Chapter Text
“When have I ever moped? I don’t even know how to.”
Tim has a theory, very well functioning backed by proof theory. Evolution happened, algae became fish, fish became a weird land animal, something became a monkey and after evolution within the monkey, they reached humans. Capable of changing the world humans. But evolution created diversity, uniqueness, individuality, different patterns, different emotions. Some were given every feeling gene in the world, like Lucy, capable of feeling cats agony, saying sorry to tables after getting hit by them. Some retained the old features, less emotion genes, like Tim. Pain, anger, sadness, surprise, disgust, disappointment, the basics were served to him on the platter. He isn’t complaining though, he doesn’t want to apologize to coffee tumblers if they fall down the stairs like his aide. He is happy to cross arms, raise eyebrows, smirk and express purely through stares. Moping isn’t possible for him, even scientifically, he is simply not that generation. Lucy, couldn’t be farther away from the truth, his DNA recoils against whimpers and breakups misery. Oh a second though, Lucy has actually gone a lot far away, they are supposed to pick pizza together.
5 times Tim mope, you take a guess for whom. Presenting moping Tim and Reason Lucy.
One
Tim will deny it even at gun point. He already has enough collection of Lucy’s covering the whole face grins, and too many Kojo’s dad references. But Kojo saved him, Kojo made survival possible for him. A few more weeks, and instead of rating with loneliness, the silence would have eaten him. The routine of game, eat, shower, duty, repeat was slowly hollowing him, his threads of attention barely holding together. As much as his duty kept him alive and joyous, it ended, his life as a cop ended after removing the blue uniform. He needed a reason to go back home, even if it was a heavy puppy, who scratched and chewed all his shoes useless. He needed a reason to go out on Sundays, although chasing squirrels and flies kind of feels like a reason to not go out, it feels nice to say, oh I have got someone waiting for me at home. It was a start, a ray of hope, a possibility of happiness and ideal life after Isabel. Tim doesn’t buy that I adopted him to get over Caleb's excuse for a minute. Tim is absolutely sure, Lucy raised the puppy from day one of birth, or created the fetus in a test tube and copy pasted her DNA into the brown pup’s soul. Kojo was sent for the sole purpose to imitate his mother, Lucy Chen and create as much trouble as the chatter did in the day. He even gave the same glares, she did when he cancelled plans on the phone. Kojo was a spy, a loyal paw to the true evil and chaos of this universe, Lucy Chen. On more than one occasion, Tim has felt he is being simply tolerated, talked to, visited or acknowledged, because of the brown fur next to him, wagging his tail like he doesn’t see her every two days. Conspirators. Mother and Son. However, he will have to scold this mother for diverting her attention away from the job, even if it's a really stupid video of their son.
“ Chen.”
“Bingo! You guessed my last name correctly! You win the show!”
“Anyone tell you , you are funny?”
“No, they usually tell me how funny you are.”
“Ha-ha. Look at me dying of laughter. “
“What do you want?”
“Your attention.”
“Tim, I have told you, we are just friends. Stop the eye glare.”
“Say that again and we would do a friendly match of pushups in between calls. Stop watching stupid dog videos on your phone. Pay attention.”
“The most happening thing that happened to us today was two kids fighting with a water gun, because the water gun gear was awesome. It is a slow day, just chill.”
“That doesn’t mean you get to be lousy Chen.”
“It is five minutes to lunch, just drive to our taco place. And to share the joke with the audience, I was laughing at this video. Look at this cute little hashbrown, trying to type something on the laptop. Adorable.”
“Kojo has never done this.”
“Kojo would throw the laptop out of the door. I still have lessons from letting him near cables.”
“You are surfing the internet for puppy videos, get a life Chen.”
“I have a life and Friday plans that don’t involve watching the game on Friday. This little one is called cookie. He just moved into my building. I got a moving into building present from his owner Kai and he just followed through.”
It has to be the smelly onions and the gangsters. It has to be the rowdy teenagers spoiling Tim’s lunch by deciding to test his limits, turns out LAPD can very well arrest you for simply yelling motherfuckers at officers. On top of dealing with angsty teenagers, Tim also dropped his lunch and the shop closed before he could order one. What else could be the reason for his foul mood?
“Officer Chen , something you want to share with the rest of us? Perhaps the criminals are personally calling you on your phone to tell you the crimes they will commit.”
“No sir, sorry.”
“What’s gotten to him?”
“The day I can tell that Nolan; will be the day I will get myself a trophy and a mind reading lesson. He is Tim, he could be pissed at someone adding extra sugar to his coffee. Which is really just one spoon of sugar.”
“No, he is grumpier than usual. He is into, do you want to add something to your blue page officer mood.”
“Well happy, sad, grumpy, moping, ecstatic, the honor to bear the mood swings is all mine. I better ready the shop or I am sure the entire precinct will see me getting fired.”
Later
“Look, Kai sent me another video this time. Cookie is watching ‘crazy asians.’ That will be one well groomed and cultured dog. And oh my god, in the morning he brought me coffee, like all by himself. I got a butler, Aaron. The cutest barking butler. “
“That’s it. Enough.”
