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Swiftpaw was vibrating with rage and jealousy that night, the night that Cloudtail was given his warrior name. Longtail himself could barely look at the fluffy white cat without anger gripping onto his bones like a snake to its prey.

Swiftpaw had been named an apprentice before Cloudtail was even born. Hell, maybe even before he was even conceived. He was 20 moons old, and should’ve been made a warrior long ago.

Longtail tired not to pin the blame on Fireheart. As hard as it was to admit, Fireheart had no control over Bluestar.

But, yet again, Fireheart was Bluestar’s favorite. And no one else mattered to her. Fireheart was Bluestar’s special thing and everything related to him was praised. The rest of the Clan was forgotten.

And Longtail, he would never be on Bluestar’s good side. Tigerstar had ruined that for him.

Longtail didn’t know who they should blame, but most often it circled back to themself.

I should’ve run the very second I heard Tigerstar try to turn me against Ravenpaw. We’d both be safe if I had done so.

I should have asked Bluestar for a different mentor, if I didn’t have Darkstripe, she would like me.

If I didn’t fight Fireheart, she would trust me.

Maybe I should have just gone with Tigerstar, and taken Swiftpaw with me.

His spiral was interrupted by a tail resting across his back. He looked up to see Swiftpaw’s mother, Goldenflower, giving them a soft smile. “Swiftpaw needs you to support him now more than ever, you can do that for him, right?”

Longtail exhaled heavily. “There’s not much else I can do.”

Goldenflower gave Longtail an affectionate lick on the head. “Good job.”

Longtail returned Goldenflower’s affection before going to gather Swiftpaw. His younger brother was still shaking, and muttering furiously to his friend, Brightpaw. His back was turned to Longtail, so it was Brightpaw that alerted Swiftpaw’s attention to his mentor.

Swiftpaw turned around to face Longtail. His face was twisted in a snarl, his pupils were tiny slits, and he was panting. The black and white tom was as big as any other adult cat, with a deep voice and proportionate features, unlike the new apprentices who still had kit features. Although most cats weren’t entirely mature until 24 moons old, Swiftpaw was more than ready to become a warrior.

There was mutual anger that the two shared, but Longtail decided to put it aside for the sake of his apprentice and brother. “Come with me, and we can do whatever you want tonight.”

Swiftpaw glanced behind at Brightpaw, who looked upset but less so than Swiftpaw. She nodded her goodbyes and Swiftpaw angrily trudged behind Longtail.

The two left camp and all the stress, to be alone in the forest. Longtail led Swiftpaw into the sandy hollow and settled down on the opposite side of his brother. “What do you want to do?”

“Nothing. Nothing I can do will change anything ever. Nothing I can do will get me anywhere. I might as well give up.”

Although Longtail understood perfectly, disappointment pierced their heart. “Don't say that.”

Swiftpaw rolled his eyes. He started pacing, tail lashing, spit flying from his jaws as he ranted. “You know it's true! Bluestar hates me and she hates you too! And we can do all we can, but there's never going to be any change.” His eyes were narrow and blazing. “Perfect Fireheart and perfect Cloudtail, no, Cloudpaw, they could do anything, and Bluestar wouldn't care! I didn’t even do anything to her! It was all Tigerstar, it's his fault, it's all his-”

Swiftpaw stopped and stared at Longtail. Longtail gulped as his apprentice started shaking. “You never should've been friends with him!” Swiftpaw shouted. “If I didn't have a Tigerstar loyalist as a mentor, I'd be a warrior by now! This is all your fault, Longtail! I hate you! I hate you!”

Longtail was stunned to see the fiery loathing in Swiftpaw’s yellow eyes. The forest was eerily silent and the wind was still, and the only sound was the black and white apprentice's heavy breathing. Blood roared in Longtail's ears.

He'd thought that about himself plenty of times, but the hurt was much more hearing it come from his own apprentice. His own brother.

Before Longtail could even respond, Swiftpaw had turned and sprinted away, his white tipped tail disappearing in the undergrowth. Longtail was left alone in the sandy hollow, alone with his guilt, alone with his thoughts.

