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Andddddd there! I should be on time, right?
An snatched her phone from its designated pocket in her school blazer. The screen bloomed with white light as it came to life, the numbers on the home screen displaying the date and time. February 13th. 8:23am. Score! Even if I’m off hall monitor duties today, being late would be a bad look. Her eyes scanned the subdued surroundings of Kamiyama High: many students had yet to arrive, and countless others were trudging through the gateway, directing their gigantic yawns towards their mittened hands.
I totally get it. When it gets cold like this, crawling out of bed is rooooough. An tilted her head to the porcelain blue sky, unmarred by clouds. A scattering of sunlight refracted off the clumps of snow sprinkled over the high school’s hedges, trees, and pathways, creating an atmosphere that would have been magical, if not for the frigid temperature. Spring’s warmth, however, would arrive before long.
And it won’t be long before Valentine’s Day, too!
Given the equipment and ingredients she could borrow from WEEKEND GARAGE, there was no better or easier way for An to celebrate the sweet occasion than by whipping up surprise chocolates for her teammates. Kohane mentioned that she likes any type of chocolate! So, a milk-white mix for her. And I only ever see Toya eating that bitter, dark chocolate flavoured stuff…so I’ll put together a type of truffle!
… But Akito? Her bouncy steps slowed. I have no clue what he’d like…
Which leaves us with An’s current predicament, and the reason as to why, despite being early, she had not yet entered her designated homeroom: she had a target. And said target’s whereabouts thoroughly stumped her. Where could he be…She flipped her head over and over, scrutinizing each tree, analyzing every bench, for a sign of orange. There’s no way he’s in class. I would’ve seen him through the window…AHA!
Brushing past a pair of chattering students and yelping a quick apology, An thundered towards the sitting area, a common spot for lunch, meetups, and, evidently, writing. For there, with a notebook balancing precariously atop his crossed knee, fingers toying with a chewed on pencil, and eyes slanted, consternation apparent, sat Akito, unmovable as a granite statue.
Hm? What’s he thinking about? Unconsciously, An halted, watching Akito’s face. Homework? But the test was yesterday. Is he still moping about bombing it? Seeing the boy in a state of deep thought was an unusual sight for the girl. It brought about a sensation of wonder, like watching an animal in the midst of an unfamiliar, absurd trick.
And, to An’s immediate regret, the curtains abruptly fell on the performance. Akito snapped the notebook shut at the sound of footsteps, the tall, straight frame of Toya’s body coming into view beside him. The honour student tilted his two toned hair, mouth opening to shape what was likely a question. In reply, Akito merely shrugged, slipping the notebook in his pocket before standing up, matching Toya’s long stride towards the school doors.
Wait, crap! He’s leaving- ugh…Drooping over like a plant with no water, An bit her lip as their silhouettes retreated inside. And I didn’t even get to ask him about the chocolates…
Plus, what was that he was working on? It kinda seems like he was hiding it.
As if sensing her despair, a pair of female students drifted past, bubbly voices raised in excitement as one remarked, “Valentine’s Day is almost here! Be honest with me, have you prepared anything yet?”
“Nope…” admitted the other, with less enthusiasm and more bashfulness. “But I will soon! I still have two days to whip something up for the boy I like.”
“Wow! You’re going to confess to him? You go, girl!”
Those words, simple, reassuring, not even intended for her, were like rainfall after a drought, and An straightened with new resolve. That’s right! I have time! I swear I’ll ask him today. And then, I’ll make them. She grinned, and pulled her hand into a fist. The perfect chocolates!
…But first. Lunch! Homeroom class, as always, nearly put An to sleep. Upon failing to pay proper attention and answer the questions directed her way correctly, she had been subjected to a firm lecture. It’s not my fault derivatives make my head hurt, AND make me sleepy! The amount of brain power she channeled into understanding the equations and symbols would not go without reward. And so, she clapped her hands over the bento box, placed on the cafeteria table. “Thank you for the food!”
The surrounding cafeteria noise drowned out her hearty exclamation. Laughter. Insults. Utensils hitting plastic. The density of students was the result of the outside cold, with scant few electing to use the courtyard as their eating location. And that included Akito.
