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Sakura would like it to be known that he did not want to be here. So this is very much not on him, and is in fact entirely the fault of Nirei, who dragged him along insisting it would be fine, and Suo, who simply smiled innocently when Sakura turns his questioning gaze on them. He knew this was dumb, and he didn’t want any part in it.
Yet, here he is, being subject to the vomit-inducing PDA that is his two closest friends in their honeymoon phase. It’s been almost a month now; Sakura is pretty sure they should be over that shit at this point, but they’re still as annoying as they were on day one. Actually, they’re still as annoying as they were in the pining phase, which is saying something, because Sakura literally bonded with Sugishita, of all people, complaining about how sickening it was.
He glowers as Suo tenderly wipes a drop of ice cream from Nirei’s chin with their thumb. He sincerely hopes Suo can feel every dagger he’s glaring at them right now digging into their back. They’re insufferable. Sakura is going to find new friends. Maybe Nirei can stay, as long as it’s only him, but Suo has got to go—they’re definitely the bigger problem here. Nirei is practically a ray of sunshine, and Suo is a sly bastard who doesn’t deserve him.
“You’re so messy, Nire-kun,” they tease before lifting their hand to their mouth. Their tongue darts out from between their lips, cleaning their thumb with kitten licks and maintaining eye contact with Nirei all the while.
Nirei flushes, cheeks flaming red. “O-oh!” He ducks his head. “Thank you, Suo-san.”
Suo’s smile softens, which should be impossible, because they were already gazing at Nirei with an expression so tender it was downright embarrassing for Sakura to exist in the vicinity of. They lean in, pressing a kiss to the corner of Nirei’s mouth. Sakura half-expects Nirei’s hand to go slack and for his ice cream to drop out of his cone like they’re in some shitty TV show. Thankfully, he manages to keep the ice cream cone upright.
Small mercies, Sakura supposes. He slurps his slushie loudly, hoping that will remind his friends they invited him along too, but it doesn’t seem to work. Because Suo only turns their head slightly, kissing Nirei’s lips before pulling away to ask, “Could I try some of yours?”
Nirei nods mutely, holding the cone up towards Suo. They wrap their hand around Nirei’s, guiding the ice cream towards their mouth. They lick slowly, and Sakura hopes they have an allergic reaction to it, so they can suffer exactly how Sakura himself is right now.
Unfortunately, they do not immediately start swelling up or coughing or sneezing or even form a spontaneous rash. Curse fate for never being on Sakura’s side.
They look over to Sakura, smile shifting from soft to teasing. “Is something the matter, Sakura-kun?”
Sakura, practically vibrating from his irritation and digging his fingers into his cup so hard it’s a surprise he hasn’t cracked it yet, tells them, through gritted teeth, “No. I’m fine.”
Suo frowns, the perfect picture of innocence, though Sakura knows it is nothing more than a bold-faced lie. “Are you jealous? I can kiss you too, if you’d like.”
Sakura is going to kick Suo in the balls.
Before he can, though, Nirei cuts in with a genuine, “Suo-san, don’t tease him.” He looks at Sakura, so earnest that Sakura’s anger dissipates. “I’m sorry, Sakura-san. We’ll stop.”
Sakura does not believe Suo will stop for even half a second. They get off on being the most annoying person on the planet.
But with Nirei’s wide eyes on him, all Sakura can find it in himself to say is a gruff, “Whatever,” before he turns away.
There are some whispers he doesn’t catch behind him, and when he throws a glance over his shoulder, he finds Suo with their hand resting on the small of Nirei’s back as they murmur something in his ear. Nirei is smiling at them, unaware of the melted ice cream spilling onto his hand until Suo procures a napkin and helps him clean it away.
And—
Okay.
Maybe Sakura is a little happy for his friends.
They’re still damn annoying, though, so he’ll die before he admits it to their faces.