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It wasn’t often that an island was blessed like this, for the Red Haired Pirates to linger as long as they were doing. You wondered why that was, of course you did, but another part of you didn’t want to know. You just took it in stride, eagerly, just glad for them to be around. Well, glad may be a strong word to use, but you were certainly glad about the presence of one First Mate Benn Beckman. He was most certainly one of them, a drunkard and rowdy when he wanted to be, laughing and joking with the best of them, but he was also the eldest of the bunch and often a bit of a mother hen. It endeared you to him quickly, as an employee at the tavern they’d been frequenting, and often left you and him as the last people in the place of an evening, as he hauled the last crew member to his feet and out of the door.
The two of you had sat together once everyone else was sent away, the bar and tables wiped clean, and the door locked to prevent anyone else from stumbling in more than once. Quite often after the first time, really. He was a strong conversationalist when he wasn’t surrounded by his crew and drinking, and you found it easy to talk to him. Beckman was a little flirtatious sometimes, but you found that unlike some of his crew mates, it didn’t make you roll your eyes or grimace. Generally he had better lines, which did help, but it also just felt better coming from him. He was handsome, well spoken and considerate - you’d be insane not to enjoy it, really. At least, that was your defence.
Steadily it was growing closer to them leaving, after all they couldn’t remain here forever, eventually they needed to move on, check on their various territories, or just keep on the move from marines. You knew it, and yet you chose to ignore it, because if nobody had said anything to you then you were able to pretend you couldn’t feel it in the air. Feel that they were slowly starting preparations to head back out to sea. It wasn’t real if nobody said it out loud, and so you refused to do so. Benn had also said nothing, so it couldn’t be all that soon.
You sighed and rolled your eyes as Shanks approached you in the market, not at all subtle as he stepped in beside you but said nothing, only inspecting the fruit in the stall far too intently to be anything real. Like he thought if he stared hard enough it’d catch fire. But he said nothing, so neither did you. He underestimated your ability to entirely ignore someone, out of spite alone if nothing else. Clearly, this wasn’t what he’d been expecting to happen, as when you finished getting what you wanted and paid the merchant, you moved onto another stall, and Shanks only stood and stared, stunned, as you walked away. It was several minutes later that he caught up to you again, stepping in beside you.
“You don’t want to know what I was going to say?” He asked lamely.
“I am curious, but if you have something to say then you can say it. I’m not going to tease it out of you.” You replied, picking up a carrot to inspect with furrowed brows.
“Well, since you asked so nicely,” he said, which only served to make you sigh, “we’re having a little get together on the beach for lunch and I think you should come along.” You turned to look at him properly, a single brow raised. You didn’t need to say a word to convey your disinterest.
“And why would I do that?” You asked him, paying this merchant so you could move on. You took a single step before Shanks had your wrist in his grasp, only loosely, but enough to make you stop in your tracks from surprise.
“Because I think Beck would like to see you.” And damnit, Shanks had said just the right thing. You slowly turned to face him, taking a moment to compose yourself and consider the man before you. Shanks may not be your favourite person, but he obviously cared about Beckman, and the look in his eyes said a thousand words that he hadn’t been able to.
“Okay. I’ll be there.” You agreed. You didn’t need to say anything more and Shanks didn’t ask it of you, just nodded and walked away again, as if there was no problem in the world that could weigh him down. You only wished you could be so careless, so free.
You enjoyed a light lunch and changed into something more beach appropriate before you headed down to the beach. You’d made sure to apply sun cream to everywhere exposed to the sun, your shirt buttoned most of the way up to protect your stomach from its rays, and your shorts knee length, enough to wade in the sea if you so desired but still covering your thighs and keeping you decent. You’d chosen to forgo underwear, again assuming there was a fair chance you’d end up in the ocean at some point, and had a towel thrown over your shoulder for you to use to lay on the sand in comfort.
Several of the guys began cheering as they spotted you, only serving you make you laugh, and jog the remaining few metres to the beach to join them. A beer was thrust into your hand near immediately, and you quickly decided that you would ensure this was the only one you’d be handed, sipping it so slowly, or not at all, so that it never became empty. When you spotted Benn, he was talking casually with Hongo, about something that you couldn’t hear - the doctor spotted you first, perking up and pointing you out to make Benn turn and set his eyes on you.
To him, nobody had ever looked more perfect than you did in that moment. Whether you believed the same was irrelevant, because to Benn you were nothing short of radient, god-like even. Fuck the Celestial Dragons, they’d clearly never met you, because how anyone could believe those fools were Gods when someone like you walked the Earth amongst mere mortals was beyond him. He only wished you’d chosen to dress a little more sparsely, show off more skin, so he could see more of what Gods were supposed to look like.
You caught the way his expression changed from near-bored to elated upon seeing you, but you didn’t put two and two together - it wasn’t worth reading into, lest you end up hurt because of it. Benn stood to greet you and pulled you into a warm hug, followed by Hongo, who whispered teasingly into your ear a soft, “someone has a crush,” and your response was simply to shove him with a laugh. You weren’t reading into it, because you couldn’t afford that risk to your own heart.
Surprisingly, the party wasn’t as bad as you’d expected it to be. It was loud, it was rowdy, the guys got drunk - all things you’d been expecting - but it turned out when you weren’t expected to clean up after them and attempt to keep them contained, it almost became fun to be amongst them. Limejuice pulled you into dancing around the bonfire with him, passing you off to Lucky Roux, and then to Rockstar, laughing all the while. You hoisted Hongo up onto your shoulders to do some team wrestling out in the sea, then were lifted onto Benn’s after Hongo fell but you remained standing. It was oddly intimate, to be in such close proximity, to have his head between your thighs, trusting you there despite realistically not even knowing you.
