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Both bodies and lips entwined, the older stallions found themselves gripped by their moment of passion. The stalwart white stallion, Captain of His Guard and Ruler of His Land, took immediate dominance over his creamsicle concubine. The orange stallion immediately submitted, mewling and relenting under the sheer masculinity of the stallion against him.
Their lips parted briefly.
“Oh Sunburst- I love you and your stupid gay rat tail!” Shining Armor said as thier horns met, pink magic emanating. “I could kiss your nerdy face all day long!”
“Oh Shining Armor, you’re so masculine and virile!” Sunburst uttered, a flame of passion in his eyes. “Let’s be gay furry yaoi forever!!”
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Sunburst didn’t know whether he should be shocked, concerned, or afraid.
It was supposed to just be a simple game of hide-and-seek with Flurry Heart. Mind you, he might have been cheating by hiding in her parents’ room, a place she’d been told many times to never sneak into under any circumstances, but as Royal Crystaler he figured part of his job was teaching her that sometimes adults don’t play fair.
But hiding is boring work, so he felt he’d pass the time by reading some of the literature Princess Cadance and Shining Armor kept in their room. Even if said literature was kept in a locked drawer.
And now?
Well, the phrase ‘gay furry yaoi forever ’ was bouncing around in his mind too much to even think of the present.
It distracted him so much, he didn’t notice the closed door opening behind him.
“Sunburst, what are you doing with my notebook?”
Caught red-hoofed, Sunburst spun around with a journal entitled ‘ Cadance’s Secret Ship Journal ’ still in the golden grasp of his magic. Though the journal quickly dropped to the ground as he looked at the towering Cadance in horror.
There was a long pause as Sunburst tried to figure a cover for his snooping.
“Well… why were you writing about me and Shining kissing?!” Sunburst asked, opening the book to the page and tapping his hoof against the lurid words.
As if hearing his name called, Shining Armor entered the room behind his wife. “Sunburst, Flurry is gathering my guards to mount a search party. I think you won hide-and-seek.”
“Well apparently your guards aren’t the only thing mounting something!” Sunburst cried, loudly enough the castle might have heard. “Your wife is writing smut of us!”
Upon hearing this, Shining Armor took a deep breath and shut the door behind him before turning to look at his wife. “What, I give you one bad review and suddenly you find a new editor?”
Princess Cadance rolled her eyes, flicking her husband with a hoof. “Honey, Sunburst isn’t editing, he’s snooping . And doing an awful job at it.”
Sunburst blinked, then squinted as he looked over his glasses at Shining. “Wait, you knew about this? Does that mean you…” Eyes widening in horror, he reached up to his wizardly facial hair. “Does that mean you both think my beard is dumb?”
“Sunburst, it may make you look adorable, but it’s objectively not a good look.” Cadance said with a sigh, but then pressed a hoof to her chin. “Although I guess it could be useful if Shining tugs on it while you-”
“Cadance!” Shining warned before turning to Sunburst with an apologetic expression. “But, uh, maybe try either growing it out or just getting rid of it. The in-between just kind of sucks.”
While Sunburst comforted his bruised ego, Shining Armor wrapping a friendly hoof around him as both apology and comfort, Princess Cadance tossed her hair with a soft sigh.
“Really Sunburst, it’s none of your business what I do in my private time. Especially when you have to snoop to find it.” Giving the dorky stallion in her husband’s tight embrace a once-over, Cadance smiled softly. “Though maybe if you weren’t the most breedable twink I’ve ever met, I wouldn’t be tempted to write you in such compromising positions.”
Eyebrows furrowed, Sunburst reeled back at the accusation. He was suddenly glad to have Shining Armor’s masculinely muscular foreleg around him to hold him back lest he do something rash like stomp on the journal he’d pilfered. But damaging literature, no matter how bawdy, wouldn’t be getting him anywhere.
“I’ll have you know I’m neither a twink, nor am I breedable!” Sunburst cried as he stomped a hoof. He then raised the hoof to push his glasses up with a self-satisfied smirk. “In fact, all of the mares I’ve been with before found me… quite dominant.”
Both Cadance and Shining couldn’t help but laugh, causing Sunburst to lower his head with a frown. Shining Armor at least pat his shoulder gently to try and cheer him up.
“Sunburst, you give off so much Wet Cat energy that it’s almost scary. A stiff breeze could knock you over.” Princess Cadance said, fighting back another laugh as she gestured between her husband and Sunburst. “And I mean…”
At that, Sunburst looked up at the stalwart stallion who continued to embrace him still. “Seriously, how are you okay with all of this?”
“I just don’t see anything wrong with her writing about two of Equestria’s straightest stallions having a good time.” Shining said with a simple shrug. “It’s not like we’d do it for real.”
There was a long, mpregnant pause.
Then Princess Cadance began to laugh. Even harder than she had before.
It was a laugh that lasted so long that Shining and Sunburst looked at each other in concern.
“I… think we should go.” Sunburst said, stroking his dumb little goatee.
“Probably for the best.” Shining Armor nodded. “Wanna go make shadow puppets for Flurry?”
The two stallions turned to leave the laughing mare behind, letting the door shut between them. As it swung shut, however, Princess Cadance reached down with her magic and picked up the discarded journal, flipping to a page entitled ‘ Prince and Pauper ’ with a widening grin.
“Let’s see… ‘Step Five: The Love Journal Gambit ’... Check.”