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Jae Heydari was having a wonderful, if unproductive, day. The reason for that first part was obvious—almost all of her days had been wonderful since she had found herself in the company of the newly minted Rogue Trader, Pandora. She was too perfectly cooperative a soul for things to be otherwise. Right now, though, that unmitigated luck just highlighted the unhelpful boulder of a man Jae had put herself in the path of: Heinrix van Calox, the reason her day was currently not going as swimmingly as it should.
She’d spent the last few minutes trying to butter him up despite his endless icily polite responses. It really was like talking to the void with this one. Jae knew she could handle it though. Just like the void, the Interrogator contained treasures if one was tenacious enough in their search. Or, well, she guessed he did—what better source of xenotech could there be than a member of his Ordo? And if she couldn’t manage that, she could always give him the information of particularly thorny competitors. The possibilities were all there, ripe for the taking, if only… Well, if only he stopped being such an ashmag.
Still, she persevered despite the man’s… everything. He was only disinterested because she had yet to find the right angle; this she was sure of. But she would! And then, oh the thrones she could make!
“So, when are we going to finally get together for a proper conversation, do you think? I am sure there is so much we can learn from each other.”
“As I have said, my attention would be less than fruitful for your endeavors, Mistress Heydari. You would find my company far from enjoyable, I assure you.”
“Oh? That is incredibly hard to believe. Why would the Rogue Trader invite you to her chambers so often if your company wasn’t stimulating?” Jae asked innocently, swallowing a smirk so she could give him a charming smile instead.
The Interrogator’s face was always stony, but his everpresent frown carved itself deeper into his face. “To play regicide.”
Jae was so caught off guard she spoke without thinking. “...Wait, that isn’t a euphemism?”
The look the man gave her was so disdainful that Jae knew he had to be telling the truth, and suddenly several things she had thought were solid facts disappeared as quickly as alms tossed on the streets of Footfall. She wasn’t sure if she should pity the Interrogator or curse him. Imagine squandering all that private time by playing a board game of all things! What a waste!
Jae was always quick on her feet, however, and as the dust settled on what she’d thought she knew, myriad new roads quickly revealed themselves to her. Folding her hands together in faux delight, she said, “Oh, what good news! Do you know, Master van Calox, I am quite a fan of regicide, too! I’m sure you are a marvelous opponent, and I’d jump at the chance to discover that firsthand. What do you say? Would you like to play a game together?”
For the briefest of moments, Jae was certain she saw genuine interest flicker across the Interrogator’s face. It’s actually working! she thought, but perhaps her triumph showed on her expression, as the Interrogator just shook his head.
“For some reason, I don’t think we would end up playing regicide if I agreed to this,” he said dryly, and though the words were meant to be sardonic, Jae quickly realized how she could turn them to her advantage.
Letting out a gasp, she held a hand to her chest and said, “Master van Calox! What are you insinuating? Did you think I was propositioning you for a tryst of some kind?”
The Interrogator’s eyes widened, and he all but choked in surprise. “Tryst? What are you— No. That was not what I was— No.”
How quickly his stony exterior could begin to crumble! Had she known he was this easy to set off balance, she would have tried it long ago. Jae leaned forward—making sure to arch her back as she did—and looked up at the Interrogator. “What a pity. Are you sure?”
The Interrogator backstepped, but his voice was both firm and unimpressed. “Quite. My disinterest can only be matched by your own, I'm sure, regardless of if you are willing to admit it or not.” Unfortunately, it seemed whatever fluster she’d inspired had not lasted.
By the Exalted One! If only he wasn’t so suspicious… and perceptive. The paths that had revealed themselves to Jae so recently had begun to narrow. Still, she would find a way forward. She always did. And as she resolved herself to this, a distant, blue robed figure caught her attention, walking in their general direction. With the Interrogator’s gaze on Jae, he likely wouldn’t notice… Yes, that’s it! If she showed herself an ally in some matters, surely even he would be able to see how well they could work together in others.
“I have no idea what you mean,” she told him, feigning hurt. “But if I somehow disinterest you, Interrogator, it makes me curious who could possibly catch your ever so discerning eye.”
