Chapter Text
Seth came back home after a shitty day of work. Again, he had to do overtime because some guy asked him to help on some code stuff. Anyway, that's in the past now, and he could concentrate on taking care of Hirano, the sick boy.
As Seth entered his room quietly, he found Hira asleep, pen in hand and a notebook on his lap. Curious, Seth grabbed the journal and hesitated before reading it.
" Date : 08/06/2065 "
His handwriting was neat, unlike Seth's, and easy to read.
" Dear journal.
I’m sick. Again. It's about the 10th time this year. I hate it when everyone cares about me. It's not that I don't like people, it's that I hate being taken care of. I hate it when people care about me, I'm the one supposed to care. I'm the one supposed to be strong. But I'm sick, and everyone gives me soup to make me feel better. Bulalo. Ramen. God, I don't need it, I can overcome it on my own. Even my dearest, my one and only love, Seth cares too much. I told him to stop, but he just can't, he says. He says that he can't just let me rot away like that.
But honestly, I can't deny, the soups are making me feel warm. Is it because it's for me? Is it because it makes me feel better? I don't know, I don't want to know. Though, I miss the salads Seth used to make for me, for lunch. That's the best he could do, and tasted good. I miss them, I miss the days I'm not sick. I just want him to be happy and not care too much about me. I love him, but does he think I'm too much to handle? Am I too much of a mess for him to love? Does he even love me? I don't know. I wish I could ask him but I'm scared to ruin the friendship we have.
Am I overthinking it? Probably. Yes, probably. I wish they could just leave me alone when I'm sick, I wish they understood I hate it when they care. But they keep going. And, I know I shouldn't think that, but I am thankful for them to stay even though I push them away. I can't just accept it, the fact I'm being taken care of, the free food… I hate it but I crave it at the same time.
I don't want them to leave actually. "
Seth looked at Hira's asleep features, reading the last sentence again.
" I don't want them to leave, actually. "
He could see the dot at the end being a bit smudged. That was probably the moment he fell asleep.
Speaking of being asleep, Seth should probably go to bed. Probably the first time in the year he'd sleep at a decent hour. So he softly took Hira's pen away, putting it alongside the notebook on the desk. Then softly laying him down in a more comfortable position before leaving, going to sleep himself.