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Chapter Text

There's a painting of Octavian in memoriam kept in Reyna's office. Framed but kept in her desk, away from prying eyes. Every detail is identical to the way he looked while alive, down to those intense eyes that stared right through her. The painting's eyes look through her in the same way. She never thought she'd miss those eyes, but now that he's gone she yearns for the days she was able to see them.

She strokes the painting with her fingertips like how one would stroke their lover's face. Reyna and Octavian were never lovers. She had thought about it but hadn't pursued it.

And now she never can.

Octavian is gone. Gone and he's never coming back.

In the silence of her room she hears his voice, calling her name. "Reyna."

Startled, she looks around. There is no trace of him. Of course there isn't. He's dead.

She hears him call her name again. Reyna gazes down at the painting as if it could be the one calling her. She swears she sees it smirk for one moment. Quickly, she blinks several times to clear her vision and looks at the painting again.

There is no sign of a smirk or anything at all. It is just a painting, after all.

Reyna sets the painting down and rubs at her eyes. "I must be tired. I've begun to see things."

"Perhaps you've finally lost your mind." She hears Octavian's voice again and scrabbles to pick up the painting once again, staring at it intensely.

"You should be careful. The people here will kill you if you show any sign of instability." Octavian says and then the painting smiles at her as if he told a joke.

Reyna must've truly lost her mind. Has grief caused her mind to crumble?

"You..." She tries to say something but cannot find the words. Reyna swallows a lump in her throat and stares at the painting.

"Poor girl. But I can't say you didn't have it coming. After all, you abandoned me at my lowest." The painting says. He does not sound hurt but instead mocking.

Reyna fears she may cry at those words. "I didn't abandon you."

"If not, why am I gone while you're still there?" Octavian says.

"I...." Reyna can't think of a way to argue with him. Guilt gnawed away at her heart. Could she have done something to help him? Would he still be here with her if she had done something different?

"There's no point in wondering what you could've done. It's impossible to go back and save me. What's done is done." Octavian's tone isn't harsh but instead soothing. Or perhaps it just seemed that way to Reyna who missed him more than anything.

"Will I ever see you again?" She asks.

"You're seeing me right now, aren't you?" Octavian answers.

"The real you." Reyna replies.

"I'm afraid this is all that's left of me." Octavian responds and then falls silent.

"Octavian?" Reyna asks, but the painting is no longer speaking to her. It's returned to its usual state.

Reyna must have truly gone mad with grief. Believing a painting was speaking to her, what a true show of her guilty conscious. She tucks the painting back in her desk and goes to lay down for the night. Perhaps some sleep will soothe her, let her forget this incident.

Chapter Text

Perhaps it had all been a hallucination from grief. Reyna had checked on the painting several times the day after but it spoke not a word. She carefully memorized every detail of the painting so she would be able to tell if anything changed.

But nothing did. The portrait looks the same as when she got it.

Reyna stays up late that night, burying herself in her work to stay distracted. She takes out the photo one last time and swears she hears a voice.

"You're going to work yourself to death, dear. But I suppose that wouldn't be all bad as you'd be with me." The painting says with a smile.

"Octavian." Reyna says, her voice cracking as she calls out for him.

"What do you need of me?" The painting responds.

"Octavian, are you really here with me?" Reyna asks, clutching the frame of the portrait tightly.

"What does it seem like?" The painting tells her. "Whatever you believe it is that's what I am."

"I don't know what I believe." Reyna responds.

"Then you have no answer to your question." The painting says almost mockingly.

Reyna touches the painting with her finger tips, wishing she could reach inside and cup Octavian's face in her hand. But that could not happen. Not anymore.

All she has is this painting.

"Lost in thought, dear? I can't imagine that's good for you." The painting of Octavian says. "But I appreciate the sentiment of this."

Octavian understood what her gesture meant. Although she could not care for him like normal she could still care for him.

"I was thinking of you." Reyna tells him.

