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"So let me get this straight," Blaine says, crossing his arms and fixing Sebastian with a gaze full of suspicion from where he's sitting on the bed.
Sebastian smirks and leans forward in his chair, leering at the other boy. "There's nothing straight about me, Blaine, though I will gladly give you a demonstration should you have any doubts."
Blaine furrows his brows in confusion. While the flirting in itself is nothing unusual when it comes to his enemy-turned-friend, something is not quite right. Sebastian's expression seems off – the smile is strained, the lustful stare forced, and the tension of his shoulders, though slight, doesn't go unnoticed. Blaine blinks, and then the realisation comes to him.
"Oh my God. You're actually serious."
Sebastian's eye twitches. Twitches. That's just... Wow.
"About the demonstration? Why yes, I-" Sebastian begins, but Blaine gets there first, not willing to take any more of Sebastian's shit.
"You actually want me to help you woo Kurt. You're actually serious." Blaine realises that he's sounding like a broken record, but he can't help himself, this is definitely not a situation he thought he'd ever find himself in and he wonders why it's so quiet because surely the apocalypse has to be coming upon them.
Sebastian rolls his eyes, crossing his arms as well and leaning back in his seat defensively. "Not 'woo', you drama queen. I said 'ask him out'." He then proceeds to look at Blaine with something like expectation in his expression, but Blaine still hasn't gotten over the fact that this is Sebastian Smythe asking for advice on how to get a date with Kurt Hummel. From the latter's ex-boyfriend.
Blaine wonders if he's missed the memo about this being the Twilight Zone or something.
"But you hate him," is the only thing he manages to say, which Sebastian doesn't even deem worthy of a reply, huffing and looking to the side instead. When some time has passed and it becomes apparent that Blaine is actually especting some kind of verbal reaction, he relents.
"Yes, well, I thought so, too, but then I realised that I... don't."
That clears everything up, thank you very much, you prick. Blaine, though a kind person at heart, gets a probably unhealthy amount of satisfaction from insulting Sebastian in his head. That's what he gets for hanging around Kurt and Sebastian at the Lima Bean for extended periods of time.
"So, you-" Blaine starts, but is interrupted by his phone ringing where he left it on the nightstand. He picks it up, looks at the screen and stops the ringing before putting it down to lie in front of him on the covers. He looks back at Sebastian. "So, you're saying that you like Kurt? Excuse me if I have difficulties believing that, but when did this even happen?"
Sebastian's shoulders tense further, but his face looks unusually serious. "Remember Rachel's party, like, three months ago?" he asks. "The one where everyone got really drunk and Kurt did that smoking Single Ladies dance?"
Blaine's mouth falls open. "You didn't."
Sebastian smirks. "Oh yes, I did. Well, we did, to be precise. Several times."
"I did not need to know that," Blaine groans while Sebastian is looking inordinately pleased with himself. That bastard.
(It's not like Blaine has any romantic feelings towards Kurt anymore, mind, but this is still his best friend they're talking about. There is such a thing as too much information.)
"Anyway," Blaine continues, anything to get away from the topic of his friends' sex life. "What happened after that? And before you say that's none of my business, let me remind you that by coming to my house and asking how you 'ask the Princess out', you've made it my business. So you better tell me the whole story right now, or you're not getting a single word of advice out of me."
His little tirade earns Blaine a glare from Sebastian which he calmly ignores, secretly reveling in the feeling of having the upper hand in a conversation with one of the wittiest people he knows.
Sebastian's glare lasts only for a few seconds before he sighs, obviously resigning himself to his inevitable fate which consists of talking about his feelings. The horror.
"Well," he shrugs, feigning nonchalance but let's be honest here, at this point he's not fooling anyone anymore. "What can I say? The sex was good. Like, really good." Sebastian's tongue flicks out to lick his bottom lip while Blaine cringes. "So we did it again sometime later. And again. And again. And... somehow, between all the fucking, we started just hanging out, y'know? Like, getting coffee at the Bean, eating take-out after sex, even watching movies, God."
He sounds disgusted, but Blaine knows better; the tiny quirk of Sebastian's lips, almost nonexistent but still undeniably there, tells a whole other story.
"And it was... fun?" Sebastian continues, looking everywhere but at Blaine, obviously uncomfortable. "I hadn't known being with Princess could be so much fun. I..." He cards a hand through his hair, tugging lightly at the strands. "Fuck. I just... I don't do this shit. I don't... I don't even know what the fuck it is that I'm feeling. But... I know that I miss him when he's not there, and want to see him and... fucking talk to him about my day or some shit like that. And now he's going off to New York, and even though I'll be there too, it's not like what we have will last, he'll meet new people, new friends, new guys, and I... I don't fucking want him to. So I'm going to fucking ask him out and you're going to fucking help me with that, Hobbit."
The last part of Sebastian's increasingly fervent speech sounds more like a demand than a request but at this point? Blaine really doesn't fucking care.
"Fine," he says, keeping his expression carefully neutral. "You have my approval, Sebastian."
Sebastian just stares at him for a moment, still caught up in his unexpected outburst, and is that a faint tinge of red on his cheeks? Then he seems to get himself under control again, leaning back in his seat once more and glaring at Blaine, just daring him to comment on it. "So," he drawls sarcastically, all coolness and self-confidence. "The 'wooing'?"
"Oh, that," Blaine replies lightly, though he can't keep a slight smirk from his lips. "Congratulations, you've done it splendidly. A true natural. Sincerity always works best, after all."
"What the fuck are you-" Sebastian's irritated inquiry is cut off by Blaine standing up and walking towards his chair.
"Good luck, my student, I believe I've taught you well," Blaine says, his eyes practically sparkling with mirth as he grins from ear to ear and hands Sebastian his phone.
Connected to: Kurt Hummel, the screen says.
The duration reads 11:34.
The silence that falls upon the room is deadly and all-encompassing.
"Sebastian?" a soft voice says. "I think we need to talk."
