Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Are you sure?" Josie asked with a concerned look on her face as the repairman crouched down, head stuck into the hood of the car as he inspected it. That damn car always gave her problems but today it was awful. Just that afternoon she was sitting in the parking lot of office she worked at ready to go home after a long day, her car had other plans though. It was heating up, smoking, leaking fluids, and worst of all not starting. Of course, she then had to call a tow truck to go pick up her car and haul it into a repair shop which was a hefty bill of $150 and now they were asking for an inspection fee.

"I don't know lady," he mumbled, wiping his brow with the back of his hand. "Your transmission looks pretty beat up, I'd wanna keep your car here to inspect it a bit more." He lowered the hood of her car and patted it, a long sigh escaped her lips. She ran her fingers through her auburn curls, this look of irritation and defeat playing on her features. Deep down she knew this was going to cost a whole lot of money, a whole lot of money she didn't have at the moment.

"And how much will that cost?" She asked, chewing at her lip as her mind racked through the expense.

"Well it's $250 for the inspection," even the sound of a number that high pained her, that was grocery money right there. "And if we need to replace the transmission that's gonna be $5,000 to $5,500." Oh she'd crumble to her knees right now if she wasn't in public, a weak mumble escaped her lips before she nodded.

"Ahhh... alright." She could afford this, she'd just have to skimp out on food for a bit, pay little chunks once a month, be in debt for a while, and for the time being she could walk to work, the office was only a 15-minute walk away. "Uhm yeah no, I can uhmmm..." she bit on her lip a little harder, "we can do that, I'll pay for the inspection fee."

The man took her to the front part of the shop as she begrudgingly paid for the inspection, her shoulders slouched while doing so.

"I'll keep the car in for tonight and call you tomorrow, tell you what's up." She nodded and shot him a half smile before shoving her hands far into her pockets.

"Got it, thank you," she mumbled out under her breath. She slowly walked out the shop before checking her gps, 20-minute drive away from home, she couldn't imagine what that walk would be. A strong frown grazed her lips while ordering an uber, another $25 dollars down the drain.

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A smile stayed plastered on his lips as his worked about, the cold autumn air felt nice on his skin. Him and his team were putting down the framing for an apartment complex about to be built in the city. Honestly Tony loved his work, it was physically taxing, yes but a part of that was what made him like the job so much. He couldn't imagine picking up work where he just sat around all day, he relished in the physical labor.

As of currently he was lifting up a beam as another hammered it in, setting up the skeleton for the apartment to be. Through the tall wired gate closing off the construction site to the public he could see cars drive past. Often his peers would call out to and joke at the people waking by the construction site, cat calling and whistling to the women. He tried to not indulge but it was so damn fun sometimes messing with the civilians as he worked.

So as he held up the beam he could feel his attention drift away to the all too common hooting and hollering of his colleagues, presumably a girl walking past the gates as always. He let his eyes play over when he finally saw her. His cheeks flushed up a bit, his throat tight, she was... Jesus she was...

He didn't even know how to describe it.

Of course he'd seen pretty women before and this girl wasn't anything new but for some odd reason he felt this enticing wave wash over him. Something in him screamed he had to talk to her but instead he just stood there slack jaw like an idiot.

She was wearing these chocolate brown bell bottoms witch a frilly cherry red top over, a caramel tan bomber jack over it all. Her copper curls were pulled into a ponytail, bangs sweeping to the side with these burgundy almond shaped glasses settled on the bridge of her nose. She had had on these chunky headphones and an unbothered expression written on her face. As the men called out to her, she didn't pay it no mind, just continuing to walk before leaving his sight.

He took a second to catch his breath, a little dazed from that feeling, whatever the hell that feeling was which consumed him as he saw her. He pushed back his hair and huffed, eyebrows furrowing before he got back to work as always, pushing aside the sudden infatuation which plagued his mind.

That was weird

He thought to himself before just shrugging it off, shaking his head lightly.

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"Ahh mon ami! How was walking?" Jean teased out with a little grin, he was just another worker and one of Josie's closest friends, they got unbearably close after she crap (cool rap) battled him. She just shot Jean a little smile, taking off her headphones.

"Honestly it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be," she admitted, slipping her headphones into her bag as they walked to Jeans cubicle. "But then again my music was pretty loud, so I think it helped me just zone out. I was completely unaware of my surroundings, I swear I could've got like robbed and not realize until it the headphones were off."

"Oh!" Jean quipped out, settling his bag before sitting at his desk. "That doesn't sound ehh how you Say? safe," Jean said in a tone full of certainty which was rather funny to Josie since he always happened to be the more reckless one out of the two. 

"Ahhh come onnn let a women live!" She teased out, a smile playing on her lips before sighing. "I gotta go print out some form. If I don't Mr. Most will be up my ass." She mumbled, rubbing the back of her neck.

"Okay yeah, you go have fun with that, au revoir, off with you." Jean hummed making her roll her eyes. Honestly working at a shitty office wasn't that bad. Sure the pay was crap and the hours even worse but she had Jean and at the end of the day that was all that really mattered to her.

the rest of the day was a drag as per usual, she tried to not be so mopey around her coworkers but the fee of her run-down car was weighing on her mind, she didn't know how she'd deal with paying it off. That night Jean drove her home, that was going to be the new schedule they'd both agreed upon, Josie would walk to work in the mornings then Jean would drive her back. She didn't mind it much, she was just thankful for Jeans support during such a turbulent time in her life.

That night she was settled in bed, her laptop on as she scribbled in her journal about her day before her phone rang out, it was the repair shop. A sense of dread washed over her as she slowly picked up the phone and answered.

"Uhh, hello?" She asked, pausing the music which was playing from her computer.

"Yeah hey is this miss uhmm... Elmond?" The man over the other end of the phone questioned.

"Yes this is she," she mumbled out.

"Oh okay, yeah bad news we're going to have to replace your transmission. After our guys took a look over we noticed it was pretty damaged, ware and tare kinda thing. You drive an old car." He stated making her sigh out.

"Yeah I've had this car for a while now," she pinched her brow in frustration.

"Well you heard the pricing, I'm pretty sure it's gonna be around $5,000 ma'am." She let out a long groan and sunk into her bed, she did not want to think about this right now.

"Okay... okay," she shut her eyes before playing with her curls. "I can put that on credit yeah?" She inquired, head resting on her pillow.

"Mhm, yeah I can set that up now."

So she spent about thirty minutes talking to the man about how she could put the payment down on credit, discussing it all before she could finally hang up. That money was not going to be easy for her to get together but she had to one way to another.

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"I'm thinkin Jesus..." He mumbled into the phone which was rested on his shoulder as he sawed some wood. His eyebrows furrowed in concentration, "okay okay I got it!" He stopped for a second to clap his hands together. "Instead of hallways we do slip and slides! you can just slide around all day, completely time efficient right!"

"Tony, I- what?" Rainey groaned out over the phone, he could only imagine how hard she was face palming right now. "I'm not following," she muttered.

"Aww come on Rains, come onnn!" He cooed out, a stupid dopey smile on his face, "comeeee onnnn Raineyy! You know what I'm talking about!" He called out with a laugh. She let out a huff over the phone.

"Oh I'm not doing this with you again." She stated making him frown softly.

"What? What did I do?!" He moped out.

"No Tony no cause when you say ohh you know what I'm talking about!" She groaned, mocking his voice. "Then I say I know what you're talking about and then you say you know what I'm talking about, and it never ends!" He just huffed and leaned back letting out a soft chuckle.

"Awh alright then, you know me too well Rains." He muttered before his ears perked to that all too familiar sound of his coworkers hollering. He let his eyes drift over to where they were calling out to when he saw her again, his heart skipped a beat.

"What is it?" Rainey asked out over the phone, she could hear all the cat calling.

"Ahh nothin, just this pretty broad," he mumbled out absentmindedly. "The doll walked past here yesterday, looks like she's off to work or somthin."

"Oh, are you going to talk to her or...?" She asked out which he quickly shook his head to.

"Nahh she probably wouldn't hear, wears these bulky headphones," he began. "I don't think it's clicked for the other guys though, the keep whistlin and callin and she doesn't respond, just keeps walkin."

"Hmm," Rainey mumbled out. "Seems like your type huh, hard to get?" She teased.

"Yeah yeah whatever you keep jokin Rains, I don't think I'll go for it" he watched as the girl continued to walk off till she was out of his sight. "She's a looker though," the conversation of the mystery girl fizzled out before they continued to talk about something else, his mind stayed on that girl though. He had to get to know her.

had to...

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Three days had passed, five of her officially walking to work and honestly, she wasn't too upset about it. It felt nice getting her steps in every morning and that 15 minutes of music defiantly made her mood until of course it didn't. The night before she forgot to charge her headphones which meant she'd have to walk and listen to regular boring unmusical sounds of the city. 

The only thing she could look forward to was getting her car back, the repair shop had to order the transmission for her which took a three day delivery meaning it came in today. From that she was told it would take the shop three to four days to fully take out her old parts and put in the new. She couldn't wait to get her car back, she could finally drive around instead of taking bus or asking for a lift. She wouldn't kick off walking to work though, made her feel all healthy and energized plus with how gas prices were she didn't feel too keen on wasting her money on a drive she could easily turn into a walk. 

She filled the unmelodious air with her own little hums, boots crunching the crisp fall leaves under each step she took. For once she finally looked around, without music playing in her ears she just felt more aware of her surroundings. She usually spent these morning fantasizing to the tunes of each song but today she could take in the walk. Her eyes played to each little shop, to the cars and people strolling, to the leaves as they fell from the sky, to everything. Half way through her walk her eyes settled on a construction site, it looked as if an apartment was being built. She'd never really noticed it before, never cared to but today she paused, looking around at the site before deciding to continue her walk until. 

"Hey wait! Glasses! You, c'mere!"

"I- what?!"

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Three days had passed, five of him officially seeing this girl through the gates and honestly, he felt conflicted. He didn't even know her, not a single thing yet there was something in him that just wanted to get to know her, he felt such a strong attraction towards the girl. He knew it was most likely physical but still he didn't know how to act. Every time she'd walk past with those thick headphones he'd subconsciously smile, let his heart run off. 

"I think what you're looking for is a rebound," Rainey said to him softly one day as they drank coffee in her little apartment. She sat there all pretty like always, playing with a curl as Tony brooded over a cup of black. 

"I'm not followin doll," he mused with a feigning laugh, sipping his coffee as Rainey looked at him with a raised brow. 

"Oh come on!" Rainey sighed, rolling her eyes as she sat back against the cushion of her sofa. "You break up with Tina and then this pretty thing strolls in out of nowhere and you fall immediately in love." Rainey gave him a knowing shrug before sipping her coffee again as he thought over her words. "I'm just saying, I don't think you like her like that, I think you're lonely." Her words were blunt and cut through Tony like a knife, he didn't want to admit to the fact that he'd been feeling alone.

"I- Whatttt?!" He laughed out nervously, sitting up quick. "Me, lonely? Pfttt as if!" He retorted, "if I was really that lonely I'd call up one of the many, many, many!" Rainey sighed, "many girls begging for some of this." He motioned to himself with a sly smile, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

"Okay then tell me, what's it about her? What do you like?" Rainey questioned, leaning in as he thought. 

