Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Ticktock added sheep, backarcher, and 21 others

Ticktock: :]

Emo boy: What is this

Backarcher: hello
Why am I called backarcher

Ticktock: don’t worry abt it

TheLorax: Hello Wind Archer :)

Backarcher: hello father

Sigma: hey windyyyyyyyyy~~~~~~ 😼😼😼😼😼

Simp1: GAY 🫵

Backarcher: wtt

Elsa left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Ticktock added Elsa to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Elsa: let me leave

Ticktock: no

Emo boy left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Elsa left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Ticktock added Emo boy and Elsa to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Ticktock: you are staying

Emo boy: what is the purpose of this

Ticktock: it is funny

Alcoholic: ift kmda ish

Simp2: she means ‘it kinda is’

Simp1: WHO’S THE OTHER SIMP

Ticktock: Pitaya

Sheep: Who’s Simp1? :)

Ticktock: shadow milk

Simp1: I’m going to kill myself

Backarcher: WHY IS HE HERE

Sigma: wait you know other guys? :<

Backarcher: stfu

Simp1: he’s more of a simp than me :(

Sheep: Shadow Milk, while there are times to lie, this is not one :)

Simp1: kys

Sheep: That’s not very nice :(

Bitch: You are cookies

TheLorax: hi Longan :)

Simp1: how is that relevant to anything

Ticktock: longan hates cookies and wants them to be eradicated

Flour: While I agree with their want for the cookies to be cleansed from this world, their hate is unnecessary. Embrace the enlightenment of apathy and release your selfish greed

GreedCheese: I feel targeted

Emo boy left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Ticktock added Emo boy to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Flour: of course the cookie with meaningless resolution is here

Emo boy: of course the cookie with weak apathy is here

Bald: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

GreedCheese: shut up you depressed bitch

Bald: IM NOT DEPRESSED YOU FUCKASS BIRD I HOPE YOU DIE

The Lorax: I think you should all calm down :)

Sheep: I agree :)

Simp1: nobody loves you

Lesbian: liar

Simp1: NO SHIT SHERLOCK

Seakisser: can you all shush I’m trying to sleep :<

Simp1: no

Lesbian: no

Bald: no

Sigma: no

GreedCheese: no

Ticktock: no

Midget: no
Hang on
IM NOT THAT SHORT

Pineapple: kys

Midget: WHAT DID I DO

Pineapple: exist

Simp2: hi lychee
Kys

Yuri: Kys

Midget: YOU TOO? 3:

Simp1: everyone here is a hater 3:

Pineapple: oh no they use :3 and 3:

Simp1: UwU

Midget: OwO

Simp2: I don’t like this anymore

Emo boy: how did you like it to begin with

Ticktock: rude

Chapter Text

FemaleZeus: HEAVEN SPLITTER IS ROARING IN ANTICIPATION

Emo boy: oh no

Elsa: oh no

Sigma: oh no

FemaleZeus: fire spirit why 3:

Pineapple: OH NO

Midget: :3

Simp1: :3

FemaleZeus: :3

EldritchHorror: ew

Bald: wait who is ElgichHoror

GreedCheese: YOU HAD IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU AND YOU MISSPELLED IT
DIPSHIT

Ticktock: EldritchHorror is Black Pearl

Bald: I hate pearls

EldritchHorror: if you step near the ocean I will drown you like countless others before

Bald: Nevermind pearls are cool

Emo boy: why does she get a cool name but I’m emo

Ticktock: because she’s my wife

Emo boy: .

Bald: WAIT SHE’S MARRIED?

GreedCheese: no fucking way he liked her

Bald: I NEVER SAID THAT GO DIE IN A HOLE

Simp1: He wants you to die in his hole:

Bald: WHAT

GreedCheese: WHAT

Simp1: after you beat the shit out of him he gained a crush on you
Not that he’d ever stand a chance, ugly fuck

Bald: bitch we used to fuck wdym ugly :(

Simp1: shut up bottom

Ticktock: I have no regrets

GreedCheese: ew does he have a pain kink

Emo boy: yes

GreedCheese: HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT

Simp1: no way balding rice has game

GreedCheese: mfer if you two are together I’m gonna kill you

Emo boy: .. no

Simp1: I call cap

Emo boy: I’m outside your house

Simp1: WHAT

GreedCheese: I’m coming for u

Simp1: HUH

GreedCheese: not you
Dark cacao

Sheep: it’s not that bad :)

GreedCheese: .

Bald: 😼

GreedCheese: WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR POLYCULE

Sheep: I THOUGHT WE SEPERATED AFTER THE DARK FLOUR WAR?

GreedCheese: WDYM?

Sheep: oh right we thought you were dead when that happened-

GreedCheese: I LOVED YOU

Bald: for the first time I kinda feel bad

Eyeball: this is the second chapter calm down

Bald: WDYM CHAPTER?

Bitch: that is not relevant right now. Dragon eye, do not bring it up again

Eyeball: ok

Yuri: wait hang on
Dragon eye explain yourself

Eyeball: what needs explaining?

Yuri: why are you following their orders?

