Chapter 1: r/AmItheAsshole
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r/AmItheAsshole · Posted by u/LikeTheGemstone · 15h ago
AITA for asking my ex to officiate my wedding?
So my husband (27M) and I (27F) got married last month in a pretty rushed wedding, only a couple weeks after the proposal (don't ask why). Due to the quick time table and a really tight budget, we had our friends helping us out with everything. Our mutual friend agreed to be our wedding planner, my best friend that owns a diner did the catering and hosted the rehearsal dinner, and another friend/my husband's ex-boyfriend performed at the wedding. When it came to who should officiate, I decided to ask my friend, who is also my ex-girlfriend, to do it, since neither of us is really religious and she got ordained last year (long story).
Yesterday, I was showing our old friend that wasn't able to make the wedding a bunch of pictures and he couldn't believe I'd ask my ex to do that, but I thought it showed how important she is to me, asking her to be such an integral part of the wedding. So help me settle this: AITA?
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longdaysnight· 14h ago
I think it depends on a few things. How long ago did you break up and who did the breaking up? Do you consider her more a friend or an ex?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 14h ago
We broke up eight years ago and she's the one that ended it, but it was more due to outside forces beyond her control and I've always understood that. If I’m being completely honest, I guess we’re not really friends in the real sense of the word? I know I can trust her and go to her for anything, but it’s not like we text each other regularly and we don’t hang out much, just the two of us. It's almost always in our big friend group unless I need a favor. But I don't know what to call her if not my friend, because she's not just an ex to me, you know? She was my person for so long, even after the break up, and it's still hard to think of her as less than that.
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longdaysnight· 13h ago
Wow. Okay. Eight years is a pretty long time and I know lesbians move differently when it comes to friendships with their exes... I guess it's not that bad if everything really is cool between all three of you now and she didn't mind doing it
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ChasingLight· 12h ago
Info:
Was this like a legit ex-girlfriend or a fling? How long were you together?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 12h ago
I mean, she was my first love. We dated for two and a half years in high school (middle of sophomore year until the night of graduation) and we even lived together for 2 of those years. I thought she was who I was gonna marry when we were together. Which I know is what most high schoolers think, but we were different. We went through so much together and I couldn't imagine ending up with anyone else. So as legit as it gets.
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ChasingLight· 11h ago
Asking your first love and the girl you once thought you'd married to officiate your wedding is crazy work.
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ButchBottom97· 10h ago
YTA. If my ex asked me to officiate her wedding, I would stand up at that altar and kill myself in front of her to change the trajectory of her life
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 10h ago
Well damn. But this is lowkey something she'd threaten to do so it kinda made me smile. Funny story though, there actually were deaths at the wedding, but thankfully not hers.
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calling_home_98· 5m ago
is nobody else gonna comment on this? DEATHS??? plural??
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going_to_the_chappell· 8h ago
please tell me you were at least 100% sure she was over you when you asked, like she better be married with kids at least
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 8h ago
She’s dating another one of her exes right now, but it’s pretty new, like they got together just after I announced my engagement, so not even two months. I think it’s her first relationship since we broke up eight years ago, but it’s pretty obvious she was over me a long time ago. She asked me to pose for a portrait last year and we just sat in silence for twelve hours while she painted me and then she sent the portrait to me after like she didn’t want it. And then when I suggested we could try again after she found out the paternity of my baby, she said it just couldn't work, so.
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going_to_the_chappell· 7h ago
hold on. you were trying to get back with her just last year? while you were pregnant with someone else's baby?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 6h ago
It's not as insane as it sounds. I was having a baby with my two guy roommates, who were engaged to each other at the time. It was going to be a non-traditional family situation, that I wanted her to be part of. They ended up breaking up really shortly after we told all our friends about it, and I later got together with one of them after the other bailed on us, and that's who I ended up marrying, but I wasn't with him and I didn't want him when my ex rebuffed me, we were just friends and I was totally single.
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going_to_the_chappell· 4h ago
jesus christ, that poor girl.
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ohmygoddess· 4h ago
Asshole move for sure but reading some of your replies in here… have you considered the possibility that you're still in love with her?
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DepartedGhost· 4h ago
right? like did she want the ex to pull a speak now or what??
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 1h ago
What makes you think that lol?
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ohmygoddess· 15m ago
Every single thing you've said lmao
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No_Stranger· 3h ago
His ex sang and yours officiated? Bisexuals are so damn messy.
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whichwitch· 1h ago
Praying this doesn't reach lesbian Twitter, I just shuddered at the discourse it would cause because this is diabolical.
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 1m ago
I get it, you all think I'm an asshole, but I really think if I could give you guys more context without looking even more insane, more of you would be on my side idk.