"Uhmm well she's a looker... nice style too..." He mumbled with a knitted brow.  

"And?" she asked. 

"And? And what? I hardly know the girl, haven't talked to the girl. what do you expect me to say Rains!" He insisted with irritation stringing his voice, he didn't like being questioned like this. "You want me to pull out her social security number, ma's maiden name, her deepest darkest secrets. I don't know her! I just like lookin at her!" Rainey huffed and shook her head gently.

"Jesus Ton, no need to get defensive." She raised her hands in surrender, a little pout on her lips. "But what I'm trying to get across is you can't carry a torch for a girl you don't know." Tony raised an eyebrow. 

"Huh?"

"You can't get a crush on some random girl. It's more than just physical attraction you know, that's all just lust." She waved her hand away, "it's about a person's character too. Who knows, I mean she could be a dame but that doesn't keep her from being a wet blanket." He sighed and nodded before taking a sip of his coffee. 

"Yeah yeah okay..." He shrugged before letting his shoulders slump a bit. "Thanks for the advice Rains." 

"Course, any time." She smiled before sitting up, a look of accomplishment curling along her lips.

That conversation was shared just last night and it hung heavy in his mind. It only seemed to reinforce the idea that he had to find an excuse to talk to this girl. So today as he worked he made sure to keep one eye on the gate, today was the day, he would finally talk to her and talk to her he did. 

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She walked over cautiously to the construction gate, searching for whoever called her out, a bit flustered from being caught off guard. There stood a man with a strong build and caramel tan skin, black hair strewn off to the side. He was wearing some dirty patched up work overalls, a gray v neck shirt under with a little necklace hung over. He had an infectious smile on his lips as his gloved hand settled on his hip leading to an arm adorned with tattoos. She pointed at herself with a confused expression. 

"You're talking to me?" She coughed out, a weak smile coming up on her face that could only be described as one of bewilderment. She tilted her head to the side as he nodded with the biggest grin. 

"Yeah, you. Who else would I be talking to?" The man chuckled as he leaned against the gate, gripping the wire 

"Oh uhm?" She cleared her throat as she watched him, pushing up her glasses with an anxious laugh. She felt timid and incredibly lost, people didn't just talk to her like this. "Well what do you want?" she mused, fiddling with one of her curls. 

"Ahh well I just wanted to say hi sweetheart. You've been ignoring the boys so I figured I'd step up and catch your attention." He motioned to the other men on site who were now closely watching this conversation unfold.

"Jeez I'm sorry," she muttered out with a feeling of guilt swirling inside her, she didn't want to seem rude to anyone. "It's my music, I bump it so loud I can hardly hear anything," She laughed. "I don't have my headphones today though so that's why I'm... y'know, talking to you." 

"Music must be too damn good then?" He tossed her a playful smirk before shrugging and laughing at his own joke. She just gave him a blank expression, trying to dissect the man, she had a pretty good grasp of what he was trying to do though. "I'm Tony by the way, friends call me Ton." He tried to stick his hand through the gate for her to shake but he only got out his fingers. 

"Err well I'm Josie." She took his fingertips and shook them, the fabric of the gloves dirty and a bit oily from working on the site making her cringe, he didn't seem to notice. 

"Hmm, a pretty name for a pretty girl," he teased putting on his best charming expression as she starred. It wasn't just the fact that she was thrown off her regular schedule which had her dazed and uptight, it was this guy in general. She could quite obviously tell her was trying to hit on her and the thought of that alone made her feel all slimy. He seemed like a cheap sleaze, an attractive sleaze sure but still a sleaze. 

"Aww thanks," She cooed halfheartedly, her eyes darting to him as he fist pumped at her words.

"So you headin off to work orrr..." he drawled on.

"Mayhap," she mumbled. 

"May what now?"

"Y-yeah I'm going to work," she pinched her brow gently, trying to not get irritated with him. 

"Ohhh alright!" He laughed, flashing her a smile. "What do you do?"

"I work at Valdivian, customer service, I hate it a lot actually." She chuckled, glancing to the side before looking back at him again. Her eyebrows knitted as he grinned at her, she didn't get it, why her, why did this man want to stop her morning walk to talk. 

"Oh yeah no that sounds sucky," he shrugged before pushing back his hair. "Hey guess what I do!" He giggled out with a big smile. 

"Uhm... construction?" She asked, looking at the site. 

"Oh my God, how'd you know that!" He had this genuine look of excitement and shock which only seemed to irritate her more. She just didn't get it, was he actually this dense or was he fucking with her. A scoff escaped her lips as she raised her eyebrows at him. 

"Jeez I don't know, I'm just that smart." She muttered out sarcastically, pushing back her hair and shaking her head as she struggled to hide how annoyed she was. 

"Yeah, you got those intelligent glasses!" He hummed, pointing to her spectacles with a dumb grin. 

"Yeah no my glasses totally helped with solving that horribly intensive mystery." She just let out a sigh before looking at her phone, checking the time. "Oh shoot and look at that! Seems like I gotta go. I'll see you soon Tony, pleasure meeting." She mumbled out quickly, walking off with a brisk pace. 

"Yeah I'll see you soon Josie!" He called out with a laugh as she sped walked away. 

The rest of the walk was a blur as she tried to wrap her head around the conversation she shared with that Tony. She couldn't help but groan, with how coy the man was being she could only assume he was looking for an easy hook up and she was not willing to be that. He was good looking though, that was for sure, she wouldn't admit it to herself but the man's looks were also a heavy factor to why she found herself so frazzled while talking to him. 

She just shook her head and kept walking, that was stupid and a waste of time. She wouldn't be lying if she said he caught her attention though. 

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"Rainey."

"Tony what th- I told you to stop calling me so late..." She groaned out over the phone. 

As soon as he finished that conversation with that girl which he now knew was named Liv it couldn't get off his mind. She was absolutely everything he wanted and more, she was perfect. So here he was sat in bed with the biggest grin, struggling to sleep as Rainey settled on the other end of the phone. A little laugh escaped his lips as he leaned against the bed frame. 

"She's so into me." 

Chapter Text

"I absolutely scored that! I was all like hey I'm Tony and she was like oh Tony you're the most sexy strong man I've ever seen!" He laughed out with a confident smile, back rested on the bed frame. "You should've seen her face, she was all blushing and shit, totally checking me out." Rainey exhaled gently, she was much too tired to deal with Tony right now. 

"Wow Tons that just uhmm swell," she huffed as he smiled proudly, running his fingers through his hair. "I'm sure you have her swooning already," she had this air of sarcasm in her voice yet Tony was clearly oblivious to it all. 

"I'm gonna try and talk to her tomorrow, get my charm on," he sighed out contently, playing with his dark strands. "Mayhap I'll get her number too!" He chuckled, the sound of Rainey sighing apparent over the line. 

"Mayhap you'll get her number... Ton that not even how you use that, I-" She huffed, tone stringed with irritation. "Where did you even learn that word?"

"Josieee!" He mused out with a sweet hum, a dopey smile riddling on his lips. 

"The woman must use big words, I'm surprised you even understand her." She mumbled that last part under her breath, just soft enough so Tony couldn't hear.

"Hmmm?"

"Nothing Tons," she huffed, "I said nothing."

"Uh huh," a long yawn escaped his lips, his hand going up to rub his tired eyes. "Anyways, good talk, I'm gonna go to bed." Rainey let out a thankful sigh at his words. 

"Okay then casanova," she teased, making Tony roll his eyes dismissively. "Good luck with the girl, night."

"Luck, I won't need luck. This is pure personality." He laughed out confidently. "But still, thank you Rains. Goodnight." 

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Rap, she wasn't big on rap but for Jean she'd listen to just about anything. Jean loved rapping or what he called crapping (cool rapping) but recently the words just weren't coming to him, something he'd constantly complain to her about. This morning though when she received a text containing a link to Jean's latest track, it being a rough draft, she quickly listened in. The man's strong French accent gripped on each syllable like a vice, she couldn't fight the small giggles escaping her lips as she walked. It wasn't that his rapping was particularly bad, she just found his voice and the lyrics a little silly. As she walked through the city to work a small smile sat on her lips as she listened to his music, eyes searching around as the cool autumn air tinged her cheeks a subtle pink.

Her peaceful walk was interrupted by a now familiar face though, that man Tony was settled behind the gate waving and calling out to her. If it was any other man she'd bump her music up and keep walking but she'd talk to him and she didn't like being rude to people who knew her even if they were just acquaintances. A long sigh escaped her lips as she paused Jean's track, pulling off her headphones before plastering on a smile and walking over. 

"Tony... Hey," she muttered out, exasperation settled on her tongue. She watched as he quickly jogged up to her, a wide grin on his lips. 

"Heya doll," she watched as he brushed back his jet black hair, gripping the fence like last time and leaning against it. She internally cringed at him calling her doll, it sounded nice on his lips with that gruff voice of his but she didn't bend. She had a good idea of what his intentions were, yet another idiotic man looking for an easy chick, she could do better than that. She shook her head gently, mind drifting back to the conversation at hand. "whatcha listening to?" He asked out curiously, glancing over to the headphones which were settled in her hand. 

"Oh it's just," she didn't really know how to admit to him that she was listening to her friend's half finished track. Jean's music was a little embarrassing to talk about too, to put it lightly his lyrics weren’t the most of age. She did promise Jean she’d promote his music though so with a nervous laugh she cleared her throat. “Ahh nothing it’s just my friend, he’s like one of those sound cloud rappers. He sent me something in progress so I was just listening in.”

“A rapper, that’s fun. Slide over his name.” She bit her lip, of course he would ask for Jean's name. 

“Oh you want his name?” She quipped, voice riddled with embarrassment as Tony shot her a confused glance. 

“Yeah, what is it?”

“What is it?!” She chewed her lip a little harder before letting out a sigh, shaking her head. “It’s…” She let her words trail off into a nervous mumble making Tony lean in curiously. 

“What?” 

“It-” She shook her head before sighing, damn Jean and his immaturity. “Lil’crapper.” she coughed out, embarrassment riddled on her face as the sound of Jean's handle escaped her lips. 

“Lil’crapper?” He repeated as if he was trying to be certain he heard her right. 

“I know, Lil'crapper, he’s such a child!” She said quickly, shoving her hands into her pocket. “I mean seriously he’s in what his mid twenties and he’s still making pee pee poo poo jokes.” She pinched her brow like a frustrated mother would. “Don’t get me wrong I love the guy but sometimes I wish he’d be a little more grown-!” She continued her rant as Tony stood, watching her. She continued till the all too familiar sound of a laugh escaped Tony's throat making her snap her head to him, offence grazing her expression. 

“Wait wait!” He put his hands up defensively, trying to keep giggles from trickling out his lips. “I swear I’m not laughing at you! It's just Lil’crapper, seriously, that's hilarious!” She stood and watched with irritation as he laughed his ass off. It was hard enough dealing with an idiot like Jean but now she knew an idiot who found him funny, could her life get any worse?

