Archive of Our Own

Beth sat on the ground, holding her cheek for a moment, before a sarcastic laugh erupted from her chest. It wasn’t the first time she punched Jamie in the head. It wasn’t the first time she attacked him, and was pushed off. She scratched him, slapped him, kicked at him, would have probably bitten him if given the chance; but he never hit her back. He never slapped her hands away or accidentally hurt her. He definitely never punched her in the face. No other man ever had either. It was a different feeling than trading punching with another woman. He hit her harder than she’d been hit before. Her jaw already ached and the side of her head began to throb. But she couldn’t help finding a small amount of humor in the situation. She wasn’t afraid of him. He wasn’t coming after her once she was on her ass. She was more in shock than anything else. “A man woulda walked away,” she half laughed, before tensing when she saw her brother’s face. Instead of the small sense of victory she saw moments before, she now saw fear. His jaw and shoulders were tense. He started backing towards the stalls, with shame and terror in his eyes. She knew without turning around who was standing in the doorway, or she thought she did. And she couldn’t even be happy about it. Getting her brother in trouble wasn’t her intention. Having her father fight her battles and defend her every time she and her brother fought. She could fight her own battles. Shit, she had to fight everyone else’s too.

Rip tried to mind his own business. He watched in silence from the shadows as he saw Beth and Jamie begin to argue. The only reason he was there at all, he saw her walk down from the house. He didn’t think anyone was still in the barn at that hour. He thought, she was looking for him. Instead, he watched the love of his life get insulted and fly into a blind rage. The look on her face, the anger and frustration in her voice, broke his heart. He felt his own uncontrollable rage grow when he brought up their mother. He knew how she felt about that day. He knew how much she blamed herself, how she thought everyone else blamed her. She cried a thousand times on his shoulder, clung to him in the middle of the night from nightmares of that day. The hateful look on his face when the words finally reached her ears, made grip the barn door so hard, his nails started digging into the wood. But the moment Jamie drew back, and punched her in the face, he lost what was left of his mind. His blood boiled in his veins. Every muscle in his body tensed. “What the fuck is wrong with you?!” He screamed, storming towards the older man. He liked the fear he saw on his face. He enjoyed how small he could make Jamie feel with just a look. How he immediately tried to help her up, but Beth pushed his hands away, almost growling to fuck off. Rip didn’t want him touching her; he didn’t want him breathing the same air as his little sister, and obviously, she didn’t either. “Get the fuck away from her,” he barked, watching the boy stumble backwards, hitting his back on a stall door, startling himself more than the horse that started knocking against the wood.

She didn’t expect Rip to still be in the barn when Jamie called her. It was way past his normal bed time. She saw the bunkhouse lights and foreman’s house lit up before she even got off her father’s porch. She assumed everyone was in for the night. She heard the rage erupt from his chest. She’d never heard him so angry, so ready to tear someone apart. He’d told other men to get away from her, but never had she seen him ready to kill for her. He always had to be a hero. But could she really blame him this time, he’d never seen her get punched in the face by another man. It would have been better if it were her father. At least her dad knew when to stop, with the rage she saw on Rips face when she finally looked up, he wouldn’t. “I started it,” she said in defense, not in the mood for an actual murder. She usually took the blame. Most of the time she DID start it. But if Jamie wouldn’t have called her down from the house, if he hadn’t felt the need to bring up their mother, he wouldn’t be cowering away from a 230 pound cowboy. She could have kept walking. She could have ignored him, but when had she ever backed down from a fight? She wanted him to shut the fuck up. She wanted him to hurt just as bad as she did. She wanted him to feel the physical pain she experienced every time she passed their mother’s photo in the hallway. No one knew how much she continued torturing herself over something her father deemed an accident. She knew it was her fault. She felt the guilt in her bones. If her horse hadn’t spooked, her mother wouldn’t have fallen. Her horse wouldn’t have stumbled and rolled onto her chest. If she had just stayed home that day, none of it would have happened. And Jamie was right, that was the day she changed. Something inside her snapped, and she was never the same again. She didn’t cry. She didn’t whine. She didn’t let fear drive her decisions. She didn’t let her emotions dictate her life. She numbed everything.

Rip didn’t give a shit whose fault it was. She shoved him away all the time. She’s hit him a handful of those times. Not once, did he ever consider retaliating. He never thought anyone could get pleasure from hurting her, but by the instant look of gratification on his face, he was wrong. He didn’t care how many times she hit him, what she said, Jamie had the option of walking away. He could have called for any one of the cowboys still stalking around. It would have made him look much better, than knocking his sister on her ass. “John!” He screamed, knowing the older man was just on the other side of the bunkhouse scolding Jimmy.

Lloyd came running around the corner first; it didn’t take him long to figure out what had happened. He only looked at Beth still holding her cheek, and shoved the boy hard into the stall door, snarling in his face. ‘What fucking kind a man are you, boy?!’ He screamed, only turning away to yell for their father again. And Rip saw his eyes ignite with rage. “Come on,” he muttered, as he kneeled in front of her. It was like she didn’t see him. Her eyes were focused on the barn door. They could hear Johns screams of aggravation getting closer. Her body tensed every time they heard his voice echo through air. He tried calling her name, but she didn’t turn to him, until Jamie started arguing with Lloyd. She jerked away when he tried touching her cheek. Glared over his shoulder as Jamie yelled something he didn’t hear. He tried reaching for her. Getting his hand knocked away the first time he touched her arm, but she finally looked up. And he watched all the fight suddenly leave her body.

Before Beth knew what was happening, her father was running to the barn, as she finally let Rip help her to her feet. She honestly hadn’t seen him kneeling next to her. She didn’t feel HIM when something touched her arm, she couldn’t help knocking his hands away. She was too distracted by Lloyd shoving her brother into a wall when he screamed at her again. She didn’t know where the older man came from. She didn’t see him come in with Rip. She never heard him yelling. In her defense, She was a little dizzy and confused. The medication, alcohol and getting punched was almost too much for her brain to handle.

All Beth could think, as Rips arms wrapped around her back, was Jamie better be glad Lloyd was standing between him and the dark haired cowboy. That he was too busy holding her, checking on her, to pay her brother much attention. She could tell Rip wanted to kill him. She could feel the tension in his back and shoulders as her hands wandered under his leather jacket. She could feel him grinding his back teeth when she buried her face in his neck. The way his arms wrapped around her tighter, when she rested her forehead against his chest. Covering her ears, in a feeble attempt to block out the screaming and fighting going on behind them. She could feel Rip whispering against her cheek, but couldn’t hear what he was saying. She couldn’t really hear anything for a long moment, but the thoughts spinning inside her head. The way he tried to caress her cheek, tried to get her to look up, only made her mind spin faster. “Somewhere else,” was all she could mutter before her father started screaming. She couldn’t help flinching. Hiding her face in Rips chest, as his arms covered her, turning them away from the prying eyes of her family.