With a piece of broccoli poking out of her mouth, An slid her vision across the room. There he was. His lunchbox, school supplies, and, once again, the strange notebook, were all placed before him. The legs of his chair rocked up and down as he idled, eyes fixed on the ruled paper, like a man hypnotized.
Just what about that book is so interesting? An cursed herself, wishing she had taken a seat closer to him. I can’t see from this far...
Then, the rocking stopped, the chair hitting the flooring unceremoniously. Shutting the notebook’s open face, Akito placed his phone on the soft cover: his fingers moved next, pushing headphones into his eardrums.
At this, An sighed, slowly averting her gaze. Darn it! I wanted to snatch a peek of what he was writing. Gulping down the broccoli, she shoved aside the tomatoes, thinly sliced, an attempt to hide their vile, red shade, in her salad. The more he keeps it a secret, the more I want to find out! Her teeth bit down on a wedge of carrot.
And that’s when the words, alongside a simple percussion, rang out, across the cafeteria:
~Your voice is like soda, bursting with bubbles~
~Blushing, blazing, my skin scorched by your gaze~
…
HUH?
An choked. Half chewed, and accidentally swallowed from sheer surprise, the carrot jutted in her throat. Coughing out loud, the sound garnered her the attention of some students. The majority, however, exchanged bewildered, bemused glances, as the song continued.
~The ache makes me wonder if it’s worth the trouble~
After much chest pounding and water gulping, the protruding vegetable finally went down. As soon as An regained her breath, she darted to her feet, following the music’s trail.
~To pursue this love - or am I just in a daze~
A trail, which led to Akito’s table. The girl froze to a stop, trying to look over the crowd that had formed, just as the song came to a sudden end. The song, sung in a deep, passionate voice.
A voice which very clearly sounded like Akito’s. Was Akito’s.
And, much to the misfortune of the male singer, this fact had not gone unnoticed by the crowd of Kamiyama High attendees.
“Dude! Was that you singing?”
“And a cringey love ballad? No way .”
“Be quiet, you guys! I-I thought you sounded really nice, Shinonome-kun-”
“Yeah! And I’ve never heard that song before! Is it an original?”
The questions didn’t end. The teasing didn’t end. And the group in front of An, which obscured Akito’s body, didn’t thin, no matter how the seconds passed, prompting the girl to say the first thing she thought of, as a means of gathering their attention.
“That’s- it’s- our new song!”
The intrusive gazes of the students, like scopes of a gun, immediately locked onto An. Ignoring the tremble in her rapid words, she forged ahead. “S-since it’s almost Valentine’s, we’re thinking of putting on a more romantic show! So, Akito’s been writing lyrics! Right, Akito?”
The crowd, attention fixed on An, had gradually divided from Akito’s table, revealing the boy’s mortified, irritated, and utterly confused expression. A confusion which seemed to be one part ‘why are you helping me out’ and two parts ‘what the heck are you talking about’.
He’s too slow! “Right, Akito?” The girl stared at the songwriter, eyebrows rising to deliver the insinuation more strongly.
“Oh- yeah,” the insinuation successfully received, Akito nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I was told to work on it…so I recorded myself singing. As a demo. I thought I had my headphones connected…” The thought trailed off, his front teeth piercing his lower lip.
A momentary hush descended, a sudden fog. Then, the mist cleared, smiles lighting up the room. The bodies turned to Akito.
“Hey man, you could’ve just told us!”
“Yeah! Think you could get us tickets to the event? I’m sure my girlfriend would dig it.”
“Of course!” An sidled her way to the front of the group, butting in before anyone else could speak up, the best smile she could muster plastered over her face. “We’ll hand out flyers soon! So just sit tight for now, and eat lunch, ok?”
“Ok! Sounds cool!”
“We’ll definitely try to come!”
Satiated by the proposal, the long line dispersed, the students taking up their seats and positions. All except An, who huffed, heart pumping. I thought they’d never leave…I feel exhausted, and I wasn’t even the one who was being questioned. I bet Akito is beyond annoyed…
“Oi.”
