Chapter Text
LEO
Today was going okay.
(If okay meant I was dying on the inside)
I was in the engine room, as per usual, doing my repairs that never seem to repair. Occasionally making an upgrade so the ship goes faster and/or smoother.
Talking to festsus sometimes when I have the few moments to do so.
I didn't even realize I missed breakfast.
Well, it's not like that was new news though.
I always skip put on meals.
Usually, I would put the food in a napkin and on my toolbelt to throw away later, it always made me feel bad that im wasting food.
But I don't deserve the food either.
Never have and never will.
Voices spiral in my head.
They always do.
Why do you even try anymore?
Piper probably doesn't even care about you.
You deserve all the hatred towards you.
You know it.
You should just die you bitch.
Your not even a real boy.
It's pathetic.
Your pathetic.
A wannabe boy.
A whore.
A slut.
No wonder you were abused.
You deserved all the pain and suffering that was brought to you.
You know it.
You should just kill yourself, then you will get to the fields of punishment.
Be tortured.
You deserve that.
Flashbacks to back then flash in my mind.
The horror, the hands on me, the knife and gun. The scars, the cigarettes, the smell of blood and drugs. The starvation.
The foster homes.
You will never deserve love.
And you know it.
A knock on the door is heard.
I get up - i mean - down from my spot near the ceiling, making sure im smiling and bright as I open the door to...
Piper.
"Hey leo, it's lunch. Come on, let's go eat." She says, reaching out to me.
I flinch, not enough that she notices so it's all good i guess.
She grabs my hand, pulling me to the mess hall where I will have act okay again.
But I always have.
So what's the difference anyways?
As I walk into the room eyes are set on me.
Why? How the hell would I know....
I must look filthy!
I must smell bad to...
They probably hate that im here, why did piper have to bring me here. It's not like I'm eating anything anyways.
"Hey leo! How are you doing?" Jason greeted happily, smiling at me with his blue eyes.
I smile, making sure I look like the jokester. instead if the quiet loner who would rather be in the dark with some pipes clears right now. "HI Jason! I'm doing great! Never been better!"
More like never been worse.
Hahaha, can't say that infront if them though.
Would cause them to ask questions or look at me the wrong way. In that worried and confused way.
Can't have that happening.
Annabeth looks up from her blueprint or scroll she has.
She's a workaholic like me, so she understands that I just work and work right?
(Enough for me to forget the things to actually survive.)
But her eyes show otherwise, she looks me up and down. Eyes hinting with something I don't understand yet, pity? Anger? Concern? Bitter? I don't know, it's so unreadable to me.
She sighs, looking me in the eyes, I aim my eyes at her hair instead. I always hated eye contact.
The foster homes were not nice about that...
"Leo, when was the last time you ate something? Or slept?"
It was a simple question.
But it was a question that I have much trouble answering.
I glance to the left at the calender,we keep it there so all of us know the date. It gets hard to keep track when your on a quest, in a warship, about to die at every turn.
...
It's thrusday.
It's been 3 days since I ate and slept.
Well, I haven't slept in a week actually.
But it's not that bad though!
I have gone longer and don't need sleep!
And hunger doesn't bother me, sure it hurts sometimes but then it fades.
So it doesn't matter.
I'm not dieing.
I just don't feel hungry,and besides, eating makes me sick. Causing me to throw it up anyways.
(Sometimes I just force myself to throw it up.)
I look at the calender, hoping the longer I glance at it the date will change so my answer sounds good.
I sigh, looking towards Annabeth again. "I ate yesterday-"
"No you haven't, don't lie to us leo." Jason scolds. Looking at me with sincere eyes.
Annabeth and piper nod in agreement. "Yeah leo, we haven't seen you even leave the engine room since the other day ago, and you most certainly have not eaten."
I stay silent for 2 seconds, 2 seconds to long, "I have, I have some food stashed in the engine room. Just incase there are to many repairs, ones that I can't leave from to actually leave the room."
I hope the lie is good enough.
Maybe I should have a fake stash of food just incase they check or visit me sometime in the engine room.
...nahhh, they never go in there unless it was to get me to socialize, breath air, and eat and drink something (or at least try to).
Not the energy drinks that (not really) helps me stay awake.
They look for any traces of me lieing before nodding.
Good they believed me.
"Oh okay, well, how have your repairs been going?" She asks me with a intense stare.
Dies she not believe me? Is that what the stare is for?
I smile wider, even as it brings pain to my face. Every smile cuts like a stab. "I still have some repairs to do, I should actually get back. Before sometimes bad happens, I will eat something though! But I really should get back to work..." I exclaim, leaving before they can even dare to protest I'm out, waving my hand in goodbye as I retreat back into the engine room.
My only safe place on the Argo 2.
The one place where i can be alone to rot.
Where I can think and not have to fake.
But is it really faking if it's all I know now?
...
I don't know...
...
Whatever.
It's time to get back to work.
PIPER
I sit down in defeat, looking at my plate.
I was hoping to get him to talk again, to talk to us.
I was hoping that he could try to connect with percy, hazel, and frank. Even Annabeth.
Although at least she, after learning more about him durinng oir time at camp, has became one of his friends. The only one with the brain that can understand leo and his mumbling.
Something me and Jason can't do.
But percy, frank and hazel are different.
They don't seem to like leo.
They are careful around him, bitter.
Hazel is nice to leo, she sometimes joins him when he bakes or cooks.
He loves showing her new recipes.
She is still weary of him, confused about his nature and personality.
Frank is bitter towards leo, even though I know the reason it still makes me feel a tad bit irritated.
He obviously trys his best, but leo, being leo, makes jokes. I mean, he did accidentally joke about franks weight.
Which was wrong but after days without water or food. Likely longer without sleep, he obviously wasn't right in the head to be doing anything.