Eyeball: why wouldn’t I be? They are my creator

Yuri: LONGAN YOU HAVE A CHILD?

Bitch: I would not describe them as my child

Yuri: okay..
Dragon eye, you care about pond Dino, correct?

Eyeball: of course! ^^

Yuri: they would kill pond Dino if they could

Eyeball: if that is their wish then I suppose I must be incorrect

Yuri: that is not what I meant

Bitch: too bad so sad

Chapter Text

Moonkisser: I miss my wife

Seakisser: I miss you too <3

Moonkisser: <3

Bald: imagine having a wife

Moonkisser: isn’t that a bad thing..?

Simp1: he’s gay

Bald: I’m bi actually

Simp1: and I’m a frying pan stfu

Sheep: What do you mean, you’re a frying pan?

Ticktock: 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

Sheep: How is being gay related to frying pans?

Simp1: IM PANSEXUAL DIPSHIT

Sheep: Oh, sorry
I was only trying to be interested :(

Bald: that’s very disrespectful

Emo boy: 🙂‍↕️

Moonkisser: what is going on?

Elsa: they’re being weird

Sigma: DID SOMEONE SAY FIYAH

Elsa: no

Sigma: ssssh
ANYWAY IM BURNING HOT

Bald: did you steal my son’s dialogue

Sigma: no

Simp2: Fire Spirit we’ve talked about this :(

Sigma: NO WE HAVEN’T

Simp2: sorry guys he has a lying problem

Sigma: THIS IS GASLIGHTING

Simp2: he likes to act like I’m doing bad things, I’m just trying to help him :(

Sigma: THIS IS ALL FALSE INFORMATION??

TheLorax: no it’s true

Sigma: WHAT DO YOU MEAN
YOU ARE THE LAST PERSON I’D EXPECT TO LIE ABOUT THIS
WHY
TREESUS ROOTS

TheLorax: I’m already here

Sigma: STFU

Backarcher: fire spirit

Sigma: WHAT

Backarcher: fire spirit

Simp2: he is truely insane 😔

Sigma: I’m stealing snapdragon

Simp2: DON’T YOU DARE

Bitch: who is snapdragon

Simp2: STAY AWAY FROM THEM YOU GENOCIDAL PEICE OF SHIT

Flour: *piece

Simp2: Fuck you

Flour: please don’t

Simp2: can’t argue with that

Emo boy left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Elsa left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Seakisser left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Moonkisser left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Bitch left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Eyeball left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Midget left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Ticktock added Emo boy, Elsa, and five others

Elsa: I hate this

Emo boy: me too

TheLorax: Longan why did you try to leave?

Bitch: why wouldn’t I?

TheLorax: I’m here

Bitch: we have DMs

TheLorax: right I forgot

Ticktock: damn that whole family has terrible taste

Backarcher: you cant say anything

Ticktock: MY WIFE IS BEAUTIFUL

EldritchHorror: <3

Ticktock: <3
Wanna commit murder

EldritchHorror: I thought you’d never ask

Yuri: everyone here has their significant other here with them
I do not

Simp2: wait who is it

Yuri: who tf do you think it is

Simp2: idk??

Yuri: you’re a dumbass

Pineapple: is it hydrangea cookie?

Yuri: congratulations you’re smarter than the piss baby

Midget: wait I’m not a piss baby?

Yuri: no you’re just piss

Midget: kys

Yuri: no you

Chapter Text

Simp2: IM GETTING HIIIIIIIIGH

Pineapple: DO NOT
FIRE SPIRIT STOP THEM

Sigma: IM DOING IT TO >:DDDDD

Yuri: this parent son bonding is concerning
Better than none, I suppose

Sigma: I FEEL LIKE IM FLYING

Simp2: YOU ARE FLYING

Sigma: WEEEEEEE

Backarcher: WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I CAN SEE THE FLAMES FROM HERE

Sigma: YOU SHOULD GET HIGH

Backarcher: I AM NOT

Pineapple: YOU LIVE CLOSER TO THEM
STOP THIS

Bitch: so this is what dragons do in my absence?

Pineapple: KYS

Backarcher: FIRE SPIRIT IM COMING OVER

Pineapple: WHAT ABOUT SNAPDRAGON

Simp2: wdym
OH THEY’RE WITH HOLLYBERRY :D

Alcoholic: They are

Backarcher: I’ve arrived. Turns out it was just sugar

Sigma: I’m vibrating :]

Yuri: .. I do not know what I expected

Backarcher: I’m going home

Sigma: NO DON’T LEAVE ME WHILE IM HIGH

Backarcher: ITS SUGAR

Lesbian: I’m sugar :)

Elsa: no shit

FemaleZeus: hi frost queen :]

Elsa: do not speak to me

Sigma: Stormbringer does not have rizz
Unlike me

FemaleZeus: SYBAU

Sigma: NEVER
SUCK MY DICK

FemaleZeus: ISN’T THAT WIND ARCHER’S JOB

Backarcher: no

Sigma: :(

Backarcher: I was not aware you wanted that

Sigma: ANYWAY

TheLorax: it’s nothing to be embarrassed about :)

Backarcher: .