An was correct. Before she could offer any placating words, Akito spoke. Head downcast, and orange locks of hair spilling over his eyes, his face remained a mystery. The red flush around his ears and cheeks, however, spoke volumes about his emotional state. “If you think I’m gonna thank you for lying, I’m not.”
Like a flame to an ice cube, Akito’s entire lack of gratitude melted away his saviour’s compassion. “Uh, I’m pretty sure I just saved your face? Plus, I’m not gonna ask about…” An paused, the romantic song lyrics crowding her brain, “whatever that song was, so save me the sass, will you?”
Though, I really, really, really want to…
“Yeah, ok,” Akito sighed, sensing her justified irritation. “Sorry. I’m just…damn,” he ruffled his hair violently, slapping his palms over his face. “I’m so pissed…at myself, and them. Mainly myself.”
An laughed wryly, flashing a longing glance to the abandoned bento box on her table. “Make that two of us! There’s not even enough time left for me to finish lunch…”
“That’s what you’re worried about?” A brittle, dry laugh came from Akito, his hands dropping. “Not all those guys showing up at our next show?”
“You think I’m actually going to give any of them a flyer? No way!” Their backs turned to her, An glared at the gossiping students. “They were annoying.”
“Mm...Yeah.”
The two songwriters remained still for several heartbeats. An, eyes searing a hole in the back of several blazers. Akito, eyes fixed on the girl standing beside him. Mouth opening, tongue rising, as if to form a syllable…
Only to stop short, at the sound of the school bell, signalling the return of class time. Trays were put away, teenagers fled the scene, and hungry hands snatched last minute snacks from the school store. This included An, who issued a quick farewell to the boy, tearing herself from Akito’s side with regret.
There goes another chance to ask about the chocolates. And anyways, what was up with that song? I’ll have to grill him about that.
Just like in the previous class, An came under fire for a lack of focus on historical events. And this time, she had no excuse: she spent the entire period thinking about Akito’s frame, hunched over his notebook, and the surprisingly soft sound his voice had transformed into, singing that song. That yearning, pining song.
…I wish he hadn’t noticed it was playing so fast. I wonder if I’ll ever hear it again?
“Welcome! Please, let me direct you to your seats: today, we have a Valentine’s special!”
After having repeated them countless times, in the same forced, peppy voice, the words no longer carried flavour in An’s mouth. No matter how many drinks she prepared, no matter how many couples she escorted to a table, and no matter how many complaints she directed to Ken, the traffic directed towards WEEKEND GARAGE never ended.
Please…just…end me at this point…An staggered towards the counter, accepting the coffees, parfaits and lattes Ken slid towards her hands. The cafe’s last minute Valentine’s promotion had been a huge success. Too huge. Ken had requested immediate aid, and An, having used the store’s utilities for her chocolate manufacturing and thus in her father’s debt, had accepted the opportunity to get even readily. Which, as soreness ebbed through her feet and arms, she regretted. This sucks…
The hand of a clock adorning a wall inched forward, announcing the time as 6:00 pm. An winced. Since when was the day almost over? I mean, I guess I can give Kohane, Toya, and Akito their chocolates tomorrow. With no live show for the day, and Kohane and Toya having plans with their family, the group would convene tomorrow instead.
But I wish I could see them today. The cups jostling in her grip, not unlike bodybuilding weights, sucked away her strength. I wish I could just sing today, period! Under the familiar, hot lights of the stage, hearing the rambunctious cheers of the audience, and feeling her throat burst with music was a faraway, comforting image in her head, a respite from her problems at hand.
A respite so good that she forgot reality, until it reintroduced itself with a rude, wet splat. The reality being: she had been carrying several food items, had paid little attention to where she had planted her feet, and one of the parfaits had fallen to the ground, the glass unshattered, luckily, and sugary whipped cream, strawberry, and chocolate sauce contents smeared across hard wood, significantly less luckily.
