Archive of Our Own ^beta

About a month after Sawakita joined the team, Sendoh finds himself being approached with a, “Hey, can I talk to you about something?”.

Sendoh blinks, because Sawakita is usually more boisterous than that. The locker room is relatively empty, given that the rest had either left early, was squeezing every last bit of hot water from the showers, or were Rukawa and Mitsui playing one on one on court. He cocks his head, noting the nervous energy brimming from Sawakita’s question, and shrugs. “Sure, what about?”

Sawakita’s frame relaxes a tiny bit, and he grins. “Over drinks? Mitsui-san recommended me a bar last week, I’ve been meaning to check it out. My treat!”

Sendoh would not turn down free booze, so he grabs his sling bag, ready to leave, when his attention gets caught by a figure stepping into the locker room. Their team captain, Maki, has a towel wrapped over his waist, leaving Sendoh to unconsciously track his gaze down that tanned chest. The set of dark pink nipples hovering just above the pristine washboard abs that ripple with every small movement…Sendoh has seen a lot of toned bodies in his career but there’s something about Maki’s that always draw his eye.

“See you tomorrow, Maki-san!” Sawakita chirps and drags Sendoh by the arm out of the room quickly.

Sendoh blinks out of it fast enough to smile amusedly at the awkward wave Maki gives to them before the swinging door cut off his sight.

“What’s the rush?” he asks Sawakita, who had slowed down his steps once they’re halfway down the corridor. “Oh, you have some problems with Maki-san?”

It’d be unusual, because Maki is an amazing captain. Even Rukawa, the most notorious player of them all, has no bad words to say about him. But new player always comes with an adjusting period…

“No, nothing like that,” Sawakita hastily says, rubbing his neck. “It’s…—I’ll tell you later.”

The bar that Sawakita brings Sendoh to is much more upscale that he expects, with large drapery curtains dividing the bar into sections. If Sendoh had known this was the kind of vibe it was going to be, he’d wear jeans instead of some basketball shorts. Sawakita looks similarly a little out of place when he sinks into the plush sofa in one of these sections, curiously looking around. The bar counter is a little ways off, hidden by the curtain, giving them a semblance of privacy. If Sendoh had to admit, this feels much more like Maki’s scene than Mitsui’s, but he won’t speculate.

“What do you want to drink?” Sawakita asks, leg bobbing under his palm.

“Hm…whatever you’re having.”

“I don’t know what I’m having,” Sawakita admits. “What do people drink here?”

Wine? Whiskey? Sendoh shrugs. He’d prefer a beer though. “A martini?”

“Okay!” Sawakita is up and off behind the curtain before Sendoh can say more.

Well, it’s the first time that he’s hanging out with Sawakita like this, and he figures he’s always up for a new experience. Sawakita comes back eventually balancing two pyramid shaped glasses with some bright orange infusion inside and a lemon slice on the edge. Sendoh doesn’t bother asking what it is exactly, grabbing one of the glasses by its slim body to sniff. It smells…fruity. Out of the corner of his eye, he notices Sawakita licking the piece of lemon and making a scrunched up expression immediately after.

“What? The girl at the bar told me to lick it!” Sawakita says in protest when Sendoh chuckles.

“No, you lick the salt,” Sendoh points to the crystals on the martini glass. “Then bite the lemon and drink.”

Sawakita squints at him distrustfully, but follows when Sendoh proceeds to do what he had said. The salt, tang, and then sweetness of the liquor…oh, it’s good. When he opens his eyes after the first savour, he sees Sawakita polishing off the entire glass.

Oh, that’s probably not good.

Sawakita sighs once he’s swallowed, face reddening from the drink almost immediately. “Hey, Sendoh, I’m really glad you’re here.”

Sendoh pauses before he remembers to react. “Uh huh. It’s nice to have you in the team too.”

“That’s what I mean,” Sawakita flops backward, voice becoming more sedated. “I don’t know who else to talk to about thing kind of thing.” It’s obvious that there really is something Sawakita needs to get off his chest, so Sendoh stays silent. “Y’know, Rukawa is just so mean… I told him I wanted to chat and he looked at me like I killed his family…”

“Kaede looks at everyone like that,” Sendoh inserts, while sipping on his martini. “Don’t take it personally.”

“And Mitsui-san is really nice but he doesn’t really want to talk to me about anything except basketball…same goes for Maki-san…”

“It’s only been a month, Sawakita,” Sendoh reasons. “They don’t know what else to talk to you about yet.”

“Is this…reverse home sickness?” Sawakita wonders out loud. “I wanted to come back from America for so long but I didn’t expect it would be that hard once I got back…”

Sendoh raises his eyebrows a bit, because he’d definitely did not catch Sawakita being anything but excited that he’s back in Japan after ten years away from home soil. He gestures discreetly to a staff who had appeared within distance to take Sawakita’s empty glass and orders another round.

“I mean, you do know all of us,” Sendoh tries to soothe. “We’ve obviously watched your matches when you left. And you had Kaede there with you for a bit—“

Sawakita turns, face mushed into the sofa. “He doesn’t want to help me,” he whines. “He says I’m being stupid. But it’s not stupid!”

Two more martinis gets delivered to their table, and the staff vanish promptly like a ghost. Sawakita pays it no mind, grabbing one glass to slurp.

“I mean, you wouldn’t call being in love stupid, would you?” Sawakita demands, eyes going brighter while his cheeks flush deeper. “It’s not like I can help how I feel!”

“He’s just a hater,” Sendoh says, sliding his fingers together intriguingly. “Who’s the lucky girl?”

“Ryota,” Sawakita says, with a sigh in his tone. “God, I can’t stop thinking about him…”

Sendoh blinks, mind whirring to place that familiar name.

The Shohoku number 7, Miyagi Ryota, who had been in America with Sawakita, but came back to Japan to join Ryukyu about two years ago. They’re an alright team, so Sendoh can’t really understand why it would be anyone’s first choice other than sentiment (Miyagi).

Sendoh blinks again before he finishes off his first glass. Huh. Well, he’s not one to judge, but he didn’t really expect it since the numerous paparazzi pictures of Sawakita appearing with some blonde girl every other year.

“I wanted to join Ryukyu, you know,” Sawakita shares. “But they’re not interested, apparently they’re focusing on upcoming rookies—“

“They couldn’t afford you, you mean?” Sendoh reads in between the lines. “Miyagi-san probably costs enough on his own.”

Sawakita shrugs, staring at the ceiling. “I said I would be willing to take a paycut, but…”

Sawakita turns to stare hard at his half drunk martini, and then swallows the rest of it. Sendoh looks at the last full glass on the table and discreetly slides it to him, who grabs it without even thinking.

“So,” Sendoh begins in the quiet as Sawakita starting drinking again. “Even with the paycut, it didn’t work out?”

“Never got to negotiate,” Sawakita answers, voice a bit buzzed. “Ryota yelled at me when I suggested it, and my agent refused to do it, so…” he exhales. “I signed the next best thing, with you guys. But I miss him so much…”

“Okinawa is not that far away,” Sendoh says sensibly. “A three hour flight at most?”

“It’s not that,” Sawakita mumbles. “I offered to go every weekend since I got here but Ryota shut me down… he told me he needed to make friends here. He doesn’t get it, Sendoh,” he starts rubbing his short shaved head repeatedly. “What else can I do?”

“Slow down a bit,” Sendoh leans forward to tug Sawakita’s martini glasses away from him before he takes another mouthful. “What’s the actual problem here?”

Sawakita frowns and grabs the glass back. “I came back to Japan for him, isn’t it obvious enough?” he pouts, then looks at Sendoh. “It’s practically a, a….proposal, right, so why is Ryota so…so…” he slumps on the sofa. “Why he doesn’t see it?”

Sendoh eyes the unmoving lump for a bit. He’s starting to get the gist of this problem, which seems to be unrequited love. Or maybe just a misunderstanding between two extremely dense people.

“For starters, did you tell him directly that you came back to Japan for him?”

“I told him I was returning because I wanted to play with him again,” Sawakita continues in that defeatist tone. “He said then I shouldn’t whine about signing on with a different team.”

“Well,” Sendoh cocks his head. “…Did you tell him your feelings then?”

“I do tell him that I like him! Like everyday!” Sawakita responds indignantly. He huffs for a bit before he slides his phone out of his pocket to tap to a private chat. “Here, you can see it for yourself.”

Sendoh is not one to turn down a prime opportunity to look at some secrets, so he takes the phone and scrolls up the chat. There’s nothing really incriminating about the conversations, but Sawakita makes a point to say ‘that’s why I like you so much’ with many heart emojis at least once everyday and Miyagi reacts either with a raised eyebrow or huffing face emoji, depending on the day.