Sigma: I’m vibrating again :]

Simp2: I BELIEVE I CAN FLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Pineapple: WIND ARCHER I THOUGHT YOU WERE HELPING?

Backarcher: I AM NOT DEALING WITH A SUGAR HIGH DRAGON
YOU DEAL WITH THEM

Pineapple: FINE

Simp2: YOU SHOULD GET HIIIIIIIIIIIIGH

Pineapple: NO

Sigma: IM FLYING

Backarcher: GET BACK HERE

Sigma: NEVER

Pineapple: PITAYA IS CURRENTLY EATING THE GROUND WHAT THE FUCK

Yuri: Of course they are

Simp2: I FELL AND I CANT GET UP
HELP

Pineapple: MAYBE IF YOU TURNED BACK INTO A COOKIE INSTEAD OF A RIDICULOUSLY LARGE DRAGON I’D BE ABLE TO

Simp2: YOU’RE A DRAGON TOO

Pineapple: I’M SMALLER THAN YOU

Simp2: SHORT 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵

Pineapple: JUST BECAUSE MY TRUE FORM IS SMALLER DOESN’T MEAN MY COOKIE FORM IS

Simp2: THAT’S IRRELEVANT
DON’T BE A LYCHEE

Midget: KYS

Bitch: cease your constant squabbling, you act like children

Yuri: I think I’m the only normal one

TheLorax: what’s wrong with Longan?
Wait
Nevermind

Yuri: exactly

Backarcher: can someone help, fire spirit is actively trying to break through a cliff wall
I don’t think he realises how strong rock is

Simp2: ILL HELP HIM

Backarcher: NOT WHAT I MEANT

Pineapple: I THOUGHT YOU WERE STUCK

Simp2: I LIED

Simp1: Great job

Simp2: KYS

Simp1: WHAT DID I DO

Sheep: :)

Simp1: oh
HOW DOES THAT AFFECT YOU

Simp2: it doesn’t affect me but it affects my wife

Simp1: simp🫵

Simp2: CAN YOU SEE YOUR NAME

Simp1: CAN YOU SEE YOURS?

Simp2: FUCK YOU IM COMING OVER

Sigma: CAN I COME

Simp2: HELL YEAH

Simp1: I FEEL TARGETED

Backarcher: for once I feel inclined to join their revenge

Simp1: Greenie whyyyyyyy

Backarcher: you disrupt the force of nature

Simp1: actually dark enchantress did that
WAIT NO THEY’RE AT THE SPIRE
HELP
PLEASE
THEYRE GONNA KILL ME
CHAT WE SCREWED

Simp2: >:D

Ticktock: I’m so proud of myself :]

Chapter Text

Emo boy: dark choco told me to listen to my chemical romance
My ears are bleeding

EldritchHorror: MCR IS PEAK FUCK YOU
IM GONNA DROWN YOU IF YOU STEP FOOT NEAR THE OCEAN

Toxicyuri1: I love mcr

Yuri: WHY IS THERE A TOXIC YURI
WHO ARE YOU

Toxicyuri1: I’m Dark Enchantress

TheLorax: I did not realise you were here :)

Toxicyuri1: KYS

TheLorax: :(

Bitch: Do not disrespect him again

Toxicyuri1: or what

Bitch: you will never see the light of day again

TheLorax: it’s fine don’t worry :)
I’m fine :)

Bitch: alright

Toxicyuri2: hello everyone :)
I haven’t been active here much, sorry :(

Toxicyuri1: IF THIS IS WHO I THINK IT IS

Toxicyuri2: I’m white lily

Toxicyuri1: KYS
KYS
KYS
KYS
KYS
KYS
KYS

Alcoholic: why don’t you kys
White lily didn’t do anything

Bitch: I want to kill her

Alcoholic: me, dark enchantress or white lily?

Bitch: dark enchantress
And all of you but mostly dark enchantress

Simp2: WHY DO YOU TWO GET ALONG
LONGAN WHY ARE YOU BEING NICE
YOU’RE NEVER NICE

Bitch: what do you mean?

Ticktock changed Bitch to Niceguy

Niceguy: what

TheLorax: you are very nice :)

Ticktock: I meant that as in the guys on twitter that say ‘nice guys finish last ’ despite not being nice at all
But ok

TheLorax: what is twitter

Niceguy: you don’t want to know

Ticktock: no way are you on twitter

Niceguy: no

Ticktock: damn

Sigma: WHY DONT I KNOW WHAT TWITTER IS??

Eyeball: skill issue

Niceguy: never say that again

Eyeball: ok :3

FemaleZeus: :3

Midget: :3

Simp1: :3

Pineapple: WHY DO YOU DO THIS

Midget: you seem very angry OwO

Simp1: I bet I can help UwU

Pineapple: EW

Midget: shadow milk went too far

Simp1: WHY

Yuri: you do realise all the dragons are related and you just continued what they said into a fairly sexual sentence

Simp1: I DIDN’T MEAN IT SEXUALLY

Sheep: lie

Simp1: SINCE WHEN WERE YOU A LIE DETECTOR
FUCK YOU

Sheep: I bet you would

Bald: real

Simp1: WHAT

GreedCheese: pure vanilla why

Emo boy: you gotta do what you gotta do

GreedCheese: AND YOU GOTTA DO HIM?