A day after he apologized for a whole 10 mins without stoping, and even then all of us said it was okay and he could stop saying sorry.
I guess he still rubs off him the wrong way.
Which is fair even though he still hasent really given leo a chance to actually try to be friends.
Percy has acted a bit sour when leo is around.
Likely do to him blowing up new Rome, same with the same with the first to actually.
He has most definitely blames leo before finding our about him being possesed.
He loosened up on leo a bit, but not enough to even be close to being friends. More like coworkers who don't seem to like the other.
Leo seems to understand why, or doesn't.
He seems hurt, and likely blames himself.
Me, Jason, and Annabeth wanted to help them all get along.
Annabeth even said that percy and leo would get along great if they actually talked it out. Or tried harder. Which was part of her reason for helping me and Jason.
Today, we tried to get him out, to joke again, to be the light we all need again.
We missed him.
None of us know what he's going through, his head. I wish he would talk to us again.
I wish we could finnaly give him peace.
Why?
Why can't i just give him that?
Why can't i give him the care he deserves?
Why?
"I guess we should eat now, we can't do anything to help leo right now. He obviously wants to do his repairs." Hazel suggests, making my mouth go sour.
Annabeth scrunched up her nose, but stays quiet.
I don't talk much during lunch, just thinking about leo.
Oh how I wish I could understand him more.
I really do wish.
I wish we could have the same bond we had back at the wilderness school.
I wish he was okay, even if he wasn't before anyways.
I wish he felt safe again.
HERA
I look down at the argo 2, as I usually do now, making sure a certain demigod is okay.
Well, at least a little okay.
He hasn't been okay since... his mother's death.
I wished I could've helped him, to save him from the pain.
I wish I could've done more.
As I watch the six at the dining table, looking a bit gloomy, I decided I should do something other than watch this.
I should help them instead.
But what should I do?
How can I get them to understand leo bit more? To understand why he acts the way he does? To help them help out leo so he feels safe again, safe again like how he was when his mother was still alive.
That's when the thought struck me.
I should have them watch his memories! Let them see what his past was like.
Then maybe they could understand him, maybe be more patient with him.
Maybe know how to help him come out of his shell, his mask, get him to a space where he can be himself again.
Once he knows how to be himself again...
He is never himself since that place now.
But I'm determined to help him.
Even if he is going to hate this idea with every inch of his being.
I teleport in the room, bringing nico (somehow being Leo's friend, a close one at that), thalia, and Reyna.
Thalia is here because she is Jason's brother and because it's good for her to leant about leo.
Reyna here for basically the same reason.
"HERA!" Everyone screeches, pretty sure if I wasn't a goddess my ears would actually bleed.
I wonder if leo heard that, hope not.
Annabeth glares with all the hatred she could muster after years of knowing me. "What are you doing here?" She asks.
"To help, that's all."
Thalia raises an eyebrow, "Oh really? How so?"
"And why?" Percy adds.
"I see that some of you guys want to get closer to leo, understand him, help him." I look at piper, Jason, Annabeth, and nico as I start. "The rest of you guys seem to be.... rude to him. Like he's and irritating fly. He is not doing so well, but he's trying. Which is why I am here to tell you that you I'll watch Leo's memories. From when he was 0 years old to now, and don't worry, time is frozen, coach is in his room frozen. This will take about a week which is all the power I have and can spare."
Frank glares, "what? None of us are rude to him!"
I sigh and glare back. "Yes you have, don't try to argue with me. I have been watching over this ship, what's been happening is not to my likeing at all."
"But queen hera! Isn't this just invading his privacy?" Piper asks, eyes that are half glaring and half confused. She was always trying to protect leo. She always acted like a protective sister when it comes to him.
"It's for his own good, he needs help and I will do anything to give it to him."
She nods in understanding after a few moments, obviously not liking the idea but wanting to help leo is more important.
The rest seem unsure, but they don't fight.
"So how is this gonna work?" Nico questions.
Some of the others look at him with shocked expressions. He usually doesn't talk, especially not with a such a sincere tone. He looks like he wants to stab me.
He's like Leo's over protective friend.
It's still hard to imagine him as being his friends, but I'm glad leo has nico as a friend.
They do make a good duo.
I explain how I'm going to set up a room with a TV, it will show Leo's past on it. They will have food and water always. They will take breaks to eat and sleep. Also all the other things humans need to do. It will start with his childhood going into this quest. Then it's done.
"I'm going to get leo." I wave my hand, creating a TV in the common place with extra con for them to sit on.
They nod, saying nothing. Watching me leave to get our guest of honor.
I knock before walking in.
"Hey pi-...hera!" He yelps, walking back few steps before relaxing.
I open up my arms, giving him a huh. "Hey leo," I say, stepping back once more.
"Why are you here?"
I explain everything to him.
Once I do he breaks into tears, shocking me, he almost never cries. Even then, if he does it's silent. No noise.
He sobs, begging me to not do this, "they will hate me! Abandon me! They will leave me! Please you can't do this!"
He falls to his knees.
I sit down near him, pulling him into a hug, eventually he is sitting in my lap. Just as he did when he was small when he got hurt.
"It's okay leo, they won't hate you. They already agreed to do this. This is for your own good."
"Promise?" He whispers. Calming down a little.
"Promise." At that he calms down, already getting up.
"Okay..." he still sounds unsure, but at least he's agreed.
We walk into the room, he takes the TV in. Wincing at it, then glaring at it like it broke festus's wings.
The rest left the middle of the the counches to him.
He sits down, not even trying to smile bit instead scowling.
The others look at him in shock at his actions, as he usually smiles and laughs, making jokes left and right.
Now he does none of those.
I dissappear in a flash.
I hope this was a good idea..