Clearly, Sawakita is being friend zoned here. Sendoh puts the phone down with sympathy.

“I’m going to get us more drinks,” Sendoh declares, standing up. “Then let’s talk about what you’re going to do about Miyagi-san.”

Sawakita sniffs, eyes welling up. “I knew I could trust you!”

Sendoh is definitely nursing a bit of a hangover when he turns up for practice the next morning. Sawakita, in contrast, is looking absolutely fresh faced and invigorated from his pre-practice match with Mitsui, the other one who regularly comes early. It shouldn’t be possible, because Sawakita drank like eleven of those martinis while they brainstormed the Miyagi problem.

Sendoh thinks Sawakita should just fly to Okinawa and kiss Miyagi if he really wanted a straight (ha) answer, but Sawakita says he’s banned from going and he didn’t want to piss Miyagi off. That kind of thinking is likely why Sawakita is still stuck in his problem, but Sendoh keeps his mouth shut. After all, Sawakita doesn’t seem like the type of guy who can handle really hard truths.

“Had fun with Sawakita last night?”

Sendoh resists the urge to jump a foot in the air when Maki’s voice suddenly appears from behind him.

“Didn’t see you there, Captain,” he says amicably, turning his gaze back toward the other two hopping around the court. “I didn’t drink that much,” he continues. “Sawakita on the other hand…”

Maki’s lips curl at the edges. “You’re wearing sunglasses.”

“I always wear sunglasses when it’s sunny,” Sendoh interjects. “Also, before you ask, he’s fine. He just has an unrequited crush.”

It’s funny to see Maki blink, then blink again, like he’s trying to process words he’s never heard before. “…I did not ask.”

“Thought you should know,” Sendoh shrugs. “Since you’re the captain.”

“As long as it’s not a problem on court, Sawakita can do whatever he wants,” Maki says finally.

“…You’re not even going to ask who he likes?”

“I’m sure you’re going to tell me,” Maki says, side eyeing him.

“Oh, I am,” Sendoh grins. “But you have to guess first.”

“Not playing this game with you, Sendoh,” Maki pats the back of Sendoh’s shoulders before he makes to walk off. “Get changed, coach is here.”

Sendoh sighs, noticing their coach and Rukawa coming unto the court. Damn.

Sendoh should get a medal for how it keeps it in throughout the entirety of the day, even with his lightly throbbing headache. Finally he gets a chance alone with Maki in the locker room by deliberately taking a long shower, stepping out just in time to see Maki pulling on a fresh shirt. Sendoh quickly averts his eyes when Maki turns around, looking surprised to see him still around.

“Not your best on court today,” Maki says, but it isn’t stern. “Lay off the drinks on the weekday, alright?”

“I was doing a good deed,” Sendoh protests, and he totally catches Maki walking towards the sinks just so that his back is turned when Sendoh drops the towel to change. “You know, moving countries is hard, even if it’s back to your home country.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Maki says mildly. “But it was nice of you to hear Sawakita out,” he acknowledges.

“Yeah, he’s really fixated on Miyagi-san,” Sendoh nods. “Miyagi Ryota, that Shohoku point guard now at Ryukyu. That’s who he has a crush on, by the way.”

Maki doesn’t roll his eyes, but he seems close to it. “I figured.”

“You can give him some advice,” Sendoh offers. “I’m sure he’s listen to you. Also, you don’t have to keep awkwardly standing there, Captain,” he continues with a bit of an amusement. “I’m done changing.””

Maki only gives him a bland look, ignoring that comment, when he turns around. “Not my area of expertise,” he replies. “Besides, if Sawakita wanted my advice, he would’ve come to me.”

“You’ve dated around,” Sendoh ignores the second half of the answer, because the first half is much more interesting. “That’s definitely the most expertise we have on this team.”

Maki raises on eyebrow. “So have you.”

Sendoh waves it away. “Who’s counting, Maki-san?” he says casually, because he doesn’t really to say that he’s had more hook-ups than actual dates. “But if we’re counting, Kaede has like, zero, and Mitsui-san… he flirts but I haven’t actually seen him take anyone home,” he muses. “You probably know though.”

It’s no secret that Maki and Mitsui sometimes hang out to drink (Sendoh squeezed that information out from Mitsui, of course). He hasn’t been successful is learning what they actually talk about, but it’s probably gossip about the team. That’s what Sendoh would do, at least.

Maki doesn’t give anything away. “I don’t really know Miyagi-san, but he seems like a good person. I’m sure Sawakita will work it out.”

“You have such faith in Sawakita,” Sendoh muses. “I actually think he’s gonna have a mid-life crisis about whether he should play basketball with us or move to Okinawa to chase the love of his life. Now that’s going to affect the team.”

Maki doesn’t take the bait, however. “I’m sure you’ll tell me before it happens.”

“I like to keep you appraised,” Sendoh says. “Of the team. I bring value.”

“I appreciate it,” Maki says, although he looks like he’s almost going to chuckle.

“Oh, we should definitely do something together,” Sendoh blurts, thought coming to his mind. Sawakita obviously still feels a bit detached from the team, so some team bonding activity would help. And they can also do a mass brainstorm for Sawakita’s Miyagi problem. “Like we haven’t hung out without basketball in so long.”

Maki stares at him for a while, but eventually he rubs his chin. “I’m not opposed to it. I’m taking my yacht out this weekend. We could do some fishing?”

Sendoh perks up, genuinely. It was by total coincidence, but they crossed paths at the seaside sometime in high school and found out that Maki is an avid ocean swimmer while Sendoh is obsessed with fishing. It’s not like they coordinate their plans, but they do see each other there every odd weekend in the distance.

It’s the first time Maki has offered his yacht though. “Really?”

“Seems like it might be….fun,” Maki says.

“It’s the best,” Sendoh grins. “I love it. Kaede is going to hate it.”

“Rukawa?” Maki cocks his head, surprised at the mention. “Well, he…he doesn’t have to come if he—“

“No, no, no,” Sendoh smiles wider, almost giddy. “It’s a team activity! Of course it’s mandatory! It’s mandatory, right?”

Maki’s expressions flitter, but eventually it settles unto one that reads ‘fond exasperation’ to Sendoh. How ‘fond’ it is, who knows.

“I’ll send you the details.”

A yacht.

A fucking yacht.

Sendoh maybe could afford one on his salary but he’s heard the horror stories of pro athletes burning their retirement away with poor choices, so he’s rather conservative with his money. Maki, on the other hand, is from a family who owned a yacht before he even went pro, and therefore does not have the same problem.

Sendoh is having the absolute time of his life while he sorts out his fishing rods on deck while the boat speeds away from shore. Sawakita pokes at his gear curiously, ever so often reaching to touch something he definitely shouldn’t, while Mitsui and Maki lean against the edge of the railing to chat.

Rukawa is in the air conditioned interior cabin, sulking out of the sunlight after Sendoh had dosed him with sunscreen. He doesn’t budge even after everyone else had gone through Sendoh’s tutorial of how to sink a line, and have reduced to the waiting game.

“Kaede, wake up, the weather is beautiful,” Sendoh nudges the other, arousing him from what looked like to be a nap.

“I hate you,” Rukawa mutters, like he hasn’t muttered that for the last ten times already. “I don’t want to go fishing. It’s boring as hell.”

“We have a bet ongoing now,” Sendoh says. “Whoever catches the biggest fish gets to be ace for the next match.”

Rukawa’s eyebrows furrow as he groggily sits up. “You can’t just decide the ace for a match, and I’m obviously the ace.”

“Sawakita caught a two centimeter anchovy like ten minutes ago so you are definitely losing.”

“That’s bullshit. I’m not playing.”

“Then you’re not winning.”

“I’m not falling for your stupid game.”

Seeing that Rukawa is in a terrible mood, Sendoh relents. He shuffles over to the ice box and digs through for something that’s not fizzy or alcoholic. It takes a while before he finds a can of green tea. Rukawa looks at him suspiciously but he does take the offered can to open and drink. Small wins.

“Why are you so mad?” Sendoh queries when he jostles Rukawa to move so that he can squeeze with him on the seat, despite there being many other seats. “It’s not like you were gonna do anything this weekend.”

Rukawa flashes him his annoyed glare, but he’s not that annoyed seeing that he does shuffle his butt to make space. “I had plans.”

“Like?”

“Basketball,” Rukawa mumbles.

Sendoh resists the urge to rolls his eyes. “I was planning to go fishing anyway, so I wouldn’t have been free.”

“Not with you,” Rukawa spits, like Sendoh hadn’t been his first choice basketball buddy for years.