Swiftpaw had long since become their favorite cat. It had been weird to admit it, especially since they still had two other younger brothers that they loved dearly. But Ravenpaw had been gone for so long, and before that, there was distrust and fear.

Longtail didn’t start it, but he sure as hell didn't dispel any of it. Ravenpaw must have felt so afraid and so alone. And Longtail hadn't done anything to help him. In fact, they had perpetuated it.

Dustpelt too was distant. Although they had both been in Tigerstar's group of friends when the murderous tom was still in ThunderClan, the two hadn't spoken much since his exile. They had been busy with their apprentices and other responsibilities. It was unfortunate, but Longtail again hadn't taken any actions to change it.

Longtail shook his head, as if to fling the thoughts from his ears as if they were water. “Swiftpaw’s not thinking straight. He doesn't mean it,” he reasoned out loud.

Seeing no point in staying in the hollow, they walked slowly back to camp. Although their heart felt like a heavy stone, they decided to try again with Swiftpaw in the morning. He just needed some time alone.

...

Swiftpaw flew over the ground, anger and adrenaline pulsating in his body. He couldn’t form any coherent thought other than “Why not me?” And felt nothing but envy and rage. He approached the camp, and saw Cloudtail standing guard at the thorn tunnel, starting his vigil. Swiftpaw purposely rammed into the white tom, painfully shoving him down into the thorny entrance, and scoffing at the startled “mrowp!” Cloudtail emitted.

Once back in camp, he headed straight for his apprentice’s den. He'd spend the rest of his life there, never to be anything more than a failure in the eyes of Bluestar.

It wasn't late enough for Brightpaw and Thornpaw to have returned from wherever their mentors took them to calm down, but early enough that Ashpaw and Fernpaw were settling in.

Fernpaw watched Swiftpaw cautiously as he entered but bravely stood up to greet him once he had curled into his nest.

“Are you going to be alright?” She mewed gently.

Swiftpaw tried to keep his tone neutral, Fernpaw didn't deserve his anger, she would face his same issue. “Get used to this. You'll be an apprentice your whole life. Darkstripe made sure of that. Bluestar hates you, she hates me, she hates our mentors, and she loves Fireheart. We're nothing to her.”

Fernpaw looked hurt, but she remained calm as she responded, “She's not going to be around much longer, you know.”

“She's right,” added Ashpaw. “Bluestar’s on her last life, and she's not very healthy. Fireheart will be Firestar very soon.”

Although Swiftpaw appreciated the younger apprentice’s attempt to lift his spirits, he didn’t think highly of the idea of Firestar. “Firestar doesn't like Longtail either, and he sent me away from the battle earlier today. He won't name me either.”

Neither apprentice responded, seemingly giving up their attempts to cheer him up, and they curled into their nests.

Swiftpaw tried to breathe slowly, just as Longtail had told him to do when his anger got the better of him. Longtail always knew-

Shit.

Swiftpaw had forgotten what he said to Longtail earlier.

I don't actually hate him at all. He's my brother. My mentor. I love them. I shouldn’t have said that.

The words were spoken, they couldn't be taken back. Swiftpaw would have to apologize in the morning. If he hadn’t scared Longtail off, but that was quite unlikely. Longtail was very patient with him.

He sat in silence for a while before Thornpaw and Brightpaw returned. Thornpaw looked as if he had accepted the news, but Brightpaw was still bristling. 

 Outside, Swiftpaw heard Whitestorm and Mousefur talking with each other. “-Thornpaw keeps smelling those weird scents,” Mousefur mewed. “I'm so confused, what could it be, if not the other Clans?”

“No one really knows,” Whitestorm responded. “I'm going to suggest taking a scouting patrol down to snakerocks tomorrow morning to Fireheart. Hopefully we can get to the bottom of this nonsense.”

 “Sounds good to me. I'm going to get some sleep, however. Me and Thornpaw have the dawn patrol,” Mousefur meowed, voice growing soft as she walked towards the warrior's den. “Goodnight Whitestorm.”