Crap, crap, crap! Ugh…Customers turned to the mess, eyes wide with curiosity, then pity, and finally, disinterest, returning quickly to their conversations as An quickly sopped up the mess. Swish swash went the napkin, the square cloth leaving a faint, white spiral imprint where the parfait had laid seconds before. It’s ok, it’s ok. Smile, just smile! After only a minute, the customer whose parfait had suffered premature demise was apologized to, the surviving drinks were delivered, and a satisfied bundle of customers departed.
“Thank you!” An called out to their backs, her eyes flitting to the storefront decorations. Oh, the sign is crooked. Happy to have a distraction, she bounded to the board beside the door, bending down to straighten the quaint, wooden legs. Inscribed on the green chalkboard, alongside the menu and promotions, were hearts, ribbons, and two cats, tails intertwined.
One of the felines glared at any glancing passerbys with green eyes sharply downturned, their tabby fur either extremely fluffy or aggressively bristling. Or maybe both! Meanwhile, the other one, grey, lithe, had a pink tongue sticking out of their ‘W’ shaped mouth.
Like the moon and the sun, kind of. An smiled. Cute!
“An!” Ken’s voice interrupted her feline analysis. “I need hands over here!”
“Coming!” Standing up, but still enamored by the cats, An almost didn’t register the jangling of the bells attached to the cafe’s door. Nor the body of the new customer, if not for her face smacking right into their chest.
“Ow! Ugh, oh, my apologi-”
“Oi, watch where you’re going. You could fall.”
Huh?
An blinked. Rubbed at her forehead. Am I hearing things? Then, her eyes widened, travelling upwards to take in the familiar build, orange, mussed hair, and face. A human replica of the orange tabby, and surely a sight for sore eyes as she stammered, “What the heck are you doing here, Akito?”
The boy coughed, his retreating step causing An to realize just how close they had been. “I got a call from Ken-san. He said he could use more hands on deck. And I already finished my shift, so…”
“Yes!” Tears of joy pricked at An’s eyes. “Yes we could! You have no idea how bad it’s been.” Grabbing his wrist, An directed the recruit to the kitchen area, weaving through the bustling cafe. “You’ll need an apron. You can serve the food to the customers, ok?”
“Alright, sure,” Akito turned the straps of his allocated apron over in his hand. “But I can’t put this on with you clutching my wrist.”
“Oh. OH.” Skin suddenly on fire, An snatched her hand off of Akito’s, as if it were an open flame. “Sorry, I hadn’t even realized-”
“It’s fine. I’m used to you being an airhead sometimes. More often than just sometimes.”
“Hey! We didn’t hire you for your sarcasm. Now get to work before I fire you!”
“As if you would. So, which table am I taking these parfaits too?”
“Table five!”
With each frenzied instruction doled out, Akito nodded along, swiftly latching on to the procedures. Admiration filled An as she watched him from the kitchen, where she pumped whipped cream onto strawberry parfaits. He caught onto things fast, moved efficiently, and was always ready to show a smile. A fake smile, no doubt about that. But he’s saving my life right now. She made a heart pattern in a latte’s foamed milk as she smiled. I’ll make sure Dad gives him a bonus!
The clock hands moved fast henceforth. Plate after plate was carried from and back to the kitchen. Drink after drink was carefully crafted, and before long, it was closing time, satisfied singles, couples, and families flitting out the cafe door, as Akito and An waved.
“Thank you! Please come again!”
“Yes, please do!”
At the final jingle of the bell, the two heaved a tortured sigh. An flipped the ‘Open’ sign over with the last shred of energy in her body, before collapsing on a red barstool. “I’m spent…absolutely spent.”
The part-timer placed his hands on his shoulders, rolling them. A chorus of cracks and pops followed. “Ken-san never told me it’d be that bad. Else, I would’ve saved myself.”
“Ha! I don’t blame you,” An paused, eyes crinkling, “but it’s a good thing you showed up! We really needed the help.” And I definitely needed the company!
“It’s nothing,” Akito huffed, sweat sliding down his face as he moved across the room. “Though yeah, when I walked in, and saw you, I legit thought a ghost possessed you. You looked dead.”