“Then?”

“Mitsui-senpai.”

Oh, the second choice basketball buddy. “Right, you lost the last round—“

“I didn’t lose,” Rukawa huffs, and Sendoh hides his smile. It’s honestly so easy to push Rukawa’s buttons. “He fucking cheated.”

“Don’t tell lies, Rukawa,” the accused cheater—Mitsui—floats in, fanning his neck. “It was a three pointer death match, I won fair and square. Oof, it’s way too hot outside,” he says, and then casually grabs the can that Rukawa is holding to drink it himself.

Rukawa blinks at the action, but Mitsui is already digging through the ice box with his other free hand to pull out a bottle of mineral water. He shoves that at Rukawa instead.

“This has caffeine,” Mitsui shakes the green tea can in explanation. “You’re not going to sleep tonight if you keep drinking this.”

“I’m already having a nightmare,” Rukawa grumbles, uncapping the water to drink.

Huh. Sendoh hadn’t noticed Rukawa’s recent diet changes. “Not even tea, anymore?”

“I sleep better without,” Rukawa replies, and then he glares at Sendoh like it’s Sendoh’s fault that he ruined his caffeine free streak.

“You just need to learn how to relax,” Sendoh tells him, for the billionth time. “Try some fishing. It’s super relaxing.”

“Actually, it’s really stressful,” Mitsui cuts in, and Sendoh cranes his neck to see the other rummaging through another box to take a watermelon out and reaches for a knife to cut it open. “I broke like, five lines, while trying to reel it in.”

“You just need some ‘hands on’ guidance, Mitsui-san,” Sendoh smiles, leaning on his palm.

Mitsui laughs. “It’s alright, I don’t think anyone is going to beat Maki today. He just caught one this uh…” he drops the knife for a second to gesture about the size of a shoe, “…big.”

Sendoh whistles. “Nice.”

“Not gonna throw your hat in the ring, Sendoh?”

“Nah, I don’t want to be the ace,” he says, watching Mitsui pile half of the watermelon he’d cut onto a plate to carry over. “I leave all the flashy plays to you guys.”

“Like you don’t show off all the time, you show off,” Rukawa mutters low.

“Say that again, Kaede?” Sendoh leans towards him, but Rukawa is distracted by Mitsui passing him a slice of the fruit.

Mitsui puts the plate down and then flops unto the opposite seat. Sendoh reaches for one of the red triangle slices himself, munching on the crisp sweetness. Ooh, it’s so good.

“Say, Mitsui-san,” Sendoh begins, catching Mitsui gnaw on the rind of the watermelon, which is honestly a bit weird. “You know Miyagi-san.”

“Of course. What’s up?”

“Is he gay?”

Mitsui chokes, accidentally biting the rind in half. It takes nearly a minute before Mitsui settles, wiping his mouth. “Uh…why do you ask?”

“Well you see,” Sendoh starts very seriously, “Sawakita is in love with him, but all his advances have been rebuffed, so I thought you might know if he bats for the team, so to speak. Either he’s deliberately being oblivious to spare Sawakita’s feelings or he’s really just not getting it. Any answers?”

Mitsui coughs again. “Sawakita is what?”

Sendoh tells it again from the top.

When he’s finished, Rukawa is distinctly unimpressed. “This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Put yourself in his shoes, Kaede,” Sendoh tells him. “He changed his entire life and career because of Miyagi-san. He wants the reciprocation.”

Rukawa scoffs. “He’s putting expectations on someone who didn’t ask for it,” he says bluntly. “That’s not love. That’s just being selfish.”

“Huh,” Sendoh pauses. “That’s unexpected, coming from you.” As Rukawa glares at him, he conitnues. “So, according to your take, he shouldn’t try to get his feelings across to Miyagi-san then,” Sendoh says.

“He made his choice so he should live with it. Without whining,” Rukawa returns flatly.

Surprisingly logical but hugely boring. Sendoh turns to another. “Mitsui-san, what’s your take?”

“Uhh….” Mitsui fumbles. “I don’t know. I mean, it’s between them, right? We shouldn’t pry.”

“Sawakita came to me for help,” Sendoh says. “I think he wants someone to give him a push.”

“Still…” Mitsui starts, but it’s obvious that he has plenty more to say. “I mean, Miyagi doesn’t talk to me about these things. I know he had a crush on Ayako-chan for the longest time but that fizzled when he went to America…”

“Who is this ‘Ayako-chan’?” Sendoh asks, intrigued.

“Oh, she’s Tokyo Verdy’s team manager now. Used to be our manager in Shohoku.”

“And besides Ayako-san, he’s never shown an interest in anyone?”

“I told you, we don’t talk about these things.”

“Then what do you guys talk about?”

“Mostly harping on the time I almost killed him,” Mitsui says, sighing. “He doesn’t let me live it down.”

“Wait, what?”

“As if you have the guts to kill anybody,” Rukawa scoffs. “You messed up the court once and then begged for forgiveness right after.”

“Hey,” Mitsui scowls. “I did put Miyagi in the hospital!”

“He had a bike accident which did that,” Rukawa rolled his eyes. “He told me.”

“Because I pushed him too far! I can acknowledge that!”

Sendoh has his eyes wide, wondering why he’s never heard of this…incident…until now. “Tell me more.”

“There’s nothing else,” Rukawa shoots him down.

“Yeah, it’s not…something I want to bring up again,” Mitsui adds quickly. “Back to Miyagi. I don’t see how we can help them. It’s their thing.”

Sendoh sighs, because who knew his team is so unromantic. “Okay, but imagine that you had a crush on someone who’s like totally oblivious, someone like…Kaede,” he gestures, making Rukawa frown. “You’ve told him multiple times that you like him, but he doesn’t understand it because he’s never experienced love in his life. Don’t you want to at least make him understand so you have a clear answer?”

Mitsui’s gaze shifts to Rukawa, and then back to Sendoh again. “I think I’d just kill myself.”

“Fuck off,” Rukawa says while Sendoh and Mitsui burst out laughing. “I’m not that stupid. I would know.”

Mitsui chuckles, wiping away some moisture from the corner of his eyes. “Yeah, I have to agree with Rukawa though. I mean, he would just ask me point blank what I mean. And then he would kill me.”

Sendoh exhales the last of his laughter. “And what if Kaede told you he likes you, and you don’t believe him?”

“Stop using me an example,” Rukawa snaps, but Mitsui is humming under his breath.

“He’s never going to do that,” Mitsui shrugs.

“There it is,” Sendoh points. “If Miyagi-san doesn’t believe Sawakita means it in that way—“

“Same question to you,” Mitsui cocks his head. “If Rukawa told you he likes you, wouldn’t you think there’s something wrong with him?”

“I’m right here,” Rukawa inserts, louder.

“It’s not about belief,” Mitsui continues, like he hadn’t heard. “It’s that it’s out of character. Sawakita on the other hand is an affectionate guy, so it’s not that he wouldn’t say it, it’s that he says it too often that it can be taken in a platonic way.”

“So he needs to be more explicit about it,” Sendoh follows on. “That’s what I said, but Sawakita is afraid that Miyagi-san would think he’s joking.”

“Again, it’s their issue to solve,” Mitsui crosses his arms. “I don’t think you can meddle in this one, Sendoh.”

“I’m being concerned,” Sendoh denies, then catches a movement at the door. “Oh, Sawakita’s coming.”

Sure enough, Sawakita bursts in holding a fairly large fish with both hands above his head, like a trophy. “GUYS, GUYS!” he yells, excited. “I CAUGHT THIS! I DID IT! ME! SOMEONE TAKE A PHOTO OF ME, QUICK!”

Mitsui looks suitably impressed, gesturing for Sawakita to pose as he whips out his phone. Rukawa is off rolling his eyes somewhere while he curls his feet up in the space Sendoh vacated to look at the catch.

“That’s…wow,” Sendoh blinks, tracing the spine. It’s almost the size of the entire length of Sendoh’s forearm. “You’ve got talent at this, Sawakita. You should come fishing with me sometime.”

Sawakita beams. “I would love to,” he says, following Sendoh’s instructions to go the deck to put it into a pail of water for storage. “Ah, but…”

“What’s wrong?”

“Ryota—he…he would be worried. He doesn’t stop me, but I don’t want to make him worry.”

“Oh?”

“…Sorry, not my story to tell,” Sawakita sobers for a moment before his jovial smile is back on. “I’ll think about it. Thanks, man.”

Sendoh nods, letting him go. Sawakita wanders back into the interior cabin, so Sendoh turns to the alone person lounging on deck with sunglasses on. Maki is lying down stone still, but he turns his head when Sendoh steps close.