"How sweet. But you may want to focus on getting to bed. If you'd like you could always dream of me." The painting says.

How Reyna wishes she could control her dreams to do that. But that's simply something she could never do.

However, there is one thing she could do.

Gingerly holding the painting in her hands, careful not to damage it, Reyna heads to her room. She cannot dream of Octavian but she could have him near her. She props the portrait up on her nightside table.

"It's been a while since I've seen the outside world. Perhaps I should thank you for the tour. Not that I could see much." The painting says, grinning naturally this time.

"I have to be careful. If I were to lose you a second time I don't know what I'd do." Reyna makes sure she's facing the painting as she lays down in her bed.

"Perhaps you'd move on. But you don't seem like the type. Perhaps a stronger frame is in order." The painting of Octavian says.

"I can get one of those soon. This time I will definitely protect you." She says, staring at the painting.

"I'll consider myself lucky if you do." The painting replies to her, "But for now you should rest. I can't speak to you if you're too tired to acknowledge me."

Reyna rests her finger tips against the painting one last time before curling up to sleep. As she closes her eyes Reyna thinks of ways she could properly protect Octavian. She cannot lose him again. This time they'll be able to stay with one another forevermore.

Chapter Text

The painting's eyes are on Reyna when she awakes. He's once again unmoving, failing to greet her when she wakes up. Perhaps he is only active late in the day. That's when he usually speaks to Reyna.

She reaches to touch the painting but freezes before it. Is there a point to greeting Octavian when he is not around? He could be idle and waiting for the perfect moment. Reyna's touch could stir the painting to life.

"Good morning," Reyna greets the painting, touching Octavian's cheek.

No response.

"I have to head out soon. I have my duties to fulfill as praetor and I cannot bring you with me. It isn't safe." Reyna continues to speak to the painting despite it not replying so far.

While Reyna would be fine waiting for the painting to come back to her true to what she said she has things to do. She gets up in order to get ready for the day. Reyna briefly wonders if she should turn Octavian away from her while she changes. Even if he is currently silent he may be able to see her still. She hesitates for one moment before deciding it's safe to change around the painting. She had done it last night already and it's not like Octavian speaks to anyone but her.

Ready for the day Reyna says one last thing to the painting before departing, "I'll see you later today," as if the painting would fret while she's gone.

Reyna's not so much haunted by the painting so much as disrupted. Knowing Octavian is stuck in the confines of wherever she leaves him sticks in her mind and distracts her. She could no longer see him when out and about like in the past. If he is not with her Reyna could not see him at all. They've been apart in the past, but this is different. Octavian had other people to entertain him in the past.

Now he only has Reyna.

This could be the way Octavian wants it though. After all, he's only spoken to Reyna so far.

Reyna knows she cannot dwell on this. Not while she has things to do and people to lead.
But she has trouble pushing these thoughts aside. Reyna tries not to let it show she's distracted.

Who would believe her if she told them the reason she could not focus?

It's better for her to tuck these feelings away and get her tasks done. The painting would be waiting for her when she returns. There should be no reason for Reyna to worry.

The painting is there when Reyna returns to her room at the end of the day. Of course it is, where else would it go? It's silly for Reyna to even entertain the idea that it'd be gone.

"I'm back," Reyna says, hoping the painting will greet her in return.

It does not.

It is very like Octavian to not do what Reyna wishes he would. Knowing he's still himself should comfort Reyna, but she'd prefer the comfort of his presence. The painting's stillness provides little comfort for her now that she's aware he can still communicate with her.

"Are you giving me the silent treatment?" Reyna asks, heading over to the painting and picking it up.

Octavian smirks, finally doing something after a day of nothing. "Do you miss me that much when I'm gone? I don't recall you ever being this clingy."

Reyna holds back a sigh of relief. Octavian is still with her. He has not left again.

"I would hardly call myself clingy. We spent the entire day away from one another." Reyna responds.

"Time matters not to me. Not anymore. All I focus on is the here and now." The painting says to her.

