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It was a dark night somewhere in the Kalos region. Ash and Pikachu sat at the edge of the group’s camp and stared at the stars. Pikachu had been cuddled up to Ash’s side and cooed as Ash petted his fur.
He had done a lot of thinking. Not the regular kind, where he strategizes his next gym battle or tries to identify his Pokémon’s weaknesses. This was different and it was bothering him.
He probably should blame himself for even thinking about it so much. However, if he were honest, he was blaming Miette for her sly question.
“Do you have anyone to take care of you?” She had asked him with a smirk.
Luckily for him, Serena had cut into the conversation because he had been dumbfounded by the question. All that everyone (Bonnie) had talked about since getting there was people ‘taking care’ of each other.
Ash understood that they were just going about romance in a different way than he had seen in the past. He just didn’t understand why it was bothering him now.
The question had sparked a sense of longing. When it was worded like that he believed that he would like it. He wanted someone to take care of him.
There was only one person in mind that he could think of wanting to take care of and have it reciprocated. This led him to his current problem. He was constantly thinking about what it meant to have this person in mind.
The girl on his mind was most likely halfway across the world, blowing minds with her performances and Pokémon. She probably wasn’t even thinking about him!
Ash sighed aloud and let his head hit the trunk of the tree harder than he’d like, but his mind continued.
The last he had heard of Dawn was that she had won the Wallace Cup for the fourth year in a row. Whenever he saw the latest editions of “Coordination Weekly” he would immediately grab one without thinking twice.
He had read in magazines that she was predicted to win the upcoming Johto Grand Festival. If she were to win that, she would be placed into Professional Contests.
Ash always tried not to sound more excited about Dawn’s achievements over his other coordinator friends. Especially after Bonnie commented on it. He didn’t want his friends to think he had favorites.
However, a part of him argued with himself because he had always felt that Dawn was different than all of his other friends.
For a long time he didn’t understand why. However, that was changed when Miette asked him that damned question that made his brain realize that he had a crush.
The realization hit him in a way that he had never expected. Instead of seeing small things that constantly reminded him of her like before, now he was just pining.
He missed Dawn.
He missed everything about her, from her carefree attitude to her morning bedhead. He even missed her Pokémon. It was weird how this was slowly starting to eat away at him.
All of his thoughts halted to a stop when he heard a crunching sound behind him. He swung his head around to see that Serena had snuck up to him and stepped on a branch. He sighed in relief and gave her a smile.
“Hey.” He said.
“Hi.” She chirped back. “What are you doing up so late?”
He looked at her before turning to look back at the stars.
“I’m just thinking. I couldn’t sleep. You?”
“I originally fell asleep, but when I woke up I saw that you weren’t at the campsite. I decided to come out and look for you.”
Ash hummed in response and decided to drift back off into his head. He continued petting Pikachu.
”Ash, are you okay?”
The question caught his attention. Did she notice how Miette’s question affected him?
“Yeah? Why would you ask that?” He tried to respond in a regular manner, but he cringed to himself as he realized he sounded stand-offish.
“You’ve been acting weird ever since the baking contest at Cyllage City. Did something happen?” Serena’s voice sounded worried.
It made Ash feel guilty for feeling defensive. Serena was his friend, he shouldn’t have panicked.
A small thought reached the back of his mind and it was tempting.
Talk to her about how you’re feeling.
The thought was weird considering that he was not someone to talk about feelings. However, he had never been in a situation like this before. He didn’t even realize he had a crush until the object of his affections was halfway across the world.
He decided that he needed to bite the bullet and have this uncomfortable conversation with a friend that he knew wouldn’t judge.
“Actually, there is something that I want to talk about.” He looked down at Pikachu, who had since crawled in his lap.
“Okay, anything you need!” Serena seemed eager and sat beside him.
“You promise not to laugh at me, right? This is all new to me.”
“Okay?” Serena seemed confused, but it shifted to understanding. “I promise not to judge you.”
Ash smiled at that, relieved. He looked to the sky to calm his nerves.
“It’s about what Miette asked me before the PokePuff contest.”
He immediately felt Serena tense at the comment. He ignored the feeling that she could already be judging him.
“When she asked me if I had anyone to take care of me, I was so happy that you stepped in so that I never had to answer. Thank you.” He looked at her and her face seemed shocked.
Okay, she definitely was not judging him.
“You’re welcome.” She said in a quiet voice.
“Ya’know out of my 9 years of traveling, I never thought of romance, in the sense that I wanted to pursue it. I was too focused on my Pokémon to even consider it.”
Serena began to play with her hair. Ash had no idea why Serena was nervous. He was the one spilling his feelings out to her.
“I’ve travelled with a lot of people and Pokémon. I’ve encountered many romantic situations and I never understood the fuss about it. But when Miette asked me that question, something seemed to click into place.”
