What would you do if I abstracted tomorrow?

(This one plays the day right after episode 6)
Jax feels awful for everything he had said to Pomni the day before.
Caine had prepared another adventure for everyone individually, where they had to face their own biggest fears.
(Jax's biggest fear is Pomni abstracting)

Notes:

Ehhh... This is my first fanfiction on this platform so far and also my first fanfiction in this fandom...
I'm not a writer, English is not my first language and I used Grammarly to correct all my mistakes.
Idk how good or bad this is, so please don't judge me too hard on this one...
A friend had come up with the idea of a fanfiction like this, so I made it for her. I totally get why now, because this idea is actually awesome!!
Update: She loved it!!! I'm blushing so hard now...

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

The Amazing Digital Circus... Certainly, a place you didn't want to be in.

The same thought crossed Jax's mind while he lay in his bed, looking at the ceiling. He surely had said some things to Pomni he shouldn't have said the day before... he thought. Hearing every single word replaying in his head, he felt stupid.

"We were never friends."

"Are you SERIOUSLY gonna blame me for something that EVERYBODY else did too?"

"You didn't even know him."

"You don't even know what people are like before they abstract!"

"I do not care about you or anyone else in this circus in the slightest!"

"You are my playthings, and I get joy out of making you suffer."

"I'm the one who causes pain for fun!"

Who was he trying to be at that point? Every single word just pointed out even more that he was only trying to play some sort of villain or anything. Pomni sure hit a weak spot there, because at this point, he had certainly failed to be the funny one.

I don't care about her.

I don’t care about her!

I do NOT care about her!!!

And still... she didn't leave his thoughts. How could she? Trying to convince yourself that you didn't care about a certain person was indeed the opposite of forgetting about her.

Yesterday at the awards show, he already looked miserable; in this moment, he looked miserable. Hiding it sure was hard - he hadn't shown himself to the other members yet. If Caine had planned an adventure for today as well, he would need to get his head up and act like nothing happened. Just if it was that easy...

Jax got up, but not with his usual straight posture yet. He looked around in his gloomy room. His lights weren't turned on; there was just the bright light coming from the gap at the bottom of the door. He pushed it open and immediately got blinded by the lights of the hallway. He sure didn't like that feeling, but had to keep his cool. So he rubbed his eyes and returned to his usual straight posture. Only his face with a hint of annoyance remained.

He walked through the hallway and headed to the stage, expecting everyone else to be there as well.

"Who do we have here? Oh! Hello Jax!

You have arrived here just at the right time, fella! I have prepared another GENIUS adventure for you today!!! Because it's going to be personalized adventures for each of you!!! Isn't that just AMAZING???"

Caine said in his usual loud and way too engaged voice. It gave Jax almost a headache. Seemingly, the others didn't seem to like that sound as well. Because Zooble immediately asked.

"Uh... Caine?? Does that mean you have already prepared one for me as well...? Because I am not planning to be part of your b#÷<@&#× again."

"WHY DO YOU ALWAYS COMPLAIN EVERY TIME?!!!"

"..."

"…"

"Don't worry, Zooble! I'm sure you'll love it! Because this one is JUST made for YOU!!!"

Zooble still didn't look amused. Jax, back to his usual self, chuckled a little.

"Sooo... if the adventure I'm going to attend is going to be personalized just for me~~ I sure hope you did actually make it suit my taste... if you know what I mean~~"

Jax said, grinning. He was already mentally preparing for something where he could do whatever he wanted. But Cain quickly got this idea of his out of his head.

"Well... if you already ask me like this, I'm very delighted to explain it to you!!!

In this adventure, you're going to face your biggest fears~ and if you make it, you WIN!!!

And the BEST of all is: You are going to forget that this IS the adventure!!!"

Everyone already looked horrified. Zooble was

The first to complain.

"IS THIS ACTUALLY WHAT YOU THINK WHAT I F&<&@^# LIKE?!"

Their voice echoed through the whole circus and was quite intimidating.

Jax was still in his own thoughts, because he wasn't actually sure how this was gonna go. After all... he had already forgotten about his biggest fear. So he took a glance at Ragatha.

"It's probably going to be a room full of centipedes for you, Ragy~~"

"F... F#<@ YOU JAX!!!"

"Huh? Why me...? I haven't done anything yet~~"

Ragatha looked at Jax, a little defeated. He just winked at her with a smirk. Pomni, on the other hand, started to raise her voice a little when she mentioned:

"Uh... guys...? I thought Caine was NOT capable of controlling-"

Those were the last words she spoke before Caine snapped with his fingers and sent them off to their own adventures.

------------------

Jax opened his eyes, confused, and took a quick look around. It was all black. He seemingly just spawned in an empty and endless space that was just... black. He walked around a little. Heading one direction, then another.

"What kind of crap is this?!"

At some point, he just walked in only one direction because he couldn't care anymore. He just walked and walked into an endless void...

As the black color was already creeping into his mind, it slowly brought back his inner darkness itself. First, it started off with just the feeling of loneliness itself. But steadily it stirred up his own depression itself.

Oh yeah... first, all his thoughts about what Pomni had said to him. Then, all these times, he had tried to keep his human side, but gave up once he couldn't bear his own human emotions anymore.

