he smiled at me like nothing had happened, but the warmth didn’t reach his eyes. His eyes were cold, calculating.
I tried to return the smile, but it came out tight-lipped and unnatural. I take a seat next to my friend, who is already chattering away about her plans for the year - something about a boy named Theo and the Yule Ball. I’m always glad to let her ramble on - she knows I won’t absorb everything, and it allows me to retreat into my head for a moment. I try to compose myself - not wanting Jared to know that his presence rattled me. I retreat to my mind, imagining myself floating - free of any worldly restraints or worries - in the sky as a bird might when the wind hits just right and it hovers for a moment.
After a moment, I am lurched out of my internal oasis as the train lurches forward. Luckily, I hear Calypsa ask about my schedule. I dig in my bag, producing a scrawled-out schedule for my first semester in my spidery script:
7:30 AM - Breakfast
9:00 AM - Charms - Professor Filius Flitwick
10:00 AM - Divination - Professor Sybill Trelawney
11:00 AM - Herbology - Professor Pomona Sprout
12:15 PM - Lunch
1:15 PM - Transfiguration - Professor Minerva McGonagall
2:30 PM - Potions - Professor Severus Snape
3:30 PM - Free Period
6:00 PM - Dinner
11:00 PM - Curfew
I wince slightly as Calypsa squeals in delight. “You have Divination with me and Potions with Jared! Then we can all meet up at the end of the day in our free period! Yay! I’m so glad we are all going to be able to be together again this year!”
I stop listening fully when she mentions I’m sharing Potions with Jared. My body stiffens, and my mind reels. Potions has a lot of partner work. What if I’m forced to work with him? What if I can’t focus because of him? What if Professor Snape gives us both detention, and I’m stuck in the same room as him after dinner? My mind won’t stop racing and then it all suddenly crashes to a halt as Jared puts his hand on my thigh. My body freezes, eyes locked onto his hand. What the fuck is happening?
“It’ll be good to have the gang all back together, right, Rorie?” Jared looks down his nose at me, using the nickname he knew I loathed. I can see straight through his niceties, but I can’t pinpoint what he is planning. I respond without words, giving him another tight-lipped smile. Right then, there was a harsh rapping at the compartment window - Professor McGonagall was doing a walk-through of the train to make sure all was well. It wasn’t. She slides the door open, and a disapproving eye glances at Jared's hand, still on my thigh.
“Mr. Carrow. I do not wish to deduct points from Slytherin before the year has officially started. I do hope you will respectably conduct yourself while onboard this train and for the rest of the year,” she states with a critical tone to her Scottish accent.
Jared pulls his hand away from me - thank Merlin. “Sorry, Professor. I was just trying to reassure Aurora that this year will be great,” he flashes his best smile at her, playing the star student he has always been.
Professor McGonagall purses her lips at him but gives a short nod. “So be it, but stay out of trouble, Mr. Carrow,” she says curtly - I don’t think she bought his act this time around.
Jared and I let out a relieved sigh as she walks away. I glance at him, annoyed, through the corner of my eye. What are you doing? I can’t help but feel that he is playing nice to get me to put my guard down around him.
Finally, the train comes to a halt, and we are signalled to depart with our belongings. We have to transfer to carriages pulled by some invisible force. If only I could come up with some excuse to get away from this rake of a man.
As if answering my prayers, Professor Trelawney calls my name, waving as I step off the train. I flash a warm smile at one of my favorite professors before making my way over to her with my luggage.
“Good morning, dear! I hope you are well!” the bespectacled teacher beams at me. I welcome her distraction from my carriage companions happily.
“Yes, good morning! I will say I am a bit nervous, but I am so glad to see you!” As I reply, I see Professor Snape looming a few feet behind her, watching with quite the sour face. I lean in to whisper to Professor Trelawney, “What has gotten into Professor Snape? He seems more dour than usual.”
The clairvoyant teacher tries to hide her chuckle behind her hand, making quite the snort. “Oh, the dungeon bat is just upset he has to share a carriage with me. You know he hates when I try to read his fortune,” She pauses for a moment, before having quite the self-entertaining idea. “Oh, I know! Perhaps you should join us, so I can read yours instead! There is plenty of room for a little thing like you!”
I nervously chuckle, noticing that the “dungeon bat” had obviously heard Trelawney’s proposal - not agreeing with it in the slightest. “Oh, I don’t know Professor…” I trail off as she is already leading me toward the carriage they have.
I feel two sets of eyes boring into me as I walk to the teachers’ carriage - both from brooding Slytherin men. Jared glares at me as if I were prey that had escaped him, and Professor Snape looks at me with his typical brooding “I hate students” look. Trelawney helps me load my luggage next to hers before insisting I sit across from her so she can read my palms better. This leaves Professor Snape to choose between sitting next to the ever-chattering clairvoyant and his student. I cannot decide which would be better, but he sits next to me before I can even pray he doesn’t. He keeps as far from me as possible in the small space, black looming form pushed as far against the wall as possible. I similarly scoot towards the wall, not out of fear but out of respect for his choice to put space between us.