“I thought you would catch something,” Maki says.

“Ah, I have to give some chances to the beginners,” Sendoh smiles, plonking himself down next to the tanned figure. “Sawakita’s unnaturally good at everything, as usual.”

“Hm,” Maki hums non-committed. “You didn’t fish, Rukawa didn’t either, and Mitsui gave up after thirty minutes,” he continues. “I’m obviously no competition either.”

“Don’t tell yourself short, Captain,” Sendoh nudges him. “You caught like twelve fishes, decent sized, whereas Sawakita caught only three. I saw the buckets.”

Maki tilts his head. “It’s going to be a nice dinner.”

“Exactly, you’re the provider,” Sendoh says, and can’t resist adding, “Always have been.”

“Thanks, Sendoh. I appreciate that.”

Sendoh feels just a bit warm inside, but it’s probably because he’s been sitting out in the sun for too long.

It is a nice dinner. They have the fishes grilled fresh on deck, with a scattering of salt. Delicious. Sendoh takes a few pictures for Uozumi just to get a string of text scolding him that they should’ve brought it to his restaurant to have it prepared as sashimi instead. Sawakita is busy taking a video log with the sunset behind him, while Maki rinses the grill. Mitsui is picking the bones out of one of the grilled fishes before he passes it to Rukawa, who chomps it down.

Sendoh squints at the sight. It’s not anything out of the ordinary, since he’s seen Mitsui fuss over Rukawa with numerous things before. He’s never thought much about it because he knows they have a familiar relationship stemming from their Shohoku days.

But he squints this time because Rukawa suddenly stops eating to grab Mitsui by the forehead before the other moves to bite on a chunk of fish. Mitsui yelps, but Rukawa reaches to pull a thin and sharp bone out before flicking it onto the table. Mitsui blinks, wide, then cautiously returns to eat his fish.

Rukawa would’ve only spotted that if he was watching Mitsui while he ate. It’s the weirdest thing, because while Rukawa is pretty aware of his surroundings, it seems like a bit of a stretch to expect that he would be paying attention to something someone else was eating. Sendoh is pretty sure Rukawa does not watch him while they eat.

He says nothing about it, not even when they part ways when they get back to shore. Maki offers to drive Sawakita and Mitsui back home, while Sendoh hops into a taxi with Rukawa, since they live in the same direction. Rukawa automatically turns his head to look out of the window, and Sendoh can see his eyes start to close.

“Hey,” Sendoh starts, nudging the other by the arm. “I wanna ask you something.”

“Don’t be annoying,” Rukawa mutters.

“Do you think Mitsui-san likes you? Like, in the Sawakita way.”

To Rukawa’s credit, he doesn’t even react. “Don’t be stupid.”

“No, really, I’m being serious,” Sendoh says. “He dotes a lot on you. Like, he knew about your caffeine thing, which you didn’t tell me.”

“I didn’t tell him. He noticed.”

“What’s what I mean. He pays a lot of attention to you. He handed you a watermelon slice—which he didn’t give me, by the way—and he also prepared your dinner.”

“You should take it up with senpai if you’re jealous,” Rukawa mutters.

“I will,” Sendoh shoots back. “But he’s definitely not aware about it,” he says, and then pauses for a deliberate second to really say the thing he wanted to say. “But you are. And you like it. You like him.”

Rukawa is silent, unmoving like he’d dozed off, but Sendoh knows him too well.

“Since when did you like him, Kaede?” Sendoh nudges him again. “I mean, I was thinking about something Sawakita said to me. He said that he moved back to Japan because of Miyagi-san, and I was thinking…when you came back, you signed on to this team. You didn’t even consider any other offers. And I know it’s not me, because I joined the year after you did, and so it’s either Maki-san or Mitsui-san, and it’s so fucking obvious when I think about it now—”

“I didn’t join this team for anyone,” Rukawa interrupts annoyed, clearly having given up pretending to sleep. “I joined the team because it was better than the rest. Just because you have some ideas from Sawakita doesn’t mean it applies to me.”

“Sure,” Sendoh replies, clearly patronising, because Rukawa glares at him. “There are not many people you care about, Kaede, and I just saw you watch him the entire time he was eating because you were afraid he was going to choke on a bone.”

“Don’t be a creep,” Rukawa snaps. “It would have been a real pain if he did choke. He always eats too fast.”

“How sweet,” Sendoh says. “You’ve never done that for me.”

“If you don’t shut up I will leave you to choke and die.” Unfortunately, Rukawa threatens him so often that it honestly has no impact at all. “Besides,” Rukawa turns his head away, scowling. “What about you and Maki-san?”

Sendoh furrows his eyebrows. “What about me and Maki-san?”

Rukawa scoffs. “You leer at his chest whenever he’s shirtless. It’s disgusting.”

“Hey,” Sendoh frowns, admittedly thrown off that Rukawa had noticed his eye candy. “I—I may be looking, because he’s…objectively in great shape. Doesn’t mean I have other intentions,” he says, reaching to pat Rukawa on the arm gently. “I’m not trying to tease you, Kaede. I just want to support you. Honest.”

Rukawa is not bought. He never is. “…You can support me by shutting the fuck up.”

Oof. Sendoh sighs. “Fine, I’ll drop it. I’m just going to say ‘I told you so’ the next time.”

Sendoh drops it for the entirety of the taxi ride. When he’s at home at his own apartment, under the pour of his shower, he can’t believe he’d been so blind. He knows Rukawa better than anyone. How could he have missed this? Granted, Rukawa has always put everyone at a distance, and if Rukawa had told him he was basketball sexual Sendoh would’ve believed it. Heck, Sendoh probably believed that for years, until now.

It’s just so obvious now, when he thinks about it. Dragging Rukawa to do things has always been like dragging a cat into bathwater. Sendoh’s been at the butt end of Rukawa’s many ‘no’s and ‘leave me alone’s. Sometimes it even takes a bit of nagging before Rukawa agrees to come play basketball with him on the weekend. And yet Rukawa has always sought Mitsui to play one on one. Sendoh knew Rukawa did that back in Shohoku and so never questioned it. After all, Mitsui is pretty much an all rounder with a specific sharpshooting talent that makes it annoying enough to be challenging and fun.

Rukawa lives for basketball. And yet he came back to Japan for this life.

Sendoh is re-evaluating everything he’s ever known about Rukawa. He composes a long rambling text to Maki for nearly five minutes, and then before he hits the send button he realises Maki would probably think he’s gone insane seeing that it’s practically midnight. He carefully backtracks and deletes it before typing again.

I found out Rukawa has a crush on Mitsui-san.

He stares at it for a minute, and when no reply comes, he adds,

Did you know?

Maki’s online marker turns to ‘typing’, and he gets a message quickly.

I did not.

Sendoh slouches on his bed and starts typing.

Obviously, he denied it. But he got defensive and even threatened me, so he's definitely guilty. I can’t believe he kept this from me.

Seeing that you immediately told me, I can see why.

You’re not supposed to side with him, captain. Your teammate is in distress. That’s me. I’m the teammate.

Sendoh can imagine Maki’s curled up lips.

Why are you in distress? You should be happy for him.

Because. Sendoh pauses, then tries again. Because he thinks he has to hide it. He should know that I wouldn’t judge, and neither would you, and Sawakita’s in the same boat, so neither would he.

Maki takes a long time to reply this one, but what comes is just one sentence.

Maybe it’s just one thing he wants to keep for himself.

I’m just sharing because I care :(

I know you do.

Do you think Mitsui-san reciprocates? I can list you eight separate times he fussed over Kaede and not me today.

Good night, Sendoh.

Sendoh sighs, dropping his phone to his chest.

When Monday rolls around, Sendoh takes the effort to come in earlier than usual. Since Maki rebuffed any openings to get more insight on Mitsui, he thought he’d speak to the man himself. As expected, Mitsui is the first one there as always, but instead of shooting hoops he’s seated at a corner, slipping through a sport magazine.

There’s also Rukawa sleeping on Mitsui’s outstretched lap. Sendoh raises an eyebrow at the scene, but Mitsui only waves at him in greeting when he notices him hovering over them.

“Hey,” Mitsui nods, putting down his magazine, like it was a common everyday occurrence to have Rukawa using his thigh as a pillow. “You’re early.”

“Yeah…” Sendoh trails off, still distracted by the presence of Rukawa on the floor dead to the world. “What’s up with Kaede?”

“He couldn’t sleep,” Mitsui says, absentmindedly, patting Rukawa’s head. “I told him to come here since he was awake. He dozed off just about five minutes ago.”

“He should take the day off,” Sendoh says quietly, setting his things down to sit next to them.