Or did he? After all, after a dozen evenings together spent talking about yourselves and life at large, maybe Benn had ended up getting to know you better than you realised. Maybe, out of all the friends you’d had over the years and the potential romances that ended, he knew you best of all. Perhaps, somehow, in such a short time Benn Beckman had begun to oddly feel like home.
When you fell into the cold ocean waters, spluttering and then laughing, forcing you out of your mind, you found Benn’s eyes. He grinned at you, then threw himself up to his feet, running after you. You scrambled for a moment then dove deeper into the water, swimming away from him as best as you could. You lived near the coast, so you were no slouch when it came to swimming, but Benn was a pirate and so neither was he. Eventually, he did catch you, and threw you over his shoulder as best as he could while swimming, unable to reach the floor. He didn’t release you until he was back on the beach, and the two of you were still laughing. Like you were unable to stop. The other guys crowded around, laughing and teasing. You endured, and then slipped away when given the chance, to dry off a little, then lay down on your towel to allow the setting sun to do what it could to the rest of the water.
It’d been a long time since you’d had unrestrained fun like that, able to laugh so freely, and feel truly unburdened.
You remembered, into a sobering moment, the thought you’d had earlier that day as you watched Shanks walk away. That you wished you could be as free as him. For just a moment, you were sure you’d felt it, the way he felt each and every day of his life.
When Benn dropped down on his own towel beside you, you forced the oddly melancholy feeling down, and focused on him. He said nothing, just shuffled in closer, and looked out to the horizon to enjoy the sunset. With the other guys breaking out into song, still drinking and laughing around the fire, it created a soft, warm atmosphere that you could enjoy without guilt. You looked out at the horizon too, and wondered if the two of you saw the same things in it, the same innate beauty of nature.
Over time, the two of you slowly inched closer, until the full line of your body was pressed against his. It’d grown colder, evening winds not sharp but still chilling, making goosebumps rise across the skin of your exposed arms and legs. At some point, Hongo had stopped over and tossed blankets at the two of you to guard against the cold, and you were grateful for it. Benn had taken control, and wrapped one around both of your shoulders, and set the other across both your laps, so that you could both enjoy the most comfort from them.
Someone at the bonfire was still singing, but a softer song now, and had pulled an instrument from who knows where. It was soothing almost, and for just a moment, you closed your eyes to enjoy the feeling. Or maybe it was more than a moment because next you knew, Benn was speaking.
“You’re on my shoulder, doll.” He said softly, and you felt a heat rushing to your cheeks that was entirely uncalled for in the cool of the evening.
“Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention, I can-”
“Didn’t tell you t’ move.” He said, and seamlessly wrapped an arm around your waist to instead keep you in place, close to him.
“You sure?” You asked, voice so soft you were sure for a moment that he hadn’t heard you, after all the boys were still hardly quiet.
“‘m sure. Stay.” And who were you to argue with that, really? You stayed.
You stayed much longer than intended, allowing your eyes to fall closed again, and for time to pass faster than you strictly would’ve liked. The guys slowly trailed off into the Red Force to rest for the night, but Benn didn’t move. A solid, safe presence, a vigil over your still, exhausted form. You’d not realised just how tired you were, not physically, but emotionally. Drained from work, from social obligations, from never stopping. Time was still as you sat beside Benn, curled into his side, its cruel intentions were unable to reach you with him guarding you as he was.
Some day soon, the Red Haired Pirates would leave, and you would remain here. This was your home, and you wouldn’t leave it to go with them as they chased their dreams. You would remember them fondly though, would remember this special slice of peace that Benn was able to gift you with, if only for a moment.
“Come on, handsome. I think it’s time for bed.” Benn said softly, his idly caressing finger stopping their movements as if to gently bring you back to full awareness.
“Could sleep here.” You said softly, unsure whether it was a statement or suggestion.
“I noticed, but that’d be real bad for your back. Come on, I’ll walk you home.” He suggested, and you nodded blindly. He helped you back up to your feet, and the two of you walked back to your place hand in hand, saying nothing.
You felt young again, in a way that you hadn’t in a very long time. Like this was your first love for the second time. But it couldn’t be love, you wouldn’t let it be, because otherwise when you parted ways, you’d be left behind in pieces.
“You’re a real special guy, you know.” Benn said softly as you hesitated at your front door, knowing you should head inside, but unable to commit to turning the handle.
“So are you.” You replied, reaching out to slip your fingers into his again, drawn back to him like he had a magnetic pull all his own.
“We leave soon.” He said as a gentle breeze slipped by, as if it could carry his confession away.
“I know.”
“Three days.”
“Longer than I thought .” There was a long pause then, and a huge cavern opening between you. Both of you wanted to say more, to make a suggestion or open an offer, but neither could find the words to do it.
“If things for different, I might ask you on a date.” You admitted, finally turning the handle of your door, pushing it open slowly. Benn stepped after you, closing the physical space with ease, but it did nothing for the emotional space.
“I’d say yes. Again and again.”
“Maybe one day, if you come back here, I’ll ask you then.” You suggested, words coming out just barely more than a breath, as Benn inched in closer, until hardly a hair separated your lips.
“I’d like that.” He confirmed, and then his lips were pressed against yours.
In three days time, Benn was going to leave, and he was taking your heart with him. You weren’t sure you minded, anymore.