As Trelawney polishes the lenses of her thick glasses, I can’t help but realize I’ve never been truly scared of the potions professor like most students. I respect his authority as our teacher, and he can certainly be stern, but he is a fair teacher for the most part. Though, I wouldn’t want to be causing any mischief if he woke up on the wrong side of the bed - he tends to take his aggravation out on every person in a 10 mile radius.
Professor Trelawney finally asks me for my hand, and I happily comply. I find her predictions are not always the most accurate, but they certainly are always entertaining at the least.
She hums to herself softly, tracing the lines of my left palm before speaking. “You have an interesting Head Line….it starts out quite shallow before getting deeper as it reaches towards the end of your Life Line. But your Life Line is strong and unbroken! And your Heart Line….it is deep…but it is split…overlapping in places…Oh, but your Mount of Jupiter is small, underdeveloped…we must work on that, my dear. Mm but your Mounts of Apollo, Mercury, and Venus are quite prominent!” As she rattles on, I find myself unable to follow.
“Professor…I’m a bit lost..could you explain?” I ask softly, not wanting to disturb the brooding potions teacher next to me.
Trelawney gasps loudly, not changing her volume at all despite Professor Snape - he scowls deeply. “Merlin, I am sorry! I tend to chatter on sometimes! Your head line shows you will become more focused and goal-oriented as you get older,” she traces the lines on my palm as she explains each one. “And your life line shows you will have a long healthy life - not without its challenges though, dear.” she furrows her brow, touching my heart line before quickly moving on. “I will consult the cards on this one in a moment…but your Mount of Jupiter…dear…you must be more confident with yourself…you are a smart, beautiful young lady,” Professor Snape huffs, annoyed beside me. Trelawney shoots him an unseen glare before continuing. “Your Mount of Apollo shows you are quite creative and artistic..this one…Mount of Mercury shows you are quite intelligent and a good communicator.” She looks up at me mischievously through her thick lenses, “and the Mount of Venus is strong….you will have quite the developed love life my dear.” She snickers softly to herself, releasing my hand to pull her tarot cards from her satchel. I blush softly at her last prediction, not knowing exactly what she meant by that. Trelawney shuffles her cards, muttering to herself, eyes closed. I can’t help but wonder how much of this is accurate…. should I truly believe any of it or just act like this is a fun game?
As if answering me, Professor Snape scoffs to himself. I furrow my brows together. That was timed too well to be a coincidence….but legilimency is not allowed at Hogwarts…at least for the students. Again, as if he heard my thoughts, he glanced at me through the corner of his eyes before quickly looking away. Gotcha. He seems to brood even more if such a thing is even possible.
Trelawney produces her cards just as the carriage comes to a stop, “The Devil reversed… and the Two of Cups!” she exclaims just as she climbs out of the carriage. I furrow my brows, not knowing at all what those mean, but The Devil certainly doesn’t sound like something I would want associated with my Heart Line.
*_*_*
I sit at the Slytherin table in the Great Hall, watching the new first years get sorted into their houses, which was always one of the more boring parts of the new school year in my opinion. I can’t help but daydream, trying to think of anything besides school. I find myself retreating to that place in my mind, floating in my imagined sky once again. I let all of my pent-up nervousness fall away, finally unclenching my jaw and relaxing my shoulders. Someone clears their throat quietly in my direction, pulling me out of my thoughts. I realize I am accidentally looking at Professor Snape with what I’m sure was quite the dreamy expression. I school my features quickly before looking over to the group of first years anxiously being sorted.
Finally, all of the students are sorted, and the feast begins. The table is magically set - met with laughter and cheers from the newest students - and we all start loading our plates. I pick slowly at my food, too lost in thought to truly want to eat anything.
I quietly excuse myself from the Great Hall before dinner is over to go watch the sunset over the garden. I slip outside and sit on one of the stone benches, once again lost in thought. The day had already been quite taxing between Jared’s seemingly false kindness and Professor Trelawney’s uncertain prediction. My brain was tired, and I longed for the peace of the gardens. I sit watching as the sun sank deeper into hues of red and pink, my mind fully stilling for the first time that day. I felt as if the colors consumed me - as if I were floating weightlessly amongst the vibrant clouds.
I’m not sure how long I had sat in the gardens, but it was completely dark by the time I came back to reality. A moment of panic shocks through me as I spot a tall figure standing by the nearest castle entrance. Not knowing how late it was, I scurry towards the doors, not wanting to be caught after curfew by a professor. As I near, I can make out the features of the person. Pale skin, hooked nose, seemingly permanent scowl - Professor Snape. Fuck! Curfew!
“Curfew is in 10 minutes, Miss Thistlewood. It would be a shame to earn detention before classes start for the year.” I can hear the smirk in his voice as I rush past him and into the castle. Thankfully, the Slytherin dorms are not far from this hall - if I run, I may make it.
“I will remind you there is no running in the halls, young lady.” His sneer sounds from behind me just before I round a corner. Why is he mocking me? I slow to a brisk walk reluctantly. I can feel him following behind me, his longer stride easily keeping up with me as I speed walk. I round another corner into the stairwell to the dungeons, slipping into the Slytherin common room just as the clock chimes quietly to signal 11:00 PM. I let out a breath I didn’t know that I was holding as I collapse into the nearest chair. My heart still beats fast, and I can feel my cheeks are a bit warm. I can’t help but wonder why I felt like prey that had just escaped a predator.