“Uh, yeah, because I was! Do you have any idea how many parfaits and waffles I had made by that point?” An shuddered involuntarily. “No, no, I don’t want to think about it…”
“Yeah, don’t,” Akito placed a towel, evidently one of the many in the kitchen, over the haunted girl’s head as he passed the barstool. After a moment, his voice resounded from further away. “How about you sing, instead?”
Huh? “Sing? Really?” Sliding the towel off her head, the surprise on the girl’s features etched deeper as she turned her head. Akito was situated at the cafe’s stage, hands readjusting the microphone’s angle. Mouth parting, his Adam’s Apple stretched as he let out a lengthy note. Nodding with satisfaction at the sound output, he gestured towards the other microphone stand, to his side.
So, it’s not just me who felt empty about not having practice! An bounded from the seat, and hopped towards the stage. “Alright, let’s do this!”
“Sweet. Ok, let’s go with…”
“Woo! That was good! Look at you go, with those high notes!”
“Yeah, I’ve been trying to get better on those. You didn’t do half bad on the rap portion.”
“Muahahaha, I’ve been practicing that part! It feels so good to get it right~”
The music, having fizzled out, left Akito and An sweating as they clutched their microphones. The clock hand pointed closer and closer to nighttime, the world outside the cafe window’s empurpling. Despite the lateness and being worked to the bone hours prior, An felt a rush in her bones. This is so much fun! She flipped her face over to the boy beside her. “So, what should we sing next?”
The question she posed to her singing rival was met by him stepping down from the stage. “Whichever one you want,” Akito pointed towards the staff area of the cafe with one hand, using the other to flip his hair over his scalp. “I need to use the toilet. Be back in a bit.”
“Ok!” An put her thumb and index finger together to form a circle. With the click of the bathroom door closing, she let out a sigh. Phew. For a second, I thought he’d say he needed to leave! Oh- Wait- This is my chance!
Returning the microphone to its metallic holder, An leapt down the platform, darting to the kitchen. She reached to the very depths of the fridge, fingers uselessly flailing around, before finding it. The bag. There!
Slamming the fridge to a close, and earning a baleful look from Ken, who was washing dishes, in the process, An hurried to her position in the cafe’s sitting area, placing the bag on a chair. No sign of Akito, as predicted. But the lone microphone remained…
A glance to the left.
…well, he did say he’d let me pick the song.
A glance to the right.
…he won’t know. Right?
An tiptoed to the mic. Drawing in a shaky breath, readjusting the stand. Then, after deliberation, parting her lips:
~Your voice is like soda, bursting with bubbles~
~Blushing, blazing, my skin scorched by your gaze~
She could feel her face growing into a smile, with every word she remembered:
~The ache makes me wonder if it’s worth the trouble~
~To pursue this love - or am I~
“What. The. Hell?”
~just, in- a daze?
The music dried up in her An’s throat. Her smile, frozen on her face, her hands, frozen on the microphone, and her face, burning, at the sight of Akito’s incredulous stare from halfway across the room.
Crap-
Akito’s body was stone. Palms laid flat against his shirt, mouth hanging askew. The shock radiating from his every feature seemed to scream one thought, a sentence, which just so happened to be the same one ringing through An’s mind. That being:
I want to die.
The fiery-haired songwriter broke free of his petrification faster than An. “Why?” Akito demanded, hazel eyes burning. “Why the hell are you singing that song?”
Red in the face, An darted from the microphone. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry- it’s just been stuck in my head!” she stammered, her hands hanging up, like a criminal faced with the law. “Is that so wrong?”
“Uh, yeah.” Akito’s tone cut like glass. “First I had to get embarrassed at school, and now you’re singing it here too?”
“Well- ok, true. So it was wrong...I mean, I’m not surprised you’re mad! And I am sorry…” Taking a great interest in the flooring, and ears pricking with embarrassment, An twiddled with a blue grey strand of hair.
“Hm. I-”
“But,” An muttered, voice lowered to a whisper, “you did say ‘whichever one you want’...soooo…”
“...”
No matter how silent Akito remained, the facts were the facts: he had said that. The boy, evidently, wished he could rewrite the past, as he scratched at his already mussed hair. “Damn me…I did say that, yeah.”