Serena had been silent the whole time. Now she stared at him intently, like she was trying to predict what he would say next.
“I realized that I do want someone to take care of me and I want to take care of them.”
Ash took a deep breath to calm himself down. His cheeks began to fluster. He really didn’t like talking about feelings.
“Do you have anyone in mind?” Serena’s voice cut through the silence.
Her voice sounded so shaky that it took Ash by surprise. He began to look at the ground in concentration. His heart beat picked up as he realized he’d have to voice his desires.
“Yes.” He took a deep breath. “I do.”
“Do I know them?” She asked.
“No.” He answered, voice shaking. “I traveled with her before I came here.”
She silently nodded and became quiet. The two sat there for a while.
“Tell me about her.” Serena’s voice sounded emotional.
Ash didn’t know whether or not to ask her if she was okay or tell her about Dawn.
“When I first met her, I saw myself in her. She’s probably the first person that I met who knew who they were destined to become.” Ash looked to the sky as he thought of Dawn. “She wanted to be like her mother, a famous top-coordinator. However, when I met her, she was over confident. Just like I was when I first became a trainer. When we started traveling together we butted heads a lot, then we became a team that was unstoppable.”
“She sounds great.” Serena said.
Ash couldn’t tell by the tone of her voice, but one half of her was heartbroken. She had spent years thinking of him and who he could be. When she saw him on TV a few months ago, she’d believed that it was fate.
Fortunately the other half of her felt relieved. She now didn’t feel the need to confess her love like Miette had pushed her to do by the next time they crossed paths.
She now knew that he already had someone else in mind and she suspected that his feelings for herself were 100% platonic. Serena felt a throbbing pain in her chest, but she decided to push through her hurt for Ash.
“She is.” Ash said before knocking his head into the tree again. “I don’t know what I’m going to do now. All of this is making me feel crazy. I miss Dawn so much.”
Serena laughed because that’s exactly how she felt traveling with Ash these past few months.
"I've never met someone who loves Pokémon as much as I do until I met Dawn." Ash's eyes seemed to gleam as he thought of her. "She is probably one of the most hardheaded person I've ever met, but she was also the kindest. Before I met her, she saved and protected Pikachu from Team Rocket."
Serena's heart ached at each word that he spoke. Ash talked about Dawn with so much love and admiration, the same way that she had hoped that he would talk about her.
However, she was also partially glad to learn that Ash had romantic feelings for someone else. Now she could focus on moving on. Maybe she’d even work harder to find something that interests her to pour her heart into.
“Maybe you should call her.” Serena suggested after calming herself down with a deep breath. She then turned to Ash, only to be confused by his horrified expression. “What?”
“I can’t talk to her now!” He yelped. “I only just realized why I feel like this. I don’t even know how I can even look at her the same. I’ll embarrass myself.”
Ash placed his head in his head and groaned. He even felt embarrassed for sharing this information, thankfully Serena has not judged him.
“Well, what happened to the Ash that I know?” Serena asked sternly. “Why do you sound like you’re giving up? You’ve just realized your feelings.”
Ash began tapping his leg as his nerves got the better of him.
“But what if she doesn’t feel the same?”
Serena stood up and looked down at him sternly.
“You don’t know that! You don’t even have to tell her, I just suggested that you call her.”
“I can’t even think of a reason to call her, let alone have a conversation. I feel like everything has changed.” Ash stammered.
He wasn’t wrong. Now that he is looking at their friendship in a new light, he realized he wanted more. He wanted hugs instead of high fives.
The thought of her was even making him blush. He had a feeling in his chest that was tingling and he felt his upper body warm up as he focused on thinking of her.
Serena watched him silently. She thought she had it bad for him, but as she observed she realized that he probably had a bigger crush than her.
She sighed, her heart still hurt. However, she was glad that she could end this.
“Just call her and catch up with her. Maybe you can invite her to travel with us for a few days.” She yawned when Ash looked at her in panic. “I’m going back to bed now, goodnight Ash.”
Ash wanted to stop her from leaving but he decided against it and leaned back onto the tree.
As he stared at the sky, he considered her words. He felt much better after talking to Serena, but he felt that his brain was still in a light panic mode.
He continued thinking. He thought about Miette’s question, Serena’s advice, and about Dawn.
Surely Dawn would like to travel in Kalos for a bit. The thought of potentially traveling with her again made him feel giddy. Maybe he could do this.
“Pikachu.” Ash woke his companion. “We’re going to call Dawn at the next PokéCenter.”
Pikachu lit up at his trainer.
“Now it’s time for us to go to bed.” Ash picked up the mouse Pokémon and walked back to the campsite. He looked back up at the sky and prayed that he could eventually make his move.