Swiftpaw turned to Brightpaw and Thornpaw eagerly. “Hey. I've an idea!”.

Brightpaw looked excitedly at Swiftpaw. “What is it?” She asked.

Swiftpaw grinned wide. “What if we- me, you, and Thornpaw- went to find the creature tonight?”

Brightpaw looked as if she agreed immediately. She was the more troublesome of her siblings, and he had been as upset as Swiftpaw when she had been passed over. She nodded rapidly. “Yes! Let's!”

Thornpaw's bright blue eyes squinted. “Swiftpaw, I'm going to be honest with you, that’s the worst idea I've ever heard of,” he meowed. “No one knows what it is and we'll have no warriors with us.”

Brightpaw rolled her eyes at her brother. “Swiftpaw’s warrior aged, and he'll obviously come with us. Also Brackenfur is our age and younger than Swiftpaw. Warrior status has nothing on us,” she reasoned.

“Yeah, Thornpaw,” Swiftpaw agreed. “You can stay here and go on your dawn patrol and be overlooked for the rest of your life if you want to. But we're going to force Bluestar to notice us.”

Fernpaw, who was asleep, suddenly awoke and stared at the older 3 apprentices. Her green eyes blinked like fireflies in the dark den. “What’s going on?” She asked sleepily.

“Swiftpaw and I are going to kill the forest creatures,” Brightpaw answered. “At snakerocks. You and your brother can join us.”

Swiftpaw added, “You're still young to be made warriors, but at least you'll be noticed.”

Fernpaw looked at the two older apprentices in concern, and then at Thornpaw's exasperated face. “I think that sounds too dangerous. Plus, Darkstripe's too bad of a mentor, and I don't have much fighting experience.”

Swiftpaw scoffed. “Fernpaw, my mentor had your mentor and he turned out just fine.”

“All Darkstripe does is fight,” Brightpaw replied. “Don't be so modest, Fernpaw. We spar all the time and you win more often than I do!”

Thornpaw exhaled heavily. “Stop trying to pressure her into coming on your stupid quest, if she doesn't want to come, leave her alone!”

“Oh great StarClan, would you all shut up?” Ashpaw snapped from his nest. “I'm tired. I've bigger things to worry about tomorrow than Cloudtail getting his name and not myself. Let me sleep through this.”

“Fine, whatever,” Swiftpaw hissed. “Come on, Brightpaw. Let's go.”

“Don't!” Fernpaw pleaded. “You don't know what you're up against!”

“We'll be alright, Fernpaw,” purred Brightpaw. “We can take on a badger just fine.” She rubbed Fernpaw's head. “We'll put it on the fresh-kill pile so you can taste our victory.”

“Yuck,” mumbled Ashpaw. “I won't be eating it.”

Swiftpaw crawled to the entrance of the apprentice's den and poked his head outside. The camp was empty, and the air was brisk and chilly, and smelt of ice. The first snowfall would happen soon. There was no one around, and faint snoring echoed around the deserted camp. “Coast's clear,” Swiftpaw declared to Brightpaw. “We can use the nursery back entrance so we won't run into Cloudtail. Even if he wouldn't notice if a deer walked through that tunnel.”

Thornpaw made a nervous chirp. “This is a bad idea, you two.”

Brightpaw scoffed. “My mentor is Whitestorm, I can take on anything. And Swiftpaw’s got more mentorship than even the deputy. We'll be fine.”

Thornpaw sounded as if he wanted to say more, but hesitated. “Well, when your face gets ripped off by a badger, don't say I didn't warn you.”

“Then you can say the greatest phrase of all time,” Swiftpaw teased. “If we don't come back, you get to say ‘I told you so.’ So we both got something going for us.”

“If you're not back by the time Mousefur gets him up, I'm telling,” Fernpaw called out in response.

Brightpaw squeezed out of the apprentice's den. “Oh, we'll be back long before then.”

Swiftpaw crawled after her. Fur fluffed up from the cold night air and from anticipation, he and Brightpaw made their way carefully behind the nursery and up the slope of the camp. Swiftpaw hoped that his younger siblings wouldn't wake his mother up if they heard the rocks sliding from the wall. Tawnykit and Bramblekit weren't heavy sleepers and had a knack for tattling. Goldenflower would never allow this.