To An’s surprise, once she mustered the courage to look up at Akito, the hue of his skin was a pink more akin to embarrassment than anger. And to further her surprise, he stalked to the stage, quickly climbed up, and seized the microphone.
Only this time, the lyrics which streamed from his mouth weren’t ones she recognized:
~The fool I am, I reach out to your skin~
~Cool to the touch, the balm to my pain~
~Even knowing in this love, there’s no way to win~
The words stopped, Akito lowering his vision to the wooden floorboards underfoot. A few seconds of silence later, he opened his mouth.
~I keep looking for you, in spite of the strain.
Soft, tender, words. Transparent, fragile notes. And, somehow, somehow…an undertone of pain, enveloping the music.
They were descriptors that An, transfixed by the song, had never applied to Akito’s singing before. Just…woah. I’ve…never heard him this passionate before. He sounds so- so different! Her lips slanted into a frown. Almost like…he’s in pain. But why?
Isn’t this a love song?
“There.” A screech of feedback rang through the cafe as Akito roughly put the device away. “That’s all I’ve gotten so far,” the songwriter mumbled brusquely. The yellow glow of the stage lights nearly concealed the flush permeating his skin. Nearly. “I know, it sucks - oi, are you clapping to make fun of me?”
An’s hands paused, grin spreading. “No, I’m not! But you’re right. Those lyrics kind of suck!” At Akito’s grunt of pain, she rushed to continue. “Don’t get me wrong! I love the vibe! That feeling of loving someone, but not being able to see them…it feels so real.”
Silence settled in. Broken, after a few seconds, by the girl. “But yeah. Those lyrics still kind of suck!”
“I KNOW they do. You don’t need to rub it in.”
“Hey, lemme finish here. I was gonna say: wouldn’t it be fun if we both worked on the song, like usual? If you’d like to!” An hastily tacked on the last part, suddenly feeling self-conscious.
I mean, I still don’t know who the song is about, or why he’s writing it…I shouldn’t get ahead of myself…But I can’t get over the way it makes me feel!
“Well…” Akito started, her offer having painted a new shine on his face. A shine which, after a prolonged pause, dimmed, An’s stomach dropping, as Akito shook his head. “Nah. I’m good, thanks.”
“Oh. Alright! Makes se-”
“Once the lyrics are done, though…” Akito’s words tumbled out. “Can I show them to you, again? Like today?”
The tempo of An’s heartbeat jumped up at the gentle tone of Akito’s words. No. Not gentle. More like… shy? Akito, being shy? An’s cheeks began to ache, her smile arched so high. “Of course! I’m dying to see them!”
“Sweet. You better not tell anyone, then.” He punctuated the statement with the jab of a finger.
“Hmmmm…lemme think…” Carefully waltzing in a circle, thumb placed on her chin, and consideration weighing heavily on her eyelids, An drew out her response, long enough for her fingers to grasp the bag she had procured from the kitchen. She extended the fabric in front of Akito, the bag swaying and hitting his hoodie drawstrings. Her voice sounded wobbly to her own ears as she spoke, “If you accept these, I’ll think about being quiet! Maybe!”
“The hell?” An orange eyebrow rose up Akito’s forehead. “What’s this?”
“No questions! Just open it!”
Beat beat beat. The ginger gave the girl a quizzical glance. Then, took hold of the bag’s strings, fingers lightly brushing the hands of the gift giver. Beat beat beat beat beat.
His eyes widened at the mass nestled inside. He cracked open the brown box hesitantly, as though prying open a metal cage containing an infectious rat. The astonishment which manifested in the gaping of his mouth indicated that he perceived the contents to be far more favourable than a rodent.
"Wow," he breathed. Reaching in, he grasped a miniature, brown square from the box, his gaze appraising. Beat. Beat.
The square plopped onto his tongue. An could hardly hear his chewing over her heartbeat. I hope he likes the flavour! She had never found the perfect chance to ask him what chocolate flavour was his favourite. And with Akito, eating the chocolates she had made, right in front of her, she felt more anxiety than ever. Why is he chewing for so long? Just say something!