The Interrogator didn't bother looking apologetic. “You are curious about a great many things, Mistress Heydari. None of which I wish to entertain with an answer.”
“Oh, come now, I’m not asking for an Inquisitorial secret, now am I? What’s the harm in telling me?” she asked, somehow keeping her words playful instead of impatient.
“As it happens, I don’t need to give you a reason.”
If only he was as cooperative as the Rogue Trader! Really, even trying to help him is a huge pain in the ass! Jae pursed her lips, but they quickly curved into a smile as she found another path forward. “Hmm, well then, what if I gave you one to change your mind?”
One of his eyebrows arched up by the slimmest margin, but he said nothing in response. Importantly, however, he hadn’t said ‘no,’ so Jae barrelled onward. “For some reason that escapes me, you don’t seem to want to work together for mutual benefit. I’ve no interest in going where I’m not wanted, so if you’ll entertain me—just for a moment, of course—I’ll be happy to cease my attempts.” She wouldn’t need to go to him if he came to her, after all.
He narrowed his eyes. “Why?”
“I simply want to get to know you better, Master van Calox. I don’t know why that’s so hard to believe,” Jae lied.
The Interrogator just kept staring at her, and it was all Jae could do not to tap her foot or look past him at the figure, who had made quite a bit of progress toward them. If he didn’t make up his mind soon, she (and he!) would lose their chance. Ugh, perhaps she needed to be a touch more truthful to seal the deal.
“I guess I’m also just morbidly curious. I’m used to many things, but disinterest isn’t one of them,” she admitted before finishing with another lie. “I suppose I just want the chance to understand why.”
The Interrogator scoffed, but it seemed more unimpressed than disbelieving. And Jae’s estimation was proven quite right a moment later. “Very well. But keep your word. I tire of you testing my patience.” Then, he told her in an utterly bored tone, “A long time ago, I once had a fleeting romance with a baroness on Narvellon 19 in the Calixus Sector. Raven hair, olive skin, and a fiery temperament. I suppose that’s the combination I like. I pray that has given you your answer. Now stop bothering me.”
Her plan had immediately crashed to the ground in smoldering ruins, but Jae was so amused she didn’t care at all. In fact, she could barely contain herself. “Shereen, did you hear that? Hasn’t our esteemed Interrogator just described me perfectly?”
Heinrix went completely still, his gaze unfocusing, and Jae’s grin widened so far her cheeks began to ache.
The Rogue Trader, meanwhile, turned and walked up to them, a polite expression visible on the half of her face not shrouded by the hood of her blue psyker robes.
Jae had always found it interesting how persistently the woman wore it up, but she couldn’t deny that by hiding her face, the Rogue Trader lent it a certain allure. And what a face it was! Her features an enticing mix of hard and soft. Full lips set into a strong and rounded jaw. Hooded, downturned eyes contrasted and complemented by arched brows. High cheekbones that were just prominent enough to be noticed without detracting from the softness of her face.
Oh yes, she was beautiful in an invitingly warm way, even with the eyes that were an uncannily bright green and the scar that cut across the left side of her face, bisecting her eyebrow and continuing down to partially mar one cheek. Really, they were just two more points of contrast to draw one’s attention. But Jae thought there were two other aspects of the Rogue Trader’s appearance that were more important, just then. That being the color of her skin, pale with a warm undertone, and the color of her hair, light blonde, a few curly locks of which peaked out from under her hood.
The Rogue Trader came to a stop and said in that gentle, composed way of hers, “Oh, no, I think I’d have to disagree. I don’t think your temper is fiery at all. You’re far too kind.”
“Alas, I believe you may be right!” Jae cried, her smile not faltering in the slightest.
For his part, Heinrix let out a sigh, then said with fastidious politeness to the Rogue Trader, “You are indeed. I was simply… making a joke.” Jae had never heard such words said with less amusement. Oh! How delightful!