‘What the fuck did you do?!’ She heard her father scream. She didn’t have to look up to know he was inches from her brother’s face. She knew he was cowering away, trying to find any way to blame her. She felt she was to blame. She shouldn’t have started the fight, even if she was prepared for him to hit her back. It wasn’t the punch that hurt, it was his words. She should have made him come up to the house. If her father had been present, she probably wouldn’t have started the physical altercation. Jamie definitely wouldn’t have mentioned their mother. “Make them stop,” she muttered more to herself, but felt Rip sigh against her face. She knew neither of them could do anything to stop the snowball barreling at them. She couldn’t ask her father to stop. She couldn’t explain it was all her fault, he wouldn’t care. And Rip damn sure wasn’t gonna tell John Dutton what to do, even if it was for her.

If Beth hadn’t been in his arms, if he hadn’t felt her shaking and the harsh breath against his neck; he would have already killed him. He’d never seen anyone put their hands on John Dutton daughter, and apparently neither had he by his violent reaction. But it wasn’t only punching the woman he secretly pinned for; he heard every word the man said. Even if that was how he felt, which he knew it wasn’t, it wasn’t necessary. He wanted to hurt her in the only soft spot she had. He always felt small and insignificant compared to her. Always felt like he was second, because he was. Everyone could see his only daughter would always mean a little more to him than his three sons. He cherished her more, envied her sense of freedom. Admired her undying loyalty. She was her father made over.

Rip barely glanced over his shoulder, as he heard her pleas, running his fingers through her baby soft hair, as her fingers snaked inside his leather jacket, her nails digging into his side. He couldn’t and wouldn’t tell John Dutton what to do with his children, how he dealt with situations in his property. He wanted to, for her, but it wasn’t his place. His only job, in that moment, was protect her; the only thing he took more seriously than cowboying. “I’m sorry, baby,” he muttered against her temple. She knew he couldn’t do anything. He hadnt planned to get involved past comforting his love, but hearing the barely audible whimper pass her lips, broke something inside his chest. Hearing Jamie continuously trying to defend himself set his skin on fire.

“Jamie, why don’t you tell your dad what you said to your little sister?” He tried not to scream, as she feebly begged him to stop. But he couldn’t get the nasty words he said out of his head. He saw the pain flash in her eyes before she turned around to go after him. He saw the heartbreak that would lead to her crying for days in his bed. That would bring back the nightmares, no matter how much alcohol she drank. No one witnessed the damage their words truly did to her, except him. When the man was silent, Rip carefully covered the blondes ears, knowing she could hear him just fine, but it made him feel better. “How she killed her mother!” Rip regretted the words the second Beth heard them. Her finger tightening in his shirt, twisting the fabric. Her nails digging into his shoulder. The gasp and immediate sob that broke the silence surrounding them, shattered something within the three men.

He saw the dark look in John and Lloyd’s eyes. He saw the older man twisting the leather of his reign to stop himself from strangling the Dutton boy. His boss had a look on his face he’d never seen. He looked angry, devastated, disappointed; but the clench fist at his side told Rip he was finally ready to snap. ‘Baby girl, you didn’t do anything wrong that day. You told her you didn’t wanna get on the horse, she should have left you with me. That was her fault, honey, not yours,’ he watched her father say before having to clear his throat. Her cries were breaking something inside his soul, he didn’t know still existed; Rip knew, because he felt it too.

Beth couldn’t help but cry harder. Her father never talked to her about what happened that day. Lee had to take her to the hospital for her broken arm. They didn’t get home until after their mother’s body was taken away. Kaycee was asleep in her bed, and for once, she didn’t try to get him to move. She cuddled her little brother all night, sending her dad away when he tried to take him back to his bed. She never got back on a horse, even when her father reassured her he wouldn’t push. She barely got close to the arena, and would only go to the barn if they were already locked away. She didn’t cry in front of her family after that day. She didn’t take shit from her brothers anymore. Whatever kindness and empathy was inside her, vanished when they laid her mother in the ground. She never let fear control her life again. It hardened her in a way she knew her father hated. But what else was she supposed to do?

‘I’m so close to letting him rip you apart,’ she heard her father growl. She knew he was looking at Rips back, she could feel it. She could also feel that her cowboy would do exactly as told. He was waiting for the word, but it never came. If he let her go, if he walked away, she didn’t know if she could stand there alone. She didn’t want everyone else to see her face. She didn’t want them to see the tears and pain she’d let Jamie cause. She was supposed to be stronger, better than him. She wasn’t supposed to let him get under her skin. But something in the air, told her, her father wasn’t gonna ask Rip to do anything. He could hear her pain. He could see how much she needed her lifelong companion.

Just as her heart finally stopped hammering in her chest, Jamie was screaming again. ‘Why don’t you ask your daughter why she can’t have children? Who got her pregnant at fourteen?!’ Beth thought she was gonna vomit. Her blood ran cold, as her knees buckled. She couldn’t catch her breath. Her fingers and toes tingled with the building panic erupting in her chest. The feeling of Rips hands on her, felt like fire. Even as he shushed her, tried to stop the run away train inside her head, it was too late. She tried to struggle away. She tried feebly pushing on his chest, still hiding her face behind her hair. Now, she couldn’t even look at her safe place. Jamie had taken that from her too. “I can’t do this,” she exhaled, feeling him hold her tighter. The silence surrounding them was deafening. She didn’t dare look over Rips shoulder to catch her father’s reaction.

Rip felt Jamie’s words hit him in the chest. He felt the woman he loved began struggling to get away from him. Terror radiating off her skin. He could have let her go, he normally would. But the brokenness in her voice, her face wouldn’t let him. He held her tighter, even when he felt her knees try to give. Even when he felt he should, he didn’t let her go. None of it mattered in the end. “I already know,” he whispered low in her ear. He wasn’t a thousand percent sure, until they were sixteen and started having sex again. He saw the scar the moment her dress hit the floor. He’d seen the scar on other women, his own mother carried it. He wanted to ask. He wanted to stop and make her tell him what happened. But by the look on her face when he tried to run his fingers over it, made him not say a word; for twenty years. “I’ve always known, it doesn’t matter,” he reassured, feeling her fingers finally clutch his back again. Despite her cries, he couldn’t help sighing in relief that she didn’t continue pulling away. She didn’t continue to fight. She clung to him like her life depended on it. He couldn’t help kissing the side of her face she would allow him to see. His fingers massaging the tense muscles in her neck. Humming in her ear when she whimpered. Holding that secret for so long, not making Jamie take accountability, was killing her. The fear of him hating and leaving her was all too consuming for her to realizing he would never walk away. It was about her healing, not worrying about what everyone else thought. “Just say it; finally hold him accountable,” he encouraged, kissing the corner of her mouth, when he felt her nod against him. He knew she could physically say the words, but he didn’t know if she could emotionally. If the constant intrusive thoughts would allow her that freedom.