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Chapter 2: r/writing
Notes:
I've been so pleasantly surprised by the reception to the first chapter considering how dead the tag is. It means a lot that there are still people willing to read Choni fics, or least read my silly little one, anyway. Back with another update. I think I said in the first chapter that these wouldn't necessarily be chronological and I still stand by that because it's too hard to settle on just one way to cover one topic and I'll want to jump around, but this one happens to be a pretty close follow up timeline wise.
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r/writing · Posted by u/LikeTheGemstone · 11h ago
Looking for feedback on character and plot progression
I’m not sure if this kind of post is usually made on this sub, but I’m looking for some help. With writing a plot. Because I’m a writer. I usually look for feedback in other subs, posting plot points as if they’re real dilemmas that I‘m seeking advice for (so if you've ever seen one of posts before, that's what that was about), but this one deals with the supernatural and other implausible things, so I can’t exactly post about it in r/relationships without looking crazy haha.
I won’t waste your time with all the elaborate backstory, but this story I’m writing is set in a modern small town that’s been under attack by a mysterious newcomer with great power. While he’s been defeated by this point in the story, he had one last trick up his sleeve that has left the town and its inhabitants trapped and at great risk. In an attempt to reverse this, one of the main characters (I’ll call her C), uses magic to contact a more powerful ancestor (I’ll call her A) to seek her knowledge. A offers to help, but only if C will let her inhabit her body for a time to reunite with long dead lover, who will need to use the body of C’s ex-girlfriend (T), because as it turns out, T is the descendant of A’s dead lover. T recently got married for the sake of her son, but agrees to the deal for the sake of the town.
I know this sounds crazy and convoluted but please do not comment on the insanity of the plot. It’s done and locked. I’m not looking for feedback on that or any decisions that have already been made. My question is this: do you think T has to tell her husband about it to remain a character worth rooting for? Or is it okay that she keeps it to herself since it was for a good cause and it wasn't technically cheating?
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gimmemoar94· 10h ago
girl i promise nobody is gonna give a fuck about that damn husband
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 10h ago
Would you feel this way if he was a real person?
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gimmemoar94· 9h ago
lmao i'd care even less if he was real tbh
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ColourNotColor· 10h ago
I think it depends on what you want T’s relationship with the husband to be after they break up. Do you want it to be amicable so he's out of the way or are you willing to deal with the messy fall out, especially with a kid involved? How close to the end of the book is the break up going to be?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 10h ago
Why do you assume they're going to break up?
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ColourNotColor· 7h ago
Because I have basic media literacy?
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Bon_Bonnie· 7h ago
I don’t have any writing advice but please come back and share when the book gets published because I love stories about sapphic soulmates and there are not enough of them out there!
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 6h ago
That's not what the story is about...
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Bon_Bonnie· 4h ago
Two ex-girlfriends finding out their dead ancestors were in love x amount of years ago and letting them use their bodies to reunite even though one is in a loveless marriage? I know a reincarnated soulmates trope when I see one.
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 4h ago
Soulmates aren't real.
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Bon_Bonnie· 3h ago
Well this is a fictional story where things like body swapping is possible, no?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 10m ago
Right, of course, obviously lol
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keepit_cool· 6h ago
What kind of character is the husband? Main or tertiary? An asshole or a good guy?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 4h ago
I'm not sure about that first question, but as for the second one... it depends on the day. I might have considered him a good guy earlier in the story but recent developments suggest otherwise.
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keepit_cool· 2h ago
Meh, fuck him then, I say.
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UndertheHill· 3h ago
does she remember the sex they had at all?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 3h ago
She tells C she doesn't but yes. She remembers it.
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UndertheHill· 2h ago
was it better than the sex with the husband?
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 1h ago
I don't see how that's relevant to my question. But also yes.
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alltea_allshade· 6h ago
It wasn't technically cheating to who?? Sounds like cheating to me.
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gimmemoar94· 2h ago
and good for her!
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LikeTheGemstone OP· 1h ago
How can it be cheating if T and C's souls weren't in their bodies? Their bodies had sex, yes, but their souls were in a jar the whole time. Not having sex.
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alltea_allshade· 45m ago
You wouldn't have even made this post if you didn't know it was cheating at least a little bit.
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FutchShauna96· 1h ago
I think she should tell him, but not to be more rootable (I for one always root for women to cheat on their husbands with other women) but to make him more miserable.
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Chapter 3: u/FangsForTheMemories
Notes:
Did something a little different with this chapter. Let's check in and see what Fangs gets up to on Reddit and see what we can gleam about where his head is at based on that activity.