“Woah, Tim, relax. What is it with you today?”
“I need my officers looking out to stop robberies, terrorism, crime, not stand like two married ladies and gush about dogs who can do basic functions like hold a cup of coffee.”
“We were just leaving. I even set out for the shop, we were just saying hi to each other.”
“How about I give you more time? That’s it, you are doing the cavity searches for next week.”
“TIM!”
One, two, three. Tim knows he is being irrational and unfair. It is not Lucy’s fault her neighbour has a dog, and he should know better than to separate Mama Lucy with her puppies. Fuck, she makes him sometimes make random stops to visit the adoption centre, ofcourse she is going to be enamoured with a dog living next door, it might be the one thing making her feel safe again. He needs to calm down. He needs to extend the olive branch out. And he has the perfect plan for it.
Tim: Your dog is gay. Here’s him choosing the most colorful butterfly themed leash when super cool rangers are right next. You better have enough savings for the therapy.
Lucy: Hello Daddy Bradford.
Tim: I would purposely throw you in a lake for this. In December.
Lucy : Hello Kojo’s daddy Bradford.
Tim: You’re the absolute worst.
Lucy: And you love it. Plus he is not gay. He just has a good taste.
Tim: It's okay Kojo, if she won’t support you, I will.
Lucy: Support? You would take him to the pride rally? With glitter eyeshadows? OH MY GOD, WE WOULD GET YOU A SHIRT MADE. MY SON IS GAY.
Tim: He is going to conversion therapy.
Lucy: That’s not cool Tim. Bad Dad.
Tim: Shut up.
Lucy: YOU TEXTED ME.
Tim: STOP YELLING AT ME.
Lucy: NO.
Tim: Ugh. Whatever. Are we still going to hike tomorrow morning ? I think Kojo might burst if we delay it anymore.
Lucy: Actually-
Tim: LUCY
Lucy: I am really sorry, you know I hate cancelling on you guys. But I did an impromptu hike with Kai and cookie today. I am just so tired, I wanted to sleep in tomorrow.
Tim: It's fine. I will take Kojo.
Lucy: I am so sorry Tim. See, even Cookie wants to say sorry.
Photo attached.
Tim: You are not at home?
Lucy: Just having dinner with Kai, next door. I am really sorry, I swear I will make it up to you guys.
Seen
“Not now Kojo, not now. I never thought you would make me a child of divorce between you and your Mom. We don’t need her to have fun. We absolutely don’t need her. In fact, we are going to show her how much fun she will not be a part of. Lets bake some fucking cookies.”
Him and Kojo do end up having a blast, Tim can find Kojo cute on his own. He can find amusements in butterflies runs, shoes sniffles and I am a dog but I cannot walk anymore tantrums. It is the heaviness of the day and the rockiness of the path. It is the pain of pointed toes putting him to sleep, not brown eyes and rookie abandoning him, not his heart pinning, not his sadness partying.
Self preservation. Prevention is better than cure. It is purely an act of self -preservation, a decision made on grounds of facts and tactical training. No emotions have swayed Tim in his decade of policing and none shall begin the feat now. His decision to ride with Celina is to create an opportunity of learning, to create another capable officer for the office. And it would help him the most in the future, right? Good decision, sergeant. The decision has nothing to do with a neighbour of a certain hasbrown that sounds confused at the declaration. He is not choosing not to ride with Lucy. He is simply choosing Celina. Hell, he is estimating Celina. Tim Tests are going to have a field day today.
“Just randomly?”
“I didn’t know there was a compulsory billboard notice I had to calligraph before interacting with my juniors. I am simply judging Nolan’s capabilities.”
“Is there trouble in paradise? Did you have a fight with Lucy? Just say sorry. Is this why you have been moving around like a kicked puppy the last few days? Apologise Tim and make happiness your friend again.”
“Detectiveness doesn’t suit you Lopez. And why would I need to say sorry?”
“So it is something with Lucy, it's common to say it out loud. If a five year old felt better, you cannot be that emotionally constipated.”
“Stop mothering me. And as I said I am fine. FINE. I don’t let the lines blur. I don’t watch my neighbour’s dog videos hysterically on repeat 5 times. I am normal.”
“Oh my god. You are moping because of a dog.”
“Go revisit school. I am not moping. I am simply doing my duty. And not abandoning my pet that I got in the first place.”
“I wish someone documented this stuff. Hulu could make me a billionaire.”
Later
“I cannot keep it in me any longer.”
“What?”
“I just have to ask, Sir.”
“Never been a fan of riddles.”
“Why are you so sad? And angry? And again, sad?”
“How about you give me the talking feelings pillow? JUST DO YOUR JOB BOOT.”
“Sorry, it’s just your aura is so gloomy, like a thunderstorm aftermath. Always dripping, always hiding the sun. Damp. Chilly. Green but with a wisp of black. I feel sad just by association.”
“Good job Tennyson. Might we nominate you for the Nobel prize yet.”
“I just meant to help, you can share things with me, like I am a stranger.”