"Aren't I the here and now?" Reyna asks.

"I suppose you are. I am your's, after all." Octavian replies.

Hearing Octavian call himself her's feels strange. He was not her's in the past. Before he had died a great distance had formed between him and Reyna. How could he so easily call himself her's now?

"You own the painting. What did you think I was referring to?" Octavian grins. "You looked awfully lost in thought."

So he's teasing her. His sadistic streak still remains. Reyna's not sure if that's a good thing. But as long as Octavian is here she'll accept any of his behaviors, no matter how poor they are.

"You're just like you were." Reyna says.

"You almost sound disappointed. You should be glad I stayed true to myself after all that's happened." Although Octavian doesn't say what happened Reyna knows what he is referring to and a twinge of guilt hurts her heart.

"Not all of your behaviors were pleasant. But I am still glad you're you." Reyna adds that last part so Octavian doesn't take offense. She doesn't want the painting leaving when they had barely spoken today.

"There's no one else I'd rather be." Octavian replies, still as full of himself as always.

"But about you?" Octavian asks, throwing Reyna for a loop. "Are you still you after everything you've been through?"

Reyna furrows her brow. It's an odd question. She doesn't believe she's lost herself even with everything that's happened. Yes, she has changed, but people always change. That doesn't mean she's no longer herself.

"What do you mean?" Reyna asks.

"You'll get it someday. Since you don't let's focus on me for now." Octavian replies, expertly dodging the question.

"And how shall we do that?" Reyna responds playfully. She doesn't mind not dwelling on his question. Reyna's not in the mood for introspection.

"There's so many ways. How ever could I choose?" Octavian says faux dramatically. "I suppose there's only so much time in the day and you must sleep eventually so I should make up my mind."

There's an uncomfortable feeling in Reyna's stomach as she's reminded they must part. She could always refrain from sleeping but Reyna knows that will impact her tomorrow. Even if she'd like to spend more time with Octavian, there will always be a time where they must part.

She can only hope it won't be for good again.

"You should make up your mind. You'll receive nothing if you don't." Reyna says.

"Ooh, I'm being rushed. How terrible~" Octavian continues the faux dramatics.

This is his way of being playful and Reyna enjoys his attempts at doing so. She does not need more negatives in her life. This rare positive is enough to make it feel like her heart isn't falling apart, a temporary relief from pain.

"If you want attention in a certain way you must tell me how. I cannot read your mind." Reyna says.

"And I doubt you'd want to." Octavian laughs at his own joke.

It's been so long since Reyna has heard that laugh. There's a mix of joy and pain in her heart. How pleasant it is to hear that laugh again. How awful it is what it took to hear it.

"Was my joke that bad?" Octavian asks.

Reyna must've been silent for too long. She hadn't meant to be. But her mind had been elsewhere, consumed by her emotions.

"You're no comedian, but it wasn't terrible." Reyna replies.

Octavian rolls his eyes. "Everyone's a critic."

"I care to argue you're the harshest critic out there." Reyna playfully jabs at him.

"It's part of my charm." Octavian says with a wink.

He's more animated than he used to be. Back when he was always surrounded by people Octavian kept his real feelings hidden to please the people more. Now he's letting it all show like he used to when they were alone.

"But I suppose it's time for you to turn in for the night." Octavian says.

"What?" Reyna asks. The time they had spent together today is so short. How could it already be done?

"You'll be miserable tomorrow if you stay up too late. Remember, you have an empire to lead. You must stay on your game." Octavian replies.

Reyna doesn't want to sleep. She doesn't want their time together to be over.

She doesn't want to be alone.

"Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?" Reyna asks.

She knows if she were to deny Octavian telling her to sleep he could simply leave. Their time together would be up either way. Perhaps by doing this she could extend the time he spends by her side.

"What a silly request." Octavian says. "But I suppose I can. I can stay with you as long as we both wish."

It's relieving to hear that Octavian's willing to listen to her. But more so, it's good to hear Octavian confirm he has no plans to leave. He's willing to stay with Reyna this time.

