Chapter Text
His mind, Riku’s well aware, is really not a place he can actually delve into; in that respect, it’s imaginary, only seen by the mind’s own eye.
That one time, when Ansem was able to take control of his body, use him for his own wishes and purposes—- he’d been locked in the darkest corner of his own mind and his Heart, left to choke and suffer and burn under his own sins and punishment.
It had been intoxicating in the worst of ways, like ashes and embers making their way into his throat except not; like he was a little figure inside his own head, eyes able to see nothing but himself and the Darkness swirling around him.
In that way, too, he could see and hear everything going on – words he was saying but it wasn’t really him, the sharp sound of metal on metal and the screeching protests and flickering sparks.
He’s easily able to suffocate, here in this crevice of his heart and his mind that has been corrupted and cracked by Darkness, tendrils of which are slithering around his skin in a way that’s hardly kind, ghosting around his throat like fingers of a lover’s caress that also threatens to choke and kill.
He’s left demented here, fighting against what he can’t really see and can hardly touch, half-gloved fingers ( imaginary, like the rest of it, though it all feels so real ) reaching for something, anything, whatever can possibly help him through—-
There.
And there is it; a flicker of light, like a spark, an ember of flame, threatening to consume all that dares hurt him – it’s far, extremely so, but if it’s his redemption, he’s reaching for it—
The thought lingers, of whether or not he truly deserves such salvation, and his fingers temporarily hesitate; but a strong, loud call reaches out to him, echoes in his ears, and he reaches that little bit further—
“Riku!”
And perhaps it’s his imagination, hearing both him and her call for him; but if there’s one thing he’s learned, travelling through the Darkness and looking back on his own mistakes, it’s that he wants to see them again.
Just one more time.
Then, he’ll willingly sink back into this Hell, if he could only help them and save them and let them be happy.
Even if it’s without him.