Simp2: LMAO

Alcoholic: I think you all need to chill a bit
I understand that you have had problems in the past, but I think dark cacao and pure vanilla deserve to be happy :)

Lesbian: I love you

Alcoholic: oh

Simp2: SHE’S TAKEN

Lesbian I’m gonna kms

Alcoholic: don’t do that
That’s not good
We can be friends :)

Lesbian: I DONT WANNA BE FRIENDS

Simp1: skill issue

Lesbian: BITCH YOU HAVE THE CRAZIEST ONE SIDED BEEF WITH SOMEONE THAT ASKED TO BE YOUR FRIEND
AND YOU LOVE HIM TOO

Flour: this is meaningless

Emo boy: for once I agree

Moonkisser: any time I consider talking here I open the group chat and I am instantly reminded of why I don’t

Seakisser: you should come over :]

Moonkisser: I can’t rn :(

Seakisser: aw ok :(
Maybe another time?

Moonkisser: sure :]

Ticktock: ew they’re so wholesome in every way
They don’t even murder people

EldritchHorror: disgusting

Ticktock: real

Lesbian: LOVE ME

Seakisser: what

Ticktock: HATE ME

EldritchHorror: SAY WHAT YOU WANT ABOUT ME

Moonkisser: BUT ALL OF THE BOYS AND ALL OF THE GIRLS

Sigma: BUT ALL OF THE BOYS AND ALL OF THE GIRLS ARE BEGGING TO F U C K ME

Seakisser: I’m confused

Moonkisser: it’s a song :]

Seakisser: oooh

Bald: why is everyone gay

Sigma: you are too

Bald: that’s not relevant
There are more straight people on earthbread why is there so many gays here

Sigma: when did you get smart

Bald: I’m smart :(

Simp1: he puts his IQ towards random things that don’t get noticed
Like backshots

Bald: yeah
WAIT WHAT
I DIDNT SEE THAT

Sheep: he’s not lying
Surprisingly
This is progress :D I knew you could do it!

Simp1: kys

Sheep: still progress :D

Simp1: STOP TRYING TO SEE THE BEST IN PEOPLE IM FUCKING EVIL

Bald: Who’s evil

Simp1: WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

Flour: your anger is meaningless

Simp1: RETURN TO FLOUR BITCH

Flour: that is not how it works

Niceguy: I can turn you to stone

TheLorax: don’t do that

Niceguy: I’m getting permission

TheLorax: it’s still murder

Niceguy: so?

TheLorax: :(

Chapter Text

FemaleZeus: I wish my wife loved me

Moonkisser: WHEN DID YOU GET MARRIED?

FemaleZeus: Recently, but she doesn’t know it yet

Moonkisser: oh
That’s lovely

Lesbian: that’s so real

Simp2: SHES FUCKING TAKEN

Lesbian: KYS

Simp2: KYS

FemaleZeus: I love my wife

Moonkisser: I don’t think she’s your wife

FemaleZeus: ssssh

Elsa: I am inclined to step in for this woman’s safety
Who is it

FemaleZeus is offline

Moonkisser: oh

Elsa: what

Moonkisser is offline

Seakisser: since when did we get notifications for that? Or like a message

Ticktock: I turned them on out of curiosity. I’m turning them off now that was hilarious

Elsa: I am still confused

Ticktock: you’re the wife

FemaleZeus: FUCK YOU

EldritchHorror: THATS MY JOB KYS

FemaleZeus: RUDE

Sigma: sticking out your gyatt for the rizzler

Elsa: kys

Ticktock: kys

EldritchHorror: kys

Sigma: the ladies do not love me

Backarcher: and you don’t love them

Sigma: I love you
No homo

Backarcher: .

Ticktock: wind archer your boyfriend doesn’t love you

Backarcher: damn

TheLorax: it’s okay wind archer :)

Sigma: I apologise for my actions

Simp2: I raised you wrong
Never apologise
Violence is key

Sigma: oh right
IM GONNA BURN A FOREST

Backarcher: NO

Sigma: :(
I’m gonna burn the tree

TheLorax: is that me

Sigma: yes

TheLorax: please don’t
Longan is watching my phone over my shoulder

Sigma: OH SORRY LONGAN

Niceguy: kys

Midget: you did it
You used internet slang

Niceguy: why does this interest you

Midget: FUCK YOU

Niceguy: I am unaware of what I did

TheLorax: I think they’re annoyed because you didn’t express annoyance or excitement, or anything deemed entertaining

Niceguy: I suppose that makes sense

Sigma: why do you text like you’re British

Niceguy: what do you mean

Sigma: nvm

Simp2: I miss my wife
And my child

Sigma: I’m right next to you?