Beth wasn’t ready for this. Even with ‘encouragement’ to finally express her grief and rage, she still didn’t know how. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. She was supposed to tell Rip first. She never had a plan to tell anyone else. Whose business was it? Why she couldn’t have children wasn’t any business of her father’s or Kaycee’s. She hadn’t been looking for revenge when she came to the barn. She never looked for revenge for that, she tried not to think about that day in the truck. She tried to take a deep breath. She tried listening to Rips encouraging words in her ear. But all she could hear, was her own cries of pain after a surgery she didn’t ask for. And the tidal wave finally hit her right in the chest. “I asked for help; not a fucking hysterectomy,” she spat, glancing at her father for only a moment, but that’s all it took. She saw the pain and heart break. She saw the flashes of anger. She didn’t even bother looking at her brother before her head fell back to Rips chest. “He knew what they were gonna do, and lied to me,” she was barely able to say, before another round of sobs escaped her chest. Rips arms tightened around her back. She could hear the calm words in her ear for the first time, but didn’t feel she deserved them. “I’m sorry,” she chocked out, clutching his back. She didnt know who she was apologizing to. She didn’t know why she felt the need. But for a long moment, no one said a word. Not even the horses were moving as she cried like she should have been allowed to do twenty years ago. She felt Rips lips on her forehead and temple, but didn’t dare look up. She didn’t look any anyone, even when her father started hollering again. ‘Lloyd, take him to the bunkhouse; make sure all the cowboys know what he did.’ She heard the two men struggle for a moment, before her brother was shoved towards the door. She heard the bickering, the justifications and begging Jamie started doing. She heard the excuses screamed at her father, but they fell on deaf ears. ‘get your worthless fucking ass up!’ She continued hearing the older man yell, even as their voices began to fade. To her, Lloyd sounded more upset than her father, but John Dutton had more self control than most.

Rip held her tighter, as she buried her face in his neck. He could feel the tears soaking his shirt. Her fingers snaking under the fabric to feel his skin. He was so worried about the damage to her face, so focused on her shaking in his arms; he didn’t see her father watching them. “You’re okay,” he muttered in her hair. Not sure he believed the words, but felt the sigh against him. He almost pulled away when her father stopped beside them. His arms loosening around her, until the first whine broke the silence. He couldn’t help looking at the man that had every right to ask him to move, but he didn’t. John only shook his head, gently touching his daughter’s shoulder. They both felt her tense and flinch. In her defense, she couldn’t see who it was. ‘You didn’t do anything wrong that day.’ But now, none of them knew what day he was talking about. Rip had a feeling, he knew Beth felt it too. Her heart pounding hard in her chest. Her nails digging into the skin on his back. It had nothing to do with her mother. It had nothing to do with leaving her little brother in a field to watch her die. A main source of her intense emotional pain had been revealed; and she hadn’t even been able to be the one to do it. She hadn’t been allowed to take her time and tell them when she was ready. He knew if it had been her choice, she’d wanna tell him alone, probably after a dozen shots. This was NOT a conversation she was prepared for. Even with her father, the man that thought she could do no wrong, that loved her more than anyone else; she couldn’t even look up. ‘I’m sorry you didn’t feel you could come to me.’ And with that, he was gone, probably to figure out what to do with his son. Rip didn’t ask, nor did he care.

Beth didn’t move until she heard her father’s foot steps fading. She couldn’t handle seeing the pain and disappointment from the both of them. And she’d always felt Rip deserved to know first. He deserved the conversation, the details, the truth before anyone else. It was THEIR baby. It was half of him. Even if he felt he knew, she didn’t believe him. How could he? She’d never even said the words out loud, until Rip encouraged her. She could barely think them in her head without needing to vomit. “I’m so sorry…” she finally broke, hating herself for keeping her secret for so long. Hating Jamie for using it against her to gain points with her father. He couldn’t just take the ass beating he was gonna get. He couldn’t just take the lecture. He had to tear her apart with him. Always aiming to make her look worse. “I didn’t know what to do,” she cried softly, turning her face into his arm when he tried to tilt her chin. She wanted to look at him. She wanted to see his face, but she was terrified of what she’d see.

Rip didn’t make her look at him when she pulled away. He never did. When she was ready, she’d look up on her own. All he could do was massage the back of her neck and whisper into her hair. “You never have to be sorry to me.” He always meant those words. The things she did, were always to hurt herself. It had nothing to do with him. She pushed him away, to hurt herself. She ran, to punish herself. He didn’t take it personally, because he knew how she really felt. When she looked at him like he was the only man in the world, despite the words flying from her mouth, he knew she didn’t mean them. She did love him. She just couldn’t let herself fully embrace those feelings. Now he knew why. “I’m sorry for whatever I did to make you feel you couldn’t come to me,” he said with a heaviness in his chest. He assumed she was afraid he’d think it wasn’t his. That he wouldn’t want her. That he would force her to get rid of it anyway. Or force her to have it. He couldn’t imagine forcing her to do anything to didn’t want to do. He would have never allowed anyone to force her to have a child or not. He only ever wanted what she wanted. If she wanted to leave tomorrow with him, he’d follow her. As long as she didn’t run again. That’s what he feared was about to happen. “Please don’t leave again,” he finally said aloud. He never asked her stay. He never put her in a position to be more vulnerable than she was willing. He never wanted her to think he wanted to control her. But he always wanted her to stay, or ask him to go.