“Very mature Tony,” she stated bluntly, crossing her arms as he continued to laugh. He shook his head and wiped a tear from his eye and smiled. 

“Come on, you have to appreciate true comedy when you see it,” He bit his lip gently, settling his laughs. There was a couple seconds of silence as she thought, very obviously annoyed by Tonys chuckles. 

“Shouldn’t you be working?” She quipped, looking around at the construction site through the wired fence. 

“Well yeah but the guys are letting me have a little break,” he began making her raise a brow. 

“Why?” She questioned. 

“Y’know cause I wanna talk to you,” He hummed out only fueling her confusion 

“Why do you wanna talk to me?” As soon as she said that it seemed his confident mask slipped, he scrambled to compose himself before shooting her a little smirk. 

“Awhh come on doll that isn’t important,” he waved his hand dismissively. “Less about me anyways let’s talk about something more interesting.” 

“Intresting, like what?” She asked, tilting her head to the side. 

“Like you.” She couldn’t help but let out a little groan, she hated how easily she fell into that one. 

“Like me?” She furrowed her eyebrows, deciding to entertain his advances for a second. “Well what do you wanna know?”

“For starters, how’d you get so pretty Josie,” ew. That was cheap, easy, not what she was into at all either. It only made her hate him a little more, he just thought he was so cute, she hated men like that. Ones who thought they could get whoever they wanted with a pretty smile and a couple kind words. She didn’t want to be that girl, the kind who got won over easily, she was more than something to be won. “Also can I call you Jo? I think something as cute as you deserves a nickname just as cute.” He smirked, she grimaced. 

“One, absolutely not, Jo is a horrible nickname.” She stated making him pout. “And secondly don’t talk to me like that, it feels degrading.” 

“Talk to you like what toots?” He asked, confusion tracing his features. 

“Like that! Like I’m just some pretty thing to be ogled!” She shook her head and huffed, “I mean we just met for Christ's sake and you’re already all flirty with me, It’s weird!” This genuine look of hurt came up on his face, his voice lowering to something a bit softer. 

“Shoot I’m sorry Josie… I’ll cut it out if you want me to.” He began yet this instant guilt flooded her heart, this guy was an absolute idiot but it pained her to see him frowning. 

“No no It’s fine I shouldn't have gotten upset.” She pinched the bridge of her nose, “It’s just frustrating.” Now she was the asshole, she hated this. She let her eyes meet his as she tried to think of a way to lighten up the conversation before blurting out the first thing that came to mind. “Y’know you’re such a himbo sometimes.”

“A what now?” He laughed, his voice coming back to its normal cocky color. 

“A himbo, like a guy bimbo.” She shook her head gently, a chuckle escaping her lips. “It’s like an attractive dude who’s like absolutely clueless about everything.” She laughed a bit more as he stood there shocked. “I’m not saying you’re dumb but from what I’ve seen you can be pretty clueless.” 

“You think I’m attractive?” He began, that being the only thing he took away from the conversation.

“Uhmm what?”

“You said an attractive dude, you find me attractive?!” This huge smile played on his lips, one full of confidence and a horribly inflated ego. 

“What!? No I meant that in a definition sense!” She began, cheeks quickly flushing an embarrassed red. “I mean yeah objectively you are attractive, you fit society's stereotype of attraction.” She pushed up her glasses, clearly frazzled. “But that doesn't mean I find you attractive! I’m just talking about from the viewpoint of our world's stance on looks!” She could defend herself all she wanted but he just stared with a knowing smile. 

“Uh huh… You tell yourself that Josie.” This was pathetic, she felt pathetic. Here she was blushing for a man she just got mad at for flirting with her. Of course the blush was from her being embarrassed, not cause he actually found him good looking. Oh she could never be into that, right?

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“And then she called me a Himbo,” he let his fingertip trace the rim of the tall glass, once filled with beer, now reduced to weak foam. “And then I think she was flirting with me? She called me cute but also didn’t? Girls are so confusing.” He shook his head, a frown on his lips. 

“Uhmm, rude?” The ginger from behind the bar laughed out. Beverly was the owner of the Tipsy Tumbler, a local bar which sadly didn’t get many customers. “Where's Rainey anyways? I miss my girl!” She joked, he sighed and sat back. 

“Ehh beats me,” he glances at his cup before holding it out to Beverly with this soft expression, as if he was asking for more. She rolled her eyes and complied, filling the glass up. “But seriously I need advice, I don’t get this one!” 

“Advice, y’know what I think,” She leaned in and rested her chin on the back of her hands. “I think you shouldn’t be going for another relationship this early.” Her words made him cringe, he didn’t like thinking about it, what he had, what he lost. 

“Rainey said the same thing, you two are no fun.” He sighed, taking a long sip of his drink. “Plus the guys on site say it’s a good idea.”

“That’s different though, they’re guys.” She shook her head lightly before getting back to wiping down the bar top. “I mean you and Tina broke up for a reason, maybe you should spend this time working on yourself. Stuff like that. I mean this is the longest you guys have been a part and you’ve been doing really good and I’m proud of you for that!” She continued as he thought. 

“Not long enough for me to get into another relationship though?” He quipped, making Beverly quickly shake her head. “How’s Tina anyways?” He asked with uncertainty, he couldn’t help it, the thought of how she was doing had been plaguing his mind for a long time now and he knew Beverly knew the answer to that. 

“I’m not telling you, that’s not going to help anything.” She laughed out before tossing the dirty rag to the side and beginning to mix herself a drink. 

“Aww come on doll pleaseee?” He practically begged before putting on his best puppy dog eyes making Beverly laugh out. “You can’t say no to this Bevvv! Come on!” He insisted before she sighed. 

“Okay okay, you won’t like it though.” She began to shake the cocktail shaker. She shook her head and sighed gently, “I’ve heard she's seeing some guy.” Her words cut through him like a knife, deep down there was always going to be a part of him that cared for Tina, that’s why he kept coming back, why he could never make progress. They constantly went on breaks, their relationship on and off yet he always found himself back in her arms as much as he didn’t want to be there. “I’m sorry Tony,” she muttered as he took a sip from his pint. 

“So what, she gets to be in a relationship right after we break up and I don’t?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowing, a bit of betrayal tinging his voice. “That isn’t fair,” he mumbled under his breath. 

“Tony she’s doing that cause she doesn't know any better,” she huffed out before pouring her drink into a glass. “But you do, you know better. Just be mature about this,” she moved to pat his shoulder. 

“Right, mature.” His shoulder slumped at the thought, Tina was out there happy with someone that wasn’t him, being loved by someone that wasn’t him. It wasn’t fair, why did she get to be loved while he was here struggling to pick up and collect the shattered pieces from a life he used to call his. 

“If you do want girl advice though,” she hummed out, making Tony quickly sit up. “I’d say take things easy on this one, for you and for her. When I say don’t go into a relationship right now that doesn't mean cut this new girl off cold turkey cause you clearly like her. Just get to know her, be her friend and if something happens then something happens. Don’t force it.” He soaked up her words before nodding and taking a long swig of his drink. 

“Course… Thanks Bev, that was really helpful.” He muttered out as she quickly nodded. 

“Yeah I got you!” She held up her drink, “now how about you give your girl a cheers, lighten up.” He couldn’t help but roll his eyes as he held up his glass with hers.

“Cheers!” He called as their glasses clinked against one another. 

He didn’t know what he was going to do with all these feelings, with this girl. Should he take everyone's advice and wait or should he throw himself head first into another relationship? Something new budded inside him too making his mind feel even more hectic, Tina. She was dating someone and he didn’t know how to feel about it, all he knew was that he wasn’t happy. 

“This girls a little weird though huh?” Beverly began after sipping her drink, resting her chin in her palm. "I mean who’s willingly friends with a Frenchman, especially one that raps. Sounds a little sketchy to me.” She joked, making Tony roll his eyes. 

“Oh come on, it's not that weird,” he chuckled. “I have this one guy who’s French, always calls me over when I do handy work. For some reason his toilet keeps breaking!” Beverly laughed out with him, her smile wide. 

“Seriously?!”

“Yes seriously! His hair is this obnoxious blue and his last name is like Pissoir or something like that, I forget.” He hummed out, resting his head against his hand. “She isn’t weird though she’s… something else, seriously it’s hard to explain.” A smile absentmindedly grazed his lips as he thought of Josie, Beverly just stared and laughed. 

“Holy shit you have it bad.” She giggled out making his cheeks tinge a pink, a rare shade on him.

“Oh shut up.” She was right though, he did have it bad.

really bad...

Chapter Text

A D20 rolled absentmindedly within her palm as she listened to yet another of the man's monologues. Table top roleplay happened to be one of her guilty pleasures, one she was not willing to admit to others. It was just so… nerdy? Plus the last thing Josie could possibly need was someone poking fun at her interests. Because of that she kept her affinity for GNG under many wraps, only mentioning it to friends she knew wouldn’t judge. She watched across the table as Chance spoke, it was big bad time and the group was readying up. The campaign was rather small, just her and Parker, Chance too if the man counted since he was the GM. 

During these sessions she often felt as if she was third wheeling since the two men were happily together. Parker had this dreamy expression on his face, chin resting in his hands as he watched Chance, the two were sickeningly cute together, it made her want to gag. Honestly they were perfect for each other, both matched one another's dorkiness to a T. Parker was so hyper all the time, she didn’t know if the man even blinked while Chance was on the calmer side, very grounding and sweet. To put it simply, they balanced each other out perfectly. 

Relationships though, God she hated those, whenever she hung out with these two it was like a blaring reminder to how lonely she actually was. She just didn’t get it, how people could find each other so easily. When Chance and Parker met it was like the heavens parted just for them, everything was perfect, horribly adorable. Then she was there, still alone, left to listen to it all, about how happy they were. Of course, she was happy they found one another but she couldn’t help but be a little jealous, she wanted something just like that. 

She was barely listening to Chance as he went on, her eyes drifting down to the dice in her hand, his voice easing into background sound to her messy swirling thoughts.

“Now beg, grovel as you pray I'll spare thine life!” A soft giggle escaped Chance's lips, breaking character for a second before pushing up his glasses. “The tiger Amup bellows down to you both with a formidable smile, sharp fangs glistening as his hot breath grazes your skin.” He frowned and glanced between the both of them. Parker had this love struck smile on his lips while Josie was sat brooding to herself. “I- are you guys even listening?”

His words pulled her out of her mind as a guilty expression traces her face. Parker quickly shook his head, clearing his throat as he tried to conceal how infatuated he was. 

“Huh, what? Of course we are love!” Parker quickly chirped, putting on this innocent smile before glancing at Josie. 

“Ahhh yes, us, listening. We’re doing that, hundred percent!" She coughed, pushing up her glasses. Chance just sighed, shoulders slumping. 

“No, you don’t have to lie to me, it’s fine.” He huffed, looking away as he tried to mask the hurt in his voice. 

“Oh okay then, no I wasn’t listening at all.” Parker blurted out, making Josie stomp his foot under the table. 