At the end of a lengthy, torturous moment for the confectionary creator, he did. “Cream cheese and maple filling?”
An’s head jerked up, the nerves in her stomach slightly loosening. “Yeah! Chocolate truffles with maple flavoured cream cheese inside! Though, the chocolate is semi-sweet.”
“Mmm.” Akito marmed another in his mouth. “Hwo mwade it?”
An tittered at the garbled question, resting her hands proudly on her hips. “That’s a secret!”
Thoughtful chewing. A gulp. “Store bought, then.”
“No! I’m not cheap!”
“Oh?” Akito’s mouth stretched into a smirk, a teasing glint lighting his eyes. Taking a step forward, he craned his neck to peer down on An’s flushed expression. “You’re telling me you get all of your obligatory chocolate specially made?”
The smile on An’s face dissolved. Sagging inches lower, eyes glazing, as she digested Akito’s flippant words.
Obligatory chocolates? He thinks that…these are obligatory?
For one utterly bewildered second, An paused. The second passed. Of course not! She recovered her senses, and ability to speak. “No, they’re friends-”
“No, my bad,” Akito quickly mumbled, stopping An’s explanation. “Don’t answer that. That’s a crappy question.” One of his sneakers kicked at the cafe floor, where his gaze was trained.
“Oh- alright, Mr. Cryptic!” An obeyed, zipping her mouth shut. But not before letting out a sigh of relief.
Wait. Relief?
Why- why am I relieved?
Her opportunity to question her own emotions was cut short as Akito lifted up the case of chocolates. “What I meant was- thanks. I hadn’t expected this. I’ll make it up to you.”
Oh, right, White Day! I hadn’t even thought of that. “No need! It’s no big deal-”
“No, it is.” For the umpteenth time that night, Akito cut through her stammering. “I want to. Besides, it’s the least I can do…you did save me big time, yesterday. During lunch.”
The day’s tumultuous happenings flashed through An’s mind. "Well, I did..." She momentarily relished the credit. "But who cares! You don’t need to trouble yourself like that.”
“Nuh uh. I will.”
“Don’t!”
“Nope.” The boy stuck out his tongue.
“Ugh! Don’t, ok?” Face puffed in a pout, Akito’s childish mannerism rubbing off of her, An bopped a fist against Akito’s chest, closing the metre distance between them. And instantly regretting it, the two turning a hotter red than the Valentine’s decorations still present within the cafe’s interior.
Never had An sidestepped faster. “Sorry-”
“You’re fine. It’s fine.” Never had Akito spoken faster.
Never had Ken sounded more awkward as he poked his head out of the kitchen area. “Sorry, you two...but I should be closing up shop now. An, let’s go. And Akito-kun, here’s your pay.”
“Oh. Thank you very much- but I’m ok. I don’t want it.” Surprise shone on the faces of the Shiraishi’s at Akito’s firm refusal. His gaze shifted, resting lightly on An, and then the box in his grip, as he continued, “I’ve already received more than enough.”
“Hm?” Ken, unaware of the lore, looked from one teenager to the other, to glean some part of the story. Giving up, he let out a hearty chuckle. “Well, if you say so…but you better believe I’m giving you a discount the next time you show up, ok?”
“Oh, no need..!”
Like the sun breaking out of storm clouds, An’s smile spread. Though her eyes watched the conversation, her ears registered zero of the words exchanged.
‘I’ve already received more than enough’, huh? Man. Akito can say some corny things sometimes!...I don’t hate it, though.
Once Ken let go of Akito’s attention, An sprung up on the boy, situated in front of the establishment’s door. “Let me walk you partway?”
The boy, in the process of throwing on a scarf, paused. “I can go myself.”
“Uh, that’s obviously not what I mean! I want to walk with you partway.”
“Oh.” Akito flipped the muffler over his mouth, yet his eyes showed the wrinkles of a smile. “Guess I don’t have a choice.”