She tried to shake her head, she tried to open her mouth to speak, but only another broken sob came out. Hearing the heaviness in Rips voice caused her stomach to turn. Thinking he’d done something, said something to make her feel she couldn’t come to him; broke what was left of her resolve. He’d never done anything, but love and care for her. He worshipped her. It hurt even more, deeper, that he assumed she was gonna run. For the first time, the thought hadn’t crossed her mind. She hadn’t planned to run to her room and pack her things. She didn’t plan to call her boss for a transfer back to Salt LakeCity. “I’m sorry I’ve made you feel this way,” she whimpered against his neck. She never thought about the pain she was causing him every time she left. She never thought about the heart break and anxiety he felt every time she returned home; worried when she’d leave again. Now, it was all she could think about, and it was tearing her chest apart. Her stomach turned to knots. “It’s my fault,” she whimpered in defeat. It was her fault. Not using a condom one time, caused their world to turn upside down. Caused her entire perspective to change. She couldn’t even remember who forgot the damn thing in the tack room when they rode off into the woods. She knew neither were willing to ride back for it.

Suddenly, she felt herself being lifted. Cradled like glass against his chest. His arm secure around her back. The other hooked under her knees. The movement took her breath and caused her head to spin. Her arms, instinctively, wrapping around his neck; resting her head against his shoulder. “Where are we going?” She muttered, the tears momentarily ceased, mostly due to shock.

Rip was only glad she didn’t try to fight him. In the wrong mood, feeling too vulnerable she would kick and push to be put down. He put himself in that position more times than he could count to be surprised if she did. He expected it. But sighed into her hair when she didn’t. “Not far, I promise,” he whispered against her temple. He was tempted to take refuge in the tack room like they used to, but thought better of it. John and Lloyd would be bringing Jamie back through. He didn’t want Beth to hear or see any of what was about to happen. It would only add to her guilt and nightmares in the end. And what was the point in hiding in a musty old tool room, when he had a house less than fifty yards away, where no one would bother them. Where she always felt safe.

She was afraid he was taking her to the house. The last people she wanted to see was her father and brother. She didn’t want to sleep in her childhood bedroom anymore. She didn’t want to walk around and be reminded of her mother’s death with every picture she saw in the hallway. When Rip turned away from the house, towards the foreman’s cabin, she relaxed again. She didn’t have one bad memory inside those walls. Her voice didn’t echo, as if a ghost were whispering in her ear. There were no odd shadows that caused her to question her sanity. No imaginary foot steps and creaks on the stairs. She didn’t have to be on alert, or defensive. She didn’t need to be prepared for anything. She just needed to relax. “What’s gonna happen to Jamie?” She couldn’t help whispering, not really expecting a response. How was he supposed to know what was going on in her father’s head? It was her brother, his son; would her dad really hurt him?

Rip couldn’t help but sigh against her cheek. Knowing he gave her the answer without speaking. The silence and pause was enough. The way he couldn’t stop his arms from tightening around her; she knew. That didn’t mean HE wanted to be the one to tell her. Wasn’t it her father’s job to talk to her? What if he told her wrong, even though he knew what was about to happen. Jamie would be reported as a missing person in a few days, and never found. How was he supposed to tell her? “I wish you wouldn’t ask things like that,” he said, a little out of breath by the time he reached the porch. She was right, he really needed to do something about his cardio.

Beth could feel it in Rips body, as his arm tightened around her back. She didn’t need to feel his steps falter or the heavy sigh against her face, but it was confirmation. “They’re gonna kill him, aren’t they?” She saw something snap in her father’s eyes when her forced hysterectomy was revealed, her pregnancy. When she realized Rip had gotten her pregnant at fourteen. It was as if his world had been torn apart, his heart was broken. He was infuriated. And she was a little terrified. She was even terrified by the look she saw when she finally looked at Rip.

Rip was silent as he carried her up the steps of the foreman’s cabin. Far enough away from the bunkhouse and barn, for her to not hear if anything did happen. He didn’t want her involved. He didn’t want her knowing or seeing anything until it was over. He honestly didn’t know what the other cowboys were gonna do. He didn’t know how far Lloyd and John would allow it to go. But from his own experience, Beth would only have one brother left come morning. He was afraid of her reaction. They just lost Lee. Kaycee still hadn’t come back to the ranch full time. She was about to be all alone with her father in the big house. Unless she was willing to take his offer of moving into the foreman’s cabin. That would be his dream; for her to never leave.

He carefully sat her back on her feet, only to open the front door, but she didn’t move when he did. She leaned against the frame, staring down at the bunkhouse. Her cheeks and nose were still slightly flushed. Her eyes were watery. She chewed her bottom lip. Her chin trembled, as she wrapped her arms around herself. He saw so much pain when he looked at her face. So much defeat and unease. “I don’t want to be the one to tell you what I thinks gonna happen,” he admitted, glancing back at the bunkhouse to see what she was looking at, but there was nothing there. She was waiting, and he didn’t want to be the one to shatter her heart for the second time that night. Despite their conflict, the things that happened, she loved a part of her brother; just like he loved a small part of her. If they didn’t, they wouldn’t fight. They wouldn’t bicker and push each others buttons. They would just walk away, not speak. But they did care and worry for the other, he could see it in her eyes.

Beth chewed the inside of her cheek, as Rips words circled around in her head. She could see the stress and pain on his face when she finally looked at him. She looked away quickly, but she saw the fear in his eyes. He never wanted to tell her bad news. He never wanted to break her heart and hear the pain of her cries. She knew her pain, hurt him more than his own. But she’d rather know now, than find out in the morning. Or when the police came looking for him. She didn’t need anymore surprises. “Tell me anyway,” she whispered, running her hands up and down her arms, as the cold air chilled her skin. Without having to ask, or say a word, Rip stepped into her space, blocking the freezing Montana wind. She didn’t stop the corner of her mouth from twitching, despite the situation they found themselves in, his pure sweetness with her, always made her smile.

Rip carefully watched her face. No matter how old they got, she always looked fourteen to him. Her eyes were so broken, so innocent and sweet; a bright green. Her makeup was gone, leaving her beautiful freckles on display. Her bottom lip slightly red from the constant biting. He didn’t want to break her heart all over again. Jamie already hurt her enough for one night. But she would know come morning. She would sneak out while he was still asleep, if he didn’t tell her something. John would beat him senseless if he found his daughter wandering around the barn in the middle of the night, looking for her dead brother; when he left her in the cowboys care. When he gave him the okay to protect her, while he took care of everything else. “He’ll be dead by morning,” he replied, giving nothing else. There was nothing he could give. He didn’t know what John planned to do. He didn’t know how violent he would let Lloyd and the other ranch hands become before he ended it. He could be wrong. Jamie might get his ass kicked and taken to the vet. In a few days he would be fine, but Rip doubted it.