“N-no we were listening! Chance we wanted to listen!” She insisted, trying to be as kind as possible. “It’s just that we’re coming up on eight hours, that’s a lot of time roleplaying. You can’t expect us not to drift off a bit.” Chance nodded solemnly, concealing a little frown behind his GM screen 

“I get it,” he cleared his throat, “we can’t play all day! How about we end sesh here?” The two let out little relieved sighed before putting away their things, cleaning up the area. 

For the rest of the night she found herself settled in their cozy apartment. Parker had his head lovingly rested on Chance's chest as she kind of just sat there at the other end of the couch, watching. 

“I feel like a cuck,” she joked, leaning back against the couch cushions as a soft laugh escaped Parker's lips. He was beginning to fall asleep in Chance's arms, she couldn't help but smile, she didn’t think he was capable of relaxing. 

“That’s definitely a wake up call, we need to get you in a relationship quick.” Chance hummed, playing with Parker’s multicolored tufts of hair. 

“You’re going down a dark dark path,” Parker yawned out making her laugh a bit. 

“Oh we’re calling cuckholdry a dark path now? I’m wounded.” She giggled, putting her hand on her heart as this pained look settled on her face. 

“It’s an extremely dark path,” Chance snickered, eyes lidded as he admired the man who was falling asleep on his chest. “We’re not letting our Josie fall into voyeuristic tendencies.”  

“Isn’t Scandy a cuck?” Parker slurred, barely awake now. 

“Scandalabra is not a cuck! He’s a hair dresser!” She insisted, sitting up as his words, 

“You know you can be a cuck and a hairdresser at the same time right?” Chance huffed, pinching his brow. 

“Mmmm yeahhh like that movie… the one with that guy who kills the guys.” Parker yawned, nestling his head farther against Chance's chest. “The barbershop guy who kills people. He did hair dress and murder…! Sweeny whateva…” 

“What?” Josie shook her head and laughed as Parker's tired ramblings slowly came to a halt, getting replaced by a soft snoring. Chance giggled and pressed a kiss to the top of his head before looking across the couch to her, 

“This idiot,” he hummed before clearing his throat. “I’m serious about the whole you getting into a relationship thing though. I don’t like seeing you so lonely, it’s depressing.” She scoffed and rolled her eyes. 

“Sorry for depressing you.”

“I mean I’ve known you forever and you’ve had so many opportunities,” Chance laughed and shook his head. “You’re so picky.” 

“Me, picky!” She huffed as if he hurled the worst insult. 

“Yes, picky Josie. Sometimes the one might not look like the one at first.” He pushed back Parker's hair and smiled. “Sometimes love is a waiting game, and you Josie hate waiting.” 

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

A soft hum filled the room as he cooked, he wasn't the best cook per say but people always said he was so he was prone to believe that. Tonight, it was lasagna with cheese he borrowed from his neighbor, the sound of Katey Perry filled the kitchen. Yes, he loved pop music, no nobody knew, yes, he would take that to the grave. 

As he began to dice up the veggies consisting of onions, bell peppers, and garlic cloves his mind drifting to Josie, a smile playing on his lips at the thought. Beverly was right, he had it really bad. There was just something about her that pulled him in, something that he didn’t see in Tina when they first started talking.  

This morning marked the third day of him talking to Josie between the gate of his work and his days couldn’t get any better. He just didn’t get her though, whenever they talked she was a bit snappy, sarcastic in a way he couldn't read, somewhat mean. Not in a Tina way though, when Tina used to be mean to him she’d just be mean but when this girl was mean she was a bit more calculated about it. At least he felt like she was being mean, like said he couldn’t read her like he could with most women. 

He was just used to people taking his word as gospel, treating him like royalty as soon as he flashed them his iconic smile. He’d come to learn that at a very young age, to put his looks and charm first. He had always been all that his whole life, praised for his looks and amazing people skills, things came easy. If he wanted a girl he’d get the girl, if he wanted something done, it’d surely get done. Most of the times he didn’t been want whatever he was asking for, it was just the act of being given something that felt so undeniably validating for him

He just expected this one to fall like all the other women in his life but she didn’t. He didn’t know what the hell he was doing wrong this time but it was frustrating, he had to actually try for something he wanted for once and damn he wanted her. 

He huffed as he slid the cut up veggies into a pot of ground beef which was simmering away.

When she talked back to him it hurt, it hurt a lot but that was a part of her appeal, he’d never had someone be so genuine with him. 

His mind fixated on it all as he cooked. A part of him felt spoiled, he’d had so much given just for his looks alone that he wasn’t used to struggling for something he wanted, it irritated him. Was that really all he was? Some dumb sexy man who could sweet talk his way out of trouble? He didn’t want that for himself, he wanted then that but in wanting more it only made him feel more spoiled. When would he finally feel satiated? 

He found himself on his neighbors doorstep, container of lasagna in hand. 

“Oh Tony you’re back!” The woman smiled, pushing back her pink locs as she leaned against the door frame. 

“Yeah yeah I know I can’t stay away Betty.” He shook his head and laughed before handing her the container of lasagna. “Here, I think it’s a fair trade for the cheese you gave earlier!” 

“Mmm I can’t wait!” She popped off the lid before using the fork he gave. She hummed as she took a bite before pausing. He couldn’t tell but it seemed as if this look of disgust washed over her face before she masked it with a smile. “Oh… wow Tony this is just amazing!?” She mumbled, mouth full as he starred in confusion. 

“Are you sure,” he asked timidly, playing with his hands. “It looks like you're trying not to puke.” She quickly shook her head at his words. 

“No I mean it, this is soooo good!” She mused, her smile wide as she took another bite. “So good Tony.” 

“Oh well if you say so, thanks doll.” She flustered just a bit at his words before nodding quickly. 

“Yeah of course, bring me more next time!” 

He watched as she closed the door, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion, that was so weird. 

He decided to just go to sleep, he didn’t even want to eat, his mind felt too crowded. The way Betty treated him only fueled his confusion more. He just felt lied to by everyone, like he was living it out so easy. He hated it but he had to know...

Did people really let him get away with anything he wanted, his subpar work, his stupidity just because of how he looked? Were people lying when they said he was the best at everything? And if so, if that was all true why didn't Josie do the same.

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

Jean was bobbing his head gently, one hand on the steering wheel as music filled the car, this other hand was absentmindedly playing with his blue tufts of hair. The roots were growing in, making a heavy contrast between the two colors, Josie found it rather charming though. She leaned back and hummed gently, a warm smile blanketing her features as she took in the air of it all. She lulled her head to the side to Jean, movements relaxed and unguarded. She loved being around Jean, he was just so comforting without trying, he was such a good friend. 

“Thanks again for driving me,” she hummed as she played with one of her curls. “I can’t wait to get my car back.” 

“I know, Jean Loo is happy too!” he playfully shoved her shoulder before patting his palm against the sterling wheel to the beat of the music. “Are you gonna keep walking to work orrr…?” He asked with a furrowed brow, she just shrugged in response, 

“I don’t know, I mean I wanted to at first but now I’m just, ehhh.” She sighed and glanced out the window, Tony appearing in her thoughts. She still didn’t know how she felt about the man, a part of her hated him while another part wanted to get to know him better. 

“Pourquoi?” 

“I can’t believe I haven’t told you,” she laughed and pinched her brow, shaking her head. “It’s like straight out of a novel, fucking crazy.” He looked at her with a bit of concern. 

“What is up Josie?” He asked softly, continuing with his drumming. 

“Y’know that apartment they’re building?” She asked.

“Uhh kinda? Why,” he hummed softly as the song got to the bridge. 

“Well there's this guy,” before she could continue he quickly spoke up. 

“Is he giving you trouble?” 

“What, no I-” She cleared her throat, “well kinda, not really. I don’t know how to feel yet Jean.” She shook her head and laughed. 

“Well what's he doing?” He questioned. 

“We talk every morning through the gate where he works, every time I talk to him I regret it but for some reason I keep going back.” She sighed softly, “but he’s such a dumbass you know? Stereotypical flirt, was probably in a varsity growing up, thinks he can get with whoever whenever, dumb as rocks.”  She bit her lip as she thought. “But to be honest, he's kinda funny.” Jeans drumming came to a halt. 

“You think he’s funny?” 

“Oh god I did say that huh?” She shook her head, “I mean when he isn't being all weird and flirty he's genuinely a funny guy, its cute.” 

“You just met and you already find him cute? Mon dieu!” Jean scoffed, only confusing her. 

“Well I mean yeah, can I not?” 

“I’m not saying you can’t, it is just uh kinda early for that, huh?” He mumbled out under his breath. 

“You make it sound like I’m getting married to him, Jean. We’re just talking.” She shook her head, a bit irritated by his attitude. If anyone was going to be happy about her talking to a guy figured it would be Jean. “Plus, I don’t think anything’ll happen. I find guys like him absolutely insufferable.” 

“Ahh okay then,” he cleared his throat. “Maybe cutting out morning walks to work would be a good idea then?” she shrugged and looked out the window. 

“Uhh… I don’t know.”

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

it was frigid, he could see his breath in the chilled air puff out into a white cloud. He had on some woolen work gloves and a Carhartt jacket pulled over which inside was lined with fleece. It seemed the rest of the men on sight were feeling it, all in scarves and sweaters, trying to persevere against the cold. He was awfully giddy though, he could only imagine the sight, Josie strolling over to the gate in a puffy sweater and a beanie, dressed to fight back the cold, she’d look absolutely darling. 

He really liked her and it was apparent to all the guys on site. He was thankful for his colleagues, they were like the best wingmen. They’d all band together to do Tony’s work while he spent his time talking to her only because of how happy the girl made him. They all saw him after Tina and since then he’d been so dull till she came around, his guys didn’t want that ending any time soon. 

So as he saw her approach the gate he fumbled, practically dropping his hammer before waving and running over, a huge grin on his lips. 

“Jo!” She laughed out, leaning against the gate as she slipped off her headphones. She has his dead pan look of annoyance on her face, he didn’t understand why she always looked at him like that, all he knew was that he wanted to fix it. “Hey dollface,” he hummed, fixing his hair as he struggled to compose himself. 

“Tony,” she cleared her throat and glanced to the side before half smiling, he hated how uninterested she seemed sometimes. “Hey, how are you?” 

“I’m alright,” he pushed back his hair and smiled, letting his eyes play as he admired her. “How about you?”

“Oh me? Real good mood actually!” She let her expression soften, smiling in a way that made his legs go weak. “I finally picked my car up yesterday, you won't believe how much I missed driving.” She rolled her eyes to the side, a smile wide on her lips. He could only hope to make her this happy one day. 

“That’s great toots!” He watched as she played with her curls, a habit he picked up on and one he began to absolutely adore. “Ahh, on the topic of things we did yesterday, I cooked!” He pulled out a container of lasagna which he sneakily hid behind his back. “Wanna try?” 

“Why not,” so he popped open the container, grabbing a fork before scooping a hearty amount for her. He felt so much care in this moment, here he was feeding her with food he made! 

“Here it’ll be a little weird,” he chuckled as he stuck the fork through the gate before putting it to her mouth. She just hummed and took a bite. Her smile quickly faded away though as her face contorted from one of pure disgust. She pulled away and coughed out, begrudgingly swallowing. 

