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"Heh... Hey guys!!" Logan smirked. Previously, he was watching a Ryan's Toys Review video! Ryan was shipping himself to Ronald McDonald at 3am! And it got five hundred million viewbs. How awesome sauce dudettes! As he entered the poor hopital (a poor version of a hospital for poor people apart of poor families in poor towns which is usually caused by a poor economy.) How awesome dude! However, the receptionist was passed out. High on shrooms question mark? Anyways, she reeked of shrooms and........ beer. However, someone snuck behind him.
"Hey little boy... I'm Houndtrigger...." A mysterious man snuck up behind him.
:Holy smokes!" Logan howled like a boss.
"I'm... An ear wax doctor..." Houndtrigger whispered into Logan's ear, massaging the guy's shoulder. "And i can tell you need one.. Logan... I was peering into your delicate ears earlier...your ear wax is elusive...." Houndtrigger lolled his tongue out, poking the inisde of Logan's ear.
"Jeepers Creepers!" Logan roared, pushing Houndtrigger away. "No! I mean...WEll.... The views...THE VIEWS!!!!!"
"What do you say little guy.........will you let me clean your ears...with my.....little assistant.... Frank Iero of Hit Band My Chemical Romance."
Frank waved at Logan, in his little itty bitty white lab coat. Except it wasn't. He was wearing a sexy nurse costume from Spirit Halloween, like a pervert.
"Why's he in a sexy nurse costume? WHy are his titties out?" Logan asked, staring at Iero's titties bulging out the shirt.
"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to little boy..." Houndtrigger whispered, once again licking Logan's ear. "Let's go to the operating rooom,,,,,,, us alone..."
"Vengo anch'io ragazzi!" Iero spoke exotically in his little foreign nonenglish language of Italian.
"FINE!! But only IIIII get to lick Logan's ear... OKAY?!"
"Sì, la mia maglietta è rossa" Iero giggled, twirling his hair as he pulled down his shoulder sleeve, revealing his red bra strap. Meaning he lied, his red wasn't shirt, it was his bra! LIAR!
"Good boy Iero."
The three went into ROOM 243 to preform the operation. Houndtrigger strapped Logan onto the operating bed with red rope.
"What is this?"
"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to boy.." He whispered once more, licking his ear again.
"Cucchiai! Cucchiai! Cucchiai!" Iero danced like a whore who wears sexy nurse costumes from Halloween stores.
"Shut up Iero! I'm trying to focus on Logan's ear wax— stop it!"
Iero lowered his head in regret. "Mi dispiace. Bau Bau!! Voglio dei dolcetti, padrone."
"You're not getting shit! Now let me operate."
He got his spoon out and began digging into Logan.s ear. Logan had a big gala appple in his mouth gagging him. To prevent bro was speaking i guess.
The spoon curved into the tiny crevice of his ear canal. Pushing through the wet wex inside, scrapping against irritated red skin. Logan began to cry, sniffling and ears burning. But Houndtrigger wouldn't stop. He kept pusshing further and further, poking into his ear rums. HE pushed and pushed unitl BOOM!!!! Hi ear exploded, and blood was everywhere. Logan let out a muffled howl.
"OH SHIT!!" Houndtrigger growled. "FUck... Now I'm going back to jail! At least there's more dirty man ears I ccan lilck...mmhhhhh" He moaned
"Ci licenziano. Mi devi ancora del cibo per cani, altrimenti ti denuncio per maltrattamento di animali."
"Fuck off Iero! I just lost the chance to lick the ear canals of his guy!"
"Whatever..."
"What'd you say?"
"Che cosa?"
"Did you speak English?"
"...Se mi denunci, chiamo il 911"
"Oh fuck you Iero!!""
Logan was still in scorching pain, writhing in bed as his ears bleed. Of course! Ear drums exploding is not a pleasant experience. But he couldn't really speak...you know... because of the apple. As Houndtrigger and Iero argued, Logan lowkey doed. The end.. also the youtube camer a died whoopsie