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Megan didn't even want to be dragged into this party. She gave Lara every excuse in the book.
"I have homework."
"I'm too tired."
"I wouldn't even know anyone there!"
Still didn't work due to the fact that she was sitting on a couch at some fraternity house. The smell of cheap liquor and shitty weed filled her nostrils; it made her dizzy. And the strobe lights in front of her didn't help the growing headache either. They flashed harshly into her eyes, but she couldn't look away, not when Daniela Avanzini was dancing directly in the center.
Megan had liked Daniela since she met her. They went to high school together, they were on the school's dance team. People always assumed that they had known each other for years just based on the way they instantly clicked. It was something unspoken between the two girls. Their chemistry was unmatched. No one said it, but everyone knew it.
When Daniela went to college, Megan had a year of grief. Her character switched, like a part of her left with Dani. And a part of her did. Anyone who remotely knew the two would agree that the two girls were a whole. One without the other was incomplete. So Megan worked hard. She worked harder than anyone had ever seen her. The once lazy and somewhat unfocused girl was now sharp, determined. Her drive? To get into the same college as Daniela.
And somehow it worked! The day she got her acceptance letter, she called Daniela.
"—And when my mom opened it, she cried. Probably harder than me!"
"Oh my gosh, that's so insane. But I'm so proud of you, Meg!" The nickname still gave flutters in the Canto girl's stomach, no matter how many times she had heard it.
"Thank you, Dani. I can't wait to see you again."
"Me too, I missed you so much." Megan felt her heart pounding out of her chest. The five words shouldn't have such an effect on her, but they did. And it scared the crap out of her.
"I missed you, too. Maybe I should dorm with you!" Megan had joked, causing Daniela to let out her heart-shattering giggle.
"Yes, that'd be so fun! And you should meet my boyfriend too, you two would get along so well!"
Oh.
There's the factor that Megan forgot to account for. She didn't even think of the possibility that Daniela would meet someone at college. I guess it was inevitable, Megan thought. Her face dropped immediately, but she kept her hopeful tone in her voice.
"Based on the pictures he posts, I'm sure we will." Megan pretends she's not about to smash her phone into two.
"I'm so excited, but hey, I gotta go. Jonah's taking me out tonight, and I gotta get ready soon. I'll t-t-y-l, I love you!" Daniela hangs up before she can hear Megan say the words back.
Since that call, Megan both dreaded and couldn't wait for the day she reunited with Daniela. She knew her boyfriend would be there too, so all she had to do was put on a face that didn't say," I'm gonna slit your throat in your sleep." Simple enough.
But Megan didn't even need to put on a face. She hated to admit that Daniela was right, but she was. She and Jonah got along way better than she expected. They talked about their shared interests in music, politics, gaming, skateboarding, and the list went on. He was essentially the male version of her. And he was perfect for Daniela. The only problem Megan had? She wished she were in his place.
This thought led Megan all the way to the party she was currently at. She wished she hadn't given in to temptation—cursed Lara Raj and her charming attitude. Speak of the devil, the Tamil girl ran up to her, breaking Megan free of her thoughts.
"Megan! What're you doing? Come and dance with me!" The girl on the couch pressed her lips together, nodding a meek no. Lara's eyebrows furrowed before looking to where Megan was spacing out towards. She instantly knows the reason behind her friend's sour attitude when she sees Daniela drunkenly dancing her night away with Jonah.
"Oh, honey," Lara says, sitting next to Megan and wrapping her arm around her. Her thumb rubs her shoulder in small and light circles.
"If it helps, I just got rejected by a girl because I looked too much like her sister." Megan slowly looks at Lara with a questioning face before bursting into laughter. Lara follows after, pulling Megan closer to her so she can rest on her shoulder. Their laughter calms down after a bit before Megan goes back to her longing stare at Daniela.
"You should tell her," Lara says. Megan breathed in and out before sitting up straight, "What would the point be in telling her? She's straight; she has a boyfriend. I'm risking ruining something between us."
Lara nods along to Megan's words before getting up. She gives Megan's shoulder a soft squeeze and a warm smile
"Try at least. It wouldn't hurt to." The older girl winks before walking off and getting lost in the crowd. Megan looks back at Daniela, and Jonah is no longer to be found. It's just her. Still drunk and still dancing. She inhales sharply, Lara's words still ringing in her head.
Try.
So she does. She collects all the courage she has and stands up. Her knees feel like they're about to give out so she starts pushing through the crowd, slowly making her way to Daniela. And when she gets there—
"Meggie! How… are you?" She slurred out, wrapping her arms around the other girl's neck. Based on how drunk Daniela was, Megan immediately knew this was a mistake.
"I'm good, Dani. How are you? Where's Jonah?" She asks, trying to avert her thoughts to something else.