“Tony that's like really salty!” She fished in her bag for her water bottle, “like unhealthy salty!”

“Oh,” he stood there loosely holding the fork in hand as she downed her bottle. Instead of feeling sad or guilty though a feeling of contentment washed through him, he smiled. 

Now he knew the answer to his question.

Chapter Text

It was yet another cold autumn morning. The breeze fluttered through an array of oranges and reds before gently placing them to the floor leaving leaves to crunch under Josie's boots. It was Friday, her last day till the weekend. She was pretty excited for the break since she had plans with Chance and Parker on Saturday and with Jean on Sunday. She found herself standing in front of the construction site's gate, hand stuffed in her pockets as Tony futilely tried to flirt with her. 

A part of her was beginning to like this, it felt like a routine coming up to talk to him every morning before work. As much as she hated it when Tony tried to charm her, a part of her found it a little admirable how determined he was to make her fall, she began to find it kind of cute. Not cute in a way that she was starting to fall for him though! No she’d never stoop that low, she had standards. 

“You’re still walkin” Tony hummed, crossing his arms as he watched her. “Thought your car was fixed.” 

“Ohhh it is,” she began, pushing up her glasses. “I just like walking, it makes me feel productive, plus with the gas prices now!” She laughed out and shook her head gently. 

“Right, gas.” His lips quirked into a crooked smile as he watched her, arms resting comfortably over his chest. “Sure you’re not walking cause you wanna talk to me?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” She scoffed, eyebrow raising. 

“If you started driving to work that means you wouldn’t be able to talk to me anymore,” he huffed gently. “I’m flattered you’re walking just for me,” he shot her this soft expression which was amped up to tease her. His hand rested on his heart as if he felt incredibly touched, “so romantic…” 

“Awww,” she hummed. “Someone knows what correlation is! Of course if I drove I wouldn't be talking to you anymore.” She rolled her eyes and chuckled at him under her breath. “And no I’m not walking for you, I’m walking cause I’m poor,” she emphasized the last word heavily. “I'll always be cheap before anything close to romantic.” 

“Jesus who hurt you doll!?” He laughed, shaking his head. “Seriously who hurt you, I’ll beat them up.” He quipped, dead serious making her giggle a bit. 

“God Ton relax.” 

“Ton!?” He asked, a smile teasing on his lips. 

“What?” She asked, this dazed expression washing over her features. 

“You called me Ton!” He laughed, biting his lip. “You made a nickname for me?!” He seemed too damn happy about the fact, cheeks tinging a little red as he tried to not act so giddy in front of her. 

“Oh come on, it just slipped out.” She huffed, finding his reaction rather ridiculous. 

“Okay but still that means you've been thinking about that nickname which only means-” he let out a gasp. “Have you been thinking about me!? God Josie how dirty…” She quickly shook her head 

“Ahh shut up! No I haven’t, I never think about you!” She protested, “For the record I hope you know I hate you, all of you!” he just stared with this little grin as she tried to defend herself. 

“Fine fine whatever you say,” he pouted gently before leaning against the gate. “But since you're calling me Ton now that means I get to call you Jo, that's only fair.” She just sighed, trying to get a grip on things. 

“I- ugh whatever,” she shot him that typical look of annoyance before nodding. “I permit you to call me Jo.” She mumbled begrudgingly, waving her hand off to the side.

“Aww alright then Jo,” he hummed with a sweet smile. 

“Yeah alright,” she sighed sarcastically, shaking her head gently. “It's adorable.”

“No, you’re adorable.”

She laughed and glanced away quickly, rubbing the side of her neck, a blush spread on her cheeks. That’s what really got her, his words. For once they didn’t feel planned out, calculated, like a half assed pick up line you could find online, they sounded genuine. This was the Tony she liked, one not hiding under layers and layers of charm and shallowness, she wanted to get this Tony more. 

“Ugh, shut up.” She mumbled dismissively.

She struggled to quell her blush, clearing her throat awkwardly as a sense of dread filled her stomach. It couldn’t be, she couldn’t be gaining feelings, not now, not for him. She wasn’t ready for a relationship, for anything. His words scared her, she couldn’t be in love, love never treated her well, she knew that. 

She pushed up her bag before stepping back. 

“Ohh shit look at the time, I gotta go!” She blurted before quickly walking away. 

“Wait what!? So soon!” He called out to her, she hated being distant like this but she needed to think. “Awhh come on Jo seriously? What did I do!” She walked a little faster till his words drowned out, pulling her headphones back on. 

This couldn’t be happening.

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

He stood there, watching as her figure slowly disappeared, his shoulders slumping. Things were going so good, they were flirting, being all playful then something happened. 

“Damnit,” he cursed out before huffing and going back to his work. He began to help another hammer in a beam, eyes glazed over as he thought. She made him feel like such a screw up sometimes, like he was stupid. Usually people just nodded and smiled as he talked but of course the girl he wanted had to break that pattern. 

He chewed on his lip absentmindedly, the sound of his hammer against wood filling the empty space. 

She was so complicated, so difficult. He did something right though, he knew that. When he called her adorable it got her blushing but he’d complimented her before and she’d usually just toss him an irritated glare. This time was different, he needed to figure it out so he could keep doing it over and over until she-

“Fuck!” He cursed out, wincing as he pulled his hand away.

“Shit are you okay?” One of his colleagues asked as he pulled off his work glove. He hit his hand with the hammer, luckily the glove took some of the blow but still that didn't keep his hand from searing with pain. He bit his lip gently, he hit his thumb which was bleeding a bit and starting to bruise.  

“Yeah no I’m fine,” he sighed and pushed back his hair, a bit irritated before pulling his glove back on. “Lets just get back to work yeah?” 

“I don’t know, that looks bad Tony,” the man began, voice lined with concern. “I think you should get that wrapped up, I’m pretty sure there's a med kit somewhere ove-” 

“I’m fine,” he said quickly before shooting the man his iconic smile. "Seriously, trust me bro.” He put on that firm yet charming voice that usually got people to listen.

“Alright then, just take it easy.” He sighed before walking away, leaving Tony alone. 

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

Third wheeling yet again, felt like a side job at this point. Both Chance and Parker drank whatever was on tap while she nursed her lemon drop martini. She wasn’t the type to go out drinking often but if that was what the boys wanted to do then she’d comply. Chance was playfully whispering something to Parker making him laugh out, to put it simply they were being couply like always. Josie just watched with a bored expression, taking the occasional sip of her drink. 

“Alone?” A voice from behind the bar called out to her, making her sit up. It was a woman with a sweet smile. She had long cascading locks of ginger and an inviting air. 

“No not alone,” Josie mumbled gently, smiling at the women. “Just uhmm unincluded. Not like I’d wanna be a part of that anyways.” She glanced over to Parker and Chance as they continued to do whatever the hell they were doing. 

“Ahh well then you have me, I’m Beverly!” She smiled sweetly and held a hand out for Josie to shake which she quickly shook. 

“It’s nice to meet you! I’m Josie!”

“Josie…” Beverly bit her lip at the name, “I swear to God I know your name from somewhere.” She sighed and shook her head gently making Josie raise her eyebrows. 

“You do?” Josie didn’t know many people so the fact that some random women recognized her only intrigued her. Beverly leaned against the table top before just shrugging. 

“I don’t know it's slipping my mind,” she sighed. “I’ll tell you if I do though!” She quipped before pushing back her hair. The two girls looked at Parker and Chance yet again, they were still immersed with one another, Josie cringed at the sight making Beverly laugh. “I can only assume you’re single.” 

“Well yeah single but,” Josie cleared her throat. 

“But?” Beverly teased with a grin, making Josie laugh and shake her head. She let her mind drift to Tony for a second, was she really willing to talk about it to some random person? She glanced at the boys, they seemed preoccupied enough and Josie had been missing some girl talk.

“Well there’s this guy,” she began, taking a sip of her drink as Beverly's smile only widened. 

“A guy!” She laughed and leaned in, resting her cheek in her palm. “Do tell!”

“Well It’s confusing!” She sighed and shook her head, “I can’t tell if I like him or not. Like every time we talk, I just stand there like what the hell am I doing but I keep going back.” She bit her lip softly. “He’s just so surface level you know? Like one of those guys who uses there pretty privilege and charm to get away with being fucking stupid! It’s so annoying!”

“I feel you, I hate guys like that.” Beverly hummed, moving to wash a cup to keep her hands busy.

“No cause I think he thinks he can get with me just cause he’s attractive.” It felt nice finally getting her feelings out there. “And it’s frustrating cause he leads with that but sometimes his actual personality slips though and I really like it.”

“Uh huh…” Beverly nodded, listening to her words. 

“Like yesterday he said something to me but it felt actually real, like it was genuine when he said it.” Her cheeks turned pink as she played back the moment in her mind. "I just wish he could be that open with me all the time.” She admitted, finishing off her drink. 

“I see, guys am I right?” She laughed and shook her head gently.

“I know! They’re so confusing!” Josie laughed out, playing with her curls absentmindedly. 

 “What’s happening?” Chance blurted, looking at the two girls. Currently Parker had his head nuzzled against his shoulder, the two finally paying attention. 

“Oh nothing,” Josie muttered, batting her hand to the side before humming as Beverly shot her a little smirk. 

“Awh alright,” Chance said softly, ruffling Parker's hair as he leaned against him.

The rest of the night was filled with conversation shared. The four seemed to get along rather well, honestly Beverly was a riot too. So the trio hung out till she had had to close up the bar, begrudgingly kicking them out. Chance and Parker were absolutely wasted meaning Josie would have to be tonight's designated driver. The men were in the car as Beverly stood leaning against the door frame, smiling as they exchanged numbers, planning on keeping in touch. 

“I swear I just know you, heard of you.” Beverly insisted, shaking her head as she thought to herself. “It’s just not clicking.”

“Funny,” Josie hummed and pushed her phone into her pocket, smiling gently. “Once you figure it out though I’d like to know,” she hummed. 

“Yeah course, I’ll keep you updated.” Beverly joked, rolling her eyes before sighing. “Night though, I’ll see you again hopefully?” Josie nodded at her words. 

“Oh totally, I’ll see you later. Goodnight.” Josie smiled and bid her goodbyes before walking off, secretly dreading having to drive the two drunken men home. 

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

The mid day light filled the apartment, a warm cup of coffee settled in his hands. He loved Rainey's place, it was like a second home, he always found himself here. Today it wasn’t as inviting though, Rainey was scolding him for leaving his hand untreated for so long. His finger was pretty bad, the nail slowly blackening over, the flesh bruised. As soon as Rainey saw the injury she tended to it, berating him with concern. 

Now he was settled in Rainey's living room as music from her record player filled the space. He took a long sip of his coffee as Rainey conversed with Beverly who happened to be there too. They were all a close knit trio, the two people Tony trusted the most. 

“So these two gay guys are all over each other," Beverly laughed, sipping her coffee. “And their friend is there and she seems somewhat annoyed so I’m like oh hey girl what's up and she just dumps about this guy!” She let out a long chuckle, “and the man sounds like a dick! Absolutely annoying!”