He didn’t know how to read her reaction. To him, it looked like she’d been punched in the chest. A few more tears falling. She struggled to take deep breaths, as she leaned her head against the door. Shaking her head, as she covered her face. “Baby…” he muttered, running his fingers along the hand covering her face. Kissing her fingers and knuckles, until she slowly let it drop to his chest. The tears slowly running down her cheeks, burned his hand as he brushed them away. He couldn’t stop himself from blocking her view from the bunkhouse door, as her eyes continued glancing behind him. No one was gonna come out until they were sure he had Beth inside. Lloyd would send someone to check or wait for John to return from the main house. Nothing would be done until their father was there to see it.

His fingers running up and down her bare arm, up her neck. Watching the shiver run down her body and goosebumps develop on her skin. He gently cupped her chin, tilting her head to finally look at her cheekbone. Surprisingly, she didn’t fight, she sighed and leaned into his touch. The skin was red and already turning a light black and blue. It would look once over the next few days, but nothing was broken. He couldn’t help kissing her cheek, trying to erase the pain. “If you don’t want that to happen; I need to call your dad,” he whispered softly against her skin, feeling her whimper, and grip his shirt. Pulling him against her harder than expected, until he had her softly pinned against the door. All he could do was follow her lead, gently kissing her jaw and neck. His fingers wandering to her waist and pulling her closer. Gliding his hands up her mostly bare back.

She didn’t know if she really wanted Jamie dead. She said it a thousand times, threatened it. Had nightmares about it. Sometimes it was an accident. But in reality, she would have probably done it herself at some point. The way he emotionally and mentally pushed her closer and closer to the edge, enjoying every second of pissing her off or driving her insane. The way he tried to turn their father and little brother against her. He tried to get her taken off the financial and bank statements for years. Tried to get her taken off her father’s power of attorney and medical or advanced directives. If it were up to Jamie, she wouldn’t be part of the family at all. Sometimes, she thought he wished she died on that ‘operating’ table. “No…” she exhaled, letting her head fall back against the door. Feeling Rip exam the bruise on her cheek. She doubted it looked that bad. She would have a headache and sore jaw tomorrow, but she’d be fine. She let him pamper her with unnecessary attention. Shower her face with soft kisses. Rarely did she allow him to take care of her; and it was still difficult to allow it now. But it felt too good just to breathe. “He blamed me for what he did,” she couldn’t help whimpering, as he caressed her cheek. She wanted to hide her face, but he held her in place, as her eyes fluttered open, connecting with his. They were such a deep, bright blue, she could get lost in them for hours. It was like staring at the most peaceful ocean. “I asked for help,” she muttered, more to herself. She didn’t know what she wanted to do when she went to her brother for help. She didn’t know what could be done. Sex ed at her local conservative high school was trash. She didn’t even know what her period was when it happened on Christmas. And even after her mother ‘talked to her’, explaining nothing, she still had no idea what was happening with her body. Didn’t learn how to use a tampon until LYNELL took the time to teach her. When the pregnancy test turned out positive, she had absolutely no idea what to do. She assumed, Jamie would lead her in the right direction; not take her future children. “I didn’t even know what an abortion was,” she couldn’t help closing her eyes as the tears fell like a dam had broken loose. Not one person at the clinic explained what they were about to do. They just told her everything would be fine. She would be fine when she woke up. She was anything but fine. “He said it was fine. That everything would be fine,” she mumbled, wanting to vomit as she remembered the unsure look on her brother’s face when he helped her from the truck.

Before she could continue, Rip pulled her inside the cabin and slammed the door. She might not care in the moment that everyone heard her most intimate business, but she’d care later. The cowboy didn’t want anyone hearing her cry and finally get two decades of pain off her chest. “Sit with me,” he muttered, when she tried to lean against the closed door. She was mentally and emotionally exhausted. He could tell a headache was growing, as she rubbed the back of her neck. He could see the anxiety building in her chest, with every harsh exhale. He could tell her cheek and jaw hurt, but refused to complain. He’d have to bribe her to ice it later. She looked uncomfortable in her own skin, as she shifted from one foot to the other. She didn’t hold his gaze for long before looking away. “Come on, baby,” he whispered, running a hand up her arm, feeling her try to fold in on herself. The wheels turning violently in her head. Scratching and tugging at the hair tie around her wrist. The realization of what happened finally settling under her skin.

When she still didn’t move, He took the risk and gently grabbed her arm. pulling her to the couch, onto his lap, draping the blanket over them, before she had time to protest. Fearful if he gave her the options, she’d run back outside. But she didn’t have put up much of a struggle. She didn’t pull away or tell him no. She strangely followed him willingly. Her compliance and pliability was more concerning to him, than knowing she hide her pregnancy for twenty years. The defeated look in her eyes cut deeper than hearing he had a child, and it was gone before they could properly comprehend what it meant. Of course he knew; he’d always known. Just because they stopped having sex at fourteen, right after it happened, didn’t mean they didn’t start right up again at sixteen, seventeen, eighteen. He knew her body better than he knew his own. He memorized every scar, beauty mark, and imperfections on her skin. He knew about the thin, barely visible scars on her thighs. The one on her elbow and knee from the fall the day her mother died. The one in her hairline, by her left ear. He didn’t know where it was from, but he knew it was there. “I’m so sorry, baby,” he said as her head fell to his shoulder, tucking her hand under her chin, protecting herself. Trying to make herself small.

It took Beth a few long minutes to gain her bearings. To comprehend what was happening. Playing what HAD happened over and over again in her head. Trying to figure out when her night had taken a horrible turn. Had she been drinking since supper; yep. Had she already taken a few addarall to start going over her father’s financial records; check. She was already agitated. Already had a fucking headache, quickly growing into a migraine. And she hadn’t found that prescription since she arrived. When Jamie had text her to come to the barn, she assumed it was over the paperwork she was about to read. She assumed it was gonna be something involving her father and the ranch; something that would matter to her. Instead he wanted to run his mouth, just to feel he still had control over their father’s decisions. That he was the only one advising and whispering in his ear. He was the most selfish human being she’d ever had the displeasure of knowing, let alone being related to. Blaming HER for everything, including his decision to sterilize her, without her consent or knowledge. It was her fault because the condom broke. It was her fault for not get out on birth control, when she didn’t even know what it was. It was her fault for letting Rip fuck her. Somehow it was never HIS fault for lying to her face, allowing a nurse and doctor to take her away, pump her full of narcotics and rip out her soul. No one ever talked to her. No one explained what would happen. No one cared. “It wasn’t you,” she whispered into his neck. Rip had never done a single thing to make her feel uncomfortable, unsettled or fearful. He made her feel the safest she’d ever felt. She never felt the anxiety she felt around everyone else. She never had to defend herself. He could let the steel wall down and relax. Him believing he’d done something to make her feel the need to keep their pregnancy from him, hurt more than knowing he knew for two decades and never said a word. She couldn’t imagine how many night he stayed away, trying to figure out what he’d done, how he could talk to her, what he could do to help her naturally bring it up. The nightmares and horrific thoughts he must have had, caused a few more tears to fall. “You never made me feel I couldn’t come to you. I knew I could,” she whispered, softly kissing his neck, and slowly moving her hand over the buttons on his shirt. Pushing a few through the holes. Not purposefully trying to undress him, just mindlessly playing with anything her fingers could reach. “He woulda killed you,” she muttered, more to herself than him. Did she believe it now, mostly no, but the fear of permanently losing him to her father’s hand was very real at fourteen. She saw cowboys disappear since before she could ride a horse. She remembered the yelling and fights between ranch hands. She remembered men getting into trucks and never coming back. And no one knew Rip existed. What would stop her father or brother from killing him and throwing his body at the bottom of a cliff, or burying him in the woods? She didn’t want to take the chance. That was the same reason she didn’t tell him. He would want to do the honorable thing and tell her father anyway; whether she kept it or not.