Once the two had made it over the rise, they took off at a run. Brightpaw was laughing loudly, leaping from rocks and sailing through the air. Swiftpaw smiled and showed off his skills to her. He sprang from a boulder and twirled in the air before landing gracefully on his paws. “Tada!”

“Woah,” Brightpaw purred. “Neat!”

“I'm just like a bird,” the black and white tom gloated. He stopped to catch his breath, sniffing the air. His heart thundered in his chest. “Smell anything?”

Brightpaw playfully pounced on Swiftpaw as his nose was to the ground. “Here comes the badger!” She yelped, shoving him to the ground.

“Oh, lay off,” Swiftpaw purred, rolling around and batting at her. “Seriously though, we have to save our energy.”

Brightpaw let him up and shook out her fur. “Whitestorm says most of the prey has been found around snakerocks,” she said. “It's the best place to start.”

Swiftpaw shrugged. “Alright.”

Brightpaw took the lead in the direction of snakerocks. “What do you think it is?”

“I'm pretty sure it's a badger,” Swiftpaw responded. “But I hope it's not a fox. I mean-” Swiftpaw interrupted himself arrogantly, “Not that I can't kill a fox, but Longtail's other parents and littermate were killed by one. So he'd be worried about me.”

Brightpaw looked back at Swiftpaw, tail swishing snarkily. “Have you ever seen a fox?”

“… No,” he admitted. “But Longtail says they're big and red and have mean teeth.”

Brightpaw laughed. “They aren't that big. Like, maybe a bit bigger than my father. You remember how big he was, right?”

Swiftpaw’s nerves heightened at the thought of a creature bigger than Lionheart, who was massive. But yet again, Swiftpaw was only a kit when Lionheart was alive, and he had seemed gigantic. But, Brightpaw wasn't afraid, and he had grown much since kithood. He decided that meant he shouldn't be either. She had inherited her father's large stature, so a fox really couldn't be much larger than she was.

The long walk to snakerocks was quiet, but the buzz of anticipation was almost tangible in the air. Swiftpaw inhaled deeply, and picked up the odd scents getting stronger. “We're getting close to snakerocks! Smell that?”

The ginger and white she-cat sniffed the air tentatively as she slithered through the rocky forest floor. “Yeah. It's not a fox, but it smells a bit similar to one.”

Swiftpaw vaguely recognized the scent too. “It almost smells like a dog!”

“Dog?” Brightpaw questioned. “Without its twoleg?”

Swiftpaw nodded. Dogs are easy enough. Small, yappy, annoying. We can kill it easily!

“I saw a dog once,” Brightpaw meowed. “It was only about the size of Fireheart.”

Fireheart size? Maybe Bluestar won't care after all.

“Well, let's go find it.” Swiftpaw shook the idea away. He didn't come all this way for nothing. “We get to tell the others that we told them so!”

“Hooray,” Brightpaw purred. She stopped as she nearly stepped on a dead rabbit. “Look, it doesn't even eat its prey! We need this back home,” she hissed. “Greedy sods.”

Swiftpaw nodded, following what seemed to be a trail of dead rabbits. “It's leading us right to it. Idiot."

The two followed the scattered carcasses until they reached what appeared to be a large cave behind the pile of rocks that made up snakerocks. The smell of dog was pungent, and Swiftpaw wrinkled his nose. “Gross.”

Brightpaw's eyes flashed mischievously. “Arf arf arf!” She bellowed into the tunnel.

Swiftpaw stared at her. “What was that?”

Brightpaw laughed. “I'm pretending to be a dog. To annoy it. Arf arf!”

Swiftpaw chuckled. “Arf arf arf!” His deeper voice couldn't quite replicate the annoying, high pitched yapping of a dog as well as Brightpaw could. “Arf arf, stupid dog!”

Inside the cave, something stirred.

“Yeah, come on out, you dumb dog!”

-Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr-

Brightpaw stopped, fur fluffing up. “What was that?” She whispered to Swiftpaw.

Swiftpaw paused and listened closely. That didn't sound like a dog.

“Pack, pack,” a deep voice echoed from the cave. Deep.

Swiftpaw’s heart pounded. “Brightpaw, we should-”

He didn't get to finish his sentence. Fast as a snake, a giant creature tumbled from the cave, bowling Swiftpaw over and throwing the tom into the air.

“Swiftpaw!”

This was a dog, yes, but like nothing Swiftpaw had ever seen before. This creature was huge, way bigger than Lionheart, maybe even bigger than two Lionhearts. Its breath was rancid, its teeth were sharp, its body was straight muscle.

Swiftpaw landed with a thud on the ground, several tail lengths away from the mouth of the cave. Forget this! This will need the whole Clan to kill!

“Brightpaw!” Swiftpaw shrieked, feeling fear stronger than anything he'd ever felt before roaring in his blood. His friend was frozen in shock, staring at the dog in front of her, too afraid to move. “Brightpaw, run!”

There was a tree, very close to Swiftpaw. He leapt onto the trunk and hauled himself up, watching as Brightpaw snapped from her trance and tore away from the cave.

Another dog emerged from the cave, and two dogs were now chasing Brightpaw. Swiftpaw screamed, hyperventilating, shaking, as they snapped at her tail and shoved each other over for a chance to bite her.

“Kill, kill!” The dogs were barking at each other with horrendous voices. 

Swiftpaw couldn't think, he could hardly even breathe, he stayed watching Brightpaw, as she scrambled to the tree and started climbing faster than Swiftpaw had ever seen any cat climb in their life.

“Pack, pack!”

Then, there was a third dog. This one was faster than the other two, and had reached the tree by the time Swiftpaw managed to haul himself onto a branch.

“Brightpaw!” He wailed, heart in his throat. He thrust out a paw for Brightpaw to hold onto, hoping he could pull her up higher before the dogs-

She wasn't fast enough. One of the beasts fastened its jaws around her puffed tail and yanked her down.

“Swiftpaw! Swiftpaw, help me!” She cried, tears in her eyes, jaws open wide in panic.

Another dog bit down hard on her face. She yelled once and then went quiet as the first dog let go of her tail and the second dog shook her.

She was like wet moss.

“Kill, kill!”

Swiftpaw’s paws went to his face at first, screaming and crying, but he knew there was nothing panic could help. Even as the terror shredded at his heart, he swallowed down his sobs. And as the second dog released Brightpaw and she went flying through the air, blood streaming out behind her, Swiftpaw decided he had to be brave.

He jumped.

He jumped down, hoping to land squarely on a dog's head, to claw its eyes and send it yelping in pain. Time slowed to nothing as he fell, and he watched Brightpaw bounce to the ground. The two dogs that had a hold of her raced after her, huge paws thundering on the ground.

His eyes locked on Brightpaw, Swiftpaw hadn't even watched for the dogs. Blinding hot pain exploded around his hind leg and foot.

StarClan, my whole leg is in its mouth.

The pain made him want to puke, but as his claws slid out and sliced at the dog's inner jaws, fiery anger ignited in his body. Shocked, the dog quickly dropped him, and Swiftpaw clumsily tumbled to the ground.

“Pack, pack!”

There were huge puncture wounds in his foot and his underbelly throbbed with the ache of a deep wound slathered with saliva. Swiftpaw wanted to cry. Fuck. This hurts.

Momentarily distracted by the cuts inside its mouth, the dog didn't pay attention to Swiftpaw. The apprentice tried to run and defend Brightpaw, but his leg buckled and the pain made him whimper.

Brightpaw's attackers turned their attention to him.

“Kill, kill!”

They were huge. Their eyes were cold, their teeth were lethal.

Teeth yet again clamped onto Swiftpaw’s body, a dog had picked him up by the torso. Agony. Pure agony and horror had lodged themselves in Swiftpaw’s belly. The dog shook its head. Swiftpaw felt the pain grow, more and more intense. He kicked and swat desperately at the dog's head, but as its jaws pressed harder, Swiftpaw grew weaker.

