Chapter Text
She stayed at the Vanilla Kingdom for three days before her departure. It was many, many years ago, and yet… every second, every detail is as clear in my mind as can be. Those three days, I retrace over and over. Those three days, I'll regret for the rest of my life.
Allow me to describe the events as they torment me once more.
—
She arrives on a Thursday morning. It’s late February in the Vanilla Kingdom, and the high altitude only contributes to the cold. The clouds obstruct any sense of the time, leaving the clocktower as my only source. I keep glancing at the tower in anticipation for the airship. It is my belief that this will be just a visit like any other. It will take over a decade for me to realize its true significance.
The airship arrives just on time, fitting for White Lily Cookie. She exits the airship, searching the crowd nervously. It always causes excitement in the kingdom when visitors and newcomers arrive, so a large crowd is gathered, of which I hang at the back. Given my stature, it’d be unlikely she’d find me at all if it weren’t for my crown. Still, at last, her eyes lock onto mine, and as she smiles her kind smile, my world shifts.
Suddenly, I’m conscious of my appearance. I, subtly as I can, place my staff in a position angled towards me where I’m able to see myself in its eye, using it like a mirror. It’s verified - I look the same way I did this morning. Soul jam perfectly centered, and not a strand of hair out of place.
It is all ruined as she walks right up to me and tousles my hair. I must be making some sort of face, as she laughs to herself. I stutter out - something, I’m sure. But I can’t think straight. Not when she’s looking at me that way.
I collect myself. Finally, I speak. “It is so good to see you again, White Lily Cookie.” The hand she used to tousle my hair has moved to rest comfortably on my shoulder.
“Pure Vanilla Cookie… Thank you for being so kind as to allow me into your kingdom once more.”
“And I will repeat it once more: You are always welcome in the Vanilla Kingdom, dear.” I grant her my warmest smile.
Her hand on my shoulder slips due to the material of my robes, so she moves it to her side awkwardly. Her smile is - less potent, somehow. I didn’t know it at the time, but this moment, one of thousands like it from over the course of our friendship, was a chance to really prod at her, to get her to share her true thoughts. To get her to stay.
I remain ignorant, and the moment passes. I clear my throat. “Shall we get some coffee? I would love to hear about how you have been. Let us be on our way, before the crowd of cookies surrounds us.”
“Our soul jams have made us quite the celebrities, but you wore your royal garments this morning. If you wanted to avoid getting surrounded, that is not the discreet wear I would have chosen.”
I sigh, but I’m smiling. “They’d recognize me anyway. I’m a resident! Besides, I just want to move on and spend time with you!”
Her cheeks go pink as I grab her hand to pull her along with me to head to the café. I always feel more youthful when I’m with her.
—
I lead her to the café, taking back alleys to avoid crowds. It’s not far from where we had been, but you wouldn’t know it—the scenery is completely changed. We find ourselves a block away from the square, across the street from the inn.
It’s one of those homely cafés, one that is narrow enough as to need a second floor for more seating. Our usual seat is the one out on the balcony, being both outside and secluded, but the air is brisk, so we settle for a table for two by the window.
The window is a little cloudy, but we still angle our chairs slightly toward it so that we can gaze down to watch the passersby below. Our menus rest undisturbed on our table, as we’ve been to this establishment many times together. We sit in comfortable silence, awaiting our waiter.
“Hello and welcome, may I take your order?” A bubbly voice chimes. We turn to look. The cookie is young, maybe in their college years. A bundle of nerves, for sure, with hair tied into a messy half-up half-down style. I look up towards White Lily Cookie, hinting for her to order first.
“I’ll take a matcha with a double shot of espresso?” The waiter quickly jots it down and looks my way.
“And I’ll have a Vanilla latte.”
The waiter chuckles. “Well, that certainly fits! Any breakfast snacks I can get you two?”
I glance over at Lily, who picks up the menu. She quickly scans it. “Could I get a chocolate- hmm.. no, a strawberry crepe, please?”
