Chapter Text
Vincent hadn‘t spoken a word in months, only in school if absolutely necessary, to his adoptive parents and little sister he communicated via sign language. It was currently December 23rd. The Saidi family wasn‘t exactly religious but they still celebrated Christmas, more so as a family tradition rather than a way to honor Jesus.
Vincent shared a room with his adoptive mothers older son, an 18 year old boy. The oldest had already moved out to go to college.
He sat in his bed, the top of a bunk bed, writing into his diary which was already almost full again, he ran through notebooks quickly these days, writing everything he didn‘t feel able to say out loud. He didn‘t decorate his room, it looked near identical to before he moved in despite having lived in it for years now. Jared, his adoptive brother, had a few posters up, Tupac, Eminem, a typical high school boy‘s room in late 2003. Vincent did have a small shelf above his bed where he stored his writing stuff and his favorite doll, a 2001 first wave Yasmin Bratz doll which he took everywhere with him, even to school, though he learned quickly to keep her in his backpack as to not get bullied too badly.
He sighed and closed his notebook, it was around 23:45 at that point, they were able to stay up late since it was the holidays.
He cleared his throat.
„Jared.“ he said in a raspy voice, a lot higher than the average 17 year old boy.
Jared was at his desk playing Call of Duty on the PC he had gotten last Christmas. He was very surprised to hear his brother speaking so he immediately left the public server, it must be serious if Vincent is using his voice.
„Vincent.“ he said, turning in his rolling chair to look up at him on the top bunk.
„What‘s up?“
„…“ Vincent didn‘t keep eye contact, in fact, he avoided it like the plague.
„I‘m gonna talk to Aaliyah and Muhammad tomorrow.“ he spoke quietly, his voice always so soft and gentle, feminine.
„…..okay? About…?“ Jared got up and climbed on the top bunk to sit criss crossed across from his much smaller brother who barely took up half the bed as he sat, he always made himself so small, that in combination with his tiny frame and he barely took up any space at all.
„Don‘t tell anyone. I want to… be the one to say it.“ Vincent murmured, scooching against the wall.
„I‘m gonna join the Army. When I turn eighteen.“
Jared stared at him, eyebrows furrowed. There lay some tense silence in the big room.
After maybe a minute he replied.
„No you’re not. Absolutely fucking not.“
Jared shook his head.
„You‘re not serious, right? You‘re not joining the Army- I mean… absolutely fucking not.“ he repeated.
„My minds made up. I already spoke to a recruitment manager.“
„Where the hell did you find a recruitment manager??“
„They came to school and held a speech right before break. He said when I turn 18 I can enlist.“
Jared scoffed, shaking his head.
„Don‘t tell me you fell for that Military Propaganda. You - I mean- why??“
„…“ Vincent stayed quiet for a moment as he thought, he could feel his brothers judgmental eyes piercing him down. He began fidgeting with his fingers, cracking his knuckles repeatedly.
„If you wanna play with guns that‘s fine but Jesus Christ, Vince, don‘t join the Army over a hobby. Do you even know what- I mean- what, you wanna go to Afghanistan and shoot some kids??“ Jared frowned heavily, raising his voice slightly.
Vincent raised his hand and shushed him.
„No- what‘s Marie gonna think? She sobbed for days when you went to the psych ward for a week, can you imagine how she‘ll react when you fucking- like- go shoot people for months on end??“ Jared whispered with clear anger in his voice.
„You‘re not even mentally stable enough for them to take you, look at your wrist!“
Vinnie frowned down at his lap, cracking his fingers almost compulsively.
„I don‘t care about Marie. She‘s old enough.“ he murmured softly.
„I made up my mind already. I‘ll talk to-„
„You dom’t care about her?! Seriously?? That girl loves you to death and you‘re just gonna leave her to go- what- bomb kids her age in the Middle East?? This isn‘t call of duty, Vincent, you‘re not gonna survive. Look at you! They‘ll laugh you out.“ Jared raised his voice again.
„Do you even realize what happens to boys like you in the Army?? It ain’t pretty.“
Vincent scrunched his nose, giving a small sniff. He had clearly already decided.
„Fuck, man.“ Jared sighed as he hopped off the bed.
„Where you goin‘?“ vincent asked.
„For a drive. I need to fuckin‘ clear my head.“ he grabbed his keys and headed out, slamming the door as he left to which Vinnie flinched slightly.
Vinnie was left sitting there, staring at his lap. Alone.
He wiped his face, he hadn‘t even noticed the tears falling until now. Before his mind could catch up his body moved him down the ladder and out of the room. He gave a few soft knocks to his adoptive parents bedroom. Muhammad wasn‘t home, he was working the night shift so it was just Aaliyah. She was woken up by the sound of a door slam but too groggy to try and get up, though that knock she recognized immediately as her baby‘s.
She got up and went to open the door, wearing her night dress and a bonnet.
„Vinnie. What‘s the matter, baby?“ she cooed immediately as she saw the state of her son. All red and teary eyed.
Vinnie just walked past her, sniffling, and climbed into bed.
„Oh, sweetheart…“ she hummed, closing the door again. Vincent often came to her whenever he had Night terrors or PTSD attacks, she knew what he needed in that moment. So she climbed into bed with him and covered him in her warmed up blanket, pulling the small boy to her chest and brushing over his red curls.
„Shh.. you‘re okay. I got you.“ she cooed softly.