“You know he won’t do that,” Mitsui replies. “Let him nap a bit, and we’ll see how he holds up later.”

“Yeah,” Sendoh agrees. “…You care a lot about him,” he starts, casually.

Mitsui only shrugs. “Sure. So do you.”

Sendoh sighs inwardly. He wonders if he should bring up the fact that Mitsui did not personally hand him a slice of watermelon but it just sounds petty now.

“I spoke to Miyagi yesterday,” Mitsui says in the lapse of silence, and Sendoh sits up. “I asked him if he has a….thing with Sawakita.”

“And?”

“He asked what was wrong with me.”

Sendoh can’t help but crack a laugh. “Could you guess if he does have a thing for Sawakita?”

“No,” Mitsui says eventually. “I told him that Sawakita seemed to miss him and he just called Sawakita a ‘big cry baby’ and ‘he’ll get over it’. He was probably joking…that’s all I got.”

“You’re terrible at this, Mitsui-san.”

“Hey, I don’t want to pry too much,” Mitsui defends. “What they do is um…” he hand waves a gesture. “Up to them.”

Sendoh almost pouts. “You’re not concerned about your friends?”

“Well, I’m here if Miyagi wants to talk, and he didn’t,” Mitsui says simply. “Besides, it’s not like I can give him much advice.”

“I’m sure you have your share of confessions, Mitsui-san,” Sendoh smiles.

“Yeah, yeah,” Mitsui ruffles the back of his head awkwardly. “It’s not like any of those panned out…”

“Why not?”

Mitsui hums then tilts his head, looking at Sendoh seriously. “Have you dated anyone seriously recently?”

“Interested in my love life? It’s certainly more colourful than Kaede’s.”

Mitsui snorts, probably knowing that Sendoh is deliberately brushing off that question. “We’re pro athletes right? Basketball always comes first. Not everyone understands or accepts that.”

“Date a player,” Sendoh offers. “You’re not picky about gender, are you?”

“Uh…” Mitsui grimaces a bit, but eventually sighs. “I guess not. I don’t know. I don’t really think about…guys…that often.”

“’That often’?” Sendoh presses, hiding his smile. “So you have, before.”

“I mean, I’m not against the idea,” Mitsui hastily says, narrowing his eyes. “You’re going to tell Maki about this, aren’t you? I know you’ve been doing a lot of that.”

Sendoh tries his best to look innocent. “I’m glad we’re sharing things about ourselves, Mitsui-san.”

“Yeah? Then tell me one of your secrets.”

“I’m bi, and I have fucked a player before,” Sendoh tells him, although he doesn’t really think it’s a secret. “Wanna guess who it is?”

Mitsui looks like he can’t decide how he should feel about that. “Is it someone I know?”

Sendoh deliberately shifts his line of sight to the sleeping body, and he can instantly feel Mitsui freeze.

“…Y-you and Rukawa? A-are you serious?” Mitsui whisper-shouts, steadying his hand on the ground in case he wakes Rukawa up. “Since when?”

Sendoh snickers. “I never said it was him. Kaede would bite my dick off and I would like to keep it intact,” he says, grinning wider. “Oh, but I did give him his first kiss.”

“What?!”

It’s loud enough that Rukawa stirs, groggily, and Mitsui fumbles to press that head down quickly, making soothing motions to lull the other back to sleep. Sendoh watches this with an inward raised eyebrow, because what the fuck is that. That’s worse than Sendoh kissing Rukawa once upon a time for fun.

“You know we have a close relationship,” Sendoh teases, patting Mitsui’s back. “Kaede didn’t tell you?”

“Of course he didn’t,” Mitsui furrows his eyebrows. “We don’t talk about things like that.”

“Don’t be jealous, Mitusi-san,” Sendoh adds, relaxed. “This was a decade ago and he made it very clear that he’s not interested in me,” and then he pauses, looking at Rukawa’s turned back. “He is interested in you though.”

As expected, Rukawa shifts, bringing his hand to cover his exposed ear in a show. “Why are you both so fucking noisy,” he grumbles.

“Sorry, sorry, we didn’t mean to wake you,” Mitsui is immediately distracted, trying to placate him, ruffling the top of his head. “Are you feeling better? You still have a couple more minutes before—“

Rukawa waves the hand fusses over him away, pushing himself up to stretch. He sends Sendoh a glare from behind Mitsui’s back which Sendoh reciprocates with a sunny smile.

“Morning, Kaede. Had a good nap?”

“I have a headache,” Rukawa says instead.

“Where? Here?” Mitsui presses his hand against the forehead immediately. “Are you sure you don’t want to go home and rest?” Rukawa only sighs tiredly, pushing the hand away again, and Mitsui stands up. “Wait here, I’ll get some painkillers for you.”

Sendoh waits until Mitsui is fully out of court before he lets himself smile wider. “Your ears are dark red.”

“Fuck you,” Rukawa says, massaging his temples. “You had no right to tell him that.”

“It’s my history too,” Sendoh says, before he gestures Rukawa to come closer.

Rukawa looks at him suspiciously, so Sendoh moves closer to him to press a pressure point at his nape. Rukawa shudders but seems to relax a bit like it helps.

“So…you coming here to sleep on Mitsui-san, how long as this been going on?”

“None of your business,” Rukawa snaps.

“You know that he doesn’t pay attention to anyone like he does with you,” Sendoh continues, unperturbed. “And he seemed thrown off at the thought of you actually being with me. I’d say you have a pretty good chance if you tell him.”

“I said to shut up,” Rukawa hisses. “This may be a game for you but it’s not for me. And I don’t want to talk about it.”

Sendoh closes his mouth at the last sentence. Rukawa looks genuinely pissed off, but that might be because of his head pain—which honestly, Sendoh initially thought he was faking to get Mitsui out of their vicinity.

“Okay,” he answers, more subdued. “Here,” he says quietly, giving Rukawa’s nape a harder pinch, and Rukawa groans. “Well, if you want to talk about it, I’m here for you.”

“…I know,” Rukawa mutters under his breath. “Do that again.”

Rukawa exhales slowly as Sendoh massages the back of his neck near the base of his skull.

“Is your sleeping problem getting worse? I can come with you to the doctor’s,” Sendoh starts.

“No, I just…” Rukawa breathes out quietly. “…you made me think about senpai. So I couldn’t—couldn’t stop. I was fine until you….”

Sendoh stills, because this is definitely the first time that Rukawa—RUKAWA—is admitting something remotely personal.

“Oh,” Sendoh tries to keep calm. “Sorry. I really didn’t mean to fuck it up.”

“I want things to be as they are,” Rukawa says, so softly that Sendoh almost misses it. “So don’t…just don’t.”

“But Kaede,” Sendoh starts, hushed. “I think you could be so happy,” he says sincerely. “He cares so much about you, if he just—“

“No,” Rukawa cuts him off immediately. “It’s enough. I have everything I want. Don’t ruin it for me.”

Sendoh flicks his gaze up when he hears Mitsui’s footsteps squeaking closer.

“Okay,” he agrees. “But I am going to say—I told you so, Kaede,” he grins, teeth showing, as Rukawa kicks him in the shin.

“Is Rukawa feeling alright?”

Sendoh startles a bit when he feels a warm hand on his shoulder. Despite Maki’s bulk, it’s incredible how light his footsteps are that it constantly catches Sendoh off guard. Since Mitsui had dragged Rukawa out of court once practice ended, presumably to go home and rest, Maki had come to get some context.

“Uh yeah,” Sendoh nods. “Why do you ask?”

“He wasn’t playing his best today,” Maki says as he watches Sendoh sort the things in his locker.

“He had a headache this morning, probably from his lack of sleep,” Sendoh tells him. “He did eat some medicine and said he was fine after that.”

“Hm,” Maki pauses. “Just thought you tell me this earlier. What happened to helping me keep tabs on the members?”

Sendoh chuckles. “I…may or may not have been debating if I should tell you about it.”

Maki cocks his head, curious. “What’s the dilemma?”

“It concerns Kaede’s feelings for Mitsui-san.”

“Ah.”

“Hey Captain, why are you walking away?” Sendoh calls at the retreating back.

“I don’t need to know about that, Sendoh,” Maki returns. “Give my best wishes to Rukawa for a quick recovery.”

“Maki-san…” Sendoh pouts, plonking himself on the locker room bench. “Hear me out.”

Maki has an amused smile on as he comes back to sit himself next to Sendoh. “What is it?”

“If you had a friend who was madly in love with this person, and this person would treat them super well, wouldn’t you like them to get together?”

“This is not hypothetical, is it,” Maki replies blandly, and Sendoh just shrugs. “Sure, it’d be nice, but I would respect what my friend choses.”