So why did he still feel like a human?

He didn't like being his pathetic human self anymore. That part of himself that still kept a part of the real world in this stupid circus. That kind that was still miserable...

And still...

Why was it so difficult for him to let go of this side? He didn't know... he didn't know why he still felt bad for everything he said to Pomni. For everything that had happened before Pomnis' time. For everything had happened to... Ribbit...

Slowly but steadily, he saw some colored lights coming closer. They were red, pink, orange, blue, purple, green... all sorts of colors!!! They looked... hypnotizing.

The nearer Jax came to those colorful lights, the more he could make out what they actually were... they were abstracted beings. He passed by them one by one, while their glowing eyes just stared at him. Not hostile, but calm. Jax was creeped out by the amount he was seeing. The thought that every single one of them used to be an individual with a personality and feelings was weird. But now they all seemed like they belonged together... like one?

"Ugh... I don't like this already. What was Caine even thinking? Did I miss something, or why don't I know what that adventure is..."

"..."

"Hey CAINEEE!!! I think you accidentally spawned me in that stupid basement!!!"

Jax shouted. But he was not heard... as usual. That was how Caine could be sometimes... So he just kept walking. The number of abstracted ones was growing the further he walked. It creeped him out just even more. And still he kept walking.

Was Caine trying to scare him or something...?

And still, he asked himself... was this how many souls just ended up here? Like... they haven't been worth anything in the first place? If this nightmare never ended, he might end up just like one of those useless souls as well. All his glory is going to lose all his individuality and just end up... like this. Not to mention all the others from the circus... how might they abstract...?

Jax was already in a state where he felt really uncomfortable. His annoyance was slowly turning into a deeply sick, creeping feeling. It made his stomach turn. Just by his own thoughts... by his own mind.

So...

What if Pomni abstracted?

It was then that he started to hear something from far, far away. He just couldn't quite make out what it was. So he tried to come closer and closer, raising his pace. If this were the end of that adventure, it better be. Everything, just to not end up alone with his own thoughts, his own mind.

The abstracted ones he passed looked like they were coming closer, invading his personal space, bending over him, like there was no escape. The colorful lights grew in size until they were so large that, before he knew it, everything felt like it was all rainbow. The sounds he could make out turned into voices. Voices that sounded very familiar. Voices that were well known. He could hear them shouting something. But what were they shouting?

"..."

"... Jax..."

At this point, everything was already way too close, uncomfortably close. That sickening feeling in his stomach had only intensified.

"..."

"... JAX...!!!"

Yes... Someone was indeed calling him. It was like they were calling him hesitantly, in some sort of need. They even seemed to be someone he knew. Someone he was... close to. But the only one he could think of he used to be close to was someone who wasn't there anymore.

Or was someone still there?

One person he knew, but wouldn't like to realize...?

He started to walk a bit faster. Perhaps it was due to his own curiosity; eventually, it was his own heart that longed for this familiarity.

From afar, he could make out a silhouette. One that had made him come to realize who it actually was.

Yes.

It all made sense now...

His thoughts, this voice, this silhouette... it all made sense. Everything he had gone through all made sense now.

It was Pomni.

The person he was chasing after was Pomni. That girl, where he could feel like he was able to be himself again. That girl, he actually felt a close connection to. That girl, who saw right through him at times, he tried to hide from his true self.

So, why was he hiding so much of his true nature...?

Jax had to reach her, had to get close. After all this torture, in this rainbow-colored mess, he had to find her. He ran towards her as fast as he could. It didn't matter if he would collapse on the ground if he could just reach her.

"JAX!!!"

It was her voice.

Pomnis voice.

He ran even faster, not slowing his pace in the middle of his tracks. He couldn't risk even one second of being apart from her. He probably looked stupid while running.

As he came closer, she finally turned around in his direction. When she saw him, he relaxed a bit. She could see him, and Jax was almost about to be with her. Her hand was already held in his direction to reach, once he was there.

And just about when he was to hold it...

She pulled her hands right back, tight to her chest, and uttered a faint cry.

"Please... help me, Jax."

It was this moment when Jax noticed her body glitching, her shaking hands glitching so violently, it could almost resemble the pain it was holding. Her head, getting out of control as well, with only her heartbreaking face being recognizable for a brief moment before everything started to rapidly lose its shape and size.

Jax stopped right there and collapsed to the ground as he watched this scene of the one person he had actually cared about abstracting unfold. His heart dropped just as he fell to the ground. He just kneeled there and looked at her, defeated.

All the other abstracted ones just backed away to make some space for the next one to join them. Yes, Pomni.

Jax could have sworn he had heard his name once more spoken by her distorted voice, before she turned into an abstracted being herself and joined all the others in this basement.

"Pomni...?"

He didn't back away. Even if she did attack him, it was all deserved. He wanted to break down right here and then, if he hadn't already. All he did was just sit there and look at her in silence.

"Pomni you stupid jester..."

"..."

"F^#&!!!"

At first, he didn't have to say a lot, because any reasonable word had just left his mind. Nothing actually made sense now. Nothing he would say could make any difference at this point.