Weak. So weak. His vision was fuzzy and he could barely think of anything besides the horrible pain in his belly and back.

Something felt off.

His insides-

No.

StarClan, no.

He could see his organs as the dog released him and he flew through the air. Like a bird. Blood came up through his throat and he vomited the hot, sticky substance. It was cold, it was painful, it was oh so bloody.

He wanted his mother. He wanted Longtail. He was afraid.

He hit a rock, head on, and slammed to the ground. He couldn’t even feel the pain anymore.

“Momma…”

She had come, and she was standing over him. Her tongue licked his head. It was warm. Her tongue was so warm. Longtail was there too, he barreled on top of Swiftpaw, just like he was an apprentice and Swiftpaw was a kit again. They were heavy, and… wet. Maybe they went swimming? Did it rain?

Goldenflower’s tongue had made his head wet, and Longtail's wet fur had soaked Swiftpaw to the bones. But he wasn't cold. He was so, so warm.

His littermate, Lynxkit, was playing with something. Something long and thin. She must've found a worm. It looked like a worm. She was playing with worms.

Where was he?

He couldn’t remember what had happened. Why am I warm and wet?

He couldn't take a full breath because Longtail was so heavy. But his paws were too heavy to do anything. StarClan, he was tired. Exhausted.

I should go to sleep.

Yes. I think I'll go to sleep.

...

When Longtail woke up, the air in the den was cold. It had been threatening to snow for the past little while, possibly today would finally be the day where the clouds would give up the little flurries. They stretched and shook the sleep from their muscles. Swiftpaw would be calm now, and he could have a rational chat with Longtail.

Cloudtail hadn't come in from his vigil yet, which Longtail found odd, being that the dawn patrol group was gone. But he shrugged it off and left the den.

He was immediately greeted by Dustpelt, who had a solemn look on his face. “Stay here a moment, Longtail. Something's up.”

Longtail was confused. “Huh? What do you mean?”

Dustpelt glanced around as if he didn’t want to explain anything. “There’s two apprentices missing. Fernpaw told Fireheart about it, and Ashpaw told me-”

“Who's missing?” Longtail demanded, even though he already knew that Swiftpaw would be one of them. He had a troublesome streak. “Where are they?”

“Fireheart, Sandstorm, Cinderpelt, and Cloudtail have gone to collect them from snakerocks,” Dustpelt answered. “Swiftpaw and Brightpaw left in the middle of the night to kill the creature that has been killing our prey.”

Longtail relaxed a little. “So, like a badger?”

Dustpelt's tail flicked anxiously. “That’s what we hope. But they apparently promised they'd be back by dawn, so the younger apprentices and Thornpaw were worried.”

Longtail huffed nervously. “Alright, alright, dawn, okay… Swiftpaw’s big. He can handle this.”

Dustpelt brushed against Longtail's face. “He's got the finest mentor in the Clans. I'm sure he's fine.”

The relationship between Dustpelt and Swiftpaw was odd. Although they shared no blood, they did share a father. Patchpelt had scrambled in grief after losing Fuzzypelt, Robinwing, and Cherrypaw in the fox attack that he had leapt at the opportunity to be Goldenflower’s surrogate. Longtail and Dustpelt felt as if Patchpelt had betrayed his mates in doing so. Ravenpaw had been too shy to make any real stance, but both brothers knew that the nervous black tom was upset too.

Although Longtail had found it easy to forgive his father and form a bond with his half siblings, Dustpelt had wanted nothing to do with Patchpelt afterwards. At least he didn't treat Swiftpaw poorly.

Longtail wanted to say something snide, such as, “You've ignored us for moons, why would you care now?” But kept it to themself. Dustpelt had set aside the past familial grievances to comfort Longtail. So they returned the affection. “I've missed you,” he meowed softly.

“Yeah. I'm sorry I've been distant. It's just been crazy lately, and after Patch- I mean, Papa died, seeing Swiftpaw is hard.”