“I see… Has anyone ever told you that you have an odd sense of humor?” the Rogue Trader asked. The question was clearly genuine, the small grin on her face sincere. Jae watched as it managed to soften even the Interrogator’s hard expression, the corners of his mouth twitching ever so slightly upwards.
“It has never come up, no,” he said.
The Rogue Trader nodded and seemed about to say something more, but Jae spoke up first, an amazing idea having come to her. “What about you, shereen? Might you give us some insight into our dear Lord Captain’s tastes?”
Two gazes turned to her. One sharp, the other surprised.
“Oh, uhm…” The Rogue Trader hesitated.
“Come now! We are your retinue, your comrades! What better way to grow closer than to learn about one another, hmm?” Jae cajoled.
“I am not really sure how this will help, but sure, why not?” the Rogue Trader said with quiet amusement. Then, she held a hand to her chin, her eyes flicking away in thought as she seemed to consider the question. After a short time, she looked back at Jae and said, “I guess women, mostly?”
In that moment, the Rogue Trader’s voice was as beautiful as that of Sister Argenta’s, and Jae gave thanks to the Exalted One for the privilege to hear it.
“Is that so?” she asked, just barely able to contain her glee.
The Rogue Trader nodded before seeming to grow thoughtful again. Jae seized the chance to look over at the Interrogator. He was staring straight ahead, unblinking, his face completely expressionless. He did not even seem to notice her gaze. Jae swallowed another laugh.
“I mean, I like men, too. It's just that… Well, I was in the Astra Militarum for most of my life, and the guardsmen tended to be…” The Rogue Trader leaned forward, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “Kind of bad in bed? In general, anyway. Much worse hygiene, too. So they just weren’t very appealing.”
Jae couldn’t help but agree, given her own experience. Still, it was strange to imagine someone as noble as a Rogue Trader knowingly sleeping with anyone in the Imperial Guard at all. Though there was one (former) guardswoman that it was very fun to imagine her with, indeed. Such a pity they hadn’t crossed paths until recently.
“If you say it is so, then so it must be, shereen!” Jae told her cheerfully, and, seeing the beautiful path the Rogue Trader had revealed, she asked, “Oh, but, is there nothing about a person that might draw your illustrious eye in the first place? Raven hair and olive skin, perhaps?” Jae threw back her head, sending the dark curls of her hair cascading down her back to accentuate the question.
The Rogue Trader lifted a hand to cover her mouth, a laugh bubbling up beneath her fingers. Somehow, she appeared to think Jae was genuinely joking. “You’re gorgeous of course, but I never really cared about specifics like that. Except, well, I guess I’ve always liked people who are well-built. It’s hard not to admire the effort involved.”
The (deeply unfortunate) words had been said to Jae more than anyone, but she saw the Interrogator shift upon hearing them. She couldn’t help inspecting him surreptitiously, and she was quite positive that he had stood slightly straighter. Not that it mattered, given he already towered over the both of them. Not for the first time she noticed the broadness of his shoulders. Never before had it been irritating.
Heinrix caught her glance and seemed to repress a snort, turning his attention fully back to the Rogue Trader. Who, in turn, was looking at both of them with a tinge of confusion.
“Is it that strange?” she asked. “I thought my taste was pretty normal.”
Jae at once decided to return to her earlier path. “Oh no, not at all, shereen! I had simply noticed that—”
“Mistress Heydari is correct, Pandora. There is nothing strange about your taste. When I was in the Astra Militarum, I also found the guardsmen intensely unappealing,” Heinrix interrupted, spoiling her fun.
However, Jae quickly realized that he’d also left an opening. Hah! Amateur. “No doubt you had better luck with the guardswomen, though, hmm?”
Jae watched with glee as the Interrogator’s frown noticeably deepened. “Not at all, actually,” he said, giving her a flat look.
“Really?” said the Rogue Trader, her eyebrows raised. “You’re handsome and tall. I’m surprised that wasn’t enough.”
