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The wind blew hard that night. The windows rattled, and their muffled rumblings filled the dimly lit room, where the two young men lay side by side on a small bed.
Reiner shrank and curled up in Eren's arms. Despite being nearly twice his size, he needed his presence, almost like oxygen.
Eren caressed his still-sweaty back as he took his last, long breaths. That night, too, they had loved each other for over an hour. Neither of them ever seemed to lack the necessary stamina. This way, they could love each other more, more intensely. Much more than two normal human beings.
Eren closed his eyes. He listened to Reiner's deep, gradually regular breathing.
He turned to look at his face. He caressed his cheek, soft but with rough skin, marked by time and battle. By suffering and regret.
"Reiner..." Eren whispered his name softly, to call him, but also to reassure himself that he was truly there, beside him.
Reiner opened his eyes. "Hm?"
"You loved Bertholdt?" He asked bluntly. That was Eren. He wanted to know, and he asked.
Reiner took a deep breath. He adjusted his posture so he could see his companion better.
The windows rattled with a gust of wind.
"It's hard to explain..." He lowered his gaze. "I mean, it's obvious he was more than a friend to me. But... I can't say I loved him."
Eren was silent for a moment. He looked at his companion's long eyelashes, his prominent nose. His thin lips, now pursed.
"And what did you feel about Historia?" He was direct again.
Reiner's eyes widened. "What does Historia have to do with it now?"
"I don't know. I was told you liked her."
Reiner didn't speak.
Eren took a breath and turned away. Maybe he'd asked too much. Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut, because now the doubts and questions had increased. Maybe it was jealousy, maybe it was his fear of couldn't replace Bertholdt or Historia.
Reiner leaned in a little and placed a small kiss on Eren's back, between the red scratches left by his own nails. "Eren... all that matters to me is what I do with you."
Eren bit his cheek. "And what do you do with me?"
Reiner leaned in even closer and hugged his partner from behind. He wrapped his arms around him and took his hands in his. "I do everything with you. We fight together, we kiss, we have sex. We wake up holding each other."
Eren rolled his eyes and grimaced. "I didn't think you could be so sappy. You kind of make me want to throw up."
Reiner gently bit Eren's back, where his neck began. "You're the one who brought out this side of me."
"You're acting like we're dating. We're not, okay? We said just sex."
Reiner nodded, then buried his face in Eren's scented hair, and tightened his grip on his partner's. "That's right. You'll never hear me ask you to be more. I'm fine with that. It's already so much more than I wanted."
Eren sighed. Deep down, he hoped a little that they could be more. But he could never admit to Reiner that he'd fallen in love with him. Never.
And yet, every night they fell asleep like this. The only glimmer of tranquility and hope that kept them alive in that hell. The one moment of peace they so deserved.
And Reiner wanted this to last forever.