And that's all she needs.

Chapter Text

"You've left me awfully lonely today." The painting says the moment Reyna enters her room.

"I have a duty to fulfill." She replies, sitting on her bed and picking up the painting.

"You'll work yourself to death at this rate." Octavian feigns dramatics then follows it up with, "At least we'll be together that way." He winks.

"You jest." Reyna says, frowning at the painting as if it could really see her emotions.

Judging by how the painting responds Reyna's sure it must be able to, "Oh boo, here I was hoping to spend an eternity with you."

"I cannot abandon this place. The people here need me." Reyna responds.

"Whatever you say. But if you hope to remain in New Rome you should probably start some sort of self care regime. Or, as I said, you'll work yourself to death." Octavian replies with no sign of jest or dramatics.

"How do you presume I do that?" Reyna asks, even if Octavian had no ideas what he says would at least be entertaining.

"Who knows~" The painting chimes, "If you don't come up with it yourself is it really self care? Besides, I doubt my indulgences would please you."

This answer is a lot less entertaining than Reyna had hoped.

"What did you used to engage in?" Reyna asks.

"Are you curious about my life now that I'm gone~" Octavian teases, like his life lost is nothing more than a joke. "Too bad! You have to find your own life to live."

How cruel of him, Reyna thinks. The life she had lived with Jason and Octavian has since vanished. She does not know what she has now nor does she know how to rebuild.

"You haven't a single suggestion?" She questions, knowing full well she could not change his mind.

"Not any you could use, that is. Our lifestyles were simply too different." The painting says, using the term "were" to enforce the fact he is gone.

"I could learn to love how you live." Reyna says, as if Octavian was still alive.

He is still alive to her. Here, with this painting, Reyna is still with Octavian. He is not dead yet because as long as they're still together Octavian is alive.

"Don't force yourself. You're meant to find yourself joy and my lifestyle would not bring you any." The painting says, more solemn, as if he would freeze up again. As if he would return to his inanimate state.

Reyna clutches the painting tighter, she does not want Octavian to go just yet. They have barely spoken today.

"What should I do?" She asks, trying to quell the panic that he'd leave her so soon.

"Something you enjoy. If there is anything you enjoy besides combat." Octavian tells her.

"I enjoy speaking to you." Reyna replies honestly.

"You can speak with me all you'd like." He says and Reyna feels herself relax. He's not going yet. "It's not like I can leave you. I'll be with you forevermore."

What Octavian said may have been his attempt to sound dark or foreboding, but Reyna did not take it as such. She's happy to know he'll continue to be with her as long as she wants and she wants to be with him as long as she lives. That is her ideal. That is her self care.

"You look awfully pleased." The painting notes.

"I am." Reyna replies.

"What a strange girl you are, taking pleasure in speaking to a painting." Octavian says.

"It's not that I'm speaking to a painting. It's that I'm speaking to you." Reyna responds, hoping her feelings got across to him. Or, is it more accurate to say, her wants. Her wants to be with him.

"Is that so~" Octavian replies with a sing song voice once again. He too must take joy in their conversations.

If he didn't he wouldn't stick around, right? Octavian is happy with her. And Reyna is happy with him. That's how it'll stay.

"Should I stay with you until you sleep again?" The painting asks her.

Reyna nods. "It would be pleasant if you did."

Octavian hums. "I suppose I can keep you company."

Reyna smiles softly, "Thank you." She says, soothed at his offer and more so at the sound of his voice.

"It's not like I have anything better to do." Octavian shrugs, but his attempts at dismissing his own actions fail to take away Reyna's appreciation for them.

"Even still, I appreciate your company." Reyna tells him. She tells him things she should've told him in life.

"Of course you do, who wouldn't?" Octavian jests with a grin.

Reyna props the painting up where she had last night so it can keep her company till she rests. So Octavian will have his eyes on her and no one else. And that's the way things will stay evermore.