That sounds nice. “Make that two,” I add.
“Alright! I’ll take those off of your hands…” they grab our menus, “And your order will be ready shortly!”
We thank them, and they exit quickly. Clearly, it must be a busy hour of the day to work. We’re alone again.
“So, how are your travels? Any interesting stories?” I ask, testing the waters. The question left out is, of course, ‘Where have you been?’ I never ask that question, as the natural followups tend to cause arguments between us. I don’t ask her why and where she’s traveling anymore. I don’t think I’d like the answer.
Oblivious to my internal conflict, she looks out the window, seeming to ponder the question. “Well… I don’t know if I have any interesting stories to tell…” She turns back towards me. “Ah. There was this tale an older resident at one of the cookie villages I visited told me. It might bore you, sorry.”
“No, no, by all means, I’m curious!”
She smiles. “Well, it interested me because it’s one I’d never heard before. And, you know, having lived for as long as we have… it was neat to hear something new.” I settle in, placing my elbows on the table and leaning down to rest my head on my hands. She begins her story with a quiet enthusiasm that shows in her soft smile and the glint in her eyes.
“The legend goes that there is a magical kingdom populated by winged cookies on a faraway land. But this kingdom was attacked nightly by the wild hounds seen on no other part of Earthbread. These hounds terrorized and hunted the cookie population. Deciding that this could not be the fate of the kingdom, the king went on a decade-long quest to find answers from the witches as to how could protect his kingdom.
“He brought his most beloved companions along with him, and they faced many trials assigned to them by the witches. They crossed mountains, encountered elemental cookies, fought monsters and restored other kingdoms to peace. All they worked for was for the benefit of cookiekind. In return for his efforts, the king was granted with a solution to his kingdom’s predicament in the form of a spell: his kingdom would remain invisible for all besides its residents, making it impossible for the wild hounds to terrorize their kind any longer. And so, this magical kingdom entered a new age of prosperity.”
There’s a natural pause before I speak. “That is a lovely tale. And you're right, I’ve also never heard this legend before.” I had been paying attention to the story, sure, but truthfully I was more enamored by her storytelling and passion when speaking. I miss her.
“Your drinks?” Our waiter approaches, startling us. I straighten, and White Lily Cookie does the same. Sure enough, we are handed our coffees and crepes. We thank them as they once again hurry off.
“Do you think such a kingdom might exist?” I ask. We both stir our drinks.
“That’s something I’ve been wondering about myself. The old cookie said that the kingdom was inaccessible to travelers, and that anyone who did travel to its location would simply pass through it as if it was any other forest.”
“Fascinating… I mean, that sort of magic - is any cookie even capable of such a spell? I suppose that’s why he needed help from the Witches.” I take a sip of my latte and begin cutting my crepe.
“Yes, well… that was my thought too, but somehow, the way it’s described, it seems as if it was the king who cast the spell,” She leans her chin into her palm and swirls her drink in her right hand half-mindedly. “The Witches simply gave him the means and the knowledge to do so. And… perhaps a special staff?” She sets the drink down in thought.
“Yes… yes, it may be possible with a great object to help carry the spell. But maybe the staff is not enough. It’d be even better if the spell can be tied to something concrete in the kingdom. It’d have to be inconspicuous, of course.”
“Inconspicuous…” she pauses, and I spot a mischievous glint in her eye. “Like a Vanillian sheep, perhaps? Or a vanilla scone tree?”
I snort into my drink. “Are you planning on turning my kingdom invisible?”
“And if I was?” She’s smirking, ever so slightly.
“You’d use your lily magic, of course.”
“What? White magic is more efficient. Especially for this spell.”
“Right. Something celestial. I should have known.”
“Vanilla… I’m surprised you got that incorrect. Especially as a wielder of it yourself…”
“Close enough.”
“Far from it.”
“Not everyone was top of their class, you know!”
“You were second after me! You have no excuse.”
“Hmph.” She’s got me there.