Simp2: my other child
I’d never miss you

Sigma: fair enough

TheLorax: that’s was disrespectful :(

Simp2: idgaf

TheLorax: :(

Ticktock changed TheLorax to TreesusRoots

Sigma: the legal name is crazy

TreesusRoots: that’s not my legal name
My name is Millennial Tree Cookie

Sigma: it’s a joke

TreesusRoots: oh, now that I realise that, it was funny! Haha

Sigma: WHO SAYS HAHA UNIRONICALLY

TreesusRoots: what’s wrong with it :(

Sigma: everything

TreesusRoots: oh, okay :(

Chapter Text

Sigma: I am here today to give everyone a brainrot lesson, by request of Millennial Tree :]

Backarcher: You do not expect us to believe he wanted to learn brainrot

TreesusRoots: what’s up my skibidi sigmas :D
Did I do it right

Backarcher: yes, but never do that again

TreesusRoots: why not :(

Backarcher: just don’t

Sigma: anyway, I’m trying to teach you

TreesusRoots: sorry, please continue :)

Sigma: first off, I’ll start by translating my name into old people language
Sigma=a person that has a lot of rizz and has an awesome jawline

TreesusRoots: what is rizz?

Sigma: rizz is short for charisma, however has more sus implications
Sus means suspicious
But in this case ‘sus implications’ means sexual/romantic implications

TreesusRoots: @Niceguy do I have ‘rizz’

Niceguy: I’m disappointed in you

TreesusRoots: :(

Sigma: that’s not very nice
Anyway :D
Skibidi is referring to skibidi toilet, a toilet that has a head sticking out of the bowl
It is sometimes used to say ‘I’m so skibidi’ which is similar to saying ‘I’m so sigma’

TreesusRoots: someone once called my hairline ‘chopped’ what does that mean?

Sigma: I’m not answering that

TreesusRoots: is it a good thing?

Sigma: no

TreesusRoots: :(

Bald: at least you don’t get called bald

TreesusRoots: I do get called bald

Bald: SKILL ISSUE

TreesusRoots: not to be rude, however, your name is bald?

Bald: STFU BITCH

GreedCheese: KYS

Bald: KYS

GreedCheese: I HOPE YOUR DEATH IS SLOW AND PAINFUL

Bald: SAME

GreedCheese: You want to die?

Bald is offline

Ticktock: I thought it’d be funny
Again

Sheep: he needs therapy :(

GreedCheese: I agree, but for different reasons

Ticktock: should we book him a therapy session

Sheep: sure :)

Ticktock: this’ll be hilarious

Sheep: why is therapy funny?

Ticktock: dw about it

Chapter Text

Sheep: we’re at therapy
Burning spice is acting like a rabid dog
He doesn’t want to be there, but it’s good for him :(
He’s trying to escape

GreedCheese: how tf are you keeping him here

Sheep: dark cacao has got him

GreedCheese: that makes sense
Hang on isn’t dark cacao only up to his shoulders?

Emo boy: you underestimate me

GreedCheese: HOW ARE YOU TEXTING AND HOLDING HIM IN PLACE AT THE SAME TIME?

Sheep: oh I have his phone, he told me to say that :)

GreedCheese: oh

Sheep: they fell over
But the therapist is here :D

GreedCheese: who’s the therapist?

Sheep: Sage

GreedCheese: who tf is that

Sheep: alternate dimension shadow milk that isn’t evil

GreedCheese: why am I not surprised

Sheep: anyway I need to go now :)

GreedCheese: bye :]

EldritchHorror: @Ticktock you were right this is hilarious

Ticktock: I KNEW IT
LMAO

Bald: kys

Ticktock: stop projecting

Niceguy kicked Bald from ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Ticktock: WHAT THE FUCK
MY ADMIN RIGHTS
THEY’RE GONE
YOU TOOK THEM
MOTHERFUCKER

Niceguy: I do not fuck mothers

Ticktock: no you fuck wind archers father

Backarcher: .
Fuck both of you

Niceguy: are you telling us to fuck?

Backarcher: NO??
WHERE DID YOU GET THAT IDEA
oh

Ticktock: This is hilarious but give me my admin back

Yuri: I got you

Yuri gifted Ticktock admin

Ticktock: thank you but how did you get admin

Yuri: I have my ways

Niceguy removed Ticktock and Yuri from admin

Yuri: BITCH

Ticktock: WHEN WAS THAT SOMETHING ADMINS COULD DO?

Niceguy: I am not admin
I am the owner of the group chat now, therefore I am above admin

Ticktock: I WAS THE OWNER?

Niceguy: Was, not are

Ticktock: WHAT DID YOU DO

Niceguy: that is not your problem

Yuri kicked Niceguy from ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Niceguy: no

Ticktock: TF?
YOU CAN’T JUST SAY NO

Niceguy: I did

Yuri added Bald to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Bald: I JUST SCROLLED UP
TF HAPPENED

Yuri gifted ✨✨The Gays✨✨ to Ticktock

Ticktock: thank you :]

Yuri: it was unjust for it to be taken

Sheep: Burning spice escaped and we can’t find him
Help

Ticktock: LMAO

Sheep: please

Ticktock: no

Chapter Text

Emo boy: burning spice is on the run
We can’t find him

Ticktock: ITS BEEN A WHOLE DAY?

Emo boy: you can view the timelines, surely you can find him

Ticktock: this isn’t my problem

Pineapple: I think I found him

Emo boy: Where is he?