Rip didn’t believe John would have killed him. Probably would have gotten his ass kicked by Lee, but they wouldn’t have taken his life. Not when they all knew he loved Beth more than himself. They could all see it, even back then. It wasn’t easy for him to hide. He accidentally killed a young man that talked bad about her, after sleeping with her. That was his first trip to the train station. “You don’t have to explain anything. You weren’t ready for this. I’m sorry he did that to you,” he tried to reassure. Kissing her temple and cheek. Although she didn’t look up, he felt her body relax into him. The tension in her back disappeared, as his words sunk into her brain. He didn’t expect a conversation. He didn’t need an explanation. He just needed her to be okay. And this time, he was afraid it would take a long time for these wounds to scar over.

They both jumped when muffled shouting suddenly broke their calm silence. Rip could barely hear a few voices barking, but couldn’t make out what was said, and he honestly didn’t care. He cared about how she jumped and tensed all over again. How he felt her fingers grip the fabric of his button down. Her legs trying to tuck in closer to her chest, but his arm wouldn’t let her move. He ran his heavy hand up her bare thigh, over her hip, caressing her pelvic bone with his thumb. Trying not to shush her, but the whimper that passed her lips as the shouting got louder, made his stomach turn. “It’s okay, baby,” he whispered low in her ear, as she hid her face in his neck. He didn’t hesitate to reach for the remote for the stereo, turning it up as loud as he dared. Not caring if he couldn’t hear his phone or a knock on the door. He didn’t care. Everyone knew where she was, and he doubted they would dare bother them. “It’s gonna be okay,” he muttered against her ear, caressing her cheek, and pushing the stray strands of blond hair behind her shoulder. He felt her squirming against him. Felt her fighting with herself, whether to get up or not. Whether to venture to the window to see what was happening, but his hand tightened on her hip. Her eyes slowly finding his, questions flashing in front of him. “No, baby,” he mumbled, nuzzling her nose as her fingers caressed his cheeks. Running through his well trimmed beard. Her green eyes, filled with tears and regret, but her lips parted as he kissed her gently. She was so soft under his touch. So warm and always clung to him like he was the last man on Earth.

There was no way he was gonna let her run outside. He wasn’t gonna let her pull the curtains back or even turn the music down so she could hear it. Her father trusted him to keep her calm and take care of her. Nothing good could come of her witnessing what would take place next. She already carried the trauma of watching her mother struggle to breathe, and blame her for the accident before she died. She already had to bury one brother. Lee didn’t deserve what happened to him. He never said a bad word towards her or treated her any differently after the accident. He never tried to tell her how to live her life, to stop drinking, stop coming home. He worried about her. He was always happy to see her, as was Kaycee. Now, he knew why Jamie was anything but excited about her return home. “Lay here and talk to me,” he whispered, brushing his fingers down her cheek. He didn’t care what she talked about, what she said, as long as she didn’t move. He didn’t care if they sat in silence until she was too exhausted to stay awake. They curled up on the couch before. It stayed warmer in the living room anyway.

Beth wanted to run outside. She didn’t know why, but she did. She didn’t want to see her brother getting hit by a bunch of cowboys, or worse. She didn’t need those images in her head. She didn’t need to feel more guilt. And it felt too good, sitting in Rips arms, after knowing what she’d done. She felt better and not at the same time. She was glad he knew. She always wanted him to know. She was angry she didn’t get to tell him. That he didn’t hear the words from her first. He heard them with venom attached. From the man that caused her so much pain, at such a young age. “How did you know?” She asked softly, not looking up, but she could feel his glances. She knew she didn’t have to talk about it. She could stay quiet for another twenty years and he wouldn’t say a word. That’s not what she wanted anymore. It was already out, ignore it would only make her want to run more. It was easier to get it over with. She would have to eventually face her father, if not tomorrow, at some point. He would ask her, and apologize again. If she had to face her father with the truth, she was determined to confide in the man that impregnated her. The only man that would ever create a child with her. That loved her enough to make that happen.

Rip knew the first time he saw it shortly after her sixteenth birthday. It was more visible back then than it was now. He knew what it was. He wasn’t a hundred percent positive it was because of him, and by the way she reacted when his fingers ran over the skin, he didn’t ask. He didn’t mention it. He tried his hardest not to even accidentally touch it again. “My mother had a hysterectomy right after my brother was born; same scar,” he replied, trying to move his hand from her thigh, but received a whimper in response. He refused to smile like he wanted to, as he ran his hand back up to her bare hip. He loved how much she wanted and needed him, he didn’t like the reason why.

It didn’t make any sense to Beth. If he knew the entire time, why hadn’t he asked? Why hadn’t he said anything? If he knew she was pregnant with his child, why wasn’t he angry? His affection and comfort confused her. His continuous love was difficult for her to comprehend. She hated herself. She asked herself why every day. “Why didn’t you say anything?” She wanted to know, but didn’t.