“Don’t ‘hmph’ me. Hey- don’t pout at me either, just for being right.”
I respond, graciously, by grabbing a piece of her crepe with my fork and eating it, being sure to look back up at her as I do.
“Really? How immature,” she chastises, as she does the same.
We go back and forth for a minute, each of us doing our best to block the other with one hand and go on the offensive with the other. It’s easy for me to gain the upper hand - her crepe has already been meticulously cut, easy to grab from, whereas I prefer to cut as I go. She’s run out of crepe pieces to grab relatively quickly.
Her solution, of course, is not to accept defeat, but to steal my drink instead. I raise my eyebrow. She gives me a daring look as she drinks all of the little that is left.
“Really?”
“You can’t blame me. I like the taste.” And given my order of a vanilla latte, that could only mean…
I feel my face grow hot with realization. Taking advantage of my stun, she goes ahead and steals my crepe too.
“I win,” she states smugly. Cheater.
“That’s-”
“Not fair? All’s fair in love and war,” she shrugs in between bites of my crepe. I belatedly take hers to at least make it even.
“And this,” I pause to take a bite, “is the kingdom of love and peace.” I tame my hair with my other hand in a fruitless attempt to retain some sort of dignity.
She laughs, brightly and with musicality. It’s infectious, and I start to laugh too. The morning fog has cleared, and sunlight begins to shine brightly through the window, illuminating her heartfelt smile. Her cheeks are pink from laughter - I’m sure we’re matching there. She’s gorgeous.
We live in a comfortable silence as we finish each other's food and drinks. More and more patrons have come in since we’ve been here, and the chatter is a pleasant background noise. When I see the waiter next, I flag them down for the check.
As we wait, I notice her looking with mild curiosity out the window. I follow her gaze. She’s watching the clocktower, her expression unreadable. But I know exactly what she’s thinking, because I’m thinking the same. Time moves faster than us.
“We spent quite some time here. What do you say we head to the square? The children always love to greet you.”
Her eyes remain focused on the clocktower. “I haven’t visited them in some time. Are you certain they’ll remember me?”
I sigh, and smile sweetly at her. “You saw the crowd today when you were arriving. They love you, Lily.” As do I.
“Alright then,” she concedes unconvincingly. I have the urge to press the issue, to try to get through to her that I really do love her, and that she has people, friends, and family who love her. Instead, I let us sit in silence. I don’t want to ruin the atmosphere with a heavy conversation that she didn’t want to have.
Or… did she? Was this yet another mistake? Should I have pressed her? When do I cross the line of social convention to intervene and help a friend? Can I really call myself a good friend of hers if I can’t even-
“The check, sir?” I close that line of thought immediately.
“Yes, thank you.” I sign it quickly. “Thank you so much for your help today.”
The waiter blushes and smiles. “It’s always an honor to serve two heroes…!”
I laugh softly and Lily smiles. We thank him once more as he scurries away. The morning rush is still here. I imagine they must have many customers to get to.
—
It takes a little longer to get to the square, because this time, we take the more scenic route through the city.
I extend my hand towards her meaningfully, but she seems to miss it. I retract it. She doesn’t need it, after all. This time, we’re taking the main roads that she is very familiar with. I laugh awkwardly to play it off as a joke. “I know you know the way, Lily” I say, “I just thought it'd be fun to run through the crowds like last time.”
She seems lost in thought. “Let's just take it easy.” I nod like I understand. We continue walking, and my feet somehow feel heavier.
When we arrive at the square, however, the mood does a 180. We find ourselves in a jovial setting, kids playing in the grass, winter coats shed since the day has turned out surprisingly warm for a day in February. Shopkeepers with hearty smiles man stands with long lines, selling jellies and trinkets and everything in between. Adults snack with each other on the benches, old couples and young lovers alike. There is not a frown in sight.
But, most beautiful of all are the flowers, which have bloomed early. They’re all kinds of colors: blue, pink, yellow, white. A smile blooms on the flower next to me at the sight and my smile matches hers, relieved.