The words were spoken like fact instead of flirtation, but they made Jae grin maniacally. Her eyes were glued to Heinrix. However, she was deeply upset when she spotted not a single hint of a blush. Oh, how boring! she thought, but perhaps she had been too quick to do so, as Heinrix suddenly lifted his hand and coughed, able to hide from the Rogue Trader (but not Jae) a slight, embarrassed smile. Ugh, no wonder he’s made no progress!
“I believe being a psyker played a large part,” he told the Rogue Trader, having composed himself once more.
A shadow passed over the Rogue Trader’s face, and she dipped her head in what was probably more apology than agreement. “...That makes sense. You don’t have implants, so I thought you’d be able to hide it, at least somewhat.”
Jae watched with interest as Heinrix briefly hesitated, his gaze flicking to the floor before returning to the Rogue Trader as he replied in a low voice, “I had them at the time.”
“Oh… I had no idea that they could be removed,” she said.
“You can, but it’s not a simple undertaking. Much care has to be taken to avoid causing unnecessary damage.”
“I see, well… I think I’ll keep it in mind, still. Maybe just adjusting them would be easier. I’ve forgotten what it’s like not to have a crick in my neck,” the Rogue Trader said, reaching up to run a hand over the everpresent thick, metal collar that hung around her neck and shoulders, the classic hallmark of a psyker. It was blocky and charmless as any Jae had seen, but she was unsurprised it hadn’t erased the Rogue Trader’s appeal. She was equally unsurprised it had done so for the Interrogator. One as relaxing as fine amasec, the other a looming boulder threatening imminent violence. What more was there to say, really? Well, except that.
“I suppose, then, you’ve fared better since? Or has your luck still run dry? Too… intimidating, perhaps?” she asked, and the look Heinrix shot her was a balm to the soul. She waited with anticipation to see how he might try to blunder his way out of this.
Tragically, before he had a chance to do so, the Rogue Trader spoke instead. “But isn’t that his charm? Intimidating at first glance, while actually being polite and well spoken?”
Just like before, the Rogue Trader’s tone was mild. There were no coy smiles or flirtatious looks. If anything, she just seemed slightly confused—as if it was something obvious that shouldn’t have needed to be said.
In the corner of her vision, Jae saw Heinrix straighten once again, and it was all she could do not to roll her eyes. Then, hiding her annoyance behind a large smile, she said brightly, “Ahh, right you are, shereen. Surely then, our dear Interrogator must have—”
The crackling of a vox interrupted her, the one hanging from the Rogue Trader’s hip having just sprung to life. She lifted it and accepted the transmission. The Vox Master’s voice came through, requesting her presence elsewhere on the bridge.
“Of course, Vigdis! I’ll be right there. I’m sorry; I got distracted,” the Rogue Trader replied, clicking off the vox before she looked over at the two of them. “I apologize. Duty calls—literally, this time. It was nice talking to you as always.”
Two apologies in as many sentences, what strange things to hear from a noble. Especially to those beneath them. If Jae didn’t know better, she could almost think the Rogue Trader was a normal person.
“Of course, shereen. Thank you for blessing us with your time and input. I hope you do so again soon!" Jae told her.
The Rogue Trade just smiled in response, glancing over at Heinrix, who quickly bowed his head. “There are no apologies necessary. Until later, Pandora.”
She inclined her head a fraction, still smiling, before turning on her heel and continuing down the bridge with purposeful steps, sparing neither of them another glance.
Jae, however, was more than happy to make up the difference, a much more genuine grin splitting across her face as she watched Heinrix track the Rogue Trader with an intensity so obvious she was positive he didn’t realize he was doing it at all.
Sidling closer, she pretended to elbow him and said, “You’re welcome! Don’t worry about saying your thanks aloud. I have already received them in my heart.”
“Is that so? Is it common to thank people for mockery on your homeworld?” he asked, his words dry and face expressionless as he swiftly turned back into the block of stone Jae was so used to.
“Mockery? You wound me! And after I went to such lengths to help you. It brings a tear to my eye.” Jae rubbed at her dry cheek forlornly.
The Interrogator simply looked at her, his eyes narrow and a tick at the corner of his mouth, and it was all she could do not to laugh in his face.