The mention of Swiftpaw sent another wave of fear down Longtail's spine. “When Swiftpaw comes back, we can start again.”

“I'd like that.”

The two sat in their comfort for another moment before Dustpelt pulled away. “I need to take Ashpaw hunting, but I'll be around later. When you need me.”

“I don’t think I will,” Longtail replied, but it was more to convince himself than it was to assure Dustpelt. The dark brown tom seemed to recognize this, and gave a weak smile before collecting Ashpaw and nudging him out.

In the meantime, Longtail paced about the camp. He made his laps, stepping carefully over the debris in camp, worrying up a storm. He's going to be so hurt, mauled, oh why didn't he think to get me? I would've been able to help! I know he's stubborn but couldn't he just think to ask for my help?

StarClan, please, spare my brother. He's still immature and impulsive. Please don't let him be too hurt. Please.

When the search party made it back to camp, Longtail was too afraid to look. Squeezed his eyes shut and waited for Cinderpelt to give him the news.

But it was Goldenflower’s blood-curdling scream that snapped their eyes open.

At first, they saw Brightpaw laying across Cloudtail and Sandstorm's backs. Half of her face was gone, and she was being hurried to the medicine den.

Fireheart had a mass of black, red, and white in his jaws. His eyes were full of sorrow and regret, and they met Longtail's. The body looked horrible. Innards skewed, fur ripped out, limbs mangled, head split. It wouldn’t have been an easy death. The dried blood coating the fur showed that it would’ve been long, painful, and terrifying.

Goldenflower made it to Fireheart before any other cat could. He placed the disfigured body gently at her paws, and she wailed. She gathered the young cat in her forelegs, holding them close. They looked so fragile and small in her grasp.

Longtail didn’t want to approach. Some part of him thought that if he didn’t actually get a good look at the body, then it wouldn't be Swiftpaw’s. In Longtail’s mind, Swiftpaw was still alive. His belly was closed and his coat was full and healthy. He had bright eyes and a toothy grin. He laughed, and his lungs heaved with each cheerful inhale. 

This body that Goldenflower was holding, it was some other unfortunate black and white tom… with the same body shape. And white tipped tail.

No. It was Swiftpaw, and it would always be Swiftpaw. 

That was his body, his blood, StarClan, his organs gathered in the grip of his heartbroken mother.

The camp suddenly seemed so small and quiet. Longtail could see that Fireheart had approached him and was speaking, but he couldn’t hear anything.

Anything except the drone of Longtail’s thundering heart.

Their belly clenched painfully, and their head felt oddly cold and achy.

Fireheart was still talking, and his mouth looked as if he was saying Longtail’s name.

“Longtail. Longtail. Hey, Longtail. Do you hear me? Longtail, come back to us.”

“No.”

He couldn’t even hear himself.

Why wasn’t he crying? He had for the death of all his parents, for Chestnutkit, for Cherrypaw, and for Ravenpaw’s supposed death.

But why not for Swiftpaw? Why not for his favorite cat of all?

The center of camp was crowded with cats, shocked from the news of Swiftpaw and Brightpaw. But Longtail couldn’t see anyone other than Goldenflower and her kit held so lovingly in her grasp.

Their paws felt like boulders as they came to join the golden queen’s grief. The world seemed so small, and occasionally they brushed against a cat who was invisible.

And when they finally reached Swiftpaw, the world came back all at once.

Too much.

ThunderClan was too loud. The morning was too bright. Longtail’s heart was too strong.

Longtail’s heart was dead in front of him.

Swiftpaw’s face was nearly unrecognizable. His head had split open and it looked as if his body had been gnawed upon. Bones were sticking from his pelt, skin and muscle hanging from strings. It would’ve been slow and painful.

Nothing could stop the wounded animal sounds from leaving Longtail’s throat.

This is what happened to disrespected prey.

This wasn’t supposed to happen to Swiftpaw. Not to poor Swiftpaw.

His darling brother, treated like worthless prey. Not even eaten properly, although Longtail knew that if he had been devoured it wouldn’t make him less upset.