“White Lily Cookie!!!” The voices of several children exclaim. White Lily Cookie turns, shocked.
“Oh! Hello!” She picks up one of the cookies and spins him around in the air, giggling. “Wow, you all have grown since I’ve last seen you!” She ruffles the hair of a little girl and shakes the hand of another boy. A baby dough struggling to walk tugs her dress, and she crouches down to give them a hug.
“See? I knew they’d remember you!” I laugh. She gives me a grateful smile. More cookies come to play with her braid.
“Miss Lily Cookie?” A small girl asks timidly.
“Yes, dear?”
“Can we put flowers in your hair?”
Lily laughs, and all the flowers in the square laugh with her. She looks at me slightly apologetically. “Do you mind?”
“Of course not!” I exclaim. I had plans for the rest of the day, but a smile like that is so rare on her. She looks at me appreciatively. Little cookies have already gathered up flowers, and the taller ones have begun to stick the stems towards the top of her braid. It seems that all the kids in the square have resolved to do their part. Soon, the whole square is wrapped up in the commotion. Not a single small cookie has not tasked themselves with finding a flower to add to the braid. Parents help their baby doughs join in, and young couples find flowers to place in their lovers’ hair.
Inspired, I myself go to get a vanilla orchid, and I place it right next to the iconic Lily that rests near her temple. Only in retrospect do I realize she’s looking through me as I do it, her smile tight and eyes wandering. Why, Lily? What am I doing wrong? Why can’t I ever get it right with you? The flowers, the whole atmosphere of the town square is in color, and suddenly, just my touch alone brings out grey skies. I back away to let the kids finish, not trusting myself to not ruin the mood.
As the last flower is placed, her hair is as vibrant as ever, and her dough is glowing. At last, the whole town is in bloom. It’s one of the few graces of the world, to let me relive this memory, even if her smile is the widest when I step to the side.
Eventually, her attention returns to me. A chill has returned to the town, and parents are pushing their kids to put their coats back on. I hold out my hand, and she takes it.
We spend the next hour or two walking from shop to shop, perusing the collections of trinkets. We buy some jelly jerkies to chew on when we start to feel hungry again in the late afternoon. “Really makes you miss the Hollyberry kingdom jelly kebabs, right?” I ask playfully. She nods and chuckles.
As the night comes to a close, I begin to lead her back to the kingdom. Or, at least, I try. She stops in her tracks. I tilt my head in question. “Did you forget something?”
“No, I was just thinking… in all my visits here, I’ve never gotten a chance to stay at the inn.” My confusion must show on my face, so she continues quickly. “I mean- It feels weird just always staying in the castle, you know?”
“Er… do you not like your quarters?”
“No! Well, yes, they’re very nice, but… Pure Vanilla Cookie… doesn’t the castle get a little bit… suffocating, sometimes?”
I frown. “No, no, I get it. We can stay at the inn tonight. It will be good to see all of the lovely cookies who run it. I rarely get the chance to chat with them.”
She looks at me, curious. Then, she gives me a grateful smile. “Then let’s sleep there tonight, shall we?”
And then, it’s her turn to lead me into the night, moving quickly against the wind.
—
By the time we get to the inn, it’s far too late to converse with anyone seriously. It was more of Hollyberry’s hour of the day – the time for drinking juice. Lily is the star of the bar that night, everyone eager to hear her latest travel stories. I listen along too, enraptured by her passionate way of speaking yet again.
When I become overwhelmed by the noise of the bar, I excuse myself for the night. As I’m leaving, despite the crowd of people around her, Lily’s eyes lock onto mine, and she waves at me, smiling. I smile back at her, my heart flip-flopping in my chest.
I make my way to our room and prepare for bed. Once I lay down, all I can do is think. My mind wanders to the café, the town square, the bar. How she looked ar me when she waved at me just now. How she looked at me when I put a flower, my flower, in her hair.
My thoughts linger on those moments as I fall asleep.