Since this is a Reddit profile showing recent comments/posts, it would probably make sense to read this from the bottom up if you want to follow things chronologically but there's not a huge amount of ~story being told so it's not necessary. There's a few pop culture references that might not line up timeline wise but it's not like these have dates or like Riverdale cared about that kind of shit so just go with it and laugh.
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r/AskReddit · Have you ever been cheated on?
FangsForTheMemories replied to bigdawg_98 1 day ago
i'm bisexual...
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r/AskReddit · Have you ever been cheated on?
FangsForTheMemories commented 1 day ago
maybe. me and my ex were in an open relationship for a few years of our 7 year relationship but i bet he was with other guys when we were supposed to be closed. and i don't have any proof but i've been getting huge vibes that my wife is hooking with her bitch ex or at least wants to
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r/buffy · What are your most unpopular Buffy opinions?
FangsForTheMemories commented 4 day ago
xander is overhated
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r/polls · How many times a week do you wash your hair?
FangsForTheMemories commented 6 days ago
who the fuck is washing their hair more than once a week lmfao
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r/AmIOverreacting · 8 days ago
AIO for being upset my wife spent the night with her ex?
My wife and I have been fighting nonstop for like a month but last night was another level. She told me she was going to a girls sleepover at her ex gf's house, which I already didn't like when I assumed the other girls in our friend group were going to be there but I found out the next morning that it was just the 2 of them and it wasn't even because she told me but because I ran into 1 of the other girls and she had no idea about it. My wife says I'm overreacting because I should trust her and that she didn't lie because she didn't say anyone else was gonna be there. I might have bought that if this was a 1 time thing but she's been spending so much time with her ex suddenly and she knows it pisses me off and also who has a sleepover with their ex while married?? AIO for being upset?
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r/TrueOffMyChest · My husband has been unemployed for almost a year
FangsForTheMemories commented 9 days ago
men can contribute meaningfully to the family more than just financially yk. give him a break, he probs feels shitty enough without you on his nuts
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r/Firearms · Where Do You Keep Your Guns?
FangsForTheMemories commented 13 days ago
used to have the best place for mine until my wife made me get rid of them
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r/Parenting · Tips for dealing with a colicy baby
FangsForTheMemories replied to annie_blue 17 days ago
my mom did it with me and i turned out fine
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r/Parenting · Tips for dealing with a colicy baby
FangsForTheMemories commented 17 days ago
leave it out on a tree stump in the forest overnight and it'll cry it right out
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r/television · Who's the best male TV protagonist?
FangsForTheMemories commented 21 days ago
walter white's the goat
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r/FauxMoi · What Are Your Pop Culture Red Flags?
FangsForTheMemories replied to futurefemme 25 days ago
what's wrong with loving fight club?
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r/AskMen · Dear men, what do you think about women proposing to men?
FangsForTheMemories replied to annie_blue 1 mo. ago
how tf does that make him a cuck? thats not even what that word means bro
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r/bisexual · 1mo. ago
Are you different in your relationships with men and women?
My wife and I (M) are both bisexual and been friends for years so we've seen each other with different partners. We each had 1 other long term relationship, her with her high school gf and me with the guy I dated during/after college. I don't think I act any different with her than with him but she acts way different with me vs her ex. She never calls me petnames like she did with her and they were always all over each other but we like never do pda or even private displays (at least not if I don't start it). IDK if it's just how she is with girls vs guys or if there's something deeper there...
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r/TrueUnpopularOpinion · Some kinks should be shamed and discouraged
FangsForTheMemories replied to dodgingdoger 1 mo. ago
trust me some people really do have tickling fetishes, probs more than you think
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r/wickedmovie · I think Ariana is going to surprise everyone
FangsForTheMemories commented 1 mo. ago
nah she's gonna be awful. this was supposed to be a serious adaptation, not some nickelodeon trash
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r/relationship_advice · My ex-husband wants to introduce our daughter to his new...
FangsForTheMemories replied to FlameThrowing94 1 mo. ago
same, i would be fucking sick if some rando tried to be a parent to my son, even more than getting with my girl
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r/AmItheAsshole · AITA for punching my girlfriend's friend when he...
FangsForTheMemories commented 2 mo. ago
you're not the asshole, a lot of times violence IS the answer tbh
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r/witcher · Henry Cavill will leave The Witcher Netflix after Season 3...
FangsForTheMemories commented 2 mo. ago
only good thing about the show going... yeah just cancel this shit
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r/Proposal · 2mo. ago
Right/wrong reasons to propose
My gf proposed to me kind of out of nowhere and it all just felt weird to me. When I told her I wanted to make sure I got married for the right reasons (because I already had an engagement fail) she started talking about giving our son stability and a family and I don't know how to feel about that because like that's not romantic at all. But I got engaged for love last time and it flopped so maybe doing it for practical reasons is better. What would you do?
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