“Annoying how?” Rainey questioned, stirring her coffee, 

“She said he was what… shallow or whatever, I don’t know.” She took a long sip of her coffee. “I wasn’t really listening.” 

“Ahh sounds messy, poor girl.” Rainey shook her head gently. “On the topic of relationship issues, Tony, how are you and that girl?” A smile played on his lips, he’d been holding back on talking about her.

“Oh we’re doing great, you know me, easing it on.” He laughed and took a long sip of his coffee. “I swear she’s head over heels for me already,” he rolled his eyes and smirked. “I mean you guys would love her, I gotta find a way to bring her around someday.” he knew he was talking like they were already dating but he couldn’t help it. 

“Don’t you think you’re falling a little fast.” Rainey asked timidly, playing with one of her necklaces. 

“What, me? No!” He let out a long laugh, taking another sip of his coffee. “Come on, Rainey Jo is a dream. You’d like her if you met her.”

“Jo?” Beverly mumbled, eyebrows furrowing. 

“I’m not saying I wouldn’t like her, I'm saying I’m concerned Tony. You just stopped dating Tina, You fragile right now, needy. I don’t want your heart getting broken.” Rainey sighed, her concerns seemed to fly over his head though. 

“I don’t get why things always have to go back to Tina!” He groaned, sitting back. “I’m past that now, I’m past her! This is a new start.” 

“Jo…” Beverly bit her lip, sitting back before it all seemed to click. “Holy shit, Josie, Jo!” She let out a laugh. “Oh my god I talked to her last night!” Beverly rolled her eyes, shaking her head gently. “God that was nagging me all day today, I was just like who the hell is this woman, I knew I knew her name from somewhere. 

"Wait you know Josie!? That's great I-" and then Beverly's words finally hit him. 

Beverly laughed out at the revelation as Tony just sat there, his smile slowly fading away. Beverly said Josie called the man she was talking about last night shallow, annoying. Is that really what Josie thought of him? Thought he was some pathetic infuriating loser. His shoulders slumped as Rainey shot him a sympathetic smile, Beverly's laugh is slowly coming to an end. 

“Ahh shit I’m sorry,” Beverly mumbled out as Tony tried to shield his hurt. 

“No no It’s fine. It’s good to know how she actually feels.” He sighed before Beverly cleared her throat.

“Hey she said good things too though,” she creased her brow, trying to recall what Josie said. “Something about your personality, your true personality?” She sighed, “Fuck I can’t remember.” 

“Seriously Bev it’s fine, don’t sweat it.” He insisted making her shake her head. 

“No it’s on the tip of my tongue!”

“Tony honey,” Rainey began. “I think what Beverly is trying to say is that Josie likes you more when you're your real self, when you're genuine with her.” 

“What does that even mean, this is my real self!” Tony huffed, motioning to himself. 

“Tony…” She pinched her brow and shook her head, she didn’t know how to word this for him, how to help him. “You’ll figure it out.” Rainey gave him an encouraging smile before patting his knee. 

He just felt lost by Beverly's words, what did that even mean what Josie was trying to say to him. It only added to Josie's impossible self yet he knew somewhere in here was an answer. He just wanted her to feel for him what he felt for her. 

He just wanted her.

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

She was laying on the couch, a lazy expression on her face, head resting in Jean's lap as he played around with beats on his computer. Jean was finishing up the song he sent to Josie a couple days ago, adding some finishing touches. She looked up at Jean with a content expression, he looked so focused, she found it rather funny. 

They were pretty close friends but they didn’t seem to mind. Their friendship was hitting its three year mark and honestly she couldn’t imagine her life without him. She still remembered the day they met, he’d been working at Valdivian a little longer than her so when she got hired, she’d pop her head from her cubicle over to his, asking for advice. After that they kind of just hit it off, hanging out practically every day after work and during. 

She let out a yawn and pushed up her glasses.  

“I went to the bar yesterday with Parker and Chance.” She mumbled out softly as he glanced down at her. 

“Yeah? Let Jean Loo guess, all over one another again, oui?” He mused, making her laugh out gently. 

“Exactly!” She hummed and looked to his lap top, her eyebrows furrowing. “How's it going.”

“Ehh alright, I added another verse last night.” He admitted making her smile wide in excitement. 

“Ohhhh share please!” She laughed, making him roll his eyes.

“Okay okay fine then, get off me. Se dépêche!” He pushed her away playfully before resting his laptop in his lap, clearing his throat. 

She leaned back and listened as he began to play the track. Most of it was what she remembered from last time before it got to the new verse. The words were odd, almost intimate. She couldn't help but furrow her eyebrows as affection and infatuation seemed to be weaved between the words he’d written. The suggestion of a crush could be read in the lines intriguing her. As the song came to an end a cheeky smile played on her lips as Jean glanced away, a bit embarrassed, 

“Ohhhh!” She laughed, shoving his shoulder softly. “You have a crushhhh!” She teased making Jean's cheeks flush up a soft red. 

“Ughh ta gueule!” He tried to brush off how humiliated he was. “Don’t tease, Jean Loo is being vulnerable!" He insisted, making Josie calm down a bit. 

“Okay okay sorry,” she brought her leg to her chest, resting her chin on her knees. “But you have a crush, that’s cute! Why didn’t you tell me?” she cooed. 

“It’s embarrassing,” he murmured softly. “You'd poke fun, break my heart.” 

“I would never make fun of you!” she sighed, shaking her head. “I mean who do you think I am.” He glanced at her and shrugged. “Who is it?” 

“Not important,” he bit his bottom lip, making her shove him lightly. “Josie!” 

“How could this ever be considered as not important Jean!” she frowned, “telll meeeee!” she begged, “please? Oh please please?! s'il vous plaît, s'il vous plaît!” She giggled out, making him groan. 

“Mon dieu, your accent is horrible.” He’d recently been teaching her some French and it was not going well. 

“I think that says a lot about you as a teacher.”

“Oh stop!” He rolled his eyes and frowned, letting his voice drop to a more serious tone. “I mean it though, don’t push Josie. I’ll tell you when I’m ready.” She sighed and frowned. 

“Ughh so secretive, fine. Be like that Jean,” she pouted gently before resting her head against his shoulder.

“I will be like that, It’s just not time.” He sighed and shook his head. “You'll find out one day.”

Chapter Text

The smell of bleach seemed to fill the air as Josie found herself settled in a salon chair. Her bangs were growing out to a point where they’d touch her lashes so she figured it was finally time for a good trim.

She happened to frequent this salon for one reason and one reason only, Scandalabra. He was a loud flamboyant man, a true big mouth constantly in the now on the latest drama. He was fun to listen to while getting her hair done, like her own personal podcast. 

She sat up as he came over, he pulled the barber's gown over her with a confident smile. He peddled up the chair so she’d be sat higher as he cut her hair.

“Sooo!” He called out dramatically, resting against her shoulders as she stared in the mirror. “What are we doing?”

“Ahh, I was considering just a trimming, maybe something for the ends and my bangs?” She hummed, combing her fingers through her loose auburn hair. 

“Just a trim!” He called out with feigning shock as if she’d just committed a travesty, “honey you don’t come to me for just a trim!” He emphasized, pushing back her hair.

“I know I know sorry, I get it, you’re an artist the sheers are your brush blah blahh,” she huffed and slouched just a bit. “But I can’t really afford anything crazy right now,” she admitted, “after the whole car breaking down thing I’ve been strapped on cash Scandy.” God she hated thinking about her car, that repair was horribly expensive. For the past couple of days she’d been living off cups of noodles and chips. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled out, moving to adjust her glasses.

“Oh Josie,” he squeezed her shoulders reassuringly. “You forget we’re friends, plus I want to do you a favor.” He bursted his words out, pulling away and resting his hand over his heart, making a bit of a scene. “For I’m helping you find love!” 

She turned horribly red at his words, confusion washing over her face like a tsunami. She coughed loudly and glanced around the salon before letting out an anxious laugh. 

“Uhm I don’t understand what you’re talking about!” She insisted as he pulled down to rest his chin against the salon chair.

“Awh come on, you really thought you could keep this from me? Hmmm?” He cooed, making her fluster up. 

“I don’t know what you’re referring to,” she mumbled, shaking her head quickly. 

“So we’re playing coy!? Josie you’re breaking my heart, if you were to tell anyone I thought it’d be me.”

“Tell anyone what!” She huffed, embarrassed and a bit frustrated. “You’re confusing me!” 

“Just shush okay, sit back and let me do my work. Free of charge,” he called out as he quickly walked away to grab supplies. 

“Scandy wait I-”

So that’s how she found herself sitting in a salon chair for much longer than she expected as Scandaclabra did his work, pasting dye against her auburn strands, wrapping it in foil. She didn’t really know what he was doing but she trusted him, Scandaclabra could do wonders with hair and of course this was free so she wasn’t going to complain. 

“I must say Josie I’m shocked, I mean you, talking to a man?” He laughed and painted some more dye into her hair, eyebrows raised. “How scandalous~!”

“I really don’t know what you mean,” she whispered. There was no way he could be talking about Tony. She’d only told one person, that person being Jean. He was Scandalabra though, the man had his ways, she shook her head and sighed. “Unless you're talking about,” she let her words trail off as she glanced up at him. All she could see was the most gleeful grin tugging on the man's lips. 

“Exactly, that!” He laughed before giving her a sly look. “So tell, divulge!” He was making it sound like some romantic rendezvous which it was far from.

“Wait, I wanna know how much you know first?” 

“Ahh well,” he hummed as he wrapped some of her hair. “Jean told me you told him you were talking to a man every day before work. Apparently you found him cute, you’re incredibly infatuated with him I’d assume, hmmm?” He questioned making her groan, moving to pinch her brow. She didn’t tell Jean not to tell anyone cause she figured he wouldn’t.

“What no! I’m not infatuated with anyone!” She insisted, “Jean told you this when?” she cursed out softly under her breath with feigning irritation. 

“His last appointment of course, the man has to keep his blue.” Right, Jean's obnoxiously blue hair, his pride and joy. Josie never had anything against his hair; she just couldn’t believe the office let him keep it somedays. “He sounded upset,” he hummed, making her raise a brow. 

“Upset how?” 

“Like annoyed, a bit down,” he began. “Had this little frown on his lips as he talked about it as if he didn’t want you liking anyone. Interesting huh?” 

She didn’t get why he was acting like this. Jean had never liked anyone while they were friends but if he did she’d be ecstatic, she didn’t understand why he struggled to hold that same air with her. Whatever it was he had to cut it out, she didn’t like being held down like this. He was supposed to be her best friend, supposed to be supportive, not rude and conceded as soon as she was happy about something that didn’t involve him. She let out a long groan, sitting back in the chair. 

At least she didn’t give Jean a name. Tony was a pretty common name but if Scadalabra had his hands on it he’d almost immediately find the man. 

“Jean,” she sighed and shook her head gently. “I never said I liked him or anything, just said the guy was funny.” She rolled her eyes. “He’s just so protective sometimes, you know? Must be like a brotherly instinct, we’re practically siblings anyways.” 