“That’s so proper,” Sendoh sighs.

“Because there’s a lot to lose,” Maki replies serious. “They’re pro athletes. You know how the press is like.”

“I know, I’m not saying they have to do a public announcement,” Sendoh says. “Just… to be free. Within the team.”

Maki is silent for a few seconds before he asks, “Would you?”

“Would I what?”

“Get together with someone on the team.”

Sendoh first instinct is to laugh, because—Mitsui and Sawakita are definitely not his type, Rukawa has stayed firmly in the friend zone and Sendoh has no intentions of changing that, so that leaves…

“It’s not so easy, now, is it?” Maki continues, oblivious to Sendoh’s brain going on a journey. “Maybe Rukawa treasures the status quo. Maybe he thinks of how it can all go wrong, even if it can go right. It’s important enough that he doesn’t want to risk it, even if we support him. You should respect his choice.”

Sendoh knows. “I know. Do you think this is exactly what Miyagi-san’s thinks too?”

“Who knows,” Maki says. “I’m sure he has his own considerations.”

“Sounds a nightmare,” Sendoh says honestly. “If you can’t be with the person you want… I mean, we just play basketball, for fuck’s sake. I think I would go for it.”

“I agree,” Maki says, surprising Sendoh. “Basketball won’t be here all our lives, but a partner will be. Some things are worth the risk.”

“Huh,” Sendoh blinks consideringly. “Hey Captain, who would you hook up with on the team?”

Maki freezes, then rolls his eyes, making to stand up to grab his bag. “I said ‘get together’, not ‘hook up’.”

“Fuck, marry, or kill—me, Kaede, Mitsui-san.”

“I’m not telling you who’s my favourite.”

“It’s me, right?” Sendoh flashes him a smile.

“Sure,” Maki says easily, which is the most cop out answer ever. “Sendoh, don’t worry about Rukawa. Whether he tells Mitsui or not—Mitsui will treat him just the same.”

“I’m not worrying.”

“Aren’t you?” The corner of Maki’s lips turn up as he gives Sendoh’s nape a slow affectionate stroke before he leaves. “Get some rest. See you tomorrow.”

Sendoh blinks, then blinks again, feeling the phantom caress on the back of his neck. He even reaches to touch the spot, because…damn. Sendoh tries very hard not to think about it.

It’s absolutely not Sendoh’s fault that a month in, Sawakita realises that everyone on the team has heard about his “problem”. This is because Mitsui, the blabber mouth, casually asks how things are going with him and Miyagi, having completely forgotten that Sendoh had related the situation to him in a private cabin of a yacht. This of course, leads to Mitsui bringing Sawakita out for a drink—and the whole team along with them.

They go back the same bar Sendoh and Sawakita went the other time, finding a secluded spot in the corner for Sawakita to spill his updates. (There isn’t any, really.) Rukawa looks like he might kill himself any longer as he listens to Sawakita rambling, but Sendoh soothes him with a fruit juice and some earphones to plug his ears. Maki makes all the appropriate nodding and sympathetic noises while sipping his whisky. Mitsui is on his third beer, slapping Sawakita’s back once in a while in encouragement, while Sawakita has downed many of those martini’s they got the last time. Sendoh is drinking a low-percentage cider this time, because he does not want wear sunglasses to practice tomorrow.

Sendoh finds himself smiling at the scene, because….this is his team. As much as Mitsui and Maki maybe can’t relate to Sawakita as well, they’re trying their best, because they care. And Rukawa could’ve left ages ago, but he’s here, so he cares. A bit. A tiny bit. Sendoh leans into Rukawa’s arm as they are sunk into a squishy couch and tugs out his phone to send Rukawa a text.

I’m bored.

Rukawa remains motionless, so Sendoh takes out his phone from his pocket for him and puts it in his face. Rukawa frowns, annoyed, but he does open the text. He glares at Sendoh and jabs the screen.

Then let’s leave.

Don’t be heartless. Sawakita is spilling his heart out here.

He’s said the same fucking thing for five fucking times.

Love makes him desperate.

Don’t be disgusting.

I’m not the one in love, so I wouldn’t know.

Rukawa tries to kick him, but the couch is too small and it just makes them wobble.

You said you would shut the fuck up.

No, I apologised, but I am definitely not—as you call it—shutting the fuck up. I want to know about your dates with Mitsui-san. I heard you guys went to watch a movie yesterday.

It’s not a date. Long pause. He just wanted company.

He didn’t ask me :( But he asked you :)

He asked Maki-san but Maki-san wasn’t free.

And he didn’t tell me????

What’s your point?

Did you like it?

Rukawa lowers his phone down, giving Sendoh a look before he types slowly. It was okay. There was a lot of screaming.

Wait what are you talking about???

The movie.

Oh…I thought…

Thought what?

Sendoh puts his phone on his chest to mime a fuck with his hands. Rukawa just stares at him flatly and turns his body away. Sendoh chuckles, tugging on Rukawa’s sleeve to turn back, but he doesn’t. So Sendoh returns to the phone typing.

I was just joking.

Rukawa ignores it.

So you liked the date. Why not go on another one? And then make it official?

Sendoh prods him on the back enough times to annoy him to look at his phone again. Rukawa fiddles with it long enough that Sendoh thought he was done for the day, until he gets a message back.

Why don’t you go on a date with Maki-san and leave me alone.

Sendoh frowns, thinking of various ways to answer this but eventually settles with, Maki-san is out my league.

I’ll ask him for you.

Sendoh’s eyes widen in a flurry of panic as he sees Rukawa actually sit up and open his mouth.

“Ma—“

Sendoh immediately clasps his hand tight over Rukawa’s face, nearly poking him in the eye. Everyone suddenly turns to look at them, distracted by the bout of fighting movements on the couch. Sendoh smiles tight, shaking Rukawa subtly to shut up.

“We—uh, we’re going to find the toilet,” Sendoh hastily spits out before dragging Rukawa off the couch and into the nearest corridor.

If Sendoh wasn’t so flustered he would have thought a bit more of why everyone thinks its perfectly normal for him and Rukawa to use the bathroom together. However, that’s the last thing on his mind as he pushes Rukawa against the wall once he noted there was no one around. Rukawa even lets him do it, wearing an expression that’s way too smug than usual.

“What the fuck, Kaede?” Sendoh hisses.

Rukawa scoffs. “Now you don’t want to play your game?”

Sendoh bites his lower lip, furrowing his eyebrows. “…I was just teasing. That’s not the same as—“

“Is it?” Rukawa throws it back to his face before he can even finish, unrepentant. “What’s so different about it? Because your feelings for Maki-san are more special?”

“No,” Sendoh snaps, trying to squash down the irritation that he knows Rukawa is deliberately digging up. “I did not say that. And I did not say I have any type of feelings for Maki-san, you’re just being hurtful—“

“Who’s the coward now,” Rukawa practically growls, folding his arms against his chest just so that Sendoh cannot physically intimidate him by pressing close. “Unlike you, I can admit what I feel about Mitsui-senpai. You’re not even close.”

Sendoh glares, but Rukawa is completely unfazed, sending him an even darker look back. They’re in a tense eyelock for at least a whole minute before Rukawa’s patience runs out and he pushes Sendoh’s chest with an open palm, strong enough for Sendoh to take a step back.

“I need to pee,” Rukawa mutters, turning to stroll down the corridor further, following the signs for the bathroom.

Sendoh exhales, turning to lean his back against the wall until Rukawa comes back. By then, Sendoh has had enough time to process some thoughts.

“How did you know about Maki-san,” Sendoh asks, frowning doubtfully. “I’m not even really…serious…about it.”

Rukawa blinks slowly like Sendoh is stupid. “…You beg for his approval like a dog all the time. It’s pathetic,” he adds, and Sendoh nudges him hard for that remark. “And you always have that look on your face, like the time you tried to kiss me.”

“I did kiss you,” Sendoh corrects, grinning slightly.

Rukawa scowls. “Not the point.”

“I know,” Sendoh sighs, knocking his head back. “Well, it’s not like Maki-san would look my way either. Unlike my situation, Mitsui-san can probably be convinced to be gay for you.”

“We’re not talking about me.”

“You coward,” Sendoh says on purpose. “If you tell Mitsui-san you like him, he’d probably bend over backwards to think about it and give you an answer. Because he cares about you.”

Rukawa rolls his eyes, but there’s a faint redness creeping up his neck. “And you think Maki-san wouldn’t do that for you?” he scoffs. “I think Maki-san would do it for me.”

“Fuck, you’re right,” Sendoh groans, covering his eyes with his hands. “He’s too fucking good a person.”

