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"Johnny, listen, you understand that there is no way it could have been the same mouse." Gyro tried to reason with Johnny.
"NO. You don't understand you weren't there. IT HAD TO BE DANNY!" Johnny shouted, tears streaming down his face.
"Please just think about it, you released a mouse into the wild and a few months later another mouse happened to spook the horse. Johnny, be reasonable that the mouse you release Danny could have been eaten by an owl the day after you released it for all you know. You lived by a field where hundreds of white mice must have lived."
"GYRO YOU DON'T GET IT! IT HAD TO BE DANNY! Because if it wasn't then he died for nothing..." Johnny said that last part barely above a whisper.
"If it wasn't Danny then he died for nothing."
"Johnny..." Gyro said, reaching out his hand as he spoke in a soft voice.
"What was it for? If it wasn't my fault then who was it? Why did he have to die? If it wasn't my fault then he died for nothing and there is no reason for anything. He was always a much better person than I was... it should have been me instead. It had to be Danny or it was all for nothing it needs to be my fault."
"No Johnny it isn't it doesn't have to be. Your brother would never want you to blame yourself for his death."
"Like you would know what Nicholas would want." Johnny snorted.
"I never met him but from everything you told me he wouldn't want you to think this way." Gyro reassures, wiping the tears from Johnny's face.
"I know..." Johnny quietly spoke after a while. "But it's easier to believe than to accept he really is gone and left with nothing when he had so much more potential."
"The people who die early are always full of potential." Gyro stated simply while hugging Johnny as he quietly sobbed.
"It never should have been you."
"Hmm what do you mean?" Johnny asked lifting his head from Gyros chest to meet him in the eyes.
"You just being here has improved my life in every possible way. You were never worse Johnny, just different. You never lost your potential, you used it to get to where you are. The spark I see inside of you never left it's still burning with every breath you breathe." Gyro softly spoke while stroking Johnny's hair.
"Sometimes I wish I could go back to the kid I once was and help him. This poor broken kid left all alone in the world to turn into someone I don't even recognize as myself anymore. I wish I could fix all my damage... but maybe my father was right......" Johnny whispered into Gyros' shoulder.
"Have you ever heard of kintsugi?" Gyro asked and Johnny shook his head in response.
"It's a Japanese art where you repair what's broken but instead of hiding the cracks you highlight them with gold. You aren't broken Johnny, you are perfect the way you are. You are still all versions of yourself that you used to be. The only thing you have control over is who you choose to be tomorrow."