The brisk chill of night wind was a sneaky thing, sliding through the cracks in An’s clothes. Still dressed in her cafe uniform, and with only her school blazer haphazardly thrown on for protection, each step she took beside Akito prompted another shiver through her skin. This, however, did nothing to prompt her to return home sooner. Not even as the two met a fork in the road: the parting point they decided on.
“Hey, thanks again. For helping out today.” As though pushing them through thick snow, An’s legs churned just as slowly as her words. “You were a lifesaver!”
“Huh? Oh,” Akito, paces ahead for the entirety of their excursion, turned around. A light shake of his head caused his coppery hair to bounce around. “It’s cool. I didn’t have anything else to do.”
Oh ho ho? Alone on Valentines?...no. The teasing sounded artificial in An’s head, and panged in her heart. That’s not what I want to say. Clutching her hands behind her back, she swung on the balls of her feet, trying to put enthusiasm on her face. “Well, I’m sure we’ll be just as busy on White Day, so head on by then too, ok?”
“Seriously?” Akito’s laugh tingled like ointment, alleviating part of the ache in An’s heart. “What is this, slave labour?”
“Hey, you’re the stubborn fool who didn’t accept the money.”
“Shut up. That’s not ‘cuz of stubbornness.” The boy paused, evidently chewing over something in his mind. The cold wind hardened into a flurry of snowflakes, and the sudden blur of white concealed Akito’s expression as he continued, “By then…I mean, White Day…I should have the song done. I’ll show it to you.”
Time held its breath. What? Huh? Really? The beat of An’s heart, stronger than a thousand layers, defrosted her vocal chords, and the smile on her face. “Is that gonna be your return gift?” This time, the teasing tasted sweet on her tongue, like a rich, melting chocolate.
Clearly, it tasted bitter for Akito, who grimaced. “What, it aint good enough?”
“No, no!” An furiously flailed her hands. “It’s more than enough! I’m so excited now. You better show me, for real!”
“Ok, ok. Just don’t get your hopes that high up.” Akito’s exasperated smile betrayed his brusque words. A smile which fell, as he gazed down and up on An’s winter apparel. Or, more accurately, lack thereof. “You should head to the cafe. It’s getting cold.”
“Awwww. I barely feel it!” It wasn’t a lie. But the moon’s high perch in the sky roused An to her senses. “You’re right, though. You need to get home, too. See you at school, then?”
“Yeah. And hey,” Akito lifted the bag of chocolates, his body in mid-turn, “thanks for the chocolates. Seriously. They’re damn good.”
“Oh-” An electric shock coursed through An’s veins. “You mean it? Wow-” Pierced by the short yet gratifying compliment, she staggered, all too conscious of how Akito hadn’t started moving yet, watching her fumble. “I mean, good! That’s good. All the more reason for you to finish the song!”
Akito’s nose scrunched, expression going from blooming to wilting. “Listen…if you keep nagging me about it, I will take that offer back.”
“Kidding! I’m kidding! And hey, I only reminded you ONCE! I won’t nag you any more.”
“You better…ok, night. Get home safe, yeah?”
“I should be saying that to you! But thanks. Good night!”
Though enshrouded by snowfall, the stretch of Akito’s hand, moving in a waving motion, was clear to An’s eyes as he walked down the snow-filled street, chocolates swaying in his other hand. While watching the chocolates, and the boy, until they were both completely out of sight, it wasn’t Akito’s song which looped inside An’s head.
Rather, it was his question: of whether or not the chocolates, the ‘damn good’ chocolates, were obligatory. Implying that… he doesn’t think that I see him as a close friend?
Not after all the advice she had given him, and all the advice he’d given her. Not after their low points as a group, or the high points. Or the teasing, banter, and rivalry. Or his smirks. Or the way he laughed, hearty, refreshing.
Or the way he looked at her, while they were performing. Blazing. Hungry.
Alive.
…Or the way he’s super rude, asking a question like that in the first place! Of course we’re friends! They’re friendship chocolates. Friendship. Friendship!
And definitely nothing more than that! Nothing!
Breaking into a run on the path home, An didn’t need a jacket. The warmth blasting in her cheeks was more than enough to keep her warm, well into the night.
- End