Pineapple: on my island
He’s trying to hide in the bushes

Midget: HOW DID HE GET THERE? DOESN’T HE LIVE ON CRISPIA

Pineapple: he realised I spotted him and he’s running

Emo boy: can you stop him

Pineapple: sure

Sheep: thank you! :)

Pineapple: got him
He’s very loud

Emo boy: unfortunately he is

Sheep: unfortunately? I thought you loved him

Emo boy: I do, but he gives me a headache

Sheep: oh, fair enough :)

Pineapple: what do I do with him
Nevermind he stabbed my talon and I dropped him

Sheep: WHERE IS HE 😱

Pineapple: idk, he’s hiding
It is no longer my problem. If you wish for me to search for him I want something in return

Emo boy: I will come look for him

Sheep: are you sure? Will your kingdom be ok without you?

Emo boy: I’ll leave Caramel Arrow in charge

Sheep: alright :)
Are you ok by yourself?

Emo boy: I’m taking crunchy chip

Sheep: that’s good, he’s good at tracking right? :)

Emo boy: yes, he is :)

Chapter Text

Ticktock added DoomedYaoi

Simp1: IF THATS WHO I THINK IT IS IM GONNA DIE OF LAUGHTER

Ticktock: everyone say hi to silent salt

Simp1: CACKLING
IMAGINE HAVING A DEAD HUSBAND
SKILL ISSUE

Bald: L L L L L L L

Lesbian: No matter what happened, we’re still friends
Be nice :<

DoomedYaoi: I assume you are the beasts

Simp1: WOW WHO WOULD’VE THOUGHT

Sheep: I would like to apologise of behalf of shadow milk, I haven’t seen him like this since I was truthless recluse :(

DoomedYaoi: do not feel guilt on his behalf, he has always been this way

Sheep: Still, as his ancient counterpart I feel somewhat responsible for him

Simp1: BITCH DEAL WITH YOUR DEPRESSED BOYFRIENDS OR KYS

Sheep: CALM TF DOWN

Simp1: ok damn 💔

Ticktock: live footage of pure vanilla yelling
🔥🔥🔥

Emo boy: despite how long I have been with him, this is a surprise

Bald: idk whether to feel victorious or concerned
On one hand: anger, on the other hand: he’s my boyfriend

DoomedYaoi: I did not expect to see conflict within you for a matter like this

EldritchHorror: he texts like he’s British

DoomedYaoi: what does that mean?

Sheep: It means you use proper grammar and use ‘complicated words’
I think it’s perfectly normal :)

EldritchHorror: that’s because you do it too

Sheep: Do I?

Ticktock: BITCH YOU USE CAPITALISATION FOR SOMETHING OTHER THAN YELLING

Bald: STOP CALLING HIM A BITCH FOR TWO SECONDS

Ticktock: KYS

Bald: KYS

Sheep: it’s fine don’t worry :)
I know she doesn’t mean it rudely

Ticktock: should I add elder faeries ghost to the group chat?

EldritchHorror: YOU CAN DO THAT?

Ticktock: Yessssss :D

EldritchHorror: do it >:]

Ticktock: alr gimme a sec

Chapter Text

Ticktock added DeadYaoi to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Simp1: KYS

Ticktock: he’s literally dead

Simp1: KYS FOR THE SECOND TIME

DeadYaoi left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

ToxicYuri2: poor elder faerie..

Ticktock added DeadYaoi to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

DeadYaoi: I do not wish to be here
Spending time with the beasts is worse than spending my afterlife alone

Simp1: skill issue

DoomedYaoi: Hello, Elder Faerie
Despite everything, I’m glad that you are here

DeadYaoi: you should not be
I failed my duty

DoomedYaoi: as did I, there is always time to try to fix the past

DeadYaoi: you say that you’ve fallen, yet it is as if nothing has changed

Ticktock: can we agree that this is gay

DeadYaoi: WHAT

Simp1: yes we can
It always was

DeadYaoi: I know there are good cookies on here, do not be fooled by their lies

DoomedYaoi: ignore them, everyone on here is stupid

Sheep: I agree with the ignore them part, but not everyone is stupid :)
Also hi Elder Faerie! It’s me, Pure Vanilla

DeadYaoi: so you have been placed in this witches forsaken group chat as well

Sheep: It’s not that bad :)

Pineapple: lies
Fire spirit and Pitaya got high on here

Backarcher: a reminder that it was sugar

DeadYaoi: who is backarcher

Backarcher: I am wind archer

DeadYaoi: I see the elemental guardians are here too

Sigma: BURNING HOT

Bald: STOP STEALING MY SONS DIALOGUE

Sigma: NO

Bald: KYS

Sigma: KYS

Sheep: Stop telling each other to kill themselves, you never know what someone’s going through :(

ToxicYuri2: I think it would be difficult to get those two to stop
I could be wrong though..

Sheep: you are probably right, but I want to try :)

ToxicYuri1: everyone here should die

Bald: ARENT WE ON THE SAME SIDE?