“Right, siblings.” He muttered out with this condescending yet playful tone making Josie raise her eyes. 

“Uhh yeah, siblings. Do you not agree or something?” She questioned.

“No no I totally agree,” he ran his fingers through one of her curls before pasting it with dye. “But does he?” 

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

“My true personality,” Tony stared in the mirror, brow knit in confusion as he tried to dissect Beverly and Rainey’s words. This was his true personality, his default, how could he be anything other than this? He pushed back his hair and groaned softly, what the hell could she want? He was willing to change himself if that was really what had to happen.

He just wanted Josie to like him, even if that meant finding out what his “true” personality was. 

His phone buzzed, interrupting his train of thought before checking. It was that guy again, Mr. French man with the broken toilets. This guy lived in a shitty old apartment with an even shittier toilet which always broke down. Tony did handy man work on the side to make a quick buck and honestly this man was an easy stream of cash. 

Did Tony really know what he was doing when he fixed the guys toilet? No, he kind of just made it up as he went and if the guy ever questioned him too much, he’d just sweet talk his way out of it like always. 

He went to pack his supplies before pulling himself in his car, a begrudging expression on his face. 

As he entered the home the man was leaning against his kitchen counter, playing with his brightly dyed blue hair with a bored expression on his face. 

“Ahh it took you long enough, Jean Loo was waiting oh so patiently.” He rolled his eyes and glanced to the side, this guy always gave him a bit of attitude. 

“Right Jean,” Tony sighed and rolled his eyes, adjusting his tool belt. “Broken toilet again?” He hummed as the Frenchman brought him to the restroom. 

“Yes, it has broken yet again! Toilet merdique,” he mumbled that last part under his breath before leaning against the door frame. “It’s this apartment, gives Jean Loo such problems. He is losing hair from stress!” 

“Yeah the apartment, of course.” Tony glanced down at the porcelain bowl which was flooding water, “sure it’s not cause of your incontinence?"

“I do not have incontinence, I keep telling you this!” He shouted defensively, cheeks flaring up red. 

“Yeah? I’m startin to believe otherwise.” Jean was hilarious, got frustrated so easily sometimes. 

“Oh ho ho! You think you are such a clever Américain! You love irritating Jean Loo, huh?” He sneered and crossed his arm just like a child would. “You are insufferable,” he huffed and looked away. 

“Yeah yeah keep sayin that, remember who's fixin your toilet.” Tony laughed before crouching down, assessing the situation.

As he did his thing he could sense Jean trying to walk off making him quickly spin around to look at the man. 

“Woah hey, hang out with me!” He hummed, setting up his tools. 

“And why would I do that?” 

“Come on I’ve been here like, what, 10 times? Talk to meee! We can get to know each other!" Tony was a social butterfly at heart, he loved the idea of getting to know someone new, even someone as stubborn as Jean. “Go sit,” He gestured to the sink before starting to inspect the toilet. Jean just sighed and reluctantly sat on top of the sink counter. 

“What should we talk about then?” Jean hummed, leaning his back against the wall.

“Hmm,” Tony chewed on his lip as he worked. “What brings a French guy like you to America? New York specifically?” 

“Ehh, it is a long story,” he batted his hand softly. “But I suppose something called me here y’know? My whole life I’ve loved rap, I wanted to be a rapper, I also like fish!” He laughed and shook his head. “So the plan was to go to college for marine biology while immersing myself into the rap culture out here. Jean Loo realized though that collage is hard and expensive. He cannot afford that.” He just shrugged, a look of regret on his face. 

“Jesus I’m sorry,” Tony frowned and gave him a sympathetic look. “But I get it, money is hard out here.” 

“What about you!” Jean began, a small smile tugging on his lips. “What is your story? How did you become some handy man fixing toilets?” 

“Okay one,” Tony laughed. “I’m more than just a handy man, I work on a construction site too. This is just a side gig.” He huffed as he ducked to the side of the toilet, looking around. “And secondly it’s a very embarrassing story! Very long too!” 

“Well we have all the time,” Jean rested his chin against his knees. “Talk away, you have my permission.” 

“Fine,” Tony sighed and shook his head, his mind racing back to Tina, to everything really. “It started about 6 years ago. I had this friend, one of those swingers.” He laughed, trying to mask the flush coming up on his cheeks. “And this guy is dating this girl named Tina and they want me to be their third or whatever, so of course I’m like yes.”

“Mon dieu! Un ménage à trois!?” Jean laughed out. 

“I don’t understand a thing you said but… sure.” Tony laughed awkwardly, "anyways so I become their third but this Tina girl, she’s just somethin else y’know? Like she’s an absolute babe, and she's like,” Tony blushed a little harder. “I mean she pushed me around and I’m into that sometimes. Keyword sometimes!” Jean continued laughing. 

“Okay?” He giggled, playing with his hair. 

“So over time it becomes more of a couple than a throuple. It’s just me and Tina and God I’m head over heels, like I wanna have a family, settle down!” Tony laughed, “She was the girl for me but things got weird.” 

His breath hitched, he didn’t like talking about Tima, how things got between them. 

“She was always really into reality TV when I met her and she’d surprisingly been on a couple of shows. Nothing big though!” He shook his head, “until of course she gets me on. Next thing I know I’m on dating show after datin show with her and our relationship is reduced to nothin but drama! It’s like she lives for the camera!” 

“Ahh I knew I knew your face!” Jean called out, “you were on triangle love island huh!? God you’re girl is horrifying, sexy but horrifying!” Tony couldn't help but let out a little humiliated chuckle, he hated when people recognized him. He already got enough shit from his co-workers. 

“I know, horrifyin. Anyways one day Tina comes to me all upset right? Apparently in this one show the fans liked me more than her and she just won’t have it!” He groaned, “so we’re shoutin and yellin and I say I’m leavin but truthfully Jean… I never leave.” He glanced up at him and sighed. “It’s been like this for five years now, we break up for like a week or so, one of us misses the other too much and we get back together, go on tv again, humiliate ourselves.”

“That’s, wow.” Jean frowned softly as he continued.  

“I know, recently I made boundaries, right? The Reality TV crap is a hard no and we haven't dated for over 2 months” He smiled gently. “There’s a part of me that misses her though. I don’t know if it’s the attention I want or the money from the shows, I just want somethin.” He sucked in his breath, looking away. “I really miss her.” 

“Tony, that’s heavy,” Jean bit his lip gingerly. “But that is okay! Jean understands what it is like to have something you cannot have, yes? It is heart wrenching.”

There was a long silence in the bathroom before Tony quickly lightened the mood, cracking some joke before the two continued talking about something else. He never expected to like the guy so much but they actually happened to have a lot in common, jean was a very pleasant man and Tony planned on keeping him around. 

So he stayed over a bit longer than expected, both men ended up hanging out in Jean's kitchen as the conversation switched to his rapping career. 

“I can’t believe you’re Lil’crapper!” Tony laughed out as Jean showed him some beats he was working on. After Josie had shown him the guy's account that one day he found himself listening to his music. Now here he was in the artist's apartment, feeling a little stupid for not putting two and two together. I mean how many French rappers are there in New York anyways?

“I’m shocked you know my stuff!” Jean laughed, resting his chin in the palm of his hands as Tony scrolled through on the laptop. 

“Yeah course I do,” he hummed. 

“Can Jean Loo ask how, he is curious?” 

“Oh just this girl,” Tony rolled his eyes, his mind drifting to Josie. God, any thought of that girl got his heart racing. “Josie, she said she was friends with this Lil’crapper guy then showed me your music!” 

“Ahh you know Josie!” A long laugh escaped Jean's lips, his smile apparent. “Josie is the best, qui? I’ve known her for so long now. She’s amazing.” He hummed sweetly. 

“Oh course, she's a doll!” Tony agreed, his smile softening at the thought of her. 

The smile which settled upon their lips was infectious, it felt nice having another friend, especially one who was also friends with Josie. A part of him beamed, he could definitely use Jean to get just the tiniest bit closer to Josie if he wished. 

The rest of the night was filled with laughter and conversation, something good was going to come from this, he knew it. 

Chapter Text

“Happy birthday to you!” The office erupted in cheers and laughs as he blew out the candles, confetti thrown into the air. Josie sat back with a gentle smile, hands rested against the back of the chair Jean was sat in as cake was cut. 

“Yayy je suis anniversaire!” She giggled, resting her chin against her palm yet Jean shot her an almost offended glare. 

“I am birthday?” He translated, raising a brow “Josie, that's incorrect.” 

“What?” she glanced away, pushing up her glasses. “Me, incorrect!?” she scoffed, “Never, you clearly don’t know French.” 

As cake was passed around the two exchanged each other a sly grin before slipping out of the office floor, two slices of cake in hand. As steps echoed the empty stairwell they couldn’t help but laugh until of course they made it, the roof of Valdivians office space. 

“I can’t believe we’re ditching your party!” She laughed as they found a ledge to sit upon. As she glanced down below it was just nothing but street, everyone looked as if they were little ants and she could feel the cold air hitting her face. Jean loved it up here while she was more partial to staying inside. 

“It is Jean Loo’s birthday,” he poked at his cake with his fork, a lazy yet content expression on his face. “He can do whatever he wants,” he half smiled at Josie before glancing away and getting back to eating his cake. 

This air settled between them, one of ease. Ever since she met Jean she’d felt a sense of security within him matched by no other, well almost matched by no other. Of course her mind drifted to him, the stupid idiotic construction worker, Tony. It wasn’t like he produced the same feelings Jean did, it was close yet completely different and new altogether. 

“How is he?” Jean's words sliced through the once comfortable moment like a knife. She hated whenever he brought this up, still after all this time he absolutely detested the thought of her talking to Tony, he didn’t even know him, didn’t even know his name. 

“Oh,” she cleared her throat and leaned back, absentmindedly playing with one of her curls. “It’s going fine,” she hummed and took a slow bite of her cake as he watched her. “We still just talk through the gate, nothing more,” she huffed. “For some reason things just feel so… I don’t know.”

“What do you mean?” He furrowed his eyebrows and glanced at her, concerned etching on his face. “Come on it’s been three months, things should be going much more then, ‘just okay.’” Three months, Jesus. They’d been talking for awhile now and she didn’t know how to feel about it all. Hell, that first week was great, he’d flirt with her and she’d get all frustrated but now she felt so lost. It felt as if right when she began wanting him, he’d already moved on. Tony was a lot less flirty now, they almost felt like just friends. 

“I really don’t know, okay Jean,” she shook her head lightly, “I don’t want to talk about that.” And as her words left her lips instead of Jean comforting her or helping her within her confusions, nothing but a small smile graced his lips. 

“Yeah, alright.” He cleared her throat and took a second to let his eyes rack her face, searching for an expression, a clue. “Jean Loo won’t prod.” 

“Thanks Jean, you’re the best.” 

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

Winter swept in faster than anyone expected, the unforgiving freeze hitting the construction site yet they worked nonetheless. Tony was bundled up, from fluffy socks to mittens, bulky winter coat to fuzzy cap, he was never good with the cold. Here he stood near the gate, coffee in hand as Josie rambled about her life yet his eyes seemed to gloss over, looking at the area around her rather than at her. 