Goldenflower released her grip on the body and curled up within herself, sobbing loudly, yelling, “Not my baby, not my baby!” Over and over again.

Swiftpaw’s face- what was left of it- at least looked peaceful. As Longtail curled around the bloodied body, they wondered what Swiftpaw had thought in those last moments. Did he think of them? Did he wish that he hadn’t told Longtail that he hated them?

Who took him to StarClan once his suffering had ended? Was it Lynxkit? Did he race to play with her like he did when they were just kits?

Swiftpaw smelled of death and decay. Decay, like bad prey.

That was a smell for dead creatures. Not for Swiftpaw.

Swiftpaw.

It was all he’d ever be.

Longtail decided then and there that he couldn’t let that happen.

“My darling Swiftpaw,” he whispered, throat choked and mouth wet with drool from crying, “You chased for moons. You chased after me, as I ran with you to help you reach what you wanted. What you dreamed. For so long, you chased endlessly.”

Longtail stared at the sky. It was as grey as his world now. He stared at their Clanmates, who had turned to Goldenflower, the medicine den, or each other.

They were alone, in this moment, with Swiftpaw.

“You can stop chasing now, sweet brother. Swiftchase. I name you Swiftchase.”

It was a little ceremony that no one heard, but that was the point. It was for him and Swiftchase; their special moment. Belonging to them and them alone.

And as Longtail cried heavily into the mangled body of his beloved brother, he hoped that StarClan would hear and approve of his choice.

As the day dragged on and the time came for the elders to bury Swiftchase, Longtail moved for the first time since he had first lied down. The elders had come back from digging the grave, and the night had come. The air was cold, but Longtail felt strangely warm.

Goldenflower was curled across from him, and her other kits had their faces buried in her belly fur. It made Longtail’s heart break all over. Swiftchase loved those kits dearly, and it must have been traumatizing for them to see their older brother’s mutilated body.

“I gave him a warrior name,” Longtail blurted out to her. He was surprised at how dry his mouth felt, and by the raw ache in his throat. “I should’ve included you in the moment, but I think we were both too sad to really comprehend something like that.”

Goldenflower stared back with eyes that reflected deep, agonizing sorrow. But she mustered up a slight smile. “What did you name him?”

“Swiftchase,” Longtail responded. A lump caught in his throat and made his jaw ache. “So he no longer has to chase after becoming a warrior.”

Goldenflower reached her forepaws out to cup them under Longtail’s face. Her tongue rasped gentle, loving licks over their face. “That’s perfect. Swiftchase would be proud.”

Tawnykit detached herself from her mother, but stayed close as she noticed that Goldenflower’s expression changed to one of panic, seeing her kit walk away from her. The little tortishell kit collected a pile of moss from behind her mother. “Dustpelt told me to give his to you,” she said, the moss hanging heavy in her little jaws. “It’s from Swiftpaw’s nest.” I mean, Swiftchase’s nest.”

Longtail took it and sniffed it. It smelled so nice, Swiftchase’s real scent, much purer than any of his fur could have been.

Goldenflower released Longtail’s head to pull her daughter back to her, and tucked her into her belly, next to Bramblekit. The little tabby was asleep.

“The last thing he said to me was that he hated me,” Longtail admitted after Tawnykit too had fallen into the rhythmic, deep breathing of sleeping kit. “I know it wasn’t true, but I wish I had heard it from him before he died.”

Goldenflower exhaled shakily. “I can’t speak for him, but I know he loved you, so, so much. He was so excited to be your apprentice. He told me all about you, all you had taught him, everyday.”

Tears ran down Longtail’s face once more. “Did he?”

“You were his favorite cat, Longtail,” Goldenflower purred. She lapped Longtail’s tears away, and they lapped away hers in turn. “Even if he got that upset with you, not to say it was justified, but I know he didn’t mean it.”

Longtail felt a steady purr rumble in his chest. “Thank you.”

“Of course, my dear.”

Longtail looked up to the sky. The clouds had gone, and there was no snow.

But looking into the endless beauty of Silverpelt, he smiled.

The stars were twice as bright as usual.