ToxicYuri1: oh yeah sorry :)

Simp1: she’s being nice something is off
MY FELLOW BEASTS I THINK DARK ENCHANTRESS MAY BETRAY US

DoomedYaoi: you only just realised?
She hungers for power, why would she keep us around if we’re more powerful than her?

Simp1: How did I not notice

ToxicYuri2: of course she’d do that..

DeadYaoi: if 1 is dark enchantress then you’d be..?

ToxicYuri2: white lily, yes
I never thought I’d see you again
Well not see.. but you get the point, I assume

DeadYaoi: I do

Ticktock: elder faerie are you bi

DeadYaoi: why are you so invested in my love life

Ticktock: because we’re running out of quality gayness

Sheep: :(

Bald: :(

Sigma: :(

Ticktock: STFU

Bald: KYS

Sigma: KYS

Ticktock: NO
I keep the timelines running, I cannot afford to die :]

Simp1: everyone here is gay

ToxicYuri2: I’m pan..

DeadYaoi: me too

Simp1: ME TOO AND IT COUNTS SO STFU GET CALLED GAY

Niceguy: why do people’s sexualities matter to you if it doesn’t cause you to like them or dislike them?

Emo boy: for once, I agree with the genocidal dragon

Niceguy: that is not my whole personality

DeadYaoi: dragon?

Niceguy: have you not heard the tales?
Perhaps the one of the blue dragon, able to grant wishes. Perhaps of the red dragon, who had the hottest fire. Perhaps of the golden dragon, who controlled the earth. Perhaps of the violet dragon, who manipulated shadows.
And the greatest one of all, the ivory dragon, who knew all and saw all

Midget: WE GET THAT YOU’RE SMART STFU

Niceguy: I know you know, however he may not

Midget: NO SHIT

Niceguy: you are all lucky I am trapped down in the ocean

Sigma: HOW COME EARLIER MILLENNIAL TREE SAID YOU WERE LOOKING OVER HIS SHOULDER?

Niceguy: he visited

Simp1: LMAO

DeadYaoi: I was not aware the dragons were real, I assumed they were myth

Sheep: hollyberry is married to one :)

Alcoholic: Their name is Pitaya :)

Simp2: aka simp2 because timekeeper is interesting

DeadYaoi: congratulations, when did this happen?

Alcoholic: maybe half a year before we discovered the beasts existed? Not including when white lily learnt, that was a long time ago

ToxicYuri2: sometimes it seems like a shock when I think about a time a didn’t know..

DeadYaoi: I understand that, I used to feel like that when I’d remember times before I guarded the tree

Simp1: kys

ToxicYuri1: too late for that
you beat him to it

Simp1: It wasn’t even me! It was a little puppet of myself, I didn’t touch him!
Weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak

DoomedYaoi: elder faerie is many things, but weak is not one of them

DeadYaoi: you have my thanks, but you did not need to step in

DoomedYaoi: I was not doing it for you

Ticktock: do I need to rename him toxic yaoi now

Simp1: no that still seemed very gay, and it hinted at a romantic attraction in the past

DoomedYaoi: I do not need you speculating about my past
Cease

Simp1: no
You’re gay

Chapter Text

Ticktock added DeadYaoi to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

Simp1: KYS

Ticktock: he’s literally dead

Simp1: KYS FOR THE SECOND TIME

DeadYaoi left ✨✨The Gays✨✨

ToxicYuri2: poor elder faerie..

Ticktock added DeadYaoi to ✨✨The Gays✨✨

DeadYaoi: I do not wish to be here
Spending time with the beasts is worse than spending my afterlife alone

Simp1: skill issue

DoomedYaoi: Hello, Elder Faerie
Despite everything, I’m glad that you are here

DeadYaoi: you should not be
I failed my duty

DoomedYaoi: as did I, there is always time to try to fix the past

DeadYaoi: you say that you’ve fallen, yet it is as if nothing has changed

Ticktock: can we agree that this is gay

DeadYaoi: WHAT

Simp1: yes we can
It always was

DeadYaoi: I know there are good cookies on here, do not be fooled by their lies

DoomedYaoi: ignore them, everyone on here is stupid

Sheep: I agree with the ignore them part, but not everyone is stupid :)
Also hi Elder Faerie! It’s me, Pure Vanilla

DeadYaoi: so you have been placed in this witches forsaken group chat as well

Sheep: It’s not that bad :)

Pineapple: lies
Fire spirit and Pitaya got high on here

Backarcher: a reminder that it was sugar

DeadYaoi: who is backarcher

Backarcher: I am wind archer

DeadYaoi: I see the elemental guardians are here too

Sigma: BURNING HOT

Bald: STOP STEALING MY SONS DIALOGUE

Sigma: NO

Bald: KYS

Sigma: KYS

Sheep: Stop telling each other to kill themselves, you never know what someone’s going through :(

ToxicYuri2: I think it would be difficult to get those two to stop
I could be wrong though..

Sheep: you are probably right, but I want to try :)

ToxicYuri1: everyone here should die

Bald: ARENT WE ON THE SAME SIDE?

ToxicYuri1: oh yeah sorry :)

Simp1: she’s being nice something is off
MY FELLOW BEASTS I THINK DARK ENCHANTRESS MAY BETRAY US

DoomedYaoi: you only just realised?
She hungers for power, why would she keep us around if we’re more powerful than her?