Jae pressed a hand to her chest, looking up at him through raven lashes. “I was trying to help you, you know. Never would I have wagered that your description would go so awry.”
“Either way, it would have been a mess of your making,” he replied with a derisive snort.
“I think you meant to say a golden opportunity—or is that a turn of phrase we only have on Efreet? I can wish you luck with your stolen glances and hidden smiles if that is what you want. I simply think it will have little effect on someone like our enchanting Lord Captain. She’s strange—clever as can be, yet denser than adamantine. At least in some respects.”
“Have you considered that it’s simply not difficult to ignore your painfully insincere flattery?” he asked with scorn.
Jae let out a quite genuine-sounding fake gasp. “Ah! Again you wound me, and after all I have done for you. I suppose rather than an ally, you would like an enemy, then? Happily! As it happens, my tastes run rather rich and golden.”
“I thought they were more pious and deadly,” he replied so dryly that it took Jae a moment to realize he’d made any joke at all.
When she did, it startled a rough bark of laughter out of her, which she quickly turned into something more refined. “I contain multitudes, Interrogator. It is one of my many charms. Of which the Lord Captain has no doubt noticed as well. Who amongst us has the better chance, do you think? A woman…” She grinned, hovering on the word longer than needed before continuing, “...who is not perfectly her taste, or a man who is slightly closer?”
Jae had hedged gleefully, waiting for defensiveness and annoyance. Oh, how fun it would be to hear him try to argue, failing to string the words together when he realized what he was about to say! Alas, she had forgotten what he truly was.
The frustration disappeared from the Interrogator’s face, replaced by cold indifference. He was simply staring at her, his expression flat and detached. Then, he leaned forward—not much, but enough to remind her how very good he was at looming—and said, “I think… that you should stop bothering me with your antics, lest you run through what little remains of my patience and I decide that your operations are worthy of investigation after all.”
He lacked any trace of good humor to the point it had become a vacuum, sucking away hers as well. As big a spoilsport as he is a stiffnecked ass!
Jae’s smile didn’t falter; it just gained an edge. She leaned forward onto the balls of her feet, closing the distance in turn as she said, honey sweet, “Threats, Interrogator? Between those who should be comrades in arms? Oh my, I think that is just terribly… impolite. I hope the Lord Captain doesn’t hear about this.”
His icy mask cracked for a moment, but Jae had no clue what emotion rippled briefly across his face. The issue with trying to read a man in a perpetual state of bad temper was that it was hard to judge what his different shades of anger actually meant. Whatever it was, however, it led him to let out a passionless sigh and roll his eyes.
Straightening, he said, “This is a waste of our time. And mine happens to actually be valuable. Good day, Mistress Heydari. Remember to keep your word, and may our next meeting be long in coming.”
He didn’t wait for her reply before walking away, so Jae simply called brightly after him, “Until later, Master van Calox! The same pleasure as always.”
The smile remained on her face even after he’d gone, becoming only more relaxed with his absence. He was just so odd! An Inquisitor who actually cared enough about another person to be bothered that he might not be able to hold her attention. How banal, how human—It didn’t suit him at all. At least enforcers wanted power, at least pirates wanted money. But him? He brutalized people because it was his duty, not even seeming to take joy from it. If he did, Jae might have been able to make some sense of him. Instead, he was just a hardened block of violence in the vague shape of a person, more weapon than human.
Maybe that was why it was so funny to see him trying to be one even for a moment? Watching as he stumbled and faltered, his movements as awkward and graceless as a servitor’s. Maybe some part of her had never left the mines, and she wanted to see what blood could be gotten from a stone. Not by her, of course, she’d never be stupid enough to try. But the Rogue Trader was another matter, whether she knew it yet or not. (And Jae was leaning towards ‘not,’ whatever the Interrogator seemed to think.) Still, if anyone had a chance, Jae was certain it was the Lord Captain.
It was too amusing to ignore, Jae decided. She could watch, maybe even meddle. What was the harm in that? She nodded to herself, the Interrogator’s threat already fading from her memory as she began walking back to her chambers to celebrate an unexpectedly productive day.