Chapter Text
Okay….
Mom’s dead.
I can do this. I’ve been fending for myself for six months, mom was happy to have me out of the apartment so long as no one saw me.
She had to care for me if she wanted me back every day….right?
She had to love me if i couldn’t be seen and come back home….right?
Right?
The building burned as green flames refused to calm down.
The firefighters battled the emerald inferno as those who were heading home found it in ashes and those who escaped wept as they each gave statements as to what happened.
I snagged a green blanket from a trash can and climbed up to the rooftops.
Hiding where I had my feast, I wrapped myself up tight.
I looked at myself in a puddle nearby for any semblance of her.
Dark red skin, sure.
I touched my face, noting my black fingertips.
My horns slicked back at a sharp angle like hers…but mine were black and white with thin white lines in the bands.
A mix of male and female horn patterns.
She always called them weird.
Wondering why I came out with them like that.
My hair, a massive mane of black, wiry hair mixed with soft black feathers mixed in.
My eyes were a bright green, with white, glowing pupils.
Mom always called them creepy. Telling me to either squint or keep my eyes closed whenever she was around.
But the thing she hated most was my beak.
A large, crooked beak that faded to a near black to the tip.
It nearly got me caught when sneaking around the Lust Ring, stealing food and other things we needed.
I remember when I first snuck out and brought home a leather jacket that was left on a bench.
She was so angry at me for daring to leave the apartment, but when she saw the jacket. She got really excited.
I remember what she said,”Looks like you’re useful after all.”
And she smiled at me.
I took so many things to make her happy.
I’m just 12, what else was I supposed to do?
She liked me when I brought home good stuff for her, and guests to the Lust Ring usually had good stuff…..
I shook my head to snap back to the moment.
I had to think.
Where do I go from here?
I’ve never been much further than Ozzie’s back doors, but I’ve seen the Elevators in the distance….maybe….
No….
Those golden places aren’t meant for demons like me….
There’s no where to hide there!
Wait….why do have to hide? Mom never explained why.
I just did what she told me to.
“Maybe….I could…” I mumbled, looking down at the street below.
I touched my beak.
What would they think?
My feathers….mixed with the coarse hair of an imp….
And the fan on the end of my tail…
I grab my tail and guide it to wrap around my thin waist like a heavy belt.
I fix up the dirty blanket to hide my hair and feathers, like a cloak from the magazine mom had last year.
Granted, it was making fun of cloaks, but it’s the best thing I can do right now.
But how do I hide my beak?
How do I hide my feet?
Bent, black legs like a bird.
Nothing like hers.
No hooves for me.
I pace, trying to think of something, and in frustration, I kick the trash from my feast over the roof and I hear it hit someone.
“HEY!” I hear an angry voice call up.
I don’t even wait.
I don’t even respond.
I ran.
I didn’t even have a direction. I just needed to run.
But there was something……exciting about it.
I laughed.
I laughed for the first time in my life.
A terrible, squawking croak of a laugh.
But it was mine.
~~~~~~~~~
I lived my life stealing and running for a while after that.
Often breaking into the library after hours to learn as much as I could about Hell and the places that I could go to.
I learned how there used to be caves and tunnels that demons used to use more commonly before the Elevators were built.
There’s also passages specifically for trucks and choppers to make deliveries between the Rings.
I wish I could have someone help me get somewhere else….
I don’t dare to meet other demons.
I won’t let them see me.
What would they do if they did?
What would I say?
How do you talk to other people without feeling like you’re gonna be sick?
It was another night of hiding in the Library, the security guard had fallen asleep at his post as usual.
So silent as always, I treaded quietly through the shelves.
I was 15 at this point and I had read just about everything in this place at least twice.
But there was one that always evaded my attention.
“There you are.” I whispered to myself.
The Notable Works of the Ars Goetia.
I opened the book and froze.
They look like me….
Beaks and feathers…like mine….
And the way they live in comfort…they don’t need to worry about anything.
I read more.
The wealth.
Powers and destinies.
Families.
They all know where they come from.
“That’s not fair.” I whispered.
I feel my heart aching.
Maybe I could go to them.
Make my case.
Maybe they’ll bring me in, tell me that they were waiting for me, that I was meant to be something more than a starving thief!
I fell to my knees and read about their powers and how important they were.
Am I supposed to have powers?
Who was my dad?
Surely, he knew I existed.
Which one of them was my dad?
I didn’t even realize I was sobbing until a voice boomed and a flashlight shone in my face.
THE GUARD!
SHIT!
I froze in place, tears running down my face and the thought occurred to me.
This is the first time I’ve ever had another demon see me.
Mom always made me hide in the closet when she brought her partners to the apartment and told me to stay there until they left…..no matter how long they were there.
No matter how much I wanted to get out.
No matter how scared or hungry or whatever…
I didn’t even realize that I was shaking until the old hellhound put a paw on my shoulder.
“How did you get in here, Kid? You hungry?” He asked.
My stomach answered for me, I hadn’t been able to get anything good for a couple days.
“C’mon, you can take my lunch at my desk.” He helped me up to my feet, but I didn’t move.
I just stare at him, still crying and shaking.
“What’s the matter, Kid? Too good for a Hellhound’s food?” He asked, sounding annoyed.
I shake my head,”Y-You’re not….afraid?”
He raised an eyebrow,”Of a scrawny thing like you? You’re a bit funny lookin’ but I ain’t scared.” He laughed,”Nah, I’m gonna feed ya and get you to your momma.”
I look down at the floor,”Oh…that’s gonna be difficult.”
“Why?”
“She died 3 years ago in that apartment fire. The only reason I lived was because I snuck out and fell asleep on the roof of some shop a few blocks from Ozzie’s.”
The old Hellhound’s expression softened,”You got an old man? Another mom? Maybe some cousins?”
“I don’t know who my dad is… I don’t have anybody.” I just kept talking,”Mom told me that no one was supposed to see me, never told me why, and I just…..hid…” I held my shoulders, trying to shop the shaking,”She always said I was scary and creepy, and she never let anyone know I even existed.”
And I wept.
The Hellhound helped me to the desk and sat me down on his chair,”Kid, I hate to disrespect her. I think she just hated you.” He said before handing me a water bottle,”Listen, I’m gonna call my husband and ask him to get the couch ready. You’re welcome to come with me and get cleaned up.” He takes off his cap and rubs the back of his neck,”It wouldn’t be right to let a kid be left on….his? own?”
I wasn’t even sure how to answer that.
“You got a name, or do I just call you Kid?” He smiled,”I’m Piles.”
“….Ephai… My name is Ephai.”