Every time he touched her belly after, she would push his hand away, squirm, find some way to get him to move; except say why. He saw the look on her face. Even with her eyes closed, he could see the pain and anxiety. The frustration of wanting to share with him and terrified he would leave. He knew. And for twenty years there was nothing he could do about it. Now he could fix it. He could be there for her, hold her, comfort her like he should have done then. He could be honest with her. “Because of the way you react every time I touch it,” he whispered, catching her hand as she continued playing with the buttons on his shirt. Kissing her fingertips, cut and bruised knuckles. For a few years, he assumed it wasn’t his baby; just by her reaction. Pushing his hands away when he tried to trace the skin. Pulling him from his knees if his lips accidentally grazed the sensitive line. He thought, she refused to talk about to save him the pain of knowing another man got her pregnant and now she couldn’t have that experience again. It was the way she started looking at him after a few years. A profound sadness was always in her eyes. A silent apology only he could see. She never had to say a word, after a while, he knew. “Causing you more pain, isnt worth it to me,” he whispered against her palm, kissing her wrist.

Beth couldn’t help running her fingers through his soft beard. She loved the feeling, and loved even more that he always leaned into her touch. The corner of his mouth always twitched. “You deserved to know,” she muttered, tracing his bottom lip.

“You deserve peace, more than I deserve to know your secrets,” he immediately replied. He didn’t feel he had anymore right to her private life than he father. It was her body. It was her experience and trauma. He didn’t have his body cut open and their child removed before he had the time to comprehend what that life meant. He didn’t have to wake up feeling empty, having no one there she could trust. He didn’t have to live with the regret of no longer being able to have children, because one man lied to him. A set of doctors and nurses betraying her innocence and taking her future with no thought. He wanted to tear the world apart for her. He wanted to rip Jamie to pieces for what he’d done, what he tried to throw in her face. Using her pain as a weapon. He secretly hoped the man suffers.

He may not have felt she was obligated to tell him, but she didn’t feel that way. He was the most loving man she’d ever met. His heart was so big, he had so much kindness to give; he deserved to pass that on. He deserved to be a father, to know he was for a short period of time. She knew he would have been so much more than either of their fathers were, even back then. She wasn’t as confident in herself, but she knew Rip would have been a good parent. “It’s yours too,” she exhaled against his cheek. Kissing him softly, lovingly. The familiar jolt of electricity traveled under skin. A comforting warmth filled her chest.

Rip didn’t NEED to talk about anything. If she didn’t wanna remember what happened, he wouldn’t make her. He didn’t need to know the details, the aftermath was what mattered. But if she wanted to scream every detail and horrific memory, he’d listen. He’d take the burden and carry it for her. As long as the weight on her chest and shoulders were a little less, he’d listen to every cry, scream and troubling thought she ever had. He saw the scar, that was enough. “Wanna talk about it?” He offered, kissing her forehead when her eyes immediately went back to the buttons on his shirt.

Beth still felt too vulnerable to hold Rips eyes for long. Still terrified the anger and judgment still hadn’t set in. “I don’t know how,” she whispered, her brain processing the trauma and fears all over again. Somehow, it hurt worse now, than at fourteen. And she knew it would hurt even more, when the alcohol and pills were finally out of her system. She gave herself mid morning before she had another break down. Rip wouldn’t be able to leave her, she only hoped her father understood. She couldn’t deal with those emotions alone; not again. Not when the loss meant so much more now. She needed the man like she’s never needed anyone. “I lied about the pregnancy test,” she muttered, not sure why. It was obvious she lied, or she wouldn’t have ended up with a hysterectomy. But she needed to start somewhere, and the day she lied to his face still haunted her. Telling him she wasn’t pregnant, was her biggest regret.

“I know, baby,” he whispered, kissing her temple, as her head fell back to his shoulder. “I lied when I said I believed you,” he confessed, feeling her shift in his lap, but thankfully, she didn’t pull away. He remembered the devastated, traumatized look in her eyes, as she lied. He felt it. He saw the truth in her face. But his fourteen year old brain didn’t know how to respond, what was the right thing to do. He knew what he’d do now, but that didn’t help her.

Beth couldn’t remember what his face looked like when she said she wasn’t pregnant. She was pretty sure, she never looked at him while saying it. And she stopped their relationship after that. They never talked about it again. “Why?” If he knew all this time, why did he still want her? Why want to care for her? Why put up with her stringing him along for two decades?why did he still love her?

Rip never felt he had a right to upset her over something he already knew. It was difficult enough for her to open up as much as she did. She had a had enough time being vulnerable. Why make her cry along with everything else she felt? Why make her feel guilty for something she couldn’t control or take back? “Because that’s what you needed,” he whispered, having the look in her eyes, permanently planted in his head for the last two decades. Every time he saw the scar, felt the courage to ask, he’d see her fearful eyes flash in his mind.

Beth didn’t know how to tell him she was pregnant before the abortion. She never even said the words out loud to Jamie. She showed him the test and said she didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t form the words when she finally saw him almost a week later. She still felt the pain in her belly and back as she stood in front of him. A clean bandage and tape covering the stitches. She still bled heavy and cramped harder than she ever had, even though they told her nothing was there anymore. She barely understood what was happening, how was she supposed to tell him? “I didn’t know how…” she tried, but had to take a few slow, deep breaths, as her chest began to ache. She didn’t know how to admit she messed up so badly, they wouldn’t have a future together. She couldn’t give him a family. She couldn’t stop judging herself long enough to figure out if she even wanted it. She still didn’t know. “I couldn’t love you and lie,” she confessed, as the tears poured down her face and neck. She loved him for more than half her life, and was never able to say the words out loud. She wanted to lay next to him every night and wake up laying in his arms. She wanted to be waiting on the porch when he got him. She wanted to make him dinner and have him come back to sit with her for breakfast. She wanted more than anything to be his wife. But the nightmares haunted her. How would she explain clutching her belly and crying into her pillow? She could only lie for so long. She could only pretend she was fine until the anxiety began to build in her chest again. That’s when she always ran. “I couldn’t stay, knowing what I took from you,” she sobbed into his chest. She not only took the future they could have had, she took the child they already created.

Rip knew it was more what she took from herself. What she lost. What she wanted. And he couldn’t give any of it back. He couldn’t fix it. He couldn’t put the pieces back together. For once, she had a scar, that would just have to heal on its own. All he could do, was be there for as long as she’d let him. “You didn’t take anything from me,” he said a little louder, a little more emotion behind his words. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel he hadn’t lost anything. He lost something they created out of confused, angry, pure love. He wished they had it, because she needed it. He wished she could feel her belly swell with their child. He wished she was able to feel the tiny movements and kicks. He wished, more than anything, he could watch it all happen. He held her tighter, knowing he couldn’t.