“And this is a 1970s black and white movie?”
“It really helps. My mom told me when I was five, if you won’t say it, how will I get it? Simple, but really talking helps.”
“You know what really helps? Deep breaths. How about I take 50 and you do push-ups in between.”
Later
“Still want to discuss the rainbowness of my aura?”
“No sir.”
“You live with Lucy right?”
“Yes sir.”
“How is the building?”
“Uh old, but her apartment is warm. In fact one of the best adjectives to describe it is , Lucy. It is simply very Lucy. There ! Finally one ray of yellow in the aura. A simmer. And it is gone. Sorry!”
“Is it safe?”
“Ofcourse, Lucy has already computed all the variables. She wouldn’t rest without making sure everything is good.”
“I know that Officier, I am simply getting to know you. Small talk, brush up on your communication skills.”
“With me? You?”
“Is there a ghost in this shop as well?”
“No Sir. But why the sudden interest in the apartment?”
“There is no interest. Small talk. Keep it small.”
“Oh okay, how was your weekend? Never really chatted with you on personal stuff like that. “
“Good. Now how are your neighbours?”
“Uh, they are neighbors? We don’t interact with them much. You know the job comes with little social time.”
“You don’t interact with them?”
“Not really, no.”
“Anyone new on the floor?”
“Is this about someone or something? What was the Lucy analogy, is this a Tim Test?”
“It is me being polite to you, officer. Don’t make me regret it.”
“Yeah, the neighbourhood is ordinary. As safe as it gets in this city. Having a fellow officer helps.”
“Any changes? Any new person living on your floor? Pets? “
“People keep moving in and out. It is LA after all.”
“It is important to assess your neighbors for security threats. Pets can cause hazards. Is your building even pet safe? Or you are just ignoring the situation because some dog learnt a trick from the internet? Is your new neighbour a flirt? Is he using his dog to get into your home and possibly find out about your police work? So many situations. A good officer never shuts the cop's eyes.”
“Well, yeah, pets and dogs jog something to the memory. We got a new chef across from our apartment, with the cutest little companion, Cookie. True to his name, he brought freshly baked cookies for us as a welcoming gift. Lucy was the one who received them. Immediately enamoured, you know her soft spot anyway. And then she got chatting with Kai, the chef. By the way, apparently they had a lot in common. I met them the next day, coming home from a morning run. Such a good, kind hearted person. And god so funny, I don’t think I or Lucy laughed that much ever. That was some day. I don’t want to jinx it, but Kai is pretty much the perfect neighbour. “
“And does Kai have a wife, girlfriend or partner?”
“Nope, not that I have heard of. Plus I don’t think there will be any in the future.”
“Why?’
“Cause I caught him checking out a firefighter yesterday?”
“Kai is Gay?”
“No, Kai is a woman. She. Kai is a she. Hey, your aura cleared up! “
“Shut up, Officer Juarez. And let’s remain shut up now all day.”
Next day
“What are you doing here?”
“Hello to you too Daddy Bradford.”
“ I hate you. Every nerve.Every cell. Every breath.”
“Aw, who says you are not a romantic. Move now, I want cuddles from my fur baby.”
“Your fur baby is busy ruining my bedsheets. And getting me up for breakfast in bed. The baby is a punishment for all my sins.”
“Stop, this is how children get issues.”
“You got him with issues.”
“TIM! Fine, it will be me and him against the sod old lad. “
“Your creativity amuses me. Where will you be ?”
“In the woods. Against the birds and the trees. Wandering. Finding truth, Finding love.”
“And weird dolls.”
“How come they always look possessed? What if some of them were actually possessed?”
“ would explain why you talk for three people.”
“Rude, no muffins for you.”
“You are empty handed.”
“You were kind of supposed to make those muffins. While me and Kojo do the world’s most epic trail.”
“Kindness becomes you. Why sudden plans ?”
“I missed Kojo.”
“You recently got a very foolish replacement for him.”
“Hush! There is no replacement for my best boys. Plus my cables need to be messed up, I love my child with everything. Cookie was good, but Kojo is the conqueror of my heart.”
“I will keep him free on Valentine's day.”
“Plus the whole department wants to kill you. You are the evil stepmother. Blue pages here and there. Scowls like charity. Glares that make juniors quit. They need the storm to pass. Get over moping Tim.”
“I am not singing praises for monkeys who don’t even know to do the job properly for a second.”
“Common Tim, we went over this. My awesomeness washed over you. We created a better likeable version of you. Has something really happened ? Everything is alright?”
“It is. Now. I will give the freakiest smiles, ask how the children are doing. “
“Charming. And oh, I got some mind blowing news. Like you couldn’t think of it even with sixteen lives. I got asked out!”
“Yeah I cannot imagine anyone doing that voluntarily. And since when is this love island?”
“Please, you would die without my gossip. And as much as you love to make a long face, you are interested in my love life. But you wouldn’t guess who asked me out? Actually, I cannot wait any longer. Kai did. Lucy charms take it all.”
“Tim, why are you making that angsty face?”