Simp1: How did I not notice

ToxicYuri2: of course she’d do that..

DeadYaoi: if 1 is dark enchantress then you’d be..?

ToxicYuri2: white lily, yes
I never thought I’d see you again
Well not see.. but you get the point, I assume

DeadYaoi: I do

Ticktock: elder faerie are you bi

DeadYaoi: why are you so invested in my love life

Ticktock: because we’re running out of quality gayness

Sheep: :(

Bald: :(

Sigma: :(

Ticktock: STFU

Bald: KYS

Sigma: KYS

Ticktock: NO
I keep the timelines running, I cannot afford to die :]

Simp1: everyone here is gay

ToxicYuri2: I’m pan..

DeadYaoi: me too

Simp1: ME TOO AND IT COUNTS SO STFU GET CALLED GAY

Niceguy: why do people’s sexualities matter to you if it doesn’t cause you to like them or dislike them?

Emo boy: for once, I agree with the genocidal dragon

Niceguy: that is not my whole personality

DeadYaoi: dragon?

Niceguy: have you not heard the tales?
Perhaps the one of the blue dragon, able to grant wishes. Perhaps of the red dragon, who had the hottest fire. Perhaps of the golden dragon, who controlled the earth. Perhaps of the violet dragon, who manipulated shadows.
And the greatest one of all, the ivory dragon, who knew all and saw all

Midget: WE GET THAT YOU’RE SMART STFU

Niceguy: I know you know, however he may not

Midget: NO SHIT

Niceguy: you are all lucky I am trapped down in the ocean

Sigma: HOW COME EARLIER MILLENNIAL TREE SAID YOU WERE LOOKING OVER HIS SHOULDER?

Niceguy: he visited

Simp1: LMAO

DeadYaoi: I was not aware the dragons were real, I assumed they were myth

Sheep: hollyberry is married to one :)

Alcoholic: Their name is Pitaya :)

Simp2: aka simp2 because timekeeper is interesting

DeadYaoi: congratulations, when did this happen?

Alcoholic: maybe half a year before we discovered the beasts existed? Not including when white lily learnt, that was a long time ago

ToxicYuri2: sometimes it seems like a shock when I think about a time a didn’t know..

DeadYaoi: I understand that, I used to feel like that when I’d remember times before I guarded the tree

Simp1: kys

ToxicYuri1: too late for that
you beat him to it

Simp1: It wasn’t even me! It was a little puppet of myself, I didn’t touch him!
Weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak weak

DoomedYaoi: elder faerie is many things, but weak is not one of them

DeadYaoi: you have my thanks, but you did not need to step in

DoomedYaoi: I was not doing it for you

Ticktock: do I need to rename him toxic yaoi now

Simp1: no that still seemed very gay, and it hinted at a romantic attraction in the past

DoomedYaoi: I do not need you speculating about my past
Cease

Simp1: no
You’re gay

DoomedYaoi: so are you

Simp1: SO YOU CONFESS

Ticktock: THE DRAMA

EldritchHorror: THE ROMANCE

Midget: THE SEXUAL TENSION

Simp1: IM CACKLING

Ticktock: I’m watching him he is trying so hard not to get mad
I mean he is mad but he doesn’t want to let you win

DoomedYaoi: how are you watching me?

Ticktock: I VIEW the TIMELINES
Because I’m TIMEkeeper
I KEEP the TIMES

Niceguy: I am concerned

DoomedYaoi: as am I

Alcoholic: silent salt, you are the only sane beast and I need to inform you to not side with that dragon

Niceguy: so you undermine my attempts at interacting with cookies?

DoomedYaoi: You are the ivory dragon, correct?

Niceguy: yes

DoomedYaoi: I have heard of you. I may not agree with your actions however I cannot be one to judge

DeadYaoi: you are not evil

DoomedYaoi: I am. You saw what I did, I disregarded my virtue. I fell, and I am no better than the other beasts

DeadYaoi: your decisions were not right, however anyone could see how a noble cookie could be overtaken by anger after such a tragedy. Do not compare yourselves to the likes of the beasts

Lesbian: he’s literally a beast

Ticktock: guys he might seem calm on here but he just grabbed his sword WHERE IS HE GOING HE HASNT MOVED FOR DAYS

DoomedYaoi: that is none of your concern

Ticktock: did y’all know that he has targets with the masks that the budget versions of the beasts on it
He throws his sword at it since he doesn’t have any ranged weapons

DoomedYaoi: not all knowledge must be shared

Simp1: I have been summoned

DoomedYaoi: I cannot stay calm any longer
Cease your constant nagging before I destroy you and anything you may cherish

Bald: don’t kill pure vanilla

Simp1: KYS
I SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOU BOTH AFTER WE GOT OUT OF THE TREE, AS WELL AS THAT MEDDLING GNAT OF A FAERIE

DoomedYaoi: I WILL NOT LET YOU POISON THE WORLD WITH YOUR LIES ANY LONGER
I am coming, prepare yourself for death

Sheep: We should all bake biscuits :D

Simp1: KYS