“Are you listening Ton?” She questioned, eyebrows furrowing, cheeks flushed a soft pink from the cold or most likely from him. He just awkwardly cleared his throat, gaze meeting hers. 

“Huh, yeah uhm, yeah I am,” he mumbled, his eyes tracing her face. This hint of hurt etched her features as soon as she noticed he wasn’t really listening to her and it elicited a bit of guilt from him. “Shit Jo, I'm sorry,” he huffed. 

“No, no it’s fine,” an uncomfortable silence fell and he could only look at her with disdain. 

Why were they like this?

It was like all that energy he felt before vanished. It wasn’t like she got dull, he still thought she was hilarious and he found her beautiful but it was like he didn’t have the energy to like her the same way he once did. He felt horrible for all of it cause he was losing this, the presence and care she brought was slowly fading at each weak half assed response he granted. 

He was burning the candle of which was her at both ends, all the energy he’d thrown into making her swoon paying out futilely for he was too exhausted to even meet her with a fraction of care he used to give her now. They weren't even dating yet, that was the most painful part. 

His eyes darted over her figure before he mumbled out, 

“Oh yeah also we’re movin sites.” His words were nonchalant, as if he was telling the time yet she felt nothing but worried. 

“What?” She coughed out, eyebrows furrowing at his words. “You’re moving!”

“Well I wouldn’t say movin,” he laughed nervously, looking off to the side before sipping his coffee. “It’s just 15 minutes, the only difference is that I won’t be on your way to work.” He hated that look on her face, one of hurt. 

“So we won’t hang out in the mornings anymore?” She asked, spoken in a way he could only describe as fragile. Like if he said too much it would break and release something much more. He just shrugged before meeting her question with a nod. “Oh, alright,” she cleared her throat, “and when is this happening?”

“Im switchin like next wee-”

“And you didn’t tell me this?” She gave him this look, one he had a hard time reading, one of loss, like when you’re unable to stop a moving force. “You could've at least given me a heads up or something Ton.”

“No need to get upset,” he let out a shallow laugh, “I’m still so close, plus it slipped my mind.” 

“Slipped your mind?” she scoffed, “you weren't thinking about the fact your schedule would completely change Ton!” she seemed offended, he didn’t really get why though. “It’s like our conversations don’t mean anything to you anymore.” 

“Whattt!” He laughed dismissively, batting his hand away as she just stared. “Of course I care about you Jo, What?” He laughed before leaning against the gate, his one common playful attitude shining through for a second. “We’ll keep in touch, I promise, 15 minutes is nothing.” And with that he shot her the softest little smile making her worried expression melt away. 

“Okay then,” she sighed, pushing up her glasses. “I trust you Ton,” that voice he loved when she did that. Like her very words alone could coddle him close and leave all his worries at bay. The way she could neutralize him so quickly, it was crazy to him

“Yeah?” he questioned, head tilting lightly to the side. 

“Yeah.” 

“I’ll keep my word then.” 

And with that she gave him a soft smile, he returned hers with a more tight lipped one. She sighed and walked off leaving him like always alone. 

‧₊˚ ⋅ ☕︎ 𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅

Heavy.

Heavy, the feeling within her heart was heavy, painfully so. She didn’t know how to deal with it all, this feeling that resembled almost rejection yet she didn’t feel rejected. So as she sat in one of the stalls, tissue settled against her eyes as she tried to stifle her tears she couldn't help but feel conflicted. In her heart she didn’t believe Tony was letting her go, giving up on her but God her mind screamed it and today only proved her thoughts more. 

Their conversation was so quick this morning, two minutes at most, a majority of that time being filled with silence. He was so quick with her today, like he didn’t care about what she had to say. Worst of all, she was leaving and he didn’t even tell her, like he didn't have the time of day to tell her. 

But she wanted to be worth it, every fiber of her wanted to be worth his time like she once was. Before when he used to care for her, used to give a damn but now something changed. She didn’t know what it was but God it consumed her. 

Everyday she felt inadequate, pouring your time into something that gives nothing back was one of the most painful feelings and she was feeling it every time their eyes met. With him she was chasing the wind, trying to grasp something unattainable, lacking the properties to hold. 

She sniffled, trying to not smudge her make up. 

“Fuck,” she muttered, her throat clenching. She took a moment to breathe, regain herself before shakily sitting up, walking out the stall, head hung low. She looked into the mirror in front of her, sighing gently. She looked like a mess, a horrible pathetic mess. 

“Are you good Josie!” He couldn't help but smile gently as Jean called out to her. “Jean Loo saw you run out to the restroom once you got here and he felt worried!” She rolled her eyes gently at his words. 

“I’m fine!” She called, quickly fixing her face before clearing her throat. “Just give me a minute, yeah?” 

“Okay! Jean will wait oh so patiently.” He hummed, “le plus patient.”

After some time she walked out, the remnants of tears hidden under dabbed tears and makeup, a slight yet far from genuine smile settled upon her lips as she walked up to Jean. She needed comfort, she knew that and he always gave the best attention so as much as she tried to hide the fact that she was crying he still saw it on her. 

“What’s wrong?” He furrowed his brow, looking down at her, the remnants of tears apparent. 

“Nothing,” she muttered lightly. 

“No seriously, what's wrong?” He nudged her shoulder gently, trying to make something change, a smile, maybe a laugh, anything. 

“I-” She bit her lip, thinking carefully over how she should phrase her words. She didn’t want him to start worrying about her. “Let’s hang out after work, yeah?” She asked, tilting her head, He seemed almost confused by how she was acting yet he quickly loosened up, smiling at her. 

“Alright then,” he rested his hand on her shoulder, giving it a squeeze before they walked off to their respective cubicles. 

The remainder of the day was a drag, she could only reap so much entertainment from punching in numbers and typing up papers. He mind stayed on after work, how she’d tell Jean about Tony without getting any “I told you so’s,” or, “you should’ve listened to me’s.” 

She hated that this was even a conversation that would arise, it made her heart ache a little bit but she had to get this off her chest, had to tell someone. 

As soon as she sat down on her creaky office chair and settled her hands on her keyboard it was almost instantaneously she found herself at the bar with Jean. Within the blink of an eye she was here, everything prior blurred, like her day was a snapshot rather than cohesive. 

Within her hand sat a pint of beer, sure she wasn’t one to drink but tonight she needed to help with the edge. Jean sat next to her, chin resting in the palm of his hand, he wasn’t as drunk but tipsy none the less. The atmosphere was nice, inviting and she recognized Beverly working behind the bar, granting the women a smile and wave before bringing her attention back to Jean. 

Her voice was low as she vented her frustrations out to Jean about the whole situation. She never named Tony, it didn’t feel right for some odd reason yet she described it all to him in great detail. 

“Hmm,” Jean glanced over at her, eyes lidded as he took a sip from his drink. “je suis désolé,” he mused, a frown playing on his lips, “It’s unfair, you getting your heart played with like that Josie.” 

She sighed at his words, pushing up her glasses before tracing the rim of the cup set in front of her with her fingertip. 

“No,” she hummed, clearing her throat before taking a sip. “My heart was never being ‘played with’ Jean,” she sighed, “I must’ve read the room wrong. That’s my fault and my fault alone.” Their eyes met for a second, he had this expression of worry which was beyond her but she hated whenever it settled on his face. 

“Jean Loo doesn't understand,” he said bluntly. It hurt a little bit because he knew he wouldn’t get it, he couldn’t. This was for her to go through, to figure out. “Tu es fatigué?” He mused, his words made more like a statement rather than a question. She took a second to think, mind slowly translating his words before nodding. 

“oui,” she laughed before taking another sip of her drink. She hadn’t realized it till he pointed it out, her shoulders slouched, her eyes lidded, breaths becoming heavy yawns. As she slumped he couldn’t help but notice his eyes softening, her eyebrows furrowed at his gaze. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” She laughed, smiling up at him. He just shook his head dismissively, batting his hand off to the side. 

“It’s nothing,” he hummed, smiling cheekily.

“Oh come on I know you Jean!” She giggled, “that look doesn't mean ‘nothing’!”

“It’s nothing, I swear,” he insisted before standing up, stretching and pulling his coat on. “How about we get going?” 

“Going where?” She questioned, standing as well. 

“My place, yours,” he hummed. “Anywhere we want to go. I just don’t want you alone, not in this state.” 

She wanted to protest, argue that she would be fine on her own but deep down a part of her didn’t want to be left. With that she nodded gingerly, giving him a knowing glance, not admitting that she wanted to be near someone tonight but with enough care for him to know she’d like to be seen. 

She wasn’t wasted but she was inebriated enough to stumble around as they walked to his car, to laugh at random things and ramble loudly. He just listened and supported like always, letting her hang on his arm as they took the stairs up to his apartment, responding to her words with soft hums and nods.

That apartment had always been a second home to her, she knew where just about everything was, from where the dishware to the dirty laundry lived. She’d always found herself here to the point where her things combined with his, her clothes having its own personal spot in his drawer, her favorite snacks always stocked in his pantry. In essence she knew this place like the back of her hand. 

As she stumbled within his home, the smell of drinks distinct on her tongue, she felt almost loved by the support he provided. Of course she always felt loved by him but tonight was unlike any other. Perhaps it was the way he looked at her, talked to her, him being there as a whole. She was under his watch and of course she was always under his watch but today it felt as if his watch had increased and she thrived under that attention. 

They settled themselves on his stiff mattress in one another's arms, nothing but the sound of rain hitting the roof and their breathing between them. They were close, for them this was normal, holding one another. They’d done it plenty of times and to her she saw it as nothing but friendly. Nonetheless she liked the affection and sometimes as she was being held she’d let her mind wander. What if she was being held just like this but in another context, by another man in a romantic way, one who loved her. The thought alone was enough to make her blush. 

As he raked his fingers through her auburn curls, mumbling something she couldn’t quite make out she reveled in the admiration being levied against her, how open he was with her. 

“Jean,” her voice was still, almost a whisper, barely made out over the drumming of rainfall. She wanted to say something, he deserved it, a word of appreciation, a thanks for just being him. 

“Hmm?” He mumbled, a yawn escaping his lips. 

She thought, her mind racing as her hands traced circles into his shoulder. What did she want to say? As if there was anything to say, anything she could say to express how much she appreciated him. A low huff of frustration leaked out as she tried to form her words before lightly shaking her head. 

“Never mind,” she sighed. He shrugged and responded with a faint mumble before shifting to the side, eyes already fastened shut. With that she shut her eyes too, there was no use in trying to talk anymore, her actions were all the regard he needed. 

The pitter patter of the rain silenced everything, her mind shut off like a light switch, Tony slowly becoming background noise to her already loud life. For once in a very long time she felt cared for, like how she did before Tony came into her life. Before he made himself a spot in her mind everyday was like this with Jean, filled with affections and care but now with Tony here her mind was like a battle ground. She was confused at almost every turn, tonight though she could tune it all out, be held and hold someone back. Tonight she could forget about the world outside this room, forget about Tony and the things he made her feel for tonight she felt home. 

Jean felt like home.