She didn’t understand why he was still being so nice to her. Why he wasn’t angry. He could have any woman he wanted. Someone that was mentally stable. He could have children with her. He could have a life that wasn’t full of pain and regret. He could forget the bad memories with someone else. “You can’t…”

Rip didn’t know how to make her understand he didn’t need it. He didn’t know what he could do or say to erase her worry. How much he needed to reassure, before her mind would rest. When she would accept she was unconditionally loved for the first time in her life. “I only need you; that’s it,” he stopped her, forcing her chin up. Waiting for her eyes to open and focus on his. For her to stop struggling and chewing her bottom lip like she was TRYING to hurt herself. “I’ve never wanted anything else,” he said with everything he had.

Beth was waiting for the other shoe to drop. She was waiting to see the regret and disappointment. To feel him start to pull away. She spent the last twenty years preparing herself for it. “There’s gonna come a day when you resent me for this,” she whimpered, struggling not to pull away, as he continued staring at her with that same lost love look in his eyes. The one that made her a little uncomfortable. that always made her forget everything that was wrong in the world. He never flinched, never looked away. And the spark never changed.

Rip could see the mental tug a war going on inside her head. It was hard for her not to look away when she was vulnerable. It didn’t matter how many decades they’d known the other, she never could maintain eye contact. But she couldn’t do it with anyone, it wasn’t him; she was supposed to be unbreakable all the time. She was the tough one. She didn’t cry like Jamie or whine like Kaycee. If she was angry, she wouldn’t have a problem staring him down. If she were in her office, she was more than confident. But with him, there was a softness that no one else got to see. There was a crack in her armor she was never able to completely close. He could see it every time he looked at her; that’s why he never gave up. He never stopped loving her, no matter the damage she inflicted. “No, baby,” he reassured, running his fingers down her wet cheek, her neck. He could feel her heart pounding under his finger tips. “I love you; that will never change.” He kissed her so softly, he felt the needy breath against his face, as he pulled away before she could deepen it. He wanted to get the hard part over with. She needed to feel the uneasiness, the fear, the pain, instead of continuing to avoid it. Any way to avoid any more uncomfortableness, she’d take it if he’d let her. Whether it be with sex or running, she’d use it; and he couldn’t blame her. He would rather let her avoid, but the thought of her continuous internal self harm, made him push through his own doubt. She hadn’t pulled away yet, that was more than she’d ever done.

Rip regretted not turning the music up louder, as a gun shot rang out. Her entire body jumped and tensed against his chest. Her face buried in his neck all over again. Her fingers gripping the fabric of his shirt. He heard the almost silent whimpers, as another shot filled their silence. He felt the tremors run through her body, the sweat come and go on her skin, as the adrenaline spiked and fell over and over again. As panic quickly started creeping back under her skin. He heard the sharp, painful inhales against his neck. “No no no…” he muttered, running his fingers through her hair. Covering her ear, as he caressed her cheek; feeling the silent tears against his fingertips. “You don’t know what that was; don’t assume,” he said rougher than he intended, but he was angry they didn’t take Jamie further from the house to handle the problem. They all knew where she was taking refuge. They knew she would hear every sound.

For a moment, Beth couldn’t help feeling a little agitated and aggravated that he was treating her like she hadn’t been raised on the ranch. That she never heard the fighting or familiar gun shots, followed by a missing rancher. “I’m not glass, Rip, or stupid,” she sniffled into his shoulder, knowing he meant well, but treating her with kid gloves wasn’t necessary. She knew what happened. She knew in the morning, Jamie wouldn’t be there and no one would say a word. How would their father tell Kaycee? Would he tell her little brother why? Would he blame her? She didn’t know if her conscience could handle another death. “I can’t believe he did it,” she muttered, trying to relax and let Rips scent surround her. Trying to let the man that loved her more than his own life, comfort her. He wanted to take care of her so badly, for so long, it took every last bit of restraint she had, not to run; not to move when she felt his lips in her neck again. When his fingers ran slowly up her thigh and bare hip.

Rip could believe. The amount of times he heard John threaten his son, look at his with fire in his eyes; he was actually surprised it took so long. He crossed a line hurting his only daughter. Even if it was the boys sister, it was his father’s baby girl; the only one he was lucky enough to have. Rip saw the way he looked at Beth and the way he looked at his sons; it was like oil and water. His sons might have carried on the family name, but his daughter walked around with his heart and soul. “You’re still his baby. It doesn’t matter how you see it. It doesn’t matter that you don’t realize you’ve always been his favorite. Someone hurt his baby. Doesn’t matter who it was,” he mumbled in her ear. Trying not to move as more shouting was heard in the distance, then an engine turning over. He didn’t need to hear what was said to know what was happening; the body had to be gone by morning. He wouldn’t be surprised if the other cowboys already had the blood already covered and washed away. “He’s lucky if a bullets all he got,” he shouldn’t have said it, as he felt her lips on his neck, but meant the words. If he’d had the opportunity, he wouldn’t have wasted the bullet. He didn’t regret not staying outside with John and Lloyd. He regretted not killing the man years ago.

Beth could remember a thousand times, crying in Rips bed, on the very couch they were sitting on, over something Jamie said or did. She could remember all the times she saw the rage flash in his eyes. How he gripped her harder, held her closer. “I know,” she muttered against his ear. Feeling a heavy sigh against her shoulder, before the blanket was pulled up her back. She couldn’t help letting his scent, his warmth, the pounding of his heart against her fingers to finally ease her mind. Despite what was happening outside, what had happened, he was there. He didn’t look at her any differently. He still held her just the same. Nothing, but the weight finally lifting from her chest, had changed. “Thank you for staying with me,” she whispered, only pulling away enough to see his face. He had every reason to be the one to tear her brother apart. Her father probably would have gladly let him. But she needed him, and he felt it.

When Rip finally saw her face, there was a lightness, a glow he hadn’t seen since they were fourteen. A spark so familiar, yet so foreign igniting for the first time in twenty years. Before the world and her family extinguished it. Jamie said he’d forgotten what she was like before her mother died, but if they took the time to really look, the innocent, sweet girl was still there. Still begging for someone to notice the pain, and fix it. “I’m not going anywhere,” he reassured, kissing the tip of her nose and watching her cheeks flush. The corner of her mouth curl, as she licked her lips. “Will you stay?” He asked against wet, parted lips.

Beth didn’t look away, as she grabbed his hand and held it against her belly. Feeling him sigh, before barely grazing her lips with his own. His fingers grazing the scar without her pushing him away. The immediate jolt of uncomfortableness quickly faded, as he nipped and sucked her bottom lip between his teeth. He asked her to stay. He still wanted her. She still felt the innocent love pouring from his skin. “Forever…” she muttered, catching the violent spark ignite in his beautiful blue eyes, before he was kissing her again. She finally had no reason to run.