"Mmm… Dunno. Said he was gettin' drinks. That was like… a min ago." This was a terrible idea. Megan hadn't seen Daniela this drunk before. She would leave her alone, maybe find Lara or a different pretty girl to hook up with, but she was afraid of what would happen to Daniela if she did. So she looked around. For what, she couldn't tell you. Maybe it was Jonah, maybe it was Lara, or maybe some sort of saving grace that would give her leverage in that moment. But all she found was an empty bathroom, so she took Daniela's hand in hers and dragged her over. Daniela, having no clue what was happening, followed her friend—what else could she do?
Megan locked the bathroom once both of them were inside and quickly texted Jonah their location. Daniela looked around the bathroom like she had never seen one before in her life. She sat on the counter and watched Megan as she frantically typed.
"Whatchu doing?"
"Texting Jonah." Daniela nodded, her drunken brain telling her to act like she knew what Megan was saying. Once Megan sent six to seven texts, she put her phone in her pocket and sighed.
"Jonah should be coming soon, he's just talking to some friends or something." Daniela looks back at Megan and frowns.
"Nooooooooo, I wanna spend time with you!" As much as Megan loves hearing those words, she knew it wasn't right. She needed Jonah to be here and take care of her. She needed to leave before she said something she'd regret.
"I would too, but you're too drunk to function. Someone needs to take care of you." Daniela pouts and takes Megan's arms to pull her closer.
"Then you take care of me…" Megan's breath hitches. Her heart beats faster than whatever shitty techno is playing outside the small space Megan put them in. She moves Daniela's hands to hold hers.
"Dani, I can't, it should be Jonah—"
"—I don't want Jonah, I -hic- want you!" Now Megan knows for sure that this was a bad idea. The girl was terrified at every drunken word that was spilling out of Daniela's mouth. It isn't right; none of what Megan is thinking is right.
Jonah, please hurry up.
"Dani, stop, you don't know what you're saying."
"And you don't know what you're doing." Damn. Daniela's drunk ass got her there. Megan doesn't know what she's doing. She doesn't know why she went to this party, why she decided to attend college just for Daniela, or why she fell in love with her straight best friend.
Daniela removed her hands from Megan's and moved them to her waist. Megan snapped out of her scrambled mind as Daniela pulled her closer. Daniela was moving on autopilot, spreading her legs so that Megan could fit in between. They were close. Too close.
"Did I ever tell you… how much… I love you?"
What the fuck?
Megan blushes a light pink, "Yes, Dani, you've told me many times."
Daniela giggles as she runs her hands up and down Megan's sides. The girl standing feels shivers every time Daniela presses her hands against her just a little harder. This was wrong. All about this was wrong. But why doesn't Megan want to stop her?
"Good… You're cute." Daniela looks Megan up and down before her eyes are still on Megan's lips.
"Mmm… Megan?"
"Yeah?"
"Kiss me." Megan's heart stops. If she thought this was wrong before, then this was illegal. This was crossing a boundary that Megan didn't know existed. She tried backing away, but when she did, Daniela trapped her with her legs. Her hands roamed against the sides of her before bringing them up to Megan's cheeks.
"Don't leave me… Not again…" What was Daniela even saying? None of it made sense, even if it did. There was something that wasn't being said, something missing. It sat between the two of them like a loaded gun. Megan didn't want to pick it up, but Daniela pulled the trigger anyway.
"This isn't right, Dani." The Latina scoffed, her expression somehow turning sober for a split second.
"When did you know what was right and wrong?" Daniela slurred her sentence till it became one muttered word.
"Aren't you nineteen? Don't act like you're twenty-five."
"Well then don't act like you have a crush on me."
"Who said I was acting?" Daniela said not a beat later. Megan had no time to process before Daniela moved her right hand to the nape of Megan's neck. She pulled her in close enough so that they could meet halfway, giving her a feverish kiss.
The younger girl's mind exploded. Nothing felt real in this moment except for Daniela's lips. She had imagined the feeling before, but actually feeling it was on another level. Every pull and tug from Dani trying to get her closer felt like a stab in the chest. She whinced, but not when Daniela nipped at her bottom lip, from the feeling that she got while kissing her. It was everything and nothing she hoped for. She imagined the moment to be sweet, something that they would both remember. But Daniela's drunk. And the chances of her remembering this night were slim to none.
Megan kissed back; she wasn't crazy after all. She still liked Daniela. But it wasn't in joy or victory. It was more of a goodbye. Because after tonight, this moment would be nothing more than a drunk illusion. Drunk to Daniela at least.
As Daniela's tongue attacked Megan's mouth, her mind attacked her heart. Every move was salt to the wound, fueling a grief Megan hasn't even reached yet. And as they pulled apart, a knock on the door ceased any notion of this going forward.
"Megan? It's Jonah, let me in!" Back to reality. Megan swallowed. She looked in the mirror to see her smudged lipstick. She grabbed toilet paper to quickly wipe it off, and Daniela looked at her like they weren't just making out.
"Where are you going?"
"Home." Daniela sighed as Megan composed herself. She opened her phone to shoot a quick text to Lara, telling her she'd be heading out of the party by herself. She then unlocked the door, and before she opened it Daniela pouted one last time.
"I wish you would stay."
Megan felt tears threatening her eyes before she twisted the doorknob.
"And I wish you were sober."