“So, you are the coward.”

Sendoh grumbles. “You know what, I’ll confess,” he dares, raising his eyebrow. “If you do it to Mitsui-san too.”

Rukawa doesn’t even give it a thought. “I don’t really care about you and Maki-san,” he says. “So no.”

“Kaede,” Sendoh clucks his tongue. “I’m going to tease you about Mitsui-san for life,” he smirks. “When did you first find out about your crush? Was it the summer national’s Sannoh match?“ he starts, and Rukawa narrows his eyes so sharply that the murderous intent is stark. “You started hanging out with him after that, right?”

“None of your business.”

“I’m thinking of all the times you rebuffed me about basketball on the weekend, saying you were busy. You ditched me to play with Mitsui-san, didn’t you?” Sendoh hides his smile. “You could have told me, I wouldn’t have been jealous.”

“You would have been insufferable,” Rukawa replies. “You are,” he knocks Sendoh by the shoulder, which actually fucking hurts. “Just because you’re insecure doesn’t mean you have to take it out on me,” he continues walking, not looking back. “Or else I’ll tell Maki-san.”

“Tell me what?” Maki’s voice intercedes just as they’re turning the corner to get back to the team.

Sendoh freezes in his step, but Rukawa only shrugs and walks off like it’s not his problem. Maki looks at the trailing back in slight question before he turns to Sendoh.

“Are you two okay?” Maki asks, tilting his head. “You were gone for a while, I got worried.”

“Maybe we were making out in the toilet,” Sendoh says in a reflex and immediately regrets it because he can feel Rukawa’s chilly glare from the distance. He forces a chuckle. “Nah, Kaede doesn’t deal well with…listening to Sawakita on end,” he gestures. “He just needed a break.”

“Alright,” Maki relents. “Truth be told, I think I need a break too,” he glances back to the table where Mitsui is patting the Sawakita’s back repeatedly.

“We can pretend to make out in the toilet,” Sendoh replies too fast, inwardly grimacing at himself. “I mean, step out for a breather.”

Maki seems to think it’s a running joke, because he laughs.

“Another drink would suffice,” he says instead, putting his hand on Sendoh’s shoulder for a gentle pat. “See you later.”

Sendoh’s reply diffuses at his lips, because he’s just so mesmerized by the short laugh and tingly sensation on his shoulder. Maki is already steps ahead of him, leaning on the counter and chatting with the staff, but Sendoh is rooted to the spot.

Since Sendoh had joined the team, he’s always known he was attracted to Maki. Maybe even before that, when they crossed paths in high school basketball. Maki was an incredible player and obviously a key person Sendoh strove to beat as a point guard. He had a charismatic charm, was a respected leader, and was so patient too, dealing with the much more rambunctious rookies.

Sendoh thought Maki was genuinely a good person, and that was something truly admirable. That feeling intensified when playing with Maki as a pro; knowing first hand how he shepherds the team, fights for them, cares for them. Even if Maki had pivoted to playing center for a number of years now, Sendoh still thinks Maki is one of the very best point guards there ever was.

Also, the years had been really good to Maki—he is so fucking hot with his chiseled jaw line and tanned abs and that million dollar smile. Not many can lift Sendoh given his height and bulk, but he believes Maki could do it. Plus Maki has that tiny mole near his left eye, the beauty mark…Sendoh has found his gaze drawn to it many a times.

Looking at someone because they’re attractive is very, very normal, and Sendoh has no shame in celebrating it. So he looks, but not too much in case it freaks Maki out, just enough to bring joy in the mundane routine of training.

So it’s very not serious, right?

And then there’s Rukawa insisting otherwise, and Sendoh knows Rukawa is the last person in the world to lie to him. This fondness for Maki had simmered and grown much larger outside of his notice. It’s gotten to the point where he looks at Maki at the bar counter and thinks, I want to bring you home, and that’s when Sendoh knows he’s well and truly fucked.

Sendoh isn’t the type of person to fall in love quickly, if at all. He gets attracted plenty—that’s normal for a young healthy guy. He appreciates the whole plethora of people, so there’s never been a problem about satisfying his needs. But love? He thinks it’s a rather estranged concept to himself, even if he pretends he’s an expert to Sawakita or teasing Rukawa about it.

The closest thing he can think of is more than a decade ago, when he watched Rukawa defiantly slam a dunk after slipping two baskets to him. It was a fairly windy day, blowing Rukawa’s hair around like one of those hair commercials, with the sun set glowing behind him. It was so beautiful, it took Sendoh’s breath away.

As much as Sendoh jokes about it now, he remembers how clumsy and unsure he was, reaching out to Rukawa, who had the most clueless expression on his face, and pressing their clammy lips together. The heat warming his ears and flushing his cheeks was nothing comparable to Rukawa blinking his eyes open slowly, reflecting the pink and orange sun in them.

So beautiful. He wanted to bring that home.

But Rukawa turned him down.

Back then, Sendoh thought it was just Rukawa being Rukawa, the untouchable basketball obsessed prodigy, but now he suspects Rukawa might have already set his sights on someone else. Either way, it changes nothing. Sendoh was disappointed, but that’s just love, right?

It hurts because it’s real.

So after all these years he’s gotten over Rukawa, he’s never felt that same twinge again, not until Maki. It comes when he thinks about the surprised face Maki would give if Sendoh told him. Something like, Hey Captain, I think you’re amazing and I want to kiss you, and Maki would chuckle, thinking it’s one of those silly jokes Sendoh makes. And Sendoh doesn’t want it to be mistaken for a joke. He wants it to be given a real chance, in a world that Maki would actually seriously consider him for all his flaws.

It is pathetic, because he’s thinking about how it’s absolutely going to be a whole fucking disaster. Sendoh is willing to chase after things he really wants, but what he really wants is for the people he loves to be happy.

For Rukawa, or for Maki, or for the team.

Maki is the captain. If Sendoh fucks him up in anyway, the team will be decimated. It’ll be his fault. Sendoh cannot be the one to do that. He would never forgive himself.

And then he hears the echo of Rukawa’s voice, It’s enough, I have everything I want, don’t ruin it for me, and he understands that having something, even if it’s not everything, is infinitely better than nothing at all.

As the weeks pass, he and Rukawa sometimes share a goading look between them, like neither of their stubborn asses will back down. And yet, as the weeks pass, neither of them move forward, leaving the status quo. Sawakita is still in the thrones of his unrequited confession. Mitsui is still blissfully oblivious to his biased fussing over his favorite teammate. Maki is watching them all quietly, making sure none of them are going too insane.

Too bad Sendoh has long perfected the art of letting people believe he is the most normal of them all.

Sawakita is the first to break.

Sendoh can’t say he didn’t see it coming, given that Sawakita is the one most in touch with his emotions after all. He finds Sawakita hiding in the corner of their locker room after a match in which Sawakita had accidentally fouled twice and got sent off court early. Mitsui is crouching down to the depressed figure, trying to offer the other some water. Rukawa had given it a side eye, but even he kicks at Sawakita’s moving figure in a show of his concern. Maki exhales as he stands a step away, hand ruffling through his sweat damp hair. Sendoh sidles up next to him, leaning over to murmur.

“Yesterday, he told me he thought of quitting to travel Okinawa,” Sendoh says under his breath. “I thought he was just being dramatic, and I didn’t want to throw you off before our game,” he continues. “I should’ve told you immediately. Sorry, Maki-san.”

“Not on you,” Maki replies just as quiet, nodding in acknowledgment.

“The press?”

“Coach is dealing with them, we have the space,” Maki says, and then turns to Sendoh. “Honestly, this is very much out of my depth,” he sighs, but makes the stride forward to ask Sawakita if he’s okay.

Sendoh lets himself smile at the sight before he steels himself to join. He makes all the right sympathetic noises as Sawakita apologies amidst frustrated tears for his behaviour. He says all the right things as Sawakita admits his heart is drifting away from playing basketball pro in Japan, given that it’s so different from what he had envisioned. Sendoh even lets Sawakita cry on his shoulder. The other option was Sawakita crying on Mitsui’s shoulder and Sendoh thinks Rukawa would have an aneurysm about it, even if Rukawa is standing further away pretending to be disinterested with his phone.

“Sawakita,” Sendoh pats the short shaven head. “I think it’s time you tell Miyagi-san how you really feel about him. No more room for misunderstandings. This has gone on for long enough, and it’s starting to affect your play.”

“I know,” Sawakita mutters miserably. “I’m sorry. I’m really trying. But I don’t want to push him away. If Ryota hates me, I’ll have nothing left—“

“Miyagi won’t do that,” Mitsui interjects gently. “Look, I ruined his life once and he doesn’t hate me. He’s not that kind of person.”

Sawakita bites his bottom lip, eyes so red from crying that he looks like a good mess. “I don’t want him to feel weird around me. And then he’ll stop texting me, and then we’ll stop being friends, and then—“

Sendoh should be listening, but he’s also distracted by the fact that Maki had moved next to Rukawa and was leaning into Rukawa’s space. Rukawa glances at Maki but says nothing as Maki gives a wry wave to the phone that Rukawa is looking at.

“—lately, I’ve been thinking maybe it’s just better that we stay as friends,” Sawakita continues to ramble. “I mean, Rukawa was right, I’m just being selfish, pushing my feelings unto Ryota who didn’t ask for it. I need to deal with this on my own—“

Sendoh refrains from saying that Sawakita had been doing that for the past months and clearly failing, but also, what the hell are Rukawa and Maki looking at in Rukawa’s phone that’s so interesting—

“Have you heard enough, Miyagi-senpai?” Rukawa states loud enough to make Sawakita pause mid-sentence.

“…Uh…yeah…” comes a scratchy voice from the phone, but it’s unmistakably Miyagi. “Give the phone to Eiji, please.”

“You call him,” Rukawa says, and then taps something on the screen and puts his phone back into his pocket.

Sendoh, and everyone, stares in silence in their circle for a good few seconds until a catchy tune rings from one of the bags leaning against the locker doors. Sawakita scrambles, almost diving to yank the zip open, and digs out his phone. He clutches it with both hands, like it’s a bomb.

“It’s Ryota,” he says, eyes wide. “What do I do?”

Rukawa points to the toilets without a pause, and Sawakita scampers off with it pressed to his ear. Sendoh is mildly disappointed that Sawakita goes far enough that he can’t eavesdrop anymore, but he is more concerned with prodding Rukawa on what the fuck just happened.

“None of you are actually doing anything about it,” Rukawa says flatly. “So I told Miyagi-senpai and made him listen to Sawakita’s whining.”

“He’s delicate,” Sendoh says, shaking his head. “If Miyagi-san really rejects him—“

“Then he’ll get over it,” Rukawa concludes. “I’m going to shower.”

Sendoh shouldn’t be surprised at this is how Rukawa operates, but he also cannot believe it’s over, just like that. Mitsui scratches his head for a bit before giving up to shower himself as well.

“You waved to Miyagi-san,” Sendoh says to Maki, who was taking his towel from the locker. “You knew he was listening.”

“It’ll be alright, Sendoh,” Maki replies. “Go take a shower.”

Sendoh takes a goddamn long shower. When he comes out, Rukawa is sitting on one of the benches, scrolling through his phone. He knows that just a front for waiting for people. Mitsui is toweling his hair dry, making light chat with Maki, when Sawakita suddenly shuffles back in, looking sheepish.

“Uh,” he starts, “I’m…going to Okinawa.”

Sendoh blinks.

“As in, not permanently!” Sawakita adds hastily. “Just—just to see Ryota and talk it out in person,” he rushes, faintly blushing. “I think, I think he d-does like me,” he stutters. “I think. I promise I will be back before the next match,” he bows deeply to Maki. “Please let me take the week off, Captain!”

“Do it right, Sawakita,” Maki nods. “I expect you will be back in top condition next week.”

“Yes, sir!” Sawakita beams, and then trips over himself trying to collect his bag. “I, I need to catch my flight.” Before he leaves, he gives everyone a tight hug—Sendoh relents even though he gets soaked with Sawakita’s sweat, while Rukawa desperately leans out of the touch—“I love you all so much,” he says, almost crying again. “This the best team, I swear I’ll come back!”

“Good riddance,” Rukawa says to the thin air as Sawakita runs out of the door.

“You say that, but you called Miyagi-san for him,” Sendoh says wryly.

“Because he won’t shut up,” Rukawa mutters.

“Oh I know you care,” Sendoh pokes him on the cheek to which Rukawa scowls.

“I’m leaving.”

Sendoh grins, skipping after Rukawa. He glances behind just to see Maki and Mitsui following them at a slower pace.

“You know,” he leans towards Rukawa with a lowered voice. “You could put that same energy to Mitsui-san,” he spies Rukawa rolling his eyes. “But just as well, I give up on Maki-san. So we’re even.”

Rukawa abruptly stops and turns to look at him. “I told Mitsui-senpai. We’re not the same.”

“Wait, what?” Sendoh blinks. “When?”

“A month ago,” Rukawa says very perfunctory.

“I…I don’t believe you,” Sendoh says finally, because…what?

Rukawa raises one eyebrow, and then calls, “Mitsui-senpai.”

By this time, Mitsui and Maki had caught up close enough with them.

“Huh? What is it?” is what Mitsui manages to say before Rukawa grabs the collar of his shirt and kisses him.

Like, a full, on the mouth kiss.

Sendoh’s eyebrows has never risen so high in his life. He stares, and he even meets Maki’s surprised gaze for a split second before Rukawa releases Mitsui from the lip lock. Mitsui is completely flushed, hand pressed over his mouth.

“—wha? What was that for?” Mitsui demands. “There could be people around!”

“There isn’t,” Rukawa says back.

“Wait,” Sendoh inserts, because this is his time. “You guys got together? And you didn’t tell me?” he emphasizes.

“I’m telling you now,” Rukawa shrugs.

“But…” Sendoh falters. “Why didn’t you tell me when it happened?”

“Because I wanted to see if you would back out first,” Rukawa says. “And you did, you coward.”

Sendoh frowns.

“By the way, Maki-san,” Ruakwa continues, like he’s talking about the weather, “Sendoh likes you.”

It happens so fast that Sendoh doesn’t react to it. He sees Rukawa grabbing Mitsui’s hand to stalk away. He sees the half wave Mitsui gives to him while being dragged off. He sees Maki looking at him in concern. All of this happens, and Sendoh is still struggling to process what the fuck Rukawa has done.

“Sendoh?” Maki shakes his shoulder lightly. “Are you alright? You look like you need to sit down.”

Oh, Sendoh does need to sit down, alright. He stares at the floor for a second before plopping down, palms pressed to the ground as he closes his eyes briefly.

“You knew, about them?” is the first thing he says.

Maki crouches down to be at his level. “…Mitsui told me.”

“I see. So…everyone in the team is gay, huh.”

Maki snorts. “Like you didn’t know this.”

“Well, I don’t really know about you,” Sendoh says quite seriously. “And if I make you uncomfortable…I can quit the team.”

“No one is quitting,” Maki replies just as seriously. He moves to do a full proper sit, moving his legs underneath him. “Let me say something first, is that okay?”

“Sure.”

“I know that you look at me.” Sendoh involuntarily feels his neck flush, because—fuck. Maki smiles a bit, making the flush feel hotter. “But I didn’t think you were serious, because I thought you would say something if you wanted more. Also, the last time, I read it wrong, so…”

Sendoh furrows his eyebrows. “What last time?”

“You suggested that we should do something together,” Maki relates, not quite looking Sendoh in the eye. “I thought it was a date, but you were concerned for the team, and rightly so—“

“The yacht?” Sendoh mutters, disbelievingly. “You—I…I could’ve been on that yacht with you, alone?”

“I thought you weren’t interested so I let it go. Anyway, it was nice with the team, so it’s okay—“

“It’s not fucking okay,” Sendoh says, barely breathing. “I—….fuck, Maki-san,” he almost laughs. “I went home and dreamt about it. That you would actually want to—to…do this. With me.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Maki looks curious.

“You’re the captain,” Sendoh peers at him sideways. “You’re…you’re the pillar. We can’t do it without you. I’m not usually shy with what I want, but when it comes to you, Maki-san…” he trails off. “It could go so wrong, even if it could go right.”

Maki hums. “Didn’t you say you would go for it nonetheless? That we just play basketball?”

“I lied,” Sendoh says with a wry smile.

Maki nods for a bit. “I didn’t,” he says finally. “Maybe that’s not being a good captain, but I don’t want to live a life with regrets. But I’ll respect your choice, Sendoh. You don’t have to worry.”

“Are you kidding me, Maki-san?” Sendoh exhales, almost on the verge of laughter. “As if I can go back after knowing you would’ve gone on a date with me. I want to go on the yacht again.”

“Pack your fishing gear,” Maki says. “I’ll pick you up in the morning.”

Sendoh lets himself smile—he’s sure it hasn’t really sunk in yet—and pushes himself up to stand. As Maki dusts himself off, Sendoh pauses in thought.

“…I can’t believe you actually like me.”

“Didn’t I tell you?” Maki sounds